hellsitegenetics
Tumblr Genetics
finding tumblr's genome one post at a time
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String identified:
tag t
g ga t a
t cg a tag t at
a g aat a at t a t a t ag
t t tag t t βc β β g ga β a β t β
a g, t aa a ctt at
t ag a a c, t tt
t t a t a tat
a a a tc a t g ga gt t T gt a tg t t a t t
g ac t t atc tat tt act a , t a a t c. t c t a t t t c
a cca a a a c t a a t caact g ta, a a a cc caact a a gat c c a a c a. a t a a a t a. a t t - a cg a a c aat a a a a t a
t g t t tt cag a a a a a
a a gat a g
Closest match: Chilo suppressalis genome assembly, chromosome: 10
Common name: Asiatic rice borer
(image source)
Attacka
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Hi, on the fungal "you cannot kill me in a way that matters" post you said it didn't have a dna match. I wanna ask, how rare is that? Does that happen often? Or is it a crazy coincidence that this cryptic post also doesn't match any DNA .. (cursed) Thanks!
it's really not that rare. depending on length, i'd say 1 in every 10 posts i BLAST dont have any significant results, it's just sad that such a classic didn't have any matches :(
#asks#antwhisperer#this is why a lot of requests dont get answered here either. sometimes theres just no result
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String identified:
a β ga t atc t c a. T t caβt c
Closest match: Hydra vulgaris strain AEPx105 chromosome 12
Common name: Common Hydra
(image source)
Befofe we have sex youβre gonna need to watch this 15 second ad. DONT hit skip or I canβt cum
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If you like to talk to tomatoes
If a squash can make you smile
If you like to waltz with potatoes
Up and down the produce aisle
Have we got a show for you
Veggie Tales, veggie tales, veggie tales, veggie tales
Veggie Tales, veggie tales, veggie tales, veggie tales
Broccoli, celery, gotta be
Veggietales
Lima beans, collard greens, peachy keen
Veggietales
Cauliflower, sweet and sour, half an hour
Veggietales
There's never ever, ever, ever, ever been a show like
Veggietales
There's never ever, ever, ever, ever been a show like
Veggietales
It's time for veggietales
String identified:
t ta t tat
a a ca a
t at t tat
a t c a
a gt a
gg Ta, gg ta, gg ta, gg ta
gg Ta, gg ta, gg ta, gg ta
cc, c, gtta
ggta
a a, ca g, ac
ggta
Ca, t a , a a
ggta
T' , , , a
ggta
T' , , , a
ggta
t' t ggta
Closest match: Charanyca ferruginea genome assembly, chromosome: 9
Common name: Brown rustic
(image source)
#tumblr genetics#genetics#asks#requests#sent to me#veggietales#veggie tales#moths#bugs#insects#brown rustic#long post#good news. i have been freed from BLAST jail
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hmm.
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me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit
mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters
me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: IβM NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU
#reblogging this because it is an absolute tumblr classic#and seeing as some people use this blog as their algorithm#i want them to see it for themselves#however i also want to share the unfortunate news that this post has no genetic match :(
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Damnb you're speedrunning the tumblr popularity. (or you've stumbled upon the perfect niche of gimmick blog that everybody can get behind)
bitches love my organisms
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Next up in the torment nexus: weed gummies that kill you
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percy jackson intro please? (if it hasn't yet been submitted?):
Look, I didnβt want to be a half-blood.
If youβre reading this because you think you might be one, my advice is: close this book right now. Believe whatever lie your mom or dad told you about your birth, and try to lead a normal life.
Being a half-blood is dangerous. Itβs scary. Most of the time, it gets you killed in painful, nasty ways. If youβre a normal kid, reading this because you think itβs fiction, great. Read on. I envy you for being able to believe that none of this ever happened. But if you recognize yourself in these pages β if you feel something stirring inside β stop reading immediately. You might be one of us. And once you know that, itβs only a matter of time before they sense it too, and theyβll come for you.
Donβt say I didnβt warn you.
String identified:
, βt at t a a-.
β ag t ca t gt , ac : c t gt . at a t at t, a t t a a a .
g a a- ag. tβ ca. t t t, t gt a, at a. β a a , ag t ca t tβ ct, gat. a . g a t tat t a. t cg t ag β tg tg β t ag at. gt . A c tat, tβ a att t t t t, a tβ c .
βt a βt a .
