Tumgik
#2024 is the year where i draw every ship that i like
gomzdrawfr · 2 months
Text
Debrief
Tumblr media
430 notes · View notes
datura-tea · 4 months
Text
holy shit this year marks 10 years of this blog and moz!! i can't remember the exact date i started posting here - my archive says i have one post from november 2013 but let's disregard that - but i do remember it was around late 2014/early 2015 :)
Tumblr media
^ one of the very first moz art pieces i ever drew, for fallout week 2015!!
memories and art through the years under a read more bc it got long
2014 → baby's first rpg!! i started playing fnv on my cousin's jailbroken xbox late 2013 and finished mid 2014 and i loved every minute of it. i remember waking up at 8am and playing almost nonstop until 2am the next day haha!
i didn't play moz on my first playthrough - but i did start creating a character that would eventually become her: a shorthaired ex-boxer who punched her way through obstacles when diplomacy failed. i remember she spent a lot of time with boone. i liked him then, because he saved my ass more times than i can count. but i digress. this is draft 1 moz essentially
Tumblr media Tumblr media
2015 → this is the year that i was doing my thesis so i could graduate but i was so depressed and stressed about it that i distracted myself by replaying fnv on pc, where i played through the dlcs for the first time. i fell in love with the dlcs' oversarching story; particularly ulysses, who i became obssessed with, especially since i couldn't find any content of him at the time. in the game, i played as moz; i had most of her personality and choices down, but her backstory was still up in the air.
fun fact: this was an existing sideblog that i remade to be a fallout blog so i could look for ulysses content, and when i couldn't find any, i made some myself, featuring moz as my main courier six. originally, i didn't ship them, but eventually i ended the year as a courier/ulysses otp shipper.
this was the year i started drawing digitally - my uncle let me borrow a drawing tablet and i used an old copy of photoshop i pirated hehe
Tumblr media Tumblr media
2016 → i graduated this year!! and promptly fell deeper into my depression. this was the year that it got so bad that i had to be medicated. through it all, this blog and moz and ulysses and my fandom friends were with me. and for that i am truly grateful :) this was the year i figured out how to lock transparent pixels so that i could color my lineart lol
Tumblr media
2017 → i started hammering out moz's backstory this year i think. there's a lot of sketches of her and her family in my files. i experimented with shading and backgrounds here but that experimentation was pretty short-lived
Tumblr media
2018 → i started using references seriously!!!! i did a lot of oc on oc kissing this year, featuring mostly moz and many friend ocs haha
Tumblr media
2019 → didn't draw much this year. actually this year was a blur and i can't remember much from it except from it being the year of my terrible no good bad copywriting jobs... anyway i did manage to continue my courier/ulysses brainrot and make this piece, which i'm still proud of
Tumblr media
2020 → pandemic time. i spent a lot of time asleep at home and i think this was also the year i started doing commissions?? shoutout to anyone who has ever commissioned me - thank you so much, i truly appreciate it!!
Tumblr media
2021 → i switched from my old-ass pirated photoshop to clip studio paint and never looked back. also i did a bunch of commissions for my grandmother's surgery, which failed, and i distracted myself from the sadness by drawing my ocs over and over and playing disco elysium
Tumblr media
2022 → by this year, i've got moz down pat and have started vaguely developing other ocs instead. but she's still always at the back of my mind
Tumblr media
2023 → i bought new brushes from true grit texture supply and immediately found new favorites that i started using for everything. i tentatively started incorporating background elements in some pieces!
Tumblr media
2024 → while it's still too early to say where this year will lead me art-wise, i will say that i started experimenting in realistic paint studio (which i bought in 2021, the same time as clip studio paint) a few days ago and i'm liking the results so far. we'll see!
Tumblr media
all in all, these last 10 years have been quite a ride, but i'm glad i stuck around and i'm glad you guys stuck around too!! much much love 💖💖💖
83 notes · View notes
d999666 · 3 months
Text
I got tagged by @cerisia76 on this:
Tag 9 people you want to know better
But I don't have anyone to tag! Now that I've been tagged, I'll write it down. (My native language is not English. Grammar or words may be awkward. Please understand.)
3 ships :
Hiccup x Astrid(How to Train Your Dragon/HTTYD)
Tumblr media
You don't know how much I love this couple. I was always happy to see this couple from HTTYD 1 to 3, and in the TV show series. In HTTYD 3, they are married and have children. They look great together. I want to draw their fan art someday. (I'm practicing.)
2. D'jok & Tia(Galactik football)
Tumblr media
Yes, I know. Tia's love is Rocket.
I like D'jok and Tia's brother-sister relationship. These two people depend on each other. Obviously, these are my favorite characters in Galactik football. The chemistry between these two is crazy.
3. Zuko & Katara(Avatar: The Last Airbender, ATLA)
Tumblr media
I'm careful about this couple, because Katara eventually married 'Aang' in the formula. And Zuko married mai. But the tense relationship between the two in the show was interesting.
( I'm supporting any coupling.) It's interesting how Katara forgives zuko, and how zuko makes mistakes and repents. Eventually, get to the fire episode. Katara and zuko became colleagues. At the end, the scene where zuko threw himself for katara to prevent danger is one of the best scenes.
Last song:
youtube
Zac Efron, Zendaya - Rewrite The Stars
It's a song I've been listening to over and over again every day these days. I haven't watched this movie, but I liked the OST, so I put it on my playlist.
Last Movie:
Tumblr media
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
I didn't watch a movie this year. The last movie I saw in the movie theater last year was Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3. It was my favorite series in the Marvel series, and I don't want to think it's over. The members had great chemistry. I know that even if they went different paths, they would get together whenever there was a space crisis.
Currently reading:
Tumblr media
Kurusiya no Hitorigoto(The Apothecary Diaries)
Recently, I am reading a novel called The Apothecary Diaries. I liked this book even before it became famous for its animation. Recently, 13 books came out and I am reading it. (The animation is on Netflix exclusively.)
Currently watching:
Tumblr media
Delicious in Dungeon
Tumblr media
Frieren: Beyond Journey's End
Both animations are on Netflix. I was happy that my favorite works would be animated in 2023 and 2024.
Currently drinking:
I drink americano at work to get rid of my drowsiness. Even if it's cold in the winter, I always drink iced coffee. Coldness and caffeine are the best for driving away sleepiness.
Currently craving:
When I was in college, I couldn't afford to buy animation Merchandise because I was busy working part-time. But now that I start making money, I have some leeway in my life.
I know that I enjoy minor genres (minor fandom).
There are only a few Merchandise that are officially sold.
So I thought, 'If you don't have any, let me make one.' I made a necklace with the names of my favorite characters engraved on it.
I put commission to get the illustration I wanted. (I didn't upload.)
Of course, I draw fan art, but I'm not good at drawing.
Recently, I've been looking for photo cards and doll making.
I want more Merchandise.
7 notes · View notes
danggirlronpa · 5 months
Text
Merch Monday comes 'round once again!
[Obligatory Ko-fi Link Because This Is A Post Where I Spent Real Person Money]
As always I forgot to do this several times, so there's plenty of backlog from this last month to get through. The Seasons of Despair zine came in today, and I've only got enough time to do one of these. So we'll hit the zine today, and everything else tomorrow!
So: Seasons of Despair!
Tumblr media
TLDR; Aesthetically excellent! No major issues except the exclusion of some characters in the art, some more notable than others.
This is a "zine" only insomuch as it's creation project - actually, it's a calendar for 2024! It's more general than ship, so normally I wouldn't really cover it on this blog. But some of the merch is really cute, and I just think the whole project is a really cool idea!
I got the paper bundle, because I simply cannot justify to myself spending more than $50 on a zine except for, like, the DR WLW Zine, which I am legally and morally obligated to gather all of like a dragon with its hoard. That means none of the pins or charms.
EDIT: They've asked people not post the inside of the calendar, so the image that was here has been removed! If the stance changes it will be reinserted.
The actual calendar itself is just fine! Nothing special about the make. The art is all gorgeous. The birthday listings and the art around the bottom half are really nice touches - I lost most of those polls on Twitter, but I'm glad my girl Komaru made it. They managed to get almost every character with a canon birthday on the monthly art too (sorry Miaya)!
I have a total of two (2) issues with the calendar.
1. Jack isn't anywhere in this, even though Toko shows up multiple times, and their birthday is only listed under Toko. Which. Bummer. (Izuru is also just listed under Hajime, but he shows up in other art throughout the zine.)
