#(—we had a very thoughtful discussion on whether or not bill cipher has a piss kink)

[ckret2]

Can Bill tell Soos anything about Soos's father just to piss off Abuelita? After all, he likes to piss.

Axolotl, I hope this joke isn't too stupid.

Anon, I am eyeing you with the deepest suspicion.

Anyway—

Bill can tell Soos tons about his father.

Bill would never piss off Abuelita.

After Mabel, Abuelita is the one person in the house Bill least wants to piss off. His first full day in the shack, she tried to poison him with a genial, inscrutable calm; and remained genially inscrutably calm when he called her out on it. That's a stone-cold killer. She wasn't afraid to try to kill Bill Cipher and she wasn't afraid when she was caught trying to kill Bill Cipher. He respects her and slightly fears her. So far, she's the only human who's outright tried to kill him since his reincarnation, and he feels there's very little keeping her from trying again.

If that weren't a concern though, he might occasionally make jabs about Soos's dad to him—and why stop there, his mom is a sore spot too—not to piss off Abuelita but just to bully Soos.

#(explanation: earlier today in one of the servers I'm in—) #(—in the tradition of weird ass 'how did we get here' discord conversations you only get when 3 to 7 pals egg each other into going insane— #(—we had a very thoughtful discussion on whether or not bill cipher has a piss kink) #(so anon—if you AREN'T from that server—then you've sure got some suspicious timing.) #(anyway before anyone asks:) #(my stance is that piss is so foreign to his existence that bill barely recognizes it as distinct from any other Earthly bodily fluid.) #(it neither fascinates nor disgusts him; and therefore isn't interesting enough for him to single it out for eroticization) #(aren't you glad you read the tags) #anonymous #ask #about my writing #bill goldilocks cipher