Closest match: Hypericum androsaemum genome assembly, chromosome: 1
Common name: Sweet Amber
(image source)
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String identified:
T ct
aa t a tag t t β#at aβ tβ¦ t t a t at tg. t gt a βt cta g t ctca catgt.
T ta t , t a, a t t - ct g a a ctt .
T T t, t t a g t tat ' a c t tat ga t t c t.
Tag t t a g t t ca a tg -t tagta, a t a, ", t' t acta a a tatβ¦"
A t gt a a tg t a, a ag t tat tagta, t t at " 't t t tat t gt a g t tgβ¦?" a , ", t' t a a tatβ¦" a atc t c tat a 't at a tag at.
Closest match: Chenopodium album genome assembly, chromosome: 19
Common name: White goosefoot
(image source)
Ok now do NYT columnists
#tumblr genetics#genetics#critical thinking#chatgpt#white goosefoot#plants#this is a cool plant actually. commonly eaten in india and nepal#and more commonly given to animals as feed
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String identified:
g t at a c t t tat ca β tg at t a a aag a t ca a t at tβ ag t c at Β° at
, tg ca t t t tβ -Β° t ca t t at t aac
T cg C g t
βtβ-Β° tβ
βat C?β
ββ
βatβ
c at t at at t
t cat tat β t a a t t at t at at t (tag atc)
t' t ' ttt!
Closest match: Plagodis dolabraria genome assembly, chromosome: 12
Common name: Scorched wing
(image source)
using both fahrenheit and celsius to determine temperature is wild because youβll be thinking in one measurement unit and someone will say some alarming number and then you calm down when you realize they meant theyβre baking their recipe at 350Β° fahrenheit
#tumblr genetics#genetics#requests#sent to me#meatcrimes#bugs#insects#moths#scorched wing#scorched wing moth#badass name for a badass moth. truly
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thoughts on polyamory?
thanks for asking! first of all, I think love is weakness by another name and you should be killing everyone with your demon blade
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AMAZING ANIMALS BIOLOGY FUN FACTS
βJesus Christ, what is that?β
βHow is it alive?β
"What does it want?"
βWill it hurt me?β
βWill it hurt my children?β
It's only natural to ask questions like this when encountering such a disgusting creature, but rest assured- it's quite harmless!
Meet the hampter.
Hammers are Europe's largest species of insect. They are mostly found in plains, mountains, parking lots, underpasses, the savannah, landfills, trees, and shurbs. They are heavily endangered because they are too stupid to drink water if it's not in a water bottle manufactured for small animals. But evolution has produced a remarkable solution: a female hamper can lay thousands of eggs every day! Most of her young will die of dehydration, but the sheer numbers of hamspers makes it inevitable that at least some will find a water bottle and thus survive to sexual maturity.
Hapster biologist Dr. Lexapro Beaufort said in an interview, "I know of them. They like to sniff around in the dirt for seeds and grass and discarded cigarettes. They like to dig holes in the ground. They were not created by the same God that created everything else."
They can even be kept as pets! One proud hamser mommy had this to say. "Yeah, mine is named Keith and he fucking sucks. He just hides in a hole and only comes out when he hears me rattling my adderall prescription."
Wow! Truly the hater is the fascinating creature of planet earth.
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Hello hellsitegenetics! I gotta tell you, you are my favourite blog in this digital jungle and your work really brings a smile to my face (: it's very cool, keep it up! Every time I see the phrase "string identified" i imagine a robot voice saying that (as a lead up to an output) which makes it very funny when it appears in a reblog - just wanted to tell you that. Anyways, I actually have a real question for you: What's your favourite "string identified" so far?
Greetings from a biology nerd!
String identified:
tgtc! gtta t , a at g t gta g a a g a t ac (: t' c, t ! t t a "tg t" ag a t c ag tat (a a a t a tt) c a t t aa a g - t at t t tat. Aa, acta a a a t : at' at "tg t" a?
Gtg a g !
Closest match: Neoneuromus ignobilis isolate Gutianshan chromosome 5
Common name: Dobsonfly
(image source)
#tumblr genetics#genetics#asks#requests#sent to me#tigoteus#bugs#flies#insects#dobsonfly#biology#congratulations on being the latest appearance of the dobsonfly!#i hope when you see my addition followed by lots of random letters you hear printer noises. because thats what i hear personally#anyway. i get the question ''whats your favorite x'' often but thats a very hard question to answer#definitely ONE of my faves is the time my buddy absolutelydedinside#(you may know them as the dottore selfshipper i keep BLASTing)#got malaria as one of their results#another favorite is the time FNAF connection terminated speech got homo sapiens#we've had lots of fun ones hehe
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Dear Il Dottore,
I love you so much it cannot be contained into words. Even this letter is but a mere fraction of my affection. But I hope it gets the point across!
