singlegoldendove

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listening to Mulaney bits and boy he didn’t learn from Bowie about not doing interviews on coke like damn

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saw an opinion i disagreed with and didn’t say anything about it. +350XP

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mutuals we’re not pretentious we’re just always right. not our fault

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Every single time I hear someone referring to a Jewish person as ‘white’ another little piece of my soul dies.

As a non-American Jew, the first time I ever heard Jews being referred to as white was when I was a full grown adult watching an American reality show. I FOR REAL thought they were making that shit up in order to generate buzz and get people talking about the controversy! That’s how foreign the notion was to me. Imagine my shock and horror to discover that THIS IS A COMMON MISCONCEPTION IN THE UNITED STATES.

It’s the way that referring to Jews as ‘white’ ERASES white people’s antisemitism, it erases our persecution at the hands of white people, it erases our suffering, it erases the OTHERING that Jews had suffered for CENTURIES from actual white people.

Based on what the skin tone of some Jews in a few places might afford them SO LONG AS NO ONE KNOWS THEY’RE JEWISH.

If you have to hide your real identity in order to enjoy the privileges of being perceived as white, YOU’RE NOT WHITE (this is true for Jews just like it is true for other white-passing People of Color).

White passing is not the same as white.

WHITE PASSING IS NOT THE SAME AS WHITE.

Jews are NOT white. Not a single one of us. Not even the ones who can pass as white, let alone all of the Jews who can’t.

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a song reflective of my thoughts on ~things~

#Youtube

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trying to come up with analogies to reason, to explain. i feel like an old phone battery—the kind that takes hours to charge and runs out thrice as fast. i wake up not at 100 but perhaps at 60 (on a good day) and, unless I rest—meaning: lie still and don’t do a thing—it’ll keep depleting.

today, for instance—what is my final day of uni classes ever (and of which I was able to attend only one)—i woke with perhaps 50, being generous. downstairs, driven to uni, up stairs in the building (no elevators): 45. class and notes and mental work: 40. an errand. some walking: 25. back home, up stairs, lunch: 20. attempt at an assignment, an easy thing, a presentation, 30 minutes of work: 5. Unable to finish it. Rest, three hours, doing nothing: 25. and knocked out for the day. if I try again, well, look at the ratio: 30 minutes of work to three hours of rest (at least), and that’s merely to be semi-demi functional, moving, thinking, processing. this is difficult, no matter what I try to convince myself of.

#personal shit to delete #mapping the aftershocks etc etc

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#me

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source

#the me I write into poems #aesthetic #j’adore

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in bed. all day. why worse today? the two classes yesterday? the stairs I took? the three hours sitting? and today. lying down. headache. dizziness. sweating palms and icy feet. weak, always. unable to brush the cat that came into my room. forget standing, black spots, heart pounding, head spinning. scrolling through twitter in ten minute increments. nothing else.

#personal shit to delete

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i go over the same small sentences again and again. i read them years ago but realise now how little i comprehended. my head aches. my bones feel tired. my gf responds to an email for me from a prof who doesn’t seem to understand that i’m not well enough to write, not well enough to finish a thought, much less a paragraph or whole essay. i go around in circles. energy enough to eat? yes. but an hour later, stilled and exhausted again, and from what? the shadows change. i try to find comfort. it’s a hard, perhaps impossible, task.

#ill and abed #A relapse and here’s to recounting the lost days

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me and the mutuals

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my job is getting in the way of me being a desperate horny lesbian 24/7, i think i'm going to have to quit it

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I love it when an artist puts out a concept album and the concept is that they had a mental breakdown

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Chag Pesach sameach to every Jewish person. No matter your observance practices, whether you’re at a Seder with family, working or anything else. Every Jewish person deserves to feel safe, no matter their politics or visibility. Because right now? It’s beyond left/right. It’s simply being Jewish. So celebrate (or not) with lightness, love and above all, safety. Take care, be proud, chag Pesach sameach!

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it’s insane to me that people are painting the protestors at columbia and yale as “anti-war.” in fact they are very much pro-war! they have cheered for iranian missiles and hamas rockets, shouted “october 7th will be every day” and “burn tel aviv to the ground.” they don’t want the war to end, they just want the side they support to succeed in killing more jews. absent that, they themselves are happy to harass and physically assault local jews that they can get their hands on.

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“Only (softly, fiercely) the stars shining. Here, in the room, the bedroom. Saying I was brave, I resisted, I set myself on fire.”

— Louise Glück, ”Stars,” from The Seven Ages  (via fightculb)

#poetry

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It’s okay if the only thing you achieved today was getting out of bed. It’s also okay if you didn’t get out of bed.