2. There's a full THH spread, a major char UDG spread, and two full SDR2 spreads, but no V3 spread. The closest is ten characters, which isn't 16, and which has several characters mostly blocked behind others or barely visible. They all still get their faces on their birthday in the calendar itself, of course! But it's a bummer that the only sight of Angie, Ryoma, and Korekiyo is the back of their heads.
Other than that, I'm very happy with this! I'll be using it throughout the year, so we'll see very quickly if it holds up.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The little cherry stickers and this stretch goal print are the main reason I bought the paper merch instead of just the calendar! These both feature art by @axolotllotl, who is a blog favorite. The stickers are actually the shinier of the two, and are notably higher quality than the other sticker pages that came with the zine. We won't be going over the other stickers, but they're just more paper-y - you can tell a lot of care was put into these! (Not that I won't be using the other stickers. You KNOW I'm putting that heart eyes Monokuma in a strategic location.)
& I LOOOVE the print. It's actually on lower quality material than the stickers and the calendar, but that's not a bad thing! Every piece of this zine has slightly different quality, I assume for manufacturing reasons. There are no defects and the art is gorgeous - I love the way she draws Kyoko, it's so cute.
Generally, I'm pretty happy with this! It'll definitely see the most active use of any zines I own, especially since this blog celebrates the girls' birthdays. We'll see how it holds up long term!
6 notes · View notes
masschase · 11 months
Note
domestic life 3 and 8 for matt and casey! i genuinely love those two so much and can’t get enough of them :)
Thank you, it is so reassuring to hear people say stuff like this. My brain always tells me no-one wants to hear about my blorbos, haha.
Ship ask meme
All the spoilers warning but also I think I went right off the fucking rails on of the first question. Dear god.
Domestic life 3. How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like?
Oooookkkkkkaaaayyyyy listen. I feel so stupid typing this all out here even though those who've finished the fanfic know, because I always feel like on tumblr I maybe possibly present Casey and Matt like two kids who fuck about watching Nyte Blayde and running around shooting shit and dressing up in pretty goth clothes and *occasionally* dabbling in running a ship/planet together. But realistically they are fairly responsible adults, they have a planet to settle down on and resources and an excellent support system. So yes, they do have children and yes, I've known for a long time they were going to even when it's mostly not that era I'm drawing them in.
Again, this may be a bit of a surprise to some but from the age of about 25, Casey kind of decided she wanted kids and quite a few of them. 3 or 4 but probably 4. Told you she thought she was a fucking Kennedy. It's something she'd thought about since she was running for President, the idea of leaving a legacy, the idea of raising a human to adulthood and... she wouldn't admit it but she does actually like kids. She just says they make her uncomfortable and I've just mentioned in the last ask meme she gets that way when she knows she can't really have something.
She knows it's not practical while she's fighting gangs and shit. But she figures when she's President it might be safer. She never really decided if she was going to go back on her views on partnership or go it alone for that. I think she knew it probably still wasn't the most realistic of aspirations.
She starts thinking about it again when they're getting ready to take over the planet, but she's convinced she may die there and has no partner anyway, so her views on it are quite bleak. Of course, once they havr actually finished taking over, bearing in mind she's with Matt by this point, those thoughts start to creep back in. They make vague references to it when talking about the home they are going to build together, and this is kind of where they talk about their options being hide in the past somewhere, fight every time, or run when they need to, and they decide they will lean towards the latter.
She ends up putting her usual issues around talking about stuff like this aside and ends up asking him around 7 months later when her birth control shot is due to run out. It takes almost a year for them to concieve, and she starts getting rather impatient at not being able to control this like she can most things. But it does happen for them.
Matt was encouraged to think about having children perhaps a little earlier than a lot of people, back when Casey was always talking about getting him a partner out of the pods and how they would need to encourage people to repopulate the new planet. He only really pictured having 2 but I don't think he felt too strongly about it, so they quickly settled on 3. Probably for the best seeing as Casey's second pregnancy was twins. 🤣 I was thinking about all the risk factors they'd have for twins(she was 35, tall, possibly still breastfeeding, eats a lot of dairy, it was a second pregnancy, he was only 27 so probably fairly fertile now they were far enough away from the zin goo-based fertility issues) and I thought yeah, let's say that happened. In this case it happened the very first month (on their first full night without their eldest since she was born actually, any guesses when that was? 😉) so... even though they did choose to start trying again it still managed to be a massive shock to them both.
Victory is their eldest, born June 2024, I'm sure some of you saw the picture I snuck out although it's far from perfect. When I made a post back in April about drawing something I couldn't put out bc of spoilers that was it, hehe. She has very curly/wavy mid blonde hair as a kid, and bright blue eyes with a very slight ring of hazel around the iris (I drew this the wrong way around in my picture) Her eyes stay like this into adulthood but her hair gets darker brown, more like Matt's (roots) or Casey's mom's/sister's. In terms of features though I think she looks more like Casey than Matt. She's very intelligent, independent, thoughtful, creative, and quite assertive/bossy.
The twins are 22 months younger, born April 2026, and I think they are identical; a cis boy and as they later find a trans girl, with hazel eyes; the same kind of goldy shade as Casey's for the most part but the outer ring is more grey/blue whereas Casey's is more brown/green. Their hair is also wavy and very blonde as kids but doesn't darken as much as adults; they remain darkish blonde. Their features are a fairly even mix of their parents though (god knows what that looks like 🤣) I'm not certain on names yet at all. Either something similar to Victory's or I quite like the idea of using Apollo and Artemis. Since Artemis is a goddess but gender neutral as a name, so I can see her keeping it, just maybe changing her nickname to Emi rather than what they were using before. But I'm using their names here as placeholders only. The twins are better sleepers than their big sister, also pretty smart, clingier with their parents, especially Apollo, but they're also very boisterous and due to having a big sister as an example, talkative from a lot earlier. Like when they're all toddlers the younger two are running around causing absolute chaos while Victory is laying on the floor trying to draw. Everyone says the twins are gonna grow up acting more like Uncle Gat than their parents. Artemis never stops singing. Apollo is always hungry.
I think Matt probably suggested Nyte Blayde names but Casey brought up that all the ones with cool names are characters at least one of them are attracted to so it wouldn't be appropriate!
I guess this is a good a post as any to get at least a vague thing written out about how they're able to have a safe life. Matt manages to extrapolate the Zin cloaking technology to the entire planet, basically, while he and Kinzie wipe all the data about said technology, and the planet's co-ordinates, from the Zin database, replaced by the message "Ragnarok Wins Forever".
There are still minor insurrections, but Johnny and occasionally a few others mainly take care of those. As for Casey getting to still do what she loves... with gradual improvement, Matt was able to program a simulation as good as the Zin's but without the brain-frying side-effects so that they can fight together any time they have a spare moment to themselves(which is obviously not that difficult, with the Saints making up this big family it's not hard to find someone to take the kids for an hour or so) so she's really not missing out any more than she was on the spaceship. The time inbetween is much more fulfilling than back then though.
Something I decided only recently was that although in theory Matt and Casey could time travel off anywhere for a week when they needed a break and pop back to the same time; surely a dream for most parents, it seems so wrong for them to be out of sync with their own children that they decide not to, until they're adults and can kind of decide to travel separately if they want. Fortunately, again, they do get breaks thanks to the other Saints.
That whole thing with their different schedules is pretty useful by this point. Matt doesn't mind dealing with a few wakeups up until 2/3am while Casey will get up at 5/6am if she has to so they just have to hope the baby might sleep a little longer between those times... maybe... hopefully 😅
So yeah, I have more I could say here but I feel like I've let out a lot of my insanity at once here, lets move onto something more lighthearted immediately. :)
Domestic life 8. Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning?
Now in theory, Matt would be the one more in a position to do this, because Casey tends to wake earlier. But more likely to convince is a different matter. I think if Casey wanted him back in bed it'd pretty much take her beckoning with one finger. *Maybe* a slight puppy-dog-eyes-and-pout if he's being resistant. Of course it really helps when any complaints about having work to do can be met with:
"Oh really? And who's your Boss again?"
4 notes · View notes
mariacallous · 2 years
Text
If you’ve found the past few days in British politics tumultuous, spare a thought for the chair of the 1922 Committee, Sir Graham Brady, who reportedly returned to work on Monday after a half-term break in Athens to a pile of letters from rebellious Tory MPs trying to oust Liz Truss. We can only imagine his serenity as he contemplated the wonder of democracy at the Parthenon, before wandering into Westminster, putting down his carrier bag of duty free, and asking:“What did I miss?”