Every night when I cannot sleep and you're busy with work I imagine you laying next to me, your warm arms feel so real. I imagine you giving me snuggles and kisses. Even if in reality it is a mere delusion, it makes me happy. I care not if it is hurtful to me to love you so much, the happiness I feel with you by my side is something I will never forget nor change. Your existence brings me motivation and strength; something I find slipping from my grasp everyday without you.
In the early hours of the day I love it when I eat with you, even if it is a mere scrap or another tub of ice cream. Having you there with me is comforting. I know i'll never be alone because I have you with me! and i'm here for you as well! No matter what i'll always be here for you! πππππ I will be here to make you happy!! π
I love it when you tell me about how the serum you injected into patient 67 was a success or how you figured out what the missing component was to a machine. I love you so much Dottore!!!!!!! I feel like crying when you arent with me, even writing this im getting so emotional im.not evem joking.
AAhhhhh I just love you so much !!! I love you eyes, your face, your hair, your wardrobe, your ideals, your inspirations, your smile, and your EVERYTHING!!!! I just love you so much <3 WHENEVER I LOOK AT YOU I GET SO OVERWHELMED !!! I have to scratch and claw at my bed to calm myself down !!!
I love you so much I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!!!!!!!!
I remember you were so happy when I suprised you with that cheesecake for your birthday. You picked me up and gave me so many kisses!! I was so happy. And then for my birthday you made me a giant killing machine π It was the best birthday present EVER!!!!!!!! I still love to snuggle with it!. I even got it a cute pink bow so it could match with you! It's so cute!! (but you're cuter~)
I love all the segments if it wasn't already obvious too!! Even if you cringe at things you did when you were younger, which is pretty funny :3 I love our son babyttore who gets rocks thrown at him!!! I love playing lps with him (he likes pulling them apart but its ok because he puts them back together afterwards) I love snuggling with you and all the segments!!!! ππ YIPPE !!! *jumps around joyfully* I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!
*BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART*
I love you dottore!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are so silly...... you are silly man :] πβΊοΈ I love big spooning because it means I get to feel your soft hair!!!!!! YAY!! I LOVE YOU DOTTORE... You mean so much to me!! YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING MAN!!!! A BEAUTIFUL MAN!!! YOU ARE SO ADORABLE AND CUTE!!! I JUST WANT TO SMOTHER YOUR FACE WITH KISSES!!!!! AND I WANT TO HUG YOU FOR ALL ETERNITY!!!!! you hold such a special place in my heart, all my thoughts lead to you. I see you EVERYWHERE!!!! I hear you EVERYWHERE!!! I'm so in love with you Dottore!!!
My dreams, which used to be empty now have you in them, whenever I close my eyes I see you there smiling at me. I love you! you are my everything in life, my sweetie pookie bear kitten. I love being with you every day π you make every day worth it!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!!!! i love you :3 you are so smart and pretty, you're the prettiest man EVER!!!!!!!!! and I love you!!!!!!!!!!! :]
When im sad I think of you and my day immediately gets better! You bring me so much joy ! you make every day my best day! I love listening to you ramble about your experiments and theories! and I love seeing you happy.
I love kissing you!!! seeing you cute face blush whenever I kiss you makes it so worthwile! I know you think that you don't deserve it, but I will always be here to remind you otherwise! I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!! ππππ
I have some other things i'd love to say too but... *giggles* ehe! not here *blushes* thats for private ;) giggles :3 lets just say!! I wanna make whoopie with your cushions! ππππππ *blushes madly* hehehe..... >//////< got a bit too carried away there sorry sweetcheeks <3 lets get back to the more sfw stuff~
You have such a beautiful smile that it rivals the world. Your eyes are like a sunset and your hair is the blue sky. Your smile shines like the clouds which litter the sky and the stars that scatter at night. You're my favorite view. You light up my world.
