#you owe me reparations for emotional damage also- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

echthr0s · 1 year

Note

was typing 30% but then it went up to 31% so both…… maybe 30 for Dayir and 31 for Ishan??

thank you for choosing characters lol :p if I got Gabriel in the RNG again I was gonna do some kind of elaborate fkn pirouette off the handle

What would hurt your character so badly they couldn't even breathe?

WELL wouldn't you know it, the very canon presents us with approximately 30 events that would be perfect answers for this-- (Squenix owes me reparations for emotional damage 💀)

in general the kinds of situations that tend to wound Dayir most deeply are: unfair/unjust death of a loved one, feeling abandoned or rejected or forgotten by her loved ones, and seeing the unexpectedly horrific consequences of a choice she'd made in good faith. more esoteric situations that might evoke this feeling are: certain Echo visions, being flooded with Azem memories (it's not so much the content of the memories in this case, but the depth of all that she'd loved and lost as Azem, all that she'd been and done, it's just overwhelming), and being consumed by fuckin Light, thanks Emet-Selch

also, when Zenos rammed the hilt of his sword into her solar plexas that one time. definitely had to wheeze and gasp her way through the rest of that interaction

What is guaranteed to make this character smile?

our beloved mr grumpy gills Ishan the Terrible will only smile for people in his inner circle. if you're one of those people, then you can probably coax a smile out of him by teasing him (if you're funny enough to pull it off, otherwise you just get the withering unblinking stare), doing a crazy bard's-tale type reenactment of something he'd done recently (Thancred is good at this), giving him a really strong tight hug, or, well, you know. offering him some sloppy

protip: if you want to get the contented-cat slow-blink smile (yeah somehow Zenos doesn't have a monopoly on this expression, although he's the one that's most known for it amongst the Scions and friends), give him a good scritch between his braids or play with his ears

#i'm kidding about gabriel btw i love him but it's just funny that i keep rolling him #also: fuckin zenos lmfao. god #.dayir #.ishan #general oc tag #thank 🌻

4 notes · View notes

findingtheperfectcharacter · 4 years

Text

Hiding from the spotlight

Unsymp October 1!

Tw: Child abuse (physical manhanding a child and emotionally being terrible, and ignoring their wants, unsymp Patton, Symp everyone else, child!sides (the twins and Virgil are 10.), implied Loceit

@unsympathetic-october-2020

Logan hated these kinds of things. So many child fears in one room, he could see the way some of their bodies sat stiffly in their chairs. Or how others clung to their parents. The subtle shake in their voices as they practiced their lines. According to Keysers and Parrett 2004's study on monkeys, similar neurons are released when people do an action to when they see an action occurring. This explained why seeing those children in this state made his stomach twist into metaphorical knots.

He couldn't stand it and led the twins to a smaller out-of-the-way hallway.The 10-year-olds were practicing their dance for the car jingle with practiced ease. He could still remember the day when they first made that PowerPoint listing the reasons why they should be allowed to audition professionally and what could he say, one slide of, "it'll be fun" one of "It'll keep me from stealing" and 18 more slides of 'please, pretty please' and puppy dog faces... It was an extremely compelling.

"I don't want to be here." He heard a voice mutter. He turned and found a child in a black hoodie and a cloud shaped pin gripping the edge of his jeans. He was younger than his own boys, or at the very least smaller. His eyes flickered back and forth, anxiously looking around it seemed like he was trying to hide from something.

"Where's your guardian?" Logan asked, the child shook his head and clung to his leg, "Please no, please no, don't let him find me."

Logan was frankly bewildered by this situation and mildly uncomfortable with this child gripping onto his leg, but he couldn't help but have pity for him as he began to weep. He shook him off so he could kneel down and look into his black eyes.

"What's your name?" Logan asked.

The child sniffed and played with the strings of his hoodie, "Virgil."

Logan nodded, "Well Virgil, I have no legal authority to separate you from your guardian and frankly there are too many witnesses for me to do so and get away with it. A Far more reasonable thing for me to do at the moment is to talk to your guardian about the situation as an adult on your behalf."

Virgil's eyes widened, sparkling in the light, "You'd really do that for me?"

