moth. teaser. (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: knights of the devil, you all are to be conquered.Â
WORD COUNT: 881Â
WARNINGS: vampire!ellie, vampirekiller!oc, a lot to come FUCK, violence⊠so blood(drinking), death, murder, gore, religion briefly,
A/N: yasss yaaas taglist?
1809
âOh, my precious darlingâŠâÂ
Red, similar to her hair; palms painted from the tips of a finger to the points of elbows; knees sunk into begrimed pili drenched with fresh maroon. Panicked breaths are accompanied by prayers, wishes of denial. Desires for death.Â
â⊠What I would give to protect youâŠâÂ
âF-Fââ
Tortured hollers are directed towards the pouring skies. Bodies. Bodies everywhere; surrounded by decay.Â
She sobs, deep from the pits of her stomach, âFather, for-forgive them! For they do notââ
Thunder claps. Lightning is being used as weapons from the Lord above, all meant to discover her and strike. The beams in the sky are intended to punish her discernment. It was a mistake. It was a mistake! Her eyes refuse to meet the battered corpse of the young babe, no more than three. Her crime was committed in a haze, blinded by starvation, all at the cost of the family before her. Villagers would deem the view a savage attack. A mutilation only made possible by the ravenous wolves after dark. The bears that protect the trees at dusk.
All on horseback, the strangers paused their ventures to inquire guidance. She swiftly became an aid for navigating the path, instructing them with a trembling finger and a blistering throat. Follow that trail to the end of the woods. Unbeknownst to their gracious eyes, she followed. Stalked after their mount for miles like the thoroughbred they ride, carried by the wind. Urged by bloodlust.Â
Her vision blurred when they tied their horseâs lariats to a nearby post that barely passed the trees. Her vision was shrouded in darkness, a substance so thick that her limbs felt trapped, even in frantic movement. Theyâd reached the end, just like sheâd promised.Â
Their screams satiated her hunger, but never hindered her guilt.Â
Demons, I tell you! All of them, demons! Witches destined to be set aflame for the masses!Â
And now she crouches over them with remorse in her chest. Remorse that will wash away her like the rainfall that pounds on her shoulders. Much like it had in the past when her purity was stolen. Another fatality.Â
1919
âHunting requires bouts of unwavering dedication. If the entirety of your being doesnât relish in the suffering of the demons walking, then you are to be shunned.â
Being the youngest hunter-to-be amongst legends, historical monuments that leave trails of prosperous victories wherever they advance, is humbling. Your mother pestered you for as long as you could remember: never, never become a hunter, being her only protest for you, her only child. She used to pray beside your bed at night when she assumed you to be asleep, praising the Creator for forbidding you sickness or poverty. You were her only treasure, a gift from the frosted heavens.Â
And the demons took her.Â
Hunters searched the unoccupied lands that surrounded your home relentlessly, but no traces of the Devilsâ were ever discovered. They attended your motherâs burial for your protection, and prepared to assist your transition into the orphanage, but you denied. You were permanently vexed. Forever vengeful.Â
I wish to become a hunter!Â
Your recruitment was immediate due to the shortage of volunteers, and that same day, you witnessed all of the treasures and memories of your childhood home â of your mother â get burned to the ground by the Hunters. No trails for the demons should go untouched by fire.Â
âIf you hesitate for even a second, youâre dead. Either by their handâŠâÂ
Something unsettled you that morning as you prepared for school. Something in the air, something underground. A heaviness in your home that you couldnât trace. Your mother ironed your skirt and pinned your hair up, brushed down the small curls around your hairline, and she eased you. The weather is changing, dear, sheâd said before wishing you well. You studied relentlessly, all while she was shredded by teeth sharp as knives. You want the Devilâs lifeless heart in the palm of your hand, risks be damned.
âOr mine. And I will not hesitate.âÂ
The overseer of your battalion, who slowly paces before his future prodigies, aura menacing, pauses in front of you. With your gaze locked forward and a lump in your throat, you gawk right on the crescent on his belt â the hunterâs insignia â your feet shuffle, shoes slightly squeaking above the wood.Â
âAre you prepared, child?âÂ
His tone is disparaging, and you swallow. Your head bobs and your breathing stutters.Â
âYes, sir.âÂ
He crouches before you and your cells stiffen, elbows perched on his knees, eyes finally level with yours. You appear stoic due to the grinding of your teeth, inspecting the stitched scar that sprouts at his right brow and crosses his eye.
âYou are nothing,â He hisses, and your heart clenches, âYou are not a child, and I am not your elder. Any identity you held prior to your arrival is worthless, now. We are vessels for the greatest power above. Hunter is your only name, do you understand?âÂ
No verbiage escapes you. It couldnât with how your breath trembles, so you nod once; Quite mechanic.Â
âStand straight.âÂ
His conviction forces your shoulders into alignment, and snickers from the older prodigies erupt from behind you. Your cheeks warm and your palms drip. The overseer rises to his feet once more.
âThat goes for all of you!â He shouts, and the room is quiet.
The crescent sparkles under the yellow candlelight. Your palms grow clammy at his viperous swear.Â
âI will not hesitate.âÂ
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uhh yeah brainrot took over and i scribbled like i do not careâŠâŠ MILF!ELLIE ORGASM âŠâŠâŠ.
this shit like 400 words who cares itâs literally ellie getting her shit beat in by her daughters babysitterâŠ.
âYou like this, huh? Sneakinâ around like a whore?â
Ellie flinches when your aggression hits her cheek in gusts. She never wouldâve expected that a nasty phone call with her psycho ex-fiancĂ© wouldâve ended with two â three, fuck three â of her babysitterâs fingers shoved inside her pussy. The nightâs been such a blur: screaming contests, threats of lawsuits, hours of crying from a baby that she loves and would happily die for⊠and now sheâs getting wrung out by someone half her age against the front door that she pays for.
The springtime is prurientâŠ
âI-I love it.â
You grin like a doll. A cursed one with dried blood between every crochet. The white of your teeth get the hairs on her neck reaching for the ceiling. She does love it; loves how you treat her like nothing. Completely stripped of her only identity. A mere vessel for you to use for taunts.
Your thrusts are stealing her soul; fast and hot and determined to get her to break. âAnd I love this pussy. She deserves so much love.â Ellieâs cheeks heat when she catches herself chasing your mouth for a desperate kiss, but you pull away whenever her nose brushes yours. So close, yet not at all. âI bet sheâd hate it if she knew.â
Her chest stings, âDonât talk about her.â
Ellieâs teeth grit at your cackle, âWhat? You donât think sheâd be mad?â
She knows so. Thatâs why she doesnât wanna fucking talk about it. Nothing ruins a nut like thinking about getting cheated on by your first and only love⊠at 7 months pregnant. The mention of her will always leave a fiery sting in her gut.
âWho could abandon such good pussy?â You coo against her throat. âShe takes everything. Does exactly what sheâs supposed to. Pushed out a whole fuckinâ person and still traps whatever goes in.â
Ellie whines when her pussy squeezes down on you in confirmation. Every punctured grind of your fingers is calculated and pushes her into oblivion against white painted hardwood. She can hardly hold herself up. A shaky hand lands on the doorway in attempts to steady herself, eyes capturing glimpses of her brain going into overdrive.
âDonât stop, donât sto â fuckyesyesyesbaby â !â
âUh huuuh, thereâs my pretty girl, gimme what I want⊠thatâs it thaâs itââ
Youâre pulled so close when her walls suck you in sporadic pulses, milking your fingers at an alarming rate. Sheâs screeching her little head off into your shoulder, wetness spreading all over your wrinkly digits and down to your palm. Stress leaves her body with every harsh jerk of her clit under your thumb. Youâre guiding her through the pleasure thatâs crackling beneath her bones and she swears sheâs in love.
Time melts. She only gets seconds to recover before her brain turns to mush when you drop to your knees in front of her, head traveling under her oversized shirt in search of roses. When you locate it, you swallow her whole, and she goes cross eyed at the slick that dribbles down your chin.
Sheâd give you as many children as you want if you always treat her this well.
MEEEP
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click! 1 (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you need a roommate, and you love eggplant. [college au]
WORD COUNT: 3.7k
WARNINGS: photographer/roommate!ellie, ocs an artist with a reputation :p, theyâre both rude as shit, crack, all ocs are black coded yeeahhh yeah, awkward meetings, slut-shaming, brief cunninglingus, mention of eviction, smut later yall know tha vibesÂ
two. three. four.
A/N: short part just stay w me lemme cook... excited 2 write this lets get this shit yall
âW-What do you mean youâre moving?âÂ
Your roommate and best friend wrapped her arms around your neck, pulling you close. Tears flooded in your eyes as she whispered the daunting news, your heart cracking in your chest.Â
âIâm moving soon, stink.â Too soon, according to her. Sheâll be gone by next week. Amaya snickered sadly as she cooed in your temple. âIt's for good reason, though.â
Your ears perk, a curious hum vibrating her shoulder.Â
âI got that internshipâ â
All sadness melds into excitement for your favorite person. You leap into her arms with squeals of congratulatory joy, planting smacking kisses all over her squishy cheek.Â
âOh my god! You shouldâve said that first, bitch! What the fuck!â You wipe your tears on her hoodie.Â
Her laughter rattles through your neck, âI just found out after class! I almost got hit by a fucking bus reading the email.âÂ
Amaya sets you down, rambles about her new position as a songwriting intern spilling from her like an overfilled glass. Tears of joy flow from you and her as she retells every detail about her acceptance. Sheâs leaving in a week and a half and going farther than you thought.Â
âGirl⊠youâre really moving to New York?âÂ
âOnly for like⊠four months, max. But yeah⊠Boutta be on BET come next yearâ â
âMaya.âÂ
âHm?â
â⊠I canât pay rent by myself,â you whisper, cringing and embarrassed.Â
You hate to ruin her moment, but youâre concerned; Living off campus isnât cheap and moving in the middle of the semester is less than ideal. Itâd be a fucking hassle, and â to be frank â youâre not a people person.Â
People like having you around because youâre fun, sure. But your reputation isnât what you hoped for it to be when you moved out of your dadâs place for school. You wanted to be recognized for your creativity, and while your professors never hesitated to praise your talents, your peers failed to see past the status that was placed upon you.Â
Frankly, youâre deemed as a dumb whore, especially after your falling out with one of the campuses best softball pitchers.Â
It wasnât even your fault. One raunchy snap to the wrong person and people think you live for sex and sex only! Just when you think everyone is over slut-shamingâŠÂ
âYou thought I was gonna leave you to fend for yourself? Guess what I did.âÂ
Oh God. âWhat?âÂ
She twiddles her fingers together villainously, âI may or may not have set up an application on the student homepageâ â
The small glimmer of hope washes away, shoulders dropping, fingers coming up to massage your temples. Â
âMayaâŠâ You exhale, trying to keep calm, âYou know those things donât fucking work!âÂ
Roommate compatibility is a fucking scam. No one ever notes how they actually are in the application. You think youâve found someone thatâs clean, quiet, stays out of your space without permission and the next day you find dead roaches under your couch. College attendees have no idea what bleach is and it makes you sick.Â
âDamn⊠youâre usually optimistic.âÂ
âIâm optimistic about good ideas. Iâm gonna be living with a fucking freak from Craigslist, thanks a lot.âÂ
âCâmooon! Youâll be fine, babe, trust me.â Amaya wraps her arms around your neck once more, wetly smacking your cheek before turning to paddle to her room. âPlus, youâll meet someone new!â
When you don't follow, she spins. She mustâve noticed your impassiveness, poutingly asking to help me pack? Tears overwhelm your ducts once more, quietly taking her extended hand as she leads you to her bedroom.Â
DAY ONE of roommate searching began, and you were already prepared to move back in with your dad. Amaya had enough time to orchestrate the housing agreement with you, making sure to highlight some of your most important characteristics in a roommate. One of the main ones being cleanliness. Some form of organization.Â
DAY TWO was easier⊠Someone finally made it to the in-person interview stage. They didnât make it far, though; They wouldnât stop smacking their gum and it drove you crazy. Back to square one.Â
DAY SIX came around and you were losing hope; Why are frat boys applying to live with you? Youâd rather jump into oncoming traffic than house with any of Abbyâs annoying, dirty friends. You've seen their house on numerous occasions and it never fails to make your skin crawl.Â
Itâs DAY THIRTEEN, and Amayaâs gone. After the sobbing fit with your best friend at the airport earlier, you got back to work.Â
DENY REQUEST.Â
âŠ
DENY REQUEST.Â
âŠ
DENY REQUEST.Â
You sigh in exhaustion and lean back in your chair. If you don't take a break from your screen in the next five seconds, your eyes will bleed.Â
Why are people⊠so odd?Â
The number of applications youâve had to deny in the last week is criminal; Why are cis-het men continuously filling out applications knowing theyâre not welcome in your space?!Â
Even the people that made it to the in-person interview stage are incapable of being⊠not strange. Youâd rather die than live with someone who collects dead maggots in mason jars (yes, you did almost call the police when they described their fascination with death in depth)!
All you need is one fruitful application with an identity to match! Just one.Â
Amaya still calls from New York whenever she has a moment of peace to see how the roomie-search is going, but you canât ignore the sadness that fills your heart every time she misses a call. Her laughter is gone, and your day-to-day life feels empty.Â
Theyâre already working your bestie to the bone; You hope she can feel your encouragement from thousands of miles away.Â
You scroll and click, scroll and click, scroll and deny deny deny until you pause, your eyes skimming over the application with a familiar name.Â
ELLIE WILLIAMS.Â
Ellie from stats, you instantly recognize. Curiosity perks and your brows furrow, sipping lukewarm tea as you skim over her contact information, her pet preferences, all the way down to her additional commentary. A snicker left at her blunt statement.Â
temporary request. my last roommate moved and iâm poor. just waiting on this job approval.Â
⊠Ellie in a nutshell. How relatable.
At least sheâs not a complete stranger. Every interaction with her stirs in your mind as you jot her number down on a lone sticky-note. They were nothing special from your perspective: the two of you exchanging notes, her holding the door open as everyone scurried out of class, you asking for a pencil (and her asking for it back after the lecture), and you canât help but wonder why she would want to apply to share a space with anyone, let alone you.Â
She's only ever been described as standoffish by your peers. From the outside, Ellieâs blank. Flat tone, flat expression, plain appearance, and the fact that you never know what sheâs thinking is unsettling. Youâre thrown off your game whenever sheâs near and you hate it.Â
But the spot is temporary; Amaya will be back in a couple of months, and it seems Ellieâs leaving sometime soon by her small note.Â
You down the rest of your tea and stretch where you sit, pondering. Trying to imagine Ellie in your space.
âI donât know why I canât take Mayaâs spot. Iâd make an excellent roommate.âÂ
Your expression flattens, glare piercing through your good friend.Â
Abby scoffs, âCâmooon! I mind my business...â She pauses, leaning across the table, nearly knocking your coffee over. Her whispers send a shock down your spine, ââŠand I give good head. Iâm a package deal.âÂ
A brow raises. Abbyâs sweeter than candy and she puts it down, but you already made the mistake of living with someone you fucked before, and you vowed to never do it again. If Amaya hadnât given you a place to stay after the blow up between you and your ball-throwing sneaky link, youâre not sure where you'd be. Definitely not a student; The stress wouldâve forced you to collapse. And drop out.Â
âSorry, stink. Not happening.âÂ
She rolls her eyes, âWhatever.â She takes a sip from her drink, âCanât believe youâd let that freak in before me.âÂ
You pause. âYouâre a freak, tooâ â
âIâm the good kind!â She searches like someoneâs watching her, voice dropping to a whisper, âEllieâs fucking weird, dude. Whenâs the last time youâve seen her interact with anyone? A literal fucking NPC. All sheâs programmed to do is stand and look.âÂ
âAnd give out pencils,â You interject with a snicker, âWho cares. I donât like most of the idiots here, either. I barely put up with your ass.âÂ
Abby raises her glove-covered palms in surrender, âFuck it. When I see an alert about a missing student, Iâll know who it is.âÂ
âYouâre so fucking extraâ â
DING!
Your neck cranes towards the opening cafe door, shock surging through your body at the sight of the NPC in question. Ellie silently stands at the back of the line, headphones secured on her head and nose red from the cold, classically bored expression plastered on her face.Â
âOh, this is hilarious,â Abby huffs, âGo greet your new housemate.âÂ
Another glare is sent in her direction, âCan you shut up? Her nameâs not on any lease. I barely talked to her.â Â
âDo it now, then. Triple dog dare you.â Abby smirks behind her cup.Â
You sigh and raise from your seat, âYouâre a cunt.âÂ
âThe wettest. Go.âÂ
You flick her forehead before making your way over to Ellie, whoâs mindlessly scrolling through her phone. Her sniffles get louder with each step you take, metal music blasting through her speakers.Â
You tap her shoulder and she jumps, sliding one of her ear cups over to hear.Â
âHey, Ellie,â you smile politely.Â
â⊠Sup,â she mutters hoarsely, turning her body towards you, eyes filled with⊠nothing. Expected.Â
Silence passes, and you fill it, âI got your app yesterday. Just wanted to come and introduce myself.âÂ
âAlright.âÂ
More silence. You can see Abby out the corner of your eye, mockingly swiping her tongue between her index and middle finger. You flush and stutter, and Ellieâs staring like you have two heads.Â
âI, uh⊠yeah. Iâve been having interviews with some people that submitted a form. You free sometime this week?âÂ
âUhhâŠâ She glances down at her phone. âYeah. Around five tomorrow.âÂ
More silence. Fuck, this is awkward.Â
â⊠Cool.â You pull your phone out and text her saved number, the alarm ringing from her phone. âThatâs me. Just call before you stop by.âÂ
She nods and turns her back to you, cranking her music to full volume. You gawkily shuffle where you stand before hustling back to your table, Abby cackling to herself. You plop down and kick her under the table, but she laughs harder.Â
âWhatâd I say!âÂ
âNot a thing,â You hiss, âSheâs just a little awkward. Itâs not that serious.âÂ
âOh, yeah.âÂ
âOh yeah what.âÂ
âSheâs definitely your fucking housemate.â She tsks in disappointment before a smirk appears, her eyes darkening. âCan I eat it one last time before she moves in?âÂ
A jolt surges in your tummy, your hand closing into a fist. You kick her again and she giggles.Â
Time passes as you and Abbyâs conversation carries on like normal. Another ding rings through the coffee shop after some time, and you watch Ellieâs backpack bounce as she rushes down the sidewalk; Abbyâs rambles about a soccer player sheâs trying to smash sound like gibberish.Â
Ellie has a Spider-Man charm and laminated polaroid latched onto her zipper.Â
⊠Cute.Â
Youâre going to fail statistics over a random.
Your professorâs voice sounds like white noise; Every pause she takes is used as an opportunity to sneak glances at Ellie. None of your notes are useful; The doodles and sloppy scribbles are solidifying that incoming F, for sure. Only fifteen minutes until youâre out of here.Â
Sheâs two seats down from you, jotting down whatever she deems necessary for the midterm. You didnât even register her answering the professorâs question, her rosy lips curving around her teeth with each syllable.Â
Ellie blinks slowly, twice, three times before her eyes lock with yours, brows furrowed, evidently confused at your gawking.Â
Your stomach drops with your gaze, fingers curled tightly around your pencil.Â
The lecture finally comes to a close as your thoughts flurry, wordlessly shoving your books into your bag. A light tap on your shoulder yanks your attention.Â
Ellie stands before you, puffer cinched under the bands of her backpack and cheeks just as rosy as before.Â
âHey. Can we switch the time?âÂ
âHuh?â Donât stare, donât stare.Â
She sighs, âThe time for the interview. Can we change it?âÂ
You blink dumbly, âUh⊠sure. To what time?âÂ
Agitation creases her brows. âNow. Something came up and I canât miss it.â She pauses, eyes flicking awkwardly around the room, weakly adding, âIf thatâs okay.âÂ
âUm⊠yeah, no problemâŠâ You peer at the clock on the wall, âYou want a coffee?âÂ
A slight wince from her. â⊠Yup.âÂ
She clearly doesnât by the way her fingers are anxiously tapping on her thigh, but you nod nonetheless, hurriedly grabbing your belongings and leading her down to the student lounge.Â
âI donât want you thinking this interview is one-sided,â You pray your gentle smile is calming the evident nerves of the freckled girl. âYou can ask me anything you want, as well. If you have any concerns, any questions, shoot.âÂ
Ellieâs eyes are glued to her coffee cup, but her head bobs, expression void. Silence simmers between you.Â
âI usually start these off with an icebreaker to get the jitters out! Just list three facts about yourself and Iâll follow.âÂ
Ellieâs lone hand comes up to scratch underneath her ear before meeting your gaze. Her eyes are so pretty; Too bad thereâs nothing behind them.Â
âOr I can go, sure, so!â Your hands clap together, âIâll start with myself. Iâm majoring in graphic design, Iâm secretly a theater nerd, and I dream about owning an eggplant farm.âÂ
The girl before you clearly didn't expect that last statement. Her brows crease and the corner of her lip arches upward in a barely-there smile. Foreign to her face.Â
âThatâs not a fact,â She mutters, the shell in her pupils cracking. Just slightly.Â
âWho cares, I love eggplant. Best vegetable by a landslide.âÂ
âSike.âÂ
You scoff in disbelief, âWhat?âÂ
âEverybody on the planet knows that squash is god-tierâ â
You squint, âSquash? Are you deadass?â
âItâs fucking versatile!â Ellieâs voice pitches higher, and your grin widens, âYou can put it in everything and you donât have to do much. Eggplant sucks up everything in the pan and still comes out soggy and tastelessâ â
Choked laughter leaves your mouth, âIf you donât know how to cook, just say that.âÂ
Her mouth drops in exaggerated shock. âI know how to fuckinâ cook.âÂ
âRight.âÂ
âI do, what the heâ â
âFun fact about Ellie: she canât cook!â You kiddingly sneer. She chuckles and shakes her head, tongue poking the inside of her cheek. You almost miss her statement, âI take pictures.âÂ
âHm?âÂ
âI wanna be a professional photographer... At some point. I take picâ â
Ellieâs phone vibrates on the table and she leaps into action, snatching her bag from beside her and standing from her seat.Â
âWaitâ â
âI gotta go,â She mutters as she straps her bag around her shoulders. âSorry. See you later.âÂ
Ellie throws some bills on the table before dipping, her phone pressed against her ear, rambling about making time. She barely touched her coffee.Â
Couldâve been worse, you utter to yourself.Â
Days pass, and you donât hear from Ellie.Â
When you saw her in stats two days after the interview, she hardly acknowledged you, morphing into the hermit that you knew her to be. You noted how tired she looked, though. You wouldâve asked if she were okay if she hadnât run out of class without a word.Â
Youâre weighing your options: allowing a random oddball into your apartment, or allowing a random oddball who hates eggplant into your apartment. Rent is due next week, and Amayaâs space is still vacant.Â
At this point, the roster is almost nonexistent, and Ellie was the least concerning candidate. Despite Abbyâs concern, she doesnât seem like the type of person to bury dead bodies in the front lawn.Â
âI dunno, friend. Sheâs a little weird. Getting mad incel vibes from her.âÂ
Your eyes roll back into your skull as you munch on cashews, âYouâre getting vibes from someone you never talked to. She seemed cool at the interview.âÂ
âYeah, 'cause vegetable debates are so note-worthy,â Amaya scoffs.Â
Sheâs starting to sound a little too much like Abby, âI think yâall are forgetting that this is a temporary solution. Iâm not tryna spend the rest of my fucking life with her! I need rent paid and she needs a place to stay for a few months.âÂ
Your best friendâs sigh drags through the line, âAlright⊠It seems like you made up your mind.âÂ
âLike I said, rent is due. I donât have many options.âÂ
âStop stressing. You found my replacement, apparently.âÂ
She pauses before hollering, âBITCH, ITâS SATURDAY! WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU INSIDE? WHEREâS ABBY?âÂ
âOut smashing soccer players.â You huff.Â
âDamn⊠My fault.âÂ
âIâm chilling. I just need head.âÂ
âGo out! Find somebody!âÂ
You groan, âThen Iâll have to shaveâ â
âNair exists, you bonehead! Just go! You keep calling in a bad mood and itâs getting on my nerves!âÂ
You ponder and glance at your digital clock. Itâs not even ten⊠Abby did tell you that Kappa was throwing.
âI can hear the engines turning in your big head. Bye.âÂ
Laughter explodes from you at the dial tone.Â
âHey, Siri⊠call Abby.âÂ
âCALLING ABBY BIG DICK SLUTâ â
Tonight has been a blur since you left your apartment.Â
You remember making it halfway through Blam Boom before your speaker died, downing your last couple of shots of 1800, and Ubering to the location Abby pinged.Â
It only took a few minutes for her to scoop you up onto the packed kitchen counter and shove her tongue in your mouth. One shout of Iâm horny from you and she was yours for the rest of the night.Â
Now youâre pressed up against some bathroom sink upstairs, Abbyâs head shaking between your legs, your jeans and underwear flung onto the shower rail. Each flick of her tongue is both clumsy and precise, applying pressure exactly where you need it.Â
Your clitâs throbbing under her tongue, the muscle igniting the flame in your tummy as your climax builds, zaps in your spine. Cries of her name meld with the booming music from outside, the walls rattling like nerves in your toes.Â
Abbyâs gorgeous under you, you know it, the drunk part of your brain knows it, your desperate cunt knows it, but youâre no longer thinking about her compared to earlier. Your mind is elsewhere, somewhere it shouldnât be.Â
Youâre thinking of freckles. Green eyes instead of blue. Chapped, rosy lips, and you donât know why. But you succumb to it. Ellieâs trapped underneath your eyelids, crowding your senses, your empty head suddenly full of images of her in any way you could conjure.Â
Your orgasm shatters you, but youâre silent, trembling hand glued over your mouth as Abby groans in your cunt. Sheâs a doll, easing you back down to earth, dragging your underwear and pants up your shaky legs and getting you back home safely.Â
When youâre showered and your teeth are brushed, she tucks you in, gently kissing your forehead. You beg her to stay with you, but she declines with I know how you get before silently departing.Â
Your phone is squeezed between your fingers after minutes of trying to sleep, eyeing Ellieâs saved contact until darkness overtakes you.Â
The pounding on your door is worse than the ones from inside your skull. Fuck Tequila, from the bottom of your heart. Waves of nausea crash over you with every waddle, hobbling your hunched form over to yank the front door open.Â
A bored Ellie stands in front of you, a large camera and headphones hanging from her neck, seemingly cozy in her sweater and puffer, large duffel bags packed to the brim with clothes dangling from her shoulders. Your cheeks warm instantly. Gray sweats, gray sweatsâ
âIâm here,â She states plainly.Â
â⊠Why?â You croak.
Ellieâs seems just as confused as you, her eyes piercing as if her appearance is obvious.Â
âTo move in.âÂ
â⊠Why?â
Ellie sighs and snags her phone from her jacket pocket, swiping a few times before nearly blinding you with her screen.Â
Your jaw nearly hits the floor. When the fuck did you send that?Â
âSo, Iâm here,â she slips her device back in her pocket. âWhich room am I in?âÂ
âE-Ellie, uh⊠there's been a misâ â
âLook,â she holds her pale, veiny hands up. âI donât wanna beat around the bush anymore. I got evicted and I need a place to stay until I secure this job. Iâm willing to put down whateverâs needed for rent but I donât have time to bullshit.âÂ
Ellie proceeds, sarcasm slipping, âRespectfully.âÂ
She pushes past your stunned form, bags accidentally brushing against your bare legs. You can't even move to stop her; You merely watch Ellie shuffle to inspect the living room, the small kitchen, pausing in front of the abstract painting you made for your dad before eventually moving down the hall and into Amayaâs empty space. How the fuck did she get in the building, anyway?
Your deer-like eyes lock with her void, mossy ones as she peers over her shoulder.Â
âI still have some stuff to pick up. Please leave my key under the mat if you go somewhere.âÂ
Before she enters the empty room next to yours, you hear her gruffly say, âLeave the lease on the table so I can sign it, too.â
Amayaâs â Ellieâs door slams shut seconds later, the soft click of the door locking follows suit.Â
âŠ
What the fuck just happened. Gall almost surpasses your anger. The audacity...
For the first time, youâre grateful that your shift is in two hours. You need to get the fuck out of here before you cause a scene and catch a case.Â
tagggiiiesss missed yall ;3 : @starologist @hrtmal @ohlawdthebirds @villainousbear @timmy-27 @inf3ct3dd @aouiaa @shurisbigtoe @emothurman @lonelyfooryouonly @imelliesgf @baumbii @brackishkittie @littletinyladybugs @r1miese @horror-whoree @elsbunny222 @elliesatchel @makemescreamel @lav3nd3rhaze @elliezflower @ellieloml @ellies-princess @saverdelrey @womenofarcane
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where we meet. (e.w.)
when ur a monsterfucker n its kinktober lol am i right guys
*silence*
âŠ..
thank u 4 the pointers baby :3 ilysm @elliesbelle
wc;cw: 17.8k, baker!oc, demon!ellie, HEAVY ANGST [mentions underage drinking + alcoholism + drunk driving + car accidents + death], ocâs an eldest daughter⊠yeah, HORROR? [gore + animal death/mutilation? + vomit + idk scary shit like blood n stuff], SMUT!!!!![HEAVY DUBCON + sexual tension + ellie shape shifts LOL + her tongue is barbed and forked and long like a fruit rollup + blood drinking + fucking outside HAHA + splash of sadism + edging + tentacles WOOO THIS BITCH IS SHAKING THE TABLE!!! + pain kink + spit but venomous + lots of cum/squirting + anal/d!p + err restraint? + oral + crazy size kink + dirty talk + masturbation? + dumbification/mind break + dacryphilia + burning/marking
âAlright, my love! A dozen red velvet cupcakes, four slices of carrot cake, and ten brownies!âÂ
You handed two large brown bags filled with desserts over to your favorite regular, Roxanna, âI threw in two complementary cannolis, donât tell Hattie, please!â You whispered.Â
The older woman laughed, turning to depart with the sweet treats, âShe ainât getting a word outta me. Thank you, baby. See you soon.âÂ
âHave an amazing birthday! Try not to get too rowdy on that yacht, now!â
âGirl, Iâm grown! If one of my guests show up without a bottle, they ainât gettinâ on, point blank!â You both giggled.Â
She blew you a kiss and scurried off, the small bell above the door ringing at her exit. You sighed and scurried to the back and into the kitchen, untying your apron and hanging it on the coat rack.Â
âNow, Miss Hattieâ â
âI know you ainât tryna disrupt my craft right now. You know better!â The elderly woman had her gray hairs pinned back under her hair net, practically squatting near the counter as she perfected the icing job on the three-layered wedding cake, shrouded in gold and sparkly silver. Your heart grew fonder at the slight tremble in her hands as she piped sprouts of buttercream around the cake topper.Â
Hattie, despite her stubbornness, was reason your⊠fresh start went so smoothly. Meeting her was a blessing in disguise; It was raining when you stumbled upon the old bakery she worked at years ago. Youâd just moved as far as you could from your hometown, in desperate need of a job. She turned down your desperate pleads time and time again, that is until you showed up to the shop one last time, drenched in rain, with your homemade red velvet cake.Â
Sheâd nearly cracked you with a broom herself when she saw you standing by the service stand, but you pleaded one last time, and left the foil wrapped dish on the register counter without another word. Youâd piqued her interest. Just a smidge.Â
Youâd received a call from a random number â the owner of the shopâ days later, offering you a position at the local bakery.Â
As a dishwasher.Â
Your victory didnât last long, however. Turns out your boss was a thieving bastard, cutting all the employee's earnings by a third months after you were hired. You were shocked no one shoved a piping bag up his ass.Â
Weeks later, you were out of a job. And so was Hattie.Â
⊠Did she reluctantly ask you for tips on how you made your cake that moist as you two waited for the bus, hairnets still on? Absolutely. And you shared them on the ride back to her small home.
She swiftly became your support, your right-hand man, your newfound comfort only after a few months. You silently thank the universe for her everyday; You couldnât imagine opening your spot without her with you, making sure to double â triple whatever shit pay her previous boss gave her.Â
âCâmon, Roxie just picked up. We needa head out now,â Closing was always a hassle whenever Hattie was in the zone. The extra five minutes she often requested easily turned into an hour if not regulated; Bless her heart.Â
She sighed and stretched, âAlright,â Reluctance in her tone. âYouâre lucky my grandkids are coming to see me tomorrow!â She set her piping bag down and allowed you to stroll the wedding cake into the walk-in fridge.Â
Hattie hardly ever asked for time off; You practically have to shove her out your bakery doors every Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, New Years! The only request â demand sheâs ever made was no work on Halloween. She gave you explicit instructions when you hired her years ago: donât call my phone during the day of evil!Â
Her request threw you for a whirl at first. You assumed she was joking because what seventy-year-old woman still cares about Halloween and its lore? When she hadnât laughed with you, however, you apologized and offered her three days off for the end of October. Everyone deserves to be with their family, regardless of time of year.
You wished you had someone to call during the cozy Fall.Â
You threw yourself into work the second you got the chance. Opening your bakery a year ago was something youâd been working towards since you made your first batch of cupcakes at ten years old. You and your mother baked until your arms burned from kneading years after that, and the hobby swiftly became your down time. Your shop was small and crowded, but your name was printed on the door.Â
You never thought youâd be able to own anything after the last decade of being locked up, after the accident youâd caused.Â
That horrid day and its repercussions continues to loom over you like a dark cloud no matter where you go, filling your life with trails of dread that refuse to be washed away. You lost your family, some friends, a potential partner, and it was all because of one mindless decision during your reckless and dark teenage years.Â
To put it bluntly, you never recovered. Everyday is a struggle, but youâve managed to distract yourself with work. Your newfound friends hate that they never see you, but you beg them to accept that you're busy whenever you receive an invitation to dinner.Â
Sadly, your accomplishments are not companions, and your heart is forever vacant. Nothing â or no one â will change that.Â
No matter how many times youâve tried to reach out to your loved ones, your calls go unanswered. You came to terms with the fact that theyâll always see you as the force that destroyed their unity â the disappointment, ages ago, but your heart still longs for their affection.Â
You wake up and hope for their forgiveness everyday.Â
âYou cominâ?â
Miss Hattieâs voice pulled you from your thoughts as you silently walked her to the door, her work bag in hand and ready to go.Â
âNo, maâam. Still gotta check the inventory.âÂ
She sucked her teeth, âI coulda still been decoratingâ â
âEnough of that! Get on home!â You waved her off with a smile.Â
âUh huh,â She rolled her eyes and left with a nod, âSee you next week!âÂ
You waved goodbye, shutting the door fully and flipping the open sign to close.Â
You stretched your arms above your head, your achy shoulders and neck popping with stiffness. All you wanted was a fucking massage.Â
You made your way back to the kitchen, clipboard in hand, marking off products that desperately needed refilling. What kind of bakery runs out of sugar? Sugar!
The bus ride home was nauseating; You need your own car desperately.Â
You politely greeted your neighbors as they left the elevator before heading to your floor. The late afternoon sun was blooming through the hallway windows of your building. You unlocked your door, the waft of cool air from the open window in your living room brushing your skin.Â
You tossed your bag off your shoulders, and it thudded to the floor, the overworked bones in your arms cracking when you stretched them up at the ceiling.Â
The small ball of fur rubbing against your leg rejuvenated you in seconds.Â
Your cat meowed happily when you bent down to plant kisses on her head. She followed you into the kitchen as you heated the kettle on the stove, hopping onto the counter to watch you work.Â
âYou know better. Get down,â your eyes squinted.Â
She only tilted her head at you before sitting on the granite completely. You were too tired to move her.Â
Whistles erupted from the small hole in the pot minutes later. You filled your mug to the brim with the soothing herbal tea your friends gave you before heading into your bedroom.Â
You closed your blinds and undressed completely, plopping onto your blankets, taking sips from your mug as exhaustion and warmth flooded your body.Â
The last thing you remember was your cat walking all over your back.Â
THUD, THUD THUD THUDTHUDâ
Your body shook awake at the pounding coming from the entrance of your home. Anxiety surged in your gut when the loud knocks against wood came to a sudden halt, only to start up again, even more frantic and aggressive.Â
THUDTHUDTHUDTHUDâ
You kicked your blankets off and sat up, your sweaty form clinging to the sheets as you searched around your room. Everything was where it was supposed to be, but your door was wide open. You never leave your door open. Did you shut your door when you came home fromâŠÂ
Where were you before this?Â
You called for your cat once, twice, three times, but she never came. Your apartment was always quiet, but this silence⊠It was weighted, a heavy press on your chest.Â
You donât remember how you got into your living room, but your toes were digging into the soft fluff of your rugs, attempting to sketch into the floor. Even the slightest movement felt like a fight against sludge. Like trekking through the rain in drenched clothes. The knocks didnât cease, and was synced with the pounding in your ears.Â
The walls were breathing. Why couldnât you breathe? You swore you were going to throw up.Â
The painted plaster moved in waves, your door plunging in and out of its frame, back and forth like a pendulum, but you couldnât see behind it; Your toenails scratched harder into the floor. You couldnât stop staring at the door. Every nerve in your brain was urging you to run, find a place to hide, but your body wouldnât allow it. You simply stood, trapped in a cloud of distress.Â
The banging stopped and you inhaled, air finally filling your lungs. The feel of fabric beneath your toes was no longer there: something softer than hardwood. Something squishy, something sticky and wet with hair. Your nails tore into it, oddly comforted by the sensation.Â
All was quiet again, the familiar steadiness of your home calming your racing heart.Â
Until a weak, wheezing exhale came from beneath you; You nearly missed it. Your heart rate skyrocketed when you peered at your feet.Â
Your catâs neck and stomach were sliced open, her small organs pouring out of the large slit in her body. Maggots and spiders were crawling all over her, your feet completely drenched in her blood and your nails plunged deep into her decomposing skin. The insects devouring your nearly dead pet rushed up your legs at an alarming rate, tearing into your thighs like desperate rats fiending for a meal.Â
You woke up screaming.Â
âGirlâŠâ
âI donât know why that happened! Iâve never had a dream like that before!â All the lights were on in your home, your kitty purring in your lap as you stroked her comfortingly. âI know itâs late but can you come over? Iâm honestly⊠freaked out right now.âÂ
Your good friend, Celeste, exhaled over the line, â⊠Yeah,â she resigned. âGimmie ten minutes. I love you. Just⊠try to relax.âÂ
You breathed when she told you to, your head bobbing like she could see you, âOkay. I love you too.âÂ
You almost didnât want to hang up, but youâd already bothered your friend enough tonight. Itâs been a while since you two hung out together; You hope sheâs up for a sleepover!Â
Your kitty nuzzled your chin affectionately. You hoped she knew you would never hurt her.Â
âIâve never been so horrified in my life!â You spoke around the sugary spoon in your mouth. âDreams have never⊠felt like that for me. I swear, it doesnât matter how deep my sleep paralysis is! I felt like I was really,â you quickly peered around the room for your kitty, praying she couldnât hear you. âStepping on her body! My poor angel.âÂ
Celeste shoveled more ice cream into her mouth, âGirl, thatâs fucking crazy,â she assured, nodding towards your sleeping baby on the table. âJust remember that nothing actually happened. You love her and she loves you.âÂ
She continued after a heavy sigh. âBut you know me. Dreams, nightmares, theyâre all from something, and if it felt as real as you sayâŠâ Her brow arched at you. What the fuck is she talking about?Â
Her eyes rolled in exasperation, âIsnât your coworker, like⊠mad superstitious? Queen, but still. The devilâs working, girl.âÂ
You took a deep breath like she instructed a billion times over since sheâs arrived. A smirk grew on her face.Â
âPlus⊠itâs that time of year. ,â she stuck her tongue out and playfully grabbed her tits, âWe gettinâ slutty. Gotta show out for Scorpio season. I made my own costume.âÂ
Your nerves calmed at the reminder of your friends' packed weekend. Since your only true time off was during the spooky season, they always encouraged you to join them in their reckless behavior, especially during your time off. You resigned from partying a long time ago, but did indulge in the lively atmosphere from time to time during the holiday season.Â
âYouâre right,â you sighed and placed your hands over the resting ones on her chest.Â
âThank you! Take that damn chef hat off!â she scolded. âNo more business talk untilâ â
âNext week, I know,â you mocked, âAnd I donât wear chef hats, thanks.âÂ
âDonât give a shit about any of that. Iâm getting pipe tomorrow night,â Celeste fell back on the sofa, giddily kicking her feet in the air.
A hearty chuckle escaped you. Maybe youâd meet someone too.Â
You were finally able to get some restâ thank god for Celeste â and start organizing your costumes for the⊠large sum of parties they planned to drag you to.Â
You still havenât completely recovered from your nightmare two nights ago. The vivid imagery that your subconscious conjured up still gives you the ick, but for the sake of your friends, you chose not to bring it up again. You silently thanked the universe when you managed to get a full nine hours the night before.Â
Your friends managed to pull you into the Halloween spirit and take you to⊠Spirit. Despite the void stares from your friends at your costume choices, you settled on the Zelda outfit thatâd been on sale at Party City for the past two weeks. Celeste couldnât stop herself from⊠cutting your costume up and making it as revealing as possible. She opted to cut off the sleeves, sew the pants into a skirt that hugged your body way too tightly, and did your makeup how she wanted. You didnât stand a chance against her.Â
You despised how hot clubs get; You probably looked like you were melting.Â
You stayed as far away from the bar as you could, watching your friends down shot after shot as the night progressed. Your surroundings were crowded and stuffy, the bass of the DJ booth rattling from your feet all the way up to your chest. Your moves were sloppy and disoriented, but Celeste was behind you, grabbing your hips and supporting your weight.Â
Your thoughts were hazy and incoherent as your arms waved around to the beat. The music blasting in your ears turned into white noise; The environment completely entranced you, your eyes shutting at the weightlessness of your clammy body.Â
The hands behind you were suddenly grabbing tighter, yanking you closer, as you continued to dance.Â
You pushed back onto them and their arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you back, yanking you close, your clammy flesh practically melding with theirs. Their scent engulfed you, rich and deep yet distinct. Your arm wrapped around the back of their neck, pulling them down while their hands explored your hips.Â
Their lips were on your neck, your head resting on their shoulder. Something hot was stirring in the pit of your stomach the more they swayed you, the arch in your back deepening; You havenât felt wanted in so long.Â
You tried to spin to face them, but they held you still, pressing their chest into your backside. Your breaths picked up when they bit the most sensitive spot on your neck, your toes curling in your heeled boots, your manicured nails nearly chipping in your stockings.Â
Their mouth moved higher and higher, right under your ear, the hand coming up to wrap around your throat to hold you still. Your core squeezed as the grip on your neck tightened⊠and tightened⊠your airways were closing, and swiftly, the feeling was no longer pleasant. Your eyes snapped open when they didnât let up, a shocked gasp escaping your dry mouth. The moment was no longer sensual, but straining and forceful. Almost angry.Â
Your lust turned to panic instantly, your eyes bulging as your nails dug into their hands, their taut thighs, their wrist, but they didnât budge. You thrashed and shook with terror. You gasped for air and tried to push them off but it was all for naught.Â
Nobody came to help you. Suddenly all the faceless bodies around you were gone, heaps of black smoke pooling at your feet as you wailed for Celeste. The hands and lips were replaced with razor sharp claws and fangs as cold as ice against the side of your face, murmuring voices and screaming chants roaring in your ears. The former body grew monstrous, tripling in size and darkening.Â
The sensation of decaying, bloody skin was at your feet once more, fiery red ants and black widows nipping at your skin as the smoke flooded up your body, swallowing your calves, thighs, waist.Â
Weak shouts and begs for release went unheard by the force behind you. A faint whisper of your name made you sob harder; Youâre going to die, youâre going to die, youâre going to dieâ
The whisper called your name again. And again. And again, much louder and urgent. Desperate for a response but all you could do was holler for your mother.Â
One last shout of your name made you drop to the floor, all the sensations surrounding your body gone. Your crown clanked onto the vibrating hardwood as drunk clubgoers gawked at you in confusion and annoyance, Celeste and your friends staring in concern, reaching to help you up.Â
But you couldnât be touched. Any brush on your skin surged your heart to your throat. You needed to get the fuck out of here.Â
Your friends kept yelling about what happened, how they could help, but you couldnât speak. You swore you were going to vomit.Â
You pushed yourself off the hardwood and through the crowd, away from your friends, away from everyone. Your smudged makeup stained your wrists, the shouts of your name going unheard as you shoved passed security and ran into the night.Â
You didnât sleep at all that night.Â
You immediately left the club, hauled a taxi, and ran up into your apartment, double â triple checking to make sure all your doors were locked and windows were closed. You tore your costume off your body and threw it into your garbage before hopping into the shower. You desperately wanted to wash your hair, but you refused to close your eyes. The darkness when you blinked was haunting enough.Â
To put it lightly, you were fucking horrified.Â
Your body trembled under the steaming water, soft sobs escaping while you scrubbed your skin raw. Especially your shoulder.Â
Your phone rang off the hook until the sun rose, your kitty refusing to leave your lap. She never failed to comfort you in your times of need, but you barely rubbed her all night. All you could do is cry and think.Â
Your friends pounded on your door multiple times, but you refused to move from your bed. Their frantic knocking was very reminiscent of the pounding in your nightmare. You couldnât shake how real everything felt: the comfort, the desire, the destress, the pure, unfiltered terror at the imagery of you being eaten alive by darkness. If you could even call it that: imagery.Â
Imagery is not enough to describe what you experienced. You were attacked in public, and no one bothered to help you. Nobody⊠saw anything.Â
Youâre not fucking crazy.Â
Your friends were sweet enough to stop by the same afternoon with candles and lavender-scented bath bombs after your public breakdown. Their efforts at lifting your spirits didnât go unnoticed, but your thoughts kept racing, every time you shut your eyes, even for a few seconds. How the hell were you going to explain what you saw that night?Â
Despite your friendsâ skepticism, you were eventually able to convince them that you felt severely claustrophobic and the lack of air sent you spiraling.Â
⊠It wasnât a complete lie, at least.Â
You were able to get some minuscule hours of sleep after they left before it was time to prepare for your shift. Dark circles were imprinted under your eyes, your skin was dry, and your uniform was not ironed, but you were up and moving. Small victories.Â
Your hand was practically glued to your forehead in extreme fatigue, your eyes burning at the brightness of your computer screen as you checked the time. Your emails always boomed during this time of year as people prepared for the holiday season; A good night's sleep seemed even farther away now.Â
You swiftly replied to each request with your availability before grabbing your bag and keys, kissing your kitty goodbye, and running down to the bus stop.Â
You greeted every familiar face with a polite smile before entering the already packed vehicle, the beginnings of a rising sun beaming through the scratched windows. You plopped onto the only available seat â farthest away from your neighbors â with a heavy exhale, your head falling against its rest.Â
This week is going to be so gruesome for orders; You prayed Ms. Hattie was prepared for it.Â
Returning to work was just as draining as youâd assumed.Â
Your business line has been ringing off the hook all morning, people asking for dozens of gingerbread cookies and wedding cakes layered to the ceiling. You could make a nest for yourself right on the clean tiles of the kitchen and nap.Â
Youâll never know how Ms. Hattie did it: wakes up at five in the morning and moves through decorating like a walk in the park. You can barely lift your arms and itâs only hour three.Â
You whipped egg whites and sugar like your life depended on it â it did â with your landline tucked between your shoulder and ear, reciting pick-up addresses and numbers in voicemails. Youâre so fucking tired.Â
Hattie wasnât, though. Just quiet. A bit too quiet.Â
She hasnât said much since youâve arrived. She got to the shop much earlier than expected, politely saying good morning when she caught you standing by the kitchen entrance. She hasnât acknowledged you since. You tried to get some laughs out of her, but she only half-smiled before silently returning to her work.
You two continued to carefully wrap and deliver dessert-filled boxes like a well fueled machine up until the last minutes before closing. You stretched before grabbing the broom to sweep the entire shop, making your way into the kitchen where Hattie was staring off into nothing.Â
âHey, girl. I can close up, so,â you murmured, wiping the sweat off your brow.Â
She seemed to be pulled out of her trance, âOh, sorry hun,â Her head bobbed. âAre you sure youâre good on your own?âÂ
âYes, maâam,â You paused. âUmm, are you doinâ okay? You seemed⊠I dunno, quiet, I guess.âÂ
Hattie nodded, and you took it as an invitation to speak. âSomethinâ you wanna talk about? You didnât even tell me how your weekend went. Howâre the kiddos?â You asked gently, propping your broom against the wall.Â
A heavy exhale left her.Â
âI⊠Something wasâŠâ she stuttered.Â
Another deep inhale. Another lengthy exhale.Â
âSomething felt different, no?â She whispered.Â
Your brows pulled down in confusion. âWhat dâyou mean?âÂ
âThis⊠this weekend. Wasnât it different?âÂ
âUmmâŠâ you pondered. âNot really, no. Why, whatâs goinâ on?âÂ
More silence before she huffed, â⊠Nothinâ. You know how I get this time of year. Sorry, dear.â She turned and snatched her work bag off the counter before departing with a skittish nod, âSee ya tomorrow.âÂ
âW-Waitââ You tried to stop her, but the kitchen door was already slamming shut, the small ding alarming Hattieâs departure from your shop.Â
You allowed your tense shoulders to drop, snagging the broom and heading towards the front of your shop for cleanup.Â
That was odd.Â
The front door of your apartment shut and you fell back against it in exhaustion. You desperately needed a massage.Â
You stretched before pushing yourself off the door and wobbling over to your catâs area, refilling her bowl and cleaning her litter box. You clicked your tongue to lure her over to eat.Â
You called her name out when she didnât come. You snagged her filled bowl and shook it, alerting your baby to come and eat. She still didnât come. You huffed and made your way into your room; She probably took over your softest pillow again.
The bowl in your hand clattered to the floor and your screams nearly shattered your windows. Bile rose in your throat and you heaved at the scene in front of you.Â
Your beloved pet was dead. Completely mauled, her blood and organs pouring out of the giant slit that went from her throat to her stomach. Sobs wracked through you at the savage attack. The one source of comfort that you looked forward to seeing every morning and night was gone, snatched away from you in the blink of an eye. You've tried to alleviate your anxiety by suggesting that your nightmares are merely that. Dreams. Creations by your subconscious to try and solve issues that occur in your everyday life.Â
But nothing so heinous would ever cross your mind. You would never harm the precious angel who brought you healing in your times of need. Â
This wasnât a coincidence. Someone came into your home while you were away. Someone killed your baby.Â
âWeâre sorry, maâam,â the county deputy sighed, âBut there wasnât any sign of breaking and entering. You stated that everything is where you left it, correct?âÂ
âEverything wasnât where I left it,â Anger rushed through you at the officerâs dismissiveness. âMy cat was fucking fine before I went to work. Iâd never⊠put her in an environment where she could be harmed,â Tears flooded your eyes.Â
âWe understand that this was an attack done in your home. What happened hereâs definitely not normal, but we wonât be able to solve everything in one night,â He consoled, âWeâre getting a team here to investigate. I would suggest packing an overnight bag and staying with family or a friend until we get this situated.âÂ
Family. You almost broke down.Â
When you didnât respond, he interjected, âWe can also find you a room to stay in for a few nightsâ â
âNo, uh, thanks. I got it.âÂ
You dug in your pocket for your phone and dialed Celeste. He nodded and spun towards his partner who jabbered into a walkie.Â
Your friendâs tone blared through the speakers, âHiii, baby, whatâs up! I havenât heard from you in a minute.âÂ
Your bottom lip wobbled, âSorry I didnât call. Um⊠can I ask a favor?âÂ
âOf course you can. Whatâs the matter? Are you good?âÂ
The floodgates thatâd been building in your eyes overflowed, pouring down your cheeks and onto your work shirt. You wept.Â
âCan you come pick me up?âÂ
âI just feel like⊠I feel like Iâm going fucking crazy,â you whispered and picked at your fingers, âI know it doesnât make any sense, butâ â
âNah, it makes perfect sense. Youâre fucking psychic. Thatâs literally the only explanation,â your friend shook her head at you. âYou dreamt about something and it happened a couple days after.âÂ
âNone of that shit is real, Celeste.â She sighed in disappointment.Â
âItâs not real to you,â she pointed from the other side of the couch. âMy grandmomma was a witchââYou huffed and adjusted the blanket draped over your shoulders.Â
âBut, hey,â she raised her hands in defense. âI canât make you believe anything. But coming from the most superstitious bitch in town, somebody is trying to tell you something. Youâre not freaked out?âÂ
âOf course Iâm freaked out! But I'm not wasting my time thinking about some⊠fuckinâ ghostâ â
âWhat happened when we were at the club?âÂ
Your blood went ice cold. You couldnât stop the pure terror that spread across your face at the mention of that night. Youâve attempted to block⊠whatever happened out of your memory for the last couple days for your sake, but Celeste read you like a book, and you hated her for it.Â
âExactly. Are you ready to talk about it now?âÂ
âI⊠I told you what happenedâ â
âYou lied about what happened. And donât try to argue,â She leaned closer, eyes comforting. âWe tried calling out to you for so long. We thought somebody fucking⊠laced you, or something, you were so zoned out. We were this close to calling the fucking police.âÂ
â⊠What do you mean? I lost y'all in the crowd before I started dancing with somebodyâ â
Celeste shook her head, âNo.âÂ
Your throat went dry, the blood rushing to your head almost making you faint.Â
âWe tried to tell you, baby. But we didnât wanna push you to talk to us about it,â she said gently. âWe were with you the entire time.âÂ
The tightness in your chest wouldnât subside, shuddering breaths leaving your nose with every denial from Celeste. Â
âNo one else came up to us,â she whispered, âand no one danced with you.âÂ
Your head kept shaking in attempts to disprove her claims, in attempts to combat the fear that was attempting to slice you from the inside out, but deep down, you knew she was onto something.Â
Celesteâs hold sadly didnât bring comfort, but she held you close anyway, ensuring that youâre not by yourself, but all you could think about was your mother. The smile she used to give you whenever you succeeded never failed to recharge the dying battery in your back. Itâs depressing how little impact her grin has on you in adulthood.Â
The dark cloud of your past cascaded over the two of you; If she were here, your best friend wouldâve forced you into the passenger side of her fatherâs pick-up, already halfway across town by now, set to isolate. To escape.Â
âWhoever did this is incredibly strategic,â The tall detective stated with a journal in his hand, âThey didnât leave traces of anything: hair, fingerprints, nothing. Itâs almost like they never broke in.âÂ
You havenât been able to get any sleep or go to work for the last week, completely isolated inside your friendâs home. When you received a phone call from the detective assigned to your case, you caught the first bus you could and flew back to your apartment complex. You donât remember the ride.Â
Your hope plummeted at his declaration, even with his reassurance, âWeâre doing everything we can to find this person. Your safety is our number one priority.â
He gave your shoulder an encouraging squeeze, and it brought you comfort. While you werenât satisfied with their reports, you could see that he was trying. Was this your first time meeting him?Â
He seemed familiar, but you couldnât place it.Â
He stared into your eyes with a gentle grin and continued, âIf we should even call them that. Theyâre a cold-blooded, heartless fiend that needs to be taken out.âÂ
Your brows furrowed at his sudden determination, but your head bobbed in agreement. Your mind was racing but you couldnât say anything. Someone killed your baby. Did his grip on you tighten? You couldnât move.Â
âThe bastards that get away with such vicious crimes need to be put away forever,â his tone was harsh and sharp, and it made your fingers twitch. Your stomach plummeted when his smile stretched higher, his teeth shin
His other hand landed on your other shoulder. You tried to move back, but you couldnât, âS-Sirâ â
âThey need to be hung from the ceiling by their throats and slaughtered like fucking pigs! Like the worthless animals they are! ââ
His spit landed on your face at his screams. He hollered about how much he hated killers, how they were scum and deserved to be tortured. How youâŠÂ
âYou thought we forgot about what you did?â He whimpered; prior menacing smile vanished.