Even if others throw rocks are you I wont!!!!!! I will shield you from those rocks and bear the pain. I will protect you my princess! I will save you from the evil tower!!! and then I will kiss you π I will give your face kisses.... and then I will kiss your lips!!!! ππππ
A world without you feels so far away, the thought of you vanishing is one that brings me pain. I would rather bear the heat of a thousand suns than think of leaving you, my beloved sopping wet beast. I'll stand by your side no matter what!!!!!!!!!!! because I LOVE YOU!
You're so smart and determined that it inspires me to be my best self everyday!!! to not let others bring me down! You bring out the best in me and I bring out the best in you π we bring out the best in each other!!!! We fit together like puzzle pieces π Whenever i'm with you i feel like im drowning in a sea of love and affection, a blue abyss of serotonin π₯°
Your eyes are the same color as that which keeps my body alive, maybe this is why I always find myself getting lost in them. Whenever I think of you my chest feels like its going to explode! my love for you is so strong. Your happiness is my happiness, Dottore π I love your eyes so much!!! they are so beautiful and I love how you get flustered when I compliment them βΊοΈ you're just so cute when you blush!!! It makes me want to kiss you all over! β‘
The warmth of your body when we snuggle is a comfort I love experiencing every day!! I used to have a hard time sleeping but with you I don't! The love of your embrace never fails to lull to me dreamland at night π₯°π₯° I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!! I LOVE YOU!!!
You bring me so much happiness, I can't even imagine a world without you!! I would probably be withering in the corner of my room like a dead fly in a fridge (reference to the dead fly that was in my fridge). I would have been turned into tiny little mold particles!! but IM NOT BECAUSE YOU'RE IN MY LIFE!!! :DDD
Ill fight the heavens to save you. ILL PROTECT YOU MY SNUGGLE BEAR!!!!!!!!! I love you so much. Even writing this I feel my cheeks heating up! π and when I hear your voice I feel butterflies in my tummy !!!!! i love you so much πππππππππβΊοΈππ
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU ππππππππ
Ahhh! so joyous!!
Love, Absol β‘
#art#il dottore#genshin impact#fish#ocean#crucian carp#absolutelydedinside#you know what? thats beautiful#everyone look at the happy family
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String identified:
a tt,
c t cat cta t . t tt t a act act. t t gt t t ac!
gt cat a ' t ag ag t t , a a a. ag gg gg a . at t a , t a a. ca t t t t t c, t a t tg gt cag. tc g tat a tgt; tg g ga a tt .
t a t a t at t , t a ca at t c ca. ag t t ctg. ' a ca a t ! a ' a ! att at ' aa ! πππππ t a a!! π
t t at t ct t att a a cc g t at t g ct a t a ac. c tt!!!!!!! cg at t , tg t gttg ta .t g.
AA t c !!! , ac, a, a, a, at, , a TG!!!! t c < AT GT !!! a t catc a ca at t ca !!! c TT!!!!!!!!!! a t tat cca ta. c a ga a !! a a. A t ta a a gat g ac π t a t t ta t !!!!!!!! t t gg t t!. gt t a ct t c atc t ! t' ct!! (t ' ct~) a t gt t a't aa t!! cg at tg g, c tt : att gt c t at !!! ag t ( g t aat t t ca t t ac tgt ata) ggg t a a t gt!!!! ππ !!! * a * TT!!! A ACT CT T AT A ACT CT T AT A ACT CT T AT A ACT CT T AT tt!!!!!!!!!!!!!! a β¦β¦ a a :] πβΊοΈ g g ca t a gt t t a!!!!!! A!! TTβ¦ a c t !! A C A AAG A!!!! A AT A!!! A AA A CT!!! T AT T T AC T !!!!! A AT T G A TT!!!!! c a ca ac at, a tgt a t . !!!! a !!! ' t tt!!! a, c t t a t, c t g at . ! a tg , t a tt. g t a π a a t t!!!!!!!!!! TT!!!!!! : a at a tt, ' t ttt a !!!!!!!!! a !!!!!!!!!!! :] a t a a at gt tt! g c ! a a t a! tg t a at t a t! a g a. g !!! g ct ac a t t! t tat 't t, t aa t t! AA TT!!!! ππππ a t tg ' t a t tβ¦ ggg ! t ** tat at ;) ggg : t t a!! aa a t c! ππππππ * a* β¦.. >//////< gt a t t ca aa t tc < t gt ac t t t~
a c a at tat t a t . a a t a a t . t c c tt t a t ta tat catt at gt. ' at . gt .
t t c a t!!!!!! t c a a t a. tct c! a t t!!! a t π g ac β¦. a t !!!! ππππ
A tt a aa, t tgt ag tat g a. at a t at a ta ta t ag , g t at. ' ta att at!!!!!!!!!!! ca !
