whatwashernameagain

[whatwashernameagain]

It’s…just…like…universally acknowledged that if you don’t like a fic you close out of it, right? 

[whatwashernameagain]

It costs you literally nothing to leave service dogs the fuck alone.

[whatwashernameagain]

So I wanted to give you guys a quick update. I will figure out what i want to say properly later (and that will include an apology) but i want you guys to know that i want to give my time in the fandom a gracious end and i don't want the last things i've written to you to be fueled by bitterness and anger. I yelled a lot of things at some of you during the moments i was shocked and hurt and during which my mental health suffered. Writing while as angry and hurt and frightened as i was is not a good idea. Which is why i deleted my angry posts. That kind of hurt lashing out has no place on my blog. I'll formulate a proper response later with the help of friends who handled the whole situation better than i did.

I haven't really read many responses yet because I don't have a deathwish for my mental health, but I discussed all the criticism with my team. What i find most important at this moment is that i take the chance to thank everyone who reached out to me to support me. I've felt like no one was in my corner at first, which made me react more emotional than i would have liked. I realize now that that isn't true. I don't have the energy to answer all of them, but I see more and more that they exist and i want to thank all those people from the bottom of my heart. Your kindness has never mattered more to me, nor have i ever needed it as much. You are the reason i came here and the reason i started writing. You helped me through a difficult time in my life and you are doing so once again right now. Thank you so much for helping me see there is still good here. It's easy to forget there is love, but you reminded me of how much I love you guys.

[whatwashernameagain]

I'm sorry your fic has gotten so much hate to the point you're suffering because of it. You don't deserve that. 💙💚 I hope that Socks being a dork can bring a small smile to your face.

********

Thank you sooooo much! This makes my day. An actual photo of your cat is something so personal and sweet. I really appreciate it.

[whatwashernameagain]

The behavior of these people stems form their inability to differentiate between conscious malevolence and overinterpreting due to personal emotional reactions, and the feeling of security that comes from belonging to a group that is supposedly not to be contradicted. The attacks on you were disproportionate. They don’t fight for the “good cause”. They use it as a playground for their egos. Their behavior does more harm than an open attack by real racists or bigots could ever achive.

Thank you for that calm explanation. It makes a lot of sense and it helpes to think of it that way. I wish that was the tone we could use if there is a problem. We would have been able to have an actual discussion. I'm a little afraid that we are past thus point. Past the point of saving things for me in this fandom. I would have liked to know abput the problems. But not through posts that were so harsh and partially written by people who were proud not to have even read the story.

[whatwashernameagain]

Thank you friend. This submission really helped me feel better. Support is rare these days 😅 for the past months I was thinking about ways to introduce the racism issues the police are facing and was planning to let Ro and Lo slowly recognize the issues of the police to the point of resigning from the force. And then this happened. Perhaps i'll still do that if there is interest. There might be too much hate, though. But thank you. So much.

YOUR FIC IS NOT BAD AT ALL PLEASE DO NOT STOP IT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I’m SO SO SO sorry you have to deal with this but it’s ridiculous... they’re just spewing bs and completely misunderstanding the fic!!!!!

Please oh god PLEASE do not stop the fic.... if there’s a way to make it so that comments are turned off, that might be an ok idea....

Also maybe turning off the comments on the thing you posted about the fic and the hate you’ve gotten is a good idea too, because it’s just going to drag you down.

[whatwashernameagain]

YOUR FIC IS NOT BAD AT ALL PLEASE DO NOT STOP IT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I’m SO SO SO sorry you have to deal with this but it’s ridiculous... they’re just spewing bs and completely misunderstanding the fic!!!!!

Please oh god PLEASE do not stop the fic.... if there’s a way to make it so that comments are turned off, that might be an ok idea....

Also maybe turning off the comments on the thing you posted about the fic and the hate you’ve gotten is a good idea too, because it’s just going to drag you down.

