dcjasontodd

[dcjasontodd]

Plot armor but it’s Bruce Wayne’s wealth.

Bruce is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce does not want to be one of the richest men in world.

He starts by implementing high starting salaries and full health care coverages for all levels at Wayne Enterprises. This in vastly improves retention and worker productivity, and WE profits soar. He increases PTO, grants generous parental and family leave, funds diversity initiatives, boosts salaries again. WE is ranked “#1 worker-friendly corporation”, and productively and profits soar again.

Ok, so clearly investing his workers isn’t the profit-destroying doomed strategy his peers claim it is. Bruce is going to keep doing it obviously (his next initiative is to ensure all part-time and contractors get the same benefits and pay as full time employees), but he is going to have to find a different way to dump his money.

But you know what else is supposed to be prohibitively expensive? Green and ethical initiatives. Yes, Bruce can do that. He creates and fund a 10 year plan to covert all Wayne facilities to renewable energy. He overhauls all factories to employ the best environmentally friendly practices and technologies. He cuts contracts with all suppliers that engage in unethical employment practices and pays for other to upgrade their equipment and facilities to meet WE’s new environmental and safety requirements. He spares no expense.

Yeah, Wayne Enterprises is so successful that they spin off an entire new business arm focused on helping other companies convert to environmentally friendly and safe practices like they did in an efficient, cost effective, successful way.

Admittedly, investing in his own company was probably never going to be the best way to get rid of his wealth. He slashes his own salary to a pittance (god knows he has more money than he could possibly know what to do with already) and keeps investing the profits back into the workers, and WE keeps responding with nearly terrifying success.

So WE is a no-go, and Bruce now has numerous angry billionaires on his back because they’ve been claiming all these measures he’s implementing are too expensive to justify for decades and they’re finding it a little hard to keep the wool over everyone’s eyes when Idiot Softheart Bruice Wayne has money spilling out his ears. BUT Bruce can invest in Gotham. That’ll go well, right?

Gotham’s infrastructure is the OSHA anti-Christ and even what little is up to code is constantly getting destroyed by Rogue attacks. Surely THAT will be a money sink.

Except the only non-corrupt employer in Gotham city is….Wayne Enterprises. Or contractors or companies or businesses that somehow, in some way or other, feed back to WE. Paying wholesale for improvement to Gotham’s infrastructure somehow increases WE’s profits.

Bruce funds a full system overhaul of Gotham hospital (it’s not his fault the best administrative system software is WE—he looked), he sets up foundations and trusts for shelters, free clinics, schools, meal plans, day care, literally anything he can think of.

Gotham continues to be a shithole. Bruce Wayne continues to be richer than god against his Batman-ingrained will.

Oh, and Bruice Wayne is no longer viewed as solely a spoiled idiot nepo baby. The public responds by investing in WE and anything else he owns, and stop doing this, please.

Bruce sets up a foundation to pay the college tuition of every Gotham citizen who applies. It’s so successful that within 10 years, donations from previous recipients more than cover incoming need, and Bruce can’t even donate to his own charity.

But by this time, Bruce has children. If he can’t get rid of his wealth, he can at least distribute it, right?

Except Dick Grayson absolutely refuses to receive any of his money, won’t touch his trust fund, and in fact has never been so successful and creative with his hacking skills as he is in dumping the money BACK on Bruce. Jason died and won’t legally resurrect to take his trust fund. Tim has his own inherited wealth, refuses to inherit more, and in fact happily joins forces with Dick to hack accounts and return whatever money he tries to give them. Cass has no concept of monetary wealth and gives him panicked, overwhelmed eyes whenever he so much as implies offering more than $100 at once. Damian is showing worrying signs of following in his precious Richard’s footsteps, and Babs barely allows him to fund tech for the Clocktower. At least Steph lets him pay for her tuition and uses his credit card to buy unholy amounts of Batburger. But that is hardly a drop in the ocean of Bruce’s wealth. And she won’t even accept a trust fund of only one million.

Jason wins for best-worst child though because he currently runs a very lucrative crime empire. And although he pours the vast, vast majority of his profits back into Crime Alley, whenever he gets a little too rich for his tastes, he dumps the money on Bruce. At this point, Bruce almost wishes he was being used for money laundering because then he’s at least not have the money.

So children—generous, kindhearted, stubborn till the day they die the little shits, children—are also out.

Bruce was funding the Justice League. But then finances were leaked, and the public had an outcry over one man holding so much sway over the world’s superheroes (nevermind Bruce is one of those superheroes—but the public can’t know that). So Bruce had to do some fancy PR trickery, concede to a policy of not receiving a majority of funds from one individual, and significantly decrease his contributions because no one could match his donations.

At his wits end, Bruce hires a team of accounts to search through every crinkle and crevice of tax law to find what loopholes or shortcuts can be avoided in order to pay his damn taxes to the MAX.

The results are horrifying. According to the strictest definition of the law, the government owes him money.

Bruce burns the report, buries any evidence as deeply as he can, and organizes a foundation to lobby for FAR higher taxation of the upper class.

All this, and Wayne Enterprises is happily chugging along, churning profit, expanding into new markets, growing in the stock market, and trying to force the credit and proportionate compensation on their increasingly horrified CEO.

