i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

Keep an eye out at thrift stores! You probably won't find a super light one, but you might find a relatively lightweight one. That's where I got my current chair.

Anyone have any suggestions on budget-friendly wheelchairs? Preferably manual, decently lightweight/easy to transport, and easy to purchase.

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

“My back hurts.”

I contort my spine into the most sickening and ungodly positions. The people stare in a mix of bewilderment and horror as my body emits a series of bone cracking sounds into the crisp autumn air-

“That’s better.”

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

you're 24 you're not a failure.

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

Help Me Get New Mobility Aids!!!

Happy Disability Pride Month! I initially wasnt going to make a post to try to get new mobility aids/tools, but I really need them, so what the hell.

I am a multiply disabled Black lesbian and I have been without proper supportive mobility since the start of the pandemic. I had many of my things broken or thrown away during this time period, and I thought I could go without but its been so long and I really cant anymore.

I need smart/ergonomic forearm crutches because regular forearm crutches wreck my fragile hypermobile wrists, I need braces for both legs and ankles, a shower bench and detachable showerhead. All of this combined is a bit over $550.

I REALLY need this, esp the crutches! My mobility and bodily autonomy would be GREATLY increased If I was able to get these items. I

CA: $sleepyhen

VN: wildwotko

Dm for P@ypal

TLDR?: Disabled Black Lesbian needs new mobility aids for increased mobility and autonomy.

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

Midnight to 3 am. End up waking up at 5 to 7 am anyway becuase I live a cursed existence

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

Me: telling my therapist about something that happened with my family that I thought wasn't great but wasn't that big a deal.

My therapist: So when do you think you'll be able to move out?

#cptsd #trauma #trauma dump

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

The other thing I hate about this is I shouldn't have to leave. Even if I could leave (I can't), I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO! I shouldn't have to leave my friends, and family, and the place I grew up, and every good memory I have becuase SOME PEOPLE want to be a fucking dick for no reason.

We say hey, people are harassing us and threatening our lives for something that is beyond our control and doesn't affect them. And your response is "Maybe you should stop hanging out with them.😊" How fucking victim blamey can you get?

white trans ppl from liberal suburbia in blue states will go on and on about how scary it is to be a trans person right now but the second they encounter a trans person from a red state they’ll be like “ummmmm why would you live in such an uncivilized place lmao maybe you shouldn’t have voted for republicans like if you don’t like how conservative it is then just leave” as if these states aren’t populated by black and brown people who face intense voter suppression and poor people who can’t just up and leave. not to mention the fact that all those articles y’all are sharing about the state of trans safety? those are in our states and we will be the ones who go down first. so instead of laughing at us dumb hicks from your liberal safe haven, consider instead shutting the fuck up and actually doing something to help us. because they’re coming for you next.

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

#let my limbs hang off the bed

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

Ok so at this point I've had two people roll up to me in manual wheelchairs, well, one of them was somebody pushing somebody who was nonverbal at the time, but it still counts. They asked me why I had zip ties around my tires.

It's winter where I'm living and we have really bad snow. And the snow plow people are really bad at their jobs probably because there aren't snow plow people who clean sidewalks. As a solution I got to thinking about how I could increase the traction on my wheels. And the most redneck thing I could think of was taking a bunch of zip ties and tying them around my wheels. They last surprisingly long, and work surprisingly well. It's basically the same premise as chains for your tires during the winter.

I chose to space them out pretty evenly so there's about one for every spoke. You could probably do more or less depending on how many you want and how much traction you get but I wouldn't go more than three per spoke. I realize that it's a bit later in the winter, and I probably should have made a post about this sooner, but I came up with it about a week ago. So please share this, even if you're not disabled, because there are tons of people I know who are stuck in their houses because they can't get around in the snow. A pack of zip ties costs about $5, which compared to $200 knobby snow tires is a big save, and if you want to invest you could get colored zip ties.

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

High intelligence low wisdom, with one wild characteristic such as collects teeth.

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

When my cousin got divorced her ex tried to insist that he had a home for the kids. The judge had to inform him that the kids living with his parents didn't count.

Anyone ever think about how the classic ‘dad gets custody on weekends’ arrangement that MRAs complain about is actually misogynistic? If one parent constantly gets you up in the mornings, often puts you in after school programs because she works, and only spends quality time with you when you’re both tired between work and bedtime, your relationship with that parent is gonna be strained. If one parent lets you sleep in and watch tv, never had to work and can spend all their time with you, you’re obviously going to prefer that parent. On top of that, it sets up a system where the mother has to do most of the actual ‘parenting’ such as taking kids to school, making sure they do homework, etc, while the dad mostly just hangs out with the kids. The dad doesn’t have to worry about the kids when he’s working, because in a way he functionally still has a wife to do that for him. I knew kids on this schedule whose dads didn’t make them do homework, didn’t enforce bedtime, basically any of the hard parts of parenting. Even in the best case scenario, the mom is still going to be seen as the ‘mean parent’ by the child, despite working 5 times as hard as the dad and having much more of a strain on her career and personal life than the dad.