[whatwashernameagain]

I'm really sorry the fandom has been treating you like this. You clearly understood you were doing something controversial and stopped, yet the fandom dogpilled you. You really didn't deserve this, and I hope it won't cut your want to write since you were a great writer. I wish you the best of luck and wish that the fandom stopped being so utterly stupid and attacking people for no proper reasons

Thank you so much, anon. That means a lot. I don't know if i'll continue writing in the fandom. Most certainly not on tumblr. The worst thing for me was that i got attacked despite not even having reacted to an accusation. I wasn't there for any of it and that was enough to make this whole thing spiral out of control to actual death threats, just because someone thought i'd made a mistake and i was ignoring their shouting. I'm just very disappointed in the fandom. We all say it's okay to make mistakes but then i make some and it's insults and suicide baiting because some people think they deserve an apology right away. In the past people who got anon hate were supported, but the bad far outweighs the good.

But you wrote to me, and that is awesome :)

#tw suicide

[whatwashernameagain]

maybe it’s just the lesbianism but over the course of the last few months, as ive grown more secure and more at home in my sexuality, ive found increasingly that the things i like most about women are the things society hates most about us. i like our muscles. i like our bellies and the way the skin folds on the stomach. i like our shoulders, wide and strong, or small and weak. i like strong jaws and confident eyes and loud voices. i like obnoxious laughs that snort and chortle and fill the whole room with bubbles that snap and pop like bubblegum let loose. i like strength, i like a woman who takes up space, who spreads her legs and stomps her feet and grins toothily at her friends. i like a woman with dimples. i like a woman with freckles and blemishes and acne scars, with stretch marks and hairy legs and curves where they don’t like them and straight lines where they do. i like a bony girl, i like the way the clavicle looks, i like the gap between the neck and the shoulder, i like the way sunlight catches on the sweat hanging from the peachfuzz on the upper lip…i like a lot of things about women that society told me to hate about us…realizing i was a lesbian revealed to me the beauty in “ugly” things that i had never considered before. none of these traits is something i “work past” when falling for a girl — they are things i love just as much on a woman as society loves a woman’s long hair or perfect curves. the so-called “"imperfections”“ only serve to captivate me more.

[whatwashernameagain]

In a world that wants to shove advertisements in our face every second of every day, do you realize how significant it is that AO3 doesn’t host ANY ads? They make NO revenue from the traffic they receive or from users in any way.

You might not even realize how exhausting it is to be bombarded with advertising all the time. Just look at FFN. You can’t read anything on the mobile version of the site without having to scroll past huge adds in the middle of a fic or between reviews. You can’t watch a YouTube video without encountering ads at the beginning of the video, the middle of the video, and/or the end of the video. With influencer culture, most YouTube videos are advertisements.

But AO3 is an ad-free space created by fans for fans. They ask for donations to keep running and to pay for lawyers (to protect our right to produce fannish works), what, twice a year? And no one profits off that money. Because AO3 is part of a non-profit organization….

Anway, I’m still baffled by the people out there who think AO3 is an evil organization out to scam people.

The purity wank stuff is another matter altogether.

[whatwashernameagain]

[whatwashernameagain]

And you'll notice that the people threatening them are never labeled as "terrorists".

[whatwashernameagain]

Idk if I’m following the right people but the internet is deadass silent about Kipo and has been even though it ended.

I’ll still toot this horn of mine but everyone screams about rep and diversity and the noise people make about this show is like hearing a pin drop in an empty room compared to she-ra and BOTH shows are good and I don’t get it.

[whatwashernameagain]

The fact that nobody is talking about Secret’s new commercials pisses me off

[whatwashernameagain]

🎥 The Film Crew by Aimee La Joie

Fifty-nine seconds of bliss!

[whatwashernameagain]

Defending Thomas's Patreon-

-as someone with a BA in English.

So, I have seen a lot of people hating on Thomas and Co because they opened a Patreon. Here's my two cents on the matter:

"Good job Thomas and Co for realizing what you need and acting upon it." - Me

"But Kristen," some of you might say, "they don't post a whole lot and 99% of their fanbase comprises of children. Why would anyone give Thomas and Co money? They're just posting infrequently and milking us for money. Why would I give them money?"