Bruce Wayne is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce Wayne will never not be one of the richest men in the world.

But by GOD is he trying.

[dcjasontodd]

dick eating ice cream with a batarang is a gift to the universe

[dcjasontodd]

nine year old dickie has an AGENDA and by GOD he is going to get it DONE

[dcjasontodd]

I still have some juice in my system apparently

[dcjasontodd]

for some reason middle aged comic fans coming on the internet to defend their decision as to why they thought a twelve year old should have died or lived is so funny 😭😭😭

[dcjasontodd]

LMAO someone give Dick Grayson a medal for understanding that when Bruce stalks you and asks to take your blood, it's his way of showing he loves his kid.

[dcjasontodd]

here’s the thing about dying

it ends

and the ones who loved you grieve

and they visit your grave

(it’s a beautiful grave)

and they speak of you

of who you were

(so very young, that poor boy)

(his poor father)

and they move on, eventually

(they don’t fight anymore, your brother and father, i think you would be glad of that, if you were here)

and sometimes your memory haunts them

like a cool breeze on a warm summer night

(it hurts, it hurts, it hurts)

and they don’t blame you, for dying

(you were so young)

and they whisper of you in hushed tones,

and they share fond memories

and they put flowers on your grave

(it’s a beautiful grave)

here’s the thing about living

it hurts

and your father is so angry (so terribly sad)

and your father feels so guilty

(he was so young, your brother, just a little boy)

and it hurts in the morning, when you make your toast the way he liked it

and it hurts in the evening, when you see his face on the news

(he looks so young in the photo they use)

your father doesn’t smile anymore

and he feels so guilty

(he wasn’t there)

(he didn’t save you)

you can’t blame him, your father, he’s all you have left

he blames himself enough anyway

and you put flowers on his grave

(it’s a beautiful grave)

here’s the thing about losing a child

it’s your fault

and it hurts to remember him

(it hurts worse to forget)

and he was your little boy

so very young

and you should have been a better father

you should have protected him

(he was so smart, your boy, he was going to go to college)

you can’t forget, can’t turn away from the pain

(he wanted to do an english major)

and you put his photo on your bedside

and you look at it every night

(his memory encased in glass)

and you put flowers on his grave

(it should be your grave)

#jason todd #death in the family #alfred pennyworth #dick grayson #bruce wayne #cw grief

[dcjasontodd]

If I had a nickel for every time I drew Tim insisting that Jason is a good person I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s sad that it’s happened twice.

anyways have some de-aged Tim angst

[dcjasontodd]

Bruce and Ace <3

[dcjasontodd]

fics that villainize Talia are obsessed with having Jason bad mouth her. I think Jason should be the #1 Talia apologist actually. To a toxic degree even. You tell Jason about the weird cloning shit and he’s like “well I’m sure she had her reasons 🤷🏻‍♂️”

[dcjasontodd]

The way Jason’s plans would’ve gone way more smoothly had the lazerus pit actually made him a sociopath. Unfortunately for him he does not have the freedom of being unfeeling and he trips over his heart and loses the idgaf war

[dcjasontodd]

....Do I even need to say anything-

God bless alferd pennyworth he has to deal with a bratty princess of a son.

And Bruce says Damian gets it from Talia. Sure buddy.

[dcjasontodd]

Jason managed to score six whole hours of sleep, between the nap before going to Clark’s, then the nap he took while at Clark’s. 

Lois and Clark kept the kids out until 2pm, when they finally came back to their apartment with all four of the kids and a big bag of Chinese takeout. 

Damian, Jason could tell, was absolutely thrilled about the choice of food. Jason didn’t even bother complaining about Clark spending yet more money on them. He’d been ignored thus far, and the only way he could think of to make it stop was to cut Clark out, and, well… 

Jason didn’t want to do that. He kind of liked Clark worrying about him. 

Once they all finished eating, the kids all rushed into the playroom to play on the Switch. Even Damian, because he liked playing games and Jason would die on that hill. 

Clark turned to Jason before he could decide if he was going to follow them and asked, “Would you be interested in an internship opportunity at the Planet?” 

#omg jay #getting to be a writer #sleeping regular 9-5 hours #having lo and clark look after him #i love it so much #i hope working at the planet is like the og lois and clark series

[dcjasontodd]

they're singing dancing queen by abba <33

[dcjasontodd]

some color practice w/ steph <33

[dcjasontodd]

This just in: local reporter more famous for looking like celebrity friend than any of his stories from last decade

[dcjasontodd]

“Dames what the heck,” Jason said, as he approached, “What are you doing?”

“Nothing,” Damian said quickly, jumping to his feet. He put his back to the garbage cans, and put both his hands behind his back, as if hiding something.

Jason furrowed his brow.

What the heck could he even be trying to hide?

Athanasia walked past Jason and around Damian, then looked down behind Damian and outright cooed, “Aww a kitty?”

“No,” Damian said forcefully, pushing Attie away from the cans, “There’s nothing there.”

“Yes there is,” Athanasia said, scowling fiercely, “There’s a little baby cat.”

Jason frowned. “You found a cat?” he asked.

#extra updates!!!! :)))) #the kids are alright