Just a little, Graham! Over the past few days, Truss’s entire government agenda has been rewritten – and worse still, not even by her. Today’s emergency statement by the new chancellor, Jeremy Hunt, confirmed the kind of change in direction that typically causes whiplash: almost all of the remaining tax cuts from the mini-budget have been scrapped, with even Truss’s flagship plan to cap rising energy prices scaled back.
Watching Hunt set out the new plans with the union jack behind him, it was hard to tell who exactly was the prime minister. It was all very “the military has taken control of the airwaves”. Penny Mordaunt later explained to the House of Commons as she stood in for Truss: “The prime minister is not under a desk.” Always good to clarify. At this point, Truss is less prime minister and more a competition winner, like aprimary school pupil given a tour of parliament and told they are allowed to “run the country for a day” while the grownups actually make the decisions.
Unfortunately for the rest of us, the “grownups” include a health secretary who hates certain commas more than smokers giving children cancer, a chancellor whose nemesis is junior doctors, and Grant Shapps. Not that you’d notice. The standard for leadership in this country is now so low that the Conservatives could appoint Hannibal Lecter to steady the ship and sections of the British commentariat would praise him as a “safe pair of hands”.
Hunt hasn’t specified as yet which public services will face the squeeze to make up the estimated £72bn shortfall, but he will require “all departments”, including health, to make “difficult decisions”.
“Savings” has a comforting implication of efficiency – some fat that can safely be trimmed. Rather than, y’know, brutal cuts to already collapsing public services that are only “needed” to offset the government’s own disastrous choices.
On the grand list of obscenities the Conservative party has inflicted over the past 12 years in power, further wrecking public services in order to pay for its own foul-up, all as poverty and needs spiral, is surely up there. Truss is launching Austerity 2.0 with a mandate so nonexistent that even her own chancellor didn’t vote for her. The government is essentially now just a living embodiment of the hotdog costume meme, crashing in and surveying the economic carnage while promising it will find the guy who did this.
Don’t panic, though, because the Tory party is already lining up its next guy. Senior Conservatives are said to be holding talks this week that could lead to the swift removal of Truss as leader. To which anyone’s response is likely, “PLEASE GOD NO. NOT ANOTHER ONE.” The idea that the solution to Truss’s premiership is to go back to the Conservative membership is very much like seeing the police tape up a crime scene and inviting the murderer to return to have another go.
Even Tory MPs seem to think so – there is talk that they could draw up a shortlist of two candidates, and agree among themselves who would be PM and deputy to avoid going to the members. As they lurch on to their fifth leader in six years, we risk running through the entire Conservative party in ever decreasing quality until every single Tory MP has had a go. By 2024, the next PM will be the chasm where Suella Braverman’s soul should be. Or a lettuce.
I don’t know about you, but I spend much of my day now pondering how I’ll survive the next two years until a general election, a plan that so far involves drinking bucket-gin and living off-grid. It’s not like we’re guaranteed electricity this winter anyway. As mortgage rates rise and food banks have to ration provisions, Britain is feeling increasingly uninhabitable. Indeed, if the government’s cost-cutting plan to let patients get antibiotics without seeing a GP goes ahead, we may have all been wiped out by mass antibiotic resistance by then anyway. At this point, I’d class that as a merciful escape.
5 notes · View notes
aerinis · 4 months
Text
Doing my belated 2023 art review. Putting it below a read more because a lot of stuff happened this year and some of it is kind of heavy.
2023 was a pretty good year for me, both personally and artistically. I had a couple of annoying minor medical issues that I'm still dealing with, but I'd say I was able to maintain my goal of drawing at least one little doodle a day for most of the year. I will say though that the vast majority of what I drew this year - probably like 95% - was personal art. Hopefully someday I'll be satisfied enough with it to post it. I'd also like to spend 2024 focusing more on painting and practicing landscapes. I spent the first three months of the year working on a piece for a local art gallery competition, which actually ended up getting accepted and subsequently spent the rest of the year touring around the state in several different exhibitions. That introduced me to the wonderful world of trying to figure out how the hell digital prints and shipping work, but everything turned out fine in the end. It remains the largest piece I've ever made at 18"x24", and hopefully once I get it shipped back to me I'll be sending it off to my parents. I also found out that I HATE writing artist's statements, like fuck off you don't need to know my background, just interpret the piece however. I'd like to post here, but I want to make sure first that it hasn't been uploaded to the internet by any of the galleries since I'd like to keep my personal info off this blog lmao What's funny is that I feel like I've come so far as an artist ever since I submitted that piece, that every time I look at the B-grade prints I have lying around I'm like "oh my god this looks terrible, I can't believe this got accepted". I guess that's just what being an artist is like Following that, I took the next month off from art, which was a nice little break. I did a bunch of art parties in FFXIV, which are always great for improving, because as counter-intuitive as it seems the best way to get good at art is to be forced to draw a whole bunch of different things under strict time limits. I feel like I can definitely see my lineart improving as the months go on. I also started working more with color, my eternal nemesis, and I'm hoping next year I can really start to nail down a style. I did Art Fight for the first time ever in July and it ROCKED, definitely going to do it again this year and I'm still pretty proud of the drawings I did. I love an event where it's socially acceptable for me to draw people's OCs. I think I'll probably focus on doing more WoW OCs this year. Unfortunately July is the busiest month for me at work, where I'm waking up at 5AM for basically the entire month straight and working in 100+ degree weather, so we'll see if I can maintain the energy for it.
And now the heavy stuff. Some of you might know that I'm pretty involved in the secret finding community in WoW, and back during BFA when we spent 11.5 months trying to find Jenafur, I did paint-overs of a bunch of cat memes to try and keep spirits up during the hunt. Unfortunately, the Make-A-Wish kid who created the pet ended up passing away in April. You can read about her life here in this article that will make you want to guillotine a chemical executive, and this older interview from 2020 about the secret. But what really got to me was this one line from the PCGames interview:
Tumblr media
And like, I don't want to be presumptuous but like. I think she was talking about my art. Every time I posted on she'd comment on it, and she even DMed me about them. This line fucking destroyed me. I'm not even going to exaggerate. For several days after we found out about her death I was a wreck. The thought that my silly little drawings actually had an impact on someone and made their life a little brighter just ruined me. The bill she was fighting for ended up passing, and I hope that someday the idea of 'forever chemicals' will cease to exist.
Downer ending but I'm kind of too bummed out to write more
0 notes
ultrainfinitepit · 4 years
Text
About and FAQ
Hi I’m Ultra aka. Skystreak. she/her, old and boring (30-ish)
Here’s my:
Linktree with other social media sites and my shop newsletter
personal blog where you can find lots of #angels I like
List of charities I like
2022 Pride Angels: I II III IV V 🌈
2024 Pride Angels: here. Please read the Pride Angels FAQ below.
Pins I am in search of 🔍
Pin Catalog (every pin I have made or produced): I II
Looking for guest artist pins? Check out the Guest Artist Spotlights.
My profile pic is by @gavalaa.
Where I sell
Shopify and Etsy - my main shops. Shopify has lower prices due to lower fees. Etsy is recommended for EU/UK customers. I package and ship everything myself, and keep only my latest designs in stock. If you’re looking for older designs, check out my stockists (below).
Gumroad - free digital downloads, including lineart for personal use such as tattoos.
Redbubble - print-on-demand items featuring my designs.
Mercari - where I sell pins second-hand from my personal collection.   
Faire - wholesale storefront, if you are a retailer you can purchase my products here in bulk at a discount.
Stockists
These are independent retailers selling my items. They handle all the fulfillment for me, so if you have any issues with orders from these stockists, please contact them directly.
SJMade - based in San Jose, California. My items are available for purchase online or in the physical MOMENT JTown storefront. They offer US shipping only.
BizBaz Club - based in San Diego, California. My items are available for purchase online or in their San Diego boba shop. They offer US and international shipping.
Mushroomy - based in Melbourne, Australia. My items are available for purchase online. They offer US and international shipping. If you’re in Australia, feel free to send me an ask with requests for merch to ship to Mushroomy and it’ll be included in my next shipment. If you purchase from them you’ll save a ton on shipping!
Gamelandia Palo Alto - based in Palo Alto, California. In-person and online shopping. A small selection of my pins are available for purchase.  They offer US shipping only.
Big Whale Consignment - based in Seattle, Washington. My items are available in-person at their Greenwood storefront on Aurora Ave; and online as well. They offer US and international shipping.
Pinconvention (Seasonal) - based in Hamburg, Germany, with in-person or online shopping. They are only open a few days a year and there’s no guarantee I’ll be accepted as a vendor. You can follow them on social media for updates and more information. Pinconvention offers much cheaper shipping with no VAT to EU/UK destinations.
