#you wasted it! you wasted all 20 episodes on the fucking 1950s where it was just more useless and no fucking resolution

[theriverdalereviewer]

read the riverdale finale spoilers. we all crode

#what kind of a shit ending is this #no resolution no catharsis no nostalgia #just UNFUCKINGSATISFYING #roberto aguirre sacasa do you know how lucky you are #do you? that you were told ahead of time that this was your final season #and that you would have 20 episodes to pull it off #but no rather than using this opportunity to wrap up the story and the arcs and loose ends #you wasted it! you wasted all 20 episodes on the fucking 1950s where it was just more useless and no fucking resolution #now spoiler alert here #BUT THE BARCHIEJERONICA FOURSOME? #the core four all fucked each other and were in a polygamous relationship #and then they all stopped and all married someone else or died alone #I commend ras for the last time he managed to do something that satisfied nobody #like what is the point of this #this just completely renders all of the other stories as being useless #I hate this man I hate this show #6 years later and they still now how to piss me off #honestly well done

[skanecanyon]

Worms In My Pee

     I haven't had too many dreams that I would consider to be nightmares, but this one qualifies. It's probably not suitable for younger readers or people who are easily offended or grossed out, but I call them as I see them. I don't have a whole lot of control over my dreams.

      I should probably give some background about myself first. In January of 2015, I had to have a partial nephrectomy to have a cancerous tumor removed from my right kidney. They ended up having to remove about 15% of that kidney, so now I only have 1.85 kidneys. When they stitched me back up after cutting me open, they used biodegradable stitches on my kidney and surrounding muscle layers, and then they just used staples to hold my skin together until it healed. It sounds bad, but it actually worked well. Took about 2 months to fully recover. The biodegradable stitches are designed to just fall apart over time and be absorbed by the body. A few of the ones holding my kidney together though ended up working their way through the kidney, down the ureter, into the bladder, and I ultimately ended up pissing them out. I was not warned of this ahead of time however. There was just an instance one morning when I was taking a piss, and out came some tiny fragments of silk. I suspected that maybe they were stitches and my suspicions were confirmed when I talked to my urologist who told me that indeed they were stitches and that it was normal to piss a few of them out, and that I shouldn't be alarmed. It was a shocking experience though, one that is burned into my brain forever, and I'm sure it is the basis for this dream.  

     Anyway, the dream starts out with me taking a piss in the toilet of the basement bathroom as I often do. It is a sparsely equipped bathroom in the unfinished half of the basement. A small, dimly lit, unventilated bathroom with a linoleum tile floor, three cheap plywood walls and one yellow cinder block wall containing a small window toward the top that cannot be opened. It contains a toilet, a small sink with a bare bulb porcelain light fixture above it, a 1950s era medicine cabinet and a waste basket. Although this bathroom has all the charms of a prison cell, I use this toilet frequently because, oddly enough, although the toilet is below ground, it has much greater flushing power than the one upstairs. So in my dream, I'm standing there taking a piss when all the sudden I notice something in the water. It looks like a small piece of stitching, like what I actually experienced in real life a few years earlier. It is about a quarter inch long at most. I didn't see it actually come out my penis, I only noticed it afterwards, so I was unsure what it was or where it came from, but I felt compelled to somehow scoop it out of the piss-water for closer examination. 

     I looked around the bathroom for something I could use to scoop it out with, but couldn't find anything at first. Then I looked back into the toilet bowl. Now the fragment was larger than before. Now it appears to be a small twig or something, slightly bent, about 1-2 inches long. I'm thinking, what the fuck is going on here? I must be losing my mind. Again my focus turns to finding something to scoop it out with. For a moment, I think about just picking it out with my hand, but quickly decide that would be too gross. After a brief search, I look back in the bowl again. Now the think seems to be alive! It appears to be a small, thin earthworm, wiggling and stretching, and trying to climb up the side of the bowl, but it can't. Now I'm kind of freaking out. How the fuck did this thing suddenly become animated?

     As I stand there wondering what to do (I could have just flushed it, but for some reason I didn't), I notice a Pyrex liquid measuring glass sitting on top of the medicine cabinet. It's being used to hold pens and pencils, as well as some other random things. I grab it and dump the contents out on the floor. Way more ends up spilling out than what the 2 cup capacity measuring glass is capable of holding. Not only are there pens and pencils, but there also appears to be quite a few other random things, including tooth brushes, loose change, paper clips and even a couple of pill bottles. One of the pill bottles is quite large, almost as large as the measuring cup itself. 

     Then I turn my attention back to the toilet bowl. The water has turned from a clear, piss yellow color to an opaque, milky yellow color. The worm has multiplied and gotten bigger. There are a few of them in there now, each about the size of a night crawler, twisting, squirming and stretching in the water. Some are trying to climb up the inside of the bowl. It's hard to tell how many there are because the water is so cloudy now. I dip the measuring cup into the water and scoop up a bunch of them. There must have been at least 20 of them in the glass, all squirming and reaching, trying to get out of the cup. In order to contain them, I grabbed the large pill bottle and put it on top of them. This caused them all to stop moving for a second, but then they soon resumed their squirming. One of them pushed past the pill bottle, reached its way out of the glass and started to wrap itself around one of my fingers on the hand I was using to hold the measuring cup. This freaked me out and caused me to drop the whole thing back into the toilet bowl.

      It was here that I must have woke up. In real life, I had been sleeping on the bed in the finished part of the basement. I often take naps down there because that's where my computer is, and it's nice and cool downstairs. Relived that it was all just a dream, I got up and actually went to take a piss in the very toilet I had just dreamed about. Thankfully, there were no worms involved (although that basement bathroom is known to harbor some impressively large centipedes. I didn't see any this time). Then I crawled back into bed, fell asleep again, and continued dreaming.

      The next dream is very short, but it is unique in that it references the first dream. Not a continuation of it, but a reference to it. I don't think this has ever happened to me before. In it, I am with two of my friends and we're driving on our way to go see a concert. I can even tell you the name of the band. It's Bring Me The Horizon. I'm sure I'm dreaming this because they play these guys all the time on 93X in the morning. There's a couple of songs they do that I like. Anyway, the concert is being held in a house somewhere and we're driving around trying to find it. I'm in the back seat and my friends are in the front seat. As we're driving around, I'm trying to tell this story about how I had a dream in which I pissed worms, but before I can even finish a sentence, my friend keeps butting in and sarcastically finishing it for me in the form of a question. He's doing this to be a smart ass. I keep telling him "No, no...just shut up and listen to me," but he keeps doing it until I finally say, "okay, whatever...I'm not going to tell you about it then."

      Next thing I know, we finally find the house and go inside. There are a lot of people sitting around, but there doesn't seem to be any indication that there is going to be a concert. We're roaming around this house looking for the concert, but we can't find it. All the rooms are different, and there seems to be an inordinate number of them for your average house. We're navigating our way past people, through hallways and rooms, up and down stairs, but we can't find this concert. People are looking at us like they're wondering what we're doing there. It felt like the scene from Spinal Tap when they were wandering around lost trying to find the stage. This is about all I can remember. We never do find the concert. I'd also like to point out that being lost and/or trying to find my way is a very common theme in my dreams. So there must be some deep seated psychological issue there. Anyway, I hope you've enjoyed this episode of fucked up things from my subconscious. Have a great day. If you ever piss worms, see your doctor immediately.

#dreams