He nodded, he thought it wouldn't be too difficult to convince his guardian to let Virgil not do the audition. Virgil took his hand and led him to the bathrooms where a man with a baby blue polo was fretting. The man's face lit up and he hugged Virgil, picking him up and spinning him.

"Virgy! Oh dear why did you run away like that?" He turns to Logan, a brilliant smile on his face, "I'm so sorry for all of this trouble." Virgil's guardian tried to pet his short black curls but the child turned away, so he gripped his head with one hand and forced Virgil's head to his chest. "My name's Patton," he held out his hand.

Logan didn't take it, "Your child, Virgil. He sharred with me the fact that he does not wish to be here. As a fellow parent, I suggest that you quit the auditions for the sake of his health. I would also suggest that you don't touch him unless he wishes to be touched."

Patton laughed, "Is this how you get all the parents to quit?" He kisses Virgil's cheek, "We're prepared for a little competition and we're totally going to wow those judges right sweetie."

Virgil stayed quiet until Patton flicked him, "Virgey! Pay attention, what did poppa just say?"

"We're gonna wow the judges." His voice was barely audible.

Patton booped his nose, "That's right you are you little star! Oh! That rhymes! Neat!" He turns his attention back to Logan, "Where are your kids anyway?"

Logan cursed mentally, it was not typical of him to get caught up in these kinds of things- but he did. He ran down the hall to see Remus, seconds from hitting Roman on the shoulder with his toy morning star.

"Remus." He said and the boy immediately dropped it.

"HE STARTED IT!"

"WHAT?! No I didn't, you did with your giant oaf feet!"

"At least my feet taste good."

"What does that- what do you mean?!"

"Do you peanut butter toe soak?"

Logan rubbed his temple, as the boys continued to speak, "Court is now in session."

The twins huffed and sat down quietly. Logan pointed at Roman, "Roman, you have the stands."

And so the conversation went on with the children defending themselves and cross examining each other until a decision could be made. After the final verdict (Remus owed Roman an apology for enacting violence in this case as it was not self defense even if Roman's words were cruel and Roman promised not to insult him for 2 weeks as reparations for emotional damages.)

As soon as the argument ended Roman blurted out, "So who was that creepy kid you were talking to?"

Remus bumped him, "You're not supposed to call people creepy."

"But he was! He looked like a Vampire... Do you think that's why he was wearing that hood? Dad are you a vampire now?!"

"Can you imagine how cool it would be to have a bloodsucked as a dad?! Think he'd bite me, I wanna see how sharp those teeth are!" He made a biting motion in the air.

Logan cleared his throat, "Actually boys, that kid's name is Virgil and I think he's in big trouble. The kind of trouble daddy fixes."

Roman grinned, "Ooooh solving crimes? Can we help?"

Logan ruffled his hair, "Leave this one to me Princey, I think getting you two involved will only lead to more trouble."

..................

"I-IeeEe Virgil's voice came in as an offkey whine. The pianist looked at him with a smile, "Go on kid, take your time." Patton was in the audience and gave him a big thumbs up, "I" his eyes began welling up with tears.

Patton looked at Virgil than the judges and said, "May I talk with him, just for a second. It's his first audition and I think my kiddo just got a little stage fright." The one on the far left shrugged, Virgil whimpered when he grabbed his arm and dragged him offstage.

"What is wrong with you? Do you like embarrassing me is that it? Do you like making me look like I can't handle my kid? This is two times today!" Virgil mouthed out a small I'm sorry. Patton laughed a louder, harsher sound than anything he did in public, "If you were sorry you wouldn't have done it. Stupid brat," he gripped Virgil's arm more tightly, "I'm giving you the world and all you want to do is whine and complain, whine and complain every goddamn second. 'I don't wanna do sports poppa, I don't wanna do art poppa. You're useless! And too old to be crying like this." Virgil's breath hitched in between sobs as Patton grabbed his shoulders, "Stop crying and do something!"