The bearded man in front of you was sobbing, his gaze pinning you against the wall. He didnât blink and his eyes were bloodshot, his mouth turned downward, the corners of his lips nearly touching his chin. Your eyes frantically traveled over his form, his uniform replaced with pajamas and slippers.Â
âYOUâRE A KILLER! YOUâRE A KILLER, YOUâRE A KILLER, YOUâRE A KILLER! ââ
Cursed murmurs amplified his pained shouts. Your home was melting away, the walls seeping into the floor before you dropped, the terror weakening your limbs. Your nails dug into the grass and dirt below you, panic electrifying your system.Â
The man was gone, but you were outside in the middle of the night, decomposing trees surrounding you. You tried to stand but you couldnât. You were forced to take in the scene that you wished to never see again. The one scene that your subconscious couldnât eliminate no matter how hard you tried to forget.Â
Your parents' carâ wrecked car. The vehicle was completely destroyed, the bumper and windscreen ran into a tree. You screamed and shouted but no noise left, the sinister chants resounding in your ears. The wreckage seemed to move, closer, closer, your eyes locking onto the two bodies inside completely mangled in the accident.Â
The two bodies were younger you, thrown over the dashboard and your arm twisted to an alarming degree, blood running down your head and mouth, shards of glass piercing through the skin of your bare legs.Â
You couldnât stop yourself from peering at the body beside you. You hollered for help, cried and begged to wake up, all while staring at your best friend â your soulmate, completely maimed from the waist up. It was just as brutal as you remember: her blood splattered all over the airbag, her limbs shattered and broken, large pieces of glass pierced into her skull. You were sick, you were sick.Â
Suddenly, the mantras that attempted to swallow you whole stopped.Â
Then there was laughter. Your soulmateâs laughter, but it wasnât how you remembered. It was darker, hollow, empty. Enraged.Â
Everything around you went dark.Â
Sobs tear through your throat the second your eyes open, the comforting scent of Celesteâs lavender candles intruding your senses. Your body was drenched in sweat, and you could hear your friend calling out to you, her cold hands on your face, but you couldnât think. You just screamed. Her attempts of trying to sit you up failed, your fingers hanging onto her sheets for dear life. You were paralyzed with fear.Â
Somehow, your biggest regret came to pay you a visit.Â
Your instincts finally kick in, pushing Celeste off you and bolting towards her bedroom door. She was calling for you; she even reached out to touch you, but you pushed her harder.Â
She screamed for you to stop, and you lost it.Â
âGet the fuck away from me! STOP â stop fucking touching me!â you rush out into her living room and towards her front door.Â
Shocked plastered across your friendâs face.Â
Celeste whispered your name; Why did she sound like her?
âI gotta get the fuck outta here, I canât,â heave, âI canât fucking do this, I canât, I canât â â
Distraught mumbles fled your tongue on your way out, not bothering to look back at your friend. You heard her sniffling before the door slammed shut, guilt swarming your chest, but it wasnât enough to overcast the terror ripping you open from the inside out.Â
After vomiting outside of Celesteâs apartment building, â multiple times â you took your leave. As fast as you could. You couldn't say a word to her; She desperately tried to get information out of you, but your throat felt like it would crack open at the slightest whisper. The fear youâd been trying to invalidate crashed into you all at once.Â
You fled without your belongings, only slowing when night goers surrounded you in the city.Â
Celeste has been worried sick about you this entire time, but you didnât care. You couldnât care.Â
Your steps were jerky and quick, and you kept scratching at your shoulder. You felt her everywhere. All over you, but it wasnât comforting. Not like it used to be.Â
You walked and walked, your mind racing with moments from your past: the last moments with your best friend. Your kryptonite. The scar in your shoulder was covered in fresh, red lines from your nails.Â
JUNIOR YEAR: 2012
You frantically shoved your books into your locker, anticipating the alarm that sounded for lunch. You canât wait to get the hell out of here.Â
The second it goes off, you're booking it for the door. You hoped Ellie kept her word and brought your birthday present.Â
You busied yourself in your small cubby whenever security or teachers walked by, politely greeting them with the most innocent smile you could muster. They didnât bat an eye, wishing you a happy birthday before turning the corner at the end of the hall.Â
You gave them all fake greetings until the loud tone blared through the hallway speakers, students instantly rushing out of their classrooms to head to the cafeteria. You grabbed your now empty backpack and merged with the crowd, trekking for the exit. You managed to scurry through the double doors of the school and bolted towards your parentsâ old car, ducking behind the driver's side as you waited for your best friend.Â
You texted her a few times but she didnât respond for minutes. You almost gave up and returned inside the building before two hands pinched your sides from behind. A squeal left your mouth when you whipped around. Ellie snorted at you, her arms wrapping around your neck in a tight hug. You reluctantly hugged her back.Â
HAAAPPY BIIIRTHDAAAY TOOO YOUUUâ
You shushed her shouts with a smile, Shut up! Someone might hear you.
She kissed your cheek before releasing you, No ones fucking here, relax. Open the door, her head jerked towards the vehicle.
You stealthily unlocked it and the two of you jumped in. You shoved the key into the ignition as Ellie cranked the speakers all the way up, your car rattling with bass as you two exited the parking lot and zoomed down the main street.Â
Ellie belted Cherry Waves out the window, bright laughs leaving your throats as you drove to⊠anywhere. Times like this always bring you joy; You love being around her.Â
Ditching class mightâve not been the best birthday celebration, but you were having a ball.Â
You drove until you reached the end of town. There was a small campground that you and Ellie found on your first couple drives together, and it swiftly became your little get away spot. Youâd spend hours talking, drawing, screaming at the top of your lungs until the sun disappeared and your parents demanded you come home.Â
You two raced to your designated spot by the lake, Ellieâs filled backpack slamming onto the sand, glass clattering from the inside. You mischievously eyed it, I think someone owes me a present!Â
I donât owe you shit. Iâm a good friend, say thank you, She rolled her eyes. You grabbed her hands and clumsily twirled her.Â
Thank you, Ellieee! you nearly ripped her bag apart as you inspected the contents.Â
Donât go too crazy. Remember what happened last time? her smile was light, but you could tell she was scolding you. You snickered.Â
Um, yeah. We had a ball. Help me open this, you downplayed, passing her the unopened bottle.Â
You know exactly what sheâs referring to; You mightâve drank a bit too much at your friendâs birthday dinner. And Christmas party⊠and when you all went to the fair, but it was all in good fun! Youâre young and living life; Ellieâs always a bit dramatic when she comments on your drinking.Â
Ellie snatched the bottle and opened it, taking a large swig from it before handing it back. You followed in her lead, taking three large gulps of the liquid, the burn flowing down your throat and into your stomach. Ellie pulled her speaker out of her bag and queued your joint playlist.Â
The two of you drank and sang and danced until sunset, your vision blurry and legs wobbly. Ellie was sweet enough to help you back to the car, snagging the keys from your pocket before helping you into the passenger side. You tried to talk to her, but she couldnât understand. She always looked so cute when you mumbled nonsense, wispy brows pulled down with a light smile. You felt so happy whenever she was around.Â
She drove you back home and you threw up all over your front yard. Somehow, she snuck past your parent's room without hassle, ushering you into bed. You couldnât stop laughing; Her bright smile only made you cackle louder before her hand pressed against your mouth.Â
â
Ellieâs soft palms moved up and down your arm bare, occasionally squeezing your bicep. You couldnât stop smiling, goosebumps following the drag of her fingertips.
Youâre such a dork, she whispered between snickers.Â
You love me, you said much louder, but she hummed. The look in her eye was suddenly far away. You nervously nibbled at your bottom lip, your eyes dropping to her mouth. Did her lips always look this soft?
You admired every aspect of her face in silence, your index finger continuing to trace over the bridge of her nose, the apple of her cheeks, down to her chin. Ellieâs a sight.Â
Your hazy mind barely noticed the tint on her cheeks, your bedroom dimly lit by the moonlight cascading in from your window. Her eyes were glued to your mouth.Â
She inched closer, her moves subtle. You wouldâve missed it if she wasnât right there.Â
You donât know what came over you, but your mouth pressed against hers. Her lips were stiff against yours, and it made you pull away.
She didnât seem⊠happy, not how you felt. Her expression was gloomy, her eyes flashing with⊠everything and nothing at the same time. You locked up instantly.Â
You love me, Ellie⊠right?Â
Your tongue felt swollen in your mouth when you slurred.Â
Ellie didnât answer, and you held yourself up on your elbow, your brain alarming your legs to get up and leave. To abandon.Â
Ellie⊠d-do you love me?Â
O-Of course I doâ
The tremors in her voice sliced through you like a hot blade. Her confirmation was only meant to appease, your drunk brain told you. Ellie doesnât love you, not like that. Your own parentsâ love is conditional; Why wouldnât hers be?
â
You were never a rebellious kid.ïżœïżœ
Your parents always praised you for being a remarkable role model for your younger siblings: incredible listener, studious, eager to help others. They never failed to highlight, amplify, pressure your good behavior. But their doting smiles disappeared when you failed to meet their expectations.Â
The transition from middle to high school was rough for you. Your grades suffered and you were surrounded by other kids you didnât recognize, and your âstar-studentâ streak vanished in an instant. Youâve never seen your family so disappointed in you.Â
You broke your back trying to save your academic status for the next few years. You hardly slept, ate, spent time with your newfound friends, and it was all for your parents. They didnât acknowledge you until that offer to join the early-college program came in the mail during your sophomore year. When you accepted that you needed to have something to show to get their affection, you spiraled downward.Â
You swiftly replaced the emptiness in your heart with a bunch of seniors. They agreed to let you tag along if you could hang, so you did whatever was necessary to gain their companionship: started sneaking out, staying out late, going to parties that you had no business being at.Â
Started drinking.Â
Just one sip, loosen up! Little did you know thatâs all it took to get you hooked.Â
The drink was rancid and a gross, murky color. You werenât enjoying it, so why couldnât you put the cup down for the rest of the night? You threw back cup after cup until you were unconscious on the front porch of the house. None of your friends bothered to take you inside where it was safe.Â
You barely recall being hauled back inside and upstairs, plush pillows under your head as you drifted off. When you woke, you swiftly decided that the pounding in your head and the nausea in your gut was worth it. Last night was the freest youâd ever felt. You almost missed the small sticky note stuck on your arm. Someone gave you their phone number, demanding that you tell them if you made it out alive (i hope so.)
You gained a best friend from that sloppily scratched note.Â
Meeting Ellie was a blessing. She was funny, smart and kind. She was so nice to you. None of your old friends treated you like she did. Ellieâs friends were much warmer and welcoming when she introduced you to them for the first time. Every time they had plans, you were invited, no conditions needed.Â
Every vacant space in your heart was filled with something brighter. Itâs unfortunate that your brain has already mastered its attachment to something more dangerous.Â
Ellie⊠for the billionth fucking time, I donât have a problem. Can you just let it go? you scoffed from your bed.Â
Iâll let it go when you cut it out. You canât do shit without it anymore, She spat, pointing at the McDonaldâs cup filled with Tequila. You grinned nastily and sipped your straw. You were so sick of having this conversation with your friends. With her.Â
Yes, I can. Iâm fine. See? You sarcastically rubbed all over your body. Another huge gulp. I dunno why y'all are acting like this. Iâm not the only one that drinks.Â
Youâre not fuckinâ fine, first of all! It was fun at first, but you donât know how to control yourself! Youâre scaring everybody off, Her arms flailed as her voice rose. Youâre so happy your parents are working.Â
You werenât âscaring everybody offâ; You did have some outbursts some time ago, but your friends were still around. They always called you for a fun time, and you were always there to show out.Â
Oh my fucking god, youâre so extra, you got up with your cup, grabbing Ellieâs hand and leading her into the bathroom down the hall. You removed the lid and dumped its contents out; You tried to hide the surge of anxiety as you watched it go down the drain.Â
See? I can stop whenever I want.Â
Then stop, she whispered, sadness in her eyes, No more⊠okay?Â
The emotions flowed through her eyes like water, and it made you uncomfortable. You already wanted a refill, but you nodded to appease her.Â
O-Okay, Ellie, Iâm sorry, you whispered, and she hugged you so tight. Kissed your clothed shoulder, and it gave you solace, even if it was just temporary.Â
But when she left, you were alone, comforted by the temptation of your own thoughts. You broke into your parentsâ locked liquor cabinet that same night.Â
â
When you showed up to exam day drunk, Ellie began to pull away.Â
She didnât bother to beg and yell when you were entranced by your vice. You simply saw her less, and your heart cracked whenever your calls went unanswered.Â
Abandonment was the worst feeling, even more so when itâs a result of something youâve done. Your anxiety spiked significantly when you strolled around campus and your friends ignored you, and it only made you drink more when you got home. The acidic pacifier you discovered was turning you into someone unrecognizable. You were failing, and you were alone. Youâd wished your siblings were older so you could talk to them.Â
Everything came crashing when your parents received an alarmed call from your principal.Â
Youâd been vomiting in the nurse's office for half an hour, and they ended up calling the ambulance. Your stomach was getting pumped hours later.Â
When you regained consciousness, the only thing you could hear were your motherâs hysteric sobs in the hall.Â
â
Summer came along, and you were out of rehab. Withdrawal fucking sucked; It took you almost three weeks to fall asleep in the center.Â
You didnât expect to see Ellie and your friends sitting on your porch when your parents pulled into the driveway, flowers and your favorite candy in hand. Your best friend cried into your shoulder for an hour straight; You refused to let her go as you sobbed into hers. Youâd missed hugging her.Â
When everyone was seated on your parents' couch, you offered to share the secret to get melty, gooey chocolate chip cookies every time. They couldnât stop grinning at you; You were finally back to normal.Â
Ellie spent the night at your house and hugged you to her chest until you drifted off.Â
You accepted that you were a terrible person when all you could think about was a drink. Just one.Â
All the promises you made were broken a few months later, crushed into dust by your own hand. Â
â
Everyone you loved hated you. Liquor always forced you to see the truth in people, melted away the fantasy that you created out of self-preservation. It fueled the rage that you desperately tried to keep hidden from your family; Youâre so fucking mad, and you canât remember why.Â
Your parents hated you; your siblings hated you, your best friend, the one person you have to confide in, the only thing you had left to love, hated you. Everyone hated you, and it was all your fault. Selfishness was the only way one could be a successor.Â
The second Ellie climbed into your parentsâ car with that soft look in her eye, fury swallowed you whole. You barely said a word to her, her favorite song cranked to maximum volume.Â
Ellie? Your voice was quiet, but you were seething. You donât remember why.Â
Hm?Â
D-Do you still care about me? your hands were clenched around the wheel so tightly, you thought it would snap in two. She was suddenly tense in the passenger seat, but she whispered without hesitation. Of course, I do⊠always.Â
But you didnât believe her.Â
Ellie shouldâve never agreed to go on a drive with you.Â
The way Ellie whipped her head towards you was vicious, her hand slamming onto the volume button of your car to silence the noise. You hated how she knew instantly.Â
⊠Are you fucking drunk right now?Â
There it was. All the proof you needed. Confirmation that you were nothing but a disappointment. You hadnât moved from the stop sign. Self-loathing thrashed from the inside; your teeth are bound to crack like glass with the tightness of your jaw.Â
Sheâd whispered your name with so much disdain. A molten tear eased down your face like magma. This was the same residential area you parallel parked in for your driverâs test.Â
Your eyes were glued onto the dimly lit street as Ellie cried and begged for you to stop the car. She admitted to loving you and apologized for everything she said that couldâve hurt your feelings. All you had to do was stop the car and everything would be fine, she said. You pressed the gas so hard; it nearly touched the floor of the vehicle.Â
I love you⊠Please donât do this⊠I love you so muchâŠÂ
Ellieâs last scream was haunting before everything went silent.Â
â
The reality around you never rebuilt itself after that night.Â
You were able to convince yourself that the accident didnât happen for a few weeks. Until your best friendâs burial. According to your parents last voicemail, Ellieâs father wanted to strangle you with his bare hands. You took his life away with one decision. No one contacted you after that. Not your parents, not your siblings, not your friends.Â
You were charged and placed in juvenile detention until you were of legal age, and sent off to prison for another six years after that.Â
Your habit fed you lies about the people you loved most, and it cost the life of your only constant. The one person who tried to get you to change. The purest form of love you had.Â
You killed your soulmate, and you never recovered.Â
PRESENT
You walked until you reached Hattieâs front porch. Your calves were on fire.Â
Your tightly clenched fist pounded on the wood with all the strength you had left. You could see the shadows of someone walking around inside, but she didnât open the door. She probably wanted nothing to do with you after not showing up to work for weeks, but you were desperate.Â
âM-Ms. Hattie, please,â you hollered, âI really need tâtalk to you! Please, pleaseâ â
The door barely creaked open. You expected her to scream and berate you for disrupting her so late in the night, but she was silent. Didnât utter a word. She only peered through the small crack in the doorway, her eyes bloodshot. Her voice sounded graveled, like she hadnât slept in days.Â
âWhat the hell are you doinâ here.âÂ
âMs. Hattie, I-Iâm so sorry. I didnât know where to go,â You harshly wiped your eyes, âMay I pleaseâ â
âNo, you may not,â her glare sliced through you, sharper than any knife. You bawled.Â
âPlease, Iâm begginâ you, maâamâ â
âWhatâŠâ her voice quivered, her gaze breaking away from yours for a split second.Â
âWhat did you do⊠to that girl?â She whispered like it pained her, and it felt like your chest would concave.Â
â⊠W-What?â
The look on her face was enough for you.Â
She knows. She knew.Â
âIt was you,â tears filled the womanâs eyes, âI had a dream that you⊠How could you do that⊠That poor babyâŠâÂ
Your head shook in denial. It was an accident, you wanted to scream, I donât know what came over me! Your eyes squeezed shut and you fell to your knees, thunderous pleads leaving your throat as you begged her to listen. You hunched over and miserably tried to grab at her feet.Â
I loved her, I loved her, I loved her! You couldnât speak.Â
âWhatever happens tâyouâŠâ
âNo, nonono!ââ
âI hope God⊠the universe⊠whoever the hell,â She spat, âHas mercy on you.âÂ
You couldnât stop screaming. Your voice was muffled by the concrete floor.Â
âGet the fuck off my porch.â And the door slammed in your face. You heard the locks click, and just like that, your last inkling of hope shunned you.Â
You hadnât realized youâd been screaming for Ellie until you sat up, burning eyes glued to the dark, cloudy sky.Â
The sun rose from behind as you climbed your apartment steps.Â
The bundle of police cars and black trucks outside the building were an indication of your case being ongoing, but it brought you no comfort. A constant ache was present in your chest every time you breathed. Murmurs erupted from behind as you dragged your body inside, ignoring the deputies who were urging you off the premises.Â
Officers and residents stared at you in confusion, shock, bewilderment the second you hopped off the elevator. Exhaustion was pouring out of you, your under eyes almost black and pajamas wrinkly. You canât recall the last time you showered.Â
The elevator dung, and you made your way down the hall, police tape surrounding your front door. You dodged it and crept in, the sight of the investigators almost sending you into a panic.Â
Terror built in your spine as they gawked at you; Ellieâs fucking with you. Youâre probably asleep right now.Â
âMaâam?âÂ
You shakily turned towards the investigator assigned to your case. âAre you alright?âÂ
No. You nodded, âI came to get some things.âÂ
Some silence passed before you spoke.Â
âI need a place to stay,â your cuticles were scabbing. âAs far away from here as possible⊠if thatâs even allowed.â Your living room felt like it was tipping.Â
Their brows furrowed, scanning over your ragged appearance, âUm⊠The farthest we can place you is about a half hour away. We still need to monitor you⊠Especially now.â You bit the dig with a tilted head.Â
You nearly leaped into the air at the sudden, distant ring in your ears.Â
âWill yâall still cover mâstay?â The tremor in your hands built with the shrilling pierces in your drums.Â
âYes⊠Are you sure everytâ â
âIâm fine! Iâm fiâ Iâm fine!â The shrieks overwhelmed you, both hands coming up to cover your ears, your head pounding. Foreign hands were attempting to steady your hunched form, but to no avail. Your body gave out completely, pained wails leaving your dry lips.Â
Iâm fine, Iâm fine Iâm fine Iâm fineâ
You tried. You tried your hardest, but you couldnât convince anyone â yourself that you were okay. Somethingâs here. When did the air in your home get so cold?
The softest call of your name frosted the blood in your veins.Â
Youâre hallucinating; You have to be. Donât look up. Donât open your eyes.Â
The voice called again, elation enriching her tone. Your head shook in disbelief.Â
It canât be.Â
âL-Look at me. Iâm here! I'm okay!âÂ
No, no no no, you told yourself. Sobs wracked through your hunched form.Â
âLook at me! I love you!âÂ
Shoe-covered feet inched towards you, slowly. Almost⊠cautious.Â
âWake up! Wake up, wake up!â Your whispers were harsh. Urgent. Desperate.Â
A comforting hand rubbed your shoulder. You flinched and wailed, frantically pinching the skin of your wrists. Â
âNO! No, no, fucking get upâ â
âShhh,â Her hand squeezed you, âItâs me.âÂ
Youâre going to fucking puke. Your eyes stayed shut while she cradled you, your head resting on her shoulder. She felt taller, stronger, but she smelled the same. You couldnât move, but she hugged you so tight.Â
Ellie, Ellie, I love you, Iâm sorryâÂ
A kiss on your shoulder. Right over your scar.Â
âI love you more.âÂ
You calmed in her presence as she rocked you on the floor. Your guilt almost made you push her away, but youâre selfish; You need this, for her to hug you.Â
It felt like she held you for years, right on your apartment floor. She didnât let you go.Â
But when your eyes opened, eggshell white hospital walls surrounded you. Kept you trapped in the small hell that Ellieâs created.Â
You havenât slept or eaten. Youâve barely showered.Â
Ellie was with you. Ellieâs with you. You felt her there; She held you! Youâre not fucking crazy.Â
Three days have passed since you were carried out of your apartment by EMTs, according to the investigators that are still terrorizing your fucking home. They assumed you were having a seizure by how still you were. You were unresponsive for minutes, theyâd said. Celeste was right. You didnât have the courage to face her and apologize.Â
You havenât left your motel room since youâve arrived. You hate it in here â it looks like itâs eroding from the outside, the windows are scratched and tinted a murky yellow, the sheets feel like sandpaper, but itâs better than home. Better than being in public amidst your impending psychological breakdown.Â
Ellieâs here. Sheâs watching you and laughing at the wreck youâve become.Â
Youâre slipping; You can feel it. The way she hugged you⊠You couldâve melted into her for eternity when she said she loved you, never to be seen or heard from again, completely under her control. Not that anyone would care about your disappearance. A gutted huff left you.Â
Your past finally caught up to you. Tears flooded your eyes for the hundredth time tonight.Â
The faint shuffling coming from your bathroom didnât even shock you. Sheâs here again.Â
Your eyes overflowed, and they shut in resignation; Youâre going to die.Â
âE-Ellie?âÂ
Silence.Â
Your eyes squeezed tighter. You have nothing left to fight for.Â
âJust do it! Just fucking do it!âÂ
Thatâs all youâve ever been: a quitter. More shuffling, then silence.Â
âFUCKING KILL ME! KIâ KILL ME, ELLIE!âÂ
You heaved and rose from the edge of your bed. You marched down the seemingly endless hallway, heart cracking in your chest.Â
âKILL ME! KILL ME, KILLME! ââ
Weighted knocks pounded against your room door, shocking you into silence. Sheâs here, sheâs here; Sheâs fucking with you.Â
A dark chuckle left you.Â
âYouâre fucking sick,â You spat with a sniffle, âI hate your fucking guts, just like you hated me! You fucking hate me, right?âÂ
Youâre awake. And youâre angry.Â
You tramped towards the entrance and knocked back just as hard.Â
âFUCK YOU, BITCH! FUCKING â FUCK YOU, ELLIE, YOU FUCKIâ â
Heat traveled across your face the second you ripped the door open.Â
A woman⊠a motel employee⊠with sheets in her hand, visibly stunned.Â
Youâre going fucking crazy.Â
âUhh⊠just came to give you new, uh, sheets,â Her voice was high-pitched, clearly uncomfortable. Your eyes flickered with embarrassment, cheeks blazing.Â
âS-SorryâŠâ You allowed the shorter woman entry, and she scurried over to the small nightstand in the corner of your room.Â
You picked at your fingers, âUm⊠sorry if I scared you. Itâs been a weird⊠fuckinâ weird couple of weeks.âÂ
She didnât acknowledge you at all. Just silently laid the sheets and pillowcases on the side of your bed.Â
âAm I,â You huffed, anxiously rubbing your eyes. âAre you gonna report me or somethinâ?âÂ
Silence.Â
Your brows furrowed at the sudden stillness of the woman, her back turned towards you.Â
âHey, you okay?â A cautious step forward. âLook, Iâm⊠I know it doesnât seem like it, but Iâm fineâ â
âFuck you.âÂ
You flinched at her venomous tone; voice filled with spite. The fuck?
â⊠What?âÂ
âAfter all this timeâŠâ she whispered, the ponytail in the womanâs head shaking in disbelief.Â
âYouâre still the same⊠selfish, psychotic fucking bitch I remember you to be.âÂ
Your knees buckled at the sudden low timbre of her voice. Goosebumps ran up and down your arms at its familiarity. She sounded just like⊠Sheâs⊠It canât be. It canât be, it canât beâ
The one window you cracked for air earlier slammed shut, the clicks from your door signaling your confinement. Youâre trapped.
Your nails sunk into your palms; Sheâs here. Sheâs real and sheâs fucking here and going to kill you.Â
Her laugh filled the room, low and vengeful, and the one lit lamp on the nightstand flickered off.Â
Your breaths were shallow and desperate, sheer panic rushing through your body. You took blind, scurried steps towards the door, feeling around for the knob to take your leave, but it wouldnât budge. You pounded on the wood from the inside, screaming for anyone to come save you.Â
Something cold and slimy slinked around your ankles and roughly yanked you to the floor, your hands scrambling to grab onto anything on the hardwood as they pulled you towards her. You caught glimpses of her glowing, red eyes with every panicked look over your shoulder.Â
You were pulled up, up, up by your feet until you were dangling upside down, her glowing orbs piercing through yours. You barely made out her manic smile, fangs bright and as sharp as knives. Something sharp pressed against your windpipe, ready to tear your throat out.Â
The room she trapped you in disappeared completely, an empty, dark void surrounding her, you. Thereâs nothing anywhere.Â
You hollered as your stomach flipped; Sheâs going to kill you right hereâ
âEllie, please, please donât! ââ
A sharp slice right through your shoulder. You released a pained scream before your vision grew cloudy, body growing limp as you swayed in the air. Your screams quieted, your drowsy mind filling with images of Ellie smiling affectionately at you.Â
Ellie⊠Ellie, pleaseâŠÂ
Trees danced with the wind before everything went dark.Â
Water erupted from your mouth, your eyes ripping open, fingers tearing into the dirt beneath you.Â
You pushed yourself into a sitting position, more water dripping from your hair and clothes, down your bare legs. Pain shot through your shoulder with every move. You reached to touch it and⊠ouch. Blood coated your fingertips.Â
You gazed around. You knew exactly where you were, but it was off.Â
You and Ellieâs hideout. The campground is exactly how you remember, but it was darker, murkier, less inviting and cozy. Familiar, yet foreign.Â
âMiss me?âÂ
You jolted, scurrying away from whatever was behind you.Â
âAww, donât be scared,â Ellie mocked, fake pout pulling at her lips. âCâmooon, itâs just me! Welcome to my humble abode!âÂ
What the fuck, what the fuckâ
The same appendage from earlier wrapped around your leg, yanking you back, and your heart sank. Your eyes were deceiving you; They had to be.Â
Ellie, much taller and stronger than you remember, stood over you, pupils pitch black, a devious smile spread across her face, sharp fangs glimmering in the dark. The two horns that swirled atop her head were dark, the protruding veins red and throbbing like they were alive. You saw the sharp edge of her tail glowing behind her head, speckles of red liquid crusting over on the tip.Â
Is⊠Did she cut you with that?Â
Your heart squeezed painfully with familiarity; The small spots that dusted her face and the scars that covered her legs from biking accidents were still there.Â
âE-Ellie?âÂ
She posed, arms extended, âIn the flesh. Kinda. Thereâs no⊠actual flesh for the dead⊠Well, we technically could have skin, but it wouldnât be ours.âÂ
âIâve been lookinâ for you. You look good,â she muttered, eyes dark as they traveled over you. You suddenly felt exposed.Â
Silence passed between the two of you. How was her tone so casual?Â
What the fuck is going onâŠÂ
She huffed at your silence, âDidnât think our ten-year anniversary would be this fucking awkward. Canât even say hi?âÂ
Her words were hardly registering.Â
âHuh.â Her eyes flashed back, and the organ around your leg untangled, retracting into the grass beneath you.
âYouâve⊠youâve been looking for me?âÂ
âMhmm,â she hummed, carelessly playing with her razor-sharp nails. âYou got outta jail, got a place⊠bought the bakery you always talked about. Congratulations, jailbird! You beat the system⊠and were able to outrun the devil for some time!âÂ
She showcased the ashy, decaying scenery like it was a prize. âHereâs your first glimpse into the other side. Is it to your liking? Should I fluff your pending gravestone? Put some roses over it since everyone you love wonât?âÂ
Other side? â⊠Am I dead?âÂ
âNope! Almost. You have a purpose before I take you out. Finally, am I right?â Sarcasm sharpened her tongue.Â
â⊠You're insane,â your voice was hoarse, shattered. You swore your esophagus was bloody.Â
âMe?!â She snickered sickly, eyes darkening, âRemind me what happened between us again? Who hurt who? Who killed who?!âÂ
â⊠Iâ â
You paused. What the fuck do you say to her? I still love you somehow. Please donât hate me forever. Iâm a worthless fuck upâ
âNone of the above,â she interrupted⊠your thoughts? âTo be frank, I donât wanna hear shit from you,â she swayed sassily, circling you like a shark, her tail sashaying around.
â⊠Whyâm I here then?âÂ
She paused, the muscles in her back flexing. Your gut tumbled.Â
Ellie turned to face you, lips curling devilishly.Â
âWell⊠â she trailed off, voice alluring. âIt gets lonely down here. I donât have anybody to call. Nights are so cold.âÂ
She suddenly dropped to her knees, sensuality practically leaking out of her as she crawled towards you. Your heart was thumping, stomach in knots.Â
âI need you⊠to do exactly what I tell youâŠâÂ
Your breaths shuddered the closer she got.
âIâm so fuckinâ hungry⊠Just sit there and let me take what I want,â Her mumbles were drunk and lustful. âYou fucking owe me. Iâm trapped here âcause of you.âÂ
She straddled your lap, eyes glued to yours. They flashed red, and an appendage locked around your throat, knocking the wind from your lungs and pulling you flat onto the dirt. You tried to pull against it, but it tightened on your airways. You choked, pain searing in your shoulder, causing you to let up. Another set of slimy appendages clasped around your wrists, followed swiftly by two locking down your ankles.Â
The burn from your bleeding shoulder made your nipples harden under your filthy sweatshirt. She chuckled above you.Â
âThat was quick,â Her brow arched. âHavenât gotten any? What, no one wants to drill a felon?â She cooed with a pout.Â
You shot her a glare. A squeeze on your throat. A clench from your walls.Â
âOh!â She exclaimed in remembrance. âSorry about that club fiasco. I was gonna fuck you then, but seeing you enjoying yourself got on my nerves, so.âÂ
She rambled on about how she made a whole plan to ruin your life the second she found you until you were rotting in the grave, but you werenât listening. Your eyes moved over her lips, down her neck, over her bare chest, blood burning under your skin. Another squeeze from your cunt. Your face burned with every drop of slick that left you.Â
âThink Iâm cute? The horns doing it for ya?â she interrupted your gawking.Â
You averted your gaze. She snorted before her expression went lubricious, eyes glossing over. Â
âYou smell so good,â she slurred with fluttery lids.Â
No, you donât. You havenât showeredâ
âI meant your pussy, you fucking idiot,â her eyes rolled in annoyance. âYouâre killinâ my vibe. Shut up.âÂ
Your eyes widened in shock; Donât think, donât thinkâ
âShe smelled like that in the club. Just needed some lovinâ, hm?â Her hand reached back to pat your pussy over your pajama shorts and you squealed. Youâre leaking.Â
âOh, sheâs starvingâ â
Fear and arousal flurried in your tummy, âWhatâre you gonna do?âÂ
You could almost see the wires in her head sparking to life. She leaned over you, her cold body pressed against yours, noses almost touching.Â
âIâm gonna rip that pussy open until I feel betterâŠâ The aura around her was smokey and blinding. âAnd thenâŠâ Her nose bumped against yours, almost affectionately. âIâm gonna rip that fucking throat out. Might hang your body from a tree. I needa decorate.âÂ
A choked sob left you, thighs rubbing together as tears plummeted down your temples. Ellie shushed you gently, her forked tongue licking over the droplets before they cascaded down into the grass.Â
Every swipe of her tongue sent a zap through your face. The sting sent your jolt through your spine, hips bucking into her. A hot, slick line ran up your cheek, grazing your jawline, cat-like spines digging into your clammy skin.Â
⊠Is⊠Is she really�
You couldnât stop the shudder that ran up your body, your foot jerking outward at the sensation. The tentacle clenched around your ankles, and you gasped. Ellie was grinding on top of you, whimpering into your neck, marking your skin.Â
âE-Ellie, Elâ â
Another swipe, a thick, sticky trail burning its way into your hairline. Your whines are almost inaudible. Pain is burning up your legs when the organ twisted tighter; Youâre shocked your ankle didnât snap in two.Â
She moved faster on top of you, pleasantly sighing into your neck. Your face is fucking sizzling.Â
âWhat the⊠fuck,â The situation is settling in for you: Ellieâs dead⊠but, not? And sheâs humping you like a dog. You shouldnât want to watch her, observe the love of your life get off on your fucking stomach, but you â your pussy wants it â needs her.Â
You missed her so fucking much.Â
Soft chuckles erupted from her, icy breath on your neck. She sat up, rubbing her bare cunt on your tummy.Â
âYou wanna watch?âÂ
No, no no pleaseâ
Your head shook, mind racing with pleads for her to touch you, but she stared back in disapproval.Â
âI think you wanna watch,â She sat up, lifting her knees and resting her freezing hands on your thighs, her pretty pussy on full display, âMissed me that bad?âÂ
Sheâs right there, but you canât move. More tears, more begging from you.Â
âWanna see a trick I learned?â She inquired mischievously. You didnât have a chance to answer before more vine-like organs emerged from the dirt, eager and throbbing, globs of slick dribbling from their tips.
âWhen youâre sad and horny, answers will eventually fall in your lap,â She watched the appendages sliver all over her shoulders, her back, down her stomach. Her head flew back, her short flyways waving around her horns.Â
âI bet that fucked up head of yours never expected this would happen, huh? Never thought youâd see me like this?â She moaned out as the suctioned limb traveled over her left nipples, her eyes beaming red, scorching through your chest.Â
Your walls squeezed down on nothing, desperate groans leaving your throat, underwear clinging to your cunt. You couldnât close your legs, the members slinked around coming up to suck on your thighs.Â
Nasty little cuck, her voice boomed through your skull, Wanna watch me get fucked, right?
Your head bobbed dumbly. The appendages scurried down her body. You watched as the veins in her horns glowed brighter, her eyes shading an even deeper scarlet, her lip catching between her teeth when the suctions came in contact with her clit.Â
The slippery members attacked your thighs with strong suctions, the sensitive skin littered with blotchy, dark spots. A wet slither made its way up your body, under your sweatshirt and in between your tits. The tip teased both nipples, your back arching deeper for more friction. The air was muggy and your body was disgustingly sticky; The sensations made your clit jerk.Â
You blearily stared up at Ellie, nearly cumming at the sight of her with a thick, throbbing appendage fucking into her pussy, another two attacking her nipples. Her walls were stretched around the dark, pulsing tentacle, her juices filling the open air with sopping squelches.Â
Her eyes fluttered open and refocused on you, a dark line of drool dripping from her mouth and landing on your exposed torso. You released a pained shout, your skin burning at the contact. Tension built tight in your core, clit throbbing in your underwear. Youâre struggling to breathe, head floating further into the clouds with each whimper from Ellie. She giggled hazily, moans sounding between her condescending snickers. She gathered spit in her mouth and allowed it dribble onto one of your breasts.Â
Sâhitting it sâgood! Fuck, I canâtâ
Finally, finally, the tentacles choking your legs unraveled and crawled up, closer to your drenched cunt. Just one touch â you need one touch and youâll cum. Just one, just one, please, pleaseâ
Slut needs tâcum? Beg some fuckinâ more, câmon, Ellieâs moans and shouts in your head were somehow bringing you closer to that peak you desperately craved.Â
âPlease, El, please, fuck⊠meâ â
âIâm â oh, fuck, yesâ â
Your shorts and underwear were being ripped from around your waist, yanking you in all directions. The friction made your walls constrict tight. The harsh suctions on your clit were instantaneous. Finally, finally, finallyâ
You and Ellieâs moans melted together, colors floating behind your eyelids. The wet sounds from Ellieâs pussy made your peak build in record time, zoning in on her cries. Youâre going to cum so hard. Itâs almost there, just a little bit moreâÂ
Ellieâs everywhere. In your head, line of blurry vision, on top of you, about to break and shatter. She's so perfect, shrouded in darkness and gloom and desire.
The tentacle suddenly expanded inside her pussy, stretching it wider, massaging all the spots that made her see white.Â
âMâgonna fucking cum, sâgonna make me cumâ â
Youâre so close, youâre close, youâre close. You wordlessly begged her to cum with you. Her knees trembled while her legs begged to close, but she forced them open. Forced herself to take everything, all of it. The tentacle pulsed sporadically inside her, and she crashed.Â
Pleasure was snatched away from you in an instant, the suckles on your clit gone. You cried and sobbed for Ellie to make you cum, but she ignored you, her body wracking in pleasure, heavy globs of black slick dribbling from her cunt, right under your tits.Â
She rode it out, bouncing on the large appendage before it shrunk to its original size. It jerked inside her a few more times before leaving her completely, more dark, gooey liquid dripping from her pussy.Â
She came down slowly, giddy laughs leaving her swollen lips as her walls rippled from the aftershocks.Â
âThis is gonna beâŠâ she scooped up some of the substance with her razor-like nails before shoving them into your mouth.Â
The peculiar twang coated your tastebuds. She continued.Â
âSo much fun.âÂ
You never thought youâd have the chance to kiss Ellie again.Â
But you are, and youâre so fucking nervous.Â
When you kissed her for the first time, you were confident, impulsive, reckless. Your regret didnât come until after, but now here you two were, her split tongue messily sliding over yours, your tongue sizzling from the venom coating her mouth. Ellieâs mess seeped into your skin with each jerk of her hips. Youâd give anything to touch her.Â
Your eyes squeezed shut every time she suckled on your lips, licked up your chin, squeezed her hand over your throat. Sheâs much more secure this time around; Itâs almost enough to get you there.Â
Almost.Â
You were suddenly yanked back by your hair, head thudding the ground. Ellie seemed deep in thought, eyes distant.Â
âYouâre a bad kisser.âÂ
Your lip quivered. Ouch, âS⊠SorryâŠâ
âEllie?â Your throat burned.Â
âYes, dear?â
Her tone made you flinch. Everything you wanted to say left your brain in a cloud of smoke.Â
âAm⊠Am IâŠ?â
âAre youuuâŠ?â She trailed off. Her hand disappeared, lower, before a loud, sticky noise blaring in your head. She sighed happily; Ellieâs touching herself. Right in front of your face.Â
Your face is on fire and your shoulders are cramping up.Â
âWill⊠Can I, can I cum?âÂ
âI donât know⊠can you?â She shrugged with a smile.Â
Your eyes nearly rolled in annoyance; they wouldâve if you werenât so desperate to be fucked senseless.Â
She sat up fully, her wet hand reaching right in between your legs. They nearly clamped shut on her wrist, but more tentacles appeared to hold them open for her. She wasnât looking at your pussy, but she knew exactly where to touch you. She rubbed her own juices into your clit, a nasty shhlck filling the calm air.Â
Tears built in your eyes at the sensitivity, your toes digging into the dirt beneath you. Her thoughtless mumbles were barely registering in your melting brain. Your impending orgasm nearly crashed into you before she stopped.Â
Your body tensed and your pleasure dissipated. Sobs left your mouth as you garbled, âEâllie, please, please, no moreâ â
âDonât close your legs, I mean it. Take what I give you like a good bitch,â Ellie shimmied down your body, resting in between your legs. The tentacles hooked under your knees and forced them up, holding them right against your chest. You canât see what Ellieâs doing and sheâs silent.Â
You wanted to ask what was taking so fucking longâ
A loud crack rang through the heavily wooded area, pain searing through your thigh. The stinging sensation brought tears to your eyes, sobbing softly to yourself.Â
The sudden flicking against your clit brought tears to your eyes. Sheâs touching you, finally. Your arms pulled at the veiny tentacles still clamped around your wrist, aches running down to your shoulders at the stiffness.Â
Ellieâs fingers were replaced with something much softer, and your body turned to mush. The appendages around your thighs twisted tighter, gripped harder, as the barbs from her tongue caught on your clit. It felt so fucking good; her split muscle moved so quick on your clit; your yelps of her name sound into the crisp air. Youâve been on the verge of cumming this entire time, but you canât.
Suddenly, her tongue is easing downward, brushing against your perineum. Your hips tried to push down into her muscle, but to no avail. You could feel numbness building in your feet from the restriction.Â
Look at this tight little ass, two of her fingers were massaging your other hole, causing you to whimper.Â
Yeah? she pressed down harder, Like it right there?
Your head gravely bobbed in approval; youâve never been touched there, but you crave it now.Â
Tiny fucking hole⊠gotta get you ready, huh?
Her voice is thick and haughty; youâre shivering.Â
A glob of spit lands on your ass, the sensitive skin tingling, numbness spreading across the pulsing area. She rubbed it in quickly and gave your hole one last slap.Â
Her tongue was back at your cunt; you squealed at the sensation of her tongue slivering past your entrance, walls stretching over her muscle. The soft splinters massaged your walls just right, caressing all the spots inside you and you felt it building âÂ
Suddenly, her tongue stretched wider, expanded, pressed down on your walls, right on your spot; you were squirting on her tongue seconds later. You couldnât warn her of your orgasm before you bursted, walls desperately milking her as satisfied shouts escaped your lips, your brain turning to goo.Â
âEl â mmh! Fuck, yes, rightthere! ââ
Sniveled thank yous were pouring from your lips as Ellie fucked into you, your juices coating her face. Bursts of color exploded behind your eyelids.Â
You thought you would never come down, but the intensity of your orgasm slowed, eyes slowly blinking open. Your vision was spotty; Ellie slowly pulled out, humming at the squeals that left you. You couldnât move.Â
Suddenly all the tentacles were gone, limbs free and weightlessly plopping onto the ground. Your eyelids fell shut in exhaustion, your heart flooding with longing.
âThe fuck do you think youâre doing?â A light kick on your shoulder.Â
EllieâŠÂ
âGet the fuck up. Iâm not done,â she snorted coldly.Â
Ellie⊠pleaseâŠ
âWhat the fuck did I say,â The agitation in her tone rose.Â
Iâm so sorryâŠÂ
âI donât care,â You were suddenly pushed onto your back, Ellie standing over you, eyes glowing dimly.Â
I miss you so muchâŠÂ
Memories of your past flowed through you, soft sobs shaking your weak form. Ellie deserved⊠everything good out of life. The purest forms of happiness were destined in her path, and you took it away. You took everything from her, and all you could do was watch what sheâs become. What you caused.Â
The more you cried, the more disgusted she seemed, eyes growing darker.Â
She pounced on you in seconds, nails grasping your bunched sweatshirt and sharp tail tip prepped to end you right then and there, speckles of spit splattering on your face due to her shouts.Â
âDON'T!â The dying world around you shook with the bass of her tone. âDonât you fucking dare!âÂ
You didnât fight. You allowed her to berate you, call you every vile name in the book, and digested her wishes of you dying instead of her. Every scream slammed into your chest; you merely laid there, ready to die with love in your chest.Â
I love you⊠I love you⊠I love youâŠÂ
âFUCK YOU, YOU LYING BITCH! FUCK YOU! YOU FUCKING DID THIS TO ME! IâM GONNA KILL YOUâ â
Bloody streams fall from Ellieâs eyes, the veins in her head changing from maroon to coal, the veins in her arms darkening as her voice deepened, razorous teeth baring. She sobbed and screamed from above you, wailing how much she hated you. Youâre numb.Â
The venom from her tail was discharging from the tip. Itâs time; itâs your last day alive. You nodded to yourself. You deserve this; Youâre ready. You hope your siblings arenât too saddened by your disappearance.Â
Is this the final stage of grief? Your body is lax and accepting, heavy droplets leaving your eyes when they shut.Â
I love you⊠Iâm sorry⊠I love youâŠÂ
Another sharp prick went through your shoulder, and darkness enclosed around you.Â
JUNIOR YEAR: 2012
Youâre such a dork!
Ellie swears her heart is going to grow legs and crawl up her throat in the next thirty seconds if you keep staring at her like that. She's projecting; Sheâs the dork!
The few shots she took at the lake were wearing off, and her nerves were finally catching up to her. She was surrounded by your pillows, your stuffies, your scent; she could barely swallow, her throat was so dry.Â
You love me.Â
She does. Ellie never acted on her swiftly developed crush; sheâs not built for rejection, especially from you. The smile on your face was so bright; your joy was so apparent whenever she was around. She hoped her own happiness reflected the same way; Please love me back! Please please pleaseâ
Her heart exploded, sewed itself back together, only to explode again when your hand came up, fingertips barely grazing her cheek. Sheâs going to faint; your touch was so soft. Was she crazy to compare the feel of your hands to rose petals? She tried to keep her nuzzles subtle, pushing her face closer to your hand; Is this how cats feel when they want cuddles?Â
You proceeded to explore her face in silent adoration, and she did the same, memorizing every detail she could. The moles on your face were lined like stars.Â
She scooted closer to give you more access to her now burning skin, and you kissed her. Ellie was stunned, body stiff; she didnât have a chance to kiss you back before you pulled away. The scent of alcohol was pouring from you, and Ellie snapped back to reality.Â
Youâre drunk. You kissed her and youâre drunk.Â
Youâre probably not going to remember the entire night when you wake the next morning. Ellieâs eyes nervously searched your now downcast face. Say something, you coward!Â
But you spoke first.Â
You love me, right?Â
More than anything, Ellie wanted to scream, not caring if your parents woke up and kicked her out. But she couldnât. Her brain was moving a million miles a minute, trying to find the words that would satisfy her feelings, but they were too strong. Sheâs in too deep; Words arenât enough.Â
But you look broken and your bodyâs tense. Sheâs putting you on edge and she hates herself for it.Â
Do you love me? Your begging tone snapped her out of her head.Â
Of course I do, she gasped, mouth gaping like a fish.Â
More than anything! More than anything! I love you!Â
You only nodded, relaxed back into her, and shut your eyes.Â
Ellie went to sleep with a terrible feeling in her stomach, but she held you anyway.Â
Ellieâs weight crushed you as she sobbed into your neck, her cries loud and guttural, the sharp puncture of her horn pressing into the plush of your cheek. Her curses grew weak and quiet, mumbles of I fucking hate you cementing into your skin.Â
You simply laid beneath her, unmoving and stunned wordless at the memory â the truth that Ellie exposed to you. Her body jerked on yours as she wailed.Â
You hardly noticed the fresh tears rolling down your face. You sniffed, âEllieâŠâ
She sobbed, her head shaking dismissively.Â
âEllie⊠Look at meâŠâ You couldnât move.Â
âFuck you,â her choked murmur was hushed.Â
A sad smile grew on your face.Â
âAlmost didâŠâÂ
Ellie sniffed harshly against the burnt skin on your neck, almost touching your bloody shoulder, âWhat.â She mumbled flatly.Â
âYâknow⊠you almost did fuck me.âÂ
Some silence passed before a wet snort came from below you. Your grin widened.Â
Ellieâs shoulders shook slightly as she snickered into your neck, arching hers slightly to look at you.Â
âI should kill you for that, you cunt. Youâre not funny.âÂ
Your body jerked with laughter, and you grimaced at the pain in your shoulder. âThat's what you get.â Ellie sat up straight, smile slowly dissipating, eyes glossing over.Â
The light moment between you shifted, and sorrow weighed you down like bricks.Â
âI fucking loved you,â Ellie whispered harshly. âI wanted you to be happy. And you didnât fucking care.â Anger was radiating off her, but the dread in her eyes was more telling. âYou were⊠everything to me.âÂ
The wounds in your heart were overflowing; your efforts of repairing your heart were proved pointless, blood and love and suffering filling your chest to the brim. Quiet sobs were shared between the two of you.
âPlease k-kiss me,â Ellieâs eyes squeezed shut at your hushed proposal.Â
âJust one more. You can do whatever you want⊠just one last time.âÂ
You sat up slowly, ignoring the deep aches in your side, your trembling hands cautiously raising to cup Ellieâs frosty cheeks.Â
Her face is so close; her lips are right there⊠just one more, just oneâ
Ellieâs eyes traveled across your face, lust and years of longing flooding in her tears. Her eyes shut and she leaned forward, her cold lips melding against yours. The kiss was gentle, your eyes squeezing shut as you cried, your tears transferring onto her cheeks.Â
Ellieâs hushed tone filled your head.Â
I wish I hated you.Â
You choked a sob, arms wrapping around her hips to pull her closer, her arms enclosing around your neck, the kiss growing hotter. You needed her closer; so much closer.Â
Her tongue slid past your mouth, the split muscle messily flicking over yours as her hips bucked down. You heard loud tears of cloth coming from behind you as Ellie shredded your sweatshirt with her claws, discarding the fabric on the dark heaps of grass.Â
She sighed into your mouth when you laid her back onto the grass soaking, crawling on top of her. Her legs wrapped around your waist, pulling you down to reconnect your mouths, her fangs cutting into your bottom lip. She sucked the injured skin, humming at the metallic taste; your hips bucked down harder to meet hers, and she whimpered.Â
Her hands were freezing as they slid down your bare sides, claws pressing into your hips. You could feel your heart pounding in your throat as you kissed down her neck, soft noises of satisfaction erupting from beneath you. You suckled on her throat, tongue sliding down to her jaw and back up again.
