ogeewankenobi

[ogeewankenobi]

Funny how I became the “villain”.. it’s almost comical how I quickly went from the love of your life to a “bitch you didn’t even know” with a 5-minute phone call, it’s honestly a joke how you paint me to be the evil one in this relationship. But if I’m being truthful with myself it hurts me to see that my character became the villain in a story I tried so hard to be the heroine in, how did my desire to love and commit myself to becoming the best version of Briana translate to me not giving a fuck about you? A part of me is curious to hear your misconstrued version of the past year and I would be lying if I say I wasn’t a bit curious to hear how the world you vent to views me. I never knew the true meaning of “a thin line between love and hate” until I sent that “we need to talk” text, I listened to you say any and everything to tear me down, I sat quietly and listened attentively to your words I focused on the emotions that accompanied them, even made sure to ask questions to get the clarity I needed. And as hard as I tried to deny the obvious it was painfully apparent that the love I had for you was deeper than the love I received in return. It was crazy to me how you could possibly ever feel this way about me, it wasn’t until I questioned my own actions that I got a clear understanding. “How did I end up here?” because this wasn’t supposed to be how the story ends, I envisioned it differently so many times in my head and somehow this was a turn of events I didn’t see coming. “Am I really evil?” “Could I be a bitch?” “Were you able to see something in me that I didn’t see in myself?” and the answer to every single question was “Hell no”… I wasn’t evil, I wasn’t a bitch and you seen everything in me that I seen in myself, the growth, the maturity, the love for myself, this new sense of self-awareness that no longer allowed you to treat me as if I was less than. It wasn’t until I evaluated myself and not you that it became apparent that you were aware of this change and it frightened you, your words were no longer enough to intimidate me, I was no longer the timid girl who backed down from confrontation I stood tall and spoke the fuck up for me, and I loved every bit of it! It pains me to be viewed as a villain but the cost of continuing to be the hero is a price I’m no longer willing to pay. Hero, villain, anti-hero, super- villain regardless of how you write me in your story I’ve decided to own all of it and wear my cape with pride..

-the villain 🦹🏾‍♀️

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