Logan burst into the hallway, a shining blue light in the darkness, Patton straightened his shirt, "Oh hi! It's you again, how did your kids do-"

"The feeling's far from mutual. I just felt the need to inform you that my husband is a lawyer for cases of child abuse and everything you just said and did was caught on camera." He showed Patton his iphone, to his utter horror, Logan couldn't help the beam on his face as he watched the man's eyes grow to the size of dinner plates. He pat his shoulder and gave a small nod to Virgil, who seemed equally awe-struck.

"I reccomend you contact your lawers as soon as you can."

And with that, Logan walked away, confident that soon Virgil would be safe. He looked down at his own kids and smiled at the thought of the quiet black haired boy finding a family of his own.

#Tw child abuse #Unsympathetic Patton #Ask to tag #Virgil angst

26 notes · View notes

khiphop-discussions · 4 years

Note

Weird question, but would you ever date a khh person? You've met a whole bunch of rappers already, so who would it be in a perfect world?

I definitely would tbQh. I have quite a few crushes not gonna lie lol.

EDIT: I wrote this sentence after writing literally everything else in this post and I just wanted to say that this is weirdly WAYYY more thought out than I expected it to be lol.

I would say...Gray. Dog kissing aside, he’s hella cute, has a lot of money, seems stable as a person, isn’t always on some nonsense. Only problem (besides the aforementioned dog kissing) is that he’s out of my age range. We have an 11 year age difference (he’s turning 34 in December). I’m not an age gap type.

One. I like him. He’s handsome and seems like a cool dude. But he seems like he might lie and he said himself that he tends to just merge into whatever a girlfriend wants. That’s not really a good trait. Appears as if he doesn’t know himself and what he wants so as a result he is easy to get swayed by other people. He doesn’t know what he wants (which would include you) so your relationship would always be contentious. Also, I’m not sure what the money is like either. It seems like he could have a bunch of debt since he’s been under 3 labels, the 3rd one being his own that he either had to take out loans for or fund 100% with his own pocket money. That said, he’s hella handsome so I know the endorsement deal money would always be coming in even if his music flopped at some point.

Kid Milli - I would date him. He seems like a cool dude, he’s cute enough (he’s not conventionally attractive but A LOT of women like him. I’m guessing it’s the style and his face being an acquired taste but not a HARD one to acquire you know? At least that’s the case with me). He also has money. He seems like he spends a bit reckless though so I’d have to keep an eye out on that. That said, I suspect Milli will be around for a while and probably find a way to keep making money cause he seems like he has that hustler’s spirit. Nondisclothes is doing pretty good too. He could be like another Swings and open up a million different freaking businesses.

Coogie - I’d probably mess with him too tbh. He’s cute. Good personality and sense of humor. A lot of people like him. He’s not super rich yet but I think he’s living comfortable and making money. Especially since he has writing credits with SM artists, even if his music flops he’ll always have income because THEIR’S won’t. Only problem is he has LOTS of female fans and he gives off playboy energy. His songs he got famous off of all have references to basically being a fuckboy. Also, (I didn’t mention this with Milli but it applies to him too) he knows/is friends with so many people in KHH that if I was to ever break up with him I probably couldn’t date other KHH rappers even if we clicked. It’d be awkward as hell for everyone. Plus, who really wants to date a girl/boy that their friend already dated? Gray and One have a bit more of an exclusivity factor so it’s not as awkward if we were to ever break up.

DPR Live - He’s handsome but I feel like he’s more “pretty boy-ish” these days. Either way I find it attractive. Also, he comes of as a really genuine and cool person to be around. Then there’s the way he talks about women...he’s do damn dreamy. It seems like everything would be romantic and he would treat you SOOO well. He also has a certain level of an exclusivity factor as well so dating others after him wouldn’t be an issue (Actually the issue would likely be that no one else in KHH could ever measure up to what you got out of a relationship with him lol). Only problem is that I feel like his money is probably tied up since he’s independent. That means the financial burden of whatever has to do with his career is his and DPR’s pretty much. So who knows how much debt or how much profit he’s actually seeing. I think he does pretty well for himself though especially since he doesn’t seem to spend on stupid shit like pretty much everyone else on this list (besides Gray. But when he was their age I’m sure he spent a lot of money on dumb shit as well lol) so he’s probably good with finances. He’ll likely be better off financially than some of the rappers who might make more because he doesn’t spend it just because he has it. Also, I feel like out of everybody on this list we would probably make the most sense as a couple (even though realistically, me and no one on this lists makes ANY type of sense as a couple).