âCan I, fuck, let me do somethingâ â
You moaned in approval, thighs shaking at the sound of her voice, coming back up to press your mouth against hers.Â
A heavy gasp left you at the feel of slime dripping onto your thigh. Ellie dug her nails into your hips to steady you, and you whined at the sting. You stared down, entranced at her gleaming eyes, bottom lip trapped between her teeth.Â
âHold still.â Ellieâs whisper was strangely comforting, your body relaxing into hers. The light suck on your thigh made you squeak, chuckles releasing from the girl beneath you.Â
âAnd youâve been doing this for how long?â you jokingly snarked, voice shaky.Â
âMeh, six years, nothing crazy,â she replied, shrugging sarcastically. âJust donât move.âÂ
Ellieâs hand moved lower, pressing at the end of your spine to deepen the arch in your back. She shushed your eager whimpers, slowly easing your hips back until your cunt brushed against the serpent-like organ. You shuddered and attempted to jerk away at the strange sensation, but Ellie held you still, snorting to herself.Â
A sharp gasp escaped your lips at the feel of its tip swirling at your clit, your head dropping onto Ellieâs shoulder. It took mere seconds for the suction to attack your sensitive clit, pleasured moans huffing from your mouth. Ellieâs mouth was right by your ear, her chilled breaths sending shockwaves down your spine. Your clit throbbed under the pressure: how were you already on the verge of cumming?Â
âFeels g-good? Yeah?âÂ
Your walls were squeezing down harshly, desperate to hug and milk something hot through your orgasm. It takes all your strength to lift your head and kiss Ellie, but she does all the work; licking into your mouth, sucking on your tongue, bruising your lips with every slice of her fang. Every pass of her tongue is a pull in your gut, your clit pulsating with vigor.Â
She pulled back, just barely, to whisper how excited she is to fuck you, to turn your pussy out, to make you cry. Your moans were loud and eager, your head bobbing dumbly in compliance with anything she wanted. Youâd give her everything you could in this moment.Â
Ellieâs in your head, in your senses, in between your thighs, and youâre losing it. Sheâs reaching at you, tugging at your body in any way she could: scratching at your tits, pulling your hair, clawing into your skin with intent to scar. Youâre sure your back is bloody. Her touch is painful; why does it feel so good?Â
Your thoughtless head drops yet again as your orgasm is forced out of you, your walls choking the hot air surrounding the two of you. Your wails are muffled along with Ellieâs spat praises, your hips bucking back for more. The pleasure is almost too much and youâve barely started; She hasnât even fucked you yet.Â
Your juices are pooling out of you, knowingly making a puddle on Ellieâs tummy, her affirmed moans pulling more and more out of you. Your peak is unrelenting, draining every last bit of energy your body has left. Your limbs gave out, your weight crashing on top of Ellieâs.Â
She hastily maneuvered you onto your back, the spines of grass puncturing your skin from beneath you as she climbed on top.Â
âYour staminaâs fucked.âÂ
Her winded snide remarks didnât bother you; you need her to fuck you. Youâre sweaty and desperate to feel her everywhere. She wasted no time, reuniting your mouths in an eager kiss as her hands ventured anywhere they could. Your bodyâs aching, but for some reason, you crave more. More hurt, more pain; You need her to use you.Â
The world around you moved like water; unlike your first dream, the waves brought comfort. Ellieâs touch felt like the ocean washing you away, all with effort to finally bring you peace.Â
But it didnât work. You love her; You deserve pain, and you love her.Â
Her mouth is on your tits, biting and sucking at your nipples. It feels so good to have her this close; your bodyâs wet and ready for her to ravish you.Â
Ellie scurried down your body, sat on her knees in between your legs, her hands pressed under yours to hold them up. Your thighs are resting on your chest as Ellie dribbles a line of slobber over your soaking lips. Hums fill the space between you as it slides down, right over your entrance.Â
Seconds pass as Ellie stares at your cunt; You call out to her by mistake.Â
âWhat.âÂ
Fuck. âNo-nothing. Sorry.â
âYou want something. Say it.âÂ
You shake your head, and she smiles. Raunchy imagery of her fucking your pussy flash across your mind in an instant, and her grin widens.Â
You jolt at the sudden slap on your cunt before Ellie presses your legs even higher, knees almost next to your head. You ignore the aching stretch in your limbs and reach to grab your ass cheeks, holding them open for her. Heat spreads across your face when she moans at the sight.Â
Oh fuck, Ellieâs whimpering to herself; whining about how good your pussyâs going to feel, how youâre going to swallow her whole, choke her out. Juices are oozing from your cunt with each jerk of your walls.Â
A tentacle emerges from the ground, and Ellieâs expression darkens. Itâs lecherous; the way she eyes your pussy as the organ slivers closer to your entrance. You couldnât hold your moans in anticipation of the stretch. Itâs right there, swelling and twitching.Â
Your head falls back against the sopping grass when your hole grasps the wide, leaking tip, eyes rolling into your head as Ellieâs moans ring deep in your skull. The tentacle is practically melting between your walls as they spasm.Â
Ellieâs so loud above you, completely hunched over your form as her body shudders, her lip trapped between her sharp teeth. They mustâve pierced the skin, a thin trail of black liquid dripping all the way down her neck.Â
You take it so fuckinâ good, Ellieâs slurring, tongue swelled in her mouth. Youâre already peaking, your legs attempting to slam shut at the tight hug of your walls. The organ is suddenly swelling, walls stretching around the girth to trap it as deep as it can go. Tears are running down your face, groans of Ellieâs name melding with your harsh breaths.Â
Seconds pass, and the tentacleâs shooting inside, and your head goes blank, your orgasm slamming into you. You're silent as it wrings your body. The intensity is almost painful, like itâs being forced from your body and your cuntâs drained dry: itâs hot inside you where the fluid pools, and your walls are sucking it deeper.Â
You didnât register Ellie falling forward, her body convulsing on yours, screams of how good your cunt is leaving her in a flurry. Her words are gritted and deep and her nails are in your bicep, but the pain only makes you cum harder.Â
Itâs been minutes, and youâre deadweight, walls twitching around the still jerking organ planted deep inside your guts. No time to recover, though; Ellieâs pulling out, a nasty sound echoing at her departure as cum seeps â drenches the grass under you. Itâs never-ending and sticky and you need more.Â
Ellieâs already up and moving you onto your stomach, your cheek pressed against the dirt. Sheâs hasty, spitting on your cunt with a fiery just a dumb slut, huh? You nod, squeezing your walls to push more cum out. There are heavy suctions on your back, forcing blood to the surface at the curve of your spine. Followed by a sharp stabbing on your ass cheek.Â
Ellieâs mouth is on your supple skin, and the blood in your ass rushes to the surface. Her fangs are locked into you as she empties the veins in your ass.Â
You couldnât even scream, eyes squeezing shut at the searing pain as your walls release more cum. Ellie hums: another bite. More bloodâs leaving you, being sucked from your ass, your thighs, the end of your spine, but itâs not enough. You need more. Ellieâs draining you but itâs not nearly enough.Â
Another tentacle presses in once more, and your visionâs blurring; thereâs another tentacle sucking at your ass, your eyes crossing at the stimulation of both your holes. Ellieâs nails are breaking the skin of your back, dribbles of blood sliding down your sides and into the dirt. You love her and you love it; everything feels so warm and full and good.Â
Ellieâs chides are making you wetter; your thighs wonât stop shaking, she sounds so sexy. Every shockwave in your brain is memorizing every word, every syllable. She's babbling about how she might spare, keep you trapped here forever so she can drain your blood through your pussy, suck you dry, and it gets you there again.Â
Ellie â mâcuâcumming!
You donât know what youâre saying; voice muffled against the dirt, tears and snot running down your face while you squeal like a pig. Ellieâs calling you one as you squirt on her, just a dumb, worthless pocketpussy; The smile on your face is stupid as your walls drain her while she throbs inside you. Youâre so stuffed with her cum already, but you need more inside you. You feel so fucking good and the pleasure wonât seize.Â
It picks up again as the thrusts get faster, hitting you deeper, just where you need it. You donât get to recover before youâre slung into another mind-numbing orgasm, your body wracking without rest. Ellieâs massaging every spot that makes your spine break, dirt collecting under your nails as they puncture the ground. Your groans are cracking in your throat; You canât even swallow.Â
The tentacleâs swelling again, and Ellieâs hand is on the back of your head, pressing your cheek against the grass, nails scratching at your scalp as you beg for her cum. Her moans are picking up again, demanding that you beg some more, that you fucking cry for it, be a good girl a bleed for me. And you do.Â
As messily as you can; slobber pooling at your mouth as you sob and choke for her cum, eyes crossed in your skull as your tongue lolls, and Ellieâs shooting in you again, stuffing you to the brim as she cries your name from behind, grunts leaving her with each rope of cum seeps in your womb.Â
Your pussyâs melting around her when the sucking at your ass pauses, only to push in the incredibly tight space, to stretch your virgin hole open around its girth. It should hurt, having both holes filled to such a wild degree, but it doesnât. Your weak arm is reaching behind, desperately grabbing at Ellie. You expect her to smack you away, to hit you, to slice your hand clean off your wrist, but she doesnât; You almost miss the light touch, her pinky lacing with yours.Â
Youâre joyous, head dropping as you sob from pleasure and happiness, heart filled with a love that you never thought youâd feel again.Â
Sheâs drilling your ass, fucking you so hard and good as she holds your smallest finger with hers, kissing down your bloody back, licking up the scarlet that leaks from your skin. Suddenly, another tentacle â much smaller than the ones tearing your holes up â emerges from the ground, right in front of your face, its juices leaking onto your cheeks.Â
It wiggles in front of your open mouth before shoving in; the taste is salty and metallic, but your lips work it, sucking and licking all around the length. You feel so filthy and itâs making your tummy tug, another orgasm building in your pussy and ass. Itâs going to shatter you completely from its strength, you can feel it.Â
Your bodyâs aching for more cum; youâre surprised itâs not coming spilling from your throat and onto the appendage in your mouth. But Ellieâs close, every whisper becoming more frantic as she rides that edge.Â
Youâre mine, she whispers in your ear, Fucking mine, you understand? Youâre not going anywhere.Â
You get it, you get it! Youâre never leaving her again. Fuck everything youâve built for yourself! Your life is pointless without Ellie next to you. Youâre going to cum so hard for her.Â
Your bodyâs hers; Your heart is hers; your soul is hers. You love her, you love her!Â
Baby likes that? I own this fucking pussy?Â
She knows she does: whispers so gross and conniving and youâre twitching under her. Youâre babbling around the swelling appendage, telling her â screaming that you belong to her, you always have. You always will!Â
You feel her teeth as she grins madly in satisfaction, sloppily mumbling mine mine sâ my pussy against your skin as she swells inside you. Youâre stretching, gaping around her and you snap, head planting into the dirt. Both sets of walls clamp down sporadically around the large digits between them, the tentacle slipping from your mouth as you scream.Â
Ellieâs exploding inside both holes, the tentacle above you spraying all over your face, heavy globs of cum landing in your hair, the back of your neck, splattering on your mouth, anywhere it could reach. Juices are spraying from between you, and Ellie falls forward, her freezing chest on your back as she jerks on top of you. Hearing her just as destroyed from the pleasure sends another surge of euphoria through you, somehow stronger than the first.Â
You can barely take it, but Ellie makes you, continues flooding your holes until theyâre overflowing and sticky. Youâre both sent to another plane as you convulse together, her pinky still locked with yours as you lose consciousness.Â
When you wake, thereâs warmth.Â
Youâre still filled to the brim with cum, but your form is blanketed. Small, tired huffs hit your back as Ellie shivers on top of you, barely audible noises alerting her satisfaction. You smile.Â
You can't move; all your strength is used to wiggle the cramped muscle of your interlocked finger. Tears well in your eyes when Ellieâs finger hugs yours tighter with every small movement.Â
Ellieâs the blanket; Ellieâs warm.Â
Suddenly, everything around you is pink, the formerly empty spaces in your heart filled with affection. You missed Ellie so much; Youâre finally reunited, and in love. You canât stop smiling, and neither can she.Â
â
â
â
âBREAKING NEWS: BAKERY OWNER FOUND DECAPITATED IN MOTEL BEDâ
Today marks one of the most heart-wrenching, horrifying days that our community has ever seen, the local reporter stated. We have never witnessed a case end this disastrous.Â
To the loved ones of this individual, we share our deepest condolences. The victim made such a large impact on our tiny town with her small business. Nobody⊠the reporter sighed, Nobody couldâve seen this coming.Â
Please be on the lookout for any updates regarding the suspect. Investigators are putting as much effort into this case as they can. Police suggest staying indoors with your loved ones this holiday until further instructions.Â
May God be with her family. Have a blessed night.Â
idk how to use picsart sorry yall LOL
taggiesss ily thank u 4 being patient :D :
@digit4lslut @hrtmal @sawaagyapong @starologist @shurisbigtoe @iamtootiredtopost @elliew-illiamsmissingfingers @sarahsmileslikesarahd0esntcare @slutty4abby @chrry1ovr @moonchild184 @womenofarcane @ohlawdthebirds @ellabsprincess @inf3ct3dd @aouiaa @dropsofs4turn @masclover111 @dyk3ang3l @zzzlove @jayy2inlovee @aandersonsbackpack @jade-posts-sometimes @elspeanut @elsbunny222 @alittlextrahoney @ultraviolenceellie @shamelessparty @0verthebluemoon @yuckyfucky
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click! 4 (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you need a roommate, and you love eggplant. [college au]
WORD COUNT: 6.7kÂ
WARNINGS: photographer/roommate!ellie, ocs an artist with a rep and black, angst⊠these hoes toxic, crazy sexual tension, kissing!!! :), fondling, dry humping, fingering!!, some dirty talk uh oh, slight unrequited love, bad communication⊠like awful, more slut shaming, mentions of awful parents, brief mention of alc and weed
This eucalyptus face mask is not doing what itâs supposed to!Â
Ultimate calming effect! Relaxation is at your feet and on your face!Â
⊠Yeah, right. Why is your blood pressure touching the ceiling, then?Â
Itâs fucking Sunday and itâs dark outside. Itâs not even seven yet. You can hear rustling in the living room and you know Ellieâs prepping for today. Your anxiety is through the roof and in the clouds!Â
Why the fuck did you accept this much responsibility again? What if you look like a fucking idiot and she fires you? Is this even a job if itâs a one-time thing? Your hands are sweating. Is it too late to jump out your window and plummet to your death?
Meow! Meow!Â
âGood morning, baby girl! Are you hungry?â You hear Ellie coo through the wall and your heart sores. You'd be smiling so wide if this mask wasnât solid concrete.Â
You walk into the living room and are blinded by the bright ceiling lights. Your bill is going to skyrocket!Â
âHi.âÂ
Ellie, cat in arms, jumps at your voice, spinning to face you. Your skin is on fire as her eyes glaze over your appearance, cheeks tinting and fingers twitching under the thick fur.Â
âHey⊠you look⊠you look nice,â She mutters back, and you smile.Â
âThank you.âÂ
Meow!
Ellieâs brow arches at the baby. âYeah? You think so, too?âÂ
Meow! Meow!
Ellie sets her down and lets her roam, shoving her hands into her sweats. She takes a step closer. âWhatâre we gonna name her?âÂ
âToothleâ â
Ellie rolls her eyes, âOh my god, thatâs so fucking basic.â
âWell, excuse me! Iâll shut the fuck up!â You snark playfully, âWhat were you thinking, Ms. I donât fuck with animals?â
âI already told yoâ â
âAHT, AHT!â You hold a finger up to hush her and she scoffs, âToothless is one of the best animated characters of our time! Loyal, cute as fuck! Fuck everybody else in that movie! Show the dragââ
âPickle.âÂ
âWhat.âÂ
âIâve been calling her Pickle! Her name is pickle.â Ellieâs smiling at the pattering kitten, and, for some reason, you donât fight her on it. She looks so happy; Pickle it is.Â
Sheâs clicking her tongue at Pickle who rubs against her covered leg. With those gray sweats on, sheâs luring two cats overâ
âYou ready?â Ellie exhales. Your eyes widen, yanked out of your drifting thoughts. You nod gently, jitters kicking in your fingertips.Â
âSorry you had to wake up this early. It takes a while for me to edit and all that, butâ â
âEllie, donât worry! Iâm â Iâm excited! Just, uh⊠Just guide me, I guess. Youâre the one with the vision.â Youâre not sure if the shoot or Ellie is making you nervous. She smells so good, freshly showered and warmth radiating off of her.Â
â⊠Guide you?â She smirks.Â
Suddenly, the air is hot. âYeah, like⊠tell me what to do⊠f-for the shot.â You awkwardly point at the set.Â
âGiving me permission to use you?â She wisps and your lashes flutter, head bobbing dumbly in approval. The other cat has made her appearance! Sheâs meowing! Somebody stop her!Â
âAlright, then⊠go sit.â Ellieâs head nods towards the black stool in the middle of the backdrop, and youâre moving like a trackstar, plopping down on the stool. Ellie clicks her tongue again and Pickle meows.Â
âGonna put her in my room for now. Donât wanna scare her.â She scoops Pickle up and waddles into the short hallway, giving kit-kat one last kiss before softly shutting her door.Â
Your catless roomie is in front of you in an instant, fiddling with that big ass umbrella before adjusting her tripod.Â
âSo, explain. What does all this do?âÂ
âUmâŠâ she looks through her camera lense. Right at you, âDifferent things. Has to do with light control for the most part. Red is your color, by the way.âÂ
You gaze at your fit; Youâre going to cry. âThanks.âÂ
âMhm.âÂ
Some silence passes before Ellie grumbles, âYouâre slouching.âÂ
Your shoulders instantly straighten. Maybe too much, âNo, Iâm not.âÂ
A blank look from Ellie as she peeks from behind the lense, âDonât slouch. Youâre the star, remember?â She jabs jokingly. You take a deep breath. Another clumsy adjustment trying to find a pose.Â
Ellie snorts as she watches you struggle, and you pout. âI'm sorry! I donât knowâŠâ You move like a robot and she laughs. Why is she walking closer? Oh, fuckâÂ
âHere.â Her hands grab your shoulders, and you go lax, right in her grasp, allowing her to move you however she wants. Her touch is melting your skin through your sleeves.Â
âJust⊠stay there.â Three wide steps, and sheâs behind her camera, âChin down a little.â She mutters. Sheâs encouraging with every instruction you follow, and youâre relaxing. Your movements are small, but by the series of bright flashes, they must be good enough to capture. You hope. Please, God.Â
âStay right there. Thatâs perfect.âÂ
âThatâs it. Yeah, put your leg there.âÂ
âTwist your body a little.âÂ
I like that look, thatâs good. Keep doing that.Â
You donât know what your eyes are doing, but Ellie's eating it up. She doesnât know what her words are doing for your confidence. Sheâs in your ears, in your presence, encouraging everything youâre giving the flashing camera. Your poses get bolder, eyes going softer the more you inspect her.Â
âChin down again. Like⊠look through your lashesâŠâÂ
Ellieâs so focused on you and itâs making your mouth water. Sheâs so calm and controlling, but not overbearing. She lets you take the reins and yanks them when sheâs got something. The twist of your wrist, the flutter of your lashes, the doting expression on your face. Itâs sparking something in her, you can see it from where you sit. She's so attractive when sheâs working.Â
And then she smiles and your heart leaps. Flash.Â
âYou like this.â She notes.Â
Another flash when you smile, âA little. This is fun.âÂ
âOh, yeah? Iâm getting booked for your grad pics?âÂ
Not if you fail statistics! âGonna have to ask my dad! Heâs picky!âÂ
She hums with a light chuckle. âYou look good in these. Heâll like me.âÂ
More flashes, and thereâs scratching at Ellieâs door. She sighs like it pains her to continue, âHold on, baby! Almost done!â She coos at Pickle.Â
She mutters, âIâm gonna take, like⊠ten more. The moodâs gonna change a little if thatâs cool.âÂ
You stop yourself from slouching. âSure, uh⊠what do I do now?âÂ
âImagine love as a vice. Think about the turmoil that comes with losing that feeling for somebody.âÂ
Your mind instantly whirls to Dina and your heart cracks. What a turn of fucking events!Â
âUm⊠is that like⊠isnât that like, a lot?âÂ
Ellieâs unfazed, âEmotions are a lot. Thatâs the point.âÂ
You donât like this anymore. Vulnerability. Blegh. â⊠Okay.âÂ
Sheâs waiting on you, but youâre frozen. You canât stop thinking about every moment you and Dina spent together. Everything was so⊠good. It was filled with happiness. You anticipated every day that came because it meant youâd see her.Â
âAlright?âÂ
You look up at Ellieâs call. You ignore her.Â
âAm I emoting well?â You snicker sarcastically. Youâre aching inside.Â
She studies you, all over your face, but youâre stunted. You donât know what to say.
âYes.â She whispers, and you nod, mind wandering to the darkest parts of your memory. You miss being happy. The cameraâs flashing, but youâre unperturbed. How much will you be able to ruin before you die? If your wallowing is jeopardizing the shot, Ellie doesnât comment on it. You focus on the clock ticks coming from the kitchen.Â
Ellieâs gentle voice pulls you from underwater after a while, âOkay⊠I think thatâs it.â Your breath is ragged and your fingers wonât stop twitching. Youâre up from your seat with a breathy okay, sliding into the kitchen and stealing a water bottle from the fridge. Thereâs cluttering behind you but youâre desperately downing your drink.Â
She's closer than you think. Right behind you, actually! You almost choke when her hand softly closes around your bicep.
âHey, um⊠You okay?â
You swallow harshly and nod, blinking away tears; Sheâs so close, âLove fucking sucks.â You joke wetly.Â
A laugh that caresses your ears escapes her, âDamn. Fuck that shit, then.âÂ
âFinally, someone gets it! Fuck, likeâŠâ You set your water down and wipe away heavy droplets with your free arm. Ellieâs eyes travel over your face, lands of green sparkling in her pupils.Â
âI really appreciate you doing this for me.â She whispers.Â
âOf course!â Your smile is delicate, âI hope thereâs something in there you can use.âÂ
Her head shakes, smile as gentle as rose petals, âI got it, trust me.âÂ
The silence that follows is heavy, your breaths in sync. âWas⊠Are you okay?â Youâve never seen her eyes this delicate. You nod, eyes dropping to her mouth on instinct. Youâre suddenly back in your car, you and Ellie leaning over the center console to get to each other. Her breath is hitting your face again, and youâre itching for her to kiss you.Â
Sheâs reading your body language the closer she gets, checking in, memorizing every green light youâre giving her.Â
âEllieâŠâ You canât even hear yourself. Her hand unravels from your arm, frosting your sizzling cheek like snowflakes. Her warmth is engulfing you, and with one last breath, her lips connect with yours. It's short lasting, though. Ellie pulls away, shock plastered on her face.Â
She's stuttering and slowly backing away⊠or something like that. Youâre not listening, nor do you want an apology. You grab the drawstring dangling from her gray hoodie and yank her closer, mouth pressing against hers.Â
Ellieâs stiffness melts, weightless against you as your mouths mold together. She's sighing, arm wrapping around your waist, warmth simmering between your closed bodies. Your arms wrap around her neck as she inches forward, small steps until you're pressed against the marble.Â
The kiss is slow and steady. You both give in to each other, studying, memorizing every inch of her mouth. Gentle smacks sound in the silent space of the kitchen, clammy hands traveling anywhere they can reach: the nape of her neck, massages on your hips, steadying your stumbles as you push against her. Your fingers inch upwards until they're at her sloppily done bun, loosening the hair tie and pulling as gently as you can, soft strands wrapping around your digits like vines.Â
Ellieâs humming and her hips push against you, so you pull again, smiling gently into the kiss. She pushes again, harder this time, hips languid as they trap you against the counter. Your thighs widen for her, and she takes the lead, hands digging into your thighs and lifting you onto the granite.Â
The kiss turns desperate swiftly after, Ellieâs tongue pushing past your mouth, her hands slowly pulling your tucked shirt from your pants. Youâre biting at her lip, caressing her thighs over her sweats, trapping her between your legs, keeping her close.Â
One last wet smack and youâre traveling down her jaw to the side of her neck, littering kisses all over her burning skin. You try not to make your inhales too obvious, but you canât help it. Her scent drives you up a wall.Â
She follows your lead, trailing sloppy kisses down your neck, sucking the skin, lightly scratching at the skin on your hips. She yanks you closer, nearly sitting you on top of her, ass barely on the counterâ
KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!
You both jolt like youâve been caught, a thin line of spit connecting your bottom lips.Â
âExpecting someone?â She mumbles dazedly, and you silently deny. âAre you?âÂ
âBe serious.â She says flatly.Â
KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!Â
The pounds on the door arenât shit to Ellie, apparently; Her lips are back on you in a second. A gasp surges through you, âOh, fuck! What if someone saw Pickle and theyâre trynaâ â
âSheâll be fine,â she whines between suckles on your throat.Â
You whimper wantonly, but the knocks get aggressive. It has to be Carol! You donât want Ellie to stop, but you push her.
âEâEllieâ â
She releases you with an annoyed huff, giving you enough room to hop off the counter. Scratches and meows alert you once more, and you run to the front door, whisper-yelling to Ellie, âHide Pickle! Hide her!â
âOkay, okay, damn,â She sighs in annoyance, heading back down the hallway. You can hear Ellieâs soft shushes to the kitty, meows swiftly replaced with purrs. You think Pickle has chosen her favorite parent.Â
You yank the door open and your heart plummets.Â
âHey, uh⊠hi.â Abbyâs voice cracks and her nose is glowing red. Your heart pulls in your chest at the sight of her soft eyes.Â
âHi, Abby,â You say softly. She shyly peers at her feet. âHow are you?â
A soft smile spreads across her face, âIâm not here to talk about me, I wanna apologize. I, um⊠I wanted to call but I thought Iâd do it in person.âÂ
âNo need. Iâm sorry, toâ â
But Abby isnât having it, dropping onto one knee in the middle of the complex hallway, taking your hand in hers, âOh, how I treated Thee, for I am full of regret. What do I owe Thou the pleasure of forgiveness?âÂ
You holler laughter, âBitch, is that a question? What the fuck do I say to that.âÂ
â⊠I actually donât know, what the fuckâ â
âYouâre actually the fucking worst, get up,â Youâre pulling your friend to her feet and wrapping your arms around her neck, pressing light kisses to her cheek. She lifts you and carries you inside, kicking the door shut.Â
âWas it Carol?âÂ
You barely hear your roommate from behind you. Abby sets you down, and youâre met with a⊠blank Ellie. This version of her is almost unfamiliar.Â
âHm?â
âWas,â Her eyes flicker towards your friend, âWas it Carol?â Your eyes flicker to Abby, confused as ever.Â
âUm, no, thank God, right?â You laugh awkwardly, âEllie, this is Abby. Abby, this is Ellie, my new roomie.âÂ
Abby slaps on her signature smile, extending her hand in greeting, âNice to meet you. I heard a lot.â
Ellieâs eyes flicker between Abbyâs hand and her face, eyes squinted. She only nods before murmuring to you, âPickleâs fed. Lock the door if you leave.âÂ
Your mouth drops, but before you can say anything, Ellieâs door slams shut, lock clicking, barricading herself, shut off from the outside. Pickle scurries into your open space at the noise. A stunned Abby finally drops her hand and turns to you with an expression reading I told you so. Your heart jolts and itâs painful.Â
âCâmon,â Abby coos, hands massaging your shoulders, âI owe you pancakes.âÂ
You try to smile, but it doesnât reach your eyes. Not like it should at the mention of a free meal. For some reason, you feel guilty.Â
IHOP needs to have their holiday menus all year round; These cinnamon roll pancakes are fucking lethal! You shoved your platter down and already want seconds. Abbyâs too sweet to you.Â
âAbby.âÂ
âHm?â She gnaws at her turkey bacon.Â
âIâm in a predicament.âÂ
âWhatâs the matter.âÂ
âI think I like Ellie.âÂ
Your friend pauses before sighing, âAlright. So, whatâs the plan?âÂ
âTo die, I think. Thatâs the only plan.âÂ
âDonât say that,â she chuckles. You shrug.Â
âWe made out and I liked it,â You whisper, âLike, a lot.âÂ
âDid yâall smash?â You shake your head.Â
âAre you gonna tell her?âÂ
You scoff, âDid you miss the part where I said to die? Iâd rather die. She hates my fucking guts all over again.âÂ
âI donât think she does.âÂ
âYou donât know her, Abbyâ â
âI know a jealous munch when I see one,â She smirks, âI was one for a long time.âÂ
Your jaw drops, âReally? With who?âÂ
She grins, but it doesnât meet her eyes, âDonât worry about it.âÂ
You pout. Why didnât she tell you?! Poor thing. You place a comforting hand on top of hers.
âPromise to tell me before graduation. I need some shit to look forward to.âÂ
âLike youâre gonna remember.âÂ
âFuck off! I never forget anything!âÂ
âYeah, anyway, your roomie was jealousâ â
Your shoulders drop and your eyes roll. Ellie and jealousy? Together? Bullshit. Tomfoolery. Fake news.Â
âAbby, I can't tell herâ â
âCanât or wonât?â Abby arches a brow, âYou know what you do and donât want. Youâre creating stupid rules that combat your feelings and wonder why you end up hurt. Cut it out.âÂ
⊠Either face your fears of abandonment or die alone. Interesting ultimatum. You choose the latter.Â
âYouâre very easy to read, believe it or not. You like her. Accept it or move on,â Abby mumbles around her extra-crispy hash brown.Â
You sigh. Youâve accepted it a long time ago; That's the issue. The only thing that can help you right now is more fucking cinnamon roll pancakes. Abby better leave this apology tab open.Â
Youâre hit with the usual warmth of the apartment the second you step in, finding Ellie on the couch with her feet kicked up, mindlessly fiddling with your favorite pen. Her silence makes your skin crawl; You never know what sheâs thinking.Â
âSo, what,â You shrug, setting your to-go bag on the counter, âAre you just gonna pout or are we gonna have an adult conversation?âÂ
âI donât think youâre capable of that,â She mumbles.Â
âWhat does that mean?âÂ
âIt means what it sounds like. Youâre fucking immature and inconsiderate.âÂ
Your heart nearly stops, âIâmâ â
She slices through your words, âSave that I donât know what you mean bullshit for someone else. If you and that bitch are still fucking, why the fuck did you kiss me?âÂ
Her accusation makes you snap, âFirst of all, I havenât fucked Abby in weeks! And even if I did, thatâs none of your fucking business! I can do whatever the fuck I want and I donât need to explain myself to you! And you kissed me first so donât start!âÂ
A grin grows on Ellie face, head tipping back onto the couch as she laughs to herself, sighing in disbelief, âI never thought I would regret a kiss so much in my fucking life, oh my god.âÂ
You scoff, ignoring the sudden ache in your chest, âFuck you.âÂ
âYou want to.âÂ
You hate how heat builds in your stomach, âI want to?â You snark, âYou shoved your tongue in my mouth a few hours ago. You want to. Donât fucking piss me off.âÂ
You stomp to your room before Ellie can say anything above her laughter. Your door slams and you pace across your small room. You ignore the stress building deep in your joints; The term is almost over. You donât need this fucking bullshit on your back right now!Â
To think you and Ellie were starting to get on good terms. If she wants to play that game, then fine; Youâve mastered the sport at this point! The kiss meant nothing to you either!
You hope her Christmas is fucking awful and she finds nothing but a pile of fucking rocks in her marijuana sock. What a cuntâ
Meow! Meow!
Your heart pulls at the small scratches at your door. You need your baby to give you some love since a certain someone wonât. Pickle calls out until you open the door, but your sad smile disappears at the sight of that someone propped against your door frame.Â
âShe wanted her mommy.â Ellie nods down at the kitten rubbing against your leg.Â
âFuck you.â You spit.Â
âFuck you.âÂ
âFuck you!â You shout and lean closer, but she doesnât seem threatened. That same sparkle in her eye is back, and, suddenly, your bodyâs flaming for another reason. The tip of her nose twitches, once, twice, three times, and you refuse to hold back any longer.Â
You grab her face and kiss her. Kiss her as hard as you can. Sheâs so fucking aggravating; Why canât she ever mind her fucking business? Youâre sick of her clocking your pussy! The kiss is hot and quick and it sends vibrations down to your toes. Itâs not until gentle purring fills your ears that you gasp and separate from your roommate.Â
You bend down to pick up your little princess. Ellieâs lips reconnect with your neck the second you're upright. âDid she eat?â You mutter.Â
âMhm. Twice.â You nod and kiss her small, furry head, âSheâs gonna be scratching at the door.â You ponder to yourself.Â
âWeâll make it quick,â She mumbles in between harsh sucks to your throat, nibbles at your lobe. You escape the attention for a split second to grab Pickleâs small toy mouse from your dresser, tossing it down the hall and into the living room. Her small paws skip across the floor as she slides the trinket all over the hardwood.Â
âWeâre not fucking.â You say harsher than necessary.Â
âI didnât ask.â
You gently shut the door and jump Ellieâs bones, releasing all your pent-up frustration and anger into another kiss. The formerly gentle tugs of her hair are replaced with harsh yanks that expose her throat. Seconds pass and sheâs pushing you onto your unmade bed, body bouncing before she climbs on top of you, reconnecting your mouths in the sloppiest kiss youâve ever shared⊠Itâs doing something to your cooter, though. Youâre wet as fuck.Â
Ellieâs fully onto top of you, body almost overheating from the layers of clothes between you. Her hips are sharp when they push into yours, swallowing all your stunned gasps and pleasured sighs. Your body is on fire and itâs making you lightheaded, but she feels so good on top.Â
Ellieâs cursing against your mouth and she bucks into you, right against the muscle of your thigh, and you just watch the flames spread in her orbs. Not the comforting greenery that you could get lost in for days. The trees are black and surrounded by clustered rubble. Sheâs grunting against your cheek, her nose hitting yours with every thrust.Â
A bold hand creeps between both your bodies and slips right into her wrinkly sweats, beneath her underwear, fingers drenched in seconds. You smirk when she whimpers your name between swears, palming the bud that throbs like a beating heart. Blush tints her cheeks the wetter she gets, pooling in your hand as you grind into her clit.Â
Ellieâs cute. Youâll give her that. So, you rub her harder.Â
âAgh, fuck, fuckâ â
You're snickering to yourself but Ellie doesnât care. Sheâs whining like a little bitch and humping you like a dogâŠÂ
Does she top? You should ask her after this. Post-nut gay quiz.Â
âFinger me, put yourâ oh shitâ â
âHmmâŠâ You suck your teeth, âNah.âÂ
She glares down at you, leaving fiery holes in your cheek, âDonât fâfucking piss me off right now.âÂ
You halt all your movements. âThatâs all youâve been doing since you got in this bitch. Shut the fuck up and take what I give youâŠâ You pause, âOr get the fuck off me. Your choice.âÂ
A full one-eighty, truly. How she goes from looking at you with intent to kill to a wounded puppy in seconds. Poor thing wants a treat. Your entire hand is drenched in her juices; She can wait a little longer.Â
âYou ate my fucking Doritos.âÂ
âWâWhat?â She sounds like sheâs going to cry. You canât stop smiling.Â
Slow circles on her clit, and her body wracks on top of you, âThe ones I hid in the cabinet⊠Nasty little thief. Gonna buy me some more?âÂ
Her breathing is so rapid, âYouâre so sâstupid fuckâ âÂ
âYouâre gonna do more than that⊠gonna show me whatâs in that fucking portfolio like you promised.â You whisper, hot against her face.Â
This is the strangest dirty talk youâve ever partaken in, but Ellieâs losing it on top of you. She hasnât shut up yet. Sheâs hiding her face in your neck, words vibrating against your skin. You donât know what she said, so you stop again. She sobs.Â
You sound sweeter than candy, âWhat was that?âÂ
Ellie doesnât answer. Just pants into your skin. You pat her clit a few times and she jerks to attention. âI asked you a question.âÂ
âFeels,â She heaves, âFeels so fucking goodâ â
âI didnât ask you that.â
âIâll show you â fuck, okay? Okay, okay, mâso closeâ â
Your thumb brushes against her clit, âI wanna see it after you nut.âÂ
She gasps words miles per minute, âI promise, Ipromise, touch me keep touching meâ â
Ellie attempts to grind into your hand once more, but you stretch, slippery fingers sliding lower until the tip of your index catches onto her pulsing hole. You can barely hear, but sheâs begging. Thank God you trimmed your nails.Â
You push in gently, Ellieâs teeth grazing the skin right underneath your ear. A shiver runs down your spine. She grins before biting down on it. You moan into the boiling air. Your finger gets swallowed by her walls; Sheâs so fucking tight and soft and sheâs clenching with every moan, your thighs squeezing around her hips.Â
Ellie continues to grind on top of you, practically riding your finger, her moans increasing in volume.Â
âE-Ellie, look at me, sit upââ She doesnât hesitate, clammy forehead resting on yours as you stare into her glossy, lustful eyes. Theyâre fluttering with every deep grind of your arched digit and your heart skips a beat.Â
âGimme one more, stretch me out,â she exhales onto your lips
âSure?â You breathe.Â
She groans, âYeah, fuck, mâgonna cum when you doâ â
âYou gotta cute face,â you whisper and giggle when her eyes squeeze shut in embarrassment, middle finger popping past the small entranceÂ
âFuck, babe, sâright thereâ â
Your walls clench at the name. Now youâre whining, âGimme it. Hurry up so I can play with my kid.âÂ
âO-Our fucking kidââ She chokes.Â
You hum playfully, âOddly domestic. Is this what marriage is like? Quickies in the laundry room when the babyâs watching Cocomelon?âÂ
âNo â fuck, do you ever shut the fuck up?â You canât even move from hard her walls are choking you, âMâcumming, Jesus fuckingâ son of aâ â
Ellieâs walls grip your fingers as she trembles on top of you, lips crashing onto yours as she groans in your mouth, and you smile. You shouldâve spit on her tongue, but you held back. Sheâs not ready. Fucking gremlin.Â
Her orgasm rocks her into exhaustion, her body going completely limp on top of you as her hips twitch into your touch. You stare up at the ceiling, mind racing.Â
You technically didnât fuck! Your pussy is quite convincing. You didnât, but you want to!Â
âWe didnât fuck.â You mumble.Â
She huffs dryly, voice low. Here comes the goosebumps! âSure.âÂ
âWe didnât,â you bemoan and pull out, slick smearing on both your clothes before you present the wet digits in front of your face. Ellie finally lifts her head to join the inspection of your drenched, wrinkly fingers. She smells good.Â
âGo wash your hands,â she croaks.Â
âMind your business.â You suck them clean and she snorts, rolling off and onto the bed. You sit up to open the door for Pick-Pick, but Ellie grabs your bicep.Â
âWhat?âÂ
âYou⊠You donât want toâŠ?âÂ
You look around blankly.Â
âDo you want me to do something⊠like an exchange?âÂ
Youâre not sure how to answer, but thankfully, curious meows and light scratching distract the both of you. Youâre moving like a robot into the living room, Ellie right on your tail, cooing at the baby who rubs all over her.Â
You take a seat on the⊠lavender-scented cushion. She bought a new freshener.Â
âEllie.âÂ
âWhat.âÂ
âI donât like you.âÂ
A scoff from her, âI donât care.âÂ
You pause. â⊠Wanna sniff my punani?â You mock.Â
She takes a seat, swiftly followed by Pickle, and turns her head in your direction, lip between her teeth, âCan I?âÂ
âWhat.âÂ
âJust a whiff.â She hums between snickers. The sensors in your brain are on fire. Ellie is so confusing.Â
You scratch your ear, stealing her habit, âYou⊠You want to?âÂ
She grabs your discarded pen from the coffee table, âYou want me to?âÂ
Yes. âNo.âÂ
Ellie nods and continues to fiddle with it, obnoxiously clicking it over and over. She doesnât fight you on it. How embarrassing. You really need head.Â
Your eyes meet your sock-covered feet, â⊠I was just kidding,â You mumble.Â
More pen clicking. âCome here for a second.â Your feet carry you at her grumble, plopping down onto the lavender-scented cushion. New freshener.Â
âIs this gonna be⊠a regular thing?âÂ
Your head shakes a ton. It most definitely will not. You canât take your eyes off how Ellie flips her pen. Her hands are bewitching. You need them in your throat again.Â
âI think we⊠just needed to get it out of our system?â You suggest. Unfortunately, it seems neither of you are convinced.Â
Pickle climbs up your sweatshirt, head rubbing against your chin. You peck her nose, âWhy do you think that.â Ellie asks.Â
âIâm not fucking someone I live with.â Your words are blunt, but Ellie doesnât seem shaken by them.Â
âWhy.âÂ
âBecause.â You say with finality.Â
She sighs, âBecause youâre scared of getting your feelings hurt by someone you care about again?âÂ
The bomb she drops is unexpected, but causes even more damage. Your shoulders immediately tense, on guard, âWhat the fuckâŠâ How did sheâŠ
Ellie winces, âDonât uh⊠donât be madâŠâÂ
âWhy the fuckâ how do you even know that?âÂ
âDina told me.â She blurts and you jump from your seat, glowering at the girl who sheepishly taps her fingers on the couch.Â
âThe fuck do you mean Dina told youâ â
More word-vomit. How long was she holding this shit from you? âS-She was my roommate. Sheâs the reason I got evictedâ â
Your throat is closing, ââŠIs this a fucking joke?â
Ellie cowers at your tone, âNot really.âÂ
âWhen the fuck were you going to tell me that youâre friends with my fucking ex?!â
âWeâre not friends!â She says meekly. âAnd you werenât officialâ â
âIt doesnât fucking matter, Ellie! What the fuck!â Your efforts of holding tears back fail, as usual. Youâre sick of crying in front of this broad. âShe fuâfucking ruined my life!â The stares you get will never fail to make you sick.Â
Ellieâs eyes remind you of glass. Breakable. You holler through sniffles, âIs that why you called me a fucking slut! Because that bitch told you some fake ass, fucked-up story about me whoring around campus?!âÂ
âDude, Iâmâ â
âI fucked over the sweetest fucking girl on campus, right? The worldâs best fucking pitcher got her heart broken by some low-life fucking artist with no future!â You rant until your breath is short, âI was fucking in love with her! I-I wanted to be with her, I wouldâve died for her! Iâmâ â
Your hands desperately grasp at your chest to get your heart to ease the knocking against your ribcage.Â
âYou think I-Iâm fucking easy, right? Thatâs why you came onto me earlier? âCuz Iâm a fucking whore?! A desperate slâslut with no self-worthâ â
The space you found comfort in is rapidly filling with darkness; Youâre being sucked into a void of nothing and you canât think. Ellie doesnât move, just stares over you with feeble pupils, hand clutched around that pen, the end of it leaving an indent in her sweats.Â
Pickle plops down onto your feet as you cry. You take her into your arms and hold her as close as possible, scurrying into your room. You fall back against the door and it slams, sliding down the wood as Kit-Kat nuzzles your chin. Sheâs the sweetest fucking thing in the world. How could such an angel be left in the snow to die?Â
Time moves in a blur as you weep. Your mom wouldâve held you if she were here.Â
What you would give for some parental guidance. You almost called your father.Â
Almost.Â
Click, click, click, click, clickâ
One, two, three, four. Breathe in, Breathe out. Five, sixâ
Thank God for your fucking custom pen. The noise is enough to distract her from breaking down in your tiny living room. She shouldâve snagged Pickle before you did; She needs a fucking hug.Â
Ellie hates being yelled at. More than anything. More than you. God, she fucking despises you.Â
You look and sound nothing like her mother, but youâre oddly alike. She pondered whether or not that was the reason she was drawn to you; She always finds herself trapped in spaces with fucking deflectors.Â
She hasnât even begun editing the photos from earlier. At this point, she doesnât even want to use them. Itâs a shame your eyes are so expressive; She wouldâve burned the pictures she took of you the second you left with that bitch if she wasnât so crunched for time. She needs to submit them so she can get the fuck out of here.Â
Youâd be an excellent actress; You have emotions down pact on camera. The dark part of her brain convinced her that you were thinking of her with that doting, yearnful look in your eye.Â
The photography company keeps sending her emails about completing her work profile and her fucking portfolio submission. Thatâs the only form of motivation she has left, and even then, she hasnât revisited those photos. She doesnât have much time to make them perfect.Â
Ellie swallows the lump in her throat over and over, thumb pressing down, down, down. She canât stop clicking your fucking pen. Just donât cry.Â
Your sobs almost get her there, almost push her over the edge, but she shuts her eyes and counts each click, matching them with every heave she releases. You, somehow, sound just like her fucking mom.Â
And Ellie, despite the backwards relationship between the two of you, still fucking kissed you. She shouldâve died right there in front of you. What a fucking joke.Â
But she couldnât stop. She didnât want to. Sheâs never experienced affection like that; It was passionate and made her itch with a desire she hasnât felt in a long time. All she wants is for someone to love her, hold her like you did, touch her like you did. Sheâs never felt that euphoric in her life, never witnessed so many bright colors at once.Â
Whoever told her being alone was easy was a fucking liar. No one should wake up and want to die every day, so why does she? Everyone thinks she prefers silence, but she doesnât. Ellie craves contact in all forms. In any form. Desperately.Â
Why did it have to be you? Why the fuck did it have to be you.Â
Her brain is telling her she canât wait to move out, so why is her heart amidst decay whenever she thinks about it? Sheâs going to suffocate in here, so she rises, pen still in hand, and snags her puffer and beanie from the couch. Her feet shove into her boots and sheâs out, the front door slamming shut. She didnât even bother to lock it.Â
Ellie takes the stairs and leaves the building on autopilot, no destination in mind. Just stomping through the splintering cold like a fucking yeti. Every breath oxidizes in a cloud before her as she recalls where she fumbled with you.Â
Dina.Â
Ellieâs cold hands frost her face as she wipes it, making sharp turns and stumbling on ice. She wants to go home; She misses her dad.Â
Dina seems to be the only thing you two have in common. You both might hate her more than each other. The horror she felt when her ex-roommate taped that eviction notice on her door is incomparable. Ellie was a struggling entrepreneur and practically fucking homeless overnight. All because Dinaâs new fucking side piece.Â
Ellie and Dina, friends. Wait until she tells you about how she almost beat her and her girlfriendâs ass. If youâre even willing to listen at this point.Â
Ellie continues to walk, hands tucked under her armpits. At least sheâs not simmering anymore in her rage anymore. She blocks down the way when she realizes she forgot her fucking phone. This wouldâve been a perfect time to cry to her old man.Â
Youâre not out of Ellieâs system at all. Youâve, unfortunately, claimed residency inside of her.Â
Youâre scribbling with spilled wine on your shirt, outside noise muffled by the plugs in your ears. You don't recall leaving your room, grabbing a bottle and downing its contents, but the remnants of broken glass acts as a decent reminder.Â
Your hand is cramping from its grip on a new pen, but you canât stop gliding the tip across the sixth sheet of printer paper. You hate what youâre drawing; The details are perfect, inked scratches practically muscle memory, and you despise it. Itâs always her.
Youâre going to be alone for a very long time. Youâre too destructive for companionship, youâve learned. How ironic: the one aspect of life you crave is becoming your demise, and your downfall is going to be tortuous. Recovery is never long lasting for you.Â
So, you sketch. And scratch. And erase, start again, hoping, praying, for an outcome that doesnât feel so lost. Youâre destroyed and desperate to find comfort. Was your father right when he called you sick at age twelve? Maybe something is truly wrong with you. Maybe one of the reasons why you constantly push and mask and hide.Â
Every insecurity youâve garnered in high school is flourishing in adulthood, thick as vines and as strong as tree bark. Deflection is an art that youâve mastered out of preservation; Too bad itâs trapped you in isolation.Â
The green in Ellieâs eyes holds stories. Somehow, this month feels like centuries. Centuries of studying the mass area of blossoming, healthy land beneath her pupils. Her eyes are sacred, almost too sacred to manipulate, but you draw them anyway.Â
You want to touch her again. You want her to touch you. Just one last time. Youâre already a fucking failure; One last mistake wouldnât hurt.Â
A teardrop musses the paper, so you scrap it like the others and start again. Ellieâs eyes are too pretty to be smudged.Â
You canât stay here anymore. You hope Amaya understands. You hope Ellie understands.Â
Youâd give anything to be able to call your mother.Â
You hear the front door open and close for the hundredth time tonight, followed by swift clicks of a pen. Guilt floods your system. You peer at a sleeping Pickle on your mattress before standing, opening your door to see Ellie entering hers. Your intoxicated brain notes the sex lighting in her room; Red LED. You talk before thinking.Â
âI didnât mean to yell at you.â She jumps and turns at your cracked voice, eyes red. She smoked; you can smell it. âIâm sorry. I didnât mean toâ â
âIâm submitting my portfolio in the morning. Iâll be out by Christmas.â She says, monotone. Lifeless.Â
A dry huff escapes your closed throat. Your heart is breaking. Just a little, âI guess, uh⊠I canât see it anymore, huh?â She doesnât answer.Â
âDo you regret taking those pictures?â She mumbles.
You don't hesitate, âNot at all.â
She nods. The silence that follows is thick, weighing at both of your shoulders, holding you in place. Ellieâs breathing is finally steady, and itâs calming.Â
âGo to bed.â She whispers before entering her room, gently shutting it behind her. Some tears fall before you follow her lead.Â
Pickle is sitting on the edge of your bed, just watching you. You smile sadly and whisper, âAt least you love me, right?âÂ
A gentle blink from her. You sob; Another pair of green eyes to bring you comfort.Â
âI love you, too.âÂ
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a friend in need! (e.w.)
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SYNOPSIS: heartbreak aid during the apocalypse, you ask?Â
WORD COUNT: 5k
WARNINGS: bff!ellie whoâs sad, kinda perv oc whoâs eager to fix that, remixed version of seattle!ellie, dina catching strays for no reason (i love her pls), wound care but erotic, SMUT AGELESS BLOGS/MINORS DNI, dubcon (nasty green), porn watching, mutual/guided masturbation, brief poochie eating, oc in denial ab her little crush, real girlhood <3, slight angst :(
A/N: the bubblegum apocalypse where no one dies or lies. #SCISSORING
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The gates of Jackson open, and relief rushes through your chest.Â
Everyone is accounted for. Ellieâs accounted for.Â
Weeksâor however the fuck longâ of pent-up anxiety finally settles in your limbs as you sprint towards Shimmer while Jesse tends to Dina, greeting the hazel mount with coos and rustles through her fur. Baby needs a bath and a good brushing.Â
Your eyes swiftly shift from her to your best friend, âEllie, Iâm so gladâ â
âCan you help me down, please?âÂ
Creases bunch in your forehead at the strain in her tone. And then youâre met with the blood-soaked wrap that's enclosed around her jean-covered thigh.Â
âOh, shit⊠câmere.âÂ
Ellieâs good leg swings over the saddle, and you hold her waist to ease her down into the muddy grass. Joelâs the first one to engulf her. They exchange words that you donât catch before his reluctant arms drop to guide Shimmer back to the stocks, leaving you two alone. You canât stop yourself from throwing your arms around her neck next, mindful of her leg.Â
âI didnât know what to think when yâall didnât come back,â you whisper.Â
When the two girls first made their departure to Seattle, the icy remains of winter had just begun to melt into the dirt beneath it, and that alone felt like ages ago. Thereâs mosquitoes and moths everywhere now, following wherever the sun beams.Â
A strong arm wraps around your waist, and you instantly stiffen and detach from her, hands resting on her shoulders.Â
Her gaze drops to the ground when you whisper, âWhat happened, Ellie? You okay?â
She breathes. âPeachy.âÂ
Your hands drop when she turns in the direction of her home, head jerking when she says, âIâm gonna shower.âÂ
âDinners supposed to be really good tonight!â You exclaim with a broken smile when she takes her first hobble, âEat with me? Consider it a celebration that you made it home safe.âÂ
Ellie seems to soften at your invitation, head bobbing in approval, and you smile.Â
She holds her fist out to you, âSee you in 20?âÂ
You bump your knuckles against hers with strained cheeks, âSee you in 20.âÂ
One small, comforting smile from her, and sheâs off, limping back home.Â
âWhatâs up with them?âÂ
You flinch at the too close whisper from Jesse, and you shrug. âMaybe they broke up.âÂ
âDoubt it,â He snorts, âDina told me it was brutal on the way back. The bastards were everywhere, she said. Theyâre probably still shook up.âÂ
âDamn⊠Howâs she doing?âÂ
âWeird as hell. I think sheâs sick or something,â Concern is melting off him, âSheâs getting checked out now.â
âIâll check on her later,â You face him, âComing to dinner?âÂ
âProbably not. Gotta make sure Deeâs good.â Heâs already walking off, trailing after his friendâŠ? Ex? You never know what to call them.Â
âSee ya.â You wave awkwardly.Â
Weird.Â
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How do you cheer up a friend that just witnessed three dozen infected tear another small community to shreds? At least, according to Jesse. He was able to get more out of Ellie and Dina than you were, apparently.Â
You donât know how Ellie â or anyone â could experience such barbarous scenes as frequently as they do. Youâve been on patrol twice since you stumbled upon Jackson a few years back, and each venture leaves you less and less eager to see the world beyond its walls. You respect their bravery, not only for being able to dive head first into unknown territory with nothing but bullets and faith, but to also face those walking demons at every corner.Â
Your closest friend is often excited to show you scavenged artifacts that she has collected, but⊠sheâs barely spoken to you since you helped her off Shimmer.Â
Her silence is uncommon, and therefore, frightening.Â
âItâs been a while since weâve had fish,â you scoff weakly, poking your carrots with your fork, âItâs good, huh?âÂ
Her focus shifts from the tablecloth to you.Â
Silence.Â
You drop your utensil, âFuck, Ellie⊠dude, what happened out there? Jesse told me⊠that y'all got caught upâ â
âDinaâs pregnant.âÂ
He didnât tell you that.
Ellieâs whisper breezes past your ears so fast that you barely catch it. The canteen continues to bustle with hungry, ravaged patrons who returned from their second round of patrol. You assumed Ellie was one of them after her scattered return, but she hasnât touched anything on her plate. Not even her carrots. Her favorite; A literal goddamn rabbit.Â
No wonder she hasnât eaten⊠Who couldâve with news like that? Especially considering the high she was riding before the couple left.Â
âWhat.âÂ
Ellieâs head shakes with gall, and a disappointed grin plumps her cheeks.Â
âYup⊠Canât wait to tell Maria.âÂ
Sharing the news of a new Jackson kiddo sounds like the last thing on her mind. Days before the two took off, she was squealing like a wild hyena in the wee hours of the night, gushing to you about the midnight explorations with her long-term crush. Her retellings of their first night together were vivid: filled with pent up tension and need and unfiltered lust. According to Ellie, they couldâve gotten married in a fortnight with the relationship theyâd built over the years, and you believed her. Sadly.Â
You were present, observant, during your teenage years. You were there when Cat kissed Ellie, when they broke up, when Ellie had recurring nightmares about Riley and was desperate for comfort from you, when Ellie fell for DinaâŠÂ
And now theyâre in a pickle. A fat one.Â
Hearing about Ellieâs relationship never went how youâd assume. You expected to be happy for your friend whenever she enthused about a topic that brought about such elation, but there was always something about the stories that gave you pause. Something that burned in the pit of your stomach and caused you to, frankly, fake congratulations. Youâre unsure why, but hearing about Dina and Ellieâs relationship potentially being tarnished is calming that simmer inside you.
âJust when I thoughtâŠâ She scoffs quietly. âWhatever. Fuck it.âÂ
You canât resist and slip, â⊠Whoâs the daddy?â And she hisses.
âGuess.âÂ
But you donât have to... Fuck.Â
Dina and Jesseâs relationship was⊠something. In adolescence, Ellie was either secretly celebrating their multitude of separations or crying to you about them getting back together. Their consistent streak of being on and off clearly got the best of them. Thereâs a ball of cells growing inside of your friendâs almost-girlfriend.Â
âShit⊠maybe it was⊠a misunderstanding? Doesnât it take a couple weeks to⊠form in the womb or whatever?âÂ
Youâre not the devil's advocate. Your lips clamp at Ellieâs stern glare.
