#would you have done the same if Predstrogen was a cis woman?

[loveerran]

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CW suicide mention, transphobia and hate: I am a trans woman who has been out and about for about 20 years presenting as myself in public. Things are so much better now in so many ways, though I do worry about the anti-trans laws being passed. Recently, the CEO of my beloved platform Tumblr melted down over a trans woman named Predstrogen. Predstrogen was perma-banned from Tumblr, and the CEO quite possibly misgendered her very nastily (I hope not) while failing to communicate well at the very least. But, far worse, he then stalked her to X/Twitter and harassed her there – apparently using his CEO power and privileged access to out certain sexually-themed handle names she used. Regardless of what she did to get the initial ban, that would be traumatizing, having a rich, powerful man follow you around on the Internet, using his power to harass and rail on you like that. I imagine she is wondering what else he might do to her now or someday when no one is watching, because I would be. I really feel that. It brings back my trans feminine fear of men who hate us. We get under their skin in some way and they have something to prove on us. That fear they will be angry enough to do something obviously not in their own long term best interest even if it becomes publicly known. The trans panic defense is still used to justify and mitigate these responses in legal settings. And that fear of a man, in a position of power, acting violently (physically or otherwise because of who we are), is real and it happens. I was a bit triggered. There have been a lot of trans woman beaten after being with a guy and he felt guilty or like he needed to assert his masculinity, let alone someone who is just angry at you for existing. There's been a lot of trans hate and also CEO hate going around on Tumblr, including people implying or actually wishing said CEO would commit suicide or 'lowtax' himself (which means die by suicide in this context).

But Matt is also a person, with a smart, inquisitive nature and a strong work ethic that has led him to do incredible things, like founding WordPress. Those accomplishments, and the many other social justice accomplishments he might cite, excuse nothing. Doing a certain amount of good doesn’t entitle us to doing a certain amount of bad. But our Heavenly Parents love him. He is a different person now than he was 20 years ago, and he will be a different person 20 years from now. I do not think it makes us better to wish death on someone, even when they have hurt us. And I do not blame Predstrogen for anything she may be feeling at this point, and I'm not saying she or anyone else owes forgiveness. I am saying that to turn the other cheek, to love and pray for those who despitefully use and persecute us, is hard doctrine and not easy to understand. But I also believe the world needs more of it. From all of us. Right now.

#this really hurt #i appreciate the recent tumblr staff post on the subject #but if Matt used privileged access to harm someone #that is pretty serious #and my question for him would be this #would you have done the same if Predstrogen was a cis woman? #and if the answer is anything other than “yes” #you may want to re-examine your bias #and actions #transgender #love #forgiveness #doing better #changing #predstrogen