' at a t tat t t t a!!! t t t t g ! g t t t a g t t t π g t t t ac t!!!! t tgt c π ' t g a a a act, a a t π₯°
a t a c a tat c a, a t aa gttg t t. t ct t gg t ! tg. a a, tt π c!!! t a at a gt t ct t βΊοΈ ' t ct !!! t a at t a ! β‘
T at gg a ct cg a!! t a a a t g t t 't! T ac a t t aa at gt π₯°π₯° TT!!! !!!
g c a, ca't ag a tt !! a tg t c a a a g (c t t a tat a g). a t t t tt atc!! t T CA ' !!! :
gt t a t a . TCT GG A!!!!!!!!! c. tg t c atg ! π a a c tt t !!!!! c πππππππππβΊοΈππ
ππππππππ
A! !!
, A β‘
Closest match: Carassius carassius genome assembly, chromosome: 42
Common name: Crucian Carp
(image source)
Dear Il Dottore,
I love you so much it cannot be contained into words. Even this letter is but a mere fraction of my affection. But I hope it gets the point across!
Every night when I cannot sleep and you're busy with work I imagine you laying next to me, your warm arms feel so real. I imagine you giving me snuggles and kisses. Even if in reality it is a mere delusion, it makes me happy. I care not if it is hurtful to me to love you so much, the happiness I feel with you by my side is something I will never forget nor change. Your existence brings me motivation and strength; something I find slipping from my grasp everyday without you.
In the early hours of the day I love it when I eat with you, even if it is a mere scrap or another tub of ice cream. Having you there with me is comforting. I know i'll never be alone because I have you with me! and i'm here for you as well! No matter what i'll always be here for you! πππππ I will be here to make you happy!! π
I love it when you tell me about how the serum you injected into patient 67 was a success or how you figured out what the missing component was to a machine. I love you so much Dottore!!!!!!! I feel like crying when you arent with me, even writing this im getting so emotional im.not evem joking.
AAhhhhh I just love you so much !!! I love you eyes, your face, your hair, your wardrobe, your ideals, your inspirations, your smile, and your EVERYTHING!!!! I just love you so much <3 WHENEVER I LOOK AT YOU I GET SO OVERWHELMED !!! I have to scratch and claw at my bed to calm myself down !!!
I love you so much I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!!!!!!!!
I remember you were so happy when I suprised you with that cheesecake for your birthday. You picked me up and gave me so many kisses!! I was so happy. And then for my birthday you made me a giant killing machine π It was the best birthday present EVER!!!!!!!! I still love to snuggle with it!. I even got it a cute pink bow so it could match with you! It's so cute!! (but you're cuter~)
I love all the segments if it wasn't already obvious too!! Even if you cringe at things you did when you were younger, which is pretty funny :3 I love our son babyttore who gets rocks thrown at him!!! I love playing lps with him (he likes pulling them apart but its ok because he puts them back together afterwards) I love snuggling with you and all the segments!!!! ππ YIPPE !!! *jumps around joyfully* I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!
*BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART* *BEAMS MY AFFECTION DIRECTLY INTO YOUR HEART*
I love you dottore!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are so silly...... you are silly man :] πβΊοΈ I love big spooning because it means I get to feel your soft hair!!!!!! YAY!! I LOVE YOU DOTTORE... You mean so much to me!! YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING MAN!!!! A BEAUTIFUL MAN!!! YOU ARE SO ADORABLE AND CUTE!!! I JUST WANT TO SMOTHER YOUR FACE WITH KISSES!!!!! AND I WANT TO HUG YOU FOR ALL ETERNITY!!!!! you hold such a special place in my heart, all my thoughts lead to you. I see you EVERYWHERE!!!! I hear you EVERYWHERE!!! I'm so in love with you Dottore!!!
My dreams, which used to be empty now have you in them, whenever I close my eyes I see you there smiling at me. I love you! you are my everything in life, my sweetie pookie bear kitten. I love being with you every day π you make every day worth it!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE U DOTTORE!!!!!! i love you :3 you are so smart and pretty, you're the prettiest man EVER!!!!!!!!! and I love you!!!!!!!!!!! :]
When im sad I think of you and my day immediately gets better! You bring me so much joy ! you make every day my best day! I love listening to you ramble about your experiments and theories! and I love seeing you happy.