âThereâs no misunderstanding.âÂ
Your shoulders slump at the distance in her eyes. The indifference sheâs exuding canât disguise the hurt that sheâs experiencing internally. Your heart aches for her, despite the excited jitters in your fingers.
â⊠Sorry, man.âÂ
âI donât care.âÂ
Good, you impulsively want to say. You shove it down into the hardwood beneath your soles. Your brows furrow in annoyance, more so at yourself for not being remorseful. âFuck off. Yes, you do, and thatâs okay. Itâs normal.âÂ
âCan we go?âÂ
Her request is sudden and cracked, and every inkling of pride deflates in your chest. Poor thing; How could you feel like this when sheâs this scattered? Guilt replaces whatever dark fantasy youâve conjured up in the past five minutes.Â
You move to stand without objection. Fuck the carrots, âYeah. Letâs rollâ â
An instant lightbulb above your head⊠and itâs glowing green. Roll.
Roll!
Mischief shines in your chest and eyes when you glance around the packed space in search for,Â
âTOMMY!âÂ
A flash of brown hair turns to meet your sprinting form. The peach heâs holding looks devine.Â
âYou seen âGene anywhere?âÂ
Your grin widens at his disapproving stare.
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âBe careful with those, shit-for-brain! Iâm not coming to save your ass like last time!âÂ
âGot it, boss!â You squeak with a polite smile, shoving the small baggie of rolled joints into your stuffed satchel. It vanishes the second Eugene slams his vault to his dirty ass man cave, âFucking dicksucker.â You huff.
Ellie snickers from beside you. âCâmon. Be nice.âÂ
âNo. He skimped on me last time. Toke hog.âÂ
The walk to your place is colder than usual, but itâs beautiful out. The moon shines from behind the dark clouds, illuminating the ivory that shields the incoming spring grass. Gorgeously cinematic; A scenery that gets the heart thumping. Aching. Yearning.Â
You lead Ellie onto your porch and into your home. She removes her jacket and kicks off her boots, throwing her armor over the designated rack. Your satchel goes flying across the room until it clatters on your bed. Black tapes spill all over the mattress, and Ellie scolds you disapprovingly.Â
âAgain? Really?â
You smirk. Eugeneâs always too blasted to punish your kleptocracy, âNo one has a better porn collection than âGeâ â
Her jaw slacks, âPorn?! What the fuck, I thought those were the Jurassic Parkâ â
âTheyâre notâŠâ Before pondering, âAlthough thatâd be some crazy role play. RAAAWRâ â
âYouâre the fucking worst.âÂ
âCâmon! Look at these titles,â You skip to your bedside to snag a couple tapes, âSmoochie the Coochie⊠Banging my hot neighborâŠâÂ
A boisterous laugh passes your lips, âThrobbinâ Hood: Prince of Beaves! Tell me thatâs not fucking hilarious!âÂ
Ellie doesnât laugh. Hasnât laughed. Just simmers by the front door with red dusting her cheeks. How adorable!Â
âWhyâre you looking like that?âÂ
When her eyes travel over the creases between your brows and confused smile, your feet give an awkward stutter. This wasnât the reaction you were expecting. At the very least, she shouldâve cracked a smile by now. Even an insecure one.Â
You peer down at the tapes in your hand and back up at her. Her posture shifted: arms wrapped protectively around her waist while she leaned on the balls of her feet, eyes inspecting the dim lights of your space.Â
Another lightbulb. Not a green one.Â
âHave you ever watched porn?âÂ
She shrugs with floundering shoulders. You chuckle.Â
âItâs just for shits and giggles, Ellie. Donât be so serious. The acting sucks and you needa good laugh.âÂ
You cradle the filled baggie like it holds a sacred orb and waltz towards the VCR. Your screen shifts from bright blue to the tapeâs introduction screen. Naked men in speedos⊠Ellie plops down on the couch behind and mindlessly flicks a lighter. You reach into the baggie and toss her the fattest joint available before working the remote.Â
A sigh releases⊠then another flicker⊠then a long, drawled out exhale. You grin.Â
You, remote in hand, plop down next to her, âIs it good?â
âBetter than last time, for sure.â You trade the remote for the joint, arm wrapped around your angled legs as you pull. Hits smooth⊠er. It still dries your throat.Â
âRemind me to thank him.âÂ
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Two joints down. Two tapes completed. Three wide smiles from Ellie from the bad acting. The nightâs a win in your book.Â
She lazily lights another joint while you switch out the tapes. You purposely saved the best for last: apparently the only lesbian porno in that bastardâs whole cave. Whenâs the last time youâve smoochied a coochie?
More importantly, whenâs the last time Ellie has? Recently, you assume; She and Dina were too close to only be going on long walks in the woods. The more you smoke, the more your mind wanders where it shouldnât.Â
⊠Your friend is a lover. Always has been, despite her efforts of convincing you, herself â everyone â that sheâs emotionally indifferent. Craves affection, both verbal and physical, like sheâs deprived. She raves to you about her desires on a weekly basis, for fucks sake! Someone hug the poor girl!Â
âFeeling better?â You squeak when you plant on the cushion. Ellie nods with a soft grin.Â
âThank you.âÂ
Your hands clap together and her body shakes from the recoil. âThe nightâs not over yet! I got a surprise for you! Happy Birthday!âÂ
âItâs not my birthday⊠I donât know my birthdayâ â
Your smile is laced with grating sarcasm, âWow, you really know how to kill the vibe! Just play along, goddamn!âÂ
You sigh when her expression flattens.Â
âEllieâŠâ
âYes?âÂ
Oh⊠That crackly tone did a little something. Cheering Clitorous. Alright. Okay.Â
âI found a little something in âGeneâs special drawerâ â
âArenât all his drawers special.âÂ
âArenât you supposed to be shutting the fuck up.âÂ
Her red eyes widen, but she silences.Â
âYou know what feels really nice after a bad breakup?âÂ
Her middle finger digs into her dry eye, âGetting high and watching porn with the only other lesbian you know?âÂ
âEven better,â Your hand claps down on her jean-clad, uninjured thigh. âGetting high and watching lesbian porn with the only other lesbian you know⊠while getting head. A true fixer-upper.â
More silence, and your tummy gives a nervous tumble. Eugeneâs bud gives you enough courage to make eye contact, and, given any other circumstance, you wouldâve hollered laughter at how stunned Ellie looks, eyes nearly stretched beyond her lids, but you donât. You press on when she denies you.Â
âYouâre lying.âÂ
âAm I?â Your thumb presses the large button in the middle and the screen displays two, three â six women⊠all sprawled out on white carpet while lewdness shines through their eyes⊠And not at all the romantic wives fingering each other next to the fireplace like you envisioned. Plus, the music sucks. Who the fuck plays the accordion while bumping cooters?
Your eyes circle around and⊠Oh, wow. A lot less tame than you were expecting⊠Are those chains and a paddle?Â
What the fuck, Eugene.Â
âOh, shit.âÂ
Ellieâs either impressed or about to go on a judgmental rampage. You gauge her expression curiously. Her lashes keep fluttering like butterfly wings. You nearly coo audibly. She always does that when sheâs excited! What a cutie!Â
Ellie recites the description at the bottom of the screen, âWhen six girls go off into the woods for an early 4th of July getaway, conversations take a lustful⊠and explorative turn. Find out what happens during one late, hot evening after a game of⊠kiss and blow?âÂ
You snort, âAre you asking me?âÂ
âWell, yeah⊠The fuck is kiss and blow?âÂ
You shrug, âFind out.â
One click of the remote, and the footage begins⊠More giggles from Ellie, and something flutters in your chest. Youâll have to watch bad acting with her more often.Â
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Six minutes into Smoochie the Coochie, and you still donât know what kiss and blow is. And you donât care to find out.Â
High pitched moans and pleasured squeals that almost sound phony rings in your hazy skull as you stare up at your best friend from between her covered legs.Â
This is the quietest sheâs been all night: her eyes are locked on the screen behind you, completely entranced with flushed cheeks by what you assume is the sweatiest, raunchiest⊠scissoring, is what itâs called? On the screen. Maybe. Youâre wired and canât think straight and Ellieâs hot.Â
âAre we really doing this right now?âÂ
She whispers when you caress her thigh over her pants, and you nod approvingly. Desperately, but she canât tell. âUp to you.âÂ
You donât expect a cold hand to come up and tenderly brush against your cheek. You shudder and nuzzle into it. Sober you would be so embarrassed at how youâre reacting to her affections. Youâve never been the needy one.Â
âCan weâŠâÂ
You pout and burn with embarrassment, but start to pull back, âStop?âÂ
âNo, noâŠâ Her eyes meet yours and your body locks. A bit nervous. âI dunnoâŠâÂ
âTell me.âÂ
âLater.â She whispers.Â
You stare skeptically as she plays with your earlobe. âI promise Iâm good. I want this. Iâll tell you later.âÂ
A pause before you sigh. âOkay. Up.â You pat her thigh and her hips rise. Her unbuttoned jeans are peeled down her legs, gently over her fresh bandage, and tossed beside you. Your body is miles ahead of your brain; before you realize, your lips smack all over her bruised thighs, peppering over the freshly bandaged scars and faded ones. She squirms where she sits, shaky breaths puffing from her lips.Â
Your mouth travels higher, and an encouraging hand lands on the back of your head, massaging your scalp.Â
âTell me whatâs happening.â You mumble against her, a blind finger pointing back at the screen.Â
âI donât â So much shit is going on. Like⊠from all directions.â Â
You smile against her thigh, âSomeone catch your attention?âÂ
âIâŠâÂ
But no explanation is needed. Thereâs treads of weakness in her growl. Go figure.Â
âLemme guess⊠She look like her?âÂ
If she catches the unwarranted agitation in your tone, she doesnât mention it. Simply digs her nails into the back of your head. No forceful tugs at your hair, but a warning, and your teeth beam.Â
âI dunno what the fuck youâre smiling for, but itâs gonna piss me off soon.â
There's a smidge of threat in her voice, so your kisses travel up. A pleasant distraction, given every small twitch of her legs.Â
Not too long before you reach the hem of her underwear, and you trap it between your teeth before releasing it. Her tummy jolts when the fabric hits her skin, and you go heart-eyed.Â
âTell me who youâre looking at.âÂ
âT-The one that brought all that crazy shit to the party.âÂ
Of course. Handcuffs, she means. The large, wooden paddle, she means. A slow drag of your tongue advances up her v-line and her body wracks against her will.Â
âCrazy in a bad way?â You purr against softness, and she exhales a laugh. âNot in this context, I guess.âÂ
âYou like that kinda stuff?âÂ
âHow the fuck would I know?âÂ
You snort before your eyes fall, trapped by the small patch of wetness that sticks to her panties. Glues the outline of her lips to the fabric. Youâre seconds â inches away from going feral.Â
Whatever patience you entered with has withered: and with determined hands, Ellieâs underwear gets yanked, pried down her legs and tossed behind you. Your eyes glisten with excitement when they meet the red pearl that twitches in anticipation, walls that leak when the warmth of your breath brushes over the cup of her.Â
Her pussyâs perfect. A stunner, for sure. You and Cat were never close, but youâd hit her up to get Ellie tatted. Not even in a discreet place. Itâd be somewhere where everyone â Dina â can see. On your forehead, for fucks sakeâ
S-Stop staring at me.Â
It seemed like the moans behind you became louder. You nearly shove three fingers in Ellieâs mouth as punishment for interrupting the moment, but you choke on a breath. Mumble a slur of youâre cute, canât help it in an attempt to ease her.Â
And just when your tongue unravels over your bottom lip, right when Ellieâs taste is millimeters away, right when her breath hitches and her mouth drops open, the loudest crack, very reminiscent of bullets, rings across your small living room. Scares her, scares you enough to steal the attention from the art between her thighs.Â
The sight on the screen is new, even for you.Â
Itâs not every day you see girls being slung across muscly laps and swatted on the ass with wooden tools with their hands bound behind them while they cry and sob and beg for their masters to hit them harder. You probably wouldâve laughed at the theatrics if Ellie wasnât here, as if you weren't about to go to town on her ten seconds ago. Both your breaths shudder and tremble as raunchy sounds of lips smacking and girls touching themselves and fingering each other split your ears in half.Â
Your vision tunnels and shifts when a whimper from Ellie rattles through your chest and down your ribcage. She gasps like youâve caught her doing something bad, but she doesnât stop whatever sheâs doing. Just blushes madly with her hand shoved between her squeezed legs while her eyes flicker between you and the screen.Â
Time seems to whir and the room spins. The pace of your breath increases, slobbery wheezes syncing with Ellieâs when her legs cross over one another.Â
Your muscles move you closer, hands planted on either side of her waist, back enlengthening until your eyes are level with hers. Her tongue barely dips to wet her bottom lip, eyes swiftly flickering down to your mouth.
A hand raises right when another crack of a paddle against skin ripples through your speakers, and before Ellie can flinch, your palm caresses her cheek, thumb exploring the divets in her face. Over the healed wounds and fiery specks that hypnotize. You donât expect her to nuzzle into your touchâŠÂ
And you definitely donât expect her arm to start moving, despite its enclosing.Â
Her eyelids bat, and green pierces through your chest. Over your neck, your face, your shoulders as her bicep twitches. When her lips part around a gasp, you choke.Â
Lemme see.Â
Ellie curses under her breath, kisses your palm, and undoes the twining of her legs. Her fingers are gentle where they rest over her pussy, the bones in her hand flexing as her palm digs into her clit, folds smushed around the muscles of her thumb.Â
Thatâs how you do it?
Her teeth sink into her bottom lip, masking a smile as her head shakes. Your heart pinches.Â
Show me how.Â
Her head falls to the side as her cheeks sizzle.Â
You first.Â
You shudder, and your brain scolds. This wasnât the plan. You were supposed to smoke, watch porn, eat pussy, and escort her home safely.Â
Not the fucking plan.
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Ellie insisted that you restart Smoochie the Coochie before you undress. For ambiance, sheâd said when you stood on two feet, watching as she removed her hoodie. For me? Sheâd whispered against your cheek, in only a tank top, when you finally positioned yourself on the cushion in front of her. Face to face, pussies almost touching, your knees to the ceiling.Â
The volume of the footage has been turned down, but the acting⊠itâs fucking hilarious. You shouldnât be smiling. You shouldnât be giggling, but you are.Â
Ellie moves loose strands of hair behind her ear, grin matching yours.Â
âHm?âÂ
âNothing.âÂ
âHm.â
Ellie, much to your shock, makes the first move. Again.Â
Takes your wrist in her hand, brings your limp one up to her mouth to pepper kisses on your knuckles before pressing in between your open thighs. Your fingers are clumsy and your heart pounds against your ribcage, thighs jerking at the sticky contact of your own juices. Ellie's eyes between your legs like a hawk, leant comfortably against the pillows stacked behind her.Â
Her attention encourages you. You balance on the hand that rests on the couch, grinning playfully around the fingers that sink into your mouth and glide on your tongue. Ellie shakes her head with a small smile before reaching for the lighter and last joint. Sticks the end of it between her lips, flicks the lighter twice, and ignites it.Â
Every slow exhale of smoke gets rewarded with presses on your clit, your index and middle fingers tickling the sensitive area with learned precision. It pulsates under your fingertips whenever you lock eyes; her eyes are fervent with need, uncontrollably so, and it sends vibrations through your spine.Â
Slower, Ellie whispers wetly when your touch becomes rushed. Too eager for her liking. Sheâs always hated when you rush things. Loathes your impatience.Â
The moans from the film pick up again: shaky and cracked and high. They match yours when you apply just enough pressure on the spot right above your clit. Your walls constrict and slick gushes from, and Ellie curses.
When your fingers explore elsewhere, she sits up suddenly, her breath hitting your mouth when she mutters, Keep touching right there, with a tight hand around your wrist, trying to guide you back to the spot that makes your thighs quake.
Iâm gonna cum if I do. Thereâs warning in your gasp.
Ellie puffs again before huffing a smoky breath, the scent infiltrating your senses. Your fingers almost sink inside, Wasnât that the plan?Â
Cum w-with me?Â
Your voice is pleading, tone almost identical to when you would incessantly pester and follow Ellie around Jackson when you were younger.Â
Ellie, watch a movie with me?Â
Ellie, do a puzzle with me?Â
Ellie, go on a walk with me?
Ellie! Ellie! Ellie!Â
What used to be innocent invitations have swiftly shifted into something darker, and Ellie needs more. A shocked squeak leaves you when her free hand curls around the back of your neck to smash your lips together. Your hazy mind hadnât registered Ellieâs fiery stares at your bruised lips, her head tilting in the opposite direction of yours, her nose brushing against yours whenever your fingers made a gooey noise.Â
Your eyes flutter shut when her tongue sloppily glides over your bottom lip, moans quenchless where they hit Ellieâs tongue. She swallows them down until they jolt in her stomach, and shoves her hand between her thighs once more.Â
Her fingers are drenched and so are yours; thereâs nasty, slicked noises everywhere. From you, from Ellie, from the television thatâs been forgotten by both of you.Â
Ellieâs movements become desperate in a matter of seconds, no longer able to keep up the pace of your kiss. Your separated lips connect only by a thin line of saliva as Ellie gasps hit the skin of your cheek.Â
Canât wait to feel you on me.Â
Your euphoria begs to peak at Ellieâs promise, your fingers massaging all the spots that send you to the stars at a desperate pace, trying to match Ellieâs.Â
Cum with me, she growls like you did, Cum with me, cum with me, fuck â
Your friendâs name is a prayer on your tongue, shrouded in lust and a longing youâve forced down to non-existence. You both succumb to pleasure in unison, the pulsing between your thighs synched with hers as she whimpers out.Â
I wanna tie you up like that. Tie you up? Beat your ass raw and bloody? Whatever she's looking at, you want. You'll take without hassle. Anything for her. After one glance at the screen,Â
Cumming for you, oh shitâ
You wring out your high until thereâs nothing left to give her, legs closing around your wrist at the aching sensitivity. Ellieâs head falls onto the arch of your knees, lathering your skin in spit-filled kisses, her soaked hand slowing between her legs.Â
âLay down.âÂ
âH-Hm?âÂ
âLay down,â you croak.Â
And she does, eyes filled with carnality.Â
The porno is long forgotten when your head shoves between Ellieâs legs, the tape stuck on the starter screen while her cries of pleasure blend with the same bullshit accordion.Â
You tongue her with fever, drink down all of her heartbreak that she endured while she was away from the source, mark yourself all over the terrain of her until she shatters with a cry of your name. Drenches your mouth, your tongue, your chin. Pushes you away with a cautious hand when you donât stop. Flinches with sensitivity.Â
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âHold still.âÂ
You swipe the disinfecting wipe over Ellieâs wound, fresh blood leaking into the white cotton. She assembles new bandages where she sits above you, unraveling the sterile fabric for you to wrap her in.
âIâm trying!â She whines, âIt still hurts.âÂ
âShouldnât have tried to ride my faceâ â
She flicks your forehead so hard, it thumps like a drum, and you wince before playfully biting her finger.Â
She snickers and allows you to collect the last bits of blood with the last tarnished rag in your first-aid kit, snagging the bandages from her grasp. She holds down the new gauze and does as sheâs told, lifting her thigh on your command as you bind her messy stitches.Â
Why did you kiss them, though?Â
It lasted 0.5 seconds. A quick, gentle smack meant to soothe, but your brain doesnât see it that way. Red alarms glow in every crevice of your cerebrum, urging you to move away from your best friend. You stare at Ellie and Ellie stares back, expression no longer readable and easy-going, and you flinch away from her.Â
Inviting her over for some innocent porn-watching is one thing⊠but kissing her without motive? Without the need to progress into something more? It stuns you more than her. You think.
âSor â sorry â â
Ellieâs already palming at your shoulders, âItâs okay⊠itâs not a big dealâ â
And itâs not. Why does her confirmation bloom a new ache in your chest?Â
Your knees pop when you hurriedly stand, and Ellie follows, hands sliding down your arms to grab your hands.Â
âHeyâŠâ
You meet her eyes.Â
âWeâre good⊠okay? Itâs nothing serious.âÂ
Donât cry. You agree with a grin. One you pray she doesnât notice cracks in its corners. She says nothing. Just caresses your cheek in unsaid thanks. Thanks for tonight. Thanks for the distraction.Â
Ellie returns a smile before gathering her clothes off the floor. She dresses in silence as you watch with a sorrowful gleam. Is it selfish to ask her to stay? Would it be too much? Should you? Will you?
Itâs when sheâs tying her boots up that you say something.Â
âI can walk you back!âÂ
âI got it. Iâm not going straight home.âÂ
Ellieâs denial is calm. Gentle. Not abrasive in the slightest, but your hands quiver and heart swells, bound to burst with dejection. Where is she going? The town is sleeping.Â
She leaves before you can ask with a promise of seeing you in the morning for breakfast. Nothing unfamiliar, nothing changed.Â
Tears rock you to sleep, and youâre not sure why.Â
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make the bed. (e.w.)
âđđđđđœđđ đ
đđđ»đđžđ đđđđđđ đđœđ¶đ đčđđđđ'đ đ»đđđ đđŸđđ đđŸđđ, đ¶đđđđœđđ đđœđŸđđ đŒ đ»đđđžđđč đđ đ·đ đ¶ đđŸđđ.â
omggg my first writing challenge YIPPPEEEE shoutout to olivia rodrigo
ty to the post-pandemic prose and my babies @elliesbelle and @totheblood for pointers :D love yall downÂ
wc;cw: 1.1K, just angst YAAAAY, internalized homophobia, ellies so sad :(, mentions of alcohol
âlf I liked girls,â you slurred, your lips brushing against the shell of Ellieâs ear, the pounding speakers synched with the squeezes in her chest, âI swear tâgod⊠youâd be mine.âÂ
Whenever you drunkenly murmur to her like this, Ellie wishes she didnât hear you; She was shocked she could over the ruckus happening all around, rattling the bubble she created for the two of you. You always sounded so sure with your lies. They never fail to throw her into fight or flight mode. She tensed and her stomach churned in despair.Â
âYâso perfect, Ellie. Love yâso⊠fuckinâ much. All mine.âÂ
All she could do was nod and whirl you around with a pained smile before burying it into your clothed shoulder. You didnât bat an eye; You were always the affectionate drunk.Â
But she wanted to scream. To cry and beg and ask â demand that you fall into her right where you stand. To love her the way sheâs loved you since she showed you how to ride a bicycle in elementary school. She flinched at every delicate kiss you planted on her neck, her hands squeezing at your hips. She doesnât know if she wants to push or pull you closer.Â
She knows. Her arms enclosed around your waist and you giggle into her skin.Â
This is exactly how you two should be. Sheâs envisioned it since middle school: completely infatuated and engulfed in each other, secluded off in your own little world filled with nothing but solace. Closeness. Affection and desire.Â
So why was she sick to her stomach at your scent? Lavender and sage no longer brought her the comfort that they used to in adolescence. She was being torn apart from the inside out, but she couldnât scream.Â
She only listened, digested every drunk fallacy that you directed to her in secret. With no one watching. No one ever watched. No one could know. That was your only rule when she climbed through your window months prior. Please just keep it between us, youâd whispered before leaning in to kiss her.Â
At least Ellie could imagine that this was real as she held you tight: recreate the same image in her mind over and over. The two of you are together and happy to be in love with no selfishness or regrets in her mind. All she had to do was close her eyes, and you were all hers, just like you said. Sheâs so, so in love with you.Â
But you didnât want her. You never did.Â
Sheâs instantly reminded of that day a few months ago. The memory feels like a ghost over her shoulder; Maybe thatâs why sheâs constantly peeking over it, picking at it with her nails.Â
The two of you often reserved study rooms during exam season for review, but you had other plans. You were exactly where you were supposed to be â room 213 â but you werenât by yourself.Â
You â beautiful, as always â brought⊠friends. Friends that Ellie knew, that you knew, didnât like her. She never actually talked to them, but she always felt⊠off. She was instantly riddled with anxiety, the books that she checked out ten minutes ago almost hitting the floor as her arms weakened. Sweat pebbled on her forehead as she stood and watched everyone stare at her.Â
Why did it look like they were all laughing? She couldnât hear any chuckles, but there was laughter. Someoneâs laughing at her. Do they know? You have to know, but do they know about the two of you? About how Ellie feelsâ
Ellie? youâd called.Â
⊠Mhm? she recalls almost fainting.Â
Your eyes were confused; You knew something was off, and it made her even more nervous.Â
Sit down, honey. Come meet everyone. You made sure to massage her knee under the table; It always soothed her.Â
The introductions were surprisingly smooth. Ellie never expected your friends to be so polite considering how rowdy they seemed outside of class. She was pleasantly surprised and put at ease. Until the end of your study session.Â
Everyone was packing their bags and cracking jokes. Ellie even got a couple laughs out of some of them during the quiet few hours.Â
Ellie wasnât sure what came over her, but she eased closer to you, still gathering your books. She relaxed at your scent. When you turned to face her with that gentle smile, her mouth moved on autopilot.Â
I missed you so much. You never hit me back last night. Â
Maybe it was the way Ellie said it. She shouldnât have looked into your eyes the way she did, whispered to you like that, said she missed you with so much devotion. But she did, and she wished she didnât.Â
Your smile turned to worry instantaneously, and Ellieâs heart plummeted when your head whipped around the room to check if anyone heard before turning back to her. No one cared.Â
Ellie felt like sheâd been stabbed. It happened so quickly; she probably wouldâve missed it if she blinked. Her nails dug into the hardcover of her books, tears jerking in her eyes before she tossed a stiff see you guys later over her shoulder and rushed out the room. You tried to grab her arm, but she shoved you off. She had to fight her instincts so she wouldnât turn around and apologize for being too rough.Â
She got back to her dorm and⊠trashed it while she cried. Disgust and anger flooded her system while she threw her clothes, her trinkets, the photo of you, Ellie, and her mother at your shared high school graduation across the room (she only sobbed harder when she noticed it cracked when it hit the floor). The emotions that rushed through her werenât even for you, but for herself. Ellieâs own hope destroyed her, and she only has herself to blame.Â
She shouldâve known at the time to never speak to you again, but she loved you. She loves you. Every fiber, every cell of her being lived to see you at your happiest; Itâs tortuous how you expose the darkest parts that she wished to keep hidden until the end of time. She hasnât felt like this since she was a teenager.Â
And yet, she still swayed you. Kept you close so she could breathe you in. This is the most you allow, at least: physical touch. She knew better than to allow you to mistreat her, but she couldnât leave you. You both danced until your legs burned, and you fell into her bed the same night.Â
She forced herself to lay in the massacred mattress that sheâd tried to keep made since she was a kid. The least you could do was fluff the pillow you slept on every night.
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click! 3 (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you need a roommate, and you love eggplant. [college au]
WORD COUNT: 7.4kÂ
WARNINGS: photographer/roommate!ellie, ocs an artist with a rep and black :3, crack, light smut [masturbation], sexual tension⊠itâs starting, light angst, weed, brief mention of suicide, pretty cute tbh
one. two. four.
A/N: hi stinks :3 iâm obsessed with themâŠ.. taking my time with these two hope yall like it LOL bye
Butterflies are fluttering, birds are chirping, and the crops are watered when you wake. You slept through the entire night, and the beast inside you is satisfied.Â
But the gorgeous scenery in your mind dies in an instant when you recall what the fuck you did last night. Maybe you are a low-down, dirty whore, just like your roomie said. She has the audacity to terrorize your subconscious enough to actually feature in one of your meat-beat sessions. Not only that, but you busted in two minutes to the thought of her demanding you to fix a window that isnât even broken.Â
You⊠are a hoe. How awkward. You just wanted to fight her days ago, and now your pussyâs got a crush. Not you, your pussy. You accepted that you and your cunt are two separate entities a long time ago.Â
You lay in your bed, eyes melting holes into the ceiling; What the fuck is going on?
Ellie⊠sex⊠her asking for head⊠you asking for head from her⊠The math isnât mathing. Ellieâs gay as a bitch, you know that for a fact, but why her? The math has never mathed, actually. Youâre going to fail statistics, speaking of⊠Is statistics considered math?Â
Itâs still freezing in your apartment. Is Ellie still not back yet? Your shared space is never this silent or cold; A rat could be crawling around in search of cheese and you would hear it like a hounddog.Â
You throw your blankets off and instantly regret it; Youâre shocked snow isnât falling from inside your fucking apartment. It has to be negative thirty in this bitch. If Ellieâs asleep, you donât know how she survived the night.Â
Your knees crack as you quietly pull your door open, light creaks from the hardwood sounding your walk to Ellieâs bedroom. You canât imagine how crazy you look, ear pressed against her door, listening for any movement to prove that sheâs alive and not a fucking block of ice.Â
Either youâre hallucinating, or sheâs mumbling in her sleep. Her voice is hushed and croaky, supposedly asking if Spider-man stole her fucking lunch money to pay the Pope back for stealing⊠something; You canât pick up what she said from out here. Your hand flies over your mouth to hide a laugh. She must be exhausted; When did she get back last night?Â
You let her sleep-talk in peace and head to the kitchen to brew your coffee. You really beat off to that bonehead. Go figure.Â
For the first time since Ellie moved in, youâre gone before her.Â
Youâre strolling the icy streets, strutting to your heartâs content, Tina Snow vibrating your eardrums. Last nightâs nut really did something incredible to your spirit; Youâve never felt lighter. One more unsuspecting gust of wind and youâre taking flight, for sure. Your brain gives subconscious Ellie knuckles.Â
You burst through the coffee shop like you own it, silently celebrating when you realize thereâs no line. You order and receive your dark drink in record time, taking a seat by the large window at the back of the shop. What gorgeous scenery!Â
Your cup is almost empty when your phone vibrates on the table. Itâs Maymay! You answer with the brightest smile. âMy babyyyâ â
âBitch, cut the shit! Fuck you! Why havenât you called?â She yells through the line.Â
âWell, uhâŠâ You almost committed arson in your building! âJust⊠just school stuff! You wouldnât know about that, Ms. Celebrity!âÂ
Your best friend giggles, âShut up! Iâm a D-lister at most!â You shake your head in denial; That internship program doesnât understand the blessing that Amaya holds. Her ear is godsend and she comprehends sound like no other.Â
âHowâs the roomie thing going? I havenât heard much!âÂ
Oh, fuck. â⊠Fine.âÂ
Sheâs silent for a second, âThe fuck does that mean?âÂ
Your fingernail snaps between your teeth. âI mean itâs fine, just like I said.âÂ
Amaya hums, clearly suspicious, â⊠Whatever you say, then.âÂ
âYup.âÂ
She snorts. âAnyway⊠whatâre you doing for Chriâ â
âEllie made me bust with her telepathy.â This is not the conversation you should be having in a coffee shop, but if people heard you, fuck it.Â
â⊠Bitch⊠What?âÂ
âI didnât wanna tell you, okay? I didn't! Incel made her way into my fucking brain and I busted! Sue me!âÂ
Silence passes, and then thereâs laughter from the other line. âAre you high right now?âÂ
âNo, itâs fucking nine in the morningâ â
âAinât nothing wrong with a lilâ wake-and-bakeâ â
âI just told you I mentally fucked my roomie and thatâs what you say?âÂ
She sighs, âI mean⊠I saw the picture you sent me. She's not ugly. Doesnât seem like your type, though.âÂ
âSheâs not my type! I thought about her for two seconds on accident and I came! Abby couldnât even get me there and sheââÂ
âWoah, woah, pause⊠Abby couldnât get you where?âÂ
âNot a location, bitch. I couldnât bust!â A sharp gasp from her. Your brows furrow, âWhat?âÂ
âOh, bitchâŠâ
âWhat, Maya?âÂ
You hear the smile in her tone, âYou gotta crush?âÂ
You gag, âFuck no! Have you lost your mind! MyâŠâ You pause and check to see if anyoneâs near. Nobody. You whisper-shout into the speaker, âMy pussyâs crushing!âÂ
Amaya sucks her teeth in annoyance, âGirlâŠâ
âItâs true! You know she gotta mind of her own! I canât do anything about that!âÂ
Your bestieâs snickering to herself, âWhatever you say, mama. But for someone that thinks with her clit⊠you might wanna have a conversation with her. You know her better than anybody.âÂ
Youâre stunned to say the least. You love Amaya to death, but sheâs batshit crazy to suggest that youâre crushing on someone like Ellie. She called you a worthless tramp in broad daylight, for fucks sake. She wasnât entirely wrong, but it still stung a little.Â
You sip your coffee, âI love you⊠I gotta go.âÂ
âMhmâŠâ You hate how sure she sounds. âLove you, too.âÂ
You nervously twiddle your fingers until your first class, the day dragging even more than usual. Mainly due to the fact that youâre wondering if Amaya was right. Your lectures feel like a blur; All you can think about is Ellie. The spot-covered hermit. Squash-loving loser with a decent nose⊠and decent hands⊠and decently toned arms.Â
Your pussy squeezes in the middle of class when you briefly envision them wrapped around you, and it sends a shockwave to your brain.Â
Oh, shit.Â
Raja was sweet enough to cover your shift for you; You canât focus on credit card sales today.Â
The second you enter your freezing apartment, you hear quiet sobs. Ellie sits at the small table as she scrolls through her phone, forms scattered all over the glass. Sheâs sniffling and wiping her face with her hoodie sleeve, and your brows crease.Â
You shut the door behind you before making your way over to her. Not too close, though.Â
âUhh⊠you good?âÂ
âYeah.â Her voice breaks, and something shifts in you. Somewhere in your chest. Whyâre her cheeks so red?
â⊠You sure?â You cringe.Â
âI said yeah.âÂ
She clearly doesnât want to chat. Whateverâs going on, she can handle on her own. She doesnât need coddling, especially from you. Whyâre you still standing here?
âI, uh⊠I found a Snickerâs.â You slip.Â
Ellie finally faces you, clearly confused. Why canât you just shut the hell up for once? Another shift from your chest at her teary eyes.Â
âWhat?âÂ
âI mean, uh, I bought a Snickerâs. Like, candy.â You pull said bar from your puffer pocket. You did buy it for Abby for when you see her to study, but it looks like your roomie needs it more.Â
â⊠Okay?âÂ
You pull out and hand the wrapped chocolate out to her, âYouâre not you when youâre hungry.âÂ
Her eyes switch between your face and the candy bar; She doesnât look impressed. Maybe sheâs allergic to nuts! You knew you shouldâve got the fucking Sour Strawsâ
âThanks.âÂ
You barely register her taking the bar, her cold fingers brushing against yours. Another zap in your brain. She rips it open and eats it in silence. An awkward chuckle from you, âIs it yummy?â You expect her to tell you to fuck off, but she doesnât. She just nods and chews.Â
Your nosiness gets the best of you, discreetly inspecting the forms on the table. A bunch of random names are crossed out in her notebook, a couple of signed forms crumpled up and raggedy. You donât know what any of this means.Â
âYouâre not slick.â Ellie talks with her mouth full.
âHm?âÂ
âYouâre really gonna read my shit like that?âÂ
You take a seat next to her, â⊠I didnât.âÂ
âOkay,â She mumbles. âRememberâŠâ She scratches at her ear, âRemember that booking that got canceled because of the storm?â You nod. She swallows the last bits of her candy. âI was supposed to take pictures of this couple before their wedding, butâŠâÂ
âThey, uh⊠They donât wanna reschedule. Said itâs too hectic because of the holidays and thereâs not enough time.âÂ
You hum, âOkay⊠So, what does that mean?âÂ
âI canât submit my portfolio without those pictures. And it fucked my money up.âÂ
âDamn⊠how much were they paying?âÂ
She scoffs, âA lot. I donât even wanna think about how much I lost trying to get the setup right.âÂ
You ponder for a second, âI mean, Iâm sure thereâs other people who want nice pics. Youâve been hustling this whole timeâ â
She interrupts, âI donât wanna hustle anymore. Iâm⊠Iâm tired. Itâs fucking exhausting doing promotions by yourself.âÂ
You hear the stress in her voice, and you feel for her. Being a full-time creative can be pretty shitty at times. Most times. The amount of attempts youâve had in commissioning in your lifetime is astronomical; Some pick-ups, lots of disappointment.Â
âWhat was the shoot about? Like⊠the scene, I guess.âÂ
Ellie nibbles at her lip, âRomance.âÂ
âBoooring,â You joke. Ellie doesnât laugh, so you cough awkwardly. âYou gotta come up with a new plan, I guess. Itâs all about the grind mentality.âÂ
âYou sound like a misogynist with a podcast.âÂ
You chuckle and she continues, âThereâs no new plan. The portfolio Iâm submitting is based on emotion. Itâs not⊠complete if love isnât somewhere in there. Thatâs how I see it.âÂ
âSpeaking of see, can I?â You arch your brow, âYour portfolio, I mean.âÂ
âNo.â She says plainly.Â
âWhaâ why not? You saw my paintings!âÂ
âTheyâre on the wall⊠in the living room. Thereâs no other choice but to look at them.âÂ
âBro, what the fuck. Youâre not the only visualist in this house! I might have some pointers you could use!âÂ
âI donât need pointers from you.â Aggravation clouds her pupils. You try not to take offense to that, but it doesnât work.Â
âWhy the fuck not?â You glare.Â
Her tone gets louder, âBecause you wouldnât understand it! Why do you wanna help so badly, anyway!â
âIâmââ But you donât know what to say. Why do you want to help? Ellie squints, awaiting your answer, but nothing comes out. Youâre uncomfortable; Itâs suddenly not that cold in here.Â
âWhatever. Forget I asked!â You rise and march to your room. Another slammed door, another pending noise complaint.Â
Ellie hasnât talked to you in days, and youâre not sure why itâs bothering you. Youâve been sending her looks throughout the entire stats lecture, but she hasnât acknowledged you once. Sheâs just scribbling and tapping her ballpoint on her notebook. Her notetaking seems very intense from where you sit, her eyes scanning the board.Â
Does Ellie like math? Or logistics? Or whatever statistics is considered? Curiosity pokes at you; You donât know much about your roommate. Youâve been living together for nearly a month, and you havenât had one valuable conversation yet. What about photography interests Ellie so much? Why does she enjoy disgusting vegetables? When did she get her tattoo? Is she actually gay or are you a dickhead for assuming?Â
Your venturing thoughts makes class fly by; Another successful day of not taking useful notes!Â
Ellieâs packing her run-down backpack and you watch. Sheâs meticulously placing her books on top of each, at least from what you can see from the big hole on the side. Her headphones are thrown on, and in one swift motion, her bag is on her shoulder and sheâs heading towards the door, holding it open for everyone leaving.Â
You swiftly pack and walk towards the exit. Ellieâs too distracted by her phone to notice you turn the corner to watch her. All the students vacant the room, and she lets the door shut. You follow from a distance as she moves towards the staircase, down the steps, out into the quad and onto the open field. She pauses, so you do too.Â
You follow her line of vision, right at the sky. Itâs pretty today: the sunâs peeking out, just barely, from underneath the dark gray clouds, rays of light highlighting various sections of the quad.Â
Ellie unzips and digs in her bag, retrieving the olive-green polaroid before setting her bag down on the frosted grass. She maneuvers around the grass, trying to avoid obstruction from the trees, adjusting her stance, picking the best angle before holding her camera up. One quick flash, and sheâs holding a photo of the sky.Â
She shakes the picture a bit before squatting to search through her bag, pulling out a large binder and placing the photo in a laminated encasing. You canât see any of the pictures in detail, but there must be a lot in there. That binder is thick as fuck.Â
And just like that, sheâs off into the cold.Â
You wonder what else is in that binder.Â
Youâre starving. The second you get that direct deposit, youâre whipping up something fierce. Shrimp and eggplant have been calling your name for weeks; Youâre ravenous for it.Â
You run up to the apartment to snag a granola bar, Ellie already in the kitchen, propped against the counter eating Kraft mac and cheese.Â
You shut the door behind you, âWonderful weather weâre having, isnât it?âÂ
Ellie stops chewing, eyes large and soft cheeks filled with creamy noodles. âHm?âÂ
You walk to the cupboards, mouthwatering for Nature Valley, âItâs just beautiful outside! The trees, the sky! Almost pretty enough to paint, ainât it!âÂ
More chewing. She just shrugs, but youâre not having it, âI wish I gotta picture!âÂ
â⊠Go take one.âÂ
âOh, my fucking god,â you mutter to yourself, âCan I see the picture you took earlier?âÂ
â⊠Howâd you knowâ â
âThe details arenât important! I was thinkiiing,â you rip open the wrapping, âif I canât see your portfolio, I can see that giant photo book you have!âÂ
She glances around awkwardly, âWere you watching me earlier?âÂ
â⊠Well, yesâ â
âWhat the fuâ why?âÂ
âI like seeing people do shit they enjoy.â You shrug and bite your bar. Ellie isnât looking at you, but her cheeks tint, and it makes you grin. Interesting.Â
You chew and swallow, âEspecially talented people.â You inch closer, just barely. âYou should show me some pictures sometime⊠Iâll show you some of my secret creations, too. A little exchange, if you will.âÂ
Her fingers clench around her plastic spoon, and her breathing changes, cheeks even brighter. Her hands are very nice⊠They look so soft.Â
âThink about it,â you say, quieter, just between the two of you, âCall it⊠roommate bonding.â You crunch and adjust your bag before walking towards the door. âI think itâs overdue!â You throw over your shoulder before shutting the door behind you.Â
Youâre not sure if Ellie likes or hates compliments.Â
Closing was so hectic; you donât make it home until one in the morning. Training rookies is probably the worst part about working in hardware; They never know where shit goes.Â
You donât feel tired, though. The drive back home is usually when your exhaustion takes over, but this ride was smooth. Sleep is going to be difficult to come by tonight.Â
You unlock your front door and⊠push. And push. And push again. What the fuck. Somethingâs blocking the door. You fight with the wood until the crack is wide enough to slip through. The smell in the air is very telling as to why thereâs a pile of hoodies blocking the slim opening at the bottom of the door.Â
Your mouth gapes at the sight of Ellie on the couch with no pants on, blunt in her hand⊠blowing Oâs. Her eyes are glistening and lazy when she opens them. You quickly shut the door and kick the hoodies in their original position before the scent escapes.Â
âHey,â she mutters. Goosebumps rise on your arms at her voice.Â
â⊠Why the fuck are you chiefing in this no smoke building.âÂ
She stares like youâre stupid. âDe-stressing.â
âDeez-fucking nuts! Ellie, weâre not gonna have a place to sleep if we get caught. Bitch ass Carol doesnât play that shit.â You hate your landlord with every fiber of your being. The second anyone accidentally breaks a rule, sheâs on their ass like grass. You canât imagine how sheâs going to react if she sees Ellie being disobedient on purpose. Youâll both be living out of your car. Fucking hag.Â
Your roommate sighs and crosses her legs, boxer shorts riding up her taut thighs. Alright, okay. She pats the empty cushion next to her.Â
âI'm bored.âÂ
âOkay, what about it.âÂ
She taps the cushion again. Your heartbeat spikes for some reason. âRoommate bonding.âÂ
You gawk. Ellieâs never been this relaxed in your presence. Her posture is incredibly comfortable, leaning back against the propped pillows, manspreading. Why is it attractive?
So, you drop your bag and unzip your puffer before plopping down next to her. She says nothing, just extends the lit herb to you. You look between her and the big B. âThatâs a fat doinker.âÂ
â⊠Right.â Ellie puffs once more before attempting to share.Â
You push her cold hand back softly, âI donât smoke.âÂ
âOkay.â One last long pull from her, and sheâs putting out the grass on the ashtray. âDo you wanna play checkers?â She exhales around smoke clouds, cold air blowing in from the barely cracked window.Â
â⊠What.âÂ
âI said do you wanna play checkeâ âÂ
âAre you a lesbian?âÂ
Your eyes widen at your own question. Interrogation? Fuck. Ellieâs looking around the warm space blankly as if sheâs trying to register what the fuck you just said. Youâre a fucking asshole.Â
âE-Ellie, Iâm sorry, I dunno why I askedâ â
âCan you not tell.âÂ
âWell, yeah.â You stutter, â⊠But I thought it was like⊠fucked up to assume based on uh, appearances, or whatever. I donât have good gay-dar, so.âÂ
âIâve been called a carpet muncher since I was eight.âÂ
â⊠Fuck, really?â She nods, face flat. Your fist extends, silently asking for knuckles, âMe too! Thatâs whatâs up.âÂ
âI almost killed myself.â
Your fist drops with your expression. âOh⊠uh, damn⊠Sorry⊠Iâm glad you didnât, though, real shit.âÂ
âWhat does love feel like?âÂ
This conversation is giving you whiplash. âAre you one of those fake-deep potheads? Like, you believe in flat earth and all that other bullshit?âÂ
Ellie blinks dumbly, âUhh⊠I donât think soâŠâÂ
âWhy do you ask?âÂ
Ellie points at the wall, at one of your paintings. Two women laying on a bed of grass, completely at peace, surrounded by colorful flowers and butterflies. A small smile spreads across your face, recalling how excited you were to show your first girlfriend what you made for her birthday.Â
âLove feels like you're getting shot⊠but not in a bad way.â You ramble. âItâs like⊠like, fuck Iâm really gonna die without this person next to me type shit.â You think back to when you made the painting on the wall, the memories of your younger self so deeply infatuated with another person for the first time. It felt eternal back then, souls interconnected.Â
But then your eyes travel to the next painting, right below the latter. Complete void, no color, no life, just darkness, and your expression falls. The faceless girl trapped in the center of madness is calm, though, accepting her doom with grace.Â
âThat makes it worse, thoughâŠâ You think of Dina and how you fought. How nasty it got. How disgusted she seemed with your presence. You almost want to cry as you relive it. âWhen they leave⊠something inside you really does die. That space never really gets filled again. Youâre just kinda⊠stuck with a hole until you croak over.âÂ
âWhat if they donât leave?âÂ
They all leave. â⊠Iâm not sure yet.âÂ
Ellie hums and it goes quiet for a moment. You wonder what sheâs thinking about.Â
âAre you a lesbian?â Your roommate throws back at you. You laugh, âAre you asking if I eat coochie?âÂ
Ellie nods with a giggle. You stiffen; This is the first time youâve heard her laugh. The hairs on your arms stand upright at the sound.Â
âAs a matter of fact, I do!â Ellie laughs harder, head resting against the back of the couch. You watch the apple of her cheeks heighten. But then the wind blows harder than normal and they drop. She's blank again. âThe heaterâŠâÂ
âWhat about it?âÂ
âItâs brokenâŠâÂ
Fuck. âDid you put in a maintenance request?â Her head shakes.Â
âUh⊠why not?âÂ
âBecause I heard you masturbating and forgot.âÂ
Your heart, stomach, pride is at your feet, â⊠What did you just say.âÂ
Ellie finally looks at you, eyes doe-like, guilt swimming in them. âIâm⊠Iâm sorry! I was sleeping and I woke up to pee but I couldnât because you wereâ â
âEllieâ â
âIt kept⊠buzzing, and I couldnât move! I kept asking
myself how is her stamina this fucking good! It didnât turn off until like⊠an hour later! I almost pissed in my bedâ â
Your body heats at her confession; She thought about your stamina? You place a hand on her shoulder to ease her, and she stops. âItâs okay. I just⊠Yeah, this is awkward⊠We gotta submit that request before that next blizzard or weâre fucked.âÂ
Ellie mutters in agreement, but sheâs not listening. Sheâs eyeing your fingers, the ones resting on her shirt. If you move your thumb an inch, youâll touch her collarbone.Â
âWe, um⊠We can send it in the morningâŠâ She whispers okay, and your fingers curl around the fabric. A sharp inhale from her, and you sigh. Her warm breath is hitting your wrist and youâre trying not to squirm. You watch her chest rise and fall at a steady pace, eyes flicking between yours and your hand.Â
You watch her and she watches you, hand inching up until youâre tracing the warm skin under her tee. Your nail scratches her collarbone, just barely, and the muscles in her thigh jerk. Nope. Not happening. You pull away and stand.Â
âThis was⊠youâre funny.â You stare at your feet; You never took your shoes off. âUh⊠bye.âÂ
âBye.â Her voice is flat. Fuck, fuck, fuck, you fucked up.Â
Your shoes go flying and you rush to your room. Youâre not sure if you slammed the door or not; The pounding in your ears is too loud.Â
Ellie fucked up. She knows she did.Â
I heard you masturbating and forgot? You left over an hour ago, and sheâs still replaying that moment in her mind. What the fuck was she thinking? She wants to peel her skin off and her stomach is in knots. The ghost of your hand is still on her. She was freezing before you came home, and now sheâs overheating.Â
Ellie thinks sheâs done a good job of acting normally around you after that night. That doesnât mean she doesnât think about it. All the time.Â
She hates how, every night since it happened, she listens for you. When you come home in the wee hours of the night, the devil convinces her that youâre aching and desperate, dripping and ready to get yourself to the peak you crave. Youâve been working so hard; You deserve to wind down.Â
Itâs sick, she knows. She masks it well, but every time you're home, sheâs hot. Roommate bonding, youâd said. Why did you say it like that, though? You sounded so alluring, like a siren preparing for a kill.Â
Maybe sheâs reading into it too much. You're a flirt and youâre good at itâŠÂ
Itâs either hot or cold with you. Compliments, or cursing. Admiration or judgment. Thereâs no middle ground, and itâs driving her crazy.Â
Why did you have to touch her? You couldâve kept your distance like youâve been doing, like you did in the kitchen. You gave her a chance to run at arm's length.Â
Ellieâs thoughts are racing; She needs to smoke again, but sheâs too distracted to spark. That ache between her thighs is overpowering.Â
Her eyes travel over the painting that captured her attention a few weeks ago. A small self portrait of you. She commends your attention to detail, but still, youâre so gorgeous in person; Thereâs no comparison.Â
Two deep breaths, and her hand is shoved in her boxers, fingers slippery in seconds. She keeps her eyes glued to the painting as she rubs her clit in quick circles, the bud increasing her sensitivity.Â
Itâs like the painting moves with every squeeze of her walls: she can almost see your animated eyes rolling into your skull, your pink tongue out, drool dripping down your chin. And your voice⊠Itâs tantalizing when you want something. She can almost hear you now: itâs so good, right there, I love when you touch me like that.Â
Fuck, she wants your hands on her. Everywhere. Anywhere you want. Sheâs breathing so loud; She hopes you dozed off by now, even in your noticeably restless state.Â
But what if youâre not? What if you forgot something in the living room, or need a drink of water before bed, and you walk in and see the mess you make her? Her hand moves faster at the thought of you angry, disappointed that she couldnât keep her hands to herself. Sheâll never say, but something wicked happens in her underwear when you're fuming. She likes how expressive your eyes are.Â
Her free hand flies over her mouth as her stomach tightens, the beats in her clit and heart synced. She's so close. A few seconds, and she groans into her hand, the walls melting around her when it finally crashes. Tears jerk in her eyes as she rubs herself through it, riding it out for as long as she can.Â
The hand on her mouth slides under her shirt, cold fingers prodding her nipple as her orgasm descends. She gasps into the cold air, trying to catch her breath. She palms her clit and her walls twitch. She tiredly plops onto the couch, hand still in her underwear, eyes glued to your portrait, scaling the wall until she revisits the depiction of you and your first girlfriend.Â
The idea Ellieâs been sitting on for the last few days crashes down on her again. Youâre soft, despite what others may say. You seem like a lover.Â
Itâs Friday. Rent is due. Fuck.Â
You just got paid, and now more than half of your earnings is in your landlord's pocket. You havenât even been grocery shopping yet.Â
Ellie has, apparently. It smells so good in the kitchen. You take back whatever you said about her and her cheffing skills. That soup was delicious; You secretly hope she cooks more. She can get down⊠a little bit.Â
You wipe the tired from your eyes and make way to the kitchen, and your jaw drops, stunned in your spot by the fridge. Empty grocery bags are stacked on the counter, and Ellieâs frying shrimp and eggplant.Â
âHi⊠you didnât eat last night. I heard you talking about eggâ â
Your whimper, followed by several guttural sobs interrupt her greeting, hand flying over your mouth. Ellie simply stands by the counter with wide eyes, fork in hand.Â
Ellie thinks youâve stopped crying, âUh⊠I just wanteâ â
More loud sobs from you. Snot dribbles down from your nose and Ellie cringes, tearing a piece of paper towel and handing it to you. You take it graciously and blow your nose.Â
âThis is,â sob âthe best thing a-anyone,â sniffle⊠sob âhas ever done f-for me.â
Ellie just nods and flips the eggplant. You canât control yourself, arms wrapping around her waist, sobbing into her back.Â
âI, um⊠Consider it a peace offering, I guess.âÂ
âI take back,â heave âI take back whatever dumb shit I said about you before you moved in,â heave âYouâre so⊠fuck you, Ellie!â You hug her tighter.Â
âQueers gotta stick together.â She mumbles.Â
âLike wet pussy lips!â You wail, fat tears seeping into her t-shirt. She snickers to herself, âGet a plate.âÂ
You sniffle all the way to the cupboards and set the tiny table.Â
Chef Butch. Thatâs Ellieâs new name around these parts.Â
For someone who supposedly âhates eggplantâ, she seasoned and fried the fuck out of it. Get this bitch on the Food Network!
Youâre full and energized before leaving the house for once. You donât even need your morning coffee.Â
âHey, uh⊠can I ask you something?â Ellie calls from the table.
