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Dick: Maisie and Caleb invited us to speak at their wedding! Bruce: Hrmn. Dick: This is such an honor! We've known them for so long, our speeches will have to be perfect. I know exactly what I'm going to say! Bruce: ...Do you know what I'm going to say? Dick, rolling his eyes: Relax, I've written yours already. Bruce: *Satisfied* Hrmn.

#dick grayson #nightwing #bruce wayne #batman #brudick if you want #they act like they're married whether you ship them or not #incorrect batfamily quotes

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🤭❤️

#he is a cutie #possessive dick grayson addicts #dick grayson #jason todd #red hood #slade wilson #deathstroke #jaydick #sladick #pretty art!

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Dick: You... You had a crush on me??

Tim, extremely annoyed: It was a long time ago

Dick: It really wasn't-

Tim: I was a kid discovering his sexuality!

Dick: I just wouldn't have expected it to be you

Jason: It was also me

Dick, snapping his head towards the other reading in the corner: WHAT??

#jaydick #timdick #dick grayson #nightwing #tim drake #red robin #jason todd #red hood #everyone’s had a crush on dick #incorrect batfamily quotes

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Dick and Barbara just after getting married:

Dick: Babs you know I love you right?

Barbara: *purring* Ofcourse~ how about…we take this show on the road..hmm?

Dick: Yes…but also about the marriage license-

Barbara: *kissing him* what about it? We can just get it later..

Dick: welll……we don’t realllyy need to get a marriage certificate, right? *laughing awkwardly* isn’t it just enough that everyone important to us knows?

Barbara: *stopping* what.

Dick: uuhhmmm…

Barbara: what. happened.

*flashback to several years ago*

Dick: *drunk off his ass* Jay!! *kissing his face* My baby brother I’m so glad you’re back!!

Jason: me too, Dick…say..why don’t we make it official that I’m back?

Dick: hmm??

Jason: why don’t you officially prove that you’re happy to see me and have me back?

Dick: what do you want?

Jason: what will you give me?

Dick: *beaming and hanging off his shoulders* anything anything!

Jason: *smirking slowly* alright, dickie, ya better keep your promise.

The next morning

Dick: Jason!

Jason: *Holding the marriage certificate that is very much on fire* Can’t return me now!! You’re mine now, Dickface!

Dick: JASON!!

*flashforward to forward to the present with Dick and Barbara*

Dick: uhhhh…nothing…ha…ha…

Barbara:

#jaydick #dickbabs #Jason was about to crash the wedding but then remembered that dick would have to explain why he and Barbara couldn’t get married #so he decided to happily spy on them instead #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #barbara gordon #batgirl #incorrect batfamily quotes #I don’t know how you get the marriage lisence but in this story you get it after lol

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Jason: *to tim* I’ve been having trouble sleeping lately. I guess it’s because of work an’ shit

Tim: *unphased* uh huh.

Dick: *walking in* hey guys, what’s up?

Tim: *sniggering* Jason’s been having trouble sleeping because of work.

Jason: What the fuck are you laughin-

Dick: You’re having trouble sleeping little wing?! Oh no! *opening his arms wide* If you’re having trouble, come sleep with your Big Brother! I’ll take care of ya 💕

Jason who has a mommy kink and a massive big brother complex on Dick: *insanely turned on* fuck…

Tim: *glaring daggers of promised murder and violence at Jason* *whispering* Don’t. You. Dare.

Jason-petty ass-Todd: …you know what dick, I think I’ll take you up on that!

Tim, lunging out of his chair at him: YOU MOTHERFU-

#jaydick #who said Damian is the only one who goes feral to protect his dad/mom/big brother figure? #if they have then they haven’t met the og Damian AKA Tim AKA no one loves dick more that me!boy #tim drake #red robin #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #incorrect batfamily quotes

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поменяла шмотками

#jaydick #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #johnny cage #kenshi takahashi #johnshi #mortal kombat 1

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Jason: *running full speed* Call 911!! Cop!Dick chasing after him: I am 911! Jason: No you're not!

#jaydick #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #meme post #incorrect batfamily quotes

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I know there’s the trope about how special it is when someone who hates everyone falls in love with you but-

There’s something really special about someone whom every single person in the world is in love with - to be in love with you.

#dick grayson #nightwing #I can see why dick’s girlfriends cant let go of him

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Jason: Dick isn’t really Daddy material when it comes to the bedroom but holy Lazarus he’s a really fucking good mommy. Mommy kinks with him are a one way trip to a blackout orgasm.

Tim, forever scarred and knowing he’ll never look at Dick the same way again: I never wanted to know.

