fons-may

[fons-may]

I reread All for the Game again and wow, the brainrot is still strong. I can't stop thinking about this mouthy asshole. I want to draw specific moments from the series, but for this study I just had fun playing around with the many faces of Neil Josten!

[fons-may]

Character

Some people are marionettes of themselves.

I don’t know you.

You answer with a smile.

Always neutral, common ground, no need to fight about opinions.

I want you to fight me.

We only know others when they disagree.

One day you’ll be gone, and all I’ll be certain of is that you drank your coffee black and you never held my hand.

- Fons | Ene.2023

#creative writing #marionette #fons

[fons-may]

What I love most about this, is that Neil asked why ANDREW likes Renee and not the other way around.

Like everyone else was like “what is our little sunshine Renee doing with the monster”.

But Neil disliked her so much that he couldn’t understand why Andrew, someone who barely trusts his shadow, trusted her.

#all for the game #neil you little shit I love you

[fons-may]

Yōkai by Mau Lencinas

[fons-may]

In my search for a fic with Simon’s pov of Wille being a badass pointing a gun at August

Like, what was going through his mind? I want tO KNOW

#young royals

[fons-may]

prince wilhelm: human disaster

[fons-may]

yr season 2 spoilers(?) a vent really, I don’t have friends to talk about shows

WHERE ARE MY STELLA AND FEDRIKA EDITS?????

the PINING, the POEM

My algorithm is failing me hard

Also… nobody’s gonna mention Simon still has Wille’s sweatshirt in his room? *dies of cuteness*

Simon saying the fish had no name to Marcus killed me

Wille being a badass this season was *chef’s kiss*

I’m not ashamed to admit I cried when the other horse ran away after Rousseau left

#young royals

[fons-may]

The daddy issues that rise up whenenever I read

“And my father comes to all my games. That is enough.”

never cease to amaze me.

Tears, immediately.

#aftg #all for the game

[fons-may]

Safe pool of nothingness

Oh birthday depression, how have I not miss you

But the feeling, all consuming sadness, brings the most senseless details to light

Why do I feel like I don’t want you to leave?

Stay longer and you’ll drown me, you almost did once

Leave now and I’ll feel like your visit was worthless

Are my fallen tears, called by gravity alone, justified if by tomorrow I don’t care?

- Fons | 18.Ago.2022

#writing #feelings #birthday depression #fons

[fons-may]

No one cares

If you fall going down the last steps

If you have to walk back the hallway because you forgot your water bottle on the floor

If you go to the bathroom in the middle of class

Something is embarrassing only if you think it is

If you get the grade you wanted

If you saw a pretty flower on your walk back home

If you found that little ring that keeps getting lost in the mess of memory filled trinkets in your desk

Something is worth living for only if you think it is

- Fons | Ago.2022

#creative writing #writing #feelings #forget what other people think #even if is good #fons

[fons-may]

Fire in my chest

My anger is not a candle

It doesn’t melt away, it doesn’t go off at the will of someone else’s breath

I want revenge, I want to hold grudges, I want to be petty

Shut down, not talk, ignore

I have the right to

I shouldn’t feel bad about it

I want to let it burn, let it consume all the forest inside of me until is satisfied

Let the ashes choose where they want to go, let the rain cleanse my heart

- Fons | Ago.2022

#creative writing #writing #feelings #anger #fire #fons

[fons-may]

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[fons-may]

When was the first time you realized Andreil was happening? When was the moment you could see through Neil unreliable narrator-ness?

Mine was this.

Why? I have no fucking idea.

*Hands around neck* me: Yes… I see something here.

But then! This happened like a paragraph later

I felt like this

#aftg #all for the game

[fons-may]

Heeeeey soooooo I’ve been seeing people put up their work for the @giveyourbacktome-zine in full now that it’s been out what? at least a month???! So here’s my contribution. <3 And here’s a link with more info including where you can buy the PDF! “GYBTM is a charity art zine for the All for the game book series by Nora Sakavic (@korakos), comprised of illustrations of comics of scenes from the books, on over 170 pages by 52 artists (artists list). The zine will be available for download until August 31st 2017.All benefits will be donated to the Albert Kennedy trust, a UK charity that supports LGBT teens who are homeless or live in a hostile environment. “ My other AFTG Fanart My Check Please! Fanart

[fons-may]

Dropping this then running away again 😇

[fons-may]

Lost My Whistle

sadly the love affair with myself is over

coming home from work I just want to keep driving I’m bored… bored of myself

I’m afraid I want nothing to do with me anymore

I was once… long ago thrilled to the bone to be with me

I would drive home very fast sometimes breaking the law of the highway just to be with me and at work it was what kept me going knowing that soon I would be alone

it kept me whistling while I worked but now

now I got the 45 year itch

I want to cheat on myself

I want to be in bed with someone other than me

the nails on my fingers!

the fleshy nose on my face!

my crazy dancing!

the grinding of the key in the door

divorce! I divorce myself!

no lawyer needed

I’ll be fair with myself trust me I will

I’ll keep the stereo, books - the record albums - the vacuum – sketch pads and crazy eyed owl coffee mug

I’ll be fine I will just enough alimony to get the important things:

smoke soup and vitamins

that’s fair don’t you think?

so that’s it!

I’m free from myself with the spark of a match

Liberation!

I wonder what’s on the tube

[fons-may]

Open your eyes or you might lose it.

Wait... you already did.

The worst part of losing your eyesight is being unable to look at the moon as you once did.

The sun you feel warm up your hands on a good day. The wind you feel caressing your cheeks on the top of a hill with the grass stuck to your feet.

Cold, rain, snow, heat. The boiling water you hear. A late-night shower you enjoy.

Is it night?

Does it matter?

All you have to do is put your soul out on your hand.

But the moon you admire.

You watch as if it was the most precious silent thing in life. You don’t know it’s there until you see the light, look up and stare, mesmerized at how it watches over you without expecting anything back.

It doesn’t pity you. It doesn’t care about your problems or desires. It just exists.

Without meaning to, that makes you feel less lonely.

You would have to be outside at the mercy of nature to notice the difference between a soothing moonless night and a glorious full moon with nothing but your hopeful skin.

And I would gladly freeze to death if it’s to feel the moonlight in my face one last time.

- Fons | Nov.2021

#creative writing #writing #poetry #feelings #moon #fons