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localcryptic · 17 hours
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call his pussy british the way that I’m innit
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localcryptic · 17 hours
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sorry for finding it hot when people's hair goes grey. as if im wrong
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localcryptic · 17 hours
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"well if it's not androgynous what should a nonbinary person look like??" ***EXTREMELY LOUD BUZZER SOUND*** WRONG!!!! YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG!!!!!!! NOBODY "SHOULD" ANYTHING!!!! THAT IS NOT WHAT QUEERNESS IS ABOUT!!!!! GO TO THE CALM DOWN CORNER AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE JUST SAID.
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localcryptic · 1 day
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Clint you've got to be fucking kidding me
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localcryptic · 1 day
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My solution for bloatware is this: by law you should hire in every programming team someone who is Like, A Guy who has a crappy laptop with 4GB and an integrated graphics card, no scratch that, 2 GB of RAM, and a rural internet connection. And every time someone in your team proposes to add shit like NPCs with visible pores or ray tracing or all the bloatware that Windows, Adobe, etc. are doing now, they have to come back and try your project in the Guy's laptop and answer to him. He is allowed to insult you and humilliate you if it doesn't work in his laptop, and you should by law apologize and optimize it for him. If you try to put any kind of DRM or permanent internet connection, he is legally allowed to shoot you.
With about 5 or 10 years of that, we will fix the world.
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localcryptic · 1 day
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advertising strategy for Hepatior, a 1930s medicine to treat liver ailments
#me
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localcryptic · 1 day
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you came back wrong and i am racked with guilt because i cannot bear to see you like this and i should have let you rest. i loved you so much that i defied death itself but i do not think either of us are happy
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localcryptic · 1 day
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literally this
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localcryptic · 1 day
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(having mildly hard time drawing) i hate doing this shit i’m never doing it again (having mildly fun time drawing) i love this shit it’s what i was born to do (having mildly hard time drawing) i hate this shi
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localcryptic · 2 days
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The thing with having a sleeping Hypnos pfp is that like 20 other people in this fandom have a sleeping Hypnos pfp and each time I see one it’s like “wait that’s not me-“
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localcryptic · 2 days
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the whole point of a zine is that it's cheap to produce, amateur and homemade. if you're being asked to apply to participate in a print project, it is not a zine. if the final product is being printed and bound professionally, it is not a zine. if you are being asked to enter into any kind of licensing agreement more complex than "my work can be reproduced as part of this publication" it is not a zine. nine times put of ten if the final product costs more than $5 you have left zine country. im so serious about this.
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localcryptic · 2 days
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SLUT WORLD IS UNDER ATTACK
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localcryptic · 2 days
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localcryptic · 2 days
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there should be a socially acceptable way to say "im not sure what to say to that. can you say something different"
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localcryptic · 2 days
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my mom was trying to chew through some really tough steak and she turned to me and said “just call me The Gnawer.” she would do numbers here
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localcryptic · 2 days
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anyone else uhh..... anyone else ummmm. anyone else. anyone else, anyone.. anyone, anyone. oh god anyone
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localcryptic · 2 days
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anyone else uhh..... anyone else ummmm. anyone else. anyone else, anyone.. anyone, anyone. oh god anyone
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