#dick definitely plays the mommy in the bedroom #stan Mommy Dick Grayson and Daddy Jason Todd #dick grayson #nightwing #jason todd #red hood #tim drake #red robin #jaydick #does this count as timdick??? maybe Jason awakened an unknown kink in him #incorrect batfamily quotes

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Gannon: Hey Dick how's it going? Dick: Hey Gannon, it's going okay. Things have been pretty busy lately. Gannon: Relationship problems? Dick: Yeah, how did you know? Gannon: I was passing by your place last night and wanted to know if you wanted to eat together but it seemed like you and your lover had a thing going on. Dick: Ugh yeah, me and my boyfriend got into a fight last night about some moral problems and he wouldn't leave. Gannon: Yeah seems like he's got some serious attachment issues. Dick: Tell me about it. He sometimes likes to joke that he didn't have white hair already, then I would've been the reason for it. Gannon: White hair? Dick: ....look I know he might be slightly older than me but- Gannon: So the guy clinging to your window all night wasn't your lover? Dick: Dick: Dick: ...the what?

#possessive dick grayson addicts #bruce wayne #batman #brudick #thomas wayne jr #owldick #they'd both do it honestly #dick grayson #nightwing #slade wilson #deathstroke #sladick #owlman

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Slade: *crashing through the window* Dick: WHAT?!! Slade: I heard your fake father/uncle killed for you. Dick: WHO?! Wait-OWLMAN?! HE'S BACK?!! Slade: *strangling Dick* I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO'S ALLOWED TO KILL FOR YOU! Dick: WHAT THE FUCK?!

#dick your murder husband's jealous #his affection style is skewed #dick grayson #nightwing #slade wilson #deathstroke #sladick #thomas wayne jr #owlman #owldick #incorrect batfamily quotes

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Dick, hissing: I am sick and tired of him. He always shows up out of nowhere and what does he do? Nothing! He’s always just follows me around going ‘Robin, your punch on the right is weak, you aim for the heart.’ ‘Nightwing, your snark is like a rabbit with fangs.’ ‘Little bird, did you just get out of bed because I could take you right now.’ And ‘you’re dripping sweat- Wally: ‘-am I working you too hard?’ Dick: Yes! You understand! Roy: Uh no. No we don’t. It’s all in the “how to flirt with your oblivious fellow hero counterpart” book. Dick: W-what? There’s-what? Raven: yes, it’s quite…collective. Dick: WHO WOULD EVEN WRITE SOMETHING LIKE THAT?! Gar: Dude it’s written by a bunch of thugs and villains. It’s like famous. Even the Joker added stuff to it. Dick: oh my god why would Slade even read that?! Wally: Dick. My buddy. My bro. My ship in friendship. C’mon. Dick: what-it’s not like he’s trying to flirt. Garth: *turning to the group* and this is why there’s "oblivious" in the title. Dick: *flustered* hey! Fine, even if he is, why would he read a "how to romance" book? Roy: Now we’re asking the right questions. Dick, he doesn’t read it. He’s the source of inspiration. Dick: Wha- Roy: A bunch of thugs got tired of seeing him flirting with you and started complaining about it at the villains' bar. One of them got the really dumb or maybe really smart idea to write a self-help book about all the pick up lines Slade’s used on you over the years. Dick: No. Roy: Yup. Dick: No. no. There’s no way. I would’ve noticed. If someone was flirting with me all these years, I would’ve noticed! Wally: Really? Thanks for noticing then. Roy: And not saying anything. Dick: What? Garth: *shoving Roy and Wally* Nothing! Get your butt tootalooting out of here. You have business to catch up on. Dick: *getting shoved out the door and having it slammed shut behind him* I- Raven: That worked out great. Gar: Yeah! Wait no! I thought we didn’t want them together? Garth: Yeah that was the plan. I guess it just slipped out. We have a bigger problem now. Wally: what? Garth: Who’s gonna tell Batman that Dick knows about Slade’s interests now? Roy: Wally: Gar: Raven: Roy, Wally, Garth, and Gar: ICALLNOTIT Roy, Wally, Garth, and Gar:... Wally: Raven? Raven: *Glaring* Wally: Yup, yeah, okay, that’s fine too. Roy: *packing his bow* whatever, I’ve got a suitor to hunt down. Wally: Me too. Gar: I’m gonna hang out with Raven, bye! Gar and Raven: *disappearing* Garth: hey, anyone? Garth: *dragging out the communicator* Why is it always me? Garth: …actually you know what? Fuck Batman. Enjoy your new fresh hell, you possessive fuck. We’re all gonna be in it.

