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Jean and Neil devastate me and here’s why

Jean and Neil are a promised pair. In a million ways, they are meant exist as two sides to the same coin, and even in the face of the fact that this promise has been broken, they are too alike for anyone to ever disregard the possibility of what if.

Neil Josten, is nothing. Jean Moreau, is nothing more than what he is.

Neil and Jean are mouthy players with an attitude problem and a debilitating wariness of adult figures. They are French-speaking menaces whose background muzzles them and turns them into liars. They are sold property whose singular source of familial love has been killed by a world of crime that they had no part in. Neil and Jean are young men whose survival instinct have been warped by the abuse they’ve suffered—men who think that their survival is a tenuous, fragile figment that will one day escape them.

Jean and Neil, who encountered the green-eyed boy with the number two on his face and found the will to survive. Who aren’t allowed to look at others that way but who find themselves beholden to a stubborn blond and somehow manage their slow trek out of hell. Jean and Neil, who needed each other to survive during their brief and tumultuous partnership in the Nest. Jean and Neil, who are owned by the same family under a new master, but are learning that the confines of their cage are farther than they’d ever imagined.

You look at them and you think, what would they have been like as a true pairing? We read between the lines to understand their careful and begrudging fraternity, and we take these small moments between them as a way to glimpse into whatever complex knot of connection they’ve amassed between each other.

But Neil was saved by a mother’s love, and Jean had been leashed too tightly to be spared half a decade of despair. Jean and Neil are the picture of what the other could have been, in an alternate life, and in this way, their connection slides into place in an unspoken, irrefutable way.

Jean says, I want to go Home, and Neil, who has learned what Home means to people like them, would evade the cops a little longer, piss off the Moriyamas a little more, if it meant offering Jean that sliver of peace.

There is so much potential between Neil and Jean, but it can never be fully realized. They were both a part of a broken Perfect Court, and it will always be the thing that both binds them and divides them.

#I am now finished with finals and read this immediately. I am rabid over everyone and them especially #I cannot fucking believe this book had me tearing up over sportsman-like conduct in a sport that doesn’t even exist #I don’t even gaf abt sports like that #aftg #the sunshine court #neil josten #jean moreau #all for the game #the foxhole court #jeremy knox #kevin day

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thorn in the latter part of book 2

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Ophelie & Thorn from The Mirror Visitor Quartet ❄️✨

#ophethorn #thorn x ophelie #le passe miroir #the mirror visitor #a winter's promise

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ophélie : *arguing with someone* fight me!

thorn : *behind her, holding a knife*

thorn : *mouthing* don't.

#i am using this page again #i am on the fourth book and obsessed with them #once I read them in English I will read them in French #i don’t care the cost #the mirror visitor #la passe miroir #booklr

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i know it's cringe to like reading young adult now but i cannot in good faith get on the 'all ya is worthless fluff' train when a lot of up and coming ya authors are queer authors, authors of color, and other marginalized voices who Literally just want to give this generation of teens the representation they never got. sure some do it better than others and booktok is a menace where the same ten mediocre books get endlessly circlejerked over but "ya is just ao3 tropes for people who can't handle Real Books" really is not the hot take you think it is (especially since half the books being vagued in those posts aren't even YA)

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Katsa and Po being the Most Extra™ in Bitterblue

ft. Giddon being salty:

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titles i’d like to be called:

feral librarian

impossible menace

proper monster

complete terror

child of the library

unmanageable, contrary creature

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It’s okay to be a beginner at the things you are interested in. There is no reason to feel intimidated by people more advanced than you are, because they too were in your place at one point. Keep learning and growing and expanding in whatever it is that you love and let nothing and no one stop you. You don’t have to be at the same stage as someone else. You can just be at your stage and that one is okay too.

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not a break up fic

On the first day of summer break, Andrew returns to the dorm and says, I want to break up.

Well, his exact words aren’t I want to break up, because they never really use terms that other couples use, like we’re a couple, or we’re dating.

What Andrew says is, I want to put an end to this.

It’s the end of Neil’s first year, a few months after Baltimore, after spring break, after the championship. When Andrew had gone out earlier that day, right before the sun had risen, Neil had gone out for his run. He had returned to the suite, which had been as empty as when he had left, so after taking a shower and eating some apples, he had pulled out the Russian textbook they bought together and studied it.

He is quiet for a while, thinking, staring at Andrew’s unmoving face. In the scalding afternoon light, the planes of Andrew’s face are stark; strong lines that look like they’re drawn in fine ink. His cheeks are a bristling pink against his usually pale skin. It’s because of the heat, Neil knows. Freckles are sprinkled across the bridge of his nose like cinnamon.

If that’s what you want, Neil says, then I’ll go with it. But just know that I don’t want this to end.

Andrew doesn’t say, everything ends, like he once did. Instead, he continues to be silent.

