werestillscreamin

[werestillscreamin]

“Things don’t have purposes, as if the universe were a machine, where every part has a useful function. What’s the function of a galaxy? I don’t know if our life has a purpose and I don’t see that it matters. What does matter is that we’re a part. Like a thread in a cloth or a grass-blade in a field. It is and we are. What we do is like wind blowing on the grass. […] We’re in the world, not against it. […] The world is, no matter how we think it ought to be. You have to be with it. You have to let it be.”

— Ursula Le Guin, The Lathe of Heaven (via exhaled-spirals)

[werestillscreamin]

Perfect quote of the day from my guru. Three years ago my abusive mom killed herself. She struggled with severe and debilitating pain as well as mental illness. And she lost. Now I don't have to live in fear of her, but for some reason I still do. I remember three years ago I was just so mad because if she was always going to end up killing herself, what was I doing wasting my entire life living in fear of her? What was actually so terrifying, besides the abuse she dealt me? Idk, I'm not mad at her anymore, but I haven't forgiven her either. I feel perfectly fine with this decision. Forgiveness is changed behavior. My mother never truly apologized for what she did to me, and she never will now.

I had a very nice therapy session today, and I got a nice hug from my therapist. Now, I'm enjoying some of my favorite cookies after walking to get my medicine from the store. My mom is missing out on an absolutely splendid beautiful day today, it's such a tragedy. And, I almost missed out on this splendid beautiful day. I'm so scared for this coming winter. I don't know if I'll see next spring.

But, it's because of how I keep labeling each and every experience as either good or bad, instead of seeing that experiences have no quality about them. They are just there. Like I'm still here.

Just, how wonderful. Everything is fine and nothing is wrong. Aum, shanti shanti shanti. 🙏

#personal rambling #I don't really have anyone to talk to about this. I don't want to really get into anything deep about the topic #But I'd still like some support if anyone would like to send me some good vibes #That's all I need to not feel alone today

[werestillscreamin]

[werestillscreamin]

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Sokka's girlfriend looked great today.

[werestillscreamin]

wheres the smiling blackfoot family i want to see the smiling blackfoot family

[werestillscreamin]

the work printer cries out, "no stop, that's too much! youre gonna make me jam!" as i load a full ream into her tray, but it's too late. "see, you can take it. you're doing such a good job for me." i coo into her feeding tray as i begin printing the morning reports. her warning lights turn red as she moans in i assume ecstacy

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[werestillscreamin]

[werestillscreamin]

yesterday i was ringing up an old man at work and he asked if i wanted to see his pride and joy, pulled out his wallet, and in the place where you’d keep a picture of like your family he had this

[werestillscreamin]

it’s okay to “fail”. it’s okay to make mistakes. it’s okay to learn.

[werestillscreamin]

So I started working again today, and me and my coworker had to squeeze lemons which usually is a really un fun job but TODAY. We had the mostly lovely batch of lemons to work with. So we rated how smoothly they cut and how nice the insides of them looked for about an hour. An absolutely marvelous time I gotta say

[werestillscreamin]

It’s crazy how low self-worth fucks with peoples lives

[werestillscreamin]

If you’re reading this I want you to know that it’s okay to change your purpose and your goals, you are allowed to make your own future 

[werestillscreamin]

by yung_pueblo

[werestillscreamin]

When I was in the hospital, they gave me a big bracelet that said ALLERGY, but like. I'm allergic to bees. Were they going to prescribe me bees in there.

[werestillscreamin]