Side Note: But I told y’all I have a thing for Kris Wu as of late. I would date him too lol

I literally cannot see myself with anyone else in KHH. Everyone else seems highly incompatible (and like I said everybody I listed ALREADY makes no damn sense based on what I currently know about them and me as individuals) based on the little I currently know.

Side Note 2: People are probably gonna be like “She talks about money so much” but I’m NOT a gold digger or anything. I TRULY believe that women should have their own money so as soon as dudes start acting up they can leave. However, I do think that women need to understand that dudes (realistically) already DO owe them money (reparations for patriarchy) but also through the relationship you will likely end up dealing with more labor than him (possible wanted or unwanted pregnancies, higher risk of contracting an STD, higher risk of losing reputation, emotional labor, possibly labor around the house, HIGH possibility of intimate partner violence, added to the fact that they are rappers and they tend to cheat which is basically emotional abuse + emotional damage, etc.) but then there’s also the fact that should you ever marry these guys you take on all of the debt they may have (which is why I made that point for Milli and One but it really applies to all of them). So you should be getting something tangible out the deal.

#asks #Anonymous

11 notes · View notes

christaurman-blog · 5 years

Text

Bipolar Relarionships: How To grow stronger as a couple.

JOIN!

HOME>BIPOLAR & MARRIAGE: HOW TO GROW STRONGER AS A COUPLE

Bipolar & Marriage: How to Grow Stronger as a Couple

BY bp Magazine

113 COMMENTS

26,530

VIEWS

When a mental illness suddenly appears in a partnership, it can shake the foundation of a marriage. While dealing with the erratic behavior of a spouse in mania or depression is difficult, through counseling, love and acceptance of the illness, partners can grow even stronger as a couple.

Mood changes

It’s stressful for a spouse to deal with the confusion of ever-changing moods from their partner that has bipolar. It helps for this spouse to view their continued support as an investment in something worthwhile.

Confusion and chaos

When symptoms of bipolar first begin to surface, most spouses aren’t sure what to think—they’re very confused. Amid the chaos of behaviors they fear they’ll never see the person they’d fallen in love with again.

When sympathy isn’t enough

When a spouse is first diagnosed, the initial response from their partner is usually sympathy––until anger, frustration and even hate arise down the road, according to sociology professor and author David A. Karp, Ph.D. Karp remarks that “caring for someone who has a mental illness can be more draining than caring for someone with cancer.” When a spouse with bipolar denies their diagnosis, it can cause even more frustration and anger, and make the well partner feel like ‘the enemy’ for even breaching the topic.

Reach acceptance

If a spouse can move through these times, he or she will reach a place of acceptance, says Karp. “Those difficult emotions will then be replaced with softer feelings of love and compassion.” Just because life with your spouse looks different from the one you originally imagined, it doesn’t mean you can’t still have a loving, fulfilled life.

Redefine spousal expectations

Acceptance also means redrawing the picture of what your life as a couple looks like. For some, that may mean having to rely on only one income, going without certain luxuries, or even choosing not to start a family. For others, it may mean that many of the responsibilities of daily life fall on the well partner.

Share responsibility

Couples who have the most success share the belief that the partner with bipolar and the partner without bipolar each share an equal amount of responsibility within their relationship. Bipolar is biologically based, and can be properly managed if an individual shoulders the responsibility to help themselves––unless they are extremely manic or depressed, in which cases they are temporarily unable to.

Prepare ahead

In periods of wellness, successful couples prepare for episodes that lie ahead. That may mean realigning chequing accounts or giving power of attorney as a means of limiting control to the ill spouse during manic episodes. Some couples will have a list of symptoms the bipolar spouse exhibits when on the brink of a manic or depressive episode and agree at what point to seek help, thus removing the emotions from such a decision.