⭐I am looking for stockists in Canada, Europe, and Asia; if you have a promising lead please let me know!
Pride Angels FAQ
What is Pride Angels?
It is my series of angel designs in the colors of different Pride flags. I am planning to make the Pride Angels into stickers, pins, keychains, patches, and lanyards. The campaign is planned for June 2024, after Angelology IV. You can follow the pre-launch page to be notified when the campaign launches.
Can you draw X for the Pride Angels series?
Before inquiring, please check that your request is not already complete!
You can find the 2022 Pride Angels here: I II III IV V
You can find the 2024 Pride Angels here.
You can also search my Pride Angels tag for even more designs.
I am not taking requests for any new flags at this time, but read on for how you can request a Pride Angel during the pin campaign. After I complete this series in 2024, I am not planning to make any more Pride Angels.
About the Pride Angels design request pledge tier:
If you would like to request a Pride Angel, I will have a pledge tier available in the pin campaign to pay to request one. Outside these pledge tiers I will not be accepting any requests. Please save your requests for the pin campaign!
If you nab one of the design request pledges, you can request a flag and optionally suggest a theme or inspiration. If I shared a design you liked that I ended up not going with or you want to recolor an existing design, you could request that too.
Where can I find the 2022 Pride Angels merch?
Most of the past Pride Angels have been discontinued in my main shops, but you can still find them as pins, stickers, keychains, and patches with my stockists.
I liked an old design better. Will the old designs be available during the campaign?
Depending on order quantity I will make the 2022 Pride Angels available as stickers, keychains, pins, and patches. If they don't meet the order threshold they will not be funded.
Can I draw a Pride Angel too?
Of course, I don't own angels or Pride flags! If I inspired you I would love to be tagged to see and share your design.
Other FAQ
Can I use your art for a tattoo/profile pic/inspiration/etc?
Feel free to use my designs or illustrations for personal, non-commercial use! I have some art readily available on Gumroad such as for tattoos. You may use other artwork as well. However if it’s a commission or request from someone I’d prefer you don’t use those.
If you happen to get a tattoo or make something of my art and post it somewhere, I’d love to be tagged to see how it turned out! And If you’re a tattoo artist or other creator posting your take on my art, I would kindly ask that you credit me as the designer or inspiration. Additionally, I do not allow tattoo artists to use my designs in their flash sheets.
Since the art is online for free anyway, I don’t expect you to pay me for it. But if you’d like to support me financially, do check out my shops, donate when you download the art from Gumroad, or consider a donation to one of the charities I like.
What is personal, non-commercial use?
This means you are free to use my designs as long as you do not profit off them. You may not provide them to another maker to be made into products that they will profit off of. If you are an artist using exact parts of my art (such as traced portions) or your take on my art (such as, a very specific character design that you are using for your own), you may not profit off these pieces. Only I am allowed to profit off my art.
I’m a pin campaign backer and I’m wondering where my pins are; or I have another question about my pledge.
Please read the latest updates on the campaign page for more information. If you have an issue with your shipment or a question about your pledge, please message me on the crowdfunding platform. Please do not message me on social media, if you do this I may miss your message.
I missed the latest crowdfunding campaign! Can I still get the pins?
If it's just after the campaign ended, check the campaign page for a link to the Backerkit preorder store. If the preorder store is closed, you will have to wait until leftovers are available in my shops. Please read the campaign page for more details.
Do you ship internationally?
My Shopify and Etsy shops have international shipping, as do some of my stockists (more details above).
Why is shipping to Germany and France unavailable?
Shipping to Germany and France is unavailable due to LUCID and EPR packaging laws respectively. Please check my stockists for shipping availability, or help me find a stockist in your country so I can ship to you!
Why is an item on Etsy unavailable in the UK?
Etsy sometimes blacklists my items for shipping to the UK due to word filters. If you are in the UK and an item is unavailable for this reason, please message me on Etsy.
How can I get cheaper international shipping?
Regarding international shipping prices, they are determined by Shopify and Etsy and I have no control over them. If the shipping price is an issue for you, please check with my stockists. Depending on your location they may have cheaper shipping.
⭐I am looking for stockists in Canada, Europe, and Asia; if you have a promising lead please let me know!
I have a problem with my order!
Please do not message me on social media, if you do this I may miss your message.
Redbubble - please contact Redbubble customer service. I don’t produce any of the products in my Redbubble store, only the designs.
Shopify - please use the Contact form or reply to your order confirmation email.
Etsy - please message me via Etsy Messages.
Stockists - please contact the stockist via their “Contact Us” page or email. I don’t handle fulfillment for these storefronts, they handle it for me.
Can I reserve items from your shop to purchase later?
No, I do not take requests to reserve items.
Do you take commissions?
Not at the moment, but you can check here or my newsletter or social media for updates in the future.
What program/tablet/brushes do you use?
I use Clip Studio Paint. I highly recommend it for any digital artist, it’s well worth the price and it goes on sale often.
For pin lineart I use G-pen on a vector layer, with the stabilization really high, like 30 or so. Lately I've been really loving the Textured Pen with stabilization 0-8 for everything else.
My tablet of choice is the Wacom Intuos.
Can you add X to your Redbubble shop?
Sure, feel free to send an ask or message me with your request.
X is sold out, will you be restocking it?
If an item has just sold out in my shop, wait a day or so and if I have any extras I will update the listing. You can also message me on the shop platform to inquire about any extras.
Next, please check my stockists (above) to see if the item you want is available with any of them. Many older designs are available through these retailers.
Etsy and Shopify do not alert me if variations of an item are sold out, so feel free to message me there to inquire if more are available.
If a pin has sold out: if I have any seconds of that pin I may make a separate listing for those sometime after the standards sell out.
If an item is completely sold out, my new policy is no restocks. However if a design is popular enough, I will consider a new variant of it.
If you really want something restocked, you may submit a restock request here. You may also suggest pin variants at this link. You can find a catalog of all the pins I have made or produced here.
Do you have X guest artist item?
If you are looking for a guest artist item I have produced, please message the guest artist to inquire about the item. Once I send the items to the guest artist, they are out of my hands forevermore!
Will you send X to your stockists?
Probably! Unless I don't have enough inventory, I am planning to send a few of every item including new pins to each of my stockists going forward. You may have to wait a few months while the items are sent and the listings are prepared, but rest assured you'll see most things available with my stockists eventually.
I want to purchase a charity pin from one of your stockists, will that count towards the donation amount?
No, only pins I sell directly through Etsy or Shopify count towards the donation. This is because I can only track the number of pins sold on Etsy and Shopify; and my stockists take a large cut of the profits. If you like the designs I hope that's enough to purchase them from my stockists, but if you wanted to donate through them I'd recommend doing that directly yourself.
When does your shop update?
Once a month, usually the first week of the month but sometimes later. When an update is live I’ll make a post about it. You can follow the shop newsletter or favorite my shop on Etsy be notified as well.
Seraphim, cherubim, and ophanim are plural, not singular.
Thank you for thinking of me and letting me know! I get this correction a lot. You may have seen some older pieces mislabeled in this way. Rest assured, I have been keeping this in mind going forward.
Your “biblically accurate” angels are not biblically accurate!
That’s just a tag I use. All my work is based on my original characters or artistic interpretations of favorite mythology, including angelology. If you are looking for accurate or informative depictions, I would recommend consulting with academic sources.
I want to make enamel pins too! How do I get started?
When I started out I followed this amazing guide by Pinlord. You can also watch this video by Mualcaina. And I recommend you join Pin Maker Resource on Facebook. The group is open for applications the first week of every month.
What manufacturer do you use for X?
You can view my manufacturer for each product on that product’s page. For pins I use a few different ones which I prefer to keep confidential for now, while I am working on writing up comprehensive reviews for them. But in the meantime you can find my reviews and more by joining Pin Maker Resource.
What is your pin grading policy?
I sell pins as "standard" or "seconds" grade.
Standard grade pins may have one or two tiny imperfections. These would be considered A grade. My general rule is, if a pin can be held at half-arm's length and I cannot see the flaw, it is considered small enough for standard grade. Pins are handmade products so please do not expect a flawless item.
Seconds grade pins have more noticeable flaws, including but not limited to: smudges, specks or bubbles in the enamel, under-filled or over-filled enamel, chips or dents in metal and metal-plating, heavy tarnish, missing or mis-colored enamel, loose pin posts, fused metal, missing metal, missing varnish, uneven linework, bends, and/or scratches. Moving pins that are tough to move are considered seconds grade: for example, a spinning pin with a spinner component that does not spin freely. Seconds pins may not come with backing cards. These pins would be considered B/C grade.
