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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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I think next thursday is gonna be the best day of my entire life tbh
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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read a girl who dates books
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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I hope Sirius constantly turned into a dog to get out of arguments with James, because it would mean that James was left with the following options:
Being known as the crazy man who is arguing with a dog
Rough-housing, and being known as the man who is mean to dogs
Submitting to Sirius’s literal puppy-dog eyes, and losing almost every argument they have from the age of 15 onward
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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people at work: wow, you are always in such a good mood, how do you do that?
me, an actually cranky, apathetic, trainwreck human: it’s called manners, susan.
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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You ever think Peter Parker has career day at school and hes all sad because he doesnt have any parents to come in to talk about their careers, and May would but she’s unable to make it, so Pete is just sitting their in his desk glumly and then Tony fucking Stark walks in wearing his million dollar suit and cool glasses saying “Hi, kid! Hope I’m not late” and all the other kids are gasping in amazement, and Peter has just the BIGGEST smile on his face bc yeah Tony Stark is basically his dad and hes never felt happier
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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girls are so hot
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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not a fan of cold but am a fan of crunchy leaves and Christmas
You know what? i’ll say it. I can’t wait till it’s autumn and winter time! 
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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This cat statue I saw at a thrift store.. absolute fucking unit.
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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boutta binge this instead of sleep tonight
do yourself a favor and read “Oh God, Not Again!” by Sarah1281
it is a harry potter fanfic from like 2009, 160k words, 50 chapters
basically, adult Harry accidentally goes back in time and wakes up on his 11th birthday again, but with all his memories of the future intact
(the way he travels back makes no sense whatsoever but it doesn’t really matter)
harry decides upon 3 goals:
fuck up as much shit as possible
make a shitload of money
save some lives or whatever
it is
H I L A R I O U S
his go-to explanation for how he knows what’s going to happen?
he has a psychic scar
(hermione is SO PISSED about this)
(neville’s like “either he’s psychic, or he’s the greatest conman alive”)
everyone just sort of assumes harry’s insane and he doesn’t do much to dispute this
harry also decides to make it his mission in life to LOSE the house cup every year
“snape is my sole ally”
he also goes out of his way to befriend neville, ginny, and luna earlier this time, so they’re part of the gang throughout and it’s great
even draco is a friend!
(kind of)
(when harry’s not spreading a rumor that draco’s the lovechild of narcissa and snape, anyway)
harry’s motivation for everything he does in this story is basically, “oh, this will be hilarious”
either that or, “it’s probably a tax deductible”
because the way lockhart is written in this story is also amazing and harry ends up teaming up with him to merchandise The Boy Who Lived so he can have cash to burn
(so he gets a LOT of shit done via bribes)
it gets to the point where harry is able to convince everyone that he’s not the heir of slytherin…. because if he was, he’d have found a way to make money off of it
and everyone’s like “yeah ok that checks out”
in this timeline, neville’s boggart isn’t snape…. it’s harry as the minister of magic
harry also decides to make sure cedric lives by quizzing him constantly on what to do if he ends up in a graveyard
harry: by the way, that reminds me – cedric. graveyard.
cedric, not even really listening: run like hell.
the sheer magnitude to which harry does not give a fuck in this timeline is truly awe-inspiring
he mouths off to everyone, and i mean everyone. lockhart, snape, the dursleys, malfoy, friggin’ voldemort
everyone is like “what… what the fuck, harry”
(though by the end of first year it’s more like “… *deep sigh* … fine.
snape is so angry
it’s fucking hysterical and just about everyone ends up better off
here’s the link
thank me later
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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Dogs might be man’s best friend, but the cat will never tell the cops where you hide your drugs.
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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everyone please visit inspirobot.me for some truly phenomenal randomly generated inspirational quotes. i can’t stop laughing
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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Control+shift+T will reopen any tabs you accidentally close
this works even if you close an entire window with twenty tabs. reblog to save a life
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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is that a kitten in your pocket or are you just happy to see me
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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every time I hang out with other cats I feel like I’m cheating on mine
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queenofhellyea · 6 years
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