Its really just the classic misogynistic "cool fun dad vs. frigid nagging mom" but for divorced parents and I hate it

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

The other day my friend described my past as "the traumatic backstory from some teenagers angsty self insert oc" which... accurate but harsh.

#cptsd #trauma #at least im funny tho #did osdd #did memes

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

Trying too hard from central park (haven't seen the show but the song dug into my psyche)

A good thing by Kyle stibbs

Saint bernard by lincoln

Teen idle by marina (obviously)

The fire by griffinilla (almost operatic in nature and it speaks to my religious trauma)

Good as it gets by little hurt (the line "maybe I'll just find out who I am and I won't like who it is" kills me and yet the tune is so jaunty)

God help the outcasts and heavens light from the hunchback of notre dame (again my guys with religious trauma will back me up on this)

Honesty Hoziers entire discography but that really goes without saying. If I had to pick one song though arsonists lullaby.

Migraine from twenty one pilots. (A pretty mainstream pick I guess but still its good. My favorite line from this would probably be "am I the only one I know waging my wars behind my face and above my throat"

Control by Halsey (great exploration of being afraid of yourself and the way your bad mental health makes you angry and lash out)

Flares by the script (hurts but in a hopeful way. Like a the world may be ending but you aren't alone sort of way)

The mystic by Adam Jensen (pretty blatant suicidal ideation do if that'll bother you don't listen but it's a pretty accurate representation so if you've struggled with that you have a good odds of connecting with it)

Demons by imagine dragons (I will hear no imagine dragons slander. They didn't stop being good just becuase they became popular. I don't care that they're mainstream music they were my gateway to more indie and alt music)

Battlefield by SVRCINA (not the nightcore version. No shade to the nightmare version but the vocals in this are amazing and dig into my heart deeper)

Lost boy by Ruth B. (Listen you just have trust me on this one)

Soldier by Flueurie (kinda hopeful? Very you'll get through your problems not becuase you are tough but becuase you don't have another option)

Coming home part 2 by skylar grey (peaceful and hopeful in a way that hurts deep in my bones.)

The sound of silence by disturbed (yes we all know this one. But the feeling of slowly and helplessly watching the end of the world unfold is as relevant as ever.)

what are songs that make u guys ache… they don’t even need to be very sad songs, really. just songs that make your heart hurt in its place in your chest

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

I've been in therapy since I was 10, I have never had that happen to me.

I was about to write something like “why can’t therapists ever be like just ‘I’m sorry I came across condescending’ instead of immediately jumping to ‘I’m not condescending let’s analyze what made you think that about me.’”

And then I began to wonder… is this another situation like “no, seph, run, these are not good therapists. They should probably not have a script for how to derail all your complaints about their behaviour back to your problems. It is entirely possible that you are experiencing a paranoid delusion but any therapist worth their salt knows you don’t challenge a delusion like that.”

Is “please stop talking down to me”

“I’m not talking down to you, you’re projecting and wrong.” A normal therapy experience?

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

"The One Spirit Team has been working tirelessly to help as many families on the Rez as possible through this intense winter season. Road conditions are making it near impossible to distribute firewood and food. Many homes are without power or a reliable and safe heat source.

Any donations received at this time will be used to purchase firewood, supplies, and food to take care of those critically in need."

Donations can be made here:

Donations to Oglala Re-Member organization, which also assists people living in the Pine Ridge Reservation, can be made here:

[i-am-so-bad-at-picking-names]

This is why my 'first drafts' are always really clean and don't need much touching up. Becuase its not actually my first draft. Its the first draft thats made it onto paper, but I've written and re-written it in my head half a dozen times.

Just daydreaming about your stories or what you want to write truly is being productive despite what your brain demanding immediate results to and gratification from your productivity might tell you, like it lets you work through details, figure out what you want, rotate scenes around and change things up if you're still unsure about them, have a little fun without committing just quite yet, even if it's not being written down, it is being processed in your mind nonetheless and it is contributing to future productivity and the eventual endgame of wherever you want to be going with it all, even if you're not physically interacting with or creating or consuming something at the moment, you are creating thoughts, coming up with the blueprints, and maybe those blueprints won't always come to fruition, but maybe one day they'll help you build something great, or maybe they just brought you some joy or intrigue at the time and that's fine too, and etc, etc, so yeah, let yourself daydream more