I do not sell or guarantee collector's grade (S grade) pins! Do not purchase from me if you would not be satisfied with an A grade pin.
My stockists may sell mixed grade pins for certain listings: a mix of standard and seconds grade, so A/B/C grade. Or they may sell only seconds grade pins. Please read the listing descriptions carefully.
Rainbow anodized plating is unique for every pin - no two are alike with differing metal colors. The plating may appear different than the example images shown in the listing.
Anodized and chrome plating is unique for every pin. Texture and variation in plating should be expected. The plating may appear slightly different than the example images shown in the listing, for example it may be slightly lighter or darker. White enamel on this plating may be tinted, this will not be considered a flaw.
Soft enamel with epoxy pins may have minor blemishes, bubbles, or specks in the epoxy. Small areas may not have epoxy. The surface may have variation, texture, or bumps, unlike hard enamel. There may be bits of glitter in non-glitter portions of the pin. Transparent enamel may also have these traits. Since these are unavoidable they will not be considered flaws for the purposes of grading. Epoxy overflow will not be considered a flaw as well since this is also unavoidable in some cases.
Certain plating is prone to tarnish, especially copper, silver, and rose gold plating. I will try my best to sort heavily-tarnished pins as seconds grade, but please note some tarnish may be unavoidable or develop over time if the pin is exposed to moisture and in these cases will be considered standard grade. This tarnish can be removed by gentle polishing with a jewelry cloth.
What is Angeltober or Ultrangeltober?
It is my annual October art challenge themed after angels. You can find the prompts here: 2021, 2022, 2023
Feel free to follow along with your own creations! They do not have to be angels or angel-themed, the prompts are simply here to inspire you to create - there are no rules. You can pick and choose the prompts you like and do whatever you want with them. If you post your work I’d love to be tagged to see it: 
@ultrainfinitepit​ here on Tumblr
ultra.infinite on Instagram
ultra_infinite on Twitter
Can I make merch using my Angeltober pieces or otherwise profit off them?
Of course! Your art is your own, the prompts are just there to inspire you. You are welcome to credit my prompt list but it's not required.
What is Town of Puddle?
It is my original character universe. I am slowly writing up some updated posts about it, you can find those here.
257 notes · View notes
Text
The Rise Of Glory.
Chapter One. || Loose lips sink ships.
Thursday, November 5th, 2024.
New York.
The grey pavements of New York have barely managed to dry from the morning rainfall that has left the town damp and lingering with a gloomy feeling. I personally feel as though this gloomy greyness will never pass. It has been raining non-stop for the last week, but deep down I feel like it has been raining for months, the flowers inside me have drowned and wilted. When flowers receive too much water, it doesn’t cleanse them or revitalises them, instead, when the soil is constantly wet, there aren’t enough air pockets for the flowers to breathe. That’s exactly how I have begun to feel—  my air pockets are filling with everything falling apart around me— and I'm slowly becoming suffocated within my own self.
As I walk along the cracked, and busy sidewalks, I notice how everyone is busy and hurrying around on this early, gloomy morning. I don't blame them, I would be bustling across the pavement too if it wasn't for an almost-three-year-old on my hip, “love? You there?” Harry’s voice echoes through the phone and I draw myself back to the conversation we were just having.
“Yeah, jus’ thinking about how I forgot to turn the washer on.” 
“I did it when I left,” Harry responds, picking up the slack for me this morning. 
This morning hasn't been the easiest, from the moment Alex woke up, Alex has been whiny and clingy, not allowing me to leave his sight for a second. With breakfast, I couldn't leave him with Harry to finish reading through the daily report from yesterday, and sending out the emails for the day-to-day operations for the next few days. Managing numerous branches of the business definitely keeps me occupied and keeps my mind running at a high speed. Sometimes, I wish it would stop. 
“Surprised you know how to use the thing. Been a while, hasn’t it?” I softly banter with Harry. It is nice to be playful sometimes, our lives consist of being structured and CEO oriented and sometimes we forget to just banter. 
“Oi, be nice,” Harry chuckles, “though, you aren’t wrong. Just been busy, I’ll do better.” 
“I’m joking,” I roll my eyes, even though he can’t see me do so. 
Here’s the thing with how Harry and I work when it comes to household chores. We pick up each other’s slack and nothing is entirely assigned to me besides the grocery shopping, he hates the grocery store with a passion. Harry usually does his best with the household, if he sees the laundry in the basket he will fold and put them away and, he does a lot more of the cooking dinner than I do– when he’s cooking dinner, I’m usually chasing Alex around to get him washed up for supper. 
Harry chuckles on the other end of the phone, “it is alright, love. I hope you know you're late, by the way," Harry says and I can almost hear the grin to his tone of voice. 
I heavily sigh and I bounce Alex, “supervising marketing efforts can wait an extra five minutes, I needed my second tea for the morning and I needed to check on Meyer Enterprise without your new team interrupting my phone calls," I murmur bitterly. Harry’s New York team aren’t as independent as London’s, I have to oversee every damn thing they do, and I don’t get a minute in my office alone because there is always someone needing my help or needing to pick my brains. Teaching a new set of staff on how to run things our way is more time consuming than I had expected. Making a phone call in private is nearly impossible, hence why I had to do it on my morning tea run.   
"Three strikes and you're out." 
"Damn, is the CEO going to fire me?" I chuckle but my chuckle fades to grey and I feel a sudden lump in my throat.
I stop in my tracks as flashes begin to go off in my direction. I stare at the group of unknown individuals in front of me with doe eyes, unaware of what to do. “Uh… Harry,” I clear my throat, “are you aware there’s a mob of people outside the building?” I challenge, settling my phone between my ear and my shoulder while I caress my hand to Alex's back, keeping him safe and secure. 
“What?” 
“There’s a mob of paparazzi,” I inform him, noticing them circling around me and taking pictures before they’re blurting out one-hundred various questions that I can’t even make out, “damnit, there goes my tea,” I mutter as the warm cup slips from grasp as I accidentally bump arms with one of the reporters. Personal space isn’t worth much apparently.  “Harry, can you come and help me?” I question as the phone line seems dead while I am swarmed by vultures trying to get their first meal off of young prey.
I try to keep myself composed as the swarm only seems to pull me further into their hole. 
They’re like a riptide, they swirl around you and then suck you under for their own benefit when you’re at your weakest. For a moment, I feel as though my world is spinning at a fast pace that I can’t keep up with, everything is weighing on my shoulders; questions are being thrown at me erratically, and I can’t manage to catch a breath. 
The crowd around me is relentless and have no intentions of giving me a second to compose myself. 
Without much warning, the mass destruction of the riptide parts like the Red Sea, and Niall emerges in front of me, “you okay? Are you hurt?” Niall questions, placing his hands on either side of my arms and looking me up and down and hiding Alexander from the cameras. 
I’m fine— well, I’m not fine— but I will be fine… eventually. 
I nod, losing my voice within the commotion of voices still yelling and taking pictures. Before I can blink, the swarm of unwanted guests splits and Harry battles his way through the melee with such ease. "I've got him," Harry takes Alex from my arms. I look at Harry, expecting answers but I’m left with nothing as he looks towards Niall with his sharp eyes. 
“Bloody morons, come on, gotta get you inside,” Niall murmurs as he places an arm around me and settles his other arm out in front of him to once again part the crowd and drive his way through with Harry behind us, “give a lady some space, damn. That how you treat all women? Disgrace yeh all are,” Niall shakes his head, making sure his voice is powerful enough for at least a few people to hear. 
Niall gets me into the building without a scratch, and the moment the glass doors trimmed with Gold close behind us, I breathe a breath of relief. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?–“ Harry begins to fret and I cut him off gently. 
“I’m fine, just fine,” I assure him as he shakes his head and bounces Alex in his arms who is evidently shaken up by the whole ordeal. 
I can tell by the way his eyes are a bright green and not grey that he has been crying, and if that isn’t enough to prove it, the red cheeks and the puffy redness under his eyes are. 
My heart sinks at the concern laced within Alex's eyes. He didn’t sign up for this.
Harry hands Alex to Niall and wastes no time with pulling me into him, “I’m sorry, you sure you’re fine?” He whispers while he rubs soothing circles on my back and I inhale his sweet scent. Unfortunately, no amount of soothing back rubs and his sweet scent is going to make things better. 
I lift my head away from his body and gaze up at him. 