#dick grayson #nightwing #slade wilson #deathstroke #sladick #wally west #the flash #roy harper #arsenal #garth #garfield logan #beast boy #raven #implied birdflash #implied roydick #incorrect batfamily quotes

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Also Dick's latest villain, Heartless!

What is your opinion on Dick Grayson's league of morally ambiguous exes/dangerous middle age harem/harem of morally ambiguous older men?

Lol, oh boy, you guys just keep making my day better :)))

 1. Bruce:

- Can we stop for a moment and appreciate that Broose here is definitely the founder and board member of the whole abnormal middle age club, please?

- Oh Jeez, Bruce. The guy loves Dick, really, he does.

- He just has a paralyzed face, and awkwardly pokes at the surface of human emotions and association with a ten feet pole like a cave man. 

- He favors Dick too much, to the point that everything of his is ready to be Dick’s at any time. Bruce might seem a little bit careless about Dick but no, that is actually just his way of showing how much he trust Dick and his ability to handle things.  

- Dick in his heart is like a part of himself. Like Batman always needs a Robin, a Wayne always needs a Dick Grayson, no matter what generation, or what universe they’re in.

- There’re too much things to say about BruDick to wrap up in this post, so I’m just gonna say that Bruce Wayne can’t live without Dick in his life, and that’s probably the reason why DC never dare to actually kill Dick off.

2. Slade:

- Deathstroke appears in every single DC character’s mind like a Boogie Man. And Dickie spent his childhood fighting him like it was nothing wrong.

- Slade and Dick probably have the most bittersweet relationship ever. I mean, so must trust and respect and understanding between them, they actually care for each other, really.

- But at the end of the day, they’ll still be fighting and betraying each other for a greater purpose. 

- He still sees Dick as someone special and definitely still wonders what the world would be like if they ever stand together

- He will fight and try to kill Dick, he has for countless times. But at the end of the day, if Dick asks, he would do anything.

3. Owlman:

- This guy is sick

- Really, can you crawl back to your universe pls? Dick almost died because of him, while the guy was trying to make him his.

- I mean what the sh*t?? 

- People, just see Thomas as a living example of what Bruce’d be like without Dick Grayson. 

- He’s crazy and psychotic and just sad. 

- Seriously, he just wants his Grayson back. 

4. Raptor:

- He’s like Slade.

- He’s rough, hurt, lonely, dangerous, and has interesting story. Seriously, he’s been a club member even before the writers give us materials to go to that conclusion.   

- He’s hurt when Dick denies him, like Slade went crazy and nuked Bludhaven when he found out Dick betrayed him and taught Rose heroic shits.

- And he’s a stalker too. I mean, he sleeps in the room full of Dick’s pics!

- Even when he goes around with Pigeon (Nightwing 2016 #32-33) the routine goes on. How the heck is your girl ok with this, man??

5. Midnighter:

- He has a boyfriend, the not-Dick boyfriend 

- He’s totally eager to have an openly officially 3P relationship with Appollo and Dick, if allowed.

- He has good eyes. Real good eyes.

- He just downright makes Dick nervous. 

6. Tiger:

- The friendzone not so friendzone relationship

- He just likes to play hard to get, because it suits his character. But seriously, he’s weak for Dick.

- He’s the kind of guy that would go running and screaming “You’re an idiot!”, but would still do Dick’s crazy shit anyway. 

- He’s the Tiger Kind of Kandahar, he’s a top agent and current director of a top-secret operation, he has the movements of Batman, he kills and being badass like eating bread for breakfast. 

- And Dick calls him Tony, and Tig.

- I think he secretly likes the names. 

This club is full of dark, powerful, possessive, strange ass men. What the heck, these people could tear universes apart working with each other, what the hell Dick!!!??

P/S: Blockbuster, Constantine and the whole Court of Owl are waiting on the line, just… someone locks Dick down a basement, please!

#dick's harem of middle aged morally ambiguous older men #dick grayson #nightwing #bruce wayne #batman #thomas wayne jr #owlman #slade wilson #deathstroke #raptor #tiger #midnighter #heartless #brudick #sladick #owldick #dicknighter #tigerdick

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Dick: *bursting into the living room* How could you do this to me! I TRUSTED YOU! Jason: Babe! It's not like that!! Dick: You cheated!! Jason: No! NO! Everything's okay, see? I'll just watch it again with you. Dick: I don't believe you! Jason: *rewinding the show* There-from the beginning. All good! Dick:....humph!

#jaydick #dick grayson #nightwing #jason todd #red hood #incorrect batfamily quotes

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Dick: *beating the crap out of Bruce for what he did to Jason*

Tim: *enjoying and scared* WOAH ARENT YOU A BOTTOM?!

