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this may or may not be a fantasy writing exercise for me. please reblog

#preserved moth wings

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#can't say i don't love it though

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A bilingual (Chinese/English) educational interactive website regarding various sides of Song dynasty, demonstrated via arts from Song dynasty.

#vry cool

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Brazilian cast of The Phantom of the Opera. Post on Instagram here.

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rb this and tell me what ur accent is. this has no purpose except the fact i just realized i could have like... mutuals with cockney accents or newfoundland accents or something and thats just wild

#swivelling wildly between british and local dialect-accent #when i enounciate clearly a.k.a. try to sound serious #the british accent mysteriously appears

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one of my fish guys(girls)

#fish boy

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By LabradoriteKing on Pinterest

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someday when i get the energy im gonna write a meta about a lady from chinese history that may or may not have been the inspiration for xuan ji from tgcf

but not today...have had no energy...sorry to anyone who liked reading my weird theorising about tgcf...

#tgcf #everything i write on this website is literally #1.me reading about chinese historical figures #2. me going ah! that sounds really like xxx from xxx! #3. shit they really are similar #4. welp gotta write meta about it #here's a promise to write this sometime as a sequel to the calamities post and the tanhua post #:)

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Bonus fanart

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TGCF ponies!!!

#aaaaa #love this so much #and he xuan's true form being skeletal and gaunt?? #genius

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Here's some general Hua and scholar He, based on a tweet I saw ☺️

#god. #pain

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Can someone please explain to me what evaporated milk is? Wouldn’t that just be gas by definition? I live in constant fear

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(the post editor malfunctioned and after a series of unfortunate events the original ask post is gone, so I had to make this screenshot mockup of the ask, sorry)

Thank you for prodding me to finish up a draft that's been sitting there for an inexplicably long time.

I will divide puns into exact homophones, which are pronounced exactly the same, and near homophones, which consist of the same phonemes with different tones. Though exact homophones are much punnier in speech, Internet jokes rely heavily upon text input and most people use phonetic-based Chinese input systems, meaning their autocompletes will often suggest near homophones and people will use them if they're funny enough.

To make this slightly statistically sound and not just me making up random puns, I grabbed 700k viewer comments from the years NiF was available on Youku, 2015 to 2020 (courtesy of danmu box). These danmu/弹幕 comments are timed to a particular moment in the show so they splash across the screen while you watch.

Let's start with the heavy hitters:

Xie Yu/谢玉 is an exact homophone of xièyù/泄欲, literally discharging desire, which means satisfying one’s lust or orgasming. Xie Yu's name occurs 5000+ times in the comments versus almost 900 orgasms.

Prince Yu/誉王 is an exact homophone of yùwáng/欲王, meaning prince of lust, and a near homophone, of yùwàng/欲望, which means desire (or the chaotic evil penis). The latter is far more likely to be autocompleted and shows up 1500+ times versus 200+ for the prince of lust.

Yùjīn/豫津 is a near homophone of yùjìn, 欲禁, or forbidden lust/abstinence. Because bath towel/浴巾 is an exact homophone and again far more likely to come up first in autocomplete, people overwhelmingly refer to him as the towel. In the comments, bath towel is used nearly 7000 times, 10x more frequently than his actual name, which is made up of two not-super-common characters.

Mei Changsu is often addressed as Su-xiong/苏兄 by Jingrui and Yujin in canon, which is an exact homophone of sūxiōng/酥胸, a literary term for supple and beautiful breasts that might have the same old-fashioned connotation as heaving bosom does in English. I'm going to call him gorgeous tits because he does bear a striking resemblance to the azure tit:

I've seen Chinese MCS fans note this resemblance before, but these birds don't have titillating names in Chinese so you can have this bonus joke for English speakers. Anyways, gorgeous tits are invoked in nearly 6000 comments versus almost 1200 for Su-xiong itself.

Now you can enjoy one of the comments from the above screenshot exclaiming over these names:

浴巾裹着酥胸，泄欲，这都什么什么 a bath towel (yujin) wrapped around gorgeous tits (su-xiong), orgasming (xie yu), what is all this

And the following off-color joke retold many times throughout the episodes:

Why is Mei Changsu called Su-xiong and not Mei-xiong? Because he has gorgeous tits, not tiny ones (Méi-xiōng/梅兄 is an exact homophone of flat-chested/没胸).

Here are some rarer-but-still-good puns:

Gōng Yǔ/宫羽 is a near homophone of gòngyù/共浴, bathing together (cue viewer comments about how she and bath towel belong with each other).

Níhuáng/霓凰 is a near homophone of nǐhuáng/你黄, slang meaning you’re perverted.

The emperor lives in Yǎngjū Hall/养居殿, a near homophone of penis hall since yángjù/阳具 is the yang implement, though it's most popularly punned with pigpen (I wrote about this here if you scroll to the end).

The travelogue Mei Changsu wrote annotations in, 翔地记, is an exact homophone of xiángdìjì/降帝记, or records of subduing the emperor (which I can only interpret as MCS’s Dom Diaries on how to conquer Jingyan).

To conclude, here’s a stacked area chart of the four horsemen of punny NiF names and how often they're spammed:

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comic i made for the tgcf Gotcha for Gaza fundraiser happening on twitter rn!!

the shi siblings having a pleasant bonding moment pre black water arc, requested by @ CATACLYSMICEVIE on twitter.

the event is open through the 16th! info @ TGCFaction on twitter. donate to Care for Gaza to get some cool tgcf art or writing from one of the participating artists.

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somehow I got 95/20 on an assignment

I hope they never fix it and leave it this way forever