I view into his enchanting, clay-grey eyes that are broad with concern, but his concern isn't enough to make me feel better about the situation and what is occurring. “I’m okay. What’s going on? They can’t be out there and do that… surely they can't do this when we have Alex. Isn't it illegal? Where the hell is your security and PR team?" I shake my head disapprovingly, gesturing my arms towards the glass doors that are crowded with the media that are still taking pictures. "Call a meeting with your PR team, now," my voice comes off as harsh and assertive, something I hadn't exactly intended. I don't usually tell Harry what he NEEDS to do, but in this case, it is either he calls the meeting or I will do it myself. 
"I don't know what's going on, I called Tara, she didn't answer." 
I raise a brow and bite the inside of my cheek before I speak, "well, either you get ahold of her and there is a meeting or we need to find a new PR team, the PR team in London would never have allowed this. Your security is a little late to the party, don't you think?" I question, noticing three men making their way towards us. 
"Are you going on a firing spree?" Harry cocks his head to the side with a small smile dangling in the corner of his lips. 
Ever since we moved to New York, three months ago, I have had very little luck with finding the right staff, it has been one hell of a roller coaster. 
"I'm not amused, now if you don't mind, I will be waiting for Tara upstairs, unless of course, I am going to be swarmed?" I sarcastically question, stepping away from Harry and opening my arms for Niall to hand me, Alex. 
✿ ✿ ✿
I stare out the office window, glancing down at the view below me, my eyes following Alex’s as he takes in everything he can see in his view. For some reason, Alex has always been fascinated with the views of the offices’— I can thank Harry for that. While in London, Harry would sneak in extra ‘Daddy’ time and bring Alex into the office with him early in the morning. Harry would stand at the window of his office, with Alex cradled in his favourite blanket and Harry would watch the sunrise with him nestled in his arms. 
There have been countless times during the night when Alex wouldn’t fall back asleep, so Harry would drive around aimlessly, and when driving around town wouldn’t calm Alex, Harry would end up at the company where he would hold Alex while observing the darkened city below. Neither of us knows what it is about the view or if it is just something Alex grew accustomed to as a baby, but it has always been Alex’s thing. I still remember the moment Alex was able to crawl, if we ever put him down in the office, he would make his way to the window and watch the city.
I turn around the moment I hear the door creak open and Harry gives me a small smile, “has he finally settled?” Harry softly asks as he looks at the two of us.
“A bit,” I nod, observing as Harry closes the door behind him and shoves his hands in his pockets. 
He looks defeated. 
He isn’t standing high and tall like the CEO I know him to be, he is standing with a grim expression and lost eyes.
“When did Niall get here?” I softly ask, unsure of whether I want to ask Harry what the problem is or if I want to beat around the bush. 
“He landed an hour ago, he and Charles are talking to a client on their business idea, hopefully, the pitch works for them, it’ll be good for Charles,” Harry responds, “but they only have today, they fly back to London tomorrow. We shall see how that all works out,” Harry adds with a heavy sigh.
“What’s wrong?” I challenge, struggling to overlook the defeated expression in a man that always stands tall.
Harry takes a moment and looks between me and the iPad in his hand, “this doesn’t look good, not even goin’ to lie.” 
“Are the stocks down again? Is the business in London down?” 
Harry shakes his head, “I think I would rather have the stocks down and lose money than to have this,” Harry sighs as he holds up his iPad before placing it on the table, gesturing for me to sit down and take a look. I step closer to the table and Alex holds his arms out towards his father, “come here, mate, Daddy needs some extra cuddles,” Harry smiles, taking his son and engulfing him with tight hugs and kisses while I sit down. 
I push the cover flap to the left to expose the iPad screen from the case, I swipe on the screen and enter the code before the page Harry was looking at pops up in front of me. 
The title alone is enough to make my heart sink and my stomach to turn into knots. 
CEO Harry Styles; the aggressive businessman.
❝ The current CEO of Styles & Co has branched out overseas and made wise decisions in stock profits but not so much when it comes to his fists. 
A new report alleges that Harry Styles isn’t who we think he is. An anonymous source has revealed gruelling details about how the CEO has a dark side to him. Back in 2020, Harry Styles was involved in an altercation that led the victim almost lifeless. The dispute occurred late one night after Styles attended a business event for charity. He was spotted leaving the event without his soon to be wife at the time, Elise Cartier. Not long after leaving her at the event, he drove across town to meet Charles Taylor, who was meant to be out heading towards the airport at ten-fifteen to catch the next flight out of London. Instead of catching his flight, he found himself at the ragged end of his brother’s fist. Yes, brother. Harry Styles may be a CEO and a family man when in the prying eye of the public, but behind closed doors, he is the type of man who pounds his brother until he is black and blue. 
Since his attacking debut with Charles, Harry Styles has reportedly become one of his companies most feared— and his own employers don’t want to work with him, they’re terrified every time he turns down a pitching idea for the company. His London team are mostly transferring to his business located in New York to get away from the monster who intends to stay in London.❞
I glance up at Harry as he sways from side to side with Alex, keeping him relaxed and tranquil, “Harry,” I begin, swallowing hard as my mind attempts to think of something positive and uplifting to say. Granted, finding a positive outcome in things has been gravely hard for me lately. “It’s false media propaganda. Don’t let it get to you.” 
“That would be easier if the media wasn’t outside of the building asking questions and if clients weren’t questioning whether to pull out. They now think I am some threatening man who punches people.” … “I’m not that person, Elle. I don’t-" Harry breathes and looks up at the ceiling to catch a moment to breathe. 
"We will figure it out, we always do," I assure Harry and I stand to my feet. Harry and I have overcome more obstacles in the last ten years than I can think of, there has been nothing we haven't managed to overcome together. This issue will be no different. 
“This is going to mess with my new staff, they’re going to think it’s true, this will compromise the business here and in London. The investors, here in New York, are going to start pulling out once the news travels.”
I wander towards Harry and I lean up and kiss his flushed cheek, "it will be fine, we will figure it out," I assure Harry with a small smile. Before he can reply, or I can speak any further on what is going on, we are interrupted by Charles and Tara walking in. 
I suspected Harry's silver-grey eyes to narrow down on his brother and for there to be some sort of cynical energy between them. But there isn't. There isn't any sort of resentment or blame between the two of them. I can't help but wonder if Harry doesn't think Charles could have been the anonymous source or maybe Harry knows he is and he isn't going to act upon it. 
We give and receive a few swift greetings and I take a seat while Harry continues to stand with Alex. "Let's get this out of the way, what is going on? Why are these things getting published? Surely you can tackle these and get them taken off the internet?" I straight out challenge Tara, "your job is to maintain a positive reputation and to maintain a strategic relationship with the public, prospective customers, partners, investors, employees and other stakeholders... That isn't happening. This one article is compromising his reputation so easily. How is that possible?" 
Tara nods her head, "Elise, this was unexpected, none of us could have known it would be released. I can not control what is written on the internet; what I can control is how we react to this." 
"So we do a press release?" Harry interjects, "what the hell am I meant to say, 'thank you for your false words but I am not a maniac who beats the shit out of people?' granted it was deserved, he was involved in the scandals," Harry grumbles and glances his eyes towards his brother. 
My eyes grow wide at Harry's comment and I can't help but scold him, "Harry, that is not appropriate right now." Clearly, he still hasn’t learned sometimes he needs to keep his damn comments to himself.
"Yeah, try not to tell the press, Harry, that it was deserved," Tara sighs, staring between Harry and Charles. 
"It was deserved, Harry didn't do it just because he felt like it. It is nobody's business what went down before we fixed things, and I am willing to make a press release to say that," Charles speaks up, "I'm not the anonymous source, by the way. I know you probably think that, Tara." Charles glances towards Tara, making sure he clears the air. I don’t blame him, he would be the first one to be blamed for something, it isn’t like he has a clean track record, and part of him still has evilness drawn to him. 
"Nobody is making a press release unless it is Harry and written by me. This is what is going to happen, nobody is speaking to the media, do not react negatively, it will make it worse. As for the media outside, they are allowed to be there because it is considered public property where they are standing." ... "I’ll look into making sure pictures of Alex are blurred or taken down.”
“Can we ask them to take the story down? I will pay them for the story rights,” Harry offers but Tara shakes her head. 
“The damage is done, taking it down would only make you look more guilty of the accusations.”
“I am guilty of them. That night isn’t false news,” Harry sighs, his eyes doing their best not to make eye contact with anyone in the room. 
He’s ashamed and embarrassed with what this day has caused. Perhaps, he’s ashamed of who he used to be and the night he became physically violent in the name of love. 