Dick: Yeah I’m a bottom bitch but that baby over there is my sub top and I ain’t letting no body hurt my muffin man.

Tim: *thinking about his Kon and his experiences* same bestie. Now beat his ass harder.

#FACTS #jaydick #achilles and patroclus

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I hope your doing okay!! For the prompt thing number 35? 👉👈 I hope you get well soon mooney!

35: “I’m bonded to someone.”

David was a 30 years old Alpha, born Georgia and currently one year Gotham resident, occupation? Stockbroker. 

He couldn’t say his life was full of pink and rainbow, but he had a nice two-bedroom apartment in Midtown, worked in a fairly large company, and earn himself enough money to live comfortably. 

What bugged him though, was his mom. His mom had been blackmailing him through the phone in the last two weeks asking when he could give her a nice mate. She wanted grandchildren, and what David wanted though, was solace. 

He was comfortable with his life, just like this. Was he lonely? Sometimes. But he was desperate for a mate... until he saw him.

It was a particularly sunny day in Gotham, and David was sitting at his newly found coffee shop. The place made a fine espresso and he always ordered a double. And then he saw him, the only person besides from David took an outdoor seating. 

He was beautiful like a Gustave Caillebotte canvas, theatrical from the curve of his lips, to how his eyes closed when the winds blew.  And when the sun cast down heaven lights, bathing the street and poured gold on his skin, his raven wavy hair; his eyes gleamed of diamonds, Persian blue, deeper than the sea, greater than the sky.

David knew, he just knew, he wanted to make babies with this man. 

He got on his feet so fast, it felt like time had jumped and his memory missed it.

“Excuse me?“

When those eyes met him, every muscle of David trembled. He was even prettier up close. A slender neck, a minimalist style, admirable lashes, and heart-shaped lips colored of cherries. 

This man looked like he had run off a museum where they carved him.

“Yes?”

Oh god, even his soft voice was pretty. He would make a great father to their children.

“I was just sitting there....and I think you’re very beautiful.”

“Um...thank you?”

“Do you mind if I get you a cup of coffee? Anything you want.”

He looked surprised, and to be honest, David wasn’t this bold his entire life. But in his defense, he had never met a divine creature like this man his entire life until now.

“No need for that,” An arm came out of nowhere, pushing David back a few steps. “I’ve already got what he wants.”

...An Alpha.

No, a magnificent Alpha. He was built like a warrior, featured like a commander. There was no need to smell him. Those turquoise eyes conveyed authority under the cover of his white streaks hair from his 6 feet something standing. Shadow shaded on his face, silhouetted his granite features. 

There was soft huff, and the beautiful person David had fallen for at first sight covered his laugh with a hand of pretty fingers, a ring sparked when it hit the light.

Ah, David was an idiot. 

“Sorry,” He smiled softly. “I’m bonded to someone.”

And he turned over, tucked his hair up with his hand and showed David his nape. A moon-shaped bit imprinted on his skin, no longer a wound, but a scar.

“And that someone, is me.” The Alpha grunted, crossing his arms. Again, a ring reflected against the sun, hitting David’s eyes, this time on a different hand.

He was bigger than David, way bigger. David got it, so he backed away, his pride tattered.

“You were brave.” said the receptionist the moment he gave his card for an extra Americano. “That was Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne’s golden boy. The most desired man in this city.”

Bruce Wayne, as in Wayne Enterprises? Their stock is topnotch. 

“The world cried for months when he announced his marriage last year. That Alpha over there, is the owner of biggest neutral territory for underworld big names, the Iceberg Lounge. You really don’t want to give that man any wrong idea...especially about his mate.”

Ah, so that was how it was. David had an idea that person could be someone working on the shady side, and got big. 

So on his way back to the office, he pulled out his phone, called his mom and watched the sun radiant on the sky with the memory of his love at first sight. 

“Mom, you’re never gonna get grandchildren. I’m adopting a cat.”

Love, apparently, was too expensive for him.

#IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS FIC FOR A YEAR #I FINALLY FOUND IT AGAIN IN ITS ENTIRETY AND NOT AS A COLLECTION OF WORDS IN MY HEAD THAT I COULD NEVER FORGOT #love these types of dick fics #jaydick #dick grayson #nightwing #jason todd #red hood

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bruce introducing dick to someone: "and this is my wife/husband/son/daughter/bestfriend/partner/sidekick dick :)"

#they are everything to each other #damn right #brudick #dick grayson #nightwing #bruce wayne #batman #incorrect batfamily quotes