Let me rebut your statement with a few words:

That's entirely the point of the Patreon.

As I said, I'm a writer and a performer. 99% of my friends work in the arts as musicians, artists, writers, performers, teachers, etc. We are in a field where people demand stuff from us, yet refuse to take us seriously. From talking to my friends, they do not have a stable income. Most money comes from gigs, large projects, and even donations. They do not have a stable income from month to month. Sometimes they can afford to spend a few extra dollars on stuff they need, whereas other months they don't even know if they can pay rent.

Patreon can give them the stable income that many of us artists need.

Having an unstable income means that projects have to be scrapped, rewritten, or revised on a new schedule in order to offset costs. I wouldn't be surprised if there is content we haven't seen because the Co couldn't afford to make it.

Another thing you may not know about me is that I did film club in high school. I was in two fifty-minute movies. Let me tell you, there's so much that you don't see. This is just the bare bones of the life cycle of a script:

Idea(s)

Research

First draft

Script edits/more research(x however long it takes to create a final draft)

Filming on/off set (and some script changes)

Compiling the good takes and stringing them into a first draft of the video

Special effects add-ins

Creating cleaner transitions

Music overlay

Final touches

Now you may say

"Ten steps? That's all?"

This is the BARE MINIMUM. There's plenty more steps to this. Not to mention, these take place over the course of MONTHS. AND health needs to be addressed - Co can't spend every day working. They have their own lives. It's dangerous for them to put their health on the back burner in order for them to finish a vid a few weeks early.

Not to mention - fans only see the final draft. You see the final product and think: "That's it? Why did it take so long?" And I, the artist, thinks: "Oh god, I can't believe it only took us 53 drafts to finally settle the plot."

Creating content is not easy and I think a lot of you forget that.

The whole point of the Patreon is to help them be able to have a strong foundation. This way they can have more elaborate costumes, sets, and props. This way they can comission people. You remember "Learning New Things About Ourselves?" The puppet episode? Two people were comissioned for that. Remus's costume? Comissioned. The last Aside? Comissioned.

We all gotta pay bills, that's why a lot of people turn to Patreon as a solid resource so they can have a monthly income. This is how they begin to create a regular schedule. This is how creators can finally have stability in their lives.

A stable income will make it easier for the Co to create stronger schedules and, possibly, more frequent vids. I cannot stress enough that artists cannot do what they do without having some sense of stability. If we don't have a stable income, we won't have a stable schedule. It's as simple as that.

(As a side note: YouTube takes up to 30% of YouTube Memberships whereas Patreon takes only 5%. It makes sense for them to switch platforms.)

As for the other half - that this fandom is mainly kids - no it is not. I have met so many Fanders at college and, heck, most of the Fanders in the discord I frequent are around my age (22). But, that's not really something that is important.

I recently graduated college. I get it, money is tight, especially now. But, this also means money is tight for artists. Broadway is closed till June 2021, my musician friends have lost most of their income, and my other artist friends are currently unemployed. Trust me, I know things are hard. Thomas and Co have said time and time again that your support is enough. You sharing their content, commenting on their vids, and showing the Co support is enough. You don't need to spend money. What you are doing is helping boost their vids in the algorithm and helping the content reach more people.

Lastly, stop sharing Patreon content if you are a patron. It is hurting everyone. When you leak content, people are more likely to not buy a tier because they can get the same thing for free via a leak. This in turn hurts Thomas and Co and causes them to lose money. You're also showing your fellow patrons that you don't care about them. They are paying for content and are disrespecting them by giving it to people who haven't paid.

Stop bashing Thomas and Co for this decision. Just because you like them doesn't mean you are entitled to their content. I think a lot of this fandom needs to learn to step into other people's perspectives and stop taking their own lives as what the basis of everyone else's is like.

This move makes sense. A lot of you are looking at it as a fan and are viewing the Co as people who just make content. You need to step into their shoes and think about what it is like to create content in the year 2020.

[whatwashernameagain]