Tara nods, “I know, but if we pay to have the articles taken down, it’ll look like you’re hiding. You have to ride this out, it’s the best option.” 
“It doesn’t seem like the best option when my wife and son are getting swarmed by the media.” 
“They’re not just swarming over this article, they want info on everything, Harry. You’re a few deals away from being the biggest CEO in London, you’re big news, you branched the company to New York in just a few weeks and made it a highly successful branch, that’s rare.” 
Harry shakes his head, “I don’t want to be big news. I want my family safe, and I want my employees safe.” 
Tara nods and briefly looks between Harry and I, “you need some good media attention, is there any good news we can release? Any new investments? Donations? I have spoken to your team in London, they are doing damage control the best they can over there.” 
Harry shakes his head, “the media is all over my business news, they know everything, I couldn’t even keep NYC quiet.” 
“What about family-wise? Is there anything we can use? Your Mum’s organisation? Elise’s father’s business? Her uncle’s?”
“No, there’s nothing new… we aren’t bringing our family into this,” Harry again shakes his head as he continues to bounce Alex in his arms. 
He has never wanted either of our family to mesh into the business. Harry would rather rise in glory and befall in defeat all on his own.
“You need to think of something that’ll shine your name in a better light. What about your sister? Isn’t she a writer?”
“I don’t care, I’ll do charity work, I’ll do a press release, whatever it takes. I’m not bringing family matters into this, no.” Harry shakes his head, refusing to use any good news family-wise to shine him in a better light, “no family is to be brought into this, this includes her family’s businesses, I mean it, Tara.” Harry is assertive with his tone of voice. 
He has never been one to use the family as a step up or a step down within the business. He has always been stubborn and refused to have himself associated with my family business once he branched out from My Uncle, Jamie, and started his own business that is now known as ‘Styles & Co.’
“What about Elise coming back to work? She was on a break for a little, we could use that as a new story to spin.” Tara offers up another suggestion, one of which breaks my heart and takes me back to what I wish I could forget. 
Instantly, Harry shakes his head, “no, her personal leave isn’t a story to spin.” 
“You’re not giving me much to work with here.” 
“As I said, her personal leave isn’t a media story, drop it,” he firmly responds, narrowing his eyes towards her to get his point across. 
Tara nods her head with a slight sigh, “then you need to be on your best behaviour and get in the good graces of the media. There is not much I can do, just… all of you just keep quiet. Loose lips sink ships,” Tara informs all of us and we all agree, “you need to start attending more events and hosting events.” 
“Yes,” Harry nods, “keep in mind that I have a family to care for before I take care of my business, I can’t run off to one-hundred different events,” Harry responds, not too fond of the conversation taking place. 
I don’t blame him, but it isn’t Tara’s fault, she’s trying to do her job. “I have work to do, this meeting is over,” Harry dismisses the meeting and the others in the room, giving nobody the opportunity to challenge him and continue. 
Harry and I are left alone in the meeting room and he closes the door, giving us some privacy. 
Harry gives us a moment of silence, more than likely trying to figure out the thoughts running through his head. Harry looks down at Alex and softly smiles at him, he presses a kiss to his forehead before Harry’s eyes glance over towards me, “are you okay?” Harry asks the same damn question he has been asking for the last few weeks, the same question that keeps getting the same answer.
“I’m fine,” I nod, unsure of who I’m trying to convince more, Harry or myself at this point. 
The definition of fine is not me, but I will do what it takes to make Harry think it is. 
Harry rolls his eyes and takes a breath in an attempt to keep his cool, “so you’ve been saying for the last three months, but it doesn’t feel like you’re fine.” 
“I need to get back to work,” I softly respond, avoiding eye contact with Harry as I stand to my feet. 
“Elise,” Harry stands in front of me and presses his finger under my chin, forcing me to look up at him, “Elle, please don’t push me away.” 
“I’m not,” I bluntly lie. 
I’m not trying to purposely push him away, I’m just trying to avoid things at all costs. It’s hard to look at the man I love, who gives me everything I could ask for, and in return, I am a failure for the one thing he can’t give me, but I can give him. “I have work to do, supervising marketing efforts doesn’t happen on its own, Harry, nor does reviewing the company’s global footprint.”
Harry heavily sighs and his lips purse like he has been chewing a lemon rind, a sign of his distaste and hidden anger that is more than likely building up. If his pursed lips aren’t enough of a sign that he is frustrated and somewhat angry, his enchanting, clay-grey eyes with contracted pupils are a heavy sign. “The global footprint right now is fine, Elle. Are you sure you want to work? You can take as much time off as you need.” Harry knows I am doing my best to avoid the conversation he is trying to initiate, just like he knows I am trying my best to fill up my time the best that I can so I don’t need to think about things. If I don’t have time to myself to allow my emotions and thoughts to run wild, I can’t feel them.
“Well, I need to get on top of the fact that one of your teams is off-budget, so if you don’t mind, I have work to do, I will talk to you later,” I grant him a lacklustre smile, answering his question on whether I need more time off.
I don’t need more time off work, I have had enough time to mope around the damn penthouse that although is filled with all the furniture we desire and luxurious items, it still felt so damn cold and empty. The thought of being alone in the penthouse again makes my skin crawl. No amount of vintage or expensive items makes up for the bitter coldness I feel when I’m alone in the penthouse. 
“I won’t hold my breath on that,” Harry mutters under his breath, his lips set in a grim line while I walk out of the meeting room and lock myself away in my office. 
I stare at the documents piled on my desk, documents that can probably wait another week; I have locked myself in here since I started working again and I am on top of everything. I have used work as an excuse to keep me occupied, and as a way to spend hours on end away from the penthouse. The Penthouse doesn’t feel like home, it doesn’t possess the same warm feelings as our home in London does. I take a breath and I pull at one of the files, determined to keep myself occupied, but I can’t help but replay the scenes of this morning in my head: the mobbing, the questions, the meeting, and Tara and her reminder of my absence of leave. 
My absence of leave was impromptu and it all started on Monday, August the 26th.
115 notes · View notes
junker-town · 7 years
Text
Tiger Woods is now 'Golf Saban' and other things we learned at the USA's Presidents Cup win
The 2017 Presidents Cup was another uncompetitive bore but it wasn't completely uninteresting. Some observations beyond just the golf shots and match results.
You've already digested a full meal of content on how uncompetitive the 2017 Presidents Cup was and how this American team was one of the best ever and just getting started on what could be a decade of dominance. While the competition was a bore, watching the U.S. team light it up, really from the top of the roster to the bottom, was impressive and worth watching.
We don't need to re-hash all the specifics of a lopsided four-day match play event, but here are some notes beyond the actual golf shots and matches that I gathered from a few days at Liberty National.
These matches feel different with Tiger roaming
Watching Tiger was the most enjoyable and entertaining part of the Presidents Cup. If I'm being honest, I probably never appropriately appreciated watching Tiger play when we had him at his peak. I was younger, dumber, and could not put things in context all that well. Now with him mostly out of public view in the sport, the rare occasions where he does pop up seem so special and carry a certain weight. And that includes when he never swings a damn club.
In all contexts, it was a entertaining to watch him and listen to him and just see him.
It's fun to see all our shitty little jokes on the fantasies of Tiger leading SEAL missions in some remote corner of the globe looking a little closer to reality with him marching the course wired up with comms line earpieces and carrying a TrackMan briefcase that could be some sort of mobile command unit. This will never not be funny or get old.
It's cool to see him become this sherpa guide to what is clearly a superpower of a 20-something group of players coming up in these events. Tiger has likely the greatest golf brain in the history of the game, and has to feel less threatened leaking some of that brilliance to players who can't use it against him in his prime. On Saturday, I called him Golf Saban: he's got the best 'croots, puts in an obsessive attention to every single detail, has no real time for all the media and promotional nonsense that comes with these exhibitions, and is the driving captaincy force behind what is now two straight methodical blowouts (and even mixed it up with an official after what he thought was a bad call). We already knew "process" was one of his go-to words and from all accounts, the way he prepared the team and himself as a captain for last year's Ryder Cup was nonpareil. The way he threw himself into the role was a motivating and contributing factor to the team's success at Hazeltine, and that appeared to be the case again this year. Process and preparation.
He seems to love it too -- US captain Steve Stricker hinted that Tiger was getting as much out of it as the team, telling the New York Times, "This is a two-way street." Tiger having a real purpose in this game, both for him and us, is something we need for the next 20, 30, or 40 years.