I love kissing you!!! seeing you cute face blush whenever I kiss you makes it so worthwile! I know you think that you don't deserve it, but I will always be here to remind you otherwise! I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!!! ππππ
I have some other things i'd love to say too but... *giggles* ehe! not here *blushes* thats for private ;) giggles :3 lets just say!! I wanna make whoopie with your cushions! ππππππ *blushes madly* hehehe..... >//////< got a bit too carried away there sorry sweetcheeks <3 lets get back to the more sfw stuff~
You have such a beautiful smile that it rivals the world. Your eyes are like a sunset and your hair is the blue sky. Your smile shines like the clouds which litter the sky and the stars that scatter at night. You're my favorite view. You light up my world.
Even if others throw rocks are you I wont!!!!!! I will shield you from those rocks and bear the pain. I will protect you my princess! I will save you from the evil tower!!! and then I will kiss you π I will give your face kisses.... and then I will kiss your lips!!!! ππππ
A world without you feels so far away, the thought of you vanishing is one that brings me pain. I would rather bear the heat of a thousand suns than think of leaving you, my beloved sopping wet beast. I'll stand by your side no matter what!!!!!!!!!!! because I LOVE YOU!
You're so smart and determined that it inspires me to be my best self everyday!!! to not let others bring me down! You bring out the best in me and I bring out the best in you π we bring out the best in each other!!!! We fit together like puzzle pieces π Whenever i'm with you i feel like im drowning in a sea of love and affection, a blue abyss of serotonin π₯°
Your eyes are the same color as that which keeps my body alive, maybe this is why I always find myself getting lost in them. Whenever I think of you my chest feels like its going to explode! my love for you is so strong. Your happiness is my happiness, Dottore π I love your eyes so much!!! they are so beautiful and I love how you get flustered when I compliment them βΊοΈ you're just so cute when you blush!!! It makes me want to kiss you all over! β‘
The warmth of your body when we snuggle is a comfort I love experiencing every day!! I used to have a hard time sleeping but with you I don't! The love of your embrace never fails to lull to me dreamland at night π₯°π₯° I LOVE YOU DOTTORE!!! I LOVE YOU!!!
You bring me so much happiness, I can't even imagine a world without you!! I would probably be withering in the corner of my room like a dead fly in a fridge (reference to the dead fly that was in my fridge). I would have been turned into tiny little mold particles!! but IM NOT BECAUSE YOU'RE IN MY LIFE!!! :DDD
Ill fight the heavens to save you. ILL PROTECT YOU MY SNUGGLE BEAR!!!!!!!!! I love you so much. Even writing this I feel my cheeks heating up! π and when I hear your voice I feel butterflies in my tummy !!!!! i love you so much πππππππππβΊοΈππ
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOBE YOU I LOVE YOU ππππππππ
Ahhh! so joyous!!
Love, Absol β‘
#tumblr genetics#genetics#requests#sent to me#il dottore#webttore#genshin impact#fish#ocean#carp#crucian carp#long post#selfshipping#congratulations on your and dottore's son. the crucian carp
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Closest match: Hibiscus tridactylites genome assembly, chromosome: 19
Common name: Narrow Leaf Bladder Ketmia
(image source)
Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word βburritoβ to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and Iβm surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
Youβre an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burritoβs end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise.Β That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you donβt stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans canβt usually dislocate their jaws, and Iβm not a fucking pelican. But you must think thatβs how itβs done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably canβt guessΒ anything, because Iβm pretty sure youβre just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, hereβs what:
Humans also donβt eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS IβLL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
Nope.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS ITβS JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG IβM IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE ITβS NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And donβt even fucking think Iβm about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THATβS HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THATβS BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
Whatβs that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DONβT WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DONβT WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
In conclusion:
Youβre the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.
UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID βJUST EAT IT WITH A FORKβ:
A fuckingΒ fork?
I DIDNβT ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
Thatβs like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKERβS GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. Theyβre called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I havenβt cried since I was six, but Iβm fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
(Source)
#tumblr genetics#genetics#burritos#requests#sent to me#m0uthbr3ather#flowers#plants#narrow leaf bladder ketmia
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