You pause dish scrubbing to look at her, âMhm.âÂ
âItâs kinda⊠a big deal.â She mutters, eyes flickering nervously.Â
â⊠Should I sit down, or?â
âItâs not bad. Itâs just⊠I donât know.âÂ
You rinse your hands and set the last plate on the rack to dry. You grab a clean towelette and sit across from her. Ellie canât meet your eyes and her cheeks are fiery. You smirk.Â
âNeed help with something?âÂ
Her head bobs, eyes glued to the table.Â
âThen ask me.â You lean closer. Ellie whispers your name. A deep sigh from her, lips parting around her question.Â
âDo you wanna model for my portfolioâ â
âOf course Iâll help you send nudesâ â
Confusion paints her face, âWhat.â
ââŠWhat.âÂ
âWhat did you just say.âÂ
âNothing.â You shrug, face burning.Â
âYou can say no. Itâs not that serious.â That guarded twinge in Ellieâs voice has returned. You donât like it.Â
âYou think Iâm pretty?â You tease with a pout.Â
âWhat.âÂ
âYou think Iâm sooo hot and sexy that youâre gonna make me the star of yourâ â
Ellie blushes, âYouâre not the⊠star of anythâ â
Your hands wave excitedly, âIâm so honored! Iâd love to! When do we start!âÂ
Ellie sighs, massaging her temples, âDo you have work on Sunday?âÂ
âNot anymore!â You do a little dance in your seat, âWhat am I gonna be doing in the pics, o ye camera master?â Her ears are so red. Why is she so fucking nervous? Youâve already accepted!Â
âJust look like youâre in love.âÂ
â⊠Oh.âÂ
Ellie grimaces at your tone, âListen, I only have two weeks to finish this submission. I havenât had any luck finding people to help me out!âÂ
You pause, âIs this why you buttered me up with a buss down plate?âÂ
â⊠Would you hate me if I said yes?âÂ
âFuck, Ellieâ â
âIâm desperate!â She exclaims, âBut I also donât wanna just ask anybody! I need the photos to be believable! And you kinda⊠you kinda get it!â Ellie points to the painting of you and your first love.Â
The silence is thick as you explore her face. Her forestry-filled eyes are nervous, but thereâs a glimmer of hope in her pupils. You like it; Her orbs look brighter. Greener somehow.
âI wanna see it, then.âÂ
âSee what?âÂ
âYour big ass binder⊠and your portfolio!âÂ
Her eyes roll. âPick one.âÂ
âWooow, youâre really gonna ruin another opportunity for roommate bonding? Thatâs wild. Alright.âÂ
âPick one.â Sheâs stern with her demand⊠You like that, too.Â
You smirk. âShow me your portfolio.âÂ
She crosses her arms over her chest. âYou see it when itâs finished. After the pictures are done. Take it or leave it.âÂ
âOkay, damn,â You give up, âSo⊠what do I gotta do for prep?âÂ
âNot much right now. I have to set up my equipment and all thatâŠâ She glances around the living room, âweâll talk about the rest later.âÂ
ââKay.â You twiddle your fingers together before the biggest light bulb shines over your head.Â
âI also get 40% of the earningsâ â
âFuck no.â She says with a small grin. You pout.Â
You knew something was wrong when Abby randomly invited you over to study⊠on a Saturday night. You donât know how sheâs a STEM major; You havenât seen her with a book since youâve met her!Â
The second she opened her door, something was off. Itâs been days since youâve seen her and she barely reacted to the grilled cheese you brought. Her answers have been curt and sheâs not laughing at any of your jokes. Your Cheetos are doing a great job at soothing your anxiety. You want to comfort your friend with whateverâs bothering her, but youâre not sure how.Â
So, you talk. And talk. And talk about Ellie.
âIâm not gonna lie,â You crunch, comfortable on Abbyâs beanbag. âIâm kinda excited! Iâve never done a photoshoot before.âÂ
Abby shrugs from her work desk, voice monotone, âI mean, just be mindful. Itâs obviously not a game for her so you needa take it seriously.âÂ
Your brows furrow, âWhat do you mean?âÂ
âYour roommate slash crushâ â
Your head shakes, âI donât have a crushâ â
âSlash crush,â Your friend emphasizes, âasked you to be a part of probably one of the biggest creations of her life. If that photo book or whatever is as important as you say, itâs not just a âphotoshootâ for her.âÂ
⊠Nah, youâre still confused.Â
Abby scoffs, âA photoshoot about romance and youâre her only model, making you breakfast, and whatever else sheâs done! How much does she have to spell it out for you?âÂ
âI donât understand why youâre yelling!â
âIâm not fucking yelling! Iâm watching out for you before you do something you regret!âÂ
You sit up straighter, âAnd what does that mean!â
âWhat have you been saying this entire time? I donât wanna live with someone I fucked!â She mocks, âIt seems like yâall are pretty close to that.âÂ
You stare pensively, âWe havenât fucked and weâre not going to! Youâre doing the fucking most!âÂ
âYeah, whatever.â She continues to scribble.Â
âAbby⊠whatâs wrong?â You clumsily stand from the bean bag. âIâm so conâ â
âYou wanna know whatâs wrong?â She snaps, pen slamming on the desk. âEvery time we see each other, you talk about her! Iâm sick of hearing about⊠whatever the fuck you have going on at home, quite frankly! We canât even joke around because youâre so pressed about someone you donât even like!âÂ
Youâre going to cry; You can feel it. Abbyâs never been this upset with you, âWhy did you wait so long to tell me this? I wouldâve stopped coming to you a long time ago!âÂ
âBecause I cared and didnât want you to feel by yourself while Mayaâs away! Thatâs why! But now, itâs likeâŠâÂ
A tired sigh from her and she gives up, hand waving dismissively, âTalking about this shit is pointless. Iâm going to bed. Shut the door behind you.â Abby rises and brushes past you, switching her lamp off and climbing into her warm bed. You allow your tears to fall as you gather your belongings, gently shutting her door behind you and attacking your face with your sleeve. You hate crying in public.Â
The elevator ride feels much longer than it shouldâve been as you weep. The doors shutter open, and you can see the weather is not on your side. Itâs pelting bullets outside; You knew you shouldnât have walked.Â
âYou got a ride?âÂ
You look over at the security guard perched behind the front desk. Fuck all feds, but Stanleyâs cool. You shake your head.Â
âYou canât walk home in that. Driving is also dangerous but,â He shrugs, and you sigh. You pull your phone out of your pocket.Â
âHey, Siri⊠Call Chef ButchâŠâÂ
âCALLING CHEF BUTCH.âÂ
Stanleyâs warm laughter eases your shoulders.Â
DING!
You unlock your phone and smile at Ellieâs text, rising from your chair.Â
âAlright, Stan. Pray I donât turn into Frosty out there,â You throw over your shoulder.Â
He laughs, opening the heavy door for you, âI will! Get home safely!â You throw your hood over your beanie, easing past him and nearly being blown away by the fucking wind. How did Ellie drive in this shit!
You somehow manage to follow the view of your car, pounding on the passenger window to get Ellie to unlock it. You miss your step on the curb and fall face first into the seat. You hear Ellieâs laughter.Â
âYou alright?âÂ
âYup! Fucking peachy, thanks!â You stumble in and slam the door with the wind, out of breath, body melting from the heat. âYou couldnât have parked a little closer?âÂ
â⊠No.âÂ
You stare at her through the snow in your lashes, âEllie, take us home, please. Iâm annoyed and going through a fucking breakdown, like I canât be outside right now. Iâm gonna pass out!â
â⊠You wanna talk about it?âÂ
âNo.â You spit.Â
âAlright.â She puts the car in drive, but her foot is still pressed on the brake.Â
âI just canât believe this shit right now!â You ramble anyway. âYou think you know a person, like, fuck! This is stupid!â You punch the glove compartment.Â
â⊠What happâ â
âLike, fuck! Fuuuck! Like what the fuck!âÂ
Youâre screaming your head off and Ellieâs just watching, face flat as ever. It makes you scream louder. But your wails pause when your eyes flicker downward. Veiny hands clenched around the steering wheel. Your screams suddenly sound like whimpers. Whenâs the last time you had sex?
Is it sad that the thought of Ellie choking you out is easing your meltdown? This is the worst day ever!Â
âIâm gonna rip my fucking face offâ â
âWhy're you staring at my hands like that?â
âWhat the fuck, Iâm not staring. Be quiet.âÂ
Your roommate grins like a fox, âOkay.âÂ
The carâs moving and so are your eyes, all over Ellie, wherever they can reach. Youâre pissed and horny and you need a shot.Â
âYou ever get the urge to strangle the fuck outta someone?â
âMhm.âÂ
You ponder, âHow does it feel to smoke weed?âÂ
She shrugs, âIt feels good.â
âHow good? Scale of one to ten.âÂ
â⊠Thirteen.â
âBetter than sex?â You ask quietly. Your brain is elsewhere, locked on the bulging blue veins in her hand, following the lines through her hoodie.Â
She ponders, â⊠Yes.âÂ
âYouâre biased, though. I canât trust you.âÂ
âStop staring at my hands like that.â Her low voice is like a kick in your back, spine slightly arching in your chair. Youâre glad sheâs looking at the road; Sheâs making you go into heat and she doesnât need to see it. Maybe Abby was right about you being a fucking hypocrite.Â
âOr what?â Your tone is icy, and she licks her lips.Â
âIâll pull over.âÂ
You shudder at her boldness, âPull over.âÂ
Your car jerks to a stop and you jolt forward, eyes still glued onto Ellieâs mouth. One kiss⊠It isnât sex. Itâs just kissing; Who doesnât love kissing? Youâre alone and warm and itâs gorgeous outside. It would be just a kiss. Just one, just one.Â
Ellieâs staring at you, eyes reminiscent of the storm outside. Flurrying and dark. Her tongue swipes over her lips again, and your gut swirls. âStop staring at my hands.â You suck your bottom lip in your mouth when her breath hits it. Sheâs leaning forward and so are you. Just one kiss, thatâs all you need.Â
Your pussyâs talking and sheâs loud⊠Literally meowing for her.Â
âIs that a fucking cat?â Ellie whispers, nose brushing yours⊠She can hear that? How horny are you?Â
âDude, thatâs a cat! Thereâs a cat right there!â Her gasps shock you, and you peer out the window, finding a small, dark spot in gusts of white snow. There is a cat!Â
âOh, my fucking god! Ellie, what the fuckââ Youâre pushing the door open and she grabs your arm.Â
âWait, youâre gonna fucking fallâ â
âWe canât leave her, sheâs gonna die out here!â You rush out in seconds and youâre slipping like a cartoon character on a banana. Youâre kissing the air to lure the kitty over, but she just cries. Sheâs probably starving!Â
âCâmere, baby, câmon!â You hear Ellie muttering curses from behind you. After almost busting your face on icy concrete, youâre finally close enough to scoop up the shivering ball of fur, and youâre sobbing as you wrap your scarf around her tiny body.Â
âEllie,â you choke, âWe caâcanât leave h-herâ â
âOkay, okay, stop crying, where is she?â You hold up the bundled fabric and Ellie gently takes her, shoving her in her hoodie before grabbing your wrist and guiding you to the car. Ellie hops in the driver's seat, the car filled with desperate meows and your hysterical sobs.Â
Ellie cranks the heat and holds the wrapped furball, softly cooing at her.Â
âWhereâs your mama, hm?âÂ
Meow!Â
âNo mama?âÂ
Meow! Meow!
Youâre wailing, âSheâs a fucking orâorphanâ â
âCan you be quiet.â Ellie snaps.Â
âOââyou sniffle harshly, âOkâokayâ â
âHold her, I gotta drive. Weâre going to Petco.â Ellieâs zooming down the street, whipping and swerving. Youâre almost positive she ran a red light.Â
âI know you donât like small animals, but c-can we keep her, pleaseâ â
Ellieâs lip curls, âItâs not that I donât⊠not like themââ She rambles on, but youâre so focused on the baby in front of you. Poor thing looks so tired. What if sheâs sick? Oh God, she wouldâve froze to death if you didnât stopâ
You blabber to her between choked whimpers, âI love you so much, weâre gonna get you safe, donât worryâ â
âOh, my fucking god,â Ellie sighs softly beside you.Â
Pheromones will have to wait. Youâre a mother now.Â
After your emergency pet escapade, you and Ellie sneak the cat past the complex security and into your apartment. If anyone finds out â if Carol finds out â youâre fucked⊠and unhoused.Â
Small meows are filling your ears. Your babyâs full, at least. Poor thing was horking down minced tuna in the car. Her teeth are so small and cute. She looks like sheâs going to doze off soon.Â
You watch as Ellie sets up her little area in the living room⊠Right next to her fucking photography set up when the fuck did she do thatâ
The corner of the living room is fully decked with maroon and ebony backdrops, Ellieâs sticker-littered camera resting proudly on its stand. Thereâs a⊠big ass umbrella-looking thing towering over the setup and a stool on the dark floor cover. Thereâs a small, white briefcase on it, tied down with a padlock. Itâs either a gun or her portfolio.Â
âBring her over here.âÂ
Your gawking gets cut short as you cradle kitty over to Ellie, handing her over so she can lay her on the small, paw-shaped bed. Sheâs purring; Your heartâs melting.Â
âI see you havenât changed your mind.âÂ
Ellieâs tucking your baby in, âAbout?â She hums.
âThe shoot.â You whisper.Â
âWhy would I?â She faces you and stands. You shrug nonchalantly, but your mindâs racing. You probably found someone worthy of doing it.Â
Ellie inches closer, looking down at you. âConsider it roommate bonding⊠Featuring adopted cat child.âÂ
You giggle. She's staring at your smile, all over your face. Into your eyes. Yours flicker down to her mouth. Either you're hallucinating, or sheâs leaning closer. One kiss wonât hurt.Â
âUmâŠâ She whispers, gaze dropping to the floor. âEarlier I was gonna⊠say something.âÂ
âWhat is it?âÂ
She shrugs, â⊠I forgot.âÂ
âOkay.â Youâre whispering now. Sheâs staring at your mouth. Her eyes are hypnotizing; There's a universe in them. A forest with trees that grow for eternities, miles and miles of green meadows.Â
âYouâre staring.â She mutters.Â
âSo are you.âÂ
Ellie wants to say something. You can see it. But she doesnât, and neither do you. âGotta get up early⊠Iâll see you tomorrow?â Her voice cracks.Â
Youâre cheesing and your hearts in your throat. âYes. See you tomorrow.âÂ
One last toothy grin, sheâs gone into her room, door shutting softly for the first time. You exhale like youâve been holding your breath, already missing her presence.Â
Youâre giddy when you finally climb into bed. You canât help but think that Ellie is, too.Â
longest taglist ive ever had i am very sorry if i forgot somebody pls dont hate me i am neurodivergent : @starologist @hrtmal @ohlawdthebirds @villainousbear @timmy-27 @inf3ct3dd @aouiaa @shurisbigtoe @emothurman @lonelyfooryouonly @imelliesgf @baumbii @brackishkittie @littletinyladybugs @r1miese @horror-whoree @elsbunny222 @elliesatchel @makemescreamel @lav3nd3rhaze @elliezflower @ellieloml @ellies-princess @saverdelrey @womenofarcane @muthafuckingstargirl @mina-281 @yuckyfucky @aimformyheartt @elstoy @skylerwhitwyo @sawaagyapong @nil-eena @dewylittlestars @sakiigami @feelsoseencantdream @ellieslittlegf @fictionalgap @liabadoobee @whooknooows @sarahsmileslikesarahd0esntcare @qtgaslighter @p4ison1vy @eviestevie-14 @weaselot @elliewbbg @elsmissingfingers @lmaoo-spiderman @lyssaspengler @elliewilliamsmunch @gummydummykj @kiwikeysblog @juniorsfav @louleele @alittlextrahoney @tohoko @333-starhotline @girlkissersco @saplingkoi @crxmxnzl-c0rpzes @elliew-illiamsmissingfingers @diddiqueen @alexisvs-world @mostlyhornyandsad @lolaaa699999 @elsblunt @niyahlovesu
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click!: in frame. 3 (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you crave redemption more than love. [idk au]
WORD COUNT: 17.2k
WARNINGS: professionalphotographer!ellie, strugglingartist!oc whoâs black, FLUFF????, angst, mentions of deceased family members, weed, sexual tension, SMUT AGELESS BLOGS/MDNI, they fuck a lot, fingering, pussy eating/face sitting, tribbing YAAY, slut shaming but consensual, fucking on camera, dirty talk mmm, STRAP SUCKING!!! SUCK MORE STRAPS!!, squirting, i think thatâs it but i donât remember tbh
A/N: omg finallyâŠ.. heyyy idk when iâll return to this fic tbh âŠ. đđ but i love them so much and i always will. fav couple imo⊠HOPE THIS MAKES UP FOR THE LONG WAIT BYEEEEE LOL
Ellieâs trying her hardest not to panic.Â
Her car is quiet, not a sound coming from either of you, ears comforted by the whistling winds and rustling trees⊠And Pickleâs quiet coos. She sits in your lap as your thumb caresses her head; Ellieâs can see how she looks up at you, eyes full of love. She's never going to stop reminding you of how much your kitty missed your presence.
Her mind races with unanswered questions, one of the main being why you havenât said anything to her since the two of you left her fatherâs home. She yearns to hear your voice.Â
She yearns for you⊠but youâre not yourself, at least from what she can remember. She canât shake the curiosity thatâs been pestering her since youâve reconnected; What the hell happened to you while you were apart? The energy you brought to your formerly shared home was irreplaceable: your midnight rambles, your nerve-wracked pacing, your cheery laughter⊠Your laugh. She misses it terribly. Itâs not the same. Nothing about you is.Â
Ellieâs itching to ask, but her fatherâs statement blares red like a sonic in her mind.Â
Did she tell you sheâs in therapy?
You want to talk⊠You suggested it! Ellieâs tummy twists in anxious knots, hands tightly gripping the leather of the steering wheel.Â
⊠What the hell happened to you?Â
âWe⊠we can sit anywhere.â Ellie whispers to you.Â
She stands next to you by the front door while Pickle wanders around with her toy mouse between her teeth. You nod in acknowledgment but your gaze stays forward. Ellie peers downward when she hears subtle brushing of skin, catching glimpses of your thumbnail digging into your index finger. She grabs your hand to get you to stop. âSit with me?â She asks gently, and you allow her to pull you towards the black cushions. You finally sit and she follows, keeping some space between you. Every bit of her attention is on you; She hopes it isnât suffocating.Â
âYourâŠâÂ
Ellie follows your gaze at your croak, inspecting the framed photo of young her and her parents at her high school graduation sitting proudly on the bookshelf. Your pupils are overcast in sorrow, and Ellieâs heart jerks painfully.Â
âYour dadâs really nice.â You whisper.Â
Ellie wasnât expecting that, but she nods, âHe⊠he really likes you. I know he was a little⊠standoffish, but he likes yââ
Her words are cut when two large tears dribble down your face like rain on glass. She scoots closer, brows furrowed in concern, one hand intertwining with yours while the other cups your wet cheek. âTalk to me, babe. What⊠whatâs going on?â Ellie pushes as softly as she can. She doesnât know how to help if you donât say anything.Â
â⊠Is it me? D-Did I do something?â She asks with a heavy heart, and you instantly shake your head. Your free hand comes up to land on top of hers, warmth radiating off your fingertips.Â
âY⊠Your dadâs r-really nice.â You exhale before releasing a choked sob. Ellieâs up in an instant, squatting in front of you as she tries to get you to calm down, telling you to breathe, to count, but you donât. Ellie catches your weight as you fall against her, arms wrapping around you as she whispers comforts in your ears, blinking away her own tears. Youâre holding her like sheâs slipping from your fingers, each guttural sob synched with the squeezes on her shoulder.Â
âShhh, sâokay⊠Sâgonna be okay.âÂ
Her whispers arenât only for you. Theyâre for her, too.Â
âEllieâŠâÂ
âYeah, babe?â Ellieâs lips brush against your forehead, and you sniffle.Â
â⊠Ever been to therapy?âÂ
âUm⊠no?â She ponders with a huff at the ceiling, âI thought about it, butâŠâÂ
âItâs really hard,â Ellieâs heartbeat sounds like the beating rain outside, flowing into your ears like water on rocks, âNever do it. This shit sucks,â You snicker wetly.Â
â⊠Noted,â She laughs softly and plants a kiss on your forehead. Your eyes shut when she whispers, âWanna talk about it?âÂ
You nod into her neck as she rubs your back, âI just⊠I dunno where to startâŠâ Your mind races, brain filled to capacity with every mistake youâve made in the past year.Â
âJust⊠say how youâve been feeling,â She suggests. Her heartbeat seems louder⊠or is that yours? Your tears fall from your cheek and into her shirt.Â
âI just⊠really miss my mom.â You say shakily. Ellie sighs from above and holds you tighter.Â
âMe, too⊠it hits me out of nowhere sometimes,â She mutters, âWe werenât even⊠close like that, but it hurtsâŠâÂ
âWhat happened?âÂ
âShe died.â She says plainly.Â
You snort, âN â not that! I mean why werenât you guys close?â Ellie mumbles oh, fuck, sorry between hearty laughs and you smile.Â
âI dunno⊠like, whenever I think back on good times, my dadâs always there. I neverâŠâ She pauses and your head rises to look at her face. Sheâs deep in thought, and you patiently wait for her to resurface. You brush the flyaways back from her face.Â
âShe just⊠wasnât thereâŠâ She mumbles, âAnd when she was, we fought. All the timeâŠâÂ
Thereâs so much more that she wants to say â you can see it in her eyes, how the trees in them brush with memory â but she chooses not to elaborate. She nervously fiddles with the charm of the necklace around your throat.
âMy dad was like that.â You whisper back.Â
âWhat happened?âÂ
You grin, âHe died.â Ellieâs brows droop in confusion.Â
â⊠Iâm sorry?⊠âÂ
âDonât be. He ruined my life⊠Your dadâs really nice, by the way.âÂ
A small smile stretches across her face, âSo Iâve been told.â Her fingers travel over your face, over your nose, âWanna talk about him?âÂ
â⊠I think I shouldâŠâÂ
âUp to you,â She whispers and your chest nearly bursts, âIâm listeningââ
Meow!
Ellie cranes her neck to look up at Pickle sitting on the arm of the couch, right above her head. âSorry⊠weâre listening.â You giggle and pat Pick-Pickâs head before laying your head onto Ellieâs shoulder. Words escape before you can stop them.Â
âI hit rock bottom when he died.â You breath wobbles, âLike, I thought I was there already when I dropped out butââ
âYou dropped out?âÂ
Oh⊠You never told her. Fuck. Youâre pitiful, â⊠YeahâŠâÂ
âWhy?â She asks, concerned. You cringe in embarrassment.Â
âJust⊠I was sad. I couldnât focus on anything. My grades were fucked, regardless, so.â You can practically hear the whirs in Ellieâs brain turning with a billion questions. You answer the most recurring.Â
âNo, it wasnât because you moved out.âÂ
â⊠Iâm sorââ
You sit up, âDonât you dare. Stop.âÂ
The sadness in her eyes is evident, but she quiets. And then stands and bolts to her room like a fucking track star.Â
âE â what the fuck! Ellie!â
You rush after her but sheâs miles ahead, already chest to chest with you in her bedroom entrywayâŠ
Or chest to folder.Â
No fucking way.Â
âI â I owe you this.â
âEllieââ
âPlease.â She whispers, âI want you to see it.âÂ
After all this time. Her fucking portfolio.Â
âItâs the most⊠important thing to me. I want you to see.âÂ
Her hand is gentle when it closes around yours and guides you to the couch. She simply sets the leather binder on your lap and kisses your cheek.Â
âConsider it my therapy⊠or whatever.â She huffs.Â
You laugh wetly. Why the fuck are you crying?Â
Listening to her explain her passions to you was⊠an enlightening roller-coaster. Sheâs captured imagery that reflects her emotions in the most subtle, but brilliant of ways; thereâs joy, thereâs anger, thereâs sadness, thereâs loss. You two were a wailing mess when she dedicated an entire section honoring her mother. Her father. They have the most beautiful relationship.Â
Romance was last. And itâs filled with you in red, right in front of that makeshift backdrop from your old apartment. Youâre never gonna stop crying.Â
There was a time where you couldnât look at yourself no matter what you did, completely shrouded in self-hatred and neglect, but seeing these photos of you from another perspective, from Ellieâs perspectiveâŠÂ
Youâre a wreck, but she holds you. Tells her how pretty you are. How happy she is to have you back.Â
Your sobs are eventually tamed by her rubs on your back, the kisses on your forehead. She hasnât said it, and neither have you, but you feel it. That electrifying pull that takes over whenever you are separated from each other.Â
You wake up with a dead arm on Ellieâs couch⊠with Ellieâs arms around you. Your heartâs rhetorical legs are kicking its feet in the air with sparkles in its eyes. You attempt to adjust your position to alleviate the static in your hand, but Ellieâs arms squeeze around you with a grumbled whine. You hold back a snicker.Â
âEllie.â You whisper. âCâmon, babe, my armâs asleep.âÂ
Another irritated whine. You laugh quietly and push your hips back to put some space between you. A bolt of electricity flies down your spine when a cold, stern hand latches onto your hip.Â
âYou know better. Stop.âÂ
Your brow arches curiously, âWhatchu gonâ do, Ms. Bott ââ You gasp, âEllie, holy shit, are you a bottom?âÂ
â⊠Weâre talking about this now?â She croaks, sleep cracking in her throat.Â
âIâm curious! Youâre great at it so I had to ask.â
âWhat the fuck does that even mean?âÂ
You scoff, âUm, itâs a compliment. You take it like a G. Say thank you.â You push back again for emphasis. Another threatening squeeze on your hip. Your bottom lip catches between your teeth to hide a smile. She's so cute.
âI said stop. And Iâm not a bottom.âÂ
âOkay, lemme paint the picture. Fuckinâ milf from the club asks you to slide some silicone in her ass for shits and gigs. You doinâ it or nah,â You snark and push back harder on her, âYou squirted in my mouth six timââ
A thundering smack rings through Ellieâs silent living room as pain ripples through your asscheek. âIâm not a bottom.â She says in your ear and you attempt to hide a shudder.Â
âLight work, no reaction,â You groan and Ellie snickers, rubbing over the sizzling skin to soothe the ache. âYou gotta strap?âÂ
âDo you ever stop talking.â She snaps in annoyance and lets you go. You take the opportunity to jump in her lap, suddenly full of energy. Her hands land on your hips to steady you. âI donât have a fucking strap.â She mumbles, eyes full of your tits.
âI know thatâs right, baby! Hashtag BringBackTribbing,â You laugh giddily. This is the most alive youâve felt in a year, âI look good on top? Huh?â You ask, goofily squeezing your breasts over your shirt. You jiggle them for emphasis, and Ellie flushes.Â
Ellie tries to hide a smile, âYouâreââ
âHot? Sexy? The best youâve ever had?â You suggest playfully.Â
ââ Incredibly annoying.âÂ
âAnnoyinglyyy sexy?â You hum, and Ellieâs eyes twinkle with adoration. You smile and grab her hands, lacing her fingers with yours. She squeezes gently before inspecting your fit. Her dadâs fit, moreso. You hope Mr. Miller doesnât hate you for snagging his drip⊠again.
âDid you pack a bag?â She asks quietly. You shake your head, kissing her knuckles. She flushes.Â
âWe gotta get you some stuff⊠if you wanna stay a little longer?âÂ
Your jaw drops in excitement, âAre we⊠officially U-Haul lesbians?âÂ
âI didnât say thatââ
âDonât have to,â Your voice lowers as you unravel your hands, leaning down to whisper in her ear, âWanna get me some trinkets to remember me by? FuckingâŠâ You ponder, âForget Me Nots or whatever?â You peck her ear, and her hands grab your ass.Â
âT-Thatâs not what that means, you idiot.â Her back arches when your lips travel down her neck, âAre you in heat or something, what the fuckââ
âMhm,â You grind down on her and she sighs, âbeen outta commission for a very⊠very long time.â You gasp like youâre dying, âMust⊠drink⊠life-bloodââ
âDoes tribbing ââ You move your hips faster, and whines escape you and Ellie, âaw, shit â fuck, cause chaffing?â
âTryna find out?â You gasp when your clit catches on fabric.Â
âMight fuckinâ be â fuck, like that ââ Ellieâs nails dig into your hips to help guide you on top of her, right where she needs you. The friction on your clit makes your thighs quiver. Ellie cranes her neck to connect your lips in a simmering kiss; your hands plant above her on the arm of the couch for leverage, pushing your hips down hard; She gets lost in it, no longer being able to keep up with your thirsty kisses as she whines for more.Â
âCanât fuckinâ â fuck â wait ââ
You try to fight against her tight grip on your hips, but sheâs forbidding, stern with her clutches. She pushes you up until thereâs room to pull and kick her pants off, and you follow, tugging your shirt up and over your head before clumsily yanking your pants off, tossing the discarded fabric across the back of the couch. Sheâs upright when your lips reattach in a fiery kiss, tongues swirling messily against one another, releasing sighs into each other's mouths.Â
Ellieâs hands are suddenly shy where they sit on your waist, unsure, silently pleading for guidance. You sightlessly grab her wrists and tug them up until they rest over your sports bra. She gasps in your mouth when your hands press down on top of hers so she can cup you, feeling your nipples rise underneath the fabric. You allow her hands to wander, squeezing at your chest and tweaking your nipples, body shuddering with every brush of cold fingertips against your skin.Â
Heat pools in your underwear as she massages all over your skin; your chest, your thighs, the plush around your hips, anywhere she can reach, sheâs on, icing your skin like snow. Youâre shocked at how delicate her touch is despite the coarseness of her skin, the complete opposite of yours. You tore her apart the night prior, sunk as deeply as you could into her brain, her core, the concave of her spine; touched her from muscle memory. Almost instinctive, but sheâs curious. Not controlling or domineering. Sheâs explorative and unfamiliarly soft, and youâre stunted, but the wettest youâve ever been and sheâs barely touched you.Â
Her hands travel rise to pull your bra up, plush lips smacking against your collarbones as it's tossed to the floor.Â
Youâve never not rushed to have sex; itâs always desperate and fast, but satiating for the time being. It does the job, gives you a boost of energy, gets you through the day until youâre craving it again. The dirtiness of it all⊠Ellie doesnât feel like that. Dirty.Â
Her hands feel like flowers against you, littering your formerly bruised skin with petals, orchids replacing the stood hairs on your neck and arms. The array of florals and green in her gaze are being passed onto you, and itâs making you lightheaded; itâs almost overwhelming. Youâre torn between hiding from and searching for her.Â
âEllieâŠâÂ
She doesnât answer, just traces your spine with her mouth on your neck.Â
âE-EllieâŠ?â Youâre unsure of what to say, but you need to know that sheâs here with you.Â
âAm I doing it right?â She hums against you, and your clit jumps in confirmation. Sheâs doing it too right and you need her closer. You nod and tug her bun out of her hair, fingers entangling with soft pili, strands softer than wool.Â
âLay down?â Sheâs not demanding⊠Your heart pulls at her tone. You pull away and keep your gaze down, at the wall, anywhere but hers until you're laying back on the couch, the cushions melding with your spine. Ellieâs mouth returns, dousing you in affections. Sheâs careful, each breath on your hips making you jerk. For the first time, your hands are stiff, frozen. You donât know where to touch, so you keep them clenched by your face.Â
âGood, baby?â She lures and you hum in approval. Youâre not good. Youâre about to start crying and your heart is fit to burst, to splatter and bleed tears all over her eggshell walls. You donât know what to do.Â
You feel wanted with every grab at your tits, how she inches your underwear down to litter kisses along the sensitive, each trail of her tongue littered with desire. Each breath you take tremors.Â
I missed you so much, she keeps whispering against your skin, I missed you, baby. Couldnât stop thinking about you when I left. You say it back, how sorrowful you were whenever she crossed your mind, how you craved her in the wee hours of the night for years, fiending to breathe her scent. Her smell is wafts of blooming roses, fresh rainfall, the sun rays peeking out from behind the clouds and dousing the streets in light.Â
Your underwear is down in seconds, but she doesnât rush; makes you wait for her touch. You beg her shamelessly, hips twitching with every peck on your thighs, leaving maroon and purple blemishes on your legs before inching up, up, up, until her breath hits your dew. Your thighs quake when she licks experimentally; one quick swipe between your folds has you gasping, nails piercing the skin of your palm. Another swift flick over your pulsing bud, and youâre whimpering, hips bucking.Â
Look at me⊠Look at me, look at me, look at me, pleaseâŠÂ
The desperation in her voice lifts you onto your elbows, neck arched downward until youâre met with her clammy forehead and soft eyes, patiently waiting for your instruction. You smirk down at her with a scoff.
âYouâre cute,â You mumble huskily and her feet kick like a doll behind her, kissing your inner thighs.Â
âShow me what to do?â she asks with doe-eyes, nibbling at the skin.Â
âGimme your hand,â she extends her arm to you and you hold her wrist, licking her middle finger like a kitten. Her thighs press together and you smile, tongue darting out to swirl around the tip before sucking it between your lips. She makes a pained noise against your flesh when you pull her digit into the plushness of your hollowed cheeks, pushing her fingers in until in cranes at the back of your wet muscle. Your throat closes when you gag and she lets up with a soft sorry. An uncontrollable giggle garbles around her finger at her dark cheeks and scared eyes. You release her with a wet pop!
âYou good. Ready?â Her head bobs.Â
âHmâŠâ You ponder, âPussy is like⊠like an Xbox controller.âÂ
Ellie blinks. â⊠Okay.âÂ
You explain, âYou really gotta feel around for the⊠buttons and whatever. You needa press them from the inside and⊠outside. At least for me⊠Everyoneâs differentââ
âIâm not fucking everyone, Iâm fucking you.â She states with confidence, and wetness gushes out of you like a faucet. She eyes your cunt like a predator to a bleeding carcass, lips curling over her fangs at the flesh between your thighs.Â
Your voice shakes, âJ-Just sayinâ⊠You just gotta touch me and Iâll tell you if itâs doing the job or not.â She nods and her gaze changes. Itâs focused and raunchy when her thumb lands on your clit; she wastes no time, pressing deep, calculated circles over the throbbing button, drawing more wetness from between your walls. You eye her like a hawk, how she traps her lip between her teeth, how she stares at your pussy with unwavering devoutness; she replies to every last one of your moans with her own, like she can feel the pleasure sheâs spoiling you with whipping deep in her tummy.Â
Her caress picks up when your hips move on their own, bucking into her fingers, desperately seeking pleasure that youâve abstained from for so long; it electrifies the pit of your gut, your jaw slackening when a curious finger inches down until it reaches your leaking entrance.Â
Okay? She asks quietly, and you nod earnestly. Please, baby, please, you beseech, walls hugging around the tip of her finger. Sheâs slow as she stretches you, gasping at the feel of you choking her lone digit, her hips twisting down into the cushion of the couch for friction. Pride grows hot in your core whenever her thigh twitches, dragging her pussy against the couch at every ragged breath.Â
You hold a hand up to show her when she asks for help, arching your finger like a hook, and she follows wordlessly. Your head drops onto the couch when she grazes past that ridge that makes you see stars. You feel her smirk on your clit before she takes it in her mouth. Your lips part over every curse squeaked at the ceiling; itâs too much too fast, itâs sensitive, you canât breathe, but sheâs taking it, hitting right where you need, pressing all your fucking⊠Xbox buttonsâ
Ellieâs fucking messy; sheâs trying to replicate your efforts from last night: every spit-filled swirl of your tongue is now being thrown back onto you⊠in the best way. Sheâs a quick learner. Spit globs on your clit, mixes with the juices that build around your spasming hole while she whines like a bitch. Her mouth glistens in the darkness and your eyes cycle.Â
Wanna fuck you so baaad, what the fuck, she whines to herself over your cresting moans, begging for another, begging for her to reach deeper inside you. You feel so good, you taste so good, holy fuckinâ Christâ
Every word on your clit sends vibrations up to your ribcage, right in your chest where your heart pounds for her. The couch dips with her quick movements before you feel her breath on your cheeks, smell yourself on her, fingers still nudged inside you. Your eyes flutter open and a smile stretches, âHi.â You whisper.Â
She smacks a wet kiss on your cheek, âHi. Am I doing okay?â She twists her fingers against your nerves and you gasp, reply sharp. She hides her satisfied grin with another kiss on your cheek, and you canât even snap how you want to. Youâre desperate to tip, to reach that peak youâve neglected for so long, begging her please, baby, make me cum, in her ear, seducing her until her fingers dig deep inside you again.Â
You praise her between jumbled swears to the heavens, and she keens, whimpering into your neck when she feels how tight your walls get on her, pushing another finger past the tightness. Youâre mine, Itâs a promise and she groans into your neck, fucking you harder, Youâre mine, youâre fuckinâ mine, mâgonnacum! Your tongue unravels like thread and you lose focus on everything except the girl on top of you; you feel the forbidden words resting on the edges of your teeth and ready to spill, the ones you swore to never speak again; but still, the unfiltered emotions rush through your blood as euphoria spills onto her hand, dripping down to the couch.Â
E-El! Ffuuuck â oh, god I l â agh!Â
Your orgasm splatters thick all over your inner thighs, coating her fingers in white as she works you; you feel her smiling even as your brain wracks, she likes this⊠Maybe sheâs not a fucking bottom. Your ears ring while a speckle of drool dribbles from your chin; she licks it up before kissing you, moans trading between both your mouths, your taste coating your tongue. Itâs not until her thumb traces your clit again that your legs slam shut on her. She snickers darkly into the kiss and fights against the muscles in your legs.Â
Iâm not fuckinâ done, gimme this pussy, she grits over your protests; tries to nudge her fingers even deeper inside you, but sheâs struggling; youâre winded up so tight. How are you still cumming this fucking hard? You grab her wrist as tight as you can, and she scoffs, letting up.Â
âFine. Meanie.â One last press to your mouth and sheâs up, sitting on her knees while you whither, trying to fucking recover whatever strength you preserved⊠None.
You muffle into the pillow, âEllie, what the fuckââ
Your slurs are cut with concern, a gentle hand on your thigh. For the first time, sheâs not freezing, âWait, are you okay? I thoughââ
You send her a shaky thumbs up, âIâm good, baby, just⊠fuckââ
âOh, okayâŠâ A moment of pause, âCan we scissor now?âÂ
âCan I fucking breathe!â
âYou can breathe after! Câmon, U-Haul lesbian!â She pats your ass excitedly.Â
âAfter Hot Topic. I need shirts.âÂ
âNuh uh,â A kiss against your knee⊠up to your thigh, on your waist. âWanânit now.âÂ
âUnhand me, hooligan â ow!â You squeak when teeth sink into your side. Ellie sighs in dissatisfaction, but she lets you go.Â
With one last wet kiss on your cheek, of course.Â
Hot Topic has lost their entire mind. $15 for a ring set? You almost convinced Ellie to steal them but she said getting caught wasnât worth it.Â
She did buy two new Spidey-man shirts, though⊠For a whopping $45. Geek. Bring. Back. Stealing.Â
After ranting about price spikes to the cashier, you and Ellie barely make it three skips down the strip before your eyes catch a glowing, maroon sign. You yank Ellie back before she can continue down, a villainous smirk glued to your face.Â
âOh, Ellliiieee,â you sing.
She spins, âHm?â Your lower lips traps between your teeth, an arm holding her tight against you. She stiffens at your hushed proposal, fingers clenching around your hand.Â
âYou ever been to 9M Sex?âÂ
You hear her swallow before a shuddering exhale.Â
âThatâs not very subtle, is it?â She mumbles and you cackle.Â
âSo⊠what do you think?â You say, voice laced with seduction.Â
Ellie refuses to make eye contact. Sheâll die and rot if she does; her corpse will be infested with grime and maggots in the next twenty-seconds. She wonât look at you⊠or the twenty-inch, plastic-wrapped dildo held between your legs.Â
She burns where she stands; how is the carpet not sizzling into flames from beneath her?Â
â⊠I dunno.â Ellie mutters; She does know. Knows that youâve been testing her since you stepped foot into this demonic space. Youâre a succubus with violent intentions with every grip on her waist, every whimsy confession you throw in her direction after eyeing the lecherous items on display.Â
I wanna use that on you⊠You whisper when you pass every vibrator imaginable, Youâd look so cute in this, baby⊠as you point at a fucking maid costume, I wish I could touch you right hereâŠÂ
Itâs embarrassing how badly she wants you to. It wouldnât take much convincing to lure her behind one of these lingerie racks and pull her underwear to the side with your tongue down her throat⊠again, she swears it. One more salacious twinkle from those brown eyes, and sheâs all yours, whenever, wherever. Anyway you want her until youâre satiated. The rush you give her is intoxicating.Â
âOh, câmon! Itâs fuckinâ funny! How the fuck would this fit in somebody!â
âIâm sure theyâd make it work,â Ellie cringes at how high her voice sounds. What the fuck is she, twelve? Closeted all over again?Â
You throw the⊠cock over your shoulder like deadweight, and Ellie blushes. Sheâs oddly endeared at your shamelessness; Itâs very reminiscent of when you two first met⊠Why does that feel like a lifetime ago?
Light is beaming off you, and Ellie canât get enough. This is the happiest sheâs seen you since youâve reconnected; youâre goofy and loud and full of color, completely unapologetic⊠Is it wrong to say that sheâs envious? Sheâs never met a person so⊠secure. The store is nearly empty, but she canât help but think that youâd act the exact same if it were stacked to the ceiling with people, parading around with your fluffy handcuffs and cat ears to match with a smile that glows for miles.Â
Ellie would give anything to have that⊠The ability to dismiss conformity. Leaving her home is still a journey for her. Sheâs forced out of her own thoughts by your gasp, âEllie⊠oh my fucking godâŠâÂ
âWhatâs the matter?âÂ
â⊠Turn around right now.â She follows your line of vision and nearly passes out... Thereâs absolutely no fucking way. An eggplant⊠but silicone⊠With an adjustable strap? No fucking subtly. Ellie can hear the rusty, unoiled, screws in your brain churning, conjuring up something absolutely disgusting⊠Her spine tingles.Â
âBabeâŠâÂ
âYâknow weâre buyinâ that, right?â Your lips are at the shell of her ear, voice alluring. âI refuse to leave without it.âÂ
Ellie gawks at that phallic vegetable; Why is it so fucking big? âIâm not having that shit on my card history.âÂ
âCâmon, suga mama. Get us somethinâ specialâŠâ Her spine quakes at your purr, âDonât you wanna fuck me⊠Ms. Bottom?â She can hear the smile, and her teeth grit so tight, bound to snap.Â
Ellie whips around with a snippy voice, âIâm not a fuckinâ â â Her eyes travel to ensure your seclusion, âIâm not a bottom. I told you thatââ
Your hands cover your ears, âBlah, blah, blah! Lalalalaââ
âYouâre pissing me offââ
âGet that eggplant and show me how much.â Youâre sinful with the low airiness of your tone. âIâll do whatever you want.âÂ
âLiar.â Her entire body gusts into flames. You pout and shake your head, âI mean it! Take care of me with the best root vegetable, mama.âÂ
âYouâre insaneâŠâÂ
Your brow arches, âMaybe so. Iâll make sure to use a coupon. Ainât nothinâ like 40% off a nut.â You waltz past her without a care in the world, throwing all your supplies on the counter like theyâre groceries. Even threw the cashier the sweetest wonderful weather weâre having, ainât it!
Ellie swiped her card with her eyes glued to the floor, shoving the receipt that read have a sex-filled day! to the bottom of the bag.Â
The air in Ellieâs home feels heavy.Â
Your eyes are locked onto her. Her back is to you where she squats on the floor, refilling Pickleâs food bowl with salmon pĂąte while you rest on her sofa. She can feel the intensity of your gaze through her jacket; it scorches her bones and leaves cracks in the marrow wherever they travel, goosebumps rising on her skin.Â
Neither of you have said much since returning home â particularly due to Ellie being intimidated by your sudden calmness. The energy youâre radiating has flipped completely, and itâs only been an hour; The second you picked up your sex shop bag from the service counter and climbed into the passenger seat, you went docile, zoned in on every movement she made with floaty pupils. Sheâs still shocked you didnât start undressing in the car.Â
Ellie gives Pickle one last kiss before standing, cringing at the pops from her knees. Youâre sitting on the crack of the cushions with your legs crossed, hands politely folded and resting on the point of your knee. Your eyes remind her of clouds, plush and delicate.Â
âWhat.â She rasps. You merely shake your head, âI canât look?â You ask, eyes glossing. Hers match, crystallizing like diamonds in the dirt, âDo what you want. Iâm gonna shower.â Ellieâs legs move with the pounding in her chest, halting when you say
âIâm coming with you.âÂ
âThatâs fine,â She rushes. Itâs not fine. Her bodyâs going to give out. It almost does when you frolic past her, the carve in your now bare back on full display, discarded Hot Topic shirt in hand when you push the bathroom door open.Â
She follows like a dog. A wolf. Sheâs so fucking hungry.Â
Steaming water beats down on both of you like rainfall as your mouths meld together, swallowing every sigh, every desperate whimper. But still, your arms stay pinned behind your back. Ellieâs tried everything: sucked at your throat, gripped your ass in her palms, licked up your neck, but you wonât fucking touch her. Sheâs dripping for you, aching for your hands to caress her; she thought pressing herself tight against your body would finally get you to crack, but youâre stone. Tough as brick. Completely unreceptive.Â
She knows what youâre doing⊠You know what youâre doing, and your attitude is driving her up a wall. Your egoâs fucking huge, thatâs for sure.
All this over Ellie enjoying bottoming; Sheâs not a fucking bottom, she likes to bottom, to be taken care of; thereâs a difference. Itâs not her fault youâve perfected your craft; Your touch is addictive; every nerve underneath her skin vibrates whenever you glance in her direction, let alone touch her.Â
When your lips reconnect, itâs harsh. Ellieâs bothered to say the least, and you try not to smile. Your giddy laughter is swallowed by her when she traps you against the cold, wet wall, your back barely arching away from it before she holds you down, attacks your neck with precision. Your thighs squeeze together with each suction on your skin, hips pushing down onto the thigh thatâs pressed tight between yours.Â
âI fuckinâ hate youââ She spits in your ear. Your grin is pageant-ready.Â
âDoesnât look like it, bottomââ
A heavy, veiny hand cracks on your thigh, and you squeak, âJust admit it! Itâs not a bad thingââÂ
âI know itâs not. Iâm not that, though.âÂ
âOkay, baby.âÂ
âShut up. Turn around.â You teasingly kiss her chin before twirling like youâre on ice, cheek smashed against the wall and ass sticking out for her, wrists bound by an invisible string at the end of your spine. Â
âI got some waterproof stuffââ
Be quiet, She snarls like you did on night one, and youâre silent. Ellie sucks the skin right under your ear and your leg kicks out slightly. Her curious fingers slip between your legs and are instantly coated in silk. Your weightless head falls onto her shoulder, sighing like an angel at the gentle flicks on your clit. Yeah? She whispers when you groan her name out, chest and ears beet red.Â
Yeah, baby, fuck, you treat me so good, You mumble back and she inhales deeply, walls jerking, Such a s-sweetie pie, The noise she makes in your ear is very reminiscent of a wounded animal, nasal and high. Her working wrist gets sloppy seconds after, and your jaw slacks. Sheâs rushing, eager for you to cum, to make her dirty all over again.Â
Ellie loves how deep your voice gets when you fuck; dry and thick and melts her like butter, makes her dizzy. She would beg you to talk back if she wasnât on this fucking power trip; she wants you to shake under her. Humble you a bit. Y-Yeah? She croaks.Â
Ellieâs blanking; Sheâd planned to say so much when you pulled her into the muggy space by the chain around her neck, but she canât fucking think. You smell so fucking good and your skin is soft as cotton.Â
F-Fuck yes, oh f â uck â
A nasty grin grows on Ellieâs face when your legs start to wobble, hips arching off hers to get her fingers closer to your pussy.Â
Uh huh, She hums, squeezing your wrist in her stagnant hand and forcing it around until it rests over your pussy, hold it open for me. Your hips buck back harsher than she anticipates; Ellie barely catches herself, forced to hold you up, trapped completely between her and the wall, fingers attacking your well-exposed clit. Her tongue swirls on your neck as you ride her hand; She wishes she could see your face properly, take in the way your lashes flutter right before your peak crashes into you, how the brown in your eyes cascade into darkness, full of lust.Â
Itâs her favorite part; how your moans pitch as your walls squeeze in one tight pull. They spasm in harsh twitches as your clit jounces; Ellie feasts on every single quivery alert of your orgasm, boasts in silence after each exclamation of Ellie, Ellie, oh, fuck!
Sheâs officially made you cum twice. Four more out of you, and you're fair game. Her stomach twists as she holds you down; Youâre so loud and she loves it, that satisfied twinge in your voice at its peak. Ellieâs arm is tight around your waist; Thereâs so much pressure where she whisks your clit, lips closing around her two fingers.Â
A tight hand closes around her wrist when you beg her to stop, Okay, babe, fuck fuuuâ ah! â
But she doesnât let up; rubs you faster, spits nastily in your ear, Say youâre sorry, she gravels onto your cheek, Make it good, too.Â
Ca â El â uhhh! â
Yeah? Want some more? Tell Ellie how sorry you are.Â
Fuckfuckfuck â I-Iâm â Oh god, Iâm sorryIâmsorrybabyâ
Ellie feels merciful and drops her hand, and you go lax against her. Sheâs forced to smash her body against yours so you donât drop to the floor. She lets you ride out your aftershocks, the last bits of cloud nine, lips pressing into your shoulder.Â
Your panting eventually slows, âEllieâŠâÂ
âHm.âÂ
âI hope you knowâŠâ you scratch, â⊠that Iâm boutta fuck the living shit outta you.âÂ
She kisses your shoulder before scoffing with an arched brow.Â
âOkay.â
Ellieâs choices in room dĂ©cor never fail to amaze you. Sheâs so endearing.Â
Her adult room seems much more lived in; some clothes scattered on the floor and slung over her black love seat, laundry baskets, open drawers with neatly folded clothes⊠so many mirrors. Thereâs one by her nightstand, two small, circular ones stood on her dresser, two full-body ones by her window. You can see yourself in every direction you turn. Her walls are made with black brick and littered with green and yellow fairy lights, draped decorative leaves surrounding her Spider-Man(Toby McGuire and Miles Morales) tapestries. Multiple black, furry rugs cover the floor. And the posters⊠Bless her heart. Youâve never seen so many constellations and planets on one wall, let alone four. Her bed is so messy, though. Her poor stuffies are face-down. Itâs a crime how fucking adorable she is; Your heart is jumping for joy.Â
âYou donât make your bed?â You ask slyly.Â
She pauses her towel-wrapping, â⊠For what.âÂ
âUm, for tidiness. Aesthetic, if you will.â Â
She blinks at you, âThatâs dumb as fuck. Youâre gonna lay in it anyway. I want a kiss.â She walks towards you and steals one⊠and another, and another until youâre both smiling. Your arms interlace around the back of her neck.Â
âMake your bed or Iâm snitchin.â Your whisper is followed by a peck.Â
âSnitchinâ to who?âÂ
âP-Papa Miller.âÂ
âDonât talk about him when Iâm horny.âÂ
She unravels your towel and lets it drop to the floor, âS⊠Sorry.âÂ
âYouâre not forgiven. Lay down.âÂ
You sit on her bed like a cat scoping the scenery, âOr what? Gonna hit me? In my face?â You purr.Â
She rests her hands on your knees, bending her spine to kiss you, âMaybe.âÂ
âNo balls.â
She smiles and smooches your nose, âYouâre right. I would never.âÂ
âWhat if I want you to.âÂ
She scoffs and stands upright, âIâm not⊠fucking hitting youââ
âWhat if I ask politelyâŠâ You deepen your voice mockingly, and she shudders, âOh, Ellie Williams, my dearest flower, may you do me the honor of bruisinâ my cheek with an affectionate handprint?âÂ
âDudeââ
âYou donât have to⊠but if you wanna, Iâm not opposed.â You fall back onto your arched elbows, knees pulled high in the air. Ellieâs stare is disgustingly enticing as her eyes travel from yours, all the way down to your calves, but she makes no moves. You love how patient she is.Â
âYour hands are so fuckinâ nice.âÂ
She snorts and looks down at them, squeezing a tight fist and inspecting the blue-green veins. âThey are? They donât feel dry?âÂ
âI love how cracked they are. Scratch me up, papĂ.âÂ
Ellieâs nose turns up as her ears glow, feigning disgust, âShut up.âÂ
You smirk and your thighs separate, inch by inch, gooey lines of slick snapping when your pussyâs on display, âMake me.â She swallows. Ellie decides her hair has dried enough, shaking the towel from her head and crawling on top of you in seconds. Her mouth mushes against yours; Her aggression is so delicate. Her lips stroke yours until they dust your cheeks, down to your temples. You eye the neon glow-in-the-dark stickers on her ceiling, âGonna fuck me under the moon, space ranger?â She licks over your mumbles, nibbling at your lips. âM-MaybeâŠâÂ
âHavinâ second thoughts, bottom?â You poke and her jaw tenses.
