todays-emergency

[todays-emergency]

I know I've said it before but fuck I hate holidays! It really brings out the stupid in people

#911 dispatcher #911 #dispatch #holidays #july 04 #fourth of july #julyfourth

[todays-emergency]

Had some dude call 911 and tell us that the woods were on fire. We send the fire department who told us it was literally a candle by the side of the road

#911 dispatcher #911 #dispatch #fire dept #candle #i hate dumb motherfuckers

[todays-emergency]

So I was call taking for the night and the 911 line rings and I answer it. All I hear is very loud static. At one point the static lowers in volume before increasing again. No one replies when I speak there's just loud static. My coworker tries calling the number and only gets a voicemail saying to call a corporate number. She calls the corporate number and they inform us that some of their employees work from home but they don't know anything about a 911 call.

So I put the call in and send an officer to the address that the call mapped out at. It was a landline so the address was pretty much guaranteed to be accurate. The officer goes to the house and wakes up the man sleeping there. The man knows nothing about a 911 call, he doesn't even have a landline. Then the officer tells him the actual phone number that called 911. That phone number used to belong to the man's wife, it was her work number. They had disconnected it several months prior...after she died. So yeah, that was weird.

#911 #dispatch #ghost? #i mean i don't really believe in ghosts but

[todays-emergency]

So this man called in to ask if someone called the police on him because he and his wife were arguing. I ask him to repeat himself because he was confusing me a bit the way he was saying things. I hear a woman in the background who tells him to call 911.

"This is 911" he says

"That's a Chinese woman" she yells

Y'all...I'm a born and raised red headed South Carolinian. The fuck?

#911 #dispatch #911 dispatcher #chinese #woman #i can't #😂

[todays-emergency]

So I've started working at the 911 dispatch center. Why do I do these things to myself?

#911 #dispatch #new job

[todays-emergency]

I'm finally quitting my job! My last day is the 15th. I'm so happy 😃😭😃😭😃😭

#quitting #can't wait #freedom #hospitals suck #i hate the er #need a change

[todays-emergency]

Clerk: what brings you to the ER tonight?

Patient: *mumbles* m baknmleg

C: what?

P: m baknmleg

C: you're backin' your leg?

P: yes

C: what do you mean you're backin' your leg?

P: it hurts!

C: do you mean the back OF your leg?

P: *finally enunciating* NO! MY BACK HURTS AND MY LEG HURTS!

#ER #emergency room #speak up #don't mumble

[todays-emergency]

If your local ER recognizes you they probably hate you

[todays-emergency]

Why do you insist on trying to talk to me when I'm wearing headphones? 🙄🙄🙄

[todays-emergency]

I'm tired of y'all coming into the ER for your chronic bullshit that you already have a diagnosis for and you're not experiencing any acute symptoms of

#non emergency #emergency room #er #chronic bullshit #exasperated #fucking tired

[todays-emergency]

When I tell you each patient is only allowed one visitor why would you leave and let the boyfriend stay? Your child is a minor! She cannot receive treatment without you here dumbass!

#er #emergency room #dumbass

[todays-emergency]

Me: Hi, how can I help you

Patient's Mother: she got in a fight with a cat

Me: ...what?

PM: she got in a fight with a cat and says she wants to get her scratches checked out. Show her your scratches

16 yr old patient: *pulls down the top of her pants before I can tell her I don't need to see it to reveal... stretch marks*

#ER #emergency room #non emergency #cats #cat scratches #stretch marks #how stupid you gotta be? are you competing olympically?

[todays-emergency]

Not even two hours into the new year and this motherfucker apparently doesn't know the date. Literally ONLY PUT THE YEAR! You can't make this shit up stg

#emergency room #ER #new year #happynewyear #2021

[todays-emergency]

PSA!!!! We DO NOT store or dispatch ambulances from the hospital! NO we cannot call them FOR you. NO there is NO OTHER NUMBER for 9-1-1! That is the number for EMERGENCY SERVICES! If you call the hospital for an ambulance not only does it not help you, not only does it waste your time, not only will we tell you to hang up and call 911, after you get off the phone we hang our heads, lose a little more faith in humanity, and let out a laugh of despair.

#psa #er #emergency room #emergency services #911 #stopcalling #seriously stop #we laugh at you #and die inside

[todays-emergency]

It's says something to me (and nothing good) that fathers will bring their child to the ER and not even know they're fucking birthday. Moms might take a minute if they have more than one kid but so many dads just full on don't know their kids birthday. This one didn't even know how to spell his kids name. Had to call mom to ask the birthday. Didn't know if the kid had been born here (kid is 2yrs old at this point but still, I'm 28 and my mom still know where she gave birth). We asked him why they were here today and he said he didn't know. Are you fucking kidding me. I hate men

[todays-emergency]

[todays-emergency]

This would make my life so much easier. Plz wear masks. Like all the time.