whodecideswar

[whodecideswar]

My dad doesn’t answer the phone with a hello. He always answer with a sigh and greets me with a “ Yes, Kyana..” I always ask him if he’s tired of hearing from me , or if his day is long . And he always answers the same way “ yea, I worked __ hours “ . Me and him don’t necessarily speak often but when I do miss him, I’ll click his contact in my phone just to hear his voice. It does hurt my feelings a little less the older I’ve gotten , knowing I rarely ask him for anything other than his conversation ; yet I feel for a younger me. Always seeing fathers happy to be around their daughters , and my dad was here, exasperated seeing my name across his phone screen. Always changing the subject when I got to passionate , to something more digestible and mundane . Something mind numbing , that has no emotional toll , like my highschool basketball team. Regardless of the fact I haven’t played since I was 18, I think that was the last time he looked at me with pride .And as the years go by , I know that it was . Despite him not having much to say to me, I still reach out to hear his voice because sometimes I wish he’d say what I wouldn’t love to hear. Praying for a day when I can get a “ Hello” even if it’s just once.

[whodecideswar]

Natalie Haynes, from 'Stone Blind'

[whodecideswar]

If you're applying for office jobs and you're lying about being proficient in Excel (which you always should bc nobody knows anything and google is free) a handy video to give you the basics on Excel's functionality is Joel Sposky's You Suck at Excel Video. It's about an hour long and gives you enough background info to know what people are talking about when referring to Excel, and from there you can do your own further research. There are also handy little guides and notes people have taken on the presentation that go over the highlights here and here <3

[whodecideswar]

im just inescapably sad even though im trying so hard to be grateful and productive and self sufficient and happy

[whodecideswar]

thankful to everyone on earth i love you and im scared

[whodecideswar]

from In the House With No Doors by Sarah Kay

[whodecideswar]

Take a good look at all this pain before you walk away.

[whodecideswar]

Man I hung out w/a friend last night & it was very noticeably the first time I was cracking jokes, being silly, laughing, contributing to the flow of conversation, I bleached her hair while we played Mac Miller & talked about high school. Was in the moment & had fun. I made it to the other side & my personality is back. Took 4 months & I’m sure there will be ups & downs but I’m so elated because when you’re in that hole you genuinely feel like that’s it forever even if you’ve been down before. I LIVED BITCH!!!

[whodecideswar]

“I don’t know if I’m depressed but I feel like I’m just a weekly laughter and gathering away with good friends from just feeling normal again” is such a vibe.

[whodecideswar]

How much do you love me?

More than all the words in every language there ever was, is and will be.

#black wlw #poetry #quotes

[whodecideswar]

[whodecideswar]

if we ever stop talking and you don't know how to get back to me, just send me a picture of moon.

[whodecideswar]

[whodecideswar]

[whodecideswar]

Be intentional. Reach out to people even if they rarely reach out to you. Have food that both fills you up and nurtures you. Make a habit of catching yourself in the act of being overly critical of the things you do or the way you look (and choose to be nicer to yourself). Pick the scary new thing over the safe familiar thing once in while. Life is best lived when it’s lived consciously and with intent.

[whodecideswar]

[whodecideswar]