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Abusive parents just love entering our rooms uninvited and then yelling “WHY IS THAT ON THE FLOOR”, thus creating the illusion that it’s perfectly fine and acceptable to intrude in another person’s space and then find any excuse to yell and berate them. Parents will act as if this is because you should be neat, but no, they’re not yelling at us because they want us to be neat, they’re yelling because they want to yell, and (1) object on the floor is excuse enough. Random lash-outs don’t help us be more organized. Random yelling doesn’t inspire us to be neat.

What it does is makes sure that we cannot relax in our own space, that we cannot feel at ease and justified sitting in our own room, or lying on our own bed, without expecting someone to burst in with intention to lash out at us. Our need to be able to relax and rest in our own space is higher priority than us being neat, and to force us to fret over every single object in our room when we should be tending to our own needs, resting our minds and feeling safe, is cruel and harmful.

We should be able to rest and relax, even if we’re in a mess. Our own piece of mind and the needs of our body are more important than maintaining the perfect order. Humans are messy sometimes, it can mean we’re stressed, upset, sick, busy with something else, chasing a dream, chasing little bit of happiness, overwhelmed, function better in mess, desire some creative disorder, or thousand other things, and none of these things is a reason to lash out or berate us. Mess isn’t a crime, it’s not a sin, it doesn’t cause mental illness, it could sooner be a symptom of one. To lash out at a kid for not keeping order is nothing but evil. Let children keep their space as they like. If you want them to know how to be neat then teach them how to organize Without Ever Yelling, and without taking their own little functional space that can be just how they like and prefer, away from them. Does the price of your child’s neatness have to be their mental health? Is it worth forcing a kid to keep perfect order, to take their ability to be calm and safe in their own room? The answer is no. Have some goddamn limit to how far you would sink to lash out at your children.

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your enemy being the person you share a home with is not normal btw .

#trauma suggestions #parentless suggestions #trauma posting #positivity #trauma recovery #mental health #well-being

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angels ^_^

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a paper love, that’s all. i fell for you because when you were walking to class you mimed forgetting your phone before turning around. i fell for you because as you held your dog’s leash, you let him pull his way towards me. i fell for you because i heard you on the phone saying “it’s a beautiful sunset here too, mom”. i fell for you because you reached for your glasses before reading something or for the look on your face when you saw the raccoon in our yard or the way your shoulders shifted during the movie. i folded you and your face into my pocket. i don’t know your name, but that’s okay. i have so many of these loves that they have formed libraries.

in the white space of my depression i take out each little paragraph of love. a woman who passed me hot sauce because she overheard me asking my partner. a little girl and her kitten. a man singing a lullaby to his daughter. these are good places and people to keep. they are weightless, you see. when i am drowning i remind myself: here is love, if it exists. 

and if i exist, maybe i am in someone’s library of goodness. they saw me dancing in my car to my chemical romance in the year 2019. they heard me reciting shrek as if it was romeo and juliet. they watched one of my silly, lonely moments - and i was not alone, then. even if i felt it so wide and hungry that it took up all the space in me. if i can love a shadow, then maybe a shadow might love me. it is okay i do not get confessions or movie dates or songs written about me. it is okay if the love i get is just this, a flashing, to remind someone: the world is so lovely, and we are all stories worth remembering.

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ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭*

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キキララカフェ

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♡ naturecore moodboard ♡

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