Keep reading

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80 Young Adult Books by Black Authors

Supporting Black authors is something that I definitely need to start doing more, so I’ve compiled a list of 80 YA books by Black authors. I’m putting the ones that I’ve read at the top in bold, and the rest will be books that I have looked up and have put on my list to read. I can’t do much to change what’s going on in our world right now, but I can do my part to support the Black community in any way that I can. These are in no particular order and please feel free to add more!

On The Come Up by Angie Thomas

With the Fire on High by Elizabeth Acevedo

The Poet X by Elizabeth Acevedo

Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi

Calling My Name by Liara Tamani

Dear Martin by Nic Stone

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas

Long Way Down by Jason Reynolds

The Sun is Also a Star by Nicola Yoon

Let’s Talk About Love by Claire Kann

Purple Hibiscus by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Clap When You Land by Elizabeth Acevedo

Allegedly by Tiffany D. Jackson

Odd One Out by Nic Stone

Jackpot by Nic Stone

Dear Justyce by Nic Stone - coming out 9/29/20

Children of Virtue and Vengeance by Tomi Adeyemi

Oh My Gods by Alexandra Sheppard

Black Enough: Stories of Being Young and Black in America edited by Ibi Zoboi

Love Me or Miss Me: Hot Girl, Bad Boy by Dream Jordan

Spin by Lamar Giles

Black Leopard, Red Wolf by Marlon James

Watch Us Rise by Renee Watson and Ellen Hagan

Opposite of Always by Justin A. Reynolds

The Belles Series by Dhonielle Clayton

The Weight of the Stars by K. Ancrum

Queenie by Candice Carty-Williams

Let Me Hear a Rhyme by Tiffany D. Jackson

The Voice in My Head by Dana L. Davis

I Wanna Be Where You Are by Kristina Forest

The Black Flamingo by Dean Atta

The Evolution of Birdie Randolph by Brandy Colbert

Dear Haiti, Love Alaine by Maika and Maritza Moulite

Kingdom of Souls by Rena Barron

A Blade So Black by L.L. McKinney

A Dream So Dark by L.L. McKinney

Full Disclosure by Camryn Garrett

The Forgotten Girl by India Hill Brown

Tyler Johnson Was Here by Jay Coles

Piecing Me Together by Renee Watson

Solo by Kwame Alexander

A Song Below Water by Bethany C. Morrow

By Any Means Necessary by Candid Montgomery

War Girls by Tochi Onyebuchi

Light It Up by Kekla Magoon

Who Put This Song On? by Morgan Parker

Monday’s Not Coming by Tiffany D. Jackson

Finding Yvonne by Brandy Colbert

Learning to Breathe by Janice Lynn Mather

I am Alfonso Jones by Tony Medina

The Stars Beneath Our Feet by David Barclay Moore

Ghost by Jason Reynolds

X: A Novel by Ilyasah Shabazz

The Boy in the Black Suit by Jason Reynolds

How It Went Down by Kekla Magoon

Dread Nation by Justina Ireland

Deathless Divide by Justina Ireland

Not So Pure and Simple by Lamar Giles

The Field Guide to the North American Teenager by Ben Philippe

Monster by Walter Dean Myers

Pride by Ibi Zoboi

Opposite Of Always by Justin A. Reynolds

Buried Beneath The Baobab Tree by Adaobi Tricia Nwaubani

The Effigies Series by Sarah Raughley

Well-Read Black Girl: Finding Our Stories, Discovering Ourselves by Glory Edim

Such A Fun Age by Kiley Reid

I Almost Forgot About You by Terry McMillan

Red at the Bone by Jacqueline Woodson

Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi

What Is Not Yours Is Not Yours by Helen Oyeyemi

A Phoenix First Must Burn: Sixteen Stories of Black Girl Magic, Resistance, and Hope edited by Patrice Caldwell

This Is My America by Kim Johnson

Punching the Air by Ibi Zoboi and Yusef Salaam

If You Come Softly by Jacqueline Woodson

Nightmare of the Clans by Pamela E. Cash

Black Boy, White School by Brian F. Walker

Behind You by Jacqueline Woodson

Hush by Jacqueline Woodson

Tiffany Sly Lives Here Now by Dana L. Davis

Grown by Tiffany D. Jackson

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After learning what Black Out Tuesday was originally intended to be, I too would like to use this opportunity to boast about some black creators and their work that needs more attention.

These are the three books, two graphic novels and one poetry book, that I will be reading this week.

✊🏾 I Am Alfonso Jones by Tony Medina and illustrated by Stacey Robinson & John Jennings with a foreword by Bryan Stevenson:

When an off-duty officer mistakes a clothes hanger for a gun, Alfonso Jones wakes up in the afterlife guided by fellow victims of police shootings. Meanwhile, Alfonso’s family and friends struggle with their grief and seek justice for Alfonso’s murder.