It's moving to see him celebrate with colleagues and competitors, so many of whom he was often trying to destroy on the golf course. We're thinking mostly of Phil Mickelson here, with whom Tiger had a ... we'll use ... contentious relationship. Tiger did not have a particularly strong desire to be friends with anyone on Tour, but especially someone hailed as a potential all-time great. Phil played a role in the two being frosty at times too. Now we're in the sunset of both careers, and the two seem legitimately happy to be paired up as the brain trust reformatting how American team golf is organized and outfitted for the next decade or two. I don't care if this is soft as hell, but it's moving giving all the history and scar tissue we have with these guys and they have with themselves.
I'll take "Things I never thought we'd see" for $500, Alex. #PresidentsCup http://pic.twitter.com/dcJiRs9xrZ
— Golf Channel (@GolfChannel) October 1, 2017
Tiger Woods fist pump for Phil Mickelson at President’s Cup http://pic.twitter.com/DZvpTfXHLa
— Tiger Woods Fans (@TigerQuestfor19) September 29, 2017
A business convention
The location, a short ferry ride from Wall Street, may have had something to do with it. But walking around Liberty National was an entirely different experience from the Ryder Cup, and really any major championship or golf tournament I've been to.
This felt like more like a convention for "important looking" people to entertain each other or network about "important" things. The amount of finely pressed slacks and button-down shirts exceeded anything I've seen at any other golf tournament. The point felt more like an arena for corporate schmoozing and the attendant golf event was simply an outlet to congregate and for it to happen at this place.
With that kind of vibe permeating the grounds, it's hard to hype the crowds as having some sort of impact in a way we might thought when it was announced this was coming to New York. That kind of scene may be reserved for Bethpage and the 2024 Ryder Cup. The first tee scene was fun, but the crowds tapered off throughout the course. It may have just been the difficulty of navigating this particular venue. But at the Ryder Cup, every match is five to 10 deep along the ropes. Here, that happened maybe around just one or two marquee matches, and sometimes not even at those bigger matches.
When Justin Thomas holed out from the bunker at the 14th on Friday afternoon, he exhorted the crowd to get into it and the response felt, to be honest, subdued. The 14th hole this week, which is the 18th during normal club play, was supposed to be the highlight hole, an arena running up into the clubhouse with captivating views. But the hospitality suites lining the hole and surrounding the green just muted the atmosphere a bit and the response to Thomas' hole-out was a bit flat.
Have. A. Day. @JustinThomas34 from the sand to the bottom of the cup #PresidentsCup http://pic.twitter.com/YjdxMgNU9O
— Golf Channel (@GolfChannel) September 29, 2017
There were crescendoes here and there, but that flatness existed across the course in my observation.
The Ryder Cup certainly has a corporate schmoozing element to it too, with brand partners and hospitality on the course. But it also has the massive livewire crowds and grandstands enveloping each match. The Prez cup was not that and this is, of course, fine. The purpose of the Presidents Cup can be more business-centered, and it doesn't have to be a same as the Ryder Cup. Just don't oblige the hype about the "rowdy NYC crowds" making this unlike any scene in golf. Maybe that changes in Australia in 2019 or Charlotte in 2021.
Epcot National
Again, critiquing or praising the venue of Liberty National needs to be done with an understanding of this event's purpose. The cup is a largely made-for-TV exhibition and this course was great for TV. You saw the hundreds of pictures and videos all week already, but I really cannot overstate how stunning the vista is from Liberty National.
As a course, it felt inauthentic. One colleague compared it to Disney World and there was definitely an amusement park, albeit an extremely high-class one, feel to it. This was a dump that they filled up, tarped over, and built an emerald golf course, man-made lakes, and a glistening glass clubhouse on top of for $250 million, among the most expensive courses ever built. There are towering walls of concrete, a din of sirens, shipping and truck fumes, and then there's a lush green shade of a perfectly manicured golf course. Nothing about this feels like it was cut and shaped out of the natural land provided and that's how you end up with the inauthentic feel.
It worked just fine for match play, although I'd argue there's way too much water on the course. Red paint hazard lines are running everywhere and indeed, there were stretches were it felt like every other highlight on the broadcast was of a world-class player dumping one in the drink. There were some complaints about the routing leaving us with two par-3s in the final three holes, but I thought that added a funky element I didn't mind.
Photo by Elsa/Getty Images
The views of the Statue of Liberty and downtown Manhattan cannot be oversold.
Again, this comes back to the purpose of this thing — it's not the Walker Cup at a classic LACC. It's big business and TV entertainment. The views were inspiring and stunning and I think the course worked fine for these purposes.
Irreconcilable differences?
The tones of the winning and losing press conferences at these team events are always so fascinating to watch. Press conferences usually don't matter in golf, but they're entertaining and enlightening at these match play contests. Aside from the usual lighthearted partying in the USA winner's press conference (gasp, even Jordan Spieth cursed!), I thought the most notable aspect was the contrast in captain's comments on just where this event may be going.
First came Ernie Els, a veteran of these events, assistant captain this year, and rumored to be the next head captain of the International team in 2019 at Royal Melbourne. On multiple occasions, Els used the phrase "going back to the drawing board" with the PGA Tour. It's clear the International side does not feel like the current arrangement, in which the PGA Tour owns and operates the entire event, is setting up most equitably for them. "We just want to feel that we are being treated fairly and that we get something going our way a little bit," Els said.
We heard repeated refrains about how the Internationals feel they're at a disadvantage not getting to play every year, or less often, as the American team. They also want more control from the PGA Tour, and Els cited scheduling, golf course setup, and team selection process as areas where that could be taken.
The Big Easy also specifically cited "less matches and less points" as something that would be beneficial to the International side — the thinking goes that less points and less matches mitigates the International side's lack of depth compared to the USA.
This is where the contrast between captain's press conferences seemed most stark. The usually understated and diplomatic Stricker was pretty direct when asked if there should be format changes or points reduced.
No, we had the format change for South Korea, and I don't know how many points that we needed to reduce, but I think it's fair. I mean, we weren't really too happy with the reduction of points to start with. We wanted an event that kind of allowed all our players to go out there and play.
So yeah, I don't see anything changing.
Stricker added that they all voted against the reduction in Korea, "and the points system was still changed — ultimately, it doesn't seem like it would be up to us."
So it would appear that after this last blowout, we're headed for a showdown over the rules and format. It again puts the entire viability of the competition on trial, how it's run, and who runs it.
The Fanatics
It's great to have an International voice and superfan group involved in this thing, from Columbus to Korea to NYC. But I have serious questions about who is backing and underwriting this operation. Are you telling me this group spends thousands of dollars to travel the globe every two years to watch their team get its ass kicked? It seems like the people investigating George Soros paid protesters should spend their time digging into the Fanatics' operation.
I think they're a nice element to the competition and creative with their chants, but I need to know more of the why and how behind it.
Photo by Sam Greenwood/Getty Images
A subsection of The Fanatics cohort watches their beloved International team at the Presidents Cup in Jersey.
Phil's brutal honesty
Standing on the green immediately following another Sunday singles match win, Phil Mickelson let loose this howitzer of a quote.
We have a dynamic here that is different than I've seen, and that is these young guys are not only great players, fiercely competitive, but they have a quality that's taken me decades to acquire, and that is they are genuinely happy for each other's success.
Piggybacking for the Phil-Tiger observations from above, I think that sheds light on why the USA struggled for so many years in the Ryder Cup and why they seem set up so well for the future now.
Creating a new identity
The blowout reignited all the takes about how the Presidents Cup is a useless competition and I've certainly hit some of the issues with it in the notes above. Maybe being on the ground up close for a couple days imbued me with some empathy I didn't know I had, but the PGA Tour does bust its ass at this thing and is hustling to make it as strong as possible (there are, of course, motivating economic interests too!).
I think it would be stupid to do away with it or completely overhaul it. Team golf is the best — this is an incontrovertible fact. Make some tweaks, give more power to a home team, figure out a temporary way to make it more competitive. The lack of International depth is always cited as the reason why it's not competitive, but their best players have not played well either at many of these, including this year with Hideki Matsuyama and Jason Day. This core group of USA 20-somethings looks dominant, but there will be a swing when the Internationals have a run.
The PGA Tour carving out an identity that's more than "not the one that's as good as the Ryder Cup" may be the biggest Prez Cup task. The Tour has done this really well with The Players, an event that now has the self-confidence beyond trying to force an identity as the "fifth major" into something that occupies its own totally unique space in the game. Maybe it means some format tweaks, or schedule tweaks, or qualification tweaks. But even after this past blowout, I'm hopeful there is a future for the Presidents Cup.
0 notes