Carry the burden

Following a diagnosis many spouses are left with most of the responsibilities of their life together—from caring for the children to working to pay the bills to caring for their ill partner. It’s a heavy burden for many.

Draw boundary lines

Many spouses struggle with how to help the person they love without becoming engulfed in the spouse’s misery or mania. They may even feel their own identifies are being buried, and they are losing themselves or jeopardizing their own health. Spouses must learn to draw a boundary line, or risk losing themselves, Dr. Karp says.

Mutual wellness

Many couples attribute their successful marriages to a commitment to mutual and personal wellness. This could mean daily exercise, eating well, good sleep habits or focusing on the wonderful things shared by both. If both partners wholeheartedly want their relationships to work, they will find ways to make it work.

Move forward

Dr. David A. Karp argues that sometimes the well spouse has to withdraw. It may sound harsh, but it’s for the sake of their health. He says spouses must learn to take care of themselves before they can take care of others. It’s important for the well spouse to fulfill their own goals, and continue to move forward, even when their partner is struggling.

Learn more:

9 Life Lessons We Can Learn From People With Bipolar Disorder

The Best Things You Can Do For A Friend With Bipolar Disorder

4 Caregiver Tips When Dealing With Bipolar Disorder

LOVE, MARRIAGE, RELATIONSHIPS, SPOUSE, SUPPORT

113 COMMENTS

Hannah July 14, 2019 at 9:00 pm

I am looking for support for my marriage and my husband. He was diagnosed after a breakdown and stay in the hospital. He has used drugs before we were married and a blamed the drugs assuming he had started using again but when he tested clean I felt shame for even assuming that. I want to help him but still help myself (I have mdd and very high anxiety and numerous other health issues) and keep our marriage strong.

J June 7, 2019 at 3:54 pm

My wife of 25+ years was recently diagnosed with BP 2, which isn’t as severe but can be more insidious. She was diagnosed with depression 20 years ago and has been on anti-depressants since. A few months ago, she announced she was looking for jobs in different cities to get away from her mother who had abused her as a child and to continue working in her field. I supported the move because she had been so miserable and thought I would join her (or she would return) within a year. I found out afterwards she was actually having an affair with a man she knew from high school and had moved to be with him. This was shockingly out of character for her and when confronted, she chose to return home immediately and seek treatment. I love her deeply, but I’m having trouble understanding how much of her behavior was a result of the disease and how much was genuine feelings for the other man.

Discouraged January 14, 2019 at 10:19 am

I’m struggling because I am the one with Bp II. My husband is getting very discouraged. He feels alone. I have a hard time not taking that personally. The illness is changing our marriage. I feel like I’m the one ruining it. I am gettin treatment but finding the right medicine is exhausting. I either have horrible side effects or it doesn’t work.

How do I help my husband when I can barely function myself? I constantly worry he’s just going to give up on me. He’s so down. He’s not a crier but he’s been crying often. I just hold him but I lose it too because I’m the cause of his pain. My “up” results in so much irritability and unwarranted nitpicking. I know I have a choice. I apologize when I recognize it but I know it’s not enough for someone living with someone like me.

Does anyone have any advice? I’ve only been diagnosed for around 6 months. We’ve been married for 3 years with a 1.5 year old daughter.

Maria February 14, 2019 at 11:45 pm

The best thing is to continue to work and managing the illness. Don’t stop your meds and therapy helps. For your husband, be supportive and encourage him to seek counseling, a support group and self-care. Have him involved in your therapy to work through together so he can identify triggers and know what he can do to help. You may want to check out the book “Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder” by Julie Fast. It’s a great starting point to understanding the illness along with tips on how to navigate as a couple.

Joanne March 31, 2019 at 9:29 am

Hi Maria, just read your post of when you were diagnosed. About your spouses struggling with your bipolar disorder. I was diagnosed 10 years ago. Marital struggles aren’t an easy subject. I think we are just getting used to the issues. My husband does spend a lot of time away from home, but he probably needs too.im sorry I can’t give you specific solution to the problem. Just that you are not alone in this. And apparently I’m not either. There are always situations that creep up that I didn’t expect to. But the “me time” that I have is definitely a start. Joanne

LOAD MORE COMMENTS