âPut your fuckinâ leg up.âÂ
You oblige, flattening the other so she can straddle your lax thigh, âGoinâ back to our roots, I see. Traditional lesbianism.â You sigh when her dripping pussy hovers over yours. Ellie has the prettiest cunt; Youâve told her probably a thousand times, now, but fuck, itâs perfect: soft strands of hair submerged in slick, plush lips surrounding her red clit. Your pussy flutters like sheâs crushing whenever Ellie finds her balance on top. She fits her shoulder in the arch of your calf, and youâre patient, dragging a light fingertip around her areola. Her tongue wets her lips before she closes the space between your pussies. The muscles in your thighs clench at your intertwined warmth.Â
Ellie holds your gaze, forest shiny with arousal with a hand gripping your raised thigh.Â
âSend me to the stars, space ranger.âÂ
She chokes a laugh before kissing your ankle, âYouâre cute.âÂ
âNo, you,â you cheese. Her smile matches yours before she experiments, finds comfortable seating on your lap before her hips grind forward, just barely. Her maneuvers are shy, a bit unsteady, but sheâs entrancing; Ellieâs face is perfect⊠Have you ever told her how beautiful she is?Â
A trembling whisper from her, Whyâre you looking at me like that? shows that you havenât, not nearly enough, at least. Astonishment settles in your vision; Youâre stunned to silence by her. Breaths leave ragged through your nose, eyes trailing over every inch of her face; the curvature of her nose, every pore, every scratch and scar. Sheâs an image, a neglected picture that deserves all notoriety. To be hung in ancient museums; A modern Mona Lisa.Â
EllieâŠÂ
Mhm?Â
I really like youâŠÂ
Sheâs motivated, hips pushing forward and back, pressing down, as tight as she can get the gap. H-How much?Â
Too much, and itâs a fact. A terrifying one that you canât ignore. She moans in response and holds the hand that rests on her hip as she rides you, the cup of her breasts jumping, the remainder of shower water mixing with fresh bubbles of sweat in between the valley, glistening under the last bits of sunset. Tell me, tell me, she begs and moves faster, and your heart rate skyrockets, from nerves, fromâŠÂ
You're perfect, y-youâre soâ Her mattress springs wheeze under the sudden pace of her thrusts. Your whimpers seem to drive her, I missed you so much. Youâll never fail to remind her; shame on you if she ever forgets. Wetness squelches between your bodies, the friction sparking the wires in your spleen, back arching with every catch of her clit on yours.Â
Stay with m-me, Her voice breaks, and your hand is numb from how hard she grips it, Donât⊠donât go⊠I like when youâre close to me⊠Your eyes attempt to close, but you canât allow it. You drink in every inch of her, and you burn warmer when she does the same, always returning to your eyes before beginning again.Â
Youâre gonna make me cum, She gasps brokenly, disappointed. Youâre begging now, for every drop she has. You want all of it; the claws that sink into her are desperate when her head falls back, her nipples tighten, her pleasure racking off the walls. Your hips buck into hers and she squeals, tries her hardest to keep her balance, but sheâs cracking. You feel her throbbing, can almost make out her heart pounding over yours; sheâs warning you, sheâs right there, and the incoming destruction is evident in her voice.Â
Her cry is long and drawn as her clit beats, blush burning in her cheeks as she scrapes at your skin, pulls at your fingers to center as she transports to euphoria. Tears jerk in your eyes when you hear her confession, heart shattering in your chest as darkness takes over you; itâs disgraceful how youâre silent as she lays everything out for you to take. You cry in silence as she rides out everything she deserves.Â
I love you⊠Don't leave me⊠I love you, baby, I-I love youâŠÂ
Inhale⊠Exhale⊠Inhale⊠ExhaleâŠÂ
You count how many seconds it takes for Ellie to breathe. Sheâs sound asleep with her back to your chest, her arms outstretched in front of her. Your arm rests over her hip as you welcome every waft of her citrus shampoo. Itâs doing wonders pausing your incoming breakdown. Youâre so, so sick.Â
I love you⊠Donât leave meâŠÂ
It replays in your mind against your will. Over and over, it bounces around your skull until your temples pound. Youâre not sure whatâs more nauseating: the word she used or that she meant it. You could see it in her eyes, promises of adherence, careless and unbound yearning and devotion. Youâre to blame, though. You practically pulled it out of her after your own declaration; I really like you⊠What an idiot.Â
You admire her in every possible way. Her bravery, in particular.Â
You donât deserve to be in her presence, but still, you rob her of time. She showers without you present, and you desperately wait for return so you can hold her again. Sheâs scared that youâll leave her when it should be the other way around; Itâs been your only fear: her realizing that she deserves everything you arenât. Someone happy, pure-hearted, successful, just like she is.Â
Whatever attracts her to you must be an unimaginable pity. How could she love someone as manipulative and slimy as you? Itâs unfathomable.Â
And yet, you still lay next to her, under her stars.Â
You separate from her as slyly as you can to sit on the edge of her bed, palms digging into your eyes before purring erupts from behind you. You feel nuzzles against your back and you snicker; Pickleâs a vessel of comfort. She never fails to appear when you're in dire need. Sheâs beckoned over with soft clicks of your tongue, taking refuge on your lap and licking at your thigh. Your lips mash against her little head, peppering kiss after kiss until leaps onto the floor, exiting the room and moving down the hall. You use kit-kat as an escape even if your heart aches to be near Ellie.Â
The journey to her living room is slow due to you examining the framed pictures on the wall. Some are photos of just her, while others are her and other nameless people you donât recognize, all smiling wide. Sheâs being hugged and kissed on her cheek by presumed friends â maybe family â all while holding the camera in her shaky hands, thanks to the blurred image. Thereâs photos of her on vacation, on beaches, photos of fireworks and birthday cakes, and so many photos of her father.Â
Thereâs so much light in this hallway, even in void night, and sheâs in the center of it. You canât stop crying.Â
Your body drags to the couch to retrieve your discarded backpack, digging for your phone. You havenât touched it since youâve been here, and youâre shocked to see that itâs still charged. The influx of missed calls frightens you; theyâre all from work. You rush to listen to your last voicemail.Â
âHey, sweetheart! Itâs Professor Meyers! Professor Rosnonâs been trying to get in contact with you, so I thought Iâd reach out, as well. Weâve got an amazing offer for you if youâre interested! Itâs too much to describe on the phone, so I hope we can meet up in person very soon and discuss the details. Get back to me as soon as you can. Enjoy the rest of your vacation, buh-bye!âÂ
That was yesterday morning. Fuck your life.Â
Your sketchbook stares back with impertinence as your tears dry; Itâs been months and still nothing from your imagination has transferred onto paper. Why do you continue to disappoint yourself, staring at a blank page with your pen in hand?Â
âH-Hey.âÂ
You donât react to Ellieâs call, just continue to tap your pen on the edge of your book. You canât stop thinking about her hands. She appears from behind the couch wrapped in her Princess Bubblegum blanket, scratching at her nose.Â
âI was coldâŠâ She mutters with a soft laugh, âHow do you stay so warm?â You merely shrug, tongue tied in indestructible knots.Â
âCan I sit?â Your head jerks and sheâs next to you in seconds, kissing your cheek, then your shoulder.
âWhatâs the matter, baby?â She whispers against your skin, and you sigh.Â
âJust girly things,â You chuckle darkly before bluntly asking, âAre you mad at me?âÂ
âNo â what?â Her voice is as delicate as rose petals, âWhy would I be mad?âÂ
âI didnât say it back.â You say.Â
â⊠Say what back.âÂ
âYou told me you loved me and I didnât say it back. I didnât⊠say it. I dunno why I didnât!âÂ
She stares incredulously, âItâs⊠Thatâs fineââ
Your book goes flying into the cushion before you stand, âEllie, itâs not fuckinâ fine! None of this is fine! I donât know if itâll ever be fine! Iâm not⊠Iâm not fine.â You exasperate, âAm I⊠I canât stop⊠overthinking everything! I wanna makeâŠâ You sob and pace.Â
âI want you happy. You deserve⊠aaalll the good shit that life has to offer!â Your arms flail, âYouâre so⊠I canât fucking think when you look at me! All my brain cells fucking explode and I never wanna look away! I just wanna sit and stare at your fucking face all day long! Fuck working, fuck a mortgage, fuck â fuck everything! Life is fuckinâ dumb and pointless if your not in the center of it! Iâm soââÂ
âI love you.â She whispers, water in her eyes.Â
âI canât⊠accept thatââ
âMe loving you?âÂ
âYes! Well⊠noââ
âSo you want me to love you?âÂ
âEllie, please, I canât fuckinâ⊠breatheââ
âYes, you can. And Iâm so in love with you,â She says with certainty, and somehow, your brain convinces you that itâs conniving. âI was in love when I left⊠and Iâm still in love now. You make me so⊠excited about life.â She continues mutedly, âIf you donât⊠wanna stay, I understand. But I had to tell you anyway.âÂ
âIâŠâ You wail with knuckles in your eyes, âI love you so muchâŠâ Ellieâs sighs in relief at your cry. She chuckles wetly before you feel her arms around you, âYouâre such a fuckinâ lesbian, itâs actually hilarious.âÂ
âFuck off!â You holler into her shoulder, âThis is your fault! Why are you so perfect! Fucking⊠fucking bitchââ
âSay you love me again,â she pleads into your sweatshirt, and you repeat it like a prayer. I love you, I love you, I love you so much! Ellie rocks back and forth where you stand, a delicate, scratchy hand rubbing your back under the cloth.Â
You're back in Ellieâs room. Your pen is moving. On paper.Â
When Ellie ushered you to bring your sketchbook to bed, you couldnât stop laughing; continuously questioned your ability, trying to convince her how pointless that would be, but that gentle encouragement in her gaze got you here: on another blank fucking page with an exhausted pen. You hate lesbians.Â
The lines on the sheet are subtle, gently grazed across white with little focus; The image isnât super descriptive, but itâs shapely. It looks like⊠something; Thatâs all you need right now. Ellieâs watching curiously, eyes flickering between your busy hand and the slowly filling sheet.Â
âPretty.â She says.Â
You snort, âItâs literally a blob.âÂ
âTo you. Art is subjective.â Your eyes roll before they land on Pickle resting on Ellieâs throw pillow. âWhat, you hate it, too?âÂ
âDonât do that! She loves it!âÂ
âLook at her eyes! Nothinâ but homophobia!â Ellie nudges your knee with hers in disapproval, and Pickle blinks.Â
âBe quiet. Keep doing that.â She nods down at your paper, and you smirk. âYeah, baby? Like when I do that?â You hold her faltering stare and scribble blindly, âItâs gettinâ you there?âÂ
Her cheeks grow plump and shine, almost reaching her eyes, âStop⊠or no more kisses.âÂ
Your jaw slacks, âYou wouldnât dare!âÂ
âI would! Câmon, finish for me â â Your body crashes with laughter at the innuendo, and Ellie cringes.Â
âCan you focus for two seconds!â She scolds between your cackles.Â
âIâm so â sorry, itâs just too good, holy fuckââ
âIt wasnât that funny.â She says blankly.Â
âTo you! Comedyâs subjectiââÂ
Ellie holds you down by your hips before jumping into your lap, glare sizzling past your teary eyes.Â
âOooh, la la, quite the dejavu moment.â You snicker up at her, book and pen forgotten.Â
âAm I a joke to you?âÂ
Your brow curves scoffingly, âMight be. And what about it?âÂ
âI think you needa break.âÂ
âWord?â You toss your pen and book with the quickness, âWhat we doinâ, space ranger?âÂ
âYouâre not doing anything. Iâm gonna ride your cock.âÂ
Your eyes turn to globes as she undresses herself above you, throwing her tee and maneuvering so she can kick her underwear over the bed, only clad in her fuzzy Saturn socks.Â
âWhereâs the bag.âÂ
â⊠O-Over there,â You point where you threw it mindlessly after your couch escapades, and Ellieâs up to retrieve it. You eye the dip of her back and gawk at her fucking ass when she bends over to rummage through the bag. âAre⊠are you serious right now?âÂ
âYup. Take your clothes off.â She calls back plainly.Â
â⊠Alright.â You unclothe into your boyshorts in stunned silence. Since when is she this bold? She returns with full hands: cotton candy flavored lube, a small bullet, and the longest fucking eggplant youâve ever seen in your lifetime. She throws them onto the mattress carelessly with a shrug, âI think you need some inspo. Am I the best girlfriend?âÂ
Your heart jerks in your chest, veins reaching out for her â⊠âCourse, baby⊠shit.âÂ
Ellie holds up the strap by the leg adjustment, âIâm sure you know how to put this on.â She throws it into your lap before popping open the baby blue lubricant. Your face burns when you swing your legs over the bed to pull the harness up your legs. You can hear her giggling as the aubergine jumps up and down above your pussy. She offers to help and you instruct her through tightening the bands until they fit snug around your hips and thighs.Â
Your brainâs in overdrive; the curved girth of the silicone builds arousal in your underwear, envisioning Ellieâs plush walls stretching and pulsing around the purple length, her creamy silk building around the perimeter of the green tip at the base. Your clit leaps beneath the fabric.Â
âAre you⊠You want some head? Like⊠before this?â Your fingers point at the eggplant. Ellie shakes her head with the bullet in hand.Â
âJust lay down.âÂ
âEllieââ
Her hands clasp your steaming cheeks, her lips brushing against yours when she murmurs, shhh⊠take good care of me? Your heart flutters where it sits in her hands, Donât I always? You choke, and she hums with a smirk before her lips curl against yours. Poking fun at her for being a bottom is long gone; This is the most sure youâve ever seen her in this setting. Youâre often the hand that guides, lures her in, eases the unwanted tension and leads you both to gratification, but now sheâs doing that for you; her tongue slides over your mouth one last time before balancing herself on the edge of the bed and dropping to her knees, eyes lined up with the fat tip of the toy.Â
Oh ⊠Oh.Â
Youâre one of the most⊠talented people I know. She flatters, so lustful and genuine. I know that side of you is still in there. Itâs all gonna come back to you⊠Mâ just gonna help.Â
Is this your proposal of being my muse? You quirk. She shrugs, her hand closing tight around the length, Could be. Depends on how good you think I do.Â
Always do so good, You acclaim, I love you⊠fuckâ
Ellie kisses the tip before purring, I love you more⊠Anyone ever do this to you?Â
⊠Is this a trick question? Uhh⊠Like⊠like, one time. Despite your doubts, you choose honesty. The memory is lackluster and quick. It was decent enough. Merely for experimenting purposes.Â
The twinkles in her eyes catch flame, Whatâd you like about it. She asks, but itâs not a question; itâs sharp, and you almost start crying.Â
I-I dunnoâ
Before you can lie, a glob of spit lands all over the head. The glare she sends you is both icy and hot as she massages in the wetness, gliding it all over. Your knees buckle under your weight, and she leers up at you. You like it like that? Niceân sloppy?Â
Youâve had⊠so much sex in your life, and never once, in the history of the universe, have you ever been this fucking wet. If you were to go on a casual midnight stroll right now, sloshy noises would echo from between your legs for miles. The glint in her eye is knowing, and spit gathers all over her tongue as it swirls around the tip. The sounds her lips make are sinister; your chest concaves in a wheeze.Â
When the tip slides a hair deeper on her tongue, you choke a pained noise. She releases the tip when your body stutters again. She says nothing, simply shoves you down onto the bed by your thighs, planting herself in between them once more. Thereâs so much fucking spit; it slides down in droplets all over the sides of the silicone as she slobbers on the crown, preps it for when it slides down her throat. Her mussed blankets are clenched between your fingers; your breathing is ragged.Â
Such a good fuckinâ girl, Your tongue swells, and Ellie keens, eyes sparkling underneath stray auburn when they flutter at your praise. Your cramped fingers brush the strands away before knotting in her hair. The bun at the back of her head slowly loosens, trapping your digits in her locks. A soft whimper leaves her when you pull.Â
For some reason, your eyes travel, only for a second, but youâre met with an elongated image of Ellieâs dotted spine, the goosebumps on her skin, the way her head bobs half an inch at a time, all in her full body mirror. You choke on a whine, and the muscles in Ellieâs back twitch.Â
Oh my fuckinâ god, Your fingers tighten in her tresses and she whines, the arch in her back deepening. Your walls pulsate when you catch the glistens of slick spilling from her entrance at your sounds, both holes clamping down, pleading for you. Gonna let me fuck that pretty throat?Â
Her moans are sloppy and wet. Her head bows, and you know sheâs taking you deeper, nails digging into your thighs. Itâs a curse that you canât feel the tightness of her sunken cheeks. She pops off you, desperation leaking from her when whines, Fuck my mouth, baby, please, lips gliding all over the underside. You move on autopilot, sliding up further onto the mattress, feet planted on the floor and hips hanging off the edge of the bed. Ellieâs nasty; practically making out with your tip while you stabilize your position. Itâs fucking messy, how her saliva drips down the base until it meets the harness, small beads building on your bare thigh.Â
Stick your tongue out, you order before squeezing her face in your free palm. Her pink muscle lulls until it lays on the connective skin between your thumb and index, coated in drool. Itâs not enough for you, though; Saliva builds in your mouth before it shoots onto hers, and she moans when it splatters all over her tongue, speckles landing on her cheek. A heavy hand comes down to pat her cheek, and she cries a quiet I love you. You smile and itâs dark, Uh huh, love you, too. Keep it out, your thumb drags on her bottom lip until her tongue rests flat over her bottom teeth.Â
The hand that twines in her hair is harsh, Hands behind your back, you say and she does without questioning. You kiss her cheek before guiding her head steady towards the tip until it sits on her tongue. Her jaw widens when your hips rise off the mattress; you hold her still an inch forward, her mouth closing around the wrist. Her noises are quiet and docile, and she swallows; You shudder when you watch her throat close before pulling out.Â
Okay? Want more?Â
Her eyes plead like a puppyâs, tongue cycling on the prong. Breathe through your nose, Your hand loosens a bit in her hair, Just pull off when you wanna stop, okay, baby?Â
One whine of approval and youâre pushing in again; Her hips twitch in the mirror as her mouth fills and you snicker; her thighs are coated in slick, a thin line dripping onto her furry rug. Thatâs my girl, fuck, youâre so cute, You grit and her fingers clench. The pace of your hips kick up slightly, testing to see how much she can take. You monitor her every move: the way her eyes float empty in her skull when her cheeks expand, how her breathing quickens when your thumb caresses her scalp, how tight her throat gets when you push too deep.Â
Look at how wet that pussy is, Ellie moans over your thrusts. Slobber coats her lips and chin; dribbles all the way down to her chest. Your bottom lip traps between your teeth.Â
You plunge too deep apparently; she gags and pulls off and explodes into a fit of coughs, forehead falling onto your thigh as she heaves. You kiss her head and apologize franticallyâŠÂ
And then, she starts giggling.Â
âFuck â Fuck, Iâm sorry ââ
She snorts and coughs some more, and youâre stuck. You hold both of her sizzling cheeks in your hands and kiss all over her face. âIâm sorry, Iâm sorry ââ
âYouâre really hot.â Her voice is croaky and broken and more slick gushes from you. How shameful.Â
âMe?! Are you fucking â are you okay?âÂ
âMhm.â She hums before pecking your lips, âFuck me now? Iâm⊠Iâm so wet,â She whispers like she told you something secretive. You can bet every minuscule dollar you own that youâre wetter, but anxiety settles in your stomach. Your girlâs asking you to fuck the daylights out of her after nearly killing her with the fucking dick-shaped vegetable on your waist, and youâre panicking.Â
âEllie, Iâm scared as fuck, not even gonâ lieââ
âNothing to be scared of. I trust you.â Another kiss before she mutters, âTake care of me?âÂ
âP-Promise.â
Your mind rushes.Â
The past twenty minutes have felt like a blur; you hardly recall pinning Ellie down on the mattress to keep her still while your tongue swirled inside her, how tight her walls clamped down on two fingers, how she scratched and squirted and squealed for you to fuck her.Â
And now sheâs beneath you, hips twirling up, desperate for friction as her nails tear at your hips, but you ignore her. Youâre gawking at the lubricated strap that rests on her throbbing cunt, how the inches almost touch her belly button. Youâre trapped in a daze as your hips move mindlessly, brows furrowed.Â
W-Whatâs the matter, baby? She keens at you.Â
Nothinâ Youâre gruff, Thinking.Â
And you are thinking⊠about how Ellieâs going to take this shit. The length is concerning on itâs own, but itâs so fucking wide and curves up. You recall the amount of times sheâs winced when you fingered her. It should worry you; how far sheâs going to stretch to take it all, how much her softness is going to resist against something so big. Your head is twisted where it wanders; conjures up disgusting visuals of her begging you to split her open, to make her take it, to give it to her as mean as you can. You canât help it, though; Sheâs an angel when she cries.Â
Agitation creases in her brows, âGimme itââ
âI think itâs gonna hurt,â You slur. Her taste swirls on your tongue when you speak, and it makes you wetter.Â
âI donât care. Give it to me,â she snaps. âWant you⊠insideââ
Your brow flits, âWant me inside? Iâve been inside. A lot, actually.â
âDonât fuck with me right now.âÂ
âEllie, câmon! Look at this shit! Thereâs no wayââÂ
âIâm lying here telling you to do it! Fucking ââ She sighs in annoyance, âLet me get on top. You werenât supposed to do shit anyway.âÂ
âEllie!ââ
âStop talking and lay the fuck down!âÂ
You plop down onto your back with a slew of curses, and Ellie takes â snatches the reins from you; she leaps into your lap, lube in hand, scolding sizzling on her tongue.Â
âI donât wanna hear shit. Just⊠let me do it.âÂ
A cheesy smile grows, â⊠Youâre not you when youâre hornyââ
âWhat the fuck did I just say!â She squirts more fluorescent blue into her palm and blindly massages it into your strap. Itâs horribly messy by the time sheâs done, taking it in her hand and lining herself up without warning.Â
â⊠Whaââ
Her non-lubed palm clamps on your mouth, silencing you with a hefty eye roll. Ellie arches a brow when you hold two thumbs up in silent encouragement. You love your girlfriend!Â
Ellie steadies herself with a mumbled, please, God, donât let me die, right above the tip before her hips drop not even an inch. Youâre a hawk the way you eye her tiny hole expanding around the girthy crown. Her breaths are heavy and ragged, but she takes her time; hips rising when sheâs taken too much, sinking when sheâs comfortable, and youâre hypnotized by it all.Â
Her hand drops from your mouth and plants on your chest when youâve finally quieted â besides the mumbles of ohmyfuckinggod when her lips manage to swallow up the tip. Her bottom lip bruises from her teeth, tears welling in her eyes and her thighs twitching. She looks like sheâs hurting and your heart shatters. Carnality be damned.Â
âE-Ellie⊠baby, we donât have toââ
Youâre so⊠fucking big, she squirms, and you stiffen.Â
Your nails latch â sink into her hips and your jaw slacks; gaping at how she struggles to take you, how she winces and gasps at the stretch until sheâs halfway. Youâre doing that to her, getting her nice and full; it takes all your strength to keep your hips flat on the bed despite every cell luring you to stuff her to the brim.Â
⊠It hurt?Â
I donât â know â fuck, Ellieâs eyes flit in every direction: locks onto the ceiling, the bed frame above you, your breasts and your dick. Ah, shit âÂ
Good? You confirm and she hums, whimpering to herself until her ass rests on your thighs. Any traces of dark purple are no longer visible, only hints of bright green glowing from the base of the harness.Â
You whistle lowly, Damn⊠youâre real as fuck.Â
Gimme a sec, She sighs, and you raise your palms, Whenever youâre ready.Â
The longer she sits, the more relaxed her face becomes; flush darkening on her cheeks and above her breasts, more slick ringing around the circumference.Â
⊠This is very interesting, Ellie says aloud, and shocked laughter bursts through your chest. Sheâs fucking hilarious, actually. Scale of one to ten? Your brows give a mischievous wiggle, and she pauses, hips moving around, testing the waters. Her eyelids bat gently.Â
⊠S-Seven ân a half? She moans, and you smirk, You sure? It looks like an eight to me.Â
She glares playfully, Gonna have to work for that rating.Â
You squint up at her before sitting upright, chest to chest, and her arms wrap around your neck for balance. Iâm waitinâ on the green light, you whisper against her lips. She laughs weakly, One star rating on Yelp. Too much back talk.Â
You kiss her around a smile before pecking all over her cheeks. She grabs the back of your neck to hold you still, melding her mouth on yours. You swallow her soft noises when your tongues intertwine, hands cupping her ass. Ellieâs jaw slacks when her hips raise and drop, gasping on your tongue. You lick into her mouth and hold her steady, nails deep in her soft skin when her pace quickens.Â
You grin, Yeah? Better?Â
Ellie nods and a hand slips between you, and you groan aloud when her fingers meet her slippery clit, the tips dripping wet in seconds as sloshing noises echo through her bedroom. Your arm wraps around her waist to yank her down, and she squeaks, back arching, chest shoving against yours. You done showinâ off? You grit against her cheek and she huffs. Ellieâs hands shove at your shoulders until youâre laying flat on the mattress, and you snicker. Her hold is strong on your chest as she bounces, her tits trembling every time she comes down.Â
The way she says your name is intoxicating; so drawn out and velvety and makes your cunt tremor. Your eyes trap on how she touches herself; one hand settled on your chest while the other rubs at her clit, pulls at her nipples, makes them shine with her juices. Youâre aching to touch her, but you stay put; let her have her fun.
You catch movement out the corner of your eye; Ellieâs trapped in another mirror off to the side, shrouded in pleasure: head thrown back while she cries at the ceiling, slurred flattery of how good you feel inside her igniting the flame in your core.Â
Look how good youâre takinâ that shit, you groan and the muscles in her ass squeeze in the mirror; you can feel the ripples in her cunt pulling at your strap, and it nearly sends you. What youâd give to feel her flesh choking around you when she breaks, succumbs to pleasure while you explode inside her. It enrages you to no end.Â
Your pupils meet at the bridge of your nose when a clammy hand inches up your chest to the column of your throat to rest. Ellie whines from above, a shaky C-Can I? You're about to make a mess all over her sheets. You hardly register the desperate bobs of your head, and her grip tightens around your neck. Pinches down on the sides, and your soul leaves your body.Â
You like that? She snickers dark around a moan and fucks down harder onto your lap, Youâre so fucking â holy, fuck â
Your hand clamps around her wrist and she squeezes harder; the hold is threatening, and your clit jumps. Your promises are wet and muffled; exclamations of mâyours melting on your tongue. Your girl is going to break you.Â
Her efforts eventually slow, and you know sheâs getting tired. You look up, right into her eyes and you nearly break. Theyâre pleading, imploring you to take care of me, make me cum for you; she eases into a steady grind, and the pressure from her hips add friction to your clit. You curse lowly, and she whimpers back. Youâre already so close from how long you held off, but you donât want to cum yet. Sheâs getting hers first.Â
E-Ellie, get upâ
You barely finish your command before she lifts up and off, strings of slick connecting her pussy and your dick together. Your maneuvers are quick; youâre up on your knees in seconds and grab her hips, guiding her until sheâs on all fours, facing all of the mirrors at the front of her room. Your mouth waters at the sight of both holes pulsing sporadically, begging for your cock.Â
Your hand deepens the arch in her spine until sheâs face down on a lone pillow. Your heart swells when Ellie extends a shaky hand to you, fingers curling tight around the hand that rests on her hip. You kiss her wrist and she sighs happily. You grab your slippery dick and line it up at her entrance; her hips push back when you nudge inside, wet gasps leaving her as you split her all over again; but this time, you can see it. Youâre moaning with her, a thin line of drool landing on her asscheek.Â
It hurt, baby? You grunt, stupid with lust, body on fire, Huh? She canât even talk, just shoves her face in the pillow and says your name, over and over. You push in deeper, and she groans, sobs, begs for you to fuck me, baby, fuck me fuck me fuck me, pleaseâ
Thatâs all it takes; your hands clutch tight on both hips to yank her back onto your cock. A shocked squeal rattles the four walls that enclose such filth when sheâs finally stuffed full: she spurs on your aggression, jumbled yesyesyess hitting the pillowcase, her nails sinking into your wrist. Your strokes are deep; you watch how tight she grips your dick, plush pink milking every inch that leaves when you pull out, desperate to keep you in place, a light rim of cream building around her lips.Â
You and Ellieâs teary eyes lock in the mirror on her dresser, her pink lips gaping around each crude praise she throws at you. Itâs music to your ears.
You hi â hit it so good, baby!Â
Just like that â oh, god, yeah! â
I love you so fuckinâ much!
Her messy hair flies in every direction, bounces with your thrusts, enticing you to grip it. Dark red wraps around your tight fist and you pull, and she goes stupid, eyes crossing in her skull and glossy drool hanging off the edge of her bottom lip.
Your yanks get her up until her sweaty back meets your chest, arch deepening when you lean into her, lips caressing her tinted ear.Â
You love me, mama?Â
She shudders on you, Fuck, yes â so fuckinâ much! Love this dick!Â
Yeah? Itâs yours?
F-Fuckinâ mine⊠AâAll mineâÂ
You reach around to find her clit, and she gushes around you, Show me who it belongs to. You beg and she meets your hips, Get me fuckinâ nasty with it, cum all over your dick, baby, your words hit her like a threat, and she wails curses; sucks you all the way in when the tightness builds; you push in as deep as you can and it sends her over. Ellieâs thrashes and you're forced to hold her up, arm thrown around her chest while she grinds back onto you; you can feel how hard sheâs cumming as the base jerks with her pulses, your name a constant on her tongue. You grind into her until she shakes, nails scratching at your hips to stop you.Â
Ellieâs limp when you pull out, purple coated in white creaminess, and she whimpers like sheâs begging you to come back home.Â
Lay down, you choke. Your walls wonât stop clenching.Â
She turns her head to kiss your neck before supporting her weight on her hands.Â
Nuh uh, You tsk, On your back. Needa see you when I cum. You say, and she whines like a bitch, slick and cum flooding at her entrance. You help her maneuver and yank her closer until sheâs staring up at you and her entrance lines up with your strap, eyes delicate and trusting and obsessed. The trees in them brush with ferocity and need for you; a tight hand squeezes her cheeks so her lips pucker, and you bend down to kiss her. Itâs gross: desperate and uncoordinated tongues entangle with one another, spit spreading on the outside of each other's mouths, loud smacking noises filling your ears with lecher. It gets you hot, and you melt when Ellieâs hand blindly grabs for your dick to slide it between her sopping lips. Your body flattens on top of hers as she guides you in, her mouth opening around moans as you stretch her all over again.Â
Thereâs still resistance; Howâs she this fucking tight?Â
Your hips follow her guide until you're nudged deep, barely half an inch of green exposed. Her thighs spread wider around your waist so you fit snug between, no space amidst your bodies. Your elbows rest on either side of her head, holding you up while your tongues swirl. Your knees dig into the mattress and your hips move on autopilot; your tongue dazedly licks over her lips to her jaw, bruising the skin a deep maroon. The sounds that erupt from her cunt are filthy, begging for your cum in earnest.Â
Your eyes flutter open to study Ellieâs face; her body bobs when your hips meet, her eyes squeezed shut and her battered lips glistening, sinful verbiage spilling from her, completely brainless as her peak approaches.Â
Your head drops into her neck and she holds you close, moaning against her throat with every deep thrust; the stimulation on your clit is nearly too much; Youâre so sensitive, but you drill into her, take whatâs yours. Her nails are deep in your back and it stings, wetness spilling from you from the pain. Youâre hardly fucking her, just grinding your hips as you chase your release, filling her deep.Â
Sheâs mumbling about how hard sheâs going to cum. Yeah? You spit in her ear, Gonna fuckinâ cum? And she squeaks out curses in approval. Ellieâs moans pitch high before slick splatters on both your thighs, soaks through the sheets. You lift your heavy head to watch Ellie jerk and sob and confess her utter devotion to you as long as you continue to fuck her like this. You love her so fucking much; She deserves to feel this good; to wake up to pleasure and put back to bed with it.
Ellieâs orgasm breaks her; her babbles slur and crack as they hit your lips: you make me cum so good, fuck me âtil you cum, I love you so fuckinâ much; sheâs all over the place but she begs for your pleasure, begs for you to release . The pace in your thrusts rebuilds; youâre moaning in her mouth, clit throbbing in your soaked underwear. You can practically taste your release where it sits on the edge of your tongue, completely unbound when you slur promises;
Gonna give you all my fucking cum.Â
You take in how far her pretty eyes roll at your confession, how cravingly she begs for you stuff her with sticky white; it makes your clit jerk, once, twice, until your walls pull in tightâ
Ellieâs orgasm triggers your own; the pleasure is so intense that itâs painful and your vision whites out, all while she coats your waist in love and desire and slick. Youâre both so loud and canât keep still, sultry bodies trembling against one another. You grow lightheaded when Ellieâs hips fuck down and onto you to prolong your orgasm, voice dripping in seduction in your ear as she encourages you to fill her up, to keep her good and dirty.Â
It feels like minutes pass when the pleasure finally subsides; you canât stop shaking and thereâs no strength in your limbs, resting completely weightless on top of your girlfriend. Your head rests in Ellieâs palms as she pecks all over your face, thanking you, asking if youâve found any inspiration.Â
Youâve never been so excited to draw an O face in your fucking life. You need new pens!
â⊠Ellie?âÂ
âMhm?â She sounds just as wrecked as you feel, and a smile settles on your face.Â
âD-Did I earn that eight?âÂ
She exhales a laugh before kissing your sweaty forehead, âAnd that five star Yelp review.â You wheeze out a celebratory yaaay and Ellieâs body rocks with laughter beneath you.Â
The sun is going to rise soon. Ellieâs not tired.Â
She loves dawn. Itâs her favorite time of day: the giant, boiling orb just barely cresting from behind mountains, birds flocking and framing the rays of light, clouds orange and pink and a misty blue. Sheâs taken hundreds of pictures of that gorgeous scenery alone; Itâs funny how she feels like somethingâs missing from them now that youâre back in her life.Â
She wants you in the center of every picture she takes. In all of her favorite places⊠In her car, in her room, in water. Youâre a fucking star on camera.Â
A freshly showered Ellie rests on her bed(with new sheets⊠her blue ones are forever ruined) as she rolls up, eyes glued to the back of your head. Youâre sitting on the floor, right on her fluffy rug, the sound of pen scratching against paper surrounding you, secluded in a space of peace. Proud canât describe what she feels.Â
Ellie seals the blunt as she imagines what youâre creating. You told her she couldnât see until itâs finished, but sheâs becoming impatient. Ellieâs nosy; She thought giving you puppy-eyes would work like every other time, but you simply got up and moved somewhere private with a twinkle in your eye.Â
Ellie reaches for her lighter on her nightstand and sparks, âWanna hit?â You deny calmly, focused, entranced by your imagery, and Ellie sighs. She's happy youâre easing back into drawing, but she wants attention. Sheâs in love; Sue her.Â
Ellie puffs in silence. The more she inhales, the fonder she grows. Whyâre you so far away? She smokes half the blunt before stubbing out the end, placing it on the ashtray on her small desk. She tries to be sly and creep behind you slowly to get a peak of your creation, but the shuffling of blankets exposes her. You whip your head and shut your book with quickness, a smirk on your face. Her bottom lip traps between her face to hide a smile when you ask,Â
âCan I help you?âÂ
She inches closer until her lips graze your ear, inhaling her cinnamon body wash on you, âCome to bed?âÂ
âIn a minute, baby, promise.â You whisper back when she kisses underneath your earlobe. She hums in disapproval, âNow.âÂ
âAnd if I donât?âÂ
Ellie says the first thing that comes to mind, doesnât even bother to play into your frisky threat. Itâs terrorized her mind for the past four years, kept her company when you were gone and she had to settle with her own hand.Â
Youâre a fucking star on camera.Â
â⊠You ever made a tape?â The proposal is quiet and husky, and your eyes turn to globes, stunned and instantly filled with darkness.Â
â⊠Are you serious?â Ellie nods, her tongue teasing the shell of your ear, lips inching down to your neck, sucking at your shoulder.Â
âOh, youâre crazy.âÂ
âCome to bed.â Much more stern, and you shudder, tossing your book to the side.Â
âHow do cam-couples do this shit, what the fuck.âÂ
Ellieâs attention gets pulled from her tripod and lands on you, back arched with her iPad in both hands that extend out to the bed frame. The cameraâs on you, trying to get the perfect capture of your ass, constantly adjusting your form.Â
âItâs truly a skill,â Ellie mumbles back, securing her camera. She ensures that the plate wonât wobble before carrying it by the stand and placing it beside the bed. âYou look excited.âÂ
âExcited like yaaay or excited like horny?â Your ass wiggles teasingly and Ellie snorts.Â
âBoth.âÂ
âYâknow, for someone whoâs never done this, you look like a professionalââ
Ellie scoffs, âI am a professional. Degree and two licensesââ
Your jaw slacks around moans and your hips thrusts back, âFuuuck, thatâs hot. Rub it in my face some more, itâs getting me so wetââ
Ellie stares blankly and you burst into cackles, dropping her device on the freshly made mattress.
âNerdy Spider-geek wrecks school slutâs pussy non-stop orgasmsââ
Ellie sits next to you, adjusting the lense, âWhat the fuck are you talking about.âÂ
You snort, âOur vid title. Or â orrr, I gotta better one! Constellation station makes astrology-loser girlfriend see the Milky Wayââ
âNo oneâs gonna click that.âÂ
âI would!â The bed dips behind Ellie, and goosebumps rise on her skin when your lips connect with the muscles in her back. Graze all the way up her neck, âAnd you would, too. Lilâ freak.â Ellieâs core gives a tight squeeze. What a change of fucking events: used to be bullied over being the schoolâs freak show, and now her bodyâs begging her girlfriend to throw it in her face one more time.Â
âIâm not posting anything.âÂ
You tsk, âA shame. Couldâve used that OnlyFans bag.â A dreamy sigh from you, âYou know you can do whatever you want to me, right?âÂ
âIâve been told.âÂ
âAnd I meant it.â Youâre a fucking siren, âYour time to shine, baby. Nothingâs off limits in my book.âÂ
Ellieâs stern, âIâm not gonna hurt you.âÂ
âWhatever you like, I like. Wanna feel how wet you make me, space ranger?âÂ
You and Ellie are polar opposites, and somehow share the singular fucking braincell when youâre horny. You have the same effect on her. She turns her head to meet your eyes, âCan I fix the camera first?âÂ
A gentle peck on her cheek gets her body thrumming, âAy, ay, captain.â And you fall back onto the mattress, rolling until you reach the other side of the bed. Youâre up and running to the bathroom⊠with the 9M Sex bag in your hand.Â
⊠Ellieâs never been more afraid(wet) than she is right now.Â
The set up is ready. One tripod simply wasnât enough to capture all that you bring; Ellie found another thrown in the back of her closet and got it situated, angled and ready, at the foot of the bed where her phone and iPad lay. She doesnât know why sheâs so nervous like you didnât just beat her walls down a few hours ago. This discarded blunt isnât helping her, either.Â
Ellieâs confident that sheâll faint mid-strokeâ
âSmells like pussy in here.âÂ
Ellie blushes and turns at your call from the bathroom entryway. Sheâs engulfed in flames at the sight of you.Â
⊠Youâre cute. Sheâll give you that.Â
She scoffs a laugh around smoke at the alien antennas in your locs, and the green alien head on the triangle of your thong. Her eyes squint as she watches you pose in the doorway, bent over, squeezing your breasts. She scales your body as you prance over until youâre standing in front of her, staring down into her eyes.Â
âWhatcha think, space ranger?â You seduce, pushing your tits into her face, âWanna teach a clueless little alien about sexual healing?âÂ
âYouâre⊠insane.âÂ
âYou love it,â ⊠She does. Fuck, she does. You leer at her, âIs she rollinâ?â
⊠Weed? Always.
⊠Camera. Camera!Â
Ellie drags her free hand up the back of your thigh while sticking her blunt between her lips, blindly reaching around to the camera. Her fingers feel around until a small beep slices through the weighted silence, the red light indicating the start of a recording.Â
âShe is now.â Ellie takes one last rip, and it chokes her a bit, smoke wafting up to your nostrils before she stubs it out, discarding her tray and lighter to the side. The scent gets you giddy.Â
You hum, and Ellie falls back at your shove, andÂ
sheâs pounced on in no time. Your finger locks around her Spider-Man charm to pull her closer. Youâre slow at first, teasing her mouth with yours before pecking, licking over her lips like a kitten while she gets handfuls of your bare ass. Boldness sparks in her chest when she thinks about the camera directly behind you; her hands move mindlessly, pulling your asscheeks apart until the string is right above your stretched asshole, your pussy lips swallowing the tiny triangle.Â
You moan into her mouth when the bunched fabric rubs against your clit; the fabric is already soaked through and sticky, and the kiss breaks with Ellieâs satisfied grin.Â
Adrenaline jolts through her body when her mouth trails down your jaw, a tight hand clamped around your soft cheeks to force your head wherever she needs it. She drinks up every small noise you breathe into the muggy air, mouth tickling the shell of your ear like a feather, Ride my fucking face, she whispers â demands; it sounds like sheâs begging, and you gasp.Â
Do it, Ellie beckons, Show out, superstar.Â
Your girlfriend is so fucking sexy⊠But, of course, your dark thoughts win.Â
âS-Should I make, like⊠alien noises when I bust, or somethinâ? E.T, phone home type shit?â
Ellie snaps with a glare, âDonât kill my fucking vibe.âÂ
âOkay, damn! My fault! Just tryna be cute for the vlog.âÂ
â⊠Itâs not a fucking vlogââ
âDay in the life of annoying artistic lesbians who are also gayââ
âI'm drying up.â Ellieâs palms dig into her eyes.Â
âNo youâre not,â you purr before climbing up her torso. She grabs your waist before you reach her chin.Â
âTurn around. Want the cam to see your face.âÂ
Your antennas wiggle on your head when you switch positions, â⊠Beep bop beepboopââ
You fall over in hysterics at Ellieâs hollered laughter. âOh my â PFFFT ââ
âSTOP FUCKING LAUGHING!â You scream back at her, wiping tears from your face, âIâm tryna be cute!â You huff and swing a leg over her waist, and Ellie silences. The length of your back is on display for her; Youâre cracking jokes about fucking alien sex but sheâs not listening. How could she when your ass rests pert on her chest, when the sight of your dripping cunt and tight asshole is right there? Practically on her chinâ
Câmere. Back up a little. She whispers, but youâre shy, only inching up her chest with sparkly eyes. Ellie rolls hers before wrapping her arms around your thighs to yank you back. She snickers and eyes the wet alien over your clit.Â
Her smile drops when a sly hand slides over your ass, index finger hitching into the string of your thong to pull it to the side. A moan leaves Ellieâs mouth when your pussy clenches from above, and you snort mockingly.Â
Youâre easy as fuck. Such a cutie pieâ
Shut the fuck up, you only laugh harder, and Ellieâs hands twitch, irritation sizzling in her fingertips. Youâre so fucking annoying and sheâs soaking. Sheâd drink you for days.Â
The next moments go by in a flash; your thong is shredded by icy hands, dangling limply from your waist as excited squeals leave your mouth. Ellieâs tongue is aggressive where it swipes all over your cunt, arms synched tight around the meat of your thighs to hold you still. Your smell intoxicates her, turns her mind lucid, makes her squirm and ache. Every second that passes, her excitement to re-watch your creation grows. She wishes she could see you.Â
You love cameras, attention â limelight. You deserve every inkling of praise; mutters against your cunt how good you are, how soft your pussy is, how bad she wants to make you cry. Ellie growls into you when your hips start rocking on her face, testing the waters with your hands planted on her thighs. Her arms drop flat on the mattress, allowing you full access to use her. Ellieâs tongue lays over her bottom lip, and your movements bolden. Your hips curl, slick smearing all over her mouth to the tip of her nose.Â
FâFuck, baby, oh shitâÂ
Ellie moans like sheâs urging you to drench her entire face. Her tongue slithers inside your cunt and you choke out her name, nails sinking into her thighs. The muscle moves inside you with purpose, swirling up against your walls as they squeeze down. The cries that leave are too much for her; she swears thereâs a puddle left on the blankets beneath her.Â
When you gasp, fuck, baby, cumming for you, Ellie whimpers and her thighs squeeze together. Her arms pull you as close as she can get you, slurping and sucking at your clit as it pulses through your orgasm. You beg her not to stop, thighs quaking around her head. Ellie alternates from flicking your clit to sucking cum from your slit, and she envisions your gorgeous eyes rolled back beneath her eyelids.Â
Wanna make me cum again, baby? Yeah? Your sonics tremble alongside Ellieâs thighs. She knows you're smiling like an angel at the lens and she sobs for more of your cum, more of your taste. Your moans pick up with the snaps of your hips once more.Â
F-Fuck me with your tongue, Ellie, You plead and she listens; Your walls melt around her, softness closing in around the wet muscle. Ellieâs whole body twitches when a soft hand rests above her boxers, right on her swollen bud and rubs. She's bucking up into your palm, desperate for friction, but you don't... give it. She groans against your lips and sucks you harder, and you squeal.
It doesn't take long for you to peak again; slick glides down Ellie's chin and drowns her, coats her throat in dreamy stickiness with her nails in the fat of your ass.
She slurps and eats you up until you're running up the mattress with her name melted on your tongue.
âHow the fuck â oh my fuckinâ god, put your head downââ
Ellie snickers at you struggling to get her in the frame of the iPad camera. She comfortingly rubs over your ass, âThereâs a camera right in front of you, babeââ
âNot good enough. Iâm tryna watch you hit it.âÂ
More jerking around. More flipping of the device. More sighs of annoyance before you strike gold. 80% of Ellieâs face is in frame⊠alongside her pretty titties. Mission somewhat accomplished. You watch her smile through the lens before sending a thumbs up. The iPad gets adjusted before you throw her one behind your head.Â
âUhhh⊠So what now?âÂ
âWhat do you mean.âÂ
âI just⊠stick it in?âÂ
âMhm. Touch anywhere. Fuck me however you want. Make love to me. Iâll love it. I love you.âÂ
Your voice turns her into the largest puddle of pink glitter. That deep, broken twinge gets her bones sizzling. âI love you more.âÂ
Your hips buck back on her so hard that she almost falls over, but she managed to catch what youâre throwing. Barely. Her heartâs in her throat.Â
âProve itâŠâ
Ellie can see your smile and her teeth grit at your snicker.Â
âFucking bottom.âÂ
Your head gets pushed down into the sheet, and you smile, antennas standing tall. You grin so goddamn wide. Lottery. LotteryâÂ
Everything is silent⊠Minus the little alert of the started recording when Ellie whispers against the curve of your ear,Â
âDonât start that shit again. Donât.âÂ
You whimper as audibly as you can with a smushed cheek. It seems to push her; sheâs reaching between your legs and your clit leaps in appreciation. In infatuation. Her fingers slosh between a deep brown and pink as she messily kisses your sweaty back.Â
âBehave.â Her rubs are deadly on your clit,Â
âI-I know we were joking earlierââ
âWhat nowââ
âYou like being called daddy?âÂ
Everything stops. Your brain never fails to ruin your satisfaction. âNo, what the fuckââ
âDamn⊠forreal?âÂ
âDudeââ
âJust asking! You may proceed.âÂ
When Ellie senses that youâll finally shut the fuck up, she does, and youâre happy again.Â
âIf you call me mommy, Iâll strangle you.â Ellie slurs wetly against the end of your spine. She tsks when she catches your ass and cunt squeeze down at the threat, walls sucking hard on the finger she hadnât registered slipped in. Fucking high-fiving each other.Â
The curve in your spine deepens when a certain tip rubs up against your clit. Nestles right in between the plump of your lips. Slides back and forth slowly.Â
Youâre so loud already⊠Youâre watching your own nut build right in front of your eyes; You canât help it. In front of your sexy ass girlfriend. Mainly due to the mirroring of Ellie staring at where you two connect with such thirst. Sheâs ravenous for you and you fucking love her.Â
âFuck me, baby, please, please.âÂ
âI like that.â She states plainly, so you get louder.Â
âPlease, Ellie, please? Pleââ
A recording alert and a flash appears in your lens. Ellie holds her phone up as she captures you from the back; all over your spine, your ass, your holes that desperately twitch and beg for her entry.Â
âShhh, gotchu, honey. Just playing with you.â She coos quietly. Your body wracks at her voice and she hides a smirk with teeth in her lip. âWish you could see how much youâre leaking right now. So fucking sexy.â
No brain. Brainless. Youâre brainless. Just Ellie and pleasure and happiness and love. Your blinks are lost. You may never go back to your dadâs again.Â
You canât see her guide herself in but you feel it. Feel that nudge inside and your mouth gapes. The iPad tremors with your shaky movements as she presses in. She takes her time, captures every pant and jerk of hips before she halts them with a stern hand. When sheâs fully sat inside you, she locks eyes with you in the front frame. Drinks in your muted pleads of her to wreck you however she pleases.Â
Ellie holds your gaze when she pulls out. Sheâs battling; conflicted between watching how your eyes welt and shine or memorizing the stretch of your cunt. Jade crystals flit back and forth. Anywhere they can reach.Â
H-How ya doinâ back there?Â
A harsh thrust from your girlfriend earns her a guttural noise from your lips before she mumbles, Think mâ good.Â
You are, baby, fuckâ
Praise gets her going. She stops her own recording and tosses her phone some fucking where before hands close around your hips â tightly, so tightly. Holds you steady and still before she takes.Â
Ellie might not use this fucking iPad footage. The screen fucking rattles every time she hits and crests deep inside you, bruising you. All thatâs caught in the frame is your lovedrunk eyes and your loud, slobbery mouth and glittery antennas bouncing on your head. Quick glimpses of Ellieâs tits jumping.Â
Thereâs a constant change of pace and it gives you whiplash. Her fucking goes from brutal to passionate to leisure to just fucking grinding while sheâs fully submerged in your wetness. Sheâs experimenting, as she should! You treasure every grab and scratch and tug at your skin. Sheâs yanking and pulling at you like a fucking rag doll and your body goes lax.Â
So does your fucking tongue, apparently.Â
âThe fuck did you just say?â Ellie spits down at you.Â
But she doesnât stop. She fucks you faster, and you start sobbing.Â
âY-You fucking heard me. I know you wannaââ
âIâm not saying that shit.â Her hips snap with intent to punish and the device falls from your hands, face planted deep in her soft blankets and tugging at her sheets.Â
âJust say it! Sayitsayitââ
Ellie groans like an animal from behind you. Grabs the back of your neck and shoves your face down into her sheets, muffling your shouts and begs to degrade the living shit outta you. Call you disgusting names that got the two of you in that complicated mess when you first met. The slapping of wet skin and your screams make her crazed and wound up so tight that she almost slips.Â
Ellieâs trying to ignore the piercing, tearful pleads of callmeaslutcallmeaslutimyourwhore but sheâs leaking like a fucking faucet. Knows she shouldnât reopen that fucking Pandoraâs box when youâre so vulnerable, but sheâs fuckdrunk and so are you.Â
âYou gonna cum?âÂ
You nod.Â
âYou like when Iâm mean to you?âÂ
You nod faster and Ellieâs tummy squeezes. She scoffs a disgusting laugh before her body melds against your back, your angled knees slipping down the mattress so sheâs fully laid on you, viperid tongue right at your earâŠÂ
It's just this once... You know she loves you... One little jumbled slur wouldn't do too much harm. You're begging her for it, aren't you?
Something in your mind breaks over the next minute and a half. The last memory you have is Ellieâs teeth nipping at your lobe before she whispered,Â
I love turning you into my nasty little slut.Â
And that was that. You entered another universe filled with white noise and colorful lights and Ellie and⊠a lotta wet. You couldâve been in the Atlantic with how drenched her mattress is right now. You owe her an apology.Â
Top 2 best nuts of your life and itâs not 2.Â
Your pussyâs still twitching around her even though sheâs left you immobile. You hardly register her mumble against your back,Â
âI didnât get my pic.â
You make a questioned, weak noise. Your index finger twitches, so she grabs your wrist to kiss it.Â
âI needa pic of your O face. Iâm starting a collection. We gotta run it back again.âÂ
Another broken wheeze. A death sentence is what you have. What your girlfriend will give you.Â
Ellie was a virgin when you met her⊠but was she really?Â
You have no idea what time of day it is, what day it is, or where your fucking cat has ventured off in the house, but youâre about seven âmaybe eightâ nuts deep, and your girlfriend is still fucking you.Â
You thought she was joking when she shoved her phone in your hand and instructed you to capture the moment right before you bust all over her, but she actually meant it⊠What the fuck does she think you are? Smart? Not in this fucking state. How do you even work this goddamn phone again?Â
Câmon, baby. I just need a good one. Give it to me ân Iâll stop.Â
Her pleading moan is a double-ended sword. Your legs are so sore from being held in air as she plowed you, but youâre also a deranged, sex-obsessed, girlfriend-obsessed lesbo. Do you really want her to stop or has the dopamine melted all your brain cells? The amount of mid-orgasm photos youâve taken over the past hour couldâve filled a museum, but Ellieâs always dissatisfied, saying that she can barely see your face because you kept wiggling around. What does she expect!Â
Sheâs digging for that picture, though. Right at your cervix.Â
Been such a good little slut. Taking it so good. Just do this last little thing for me.Â
Youâre nodding but youâre not listening. Bells and whistles ring in your ears as your filled hand shakes. The tightness in your walls steals your breath for a second.Â
Tell me when you're boutta cum.Â
You somehow manage to get a squeak out, barely audible, but Ellie gets the point. Her hands find refuge underneath your knees and bring them up higher while she mouths at your neck. It happens all over again; that cresting feeling right before you crash.Â
I love you. Make it good.Â
Ellieâs ears split at your shouts of her name, but she grins madly at the sound of frantic camera clicks coming from above her. She plants a doting kiss on your cheek.Â
You hope you did. You really hope you did.
taggiessssss thanks 4 waiting :3 @dyk3ang3l @ellieloml @inf3ct3dd @fromminaa @womenofarcane @sawaagyapong @mina-281 @aouiaa @bbglmfao @i00rii @sakiigami @starologist @southelroys @diddiqueen @trackinglessons @ellieswhorcrux @villainousbear @p4ison1vy @tohoko @yuckyfucky @dollyfleurs @elsbunny222 @sevsbimbo @amiorca @alittlextrahoney @gato-chino @topiatwin @r3wbeef @elliesatchel @muthafuckingstargirl @callmewhenyoukan @macaroni676 @draculurasblog @ellieaesp @@gravygranules @elsblunt
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click! 2 (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you need a roommate, and you love eggplant. [college au]
WORD COUNT: 5.7kÂ
WARNINGS: photographer/roommate!ellie, ocs an artist with a rep, all ocs r black coded, crack, alcohol, arguments, more slut-shaming, bullying, disordered eating, brief mentions of sexual harassment/assault, sex for like a second, failed orgasms, masturbation, slight exhibitionismÂ
one. three. four.