✊🏾Your Black Friend and Other Strangers by Ben Passmore:

Described as required reading for those seeking to be useful allies in the fight for justice, this collection of culturally charged comics tackles race, gentrification, the prison system, racial micro-aggressions, and more with both humor and relatability.

✊🏾Say Her Name by Zetta Elliot and illustrated Loveis Wise:

In this collection of haikus and poems, Elliot creates a chorus of voices celebrating the creativity, resilience, and courage of Black women and girls while also paying tribute to victims of police brutality as well as the activists championing for the Black Lives Matter cause.

I encourage everyone to check out these books, support a independent bookstore (especially Black-owned ones!!!) and your local libraries. And as always, BLACK LIVES MATTER! And please don’t forget to let your Black joy shine!

- Veronika ✊🏾

IG: @black_girls_lit

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some helpful links for quarantine

For taking care of your health

How to fix your sleep schedule

The mandatory midday break

How to deal with study burnout

For when you can’t seem to get anything done

Staying focused: tips for maintaining focus while studying

Getting stuff done: how to deal with lack of motivation

How to beat procrastination

For organizing all the stuff you have to do

Energy management: a human-based organization method

Flexible time-blocking: a more breathable way to get things done

The ABCDE method: accomplish tasks more efficiently

Get organized with Notion: the all-encompassing productivity app

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The foxes as shit i pulled in third year university

it’s that time of year again! yet another follow up to the foxes as shit i pulled in high school, in first year uni, during my summer job, and in my second year uni

Nicky Hemmick: my ta asked me what i was writing my research paper on and i just shrugged, said “something sexy” and wandered away (it was about sexual control in occupied states)

Neil Josten: fell down a flight of stairs at school because i was rushing. someone who saw was like “oh my god are you okay???” i literally sat up, said “i dont have time for this” and then got up and walked away

Andrew Minyard: was doing donuts in a campus parking lot after a snowstorm and got into an active car chase with a campus police car and won.

Aaron Minyard: was really hopped up on cold meds during a 16 hour shift and my boss looked at me and asked me how i was and i looked her dead in the eyes and said “imma be straight im real fuckin sick my dude”

Allison Reynolds: kept one of my uni’s parking ticket envelopes, put it under my wiper with a note inside that said “give me a ticket, i dare you” because i didnt want to pay for parking (it worked btw)

Renee Walker: saw a physical manifestation of a ghost at work, literally looked at it through squinted eyes for like a minute, said “alright” and then went the fuck back to what i was doing

Matt Boyd: played sims 4 in a lecture because i didnt feel like paying attention.  the prof noticed.  did i stop playing sims? no.  no i did not.

Dan Wilds: looked my professor dead in their eyes and said “im illiterate” when they handed me a book to use as a resource for a paper

Kevin Day: didn’t remember the historic term for drunkenness (inebriety) so on my exam i just wrote “fun”… my prof gave me 100% on the exam

Riko Moriyama: was having a full on mental breakdown and was crying as i walked across campus to class (like kim k c. 2011 sobbing) i walked past a campus tour group and didnt even bother to look like i wasnt crying because i’m a bitch who likes subjecting the next generation to harsh realities

Seth Gordon: sneezed in a small lecture and the prof turned to me and said “seriously?”

Wymack: texted one of my profs to ask if we were still going to meet when she was 20 minutes late.  Received a response that simply read “well shit. i’m not making that.”

Jeremy Knox: made a point in seminar and me TA goes “does anyone have anything they’d like to add to that?” one kid legit looks at me, nods and deadass says “retweet”

Jean Moreau: quit my job i’d had for 2 years that i hated and on my last day turned to my boss said “well it’s been real” threw a peace sign and walked out the fucking door

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andrew minyard, on his tour of the Nest: damn bitch you live like this?

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your feelings while reading these books:

evenfall: a psycho assassin and a tired apathetic softie get thrown in together to kill people and blow stuff up and it’s hella gay so you’re naming your future child after hsin liu vega

the foxhole court: you opened the book and suddenly you’ve adopted a team of hopeless clusterfucks and everyone’s getting hurt and you don’t know what’s happening or why a fucking sport is making you cry but you’ve written your one son neil josten in your will 

vicious: literally no one is innocent except the dog and your new son is the villain who plotted the death of his best friend for ten years in prison and you know what, you’re perfectly fine with that

radio silence: we’re just trying to be fashionable and listen to music and record a podcast, why the fuck is everything going to shit

the captive prince: ok wow you’re starting a Sharp Cheekbones Club: exclusive members- laurent, cardan, kiernan. also you realize you have a sudden interest in war politics bc damn bitch this shit be lit

the cruel prince: suddenly you’re a proud slytherin and there’s lots of stabbing and plotting and you don’t want to read any book in which the love interests don’t want to kill each other

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that kitchen scene from all for the game.