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I always get confused by people who think that they have no personality behind the mask.

The problem is the stress and anxiety that masking causes. The weight of Pretending at all times. It’s prioritizing the feelings and opinions of others over your own that is the issue.

Behind the mask and running the mask is still You. You can only ever be yourself. If you dress up as Santa Claus, you’re still You. You’re going to do it differently than anyone else, add your own flair, bring your own vibe.

The trouble is that we can never truly SEE ourselves. We see reflections, reactions, and our perception is biased by our own internal dialogue.

And then comes the struggle of communicating this amorphous and ever changing personality. There may be through lines of behavior but also special circumstances can bring out the best/worst in all of us. And life is FULL of special circumstances.

So what if you show a different aspect of your personality with different friends? Radios play different stations and songs which adds variety.

So what if you mimic tv shows or friends or famous people? A quilt is made up of pieces of fabric and yet makes a cohesive and unique whole.

So what if you find the words to describe yourself? I can think of hundreds of words to describe the sun and yet never capture the experience of its light. (Truly a rose by any other name would still smell as sweet.)

Let yourself BE even if that means copying others or acting like your neurodivergence or illness or doing nothing at all. Your personality is still in there even if you don’t see it.

#neurodiverse things #neurodivergency #neurodivergent #personality #sadgirl #you can only ever be yourself

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I have that uncomfortable feeling of All systems Go! mixed with Full Stop. I am tired but antsy. I’m stuck in neutral reving my engine. Idk what I’m supposed to be doing but I have the sneaking suspicion that I’m not doing it. And I’m tired.

#my bones hurt #my brain is buzzing #sadgirl

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The best thing about time travel or memory loss romances is that you get to see your favorite couple fall in love over and over again. <3

#dawn of the dragon #sadgirl #bl manhwa

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I’m going to unlearn shame *bursts into tears and beats my head against a brick wall*

#sadgirl

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The fun part about traveling the world is you get to meet the same types of people everywhere. Nothing quite like getting smirked at by the bored college student at the convenience store when you get spooked about it being dark outside and then awkwardly spend too long picking out a drink, but this time In Japan!

#sadgirl #travel #traveling

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My parents are going out of town so tomorrow I’m going to drink soy milk and write smut all day.

#sadgirl #fan fic writing

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Look, haha, I don't even want it!

*She did in fact want it, she just had numbed herself to her feelings so hard that she managed to feel nothing at all, and truly people who "do not want it" do not spend all their time "checking" to make sure that they still did not in fact want it*

#sadgirl #bisexual

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I’ll have you know it takes a lot of work to stay this soft!

#i’m a jellybean #sadgirl #the world doesnt just make you tougher

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some loser: humans are innately selfish creatures

my psych book:

#sadgirl

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Sometimes I feel like one of those funky cheeses.

The stronger I get, the more my mom wrinkles her nose at me.

#sadgirl #poetry

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#sadgirl

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Kissing someone is a lot like holding a frog in your hand.

A vulnerable and clammy feeling.

You can feel their heart beating erratically beneath their skin.

And it’s slimy and weird and exhilarating.

And if you take a peek you might frighten them away.

But for a moment, you feel both your hearts beating angst your skin and you revel in the strangeness of their delicate skin against yours.

#sadgirl #frogs and toads #frogs #poetry

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That autistic moment when somebody goes off script and you just freeze and take a screenshot for future introspection.

Anyway, one time I got groceries delivered and was struggling to speak the local language with the guy and switched to English. After a bit if small talk chatting, I told him I was working on learning the local language and the guy put his hand on my head. Like a brotherly, good job you moment. But also, like, he touched my head??? What on earth?? For why???? But also he looked so proud of me????

#autism #sadgirl

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This is how manifesting works for me:

1. I ask the universe for something.

2. I think about it for weeks.

3. I forget about it.

4. The universe takes out its boxing gloves and teaches me a lesson.

#sadgirl #manifesting

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#sadgirl

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The funny thing about being able to tune into people’s emotions and give them the same energy back is that if you want you can do the opposite. Nothing freaks people out more than giving them the opposite response they were expecting. I call it discordant empathy.

Like the opposite of emotional attunement but like malicious.

#sadgirl #like when someone tries to fight you but you’re INTO IT #thank you so much for your evil vibes!!

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I love you with my whole snart. <3

Little Snail, watercolor and gouache

#art #artists on tumblr #watercolor #painting #surrealism #sadgirl