A/N: heyyyyyâŠ. how yall doinđ€đ€ a little something before i go back to work kmsÂ
âSo, lemme get this straight,â Abby pinches a lollipop stick between her fingers like itâs a blunt, adjusting the invisible glasses on her face, âThe psycho just barged in?âÂ
âWith all of her shit! Didnât even bother to say good morning or anything!âÂ
Itâs been hours since the squash-loving hermit took refuge in your home, and youâre sizzling with rage as you recall the events from earlier. You clocked out zoomed to Abbyâs building in no time.Â
âDamn⊠why didnât you call security⊠or the landlord? She canât just move in without signing the contract.âÂ
You pace around Abbyâs rug-covered space, âBitch, I donât fuck with feds and rentâs due in two days!â You holler, âAnd she did sign the contract! I havenât signed it yet because I didnât know she was gonna show up and act like that. Youâre not disrespecting me in my own house.âÂ
Her head shakes, âWhatâd I tell you? If it were me⊠we wouldnât have any problems.âÂ
You point a scolding finger at the smirking blonde girl, âYes, we fucking would. Donât start.âÂ
But she presses anyway, âI think weâd be a match made in heaven, actually.â She rises from the couch and hovers over you, the tip of your index connecting with her strong, covered chest. Your glare persists, but thereâs warmth pulling in your gut from her scent.Â
Your skin is flaming; This is why youâll never be able to have a serious conversation â or anything, for that matter â with Abby. Her raunchy remedies arenât going to work in this situation; Youâre too stressed.Â
âBut anyway,â Her brow arches and she backs off. Slightly. âYouâre an adult and main tenant. You gotta handle it soon.â She ponders for a moment, âBut to be fair, you texted her first.âÂ
âHow many times do I have to say that I was lit as fuck! I donât even rememberâ â
Abbyâs taunting expression makes you pause, nails digging into the skin of your palms.Â
âDonât.â
Your hiss makes her snort, âI didnât say anything.â
âYou donât have to. Itâs not funny.âÂ
Abby knows you and Dinaâs history better than anyone. Knows exactly how you got caught up in âsituationshipâ nonsense, all with liquor and a phone. You canât fault Abby for recognizing the familiarity, but a burning sting rests in your chest. Embarrassment spreads all over your cheeks, and you announce your departure in a rush.Â
Her regret is evident in the way she calls out for you, but youâre out the door in seconds, slamming it as hard as the frame can hold.Â
The winter air hits your eyes first⊠You try to convince yourself, hastily wiping the wet trails off your face. Youâre not fucking crying over Dina. Not again.Â
You snatch your phone from your pocket to ask Amaya for advice, but your heart swells when you see her messages.Â
You think back to all the times sheâs coddled you through your emotions: she drops everything to tend to your needs, no matter how big or small. Guilt would put you in the ground if she ruins her opportunity for your convenience; You canât tell her. She deserves to enjoy herself. You match your best friendâs excitement all the way back to your car.
Abby called twice during the drive back home, but you didnât answer. You know she wasnât being malicious, but youâre sensitive, especially when it comes to anything related to Dina.Â
You rip your apartment door open and find Ellie lounging on your fucking couch with Love Island playing from her laptop. And eating peanuts⊠with Chick-Fil-A ranch?Â
You slam her device shut, words sharp as nails, âI donât know who you think you are, but Iâm telling you right now, youâre not fucking staying here.â Youâre shredding through skin with your glare, but sheâs not reacting. Just sitting there and crunching, eyes void.Â
âDonât even think about unpacking. Youâre getting out tonight, I can promise you that.âÂ
âNo, Iâm not.âÂ
âWhat.â
She merely shrugs, âIâm not going anywhere.âÂ
âWhat the fuckâ â
More cracked shells, more munching; Your eyelid is jerking.Â
âRentâs on the counter, by the way.âÂ
You hold back a scoff before marching into the kitchen, eyeing the envelope labeled fake ass mortgage. You hear the contestants from the reality show resume their dialogue, but youâre locked on how thick the letter looks to bother scolding.Â
Itâs torn open⊠and filled with hundred-dollar bills. Way more than half of rent. Ellie mightâve covered the heat bill for the rest of winter.Â
âI thought you were a fucking photographer.â The shock in your voice is clear as day, mindlessly returning to the living room.Â
âI am.â She calls dryly.Â
âNo, youâre not.â You toss the money on the coffee table. âThe fuck do you do on the side? Sell drugs to freshmen?âÂ
âSure.âÂ
When your arms cross over your chest with an accusatory stare, she sighs. âI told you. I take pictures.âÂ
âOf who? The fucking councilman?âÂ
Another shrug. âWhoever asks. Itâs how I make moneyâŠâ A light pause. âAt least until I secure this job.âÂ
You squint at her, âI thought you got evicted. Youâre clearly fit to pay rent on your own.âÂ
That seems to shake her a little, staring back with hardened eyes, âAnd who the fuck are you to question me? The reason Iâm here is because of you!âÂ
âExactly! This...â Arms waving around the living room. ââŠis my fucking space! Youâre a straggler at best.âÂ
A weighted huff escapes her before she tosses her snack on the table and stands, leaning over the table.Â
âYou wouldâve been in the same position as me if I didnât show up. No where to fucking go,â She spits. âIf you want me gone, fine. But when your landlord comes knocking on your fucking door asking why youâre two weeks late, donât say shit to me.âÂ
You waver slightly and she notices, smirk darker than her pupils. Youâre steaming; Smoke is going to come out of your ears soon.Â
âThe same goes for you. I donât wanna hear your fucking voice, and donât touch anything that I paid for,â You command, âDonât even breathe in my space. Stay on your side and Iâll stay on mine.âÂ
A condescending grin plasters onto her face.Â
âWhereâd you hide that lease?âÂ
Your heart is too weak for hatred⊠or so you thought.Â
Abby, Amaya⊠everyone youâve fucking talked to about the bitch right across the hall thinks that sheâs dangerous and sick and out for blood.Â
Theyâre all wrong. Itâs you.Â
Ellie is conjuring up something villainous deep inside you; Her childish antics started off small: bumping against the wall in the middle of the night, leaving her dirty ass shoes out of place by the front door, not laying the rugs that she slipped on flat⊠Incredibly annoying, but fixable.Â
You took the time to construct a new roommate agreement that fit your unique situation the morning after your argument. It was sloppily scribbled on a crumpled piece of construction paper, but it was a symbol of peace. You taped it to her door before you left for your shift, only to return and see it ripped up and scattered in front of your door.Â
Itâs been five days since then. Five, and you can already feel a bald spot forming at the back of your skull. To think that Ellie was your first option as a roommate just days ago is laughable now. You know that none of the tricks sheâs pulling are accidental. You pride yourself in being observant, and you always catch that prideful look on her face when she nails one of your peeves.Â
You try to be here when Ellieâs not, but sheâs always home when you are. Music blasting in the wee hours of the night knowing you have three upcoming shifts to cover, on the couch rewatching the same episode of Love Island over and over while you make your breakfast, pretending to talk on the phone to friends she doesnât have as loudly as possible. Youâre fucking tired and youâre holding your hand back from slapping her.Â
But the worst part is that sheâs stocked your fridge with fucking squash. Top to bottom in all colors there is. Filled the drawers with one called cucurbita argyrosperma. You were torn between curling in hysterics and beating it over your new roommate's head; The petty side of your brain wishes that you were allergic so you could âaccidentallyâ eat some, die, and get her locked up, but you hushed it. Sheâs fucking with you, but rent and some bills are paid for the month. What a sick turn of events.Â
Youâre plotting, though. Somethingâs brewing, and Abbyâs helping you. Itâs finally Saturday, and college kids are fiending for a rager.Â
The only quality that you respect about Ellie is that sheâs clean. She washes her dishes, does her laundry (separate from yours, thank God), and sheâs deep-cleaned the bathroom twice already. Ellie despises large messes more than you, though, since youâre willing to sacrifice your tidy abode to piss her off. Let the ruckus in!
You heard her leave early this morning, and youâve noticed that when sheâs gone, sheâs gone, which gives you all the time to plan. You skip to the bathroom like a kid in a candy store, showering, brushing your teeth, doing skincare. You whip up the hardiest breakfast you can before your mall venture with Abby; Itâs been days since youâve last nutted, and you need a new vibrator. And new paintbrushes.Â
â⊠Why havenât you beat her ass again?âÂ
It only took Abby buying food for you to forgive her. You slurp down your strawberry milkshake, âFear of permanent imprisonment.âÂ
âDoes Maya know whatâs been going on?â Abby asks, shaking her head.Â
âFuck no, and sheâs never going to. Have you seen her Snaps?â You whip out your phone and show her Amayaâs stories; Sheâs exploring and meeting new people. âSheâs having a ball! The second I tell her whatâs been going on, sheâs gonna drop everything and come back. Iâm not doing that to her.âÂ
âYouâre the only outlet I have, so suck it up and listen to me bitch and moan.â You continue, âWhoâs coming tonight?âÂ
She smiles, âAs many as I could get.âÂ
âPlease tell me Armaniâs coming.âÂ
âShe is, for sure.âÂ
Your heart flutters. Armani⊠Sheâs everything you could ever want and need. Sheâs kind, smart, drop-dead gorgeous, and she bench presses with Abby on the weekends. She has your clit jumping like a salmon in the freshwater, and youâre going to see her tonight.Â
You jump awake at your alarm, eyes stinging as you glance at your phone. Itâs a little past nine; Pregaming hours.Â
You throw your lazy body into the shower and conduct your special-occasions ritual, blasting your music as loud as the speaker would allow, scrubbing your body with exfoliant to your heart's content.Â
You exit, water cascading down your shoulders and back, towel engulfed around your body. You have no idea what to fucking wear; What color does Armani like? Do lesbians qualify for the red nail theory or is that something heteros made up for TikTok followers? What if she doesnât like eucalyptus scented body wash?Â
You swallow your doubts with a shot glass.Â
Outfit prepping takes longer than expected, but youâre dressed, titties are out, and your thoughts are swirling like the liquor in your gut. You should call Amaya and tell her you love herâ
Another shot, more dancing. Youâre spinning around your small room to the bass of the beat, sloppily pulling every shot that you can, back arching and hips throwing in any direction they can.Â
The bass sounds louder the more you dance, every thud rattling the poster-covered walls of your room.Â
Itâs not until the bass surpasses the song that you realize itâs not bass at all. Itâs knocking⊠on your bedroom door. You snicker; Abbyâs here with your girl.Â
You donât know why sheâs boxing with your door, though. Beating the shit out of it. When you yank it open, youâre instantly annoyed at who appears behind it.Â
A⊠gray sweat clad Ellie propped against the door frame, arms crossed over her chest and red hairs framing her face. You force your eyes upward, right in between hers. The dots on her face look like skittles. Since when does she have a fucking tattoo? Are you hallucinating or is it a fat ass leaf with eyeballs?
You barely registered what she said, âCan you turn that off? Itâs almost eleven.âÂ
âWhy, absolutely-the-fuck-not.â You slur, and she cringes, nose wrinkling at the scent of liquor on you. âWhereâs Abby?âÂ
Ellieâs biceps are⊠out on the prowl. And the veins in her hands are still there. Just checking. Right between her eyes again.Â
âWho the hell is that?âÂ
âMy bitch.â You chuckle.
Ellieâs eyes widen and you correct yourself.Â
âN-Not bitch like whore. Bitch likeïżœïżœ like, thatâs my bitch! Sheâs great, love her. BFF⊠not over Amaya, though.â
Ellieâs getting annoyed; Her nose wonât stop twitching. â⊠Is she coming over?âÂ
âShe should be on her way.â
âIs she stupid?âÂ
âWhat.âÂ
âIs your⊠bitch stupid?âÂ
âUm, no, sheâs not fucking stupid. What the hell are you on.â You snap, offended for your friend.Â
âTell her to stay the fuck home before she gets buried.âÂ
⊠Did Ellie just threaten to kill one of your sneaky-links? Before she gets buried?Â
âAnd what the fuck are you gonna do? Just so you know, whatever you do, sheâll double it and send it back! And Iâm jumping in, soâ âÂ
Your roommateâs gawking in disbelief. â⊠I meant buried by the snow, you fucking idiot. Thereâs a blizzard outside.âÂ
Youâre flatlining, you can feel it.Â
âThereâs a what.âÂ
âCheck the damn news.â She pushes herself off the wall and turns towards her room, âAnd go to bed. Looks like you need it.âÂ
Her door slams shut. Sheâs definitely poking fun at your eyebags. You thought you did a good job at concealing them.Â
A fucking blizzard? December just started. You check your phone, reading the influx of messages from your dad, Amaya, Abby telling you to stay safe and indoors and the partyâs cancelled because of the storm and you want to fucking dieâ
You tear a slit in your blinds and⊠yup. Pure white is pelting from the dark gray clouds in the sky, the formerly black street painted ivory with ice. Not a car in sight, and if they are, theyâre covered entirely.Â
The harsh reality hasnât even set in yet. The girl you want to strangle is trapped inside with you; Sheâs not going anywhere, either. Youâre going to be forced to see her everywhere in your two-bedroom apartment. And youâre not having sex tonight.Â
Plan PISS-ELLIE-OFF was a bust. Youâre drunk and hungryâ
Your eyes bulge; When was the last time youâve gone grocery shopping?Â
You clumsily rush to the kitchen, nearly ripping your fridge door off the handle. When you're met with the pack of cream cheese and mini croissants you bought last week and all of Ellieâs fresh groceries (including squash), you almost start crying. You slept away all your pre-storm chore hours.Â
Ellie pads in the kitchen with an empty ice cream carton and spoon, headphones blasting in her ears. She doesnât acknowledge you as she throws away the carton and grabs the unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips. Your mouth waters.Â
You watch as she rips the bag open, the salty, bitter aroma traveling into your nostrils.Â
âEllie.â She canât hear you over the fuckery penetrating her eardrums!Â
You tap her shoulder harder than necessary. âDonât touch me.â
âWHY DIDNâT YOU TELL ME THERE WAS A STORM?â
Her veiny hand â fuck â pushes one of her ear cups over to the side, not even bothering to look at you as she fills her bowl to the brim with the crunchy snack; You never noticed how heavily pierced her left ear is.Â
âWho are you again?âÂ
Alright. Your tongue gets loose, âYou know, you donât have to act like a fucking cunt all the time! I tried to be nice to you andââÂ
âYeah, âcause shit talking me with your friends is so fucking nice.â She scoffs and turns, pointed glare set on you. Your stomach drops. How the fuck did she know that?
âDrop the fucking act already. Youâre also a cuntâŠâ Her eyes drag over your appearance. âAmongst other things, evidently.âÂ
Ellieâs eyes hold so much disdain, and you instantly feel exposed and gross. Your face sears with embarrassment, arms mindlessly crossing over your chest in attempts to cover up.Â
â⊠What the fuck does that mean?â You know what she means.Â
âYou think Iâm a fucking freak and a loser and a bunch of other shit Iâve been called since forever?â She sneers, âThen youâre a fucking slut. Howâs that for nice?âÂ
Your body locks up, freezes, and you fight back vomit. Ellie grabs her bowl and exits the kitchen, door slamming shut, leaving you to simmer in her spite.Â
You donât feel hungry anymore.Â
You didnât drink enough last night. Youâre awake, and you remember everything. And youâre so fucking hungry.Â
Guilt festers in your chest like rats, and anxiety is building in your fingers. Your head hurts so bad and your mouth is dry, but you refuse to move from under your blankets to get water. You didnât even have the energy to take your make-up off last night, mascara and small sparkles smeared all over your pillowcase.Â
You wallow, using the heavy wind outside as stress relief. People really think youâre a whore with no self-respect, even after a year. Your heartâs hitting against your ribcage at an alarming pace. Deep breaths, thatâs all you can do.Â
Tears jerk in your eyes as you recall every unwanted stare, every cat-call, every grope and dirty text message youâve received from people you both know and donât. You freeze and⊠thatâs it. You just donât move and hope they can read that youâre scared.Â
Does Ellie feel the same way when people talk poorly about her?Â
Your breathing techniques arenât working so you sit up, shaking your hands and digging your palms into your wet eyes. Youâre suddenly too hot for blankets.Â
Your clock reads near noon; Youâve been awake for hours. Your feet plant on the cool wood and sigh in relief before standing and snagging your new paint brushes off your dresser.Â
Your hands tremble as you fill a water cup and grab a black canvas, setting up your workspace on the floor. You squirt hues of blue, green and white on a dried paper plate and let your brush do the work; Youâre not thinking, just painting, smudging, trapping yourself in emptiness. The scene youâre creating is drying your tears; You wish you could escape into the grass field, even for a second.Â
Your water cup is brown by the time you finish; How long have you been sitting here? The needles in your legs tell you long enough. Your vision will have to wait.Â
You unlock and quietly open the door⊠It doesnât matter, though. Ellieâs awake and silently sitting on the couch. You pay her no mind and venture to the fridge for your croissants and cream cheese, throwing your pastries in the microwave.Â
Eyes are on you. You feel them in your back.Â
When the microwave dings, you spread cream cheese all over the buttery dough. Ellieâs hoarse voice freezes you. Not again.Â
âThe blizzard⊠isnât stopping.â
You finally inspect your roommate: leg bouncing and brows furrowed, nails between her teeth, eyes locked on the window that shows the heavy snowfall.Â
âUsually how they work.âÂ
Your sarcasm doesnât move her, âThey said it would pass after a couple of hours yesterday! It hasnât let up yet!â
âNever listen to weathermen. They make shit up as they go.â You keep your voice curt while you make your plate. It looks a hot mess; You wish you had blackberry jam.Â
âThey canât make shit up when thereâs money on the fucking line!â You hear footsteps from behind you; Ellieâs pacing. âI have a client today. Their photos were supposed to go in my portfolio before I submit it!âÂ
Her statement makes you pause. You didnât think about that; Itâs impossible to travel anywhere at the moment. How the fuck are you going to get to work? You canât afford to miss shifts. Itâs almost that time of the month.Â
âThis was one of the biggest bookings Iâve gotten and Iâm gonna miss it because of the fucking weather!âÂ
You donât know why she's talking to you, so you cut the conversation short. âYouâll figure it out.â You enter your room without another word, slamming the door as hard as noise complaints would allow.Â
After a few minutes, Ellieâs door slams, too.Â
Hours pass and youâre covered in paint. Your one flower field turned into three, one with detailed butterflies, one with raining rose petals, one with your motherâs name spelled out with clouds.Â
Your fingers are sore, but you feel lighter. Those croissants wore off a long time ago; Youâre starving. What youâd give for grilled eggplant and shrimp with Greek yogurt and lemon juiceâ
A soft knock lands on your door, and you stiffen. You stand, legs popping and arms stretching over your head as you wobble to your door.Â
The second it opens, you're hit with the smell of garlic and herbs and your mouth waters. Ellie stands over you, playing with her fingers. You donât register that youâre missing pants until she gawks at your bare legs; Warmth spreads across your body and you maneuver so she canât see them behind the door.Â
A moment of awkward silence before she chokes, âThereâs, uh⊠thereâs soup on the stove.â You scoff, ignoring the growling in your stomach.Â
âI donât like squash, Ellie.âÂ
The door slams in her face and she sighs behind the wood.Â
âŠ
Later that night, you sneak into the dark kitchen, the big pot of soup still on the stove. You open the lid and inspect its contents: shredded chicken, carrots, fucking⊠green leaves of some sort. You grab a spoon and taste it to be safe. Itâs good, and thereâs no squash in it. You eat two warm bowls.Â
The storm calms when you wake the next morning. Thank God; You havenât had coffee in days.Â
Ellieâs gone for the day, so you blast music while in the shower. You dry and dress in silence, yanking your underwear and jeans up your legs, throwing on a pair of earmuffs over your earphones and a puffer.Â
You almost slip on the ice from the sidewalk on the way to you and Abbyâs coffee shop before heading to class like normal. You go grocery shopping before your first shift.Â
Work drags on like normal, legs numb from standing and throat dry from sale attempts at checkout. Who the fuck wants to apply for a credit card for a coffee machine website?Â
Itâs not until your shift is on its last limbs that your heart stops in your chest. The bell rings to the hardware store, and you instantly rush to the back to retrieve your other coworker. Itâs Dina. What the fuck.Â
You burst into the break room, âRaja, Raja, I need a favor.âÂ
She slurps her ramen, exclaiming what around her soggy noodles.Â
You search for any heads and whisper, âThereâs someone I used to fuck outside! Can you take care of her, please, I canâtâ â
âOkay, okay, damn. I got itâ â
The service bell rings, âGo, go! Hurry up!â Your coworker swallows her noodles and plasters her smile on her face. You hide behind the cracked door and listen to everything.Â
âHey, ladies! Sorry about the wait!âÂ
âNo problem!â Dinaâs laugh sends a pain in your chest, âI just needed a new bike lock. Someone tried to steal mine, like, what the fuck.âÂ
Thereâs an unfamiliar laugh that melds with Dinaâs. âNo problem! Would you like to sign up for a Coffee Brewers credit card with your purchase? Theyâll repair all filter baskets and decanters for 45% off!âÂ
You almost smile; Dina doesnât drink coffee. Raja checks them out, and you peer out the small opening of the door. Dina and⊠whoever the fuck that is are snuggled up behind the service counter, her head resting on the randomâs shoulder. Theyâre whispering and laughing and youâre disgusted. And sad.Â
They depart with a small bag and Raja almost smashes the door into your face.Â
âWhat the fuck are you doing?âÂ
âMourning.âÂ
âDamn⊠sorry, man.âÂ
You shrug and thank your coworker before returning to your position. What couldâve been.Â
Itâs late when you get home.Â
Ellieâs on the couch; You feel her watch as you unlace your boots and unravel your scarf. You set your bag on the floor and grab your Cheesecake Factory brown bread loaf for your grilled PB&J. Ellie clears her throat; You say nothing.Â
She coughs louder when you butter your bread.Â
âAre you sick or something?â
Ellie whips her head around, âNo, why?âÂ
âYouâre coughing like youâre gonna die.âÂ
Your roommate doesnât reply, so you turn and toast your bread on the stove.Â
âHow was the soup?âÂ
Your eyes bulge, âHuh?âÂ
âDid it taste⊠like, decent?âÂ
You stare down at your sizzling toast, âI dunno what you mean.âÂ
Voice flat as ever, she says, âThe soup⊠you had someâ â
âNo, I didnâtâ â
âWhaâ I know what was in the pot when I ate. You had someââÂ
You face her, skin boiling, âOkay, and what about it? Yes, I ate some! I wouldâve had three bowls instead of two if I wasnât so fucking tired! It was good as fuck! I slept like a baby!âÂ
She calls your name but you ignore her, âSorry, I got my disgusting, slutty germs all over your stupid chicken noodle soup! Is that what you wanna hear! What, are whores not allowed food, either?! Whyâd you offer it to me then?!âÂ
Another rushed call of your name, but you press on, âYâknow, youâre actually weird as fuck! Who calls someone a filthy, bottom of the barrel gutter rat then offers them soup the next day! What kinda limbo fuckery are you playinâ atâ â
BEEP, BEEP, BEEP⊠BEEPâ
You gasp when the fire alarm sounds. When you turn, your toast is charred black and surrounded by dark smoke. You cut the heat off and push the pan over. Ellieâs running with a towelette, waving it around the beeping alarm.Â
You grab a washcloth and help her, and eventually it cuts off. Ellie rushes over to the front door and switches the ceiling fan on.Â
Your sandwich is fucking ruined. Great!Â
You donât know why youâre sobbing, but itâs loud. You just want to go to fucking bed. Ellieâs just standing there with a towel in hand, fiddling with her earlobe. How embarrassing.Â
You push yourself off the counter and turn to go to your room, but Ellie calls for you.Â
âWhat?! What now, Ellie!âÂ
She cringes, âIâ Youâre not a⊠slut?âÂ
Your teary eyes squint at her. âAre you asking meâ â
âNo! No, Iâm⊠Sorry? Youâre not a slut.â This is the weirdest apology youâve ever received in your entire goddamn life.Â
âWell, fuck me! Thanks!â You snark between sniffles. You yank your bedroom door open.
âYouâre good at painting!â She shouts, and you stop.Â
For some reason, you sob harder, and she panics, âUhh⊠I mean, like, for an amateur! Like, youâre decent enough!âÂ
Now youâre⊠laughing? You need to sleep now. Ellie chuckles uncomfortably, and you snicker darkly to yourself, âLife is a fucking joke, oh my god.âÂ
Your fingers dig deep into your wet eyes, and Ellieâs sock-covered feet pad closer.Â
âLook, Iâm not⊠I don't know what to say.âÂ
âThen donât talk.âÂ
ââKay.âÂ
She stands there in silence and watches you wipe your face on your sweater sleeve, mascara smearing all over the fabric.Â
âWhy didnât you use squash in the soup?âÂ
âUh⊠you wouldnât have eaten it if I did.âÂ
You nod and stare at the wall. âSo, what? That was a peace offering?âÂ
Ellie contemplates what she should say.Â
âNot really⊠I mean, I was hungry, but I didnât care if you ate⊠some of it, if that makes sense.âÂ
It doesnât. âWhatever, Iâm going to bed.â Her lip curls like she wants to add something, but she doesnât.Â
â⊠Alright.âÂ
âDonât worry about the pan. Iâll get it tomorrow.â And just like that, you shut the door on her again.Â
You donât have the energy to shower, so you undress and tuck yourself in. Your room is warmer than usual.Â
Ellieâs been acting differently since then.Â
For the past three days, sheâs been greeting you whenever youâre in her line of vision. She even mumbled hi before she took her seat in stats yesterday. Itâs awkward and stiff, but thereâs always a wave somewhere in her movements. You nod back at her every time.Â
Youâre not sure where your relationship lies with your roommate, but itâs not as⊠bad? Seeing her doesnât bother you as much as it did; You suppose itâs the same for her, too.Â
Youâre exhausted; Finals are around the corner, and youâre busting your ass. You had to get another job for the holiday season since itâs you and your dadâs first Christmas together since you were little, and you want to get him something nice.Â
All you need is a good nut and youâre set for the next two weeks. You miss Abby. Sheâs been just as busy with nonsense as you have, but you found time to see her later tonight.Â
Youâre stuck in the library trying to make the concept of categorical variables stick, but itâs not working. Youâre in a block because youâre thinking about Abby. She should be here to pick you up soon.Â
You slam your book shut when your phone goes off, a message from⊠Ellie.Â
You set your phone down with a small smile. What a weirdo.Â
You force yourself to study for another hour. Heavy hands clamp down on your shoulders and you shriek, other students looking up in confusion, your hand clasping over your mouth.Â
Abbyâs laughing behind you, warm breaths hitting your ear before she kisses your cheek.Â
âHi.â She whispers.Â
âHi yourself.âÂ
âPack that shit up.â Abby points at your books and messy stacks of paper. âLetâs roll.âÂ
You donât hesitate, shoving everything in your bag in anticipation of your nut. Your clitâs cheering; Sheâs finally happy.Â
Youâre warm, well-fed, and Abbyâs drilling the fuck out of you, but you canât cum.
Your face is shoved into your friendâs pillow; Sheâs hitting exactly where you need her to, and it feels good. Youâre tipping, but you havenât tipped. Youâve been on the verge of orgasming for the past ten minutes and itâs driving you crazy.Â
Your voice is barely there, âJust cuuum, just cum, just cumââ Youâre begging⊠yourself into her pillow.Â
Abby sounds so sexy behind you; Youâre shocked youâre not convulsing at the sound of her voice alone.Â
After some time, her hips slowed into a stop, tip nudged inside you.Â
â⊠You good?â She exhales.
You throw her two thumbs up. Youâre not good at all.Â
Abby snorts and pulls out, gently patting your hip, âSit up and talk to me.âÂ
Your legs give out from underneath you and you lay flat. Abby hands you a washcloth and you wipe between your legs while she unstraps her dick.Â
âI think Iâm broken.â You muffle into her slobbery pillowcase.Â
âYouâre not broken, youâre just not feeling it. Itâs fine.â
Sheâs too sweet. You want to cry, âIâm sorâ â
âDonât you dare. Finish your Wingstop.âÂ
âOkay.â You grumble.Â
Abby drops you off after the movie finishes. The red string that connects her clit to yours snaps as you waddle back up to your apartment.Â
You enter your shared home and youâre instantly freezing; Ellieâs not here. She hates sleeping when itâs cold.Â
You and your pussy sigh in relief. Just five minutes by yourself; thatâs all you need. Your shoes and backpack are thrown to the side in the nick of time, bursting through your bedroom door and rummaging through your drawer. Your cunt screams eureka when your vibrator turns on. You donât remember charging the son of a bitch!Â
Your pants and panties are lunged across your bedroom and you leap into bed. Your toyâs buzzing in your hand, and your walls squeeze in anticipation. Foreplay be damned.Â
Your eyes shut the second the vibrations hit your clit, trying to imagine a sweaty Abby on top of you, fucking you deep, choking you out. Your orgasm is right there, walls desperately trying to milk the brisk air around you. You shove two free fingers inside, and your muscles latch onto them, pulling them in deeper. Itâs right there, just a little more.Â
âPlease, please, câmon, fuckâ â
Your pleas go ignored. Your imagination has never failed you, so why canât you fucking cum?Â
Desperate sobs combine with your moans, brain filled with Abby, and Dina. Even Armani slips her way in there and youâve seen her twice in person, but itâs useless. Your peak never comes.Â
Youâre seconds away from shattering your window with your fucking vibrator. You and Ellie canât afford to get that shit fixedâ
Your clit jumps at the brief image of your roommate, pissed off and berating you about breaking a fucking window. You hate that you donât fight it, the visions of her and her strong arms, her twitchy nose, her dot-covered face. Itâs stirring something vicious in your tummy, and you canât keep your mouth shut.Â
You see her on top of you instead of Abby, her short hair loosening from her bun and framing her blushing face. Pretty, moss-filled eyes stare back at you, annoyance and bother replaced with something darker. Needier; She wants you to take from her.Â
âFuck, fuck, mmhâ â
Your hips buck when your positions switch in your mind, a blushing, spent Ellie, reaching for you, pulling you close, begging to touch her.Â
Youâre so loud when your orgasm splits your brain in two, your stress melting away in an instant, nasty, unspoken visuals of your pouty and weird housemate fluttering beneath your eyelids. You ride your high until you canât, vibrator clattering to the floor, walls flexing around nothing.Â
Youâre so tired that you donât bother moving. You pull the covers over your trembling form and knock out, not even bothering to turn your shaking toy off as it rattles on the hardwood.Â
Itâll be dead by the time Ellie comes home. If she does.Â
âŠ
âŠ
âŠ
Ellie lays on her side in her bed, knees pulled to her chest, her tattooed arm wrapped around her tummy and a hand covering her mouth. Her face is burning hot and her stomach is swirling. Whenever she blinks, she can see you, eyes rolled to the back of your head as you surrender to your release.Â
Her heart is racing and minutes away from crawling up her throat.Â
She completely forgets to put in that maintenance request for your broken heater; Sheâs warm enough under the covers for tonight.Â
A/N: hi again its finna pick up LEMME COOOOOK LEMME COOK
TAGGIES LOVE YALL MMMWAH : @starologist @hrtmal @ohlawdthebirds @villainousbear @timmy-27 @inf3ct3dd @aouiaa @shurisbigtoe @emothurman @lonelyfooryouonly @imelliesgf @baumbii @brackishkittie @littletinyladybugs @r1miese @horror-whoree @elsbunny222 @elliesatchel @makemescreamel @lav3nd3rhaze @elliezflower @ellieloml @ellies-princess @saverdelrey @womenofarcane @muthafuckingstargirl @mina-281 @yuckyfucky @aimformyheartt @elstoy @skylerwhitwyo @sawaagyapong @nil-eena @dewylittlestars @sakiigami @feelsoseencantdream @ellieslittlegf
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click!: in frame. 2 (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you crave redemption more than love. [idk au]
WORD COUNT: 11.5k
WARNINGS: professionalphotographer!ellie, strugglingartist!oc whoâs black, ANGST!!, daddy issues, SA/victim blaming :(, homophobia LOL, anger issues\violence, bad parenting, anxiety, joel standing on bidness, FLUFF!! :3, SMUT⊠MDNI, ellie bottoms YAAAS, virginity mentions, jealousyđ, dubcon (theyâre high), more fingering, brief mentions of cunning lunning, squirting, mult. big Os, err dassit
A/N: YYYYAASSSSSSSS hi⊠byeÂ
APRIL, 2014
Happy birthday, babe, you whisper in your girlfriendâs ear, arms wrapped around her neck from behind. Ceniyahâs giggly thank yous fill your ears and heart as you press smacking kisses on her cheek.Â
I made you something⊠You reach behind and grab the rolled-up poster paper sticking out of your backpack, making sure Ceniyah doesnât turn around. She seems giddy and your heart soars. You hope that all-nighter was worth it. Please, you pray to yourself, please love it.Â
Close your eyes and gimme your hand, you say and she listens, palm open in front of your face. You place the scroll in her hand and she gasps. She whips around to face you, shock written all over her, and you giggle. She unrolls the painting and her head instantly falls back, tears jerking behind her glasses.Â
Are you seriously crying right now! You pull her tight to your chest and she sobs into your neck, Câmon, baby, stop cryinâ! Sâokay. You coo and her arms tighten around your waist.Â
D-Dâyou like it? Your face burns when you whisper.Â
Are you fucking serious! She squeaks into your neck, Itâs beautiful, baby, I love it. T-Thank youâ
I love you so much, you mumble, and she says it back.Â
You havenât slept at all. Your bodyâs going to collapse soon. You hope itâs not during this phone call.Â
You ogle at the small card in your hand, pressing the digits into your device before hitting the call button. It rings twice before a bright voice answers.Â
âHello, this is Lisa Meyers speaking. How can I be of service?â
⊠Interesting intro. âGood morning, um, Professor Meyers?âÂ
âYes, how can I help you?âÂ
âI⊠we spoke at the coffee shop yesterday. About the⊠assisting art professors alumni thing.âÂ
âOh, of course! How are you, dear?â
âIâm good. Um⊠I was wondering if youâd have some time to speak with me about it... If thatâs cool.â
You can hear her wide smile through the line, âMore than cool! Would you be able to come into the office tomorrow?âÂ
An extra day in the city wouldnât hurt (it would), âNo problem. What time were you thinkinâ?âÂ
âMy mornings are always open! How does ten sound?âÂ
âSounds like a plan. Uh, thank you,â you say with twitchy fingers.Â
âCourse, hun! Iâll put you in and Iâll see you tomorrow!âÂ
You never expected to end up back here.Â
The campus art studio looks exactly the same, only now the old portraits, sculptures, ceramics that were lined up on shelves of the display case are all replaced with new, nameless ones. Youâre not used to seeing projects that you couldnât attach a name to in the classroom. Your university years never feel that long ago, but the randomly placed structures are proof of your long-term absence.Â
Time is an illusion⊠Or youâre getting old as fuck and about to be lowered into the ground. Freshmen make you sick(affectionately).Â
Professor Meyers explained the position well enough for you to manage on your own. The work youâre doing isnât difficult: oversee, assist in grading, oversee some more, oversee, and guide. Youâre practically getting a check for being the already observant individual that you are. Itâs a steal!Â
The position only lasts around a month, but Professor Meyers was convinced that it would only take someone as talented as you (her words⊠although you agree) a week to get on her toes. You vowed to bring your sketchbook every day from here on out, both to yourself and to her, in case you get the inkling of inspiration that you desperately need.Â
The jobâs a small win. Thatâs all you could ask for right now.Â
Fuck all that shit you said at the start of the week. TAing fucking sucks. And you still havenât had any inspiration despite all the efforts from the students! Whenever you pick up a utensil, you stab through your paper. Youâve officially lost your touch. Youâre a regular bitch with no talent! What the fuck is going on!Â
Youâve had numerous breakdowns in bathroom stalls since Monday, and youâre bound to have another one in the next fifteen seconds. Why the fuck did so many students leave their filled water cups on the fucking tables. Guess who has to clean all that shit up! You! Fuck freshman(unaffectionately).Â
Youâre so happy the halls are empty in between rotations. No one needs to watch you sobbingly wipe down tables splattered with paint.Â
After Professor Ronsonâs room is tidy, you start prepping the board for the next rotation of students. Theyâre learning about anatomy today; Thereâs bound to be at least three students that scribble tiny dicks in the corner of their starter pages. You hate it here.Â
You open the drawer to retrieve all the sharpeners, only to find the container completely empty. Youâre sick of the animators not putting shit back. You begrudgingly make your way back down the hall and into Professor Laceyâs room⊠You shouldâve never left.
Your lungs constrict with your gasp and you almost drop your keys.Â
A just as shocked Ellie gawks back at you, laminated name tag with YEARBOOK dangling from the camera strap around her neck.Â
What the fuck.
Ellieâs either hallucinating or dead. Yeah⊠She has to be dead. The haunting of your email was too much and she died and now sheâs seeing shitâ
An angel disguised as you is staring back at her, fist clenched under the sleeves of your sweater, brown eyes just as stunned as hers. Ellie barely has time to gather words before the chains hooked onto the pockets of your jeans jingle as you step out of the room and scurry down the hallway. Ellieâs feet are flying before she can even register their movements, hot on your trail as her camera bounces on her chest.Â
She manages to get close enough to grab your bicep, ignoring the stuttering in her heart when she sees the former light in your eyes replaced with something darker. The flourishing storm in your pupils is uncontrollable.Â
Ellie drops your arm when she realizes you wonât run, âW-What are you doing here?âÂ
Your gaze is locked onto the tile squares on the ground. âI-Iâm, uh⊠just enjoyinâ the weatherâ â
Ellieâs brows pull downward, eyes flicking towards the badge wrapped around your neck. Do you work here? âWeâre indoors.â She mumbles dryly.Â
âNothinâ like⊠the spring rain hittinâ the windows, am I right?â You huff with a nervous smile, eyes flitting around the hallway as you search for an escape. Ellieâs not having that.Â
âWe needa talk.âÂ
You sigh, âI canât. Iâm working.âÂ
âSo am I. Take your break,â Ellie grabs your wrist and drags you back down the hallway, leading you to the bathroom and pushing you into a stall, locking the door behind her.Â
Her voice is quiet when she presses, âThe fuck are you doing here?âÂ
Ellie expects you to snap, to push the same questioning back onto her, but you donât. Your mouth gapes like a fish as you stumble over words. Ellieâs eyes soften when she sees a shaky hand come up to pin a loc behind your ear. Youâre shaken up and she instantly notices something off. Your demeanor has shifted immensely since she last seen you and itâs making Ellieâs stomach twist with discomfort. She's never seen you this stunted.Â
âWhat.â Ellie asks when you mumble to the floor.Â
âIâm sorry about the email,â You sound winded, âI thought⊠I dunno. Iâm sorry about everythinâ.â Your lip starts to quiver as you ramble, âI wouldâve never come if I knew, Iâm sorryâ âÂ
⊠What the hell are you talking about? And why are you crying?Â
You sniffle and wipe your tears with your sleeves and Ellieâs fingers itch to comfort, to dry your face herself, but she doesnât. She watches you weep into your palms for what feels like hours, the air of the restroom suffocatingly tight.Â
âI didnât mean to ruin anything you h â had going on, okay? Iâm sorry⊠Iâll leave right now! Youâll never have to see me againâ â
Your sobs are stressing her, âG-Gimme your phone.â Ellie blurts.Â
You're already digging in your pocket for your device to unlock it, âW-Whyâ â
Ellie snatched it from your hand, heart pulling when she sees a photo of younger you being carried by a woman shoved in your case. The same face that was littered all over your apartment, âYou wanted to talk so bad, right?â Ellie presses her new number into the pad and calls herself, âYou have my number. MyâŠâÂ
When she looks up, her words get swallowed up; Your eyes still manage to glow under the⊠horrific bathroom lighting, glittering like stars in the late night. She clears her throat to catch herself, âMy shift ends at four. Call me any time after that.âÂ
Ellie hurries to unlock the stall before leaving you in the bathroom, heart in her throat as she heaves all the way down the hallway to the lounge, shaking her hands to get the jitters out.Â
She knew she shouldâve never accepted a call from the alumnus association. Fuck the yearbook.Â
You clock out with a heavy, anxious heart.Â
Three students came up to you and asked for advice on their starter shapes. They were a bit upset when their circles didnât come out perfect, and you almost cried. It was too sweet. Your bag bounces off your back as you descend the staircase to exit the building. The droplets hit your hood with fever as you skip to your car. You jump into the driverâs seat to turn the heat on, teeth chattering from the evening breeze.Â
You check the time on your dash and⊠itâs way past four. You hope Ellieâs willing to meet. You dial the most recent number and tremble as the phone rings. She answers after the second tone.Â
âHello?âÂ
She sounds so relaxed, and your shoulders unlock, â⊠Hi. Itâs⊠me?âÂ
A lengthy pause, â⊠Me who?âÂ
You hide a snort, âUm⊠ex-roomie?â She chuckles lightly. âHi.â
â⊠Hi.â You whisper, âDid you, um⊠still wanna talk to me?â You think you hear the click of a lighter.Â
âMhm. Iâll send you where I stay at.âÂ
âOkay⊠Iâll see you soon?âÂ
âYup.â And with that, the line goes dead. Ellieâs location delivers not even a minute later. Her hotel isnât far from here. . . and fuck, it looks like wealth. Your nerves are nowhere near settled after your last attempt at reconciliation, and paranoia is itching beneath your skin.Â
You open your GPS and blast your screamo playlist, hollering your way down the street with your windows down, rain be damned.Â
Youâre burning holes through Ellieâs hotel room door.Â
You havenât knocked, you havenât rang. . . you're not even sure if your text of arrival went through. You just stare at the peephole with a clenched jaw. This big bag of Cool Ranch Doritos is doing an excellent job as a stress ball. Itâs bound to pop from your grip soon.
Your bladder almost lets loose when the door gets pulled open, nostrils instantly hit with wafts of that forbidden flower. Youâre pulled through the small crack by a strong grip before the door is shut and locked behind you.Â
Ellie faces you, bare arms on display, and leans back against the door⊠in those fucking grey sweats. After all this time, they still cause damage to your soul, âSorry. I donât wanna get kicked out.âÂ
âItâs⊠youâre good.â You point behind her, trying not to gawk at her tattoo, âHowâd you knowâ â
âYou breathe loud.â She says simply, tone hushed and raspy. She nods behind you, âSit down.âÂ
She follows you to the lounge chairs that face each other. You sit, still tense, suddenly back in therapy, âI-I brought you somethinâ.â You push the crumpled bag of chips towards her as she relights her joint.Â
Her pink, doe-eyes flit between yours and the bag before she mumbles, âThank you.âÂ
âNo problemâŠâ You awkwardly set them on the windowsill, swallowing your guilt and deciding to take initiative, âI⊠I know you have a lot of things going on and I donât wanna take up too much of your time⊠Iâm justâŠâÂ
The loud splattering of raindrops is nerve-wracking, âI wasnât⊠I didnât treat you well. College was a very hard time for me and I didnât really know how to deal with it without being a bitchââÂ
Carbon leaves her nose, âIs that your excuse?â
âN-No, no! Iâm not⊠Iâm not tryna avoid blame. I was terrible and you â no one deserved what I put them through⊠I-Iâm really sorry, Ellie⊠From the bottom of my heart, Iâm sorry.â
Ellieâs silent. You have no idea what sheâs thinking; She could be plotting to get you kicked out of her room right now and you wouldnât know. Her stare isnât angry, it isnât anything⊠she just watches you. Every squeeze of your hands, bounce of your knee, every tic photographed in her memory. Just like before.Â
âWhy're you back on campus?âÂ
You exhale the breath youâd been holding, âUm⊠I gotta, like, TA job, I guess. With the art profs.â Â
âStill doing art, then, I guess.â
You stare down at your lap, âYeah. Trying to.â You croak.Â
âTrying?â She asks, brows furrowed. Your shoulders bounce in a shrug. âI, err, hadnât made anything in a while so⊠yeah. I thought itâd get me back into it.âÂ
âAre you?âÂ
âHm?â
âAre you back into it?âÂ
âI donât know yet.âÂ
âWhy were you so upset when I moved out?â Ellieâs tone shifts into something much more delicate, ready to crack and bleed open at any given moment. You canât tell her, your brain bellows over the pleads from your heart. You canât tell her how much you missed her!
Your jaw slacks dumbly as you search for a believable explanation, mind blanking under her scrutinizing stare.Â
âI was drunk. I-I donât rememberâŠâÂ
âYou were drunk and donât remember.â You cringe at her tone.Â
âEllie⊠I donât wannaâ â
âDonât wanna what? Actually be fucking honest?â Your babbles are silenced as she rants. âYou reached out to me and you canât even answer one question honestly. Whyâd you even come?â She seems so disappointed in your response, but what can you do? Tell her how every part of your body yearns to be next to her? How you almost collapse when you saw her for the first time in what felt like an eternity? How manipulative would that be after everything youâve done?
Ellieâs index finger jumps on the armrest as silence takes over once more. Sheâs deep in thought, it seems, teeth nipping at the skin of her lip.Â
âEllieâ â
âWhen I moved outâŠâ She repeats sternly, âyou told me you didnât want me to go. Why did you say that?âÂ
Itâs on the tip of your tongue: because Iâm weak and I like you! Iâm sorry I didnât fight! Iâm sorry, I'm sorry, Iâm sorry!Â
âB-Because I didnât want you to goâŠâ You whisper between sniffles, wiping your nose with your sleeve.Â
âWhy's that?âÂ
âI⊠really liked having you aroundâŠâ You chose your words very carefully, but theyâre not a lie. âYouâre⊠youâre really nice.âÂ
That seems to satisfy her a little, âIâm really nice?â Ellieâs brow quirks, a tiny smile blossoming on her face.Â
âAnd funny.â You sob, âLike, I laughed a lot.âÂ
âYouâre funny, too,â Ellie says awkwardly while scratching her ear. Your heart pulses.Â
Her eyes search yours, âI didnât know how I would react when you got here. The thought of seeing you really⊠fucking freaked me out.â She scoffs to herself, and your shoulders begin to droop. âBut⊠um...â She pauses and your pulse pounds in your neck. Tears brim in your ducts. This is when she tells you to leave. To fuck off. To drop dead, for fucks sakeâ
âIâm glad you reached out.âÂ
You gawk in disbelief before your bottom lip trembles, âReally?â You ask meekly. She simply nods.Â
âMe, too.â Youâre really trying not to cry right now, but the softness in her gaze isnât helping. Sheâs too sweet. You change the topic before you say something youâll regret. You point to the bag of chips, âI really hope you like that flavor. I just grabbed it because I was overthinking.âÂ
âI donât know why you bought those. I still owe you a bag from what I remember,â She grabs them, squeezing the end until the other side pops open. She grabs four ships and crunches them all at once before extending the bag to you. You follow her lead and munch to your heart's content.Â
âI was never mad at you, yâknow.â Ellie sets the bag down and reignites her roach. âI wasnât, uh, innocent, either. We both fucked up,â She puffs and hands it to you. You've never smoked bud before, only stole a couple of Abbyâs edibles a while back. She vowed never to smoke with you since youâre a tweaker.Â
You accept the charred-to-hell baby jay and stare at it. You shrug, âWasnât worse than me. How do I do this without burning my finger off?âÂ
âErr⊠just breathe in and hold it.â She instructs. âHave you never gotten high?âÂ
âI have. I don'tâ â
âOh, yeaaah. Non-smoker. Sorry.âÂ
âItâs fine,â you mumble before bringing the remnants up to your lips and sucking in. Nothing happens. Ellie snickers, âNot like that. Itâs not a fucking lollipop. Just, like, fill your cheeks up and hold it.âÂ
⊠Are you an idiot? âI donât know what that means.â Ellie cackles like a witch at your lost expression, nearly falling over in her chair. Your cheeks burn and you try again, cheeks expanding to fill in the smoke. The second you inhale, you start choking, eyes bulging out of your skull from the burn in your chest.Â
Ellie finds your near-death experience fucking hysterical as she hollers from her seat. Tears stream down your face and the veins in your neck are bulging as you gasp for air. Youâre never doing this shit again. Your lungs finally decide to spare you when Ellie passes you water from her dresser. You gulp that shit down like no tomorrow as Ellieâs giggles dwindle.Â
âWhat the,â cough, âfuckâ â
âFucking baby lungs,â Ellie mumbles with a grin. âYouâll be fine after a couple tries.âÂ
You chug more water, âGirl⊠fuck you.â You gasp. Ellieâs grin turns cocky when her head tilts.Â
âFuck me?â Her voice lowers and goosebumps rise on your skin. Your heart stops in your chest and your gaze falls to the floor as your tummy swirls in delight, cheeks fiery. You stand and Ellie sits up at your sudden alertness.Â
âUm⊠Like I said, thank you for taking the time to talk to me today. I really appreciate it.â Ellie stands to grab your arm when your feet slowly start backing towards the door.Â
Her smile drops, âI-Iâm sorry. I was just kiddingââÂ
âNo, itâs fine! Itâs not you! I just, uh⊠yâknow what I mean?âÂ
â⊠No.â She mumbles, âYou donât⊠have to go yet. You just got here.â She chuckles weakly.Â
âI just⊠donât wanna⊠pry.â You whisper like itâs shameful. Ellieâs head shakes in denial, âYouâre not! Iâm⊠inviting you.âÂ
Your eyes beg her to understand where youâre coming from. Itâs not like you donât want to, but the two of you just got back cool three seconds ago. The last thing you want to do is force yourself back into her life. Your relationship needs time to marinate and heal before anything else happens⊠if she allows it.Â
âI⊠I still miss Pickle?â You suggest with bright eyes, and Ellieâs soften despite her confusion. âWould it be okay if I see her?â You ask quietly.Â
Her mouth turns upwards, âHow long are you in town?âÂ
âI donât know⊠These hotel bills are runninâ my credit in the fucking mud.â You sigh.Â
âSheâs with my dad right now. Come this weekend. Iâm outta here on Friday, anyways.â She suggests, cheeks glowing in the dimming room. You hope Ellie doesnât notice your dejection at the mention of her father⊠It still stings. Her eyes are so hopeful, meadows flurrying with excitement⊠and you canât say no.Â
ââŠOkay.âÂ
âYeah?â She confirms, smile widening. You nod. âShe misses you like crazy.â Ellie notes and tears get to cooking. You think about Pickle every day. Little munchkin.Â
âI miss her, too.â You sniffle. The hand that rests on your bicep slowly slides down your sleeve, closing around your wrist. Not strong, but her hold is steady. Ellie whispers your name.Â
âHm?âÂ
âIâm glad weâre⊠okay.â Your heart soars with adoration. Her eyes explore your face in admiration, and your body glows.Â
âMe, too. Thank you.â Ellieâs gentle gaze drops to your lips and you stiffen. Your hands clench when she moves an inch closer. It kills you to move away, and an inkling of hurt overcasts in her forest. She lets you go and backs away, âSorryâ â
Your head shakes desperately, âSâokay, I just think we should⊠move⊠slower?â You never fail to sound like an alien who just arrived on Earth, but Ellie seems to get it.Â
âYeah, I⊠yeah.â Ellie stares at her sock-covered feet, red dusting her cheeks. You try to hide a smile while she walks you towards her door. She opens it for you, propping up against it.Â
âSee you Friday?â You throw over your shoulder and Ellie grins. âSee you Friday.â She parrots. You canât stop cheesing even after she closes the door. You make your way back into your driverâs seat, heart bleeding with relief.Â
MAY, 2014
Her record is clean! I wouldâve never expected this from such a great kid, your professor says to your father, But violence, especially to this extreme, is completely unacceptableâ
What about what he did to me! You shout, and your father glares at your tone, He put his hands on me first! H-Heâ
Your body shudders in disgust at the recall of your classmate touching you the way he did. You were on your way to class when hands enclosed around your chest in a tight squeeze, all oxygen leaving your body. It was abrasive and made your skin crawl, and you swung. Your arms moved on their own until you were on top of him, his nose gushing blood while his friends attempted to pry you off.Â
There was laughter when he groped you. So many people â students that you see every day â all watched it, and no one came to your defense.Â
Your principal sighs with his palms up, Iâm just trying to get to the bottom of what happenedâ
No, youâre not! I already told you what happened and youâre tryna make it seem like Iâm lying! You stand and grab your bag off the floor, stomping towards the door to the office, Yâall can chokeâ
Your dad calls out for you, and your fingers twitch at his tone, but you keep walking, pushing past the double-doors of the school and towards the bike rack. Tears flood your eyes when the double doors slam shut, your father berating you about making a scene in public. You unlock your ride, blocking out his rampage that draws the security guardâs attention.Â
He put his hands on me, dad! You shriek as loud as you can between your cries, He put his hands on me! Whyâre you yellinâ at me?
Iâm not yelling at you! Iâm yelling in general! You scoff and swing your leg over your bike, strapping your helmet on, Iâm tryna understand what happened! You broke his goddamn nose! Theyâre boutta suspend you!Â
Imma be at Mayaâs, you say, monotone. Iâll see you later.Â
Amaya isnât even home. Your dadâs hollering his lungs out as you ride down the sidewalk, but you block it all out until the wind fills your ears like a monsoon. Youâre not sure where youâre going, but itâs somewhere.Â
Hopefully somewhere you can cry to yourself without disturbance.Â
-
-
-
Itâs your first day back at school since being suspended. Fuck everybody⊠except Amaya and Ceniyah. You probably wouldâve switched schools if it wasnât for them. You canât wait to see them during lunch and tell them how fucked up itâs been staying at home.Â
Today has been weird as fuck, to say the least. Friends that youâve grown used to talking to in the hallways have either disappeared or ignored you. Itâs quiet around you, now, and youâre on edge. What the fuck is going on?
Walking into the cafeteria is frightening. Itâs always loud, rowdy, hectic, but the minute you step foot inside, everything seems to stop. You grip your tray so tight; you think itâs about to snap, frantically searching for your girlfriend.Â
But your two favorite people are nowhere to be seen. You wander and come up empty-handed. Where the fuck are theyâ
Your thoughts are cut when a shoulder shoves right into yours. You throw your tray onto the nearest table. Laughter surrounds you before a snarky voice shriek in your ears.
Watch where the fuck youâre going,Â
No, you watch where the fuck youâre going. Dumb ass bitch, You spit. You're about to get suspended for knocking this broad out. Who even is this?Â
Coming from the slut who cheated on her girlfriend! Are you sure youâre a lesbian? Or are you going back to dick?Â
The entire room seems to collapse from top to bottom, crushing you beneath clutter in attempts to suffocate. You freeze when everyone turns to stare at the scene, some standing to surround you, hoping to see a fight. You release a shuddering breath as your fist clench.Â
⊠Cheated on your girlfriend? You love your girlfriend. Youâre in love with your girlfriend, and sheâs in love with you! What the fuck is this bitch talking about.Â
I think sheâs going back to dick! One of them laughs, and the rest follow, and the entire room glows red.Â
Your knuckles are drenched in the color when your dad comes to pick you up.Â
PRESENT
Maybe being a TA is helping. Youâve finally pulled your sketchbook out of your work bag.Â
The point of your fine liner hovers over a blank page of your sketchbook. You canât stop thinking about Ellie, and you donât have many distractions.Â
Itâs been so long since youâve created anything, and frankly, your ass is clenched with anxiety. Never in your life would you think that creating art would wrack your nerves in such a way, but your insecurities are working hard. Probably the hardest they ever have. Once upon a time, your sketchbook was your safe haven, and now the feeling of blank pages feels like needles.Â
What if youâve⊠lost your talent? You can see everything you want to make clearly in your head but your pen isnât moving. The attempts at reigniting your passion would be pointless if you can no longer fucking draw. Your fingers are itching.Â
Maybe you should try that corny shit from the movies where they close their eyes and move their utensils on pure muscle memory⊠Maybe you should do fucking shrooms! Visuals always peak on psyches, according to the experts. At this point, why the fuck notâÂ
âSon of a fucking â this is fucking stupid, bitch, jusâ fuckinâ draw,â you mutter to yourself in agitation. Just fucking draw! You do this! You do this, you do this!
Minutes pass and your paper is mussed with smudged, small ink marks from constantly moving your pen around, trying to find the right angle. Another piece of paper gone to waste. You fucking suck. You slam your pen down on the table.Â
You stand and start to pace, âPositive affirmations only,â You remind yourself aloud, âYou got this shit, like, what the fuck. Everythingâs gonna come back to you. Youâre in a funk and thaâsit. Itâll pass, itâll passâ â
Whoever your hotel neighbor is⊠Praying for their sleep schedule.Â
Itâs going to be a long night.Â
âHello?â
âHi, kiddo. Sorry I missed your call. Your pet knocked out on my hand.âÂ
Ellie giggles, âItâs cool. How ya been?â
âFine⊠Sheâs a rascal, ainât she? I found her head first in one of my flower pots. Her tiny legs were wiggling tryna get herself out,â His chuckles are like warm hugs, âHowâs work?â
Ellieâs cackles calm, âAlso fine⊠ErrâŠUm⊠speaking of PickleâŠâÂ
Her dad hums, and Ellie sighs, âRemember when I told you about how I found her?âÂ
âYeah⊠You and that girl found the poor thing freezing to death outside⊠Why?â
â⊠Would you believe me if I said we somehow reunited by the grace of God and sheâs coming back with me tomorrow?â Ellie squeaks, and her confidence drops when he exhales. It sounds heavy.Â
âUm⊠for what?âÂ
âTo see PickleâŠâ
ââŠAlright.â
âWhatâre you thinkinâ,â She nips at her nails.Â
âNothinââŠâÂ
âDadâŠâÂ
âI dunno what you want me to say, darlinâ⊠Everything youâve told me about her so far wasnât⊠great to hear.âÂ
Ellie rolls onto her back, âYeah⊠I dunno. Somethingâs different about her now.âÂ
âHow so?âÂ
She canât tell him how badly your shielded eyes have taken a toll on her. How desperately she wants them to revert to the shining rivers they used to be. How badly her chest ached when you left her room last night, âI dunno. It just isâŠâ She mutters weakly. Another heavy sigh.Â
âI mean⊠Youâre an adult. I canât tell you what to do anymore.âÂ
âDonât be like that, please.âÂ
âNot being like anything. I can only accept.âÂ
Ellieâs hand drags down her face in exasperation. The rants she relinquished onto her dad about you are making her nauseas.Â
âJust⊠be nice to her, please.â He hums begrudgingly.Â
âDad, Iâm serious. I feel like we⊠could be friends.âÂ
âFriends⊠Alright.â He sounds skeptical, but he isnât combative. She hopes heâll keep it together when he sees you, âHow should I plan for this friend when she gets here?â
Ellie smiles sadly, âMake eggplant parmesanâŠâ
Her dad snorts, â⊠Since when do you like eggplant?âÂ
Ellie grins, âI donât.âÂ
Why canât black roses be real?Â
Ellie doesnât seem like a flower girl, but she has a gigantic leaf imprinted on her arm for the rest of her life; She must appreciate the autotroph kingdom. Your mother always told you how fucked it is to enter peopleâs homes empty handed. Walmart usually pulls through with the awkward housewarming gifts, but theyâre slacking in their garden selection today. Fuck your life.Â
Youâre forced to settle on peonies⊠Theyâre pretty and all, but youâd prefer alliums for her. Maybe even a carnation. Plus, Amaya always told you to never buy flowers that sound like penis.Â
Amaya⊠Are you really about to break down in the frozen food section? Maybe. Itâs time to go. You're shocked to find out you have more than ten dollars on your card. Fuck hotels, from the depths of your soul.Â
You set your purchase in the passengerâs side and pull up Ellieâs pinged location. She left way earlier than you. You wouldâve carpooled, but you couldnât miss these hours for this paycheck. How are you a struggling student and not even in school?Â
The drive is going to be long.Â
At least you have time to scream out your frustrations.Â
âHey, Siri.âÂ
⊠UH HUH?
âPlay This Cold Black by Slipknot.âÂ
PLAYING THIS COLD BLACK BY SLIPKNOT.Â
Your head thrashes as you back out of your parking spot.Â
âWELCOME HOOOâ â
The ride wasnât long enough, actually. Ellieâs dadâs house is right there. Like⊠right fucking there, and your voice is almost gone. Clouds are beginning to roll in over the neighborhood. The universe is fucking with you. Great.Â
You dump the last bits of water into the thirty-dollar, peony-stuffed vase before exiting your car, backpack strapped over your shoulder. You climb the brick staircase with a pounding heart.Â
âOkay,â You croak, âHi. Nice to meet you, Mr. Miller. I heard my â our cat was with youââ You rehearse and cringe. Why are you pressing him about a cat in his domain?Â
âFuck, okay, wait,â You try again, âHi, Mr. Miller, Iâm Ellieâs, uh, friend. We were roommates some time agoâ âÂ
Some time ago? Who the fuck are you? Shakespeare? Emily fucking BrontĂ«? Get a fucking grip.Â
You almost drop the fucking vase when the door opens. Your coughs are uncontrollable when you see Ellie, eyes flicking between you and the ring light camera. Why the fuck does she look so good? Cartier watch, black button up and slacks, hair⊠neat. Sheâs about to trigger your asthma!Â
âUh⊠you okay?â She questions flatly. Youâre still choking on your own esophagus, but you send her two thumbs up anyway. Youâre great! Terrific! Immediately scared shitless when a⊠big ass man holding a black furball creeps up behind her. Heâs not as dolled-up as Ellie and it makes you less insecure. Why the fuck do you have this hoodie on? You shouldâve at least worn some trousers!Â
âNice to meet you.â His voice sounds like grovel. Gravel? You canât fucking think right now! He adjusts Pickle in his grasp so he can extend a polite hand out to you, âIâm Joel. Iâm Ellieâs father,â He sounds courteous, but thereâs something simmering beneath his pupils as he stares at you.Â
His grip is strong when you accept it. Youâre going to vomit, âI-Iâm â I mean, hi, Iâm, uh⊠Meân Ellie used to live togetherââ You sound like a frog who just learned how to speak.Â
âIâve been told.â He hums.
Meow!
You almost start bawling at your babyâs cry. She's so big now and her coat is so shiny! Sheâs eating well. Ellie accepts the flowers with dusted cheeks before stepping aside and allowing you entry. Youâre instantly hit with the smell of garlic⊠Can the whole bloodline throw down in the kitchen?Â
âNice home!â You crack and cringe. You cringe so fucking hard. They both say thanks in unison, but her fatherâs is gruff while Ellieâs is delicate like petals. She canât stop staring down at the flowers. Joel finally sets Pickle down so he can head back into the kitchen, and she follows him without hesitation.Â
She doesnât remember you. Your heart shatters.Â
âThank you for the flowers,â You hear Ellie say from beside you. You swallow the lump forming in your throat with a smile. âNo problem⊠You look, um, great.â And you smell like heaven. Like clouds before the rain.Â
Her face gets redder and she grins behind petals, âThank you. I got called in today. For⊠editing and whatnot.â Â
You snicker, âWhatnot?âÂ
âShut up. Câmon.â You follow her into the kitchen where she sets the vase in the middle of the dining table before waddling towards her dad, who stands over the stove. You stand back and watch as she playfully punches his upper arm while he stirs the simmering pot, cracking jokes amongst themselves while Pickle paws at Ellieâs calf. Your doting smile vanishes at their laughter; What a little happy family. Are you breathing?Â
You turn to face the living room and breathe in as deep as you can, eyes glued to their maroon couch. You crack your knuckles and release the wind in your lungs before repeating.Â
âYouâre okay, itâs okay. You knew what it was before you came,â you whisper to yourself. Ellie mentioned how close her and her dad were way before you got here, so why is the pain in your chest so sharp?Â
A hand comes down on your shoulder and you jump, âSor â fuck, sorry â â
âAre you okay?â Ellie asks, concerned.Â
âYeah! Yeah, Iâm fine! Jusâ looking around,â You laugh shakily and note the large paper crane on the TV stand. You point at it, âThatâs so cool! Did you make that? I love origami.âÂ
âNo, my dad didâ â
Fuck, âOhâ â
âYeah, umâ â
âD-Do you have a restroom?âÂ
She observes with worry, â⊠Yeah, right down that hall, to the leftâ â
âThank you, BRB,â Youâre practically running to the fucking bathroom. The door closes and locks and you pace. They have a nice shower curtain: black and white stripes. You count them all from top to bottom.Â
âYour dadâs dead, fucking relax, itâs been like that, itâs been like that,â You exhale shakily, tremors building in your hands, âYouâre fine, youâre fine, calm the fuck down.â You unzip your hoodie and ball it up before shoving your face in it. Your screams into it are muffled.Â
You come up for air and stare into the mirror, âYouâre fucking fine. The food smells good as fuck and youâre gonna eat and youâre fine.â You open the door and⊠kittyâs staring at you. Sheâs sitting pretty and inspecting your disheveled appearance.Â
âHi, baby. Remember me?â You squat and stick your hand out to her. She sniffs curiously before nipping at your pinky. âOw,â you coo with a smile.Â
âShe remembers you.âÂ
Ellieâs leaning against the wall with her arms folded over her chest. You need her to stomp the fuck out of you with affection; She looks so fucking good, fuckâ
âI hope,â you squeak and cough. It scares the shit out of Pickle and she runs.Â
Ellieâs gaze lingers on your bare arms. âCan we talk for a sec?â
âYup.â Sound casual, you think. You sprinkle a shrug in there. She nods before heading down the hall and entering the last door. You canât hide your shocked expression at the scenery.Â
Every inch of the room is covered in posters, most of them about galaxies and all their intricacies. Thereâs a red racecar bed covered in Regular Show sheets and pillowcases and a bunch of stuffed animals, dresser covered with discarded sticker papers and seemingly empty polaroid cameras. There are fairy lights dangling from the ceiling before coming down and around the bed frame, across the closet, and finally slung over her dresser. Thereâs little action figures and trinkets everywhere.Â
The door closes behind you, â⊠Is this your room?âÂ
Ellie snorts, âIt was. Not anymore.âÂ
You laugh, âIâm fuckinâ with it. That bed is crazy, though.â Ellie joins in, scratching at her ear. She takes a few steps until sheâs in front of you, still at a distance. Thank God; Any closer and your celibacy goes down the drain.Â
âSorry I only brought flowers. I wouldâve brought fucking⊠cake or something if I knew yâall were gonna cook.â Ellie waves you off.Â
âThe flowers were pretty. Thank you.âÂ
Your entire face is on fire, âYâknow what I meanâŠâ You cough.Â
âUm⊠I just wanted to talk to you about something. About my dad.âÂ
Thereâs a hole in your chest thatâs expanding. She takes your silence as attentive, âHe can be really overprotective⊠like, heâs kinda stubborn.â
âOh⊠I see where you get it from,â You laugh weakly, clearing your throat when Ellie doesnât. âSorry.â You mumble. Ellie looks down at her feet, âDoes he not⊠like me?â You ask quietly, embarrassed out of your fucking mind.Â
âItâs not that, heâs just⊠I told him a little of what happened between us. Not everything, just some of it!âÂ
âThe⊠bad part, Iâm assuming?â Her silence is enough confirmation.Â
Ellie looks like Pickle when sheâs guilty. You remember when she hopped onto the counter and knocked over your water cup, eyes large and pleading for forgiveness over the mess she caused.Â
âMânot mad,â You mumble, âI probably wouldâve done the same thing.â Probably is used very strongly.Â
âIâm sorrâ â
âItâs okayâ â
A knock comes from the other side of the door.Â
âCome eat, you two!âÂ
âComing!â Ellie yells back before rubbing her hands together. âIâm reallyâ âÂ
âEllie, itâs fine,â You reassure her with a light slap on her bicep⊠Itâs quite hard. âCâmon, uh⊠Iâm hungry?â You brush past her and head towards the door, holding it open for her. âAfter you?â
Ellie reminds you of a strawberry milk squishmallow when she eases past you, trying to hide her smile and pink cheeks. Your cheeks puff as you release the air in your lungs, shutting her door behind you.Â
This is the best eggplant parmesan youâve ever tasted in your goddamn life. Too bad you canât enjoy it due to Ellieâs hardcore mobster dad sending you deadly glares from across the table. He hasnât said a word this entire meal, and youâre not anticipating the minute he does. Heâs going to blow a gasket.Â
âDâyou like it?â Ellie says lowly from beside you. You nod your head with two thumbs up. You canât hide your smile when you notice all the gooey cheese and noodles eaten off the pieces of eggplant.Â
âItâs delicious. Thanks Mr. Miller.âÂ
âDonât mention it.â He sounds like he means it. Your heart drops and Ellie scowls at him. Your fingers clench around your fork and you scarf down what you can. Itâs so good and youâre so scared and you want this meal to be over.Â
You're the last to clean your plate so you stand in a rush, gathering all of the plates and spoons off the table before scurrying to the sink.Â
Ellie pads close behind you, âOh, you donât have toâ â
You cut Ellie off with a nervous laugh, âThe least I could do.â The dishes clatter and you grab a sudsy sponge. You waste no time, scrubbing the living hell out of these dishes.Â
âGo sit down, Ellie.âÂ
The hairs on the back of your neck stand at his stern tone, âWhaâ â
He slices through her refute, and still manages to sound calm, âGo.âÂ
You continue to scrub, sighing at Ellie's descending stomps. Joel creeps into the open space in front of the sink, grabbing a dish and another sponge.Â
âEllie told me youâre an artist.â He mutters over the running water.
âYeah. Sorta.â You reply as calmly as you can.Â
âWhat are your intentions with my daughter?â He gets right to it, it seems. You scrub harder.Â
âJust⊠tryna make things right between us.âÂ
âWhy's that?âÂ
Word vomit. You canât help yourself. Youâre so fucking nervous. âI-I fuc â sorry â I screwed over someone that was⊠really great. Your daughterâs a sweetheart and I feel awful with how things left off.â You stumble with a heated face. You catch the arch in his eyebrow and back pedal, âNot like we were â we werenât dating or anything! Like, not like that! We just â â
âI was a student once upon a time. I know how these things go.â He snickers humorlessly. Your shoulders relax a smidge before he asks, âWhy now?âÂ
âHm?âÂ
âWhyâd you wait so long to talk to her? The two of you graduated forever ago.â His tone is much calmer than it was seconds ago, but anxiety surges in your gut at his questioning.Â
âI didnât wanna reach out without being in the right headspace. I had⊠a lot going on and I had to handle it. Therapyâs hard as fu â heck,â You sigh, âI still donât think Iâm doinâ a good job, but⊠I dunno, it earned me a Michelin star eggplant parm. Must be doing something right.âÂ
You donât expect Joel to laugh, but he does. Itâs hearty and deep. Very dad-esque. Your heart crushes to dust all over again.Â
âLook, kid,â Joel sets the clean plate in the rack before grabbing another, âI wasnât gonna say much, but Ellie seems to like you⊠a lot. More than most people.â Your heart flurries back into shape at his observation. You want to ask what a lot means exactly, but he continues.Â
âSheâs⊠she gets very attached to people. I know itâs hard to believe but sheâs very⊠sensitive,â His voice is low, but heâs not bullshitting in the slightest. The protective aura has returned and itâs radiating back onto you, pushing you back. Keeping you at a distance from him. From Ellie, âIâm never gonna shit on anyoneâs journey, but frankly⊠if youâre not here to stay, Iâd suggest leaving her alone now.â
This is definitely a threat. But you donât feel threatened. You feel⊠sad. Joel is doing what any great dad would when faced with an outsider: armoring his cubs by any means. Something youâve never experienced. If meeting Joel has shown you anything, itâs been what youâve missed out on your entire life. Little does he know the last thing you want to do is separate from Ellie a second time. Another breakdown is bound to crash into you very soon. You forgot where the bathroom was.Â
Youâre not going anywhere. Your heart wonât allow it. âIâmâ â
Youâre interrupted by a loud rumble, instantly followed by the heavy droplets of pouring rain. It sounds like pebbles are being thrown at all windows of their home; Is it hailing?Â
âHoly shit,â Ellie calls from the living room window, âWas it supposed to storm tonight?âÂ
âYeah, it was on the news,â Joel confirms. Ellie rushes over and points her eyes to you.Â
âYouâre not driving in that.â She breathes out. Your heart fist pumps, but you maintain nonchalance.Â
You shrug awkwardly, âI donât wanna pryâ âÂ
âNah, sheâs right. We have a guest room.â Joel sighs, âEllie, show her where it is. Iâll finish up in here.âÂ
Ellieâs hand closes around your wrist before guiding you down the hall. The bathroomâs right across from the guest room. On the left side, you note.Â
âFuck a guest room. Youâre staying with me.â She mumbles and opens the cupboard. She grabs you some sleep shorts and presumably her fatherâs sweatshirts. You try to convince yourself that the strong pounds in your chest are from fear of the storm, and not at all from a lesbian slumber party.Â
⊠Fuck.Â
The storm is roaring outside. And Ellieâs chiefing in neon astronaut jammies. This feels like a fever dream.Â
âThey glow in the dark.â Ellie hums around a cloud of smoke from where she sits across from you on the bed. You pause your gawking, âHuh?â
âMy pjs glow in the dark. Wanna see?â Her eyes sparkle and your heart sprouts legs and sprints around in your ribcage.Â
âFuck yeah.â You gasp. Ellieâs teeth shine before she puts her joint between her lips and leans across her bed to shut her lamp off. Every fiber of your being tries to not lock onto the smidge of skin that appears from under her sweatshirt when she stretches. The room goes dark around the neon pink and green outlines of the design. You choke out a laugh at the pigmentation; How the fuck are they so bright!
âSorry if this is boring. Iâve never had a sleepover before.âÂ
âShut up, thatâs cool as fuck! You gotta battery pack in there or somethinâ?â Ellie giggles out a no. A smile stretches wide across your face when you look up at her, hers just as bright. âAre you sleepy?â You ask.Â
âNot at all,â she hums as she switches the lamp back on.Â
âWe could play a gaaame,â You suggest sing-songy.Â
âOh, fuck. Like what.â Ellie huffs a laugh.Â
âTruth or dare is a sleepover classicâ â
âIâm not licking a toilet seat.â Ellie states flatly. Laughter explodes from you at her face. âIâm not a crazy dare-er like that. The most youâll have to do is prank call an ex or some shit.âÂ
âI donât have an ex.âÂ
âOh⊠Well, a family member.â Ellie nods in acceptance. âCan I ask first?â She asks.Â
âMhm. Lay it on me.âÂ
âTruth or dare?âÂ
âDare.âÂ
âShow me whatâs in your backpack.âÂ
ââŠFuck.â You sigh, and Ellie cackles. âWere you planning this shit?â You ask and stand, walking over to the dresser where your bag sits. You grab it and hand it to her. She wastes no time, stubbing her joint out before rummaging through your shit, sifting through loose-leaf paper and markers used for coloring. You plop down onto her bed and she pulls out your sketchbook.Â
âIs it okay if I look?âÂ
âI dunno,â You smirk, âCan I finally see your fucking portfolio?âÂ
âCome home with me tomorrow,â she says instantaneously, âItâs there. You can see it.âÂ
â⊠Then yes.âÂ
She flips through pages and pages of visuals youâve created before your fatherâs passing. They range from sloppily scribbled orchids, to immaculately shaded depictions of eggplant farms. Ellie giggles when she finds a small comic of Pickle playing with her favorite mouse toy.Â
âShe still has it.â
âGood,â you whisper. You watch as she studies each page to her heartâs content, fingers dragging across lines that catch her attention. âYouâre so good,â she says softly, awestruck and eyes sincere. Your gaze drops to your lap.Â
âThanks,â you match her volume. She hums and flips to the next page. You eye the ashtray on her bed before snagging it, snatching her lighter and igniting the joint. Ellie eyes you like a hawk.Â
âI watched a tutorial on how to become a professional pothead⊠I think I got it down.âÂ
âShow me.â She whispers and your stomach jolts.
Smoke leaves the lit end of the J and you flick the lighter off. You bring it to your lips and puff your cheeks full of smoke, inhaling as deep as you can before your lungs squeeze. You cough and heave tearfully and Ellie leans in to rub your back.Â
âThat was better.â She says softly. âI was gonna dare you to hit it anyway.â Your coughing fits calm and you swallow.Â
âShit,â You say. Ellie takes the joint from you and hits it like a fucking pro. She's much closer than she was seconds ago. You examine how her lips curl around the roach, cheeks expanding around carbon before inhaling, allowing the remainder to leave in a bunch of circles.Â
âYou really blowing Oâs right now?â You think you hit it right this time. The jitters youâve had all day are beginning to dwindle.Â
She smiles mischievously, âMhm.âÂ
âTruth or dare?â You mumble.
â⊠Truth.âÂ
âDid you think about me⊠after you left?â If you were to lean forward an inch, Ellieâs nose would touch yours. Nose hug. Her face spots are so adorable.Â
âYeah. A lot.â She passes the J back to you and you accept it boldly. Youâre releasing your stress with every exhale. Ellie was right; Smoking does feel good.Â
âWhatâd you think about?âÂ
âIsnât it my turn?âÂ
âNo.â You smile.Â
She shrugs, âI dunno. JustâŠâ Her gaze falls onto her stuffed tabby cat.Â
âI feel like youâre boutta say something nasty.â You snicker.Â
âWha â no! The fuckâ â
You mock her, rubbing all over yourself, âI thought about your hands, ooo, aaaâ â
Ellie smacks your arm a bunch of times before pushing you back onto the bed. Youâre howling laughter over her whining, âBitch, thatâs you! Donât think I forgot about that shit you pulled in the car!â
âYou have nice hands! What can I say,â You slur with a dumb grin, âYou have, like⊠classic lesbian hands. All you need is some Hot Topic rings and all the hoes gonâ flock to you.â You take one last toke before the lit end can reach your fingers, stubbing it on the ashtray.Â
Ellie seemingly ponders with the theory, â⊠Is that why a milf ate me out at the club?âÂ
Your neck almost snaps when it cranes to look at her, âWhat the fucâ â
âYeah. Craziest experience I ever had. Like, in my life.âÂ
âFuck, EllieâŠâ Your head flops back onto her Lightning McQueen blankets. âWas it good?âÂ
âI⊠I guess. I came.âÂ
You stare at the star stickers on her ceiling. âYou guess?â She only hums.Â
âButâŠâ
âHm?â You urge her to continue.Â
âShe didnât⊠kiss me.â She whispers like itâs dirty to say out loud. You slowly blink at the opaque walls. âI mean, she did, but it wasnât a real one.âÂ
âShame on her.âÂ
Ellie maneuvers so sheâs lying on her back beside you. âYeahâŠâÂ
âEllie?âÂ
âHm?â
âWere you a virgin before I touched you?âÂ
You expect her to slap the shit out of you again, but she doesnât. She takes one deep breath before muttering, âYes.âÂ
You stop yourself from melting into her bed, turning on your side and propping yourself up on an elbow, gazing down at her. Her eyes are wide as saucers as she looks up at you. You can see her fingers twitching around her pillow, squeezing the fabric of the case. Right on Rigbyâs nose.Â
âA-Are we still playing truth or dare?â She whispers, her breath hitting your face. She smells like oranges. You shake your head, tongue rolling over your lips. âNo.â Your free hand lands on her hip and squeezes. Her jaw slacks around a gasp.
â⊠Oh.â
âOh?â You want â need to kiss her so badly. Steal all the oxygen from her lungs so that she has no other choice but to breathe from you. Only you. Your vision is hazy with each travel over her face. She looks so soft, so pliant, so ready and prepared for you to take from her. Just like you hoped.Â
Your hand travels, pushing her sweatshirt up just above the waistline of her pants, fiddling with the knot right under her bellybutton.Â
You pull at the string until it loosens, âShe gave you head?âÂ
âT-The milf?âÂ
âYeah. The milf.â Aggravation seeps through your tone. Ellieâs hips twitch.Â
â⊠Yeah?â She coughs. You hum and hook your thumb under the band and inch them down. They arenât even off all the way and you can tell sheâs naked underneath.Â
âHow good was it?âÂ
âI donât⊠know?âÂ
âYeah you do. How good was it?â You snip, and Ellie winces. âI-I squirted.â She trips over her words and your clit jumps. You donât say anything, and she seems sad.Â
â⊠Are you mad at me?âÂ
âNo.â Your tone says otherwise. Youâre not mad. You donât know what you are. You donât like what sheâs telling you, though. Fuck milfs⊠You love them with your entire heart, but fuck them.Â
⊠Yeah. Youâre high as shit.Â
You sit up and she moves to follow you, but you push her down and she goes limp under your touch.Â
âDonât move. Just lay there.âÂ
She pouts and you almost kiss it, âDonât be mad.âÂ
âI told you Iâm not.â You swing a leg over her waist and she sighs dreamily. âHow many times did you come.â Youâre not asking; Sheâs going to tell you. You raise her sweatshirt up over her breasts.Â
âT-Two â Two.â She moves to throw her sweatshirt over her head but you snatch her wrists, pinning them right on the cushiony mattress. She doesnât fight you.Â
âI want you quiet. Your dadâll kill me if he hears you.â
Her eyes go glossy and twinkle, âOkayâ âÂ
âI mean it. Donât say shit.âÂ
âMânot gonna,â She whines before her mouth clamps shut. You give her overlapped wrists one last threatening squeeze, watching her fingers go lax before releasing her. You cup her tits and her eyes flutter shut, teeth sinking into her lower lip. You mouth at the valley between her tits and her back arches to follow each swipe of your tongue.Â
You kiss all over her ribcage, almost feeling each erratic thump of her heart under your tongue. She keens when your tongue flicks over the rising bud of her nipple, thighs squeezing around your hips. Your mouth latches onto the skin right above her areola, teeth sinking into it before sucking. Her hips raise and sheâs breathing like sheâs about to faint, and you grin like a fox.Â
You donât let up until a wet maroon mark is left on her tit before swiftly switching to the next one, leaving a much harsher spot on the raised skin. An eager hand scratches down her torso until it brushes the patch of hair that peeks out from under her pants.Â
You shove your hand beneath the light cloth and your fingers are drenched in seconds. Your walls squeeze around nothing when you feel her clit jump in excitement. Her squishy lips spread around your middle and index fingers, her throbbing bundle of nerves cinched between them. She keeps making fucking noise and the walls seem to shake.Â
âWhatâd I say.â
âI â mâsorry, canât h-help iâ â
âBe quiet, Ellie.â Your fingers slip over her messy clit in slow, teasing circles. You release her skin until itâs blistering and bruised, quickening the pace of your fingers and she pulses in your hand. Your tongue swirls around her nipple once more, cheeks hollowing when you suckle.Â
Your eyes search for hers but her head is thrown back, neck strained and veins popping from beneath her skin. Your lips release the skin and your drippy hand leaves her pants. Your nipples harden under your tee when she reaches for your retreating form, fingers digging into your sweats.Â
Her pants are yanked down and tossed across the room, her toes curling in her rainbow-striped socks when your hands hook under her knees to push them up to her chest. Her arms entangle under her bent legs to hold them out of your way.Â
âI could fuck you right now with no problems.â You exhale in a daze, âSâfucking drippinâ.â You envision how good her pussy will swallow whatever pops in, how easy itâll stretch around something thickâ
Ellieâs eyes shine like you offered her candy and her hole clamps down hard. You chuckle. âYou want that?âÂ
Her head bounces off the pillow in rushed nods. If your mouth wasnât so fucking dry, youâd be slobbering all over her pussy. âRemember what I said?â You remind her, and she plants a heavy hand over her mouth. You kiss her ankle in appreciation.Â
Your fingers move on autopilot, massaging her clit a few more times before inching down, your index pushing past the tight, gripping muscles. Your fingerâs swallowed whole in an instant and Ellieâs trying her hardest to mask her squeaks. âFuck me,â you sigh when she takes another finger with no hassle, walls engulfing your digits in wetness. Her scent is surrounding you and itâs intoxicating.Â
âMissed you sâbadâ â
âMissed you more, baby. Missed this pussy,â Youâre pussydrunk and youâre slipping. That spot in her cunt becomes plumper with each press of your fingertips, âShe fucked you better than me?âÂ
Ellieâs denial is convincing, but that sick part of your brain doesnât believe her. She loved being touched by someone, wanted by someone. Someone who wasnât you, and youâre livid, âNoooâ â
You slice through her whine, âNo?â Your smile is sadistic and your fingers are relentless, âYou said her name like you said mine?â You grit and her eyes cycle into her skull, her hair sticking to her forehead. Sheâs trying to keep her voice down when she whispers how she only thought about you when she made a mess. She wanted you there, she says, she needed you there to take care of her.Â
âYâfuck me sâgood, fuckâ â
Your eyes are dead, âIâll hurt you. Be quiet.âÂ
Fear flashes beneath her desire and she listens, keeping her sobs to a minimum. The sloppy, wet sounds of her pussy overtake the entire room the harder you fuck in, her nails tearing into her Pikachu stuffie on the corner of her bed. A string of drool dribbles from her bottom lip to her sweatshirt, her eyes glowing under the dimly lit lamp.Â
Her walls shake and throb on you, âGonna cum, baby?â You grin manically at her dumbed-out expression, cheeks wet and eyes droopy. You coo at her and force in as deep as you can, curling your fingers up, fighting against the tight contractions of her walls.Â
âMake a mess on me, baby, I gotchu, câmonâ â
A long, drawn-out moan escapes Ellieâs lips, and youâre so hypnotized by the heavy spray of juices that lands on your thigh that you donât even bother to shut her up. Sheâs drenching her sheets and blankets and you and itâs the hottest thing youâve ever seen. Youâre fucking wave after wave out of her and sheâs practically riding your hand, groaned curses and dazed squeaks of your name bouncing off the walls.Â
It feels like minutes pass when her orgasm slows, inner thighs drenched and dripping with slickness. Ellieâs entire body shakes and her thighs squeeze around your hand as she attempts to catch her breath, but youâre not done. Youâre not satisfied. She didnât give you enough.Â
You climb onto her and your lips connect in a simmering kiss, her wet mouth smacking against yours. Her cold hands land on either of your cheeks and your hips roll downward on hers. She whines into your mouth and tries to meet your hips but you force them back onto the mattress. She yanks at your shirt in attempts to rip it off but you donât let up, lips slipping down to connect with her neck.Â
Your wrist twists downward until you're met with her sticky bush once more, spreading her lips apart and shoving your fingers back inside her. She chokes a wet gasp when they hit right where she needs, her arms wrapping around the back of your neck to hold you close. Youâre babbling nonsense in her ear as you work her, telling her how sheâs stuck with you, how youâre never leaving her side again, demanding that she says you're the best sheâs ever had. And she does, and either youâre fucked out of your mind, or she means it.Â
You barely catch how your hips move like you're fucking her, driving into her as hard as you can and she takes it, stretches her legs wider so you can reach the spots sheâs never been able to on her own. Sheâs saying your name like a prayer, like itâs all sheâs ever known, and itâs breaking you down, only to build you back up so you can crash back into her. You missed her so fucking bad and youâre unleashing all of your feelings on her body and she eats all of it. How could you leave her when she fucking needs you this badly? Youâll never forgive yourself.Â
Sheâs warning you, crying about how youâre going to make her squirt again, begging you to slow down because she canât take what youâre giving her, but you feel so good and you know she does, too. You canât stop even if you want to. You want to drain her, live inside her for the rest of your days on Earth. Youâre forcing space for you inside her.
Her nails dig into your shoulders as she cums. Sheâs unapologetically loud and it flows directly in your ear, and your own noises leave your mouth and land onto the clammy skin of her throat. The jets of fluid that leave her are stronger than the last, and you laugh. Laugh in ecstasy and joy and pleasure that you canât even feel, but itâs there. Right in your chest.Â
Youâre not done. Youâll never be done with her.Â
The night evaporates with you in between her legs, slurping every bit of cum and stress that you may have caused since knowing her from the source until the sun shines through her blinds, drinking from her like youâll die without her taste on your tongue. She lets you do whatever you need to feel satiated, but itâll never be enough now.Â
Youâll never be done with her.Â
Ellieâs naked form jolts awake when ticklish breaths hit her shoulder.Â
Youâre beneath her, slumped, pantsless legs entangling hers and arms twisted every which way as you slobber and snore. A smile grows on Ellieâs face at your peaceful expression; Sheâs never slept that good in her own bed. She doesnât want to wake you, but she has to pee so fucking badly.Â
She shifts in her position and instantly cringes at the soreness in her legs. Warmth coats the crests of her cheeks when she sees the discarded sheets and pillowcases that were changed only hours ago on the floor, head plopping onto your shoulder to hide in your neck. Your snoring gets cut by a guttural cough and Ellie laughs to herself when your snores pick up again.Â
Sheâs not a morning person in the slightest, so why the fuck is she so happy? Is this the post-sex glow that her friends always tell her about? Is she still considered a virgin if you only used your fingers and tongue? She doesn't feel like one⊠Sex rules are fucking dumb. She stops stressing before she ruins her morning.Â
The pangs in her bladder are getting on her nerves; She wants to cuddle. She sighs and shifts on top of you, trying her hardest not to disrupt your deep slumber. She manages to separate and clothe herself before waddling down the hall and into the bathroom, trying to ignore the aches in her thighs. You wrecked her shit⊠What the hell.Â
The second she leaves the bathroom, she smells coffee. Her dadâs up. She might vomit.Â
The two of you werenât that loud. Definitely not. He couldnât have heard. He didnât hear! Ellieâs stealthy as she tiptoes through the hall⊠until the fucking floorboards croak from beneath her and she nearly faints.Â
âCome out, dipshit. I know itâs you.âÂ
Her eyes squeeze shut and she curses to herself. She reluctantly appears from behind the wall, her dad sitting comfortably on the couch with a filled mug and newspaper, Pickle napping on his lap. He peeks from above his reading glasses.Â
âThink we needa talk.âÂ
â⊠Fuck me.â She whispers before shamefully limping into the living room. She flops onto the couch and glues her eyes onto the decorative rugs under the coffee table.Â
âShe seems nice.â Her dad sips his mug. Ellieâs face burns.Â
âShe is.â She mumbles. You took such good care of her after last night. You got her in the shower, brushed her teeth for her when she was damn near sleepwalking, watched her down two bottles of water. Her heart flutters at how soft your eyes turned when you kissed her to sleep.Â
âIs she your girlfriend?âÂ
â⊠I dunno.â He hums and sips.Â
She doesnât know. Youâre not dating, but Ellie thinks you like her⊠She thinks. She likes you⊠a lot. She bites at her nails.Â
âYou like her?â He asks lowly; She knows he knows.Â
âYeahâŠâ Ellie whispers, cheeks rising on their own. She covers her face when he smiles.Â
âJust⊠take your time.â Joel advises gently, âDid she tell you sheâs in therapy?âÂ
Ellieâs ears perk and her brows furrow, âNo.â She sits up. Her dadâs gaze softens, âWait til she brings it up, then. Yâall should talk before things get serious. Itâs only been a couple days.âÂ
Ellie knows her dad is right, but itâs hard to control herself when sheâs around you. She naturally gravitates towards your aura; Itâs comforting and she doesnât want to lose it again.Â
A gentle clatter comes from her bedroom and she stands. Youâre awake.Â
âI love you, kiddo,â Joel says, and she smiles softly. âLove you, too.âÂ
She scurries down the hallway and enters her bedroom, seeing you sprawled out on the floor, all wrapped in sheets.Â
Your eyes are droopy when you croak, âHello.â Ellie snickers.Â
âHi. What happened.âÂ
âI was reaching for, like⊠an orb in my dream and I guess I did it in real life,â Your voice gets so raspy in the morning, and it tickles her ears. Ellie canât stop laughing. She helps you stand before kissing your cheek.Â
âGood morning,â she wraps her arms around your neck.Â
âM-Morninâ,â You squeak, eyes flitting around, âUh⊠How'd you sleep?âÂ
âGood.â Sheâs lost in your brown eyes. Theyâre warm like the sun. Why wonât you look at her?Â
She follows your line of vision down to your fiddling hands before whispering, âYou okay?â You simply nod. Ellieâs heart stutters nervously.Â
âDo you still wanna come over later?âÂ
â⊠Yeah.â Your attempts to disguise your stiffness fail. Ellie feels a lump forming in her throat when she detaches from you, and you search for the new pair of pants she gave you before you went to bed. Ellie watches silently, crestfallen. Something she did triggered your aloofness, so she turns to leave the room.
Her voice cracks, âIâm gonna⊠shower againâ â
âEllie.âÂ
She turns, âYes?âÂ
Her fists clench when you walk until youâre standing in front of her, warm hand coming up to hold her cheek before kissing her. Itâs soft and makes Ellieâs fingers thrum with excitement. It only lasts seconds before you pull away, and Ellie chases your mouth. Â
âIâd love to come over. I think we⊠should talk about some things.â You say quietly, and Ellie silently agrees. You let her go and she wants nothing but for you to pull her in once more, shrouded in your warmth.Â
Youâre making her bed when Ellie leaves for the bathroom, body falling against the door to calm herself down. Youâre not upset with her, and you want to come over⊠to talk, whatever that means.
The hot water burns her skin; She spends her entire shower thinking about how she can make you as happy as she feels.Â
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click! finale (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you need a roommate, and you love eggplant. [college au]
WORD COUNT: 4.7k
WARNINGS: photographer/roommate!ellie, ocs an artist with a rep and black, parental trauma, self-worth issues, slight disordered eating, brief alcoholism and hypersexuality, heavy grief, pining but depressed
A/N: finally on break yaassssâŠ.. sequel? LOLÂ
The air around you is strangling. You havenât left your room in two days. Youâre not passing this semester.Â
The room next to yours, however, is filled with life. Ellieâs back to blasting her music and banging on walls, but you have yet to cross paths. Not in class, not at home; You havenât seen her. Pickle never hesitates to scratch at your door for hugs. And kisses. Sheâs brought you so much comfort, even in times where you feel like youâre undeserving.Â
Christmas is around the corner, and youâre alone. Amaya never shied away from taking you home for her breaks, but sheâs gone. She hasnât called in a while; You hope sheâs doing okay.Â
So, you seek escape in a different way and do what you havenât in a long time.Â
Tears flood your vision, your thumb hovering over a number you havenât touched in ages. Your hands wonât stop trembling. Youâre going to regret this. Your heart's already breaking into pieces at the heart and cloud emojis of the contact.Â
Soft paws knead your thighs and you kiss kit-katâs tiny head as she nuzzles your chin. Youâre trying to keep your sobs to a minimum, but theyâre tearing your throat to shreds.
Your thumb comes down on the contact and the line rings. And rings⊠and rings until the dial tone sounds.Â
âAt the tone, please record your message. When you are finished recording, you may hang up or press one for more options.â
You knew no one would answer. No one ever answers, but still, you listen for her voice. The steadiness of her breathing. You take a shaky breath, âHi, mom.â Mindless sentences pour out of you like a waterfall. You just sit there and allow Pickle to playfully bite your finger.Â
âI, uh⊠Iâm notâŠâ Another sob, âIâm not doing well.âÂ
You would never say that if she were here. You always masked your true feelings for her sake; She never needed any additional stress.Â
Void images of your father reoccur in your memory, âI think thereâs something wrong with me⊠I donât think Iâm a g-good person.â A barbed tongue affectionately licks at your finger, and you try to smile.Â
âI⊠We found a kitty in the snow,â You whisper, âShe's the cutest thing ever.â Pickle looks up like she knows what youâre saying, and you weep at her delicate eyes.Â
âIt was the weirdest thingâŠâ You huff wetly, âIt felt like you put her there to stop me from making a mistake.â More tears flood your shut eyes.Â
âI just miss youâŠâ Your palm digs into your eye, âand I wish you w-were here. Iâm notâŠâ Pickle climbs to rest in your lap; You always did that with your mom for comfort. Another loud sob.Â
âI lovâ â
You jolt at the loud dial tone, and the line ends. You drop your phone on your blanket and search around your room, the portrait of your mother standing tall on your desk. You need to make another one for her birthday.Â
Your eyes travel over your space, and for the first time, you donât feel comfort. Your mind is racing with thoughts that expose your truth; Theyâre vile and dirty and they make you feel like scum. A disease walking.Â
The dark nights are restless and the days are silent, halls only filled with soft purrs and pattering paws.Â
Your home no longer holds the joy that it once did when Amaya was here. Excitement used to burst through you whenever she prepped your movie nights after work, the living room filled with laughter and corny love lines that made your stomach secretly twist with warmth.Â
Youâre not happy anymore. Anxiety brews in you whenever you walk into the kitchen, the living room, go to feed and snuggle Pickle. Itâs fucking miserable in here, and as difficult as it was for you to admit, itâs all your fault.Â
Itâs almost finals week, and youâre nowhere near prepared. You canât focus on anything except the treacherous silence of your space. Itâs almost like Ellieâs already gone.Â
You should be anticipating her departure, antsy to have your space to yourself again, but your chest aches. This past month was anything but smooth, but you wouldnât trade it for anything. For some reason. Maybe itâs because you got to live your main character moment, even if it was just for a few hours. Â
Ellie, as much as you hate to admit it, deserves better. Just like how you deserve to spend your life alone, trapped and secluded with your own thoughts. She should want better for herself; Nothing is worse than being in your presence; Maybe thatâs why you have no one.Â
You desperately want to do better for yourself, but youâre tired. Your mother would be so disappointed in you. You retire from wallowing and climb under the covers, Pickle clutched tightly to your chest. You hope she doesnât mind the tears from your tee. Â
The portfolio is finished. Ellie canât stop staring at the booklet enclosed in leather on her desk.Â
The online submission process was infuriating, mainly due to her laptop dying during the portfolio render, but itâs done. Her ticket into a life-changing position is no longer hers to judge; It can only go up from here.Â
All she needs is that phone call from the recruiting manager and itâs over. Sheâll be in the city in no time. Sheâs excited and jittery; Every buzz from her phone is met with clenched hands and a sweaty forehead. Her disappointment heals when she sees her fatherâs classic thumbs up emojis surrounded by black and red hearts; Even from miles away, he knows when she needs support.Â
Ellie lays her forehead on the leather, sighing in relief for what seems like the billionth time. Itâs a surreal feeling, relishing in accomplishments. She's never done it, mainly because her mother never wanted to acknowledge happenings she wasnât the center of. Hearing congratulations is still a mindfuck years later.Â
⊠Your photos looked stunning. Youâre made for this, even if you donât believe it.Â
Ellie will never admit how much energy she put into editing those pictures, specifically the ones youâre in. She spent hours recoloring, scaling, sharpening those photos, and they turned out incredible. Probably some
of the best shots sheâs ever taken, and youâre in the center. And your eyes⊠Thereâs so much light in those hazel specks.Â
Another mindfuck.Â
Whenever Ellie comes home, she checks the small space between the floor and door of your bedroom to see if youâre awake. If youâre alive. The relief she feels when she sees a lamp light or shadow eases the tension in her shoulders.Â
She never knocks, though. Never.Â
So why are you?Â
Ellieâs back instantly straightens at the soft pats on her door, heart pounding in her ears. You never knock.Â
Sheâs embarrassed at how fast she stands, chair nearly falling over as she flies to pull her door open.Â
Sheâs met with you; She hopes you canât hear the shatters from her chest at the sight of your disheveled appearance. Your hair is matted and the brunette river in your eyes are surrounded by redness
âSorry, Iââ Your voice cracks like you havenât spoken in ages, âShe was lying there and I felt bad. She missed you, I think.â Sheâs never heard you sound so tedious. Youâre always the loudest, goofiest person in the room. Ellieâs brows furrow before following your line of vision. Pickleâs sleep in front of her door, curled like a cinnamon roll. Ellie sighs as picks her up as fluidly
as she can, trying her best not to wake her.Â
âYouâre gonna have to take her when you leave.âÂ
Devastation sets in your tone as you stare at the little fur ball, âWhy?â She asks.Â
âMy dadâs allergic.â You whisper.
Ellie peers down when Pickle stirs, âIs⊠is he visiting?â She asks, just as quietly.Â
Your head shakes, âIâm going home.âÂ
Ellie does an impeccable job of hiding her shock. So many questions race in her mind: going home? Whereâs home for you? Is it permanent? Are you moving out? When? Are you and your dad close?Â
Youâre turning away back into your room, but Ellie blurts out before you can shut the door. âI finished my portfolio! Itâs⊠itâs done. I turned it in.âÂ
You turn, and your eyes are watery. Your smile is tiny, but genuine. âCongratulations,â youâre so quiet and your voice shakes. Ellieâs mind whirls, âTheyâre gonna love it.â You take one last look at Pickle, and your bottom lip wobbles. You shut and lock the door before Ellie can say thank you for helping me.Â
Ellieâs eyes lock onto the floor, watching your lamp turn off, ears honing in on the shuffling of blankets. She swiftly scurries inside her space when she hears crying.Â
Her chest concaves at the sobs echoing through the dark, silent halls. Through the thin wall as she sets the kitty on her favorite pillow to sleep on. She paces around her room and yanks at her pinky. How she wishes to be a fly on the wall; She wants to knock on your door so badly, but she doesnât know what to say. How to comfort. She's always relied on her father for that.Â
So, she just listens with regret and makes her final decision.
If you move from this counter, youâll faceplant into hardwood. You donât like the blaringly loud song coming from above, so you down another seltzer. Itâs distracting enough.Â
You feel yourself leaning forward, so you force yourself back up, practically flung over the counter. Youâre never drinking again, you promise yourself. How many times has that one been broken? You donât remember. You miss Ellie.Â
Youâre going to fall again, but this time, youâre supported. And not by the counter. You instantly relax at the familiar scent.Â
Abbyâs mumbling something about something, but it sounds like gibberish. You throw your arms around her neck, inhaling deeply; You miss Ellie terribly.Â
We gotta get you outta here. You frown; You donât want to leave! The party just started!Â
Her strong arms wrap around your waist to maneuver you. Youâre not sure where she's taking you, but you donât fight. You simply allow her to snatch your heels off and carry you into the piercing-sharp cold. Just allow her to drag you to safety. You wish it was Ellie.Â
The world around you moves in a blur; The pace is making you dizzy. You donât want to vomit in Abbyâs car. When did she get a car?Â
âAbbyâŠâÂ
âYeah, hun? You good?â She sounds so far away. Your mumbles are incoherent. She's so confused, so she asks you to repeat it.Â
You face her from the passenger seat with a sultry grin. You miss Ellie, âI missed you.â Your words are garbled and your hands are as loose as your tongue, shakily landing on her muscular thigh, massaging the skin.Â
Abby tenses with a sigh, planting a gentle hand on your traveling one. Her grip tightens when you try to move. âDid you really?âÂ
That's your green light. Your smile grows as you clumsily unbuckle your seatbelt, âStop⊠stop the car.âÂ
Abbyâs foot plants on the break, and you jerk forward. Like the night you found Pickle. Like when EllieâŠÂ
âWhatâs the matter?âÂ
I miss my roommate. âIâm horny.âÂ
Your friend scoffs and shakes her head. Either youâre too drunk or sheâs disappointed⊠Not the reaction you were seeking. Your smile tries to fade, but you force the corners of your mouth back up.Â
âNo, youâre not.â She snaps, and it takes you a second to catch it. Abbyâs upset again. What the fuck did you do this time? Your facade finally falters. Now youâre irritated.Â
âHowâre y⊠howâre you gonna tell me what the fuck I am?â You sound like a fucking idiot, but your rage ignites your slurs, âIf you donât want me, whyâre you here!âÂ
âBecause you fucking called and Iâm your friend! I didnât wanna leave you by yoursâ â
âYou shouldâve!â Your shriek is piercing; Youâre shocked the windows didnât shatter and slice you both.Â
âThatâs how you fucking feel? Really?âÂ
You try to swallow tears, but they flow. The words you want to say are on the tip of your tongue; Thank you for coming to get me. Iâm sorry for being awful. Donât leave me by myself.Â
But none of them escaped. They sit and rot in your throat. Youâve never seen Abby soâŠÂ
And she doesnât let up, âNow you wanna cry? Are you serious?â Thereâs fire in her eyes; It burns in a way youâre not used to, especially not her, âThis victim shit is getting very oldâ â
âI donât care!âÂ
âI donât fucking care, either! If you wanna keep getting used like a piece of meat by random bitches, then do that! Leave me the fuck out of it!â Abby slams her hand down on the armrest, and the car doors unlock, âMatter of fact, get the fuck out!âÂ
âFuck you!âÂ
âFuck YOU! Get out! Get the fuck out!âÂ
Curses and heated exclamations leave the two of you until you wobbly exit the vehicle, slamming the door as hard as your brain would allow. The wind blows like tacks, stabbing through the skin of your bare arms and chest. Abby zooms off, and you scream.Â
You dig in your pocket for your phone, ineptly dialing Ellieâs number. Itâs fucking one in the morning
â⊠Hello?â She was asleep. Your heart eases at the steadiness of her tone.Â
Youâre shivering, â⊠EâEllie?âÂ
âHm?âÂ
âIâm⊠Iâm really cold and I donât,â sob, âI dunno where I amâ â
âWhat do you mean?â She asks abruptly, alert. Your heart flutters.Â
You whimper, âIâm lost, I donât⊠Iâm a bad personâ â
âSend me your location. Whereâre your keys?âÂ
âIâ I donât rememberâ â
âAre you drunk right now?âÂ
âYes,â You mumble meekly. This is so fucking embarrassing.Â
Ellie sighs heavily, âJust⊠Is there somewhere you can wait until I get there?âÂ
You search through tears, finding mostly dark retail stores and restaurants across the street⊠Except Jack in the Box! The munchies hotspot never fails you.Â
âThereâs a Jack in the Crack over there.â You point like she can see you. She snickers softly.Â
âGo, then. Iâll be there soon, okay?âÂ
âWait! Donât⊠donât hang up, please, Iâm scaredâ â
âI wasnât going to.âÂ
You closely listen to the shuffling on the other line as you wobbly trek across the street. You sharply inhale at every slip and stumble on your journey, almost sobbing through every confirmation to Ellieâs small are you okay?Â
You finally make it inside and thank God that itâs warm. You take a seat and sigh at the familiar jingle of keys.Â
âYou in there?âÂ
âMhm.âÂ
âIâm coming, send me where you are.âÂ
âK.âÂ
It takes you longer than it shouldâve to get her the location thanks to the Casa in your system, but sheâs on the way⊠You really want curly fries. Fuck.Â
You hate how your thoughts wander, self-loathing at the forefront of your lobe. You take after your father more than you thought: a filthy, lying train wreck. Youâve ruined every glimmer of hope, of positive influence around you, and youâre forced to bathe in the treachery youâve created all over again.Â
âHey.âÂ
You leap out of your seat at Ellieâs raspy tone, seeing your hoodie draped over her forearm and keys dangling in her hand. Your tummy growls when you wave. Ellieâs gaze softens. âHungry?â She hands you the hoodie for you to throw on. You nod.Â
âWhat do you wanna eat?âÂ
â⊠Fries,â you croak, âCurly, please.âÂ
Ellie nods and waddles to the service counter. You watch her backside under her puffer as she pays and collects a small baggie and water before nodding towards the car. You follow close behind her in silence, munching on your snack.Â
The ride back home is silent, but for once, the air isnât deadly. Youâre eased back from your breakdown, and itâs definitely not due to the forest in your roommateâs vision.Â
You enter your warm apartment and get greeted with soft purrs, Kit-Kat skipping over to rub against your leg. Itâs almost enough to make you break down all over again; You canât believe you have to say goodbye to her next week.Â
You kick your sneakers off and squat down to her level, âI love you so much, baby girl. Thank you for taking care of me.â You whisper and pet her head, all the way down to her tail. She meows like she loves you. Ellie shuts the door and watches you silently. You turn to face her. For the first time, she doesn't fidget at your inspection.
Her eyes are much glossier and sheâs picking at the skin on her pinky. She wants to say something.Â
âYou okay?â You murmur, and Ellie nods. You donât believe her. Her eyes are downcast. Why does she look so nervous?Â
The silence is killing you, so you speak.Â
âEllie, Iâm⊠Iâm sorry for everything,â You stand and ramble. âIâm the worst roommate imaginable and I-Iâm terrible and impulsive and I fucking suck, but Iâm sorry⊠Iâm sorry.âÂ
I also kinda like you.Â
Not even your word vomit lets that slip. So, you apologize, sloppily and snot-filled. Tears drip down your face in waterfalls, âIâmâ I don't wanna go... and I donât want you to goâŠâ
Ellieâs timid facade breaks, only slightly, eyes closing gently as she listens. âI know I donât deserve t-to ask that and itâs not⊠I wasnât apart of your planâ â
âYouâre drunk.âÂ
Youâre plummeting into the void all over again, succumbing to a familiar, oddly comforting darkness.Â
âH-Huh?âÂ
Ellieâs as firm as a tree, unmoving. Strong. Still. Youâre transported back to your first conversation and how intimidated she made you feel. âYouâre drunk⊠and I leave in the morning. I got the job.âÂ
Drowning. Thatâs what this feels like. Strangely proud. Oddly suffocating. Youâre underwater, but refuse to resurface. âI-In the morning?âÂ
Her head jerks. âI, uh. I got rent covered. Sorry for the late notice.â She shoves her hands in her pocket. You shake your head, wiping your face with the back of your hand. âItâs okay.â You whisper. âWhereâre you gonna go?âÂ
âMy dadâs. Heâs a few hours out. The truck comes tomorrow.âÂ
Your head bobs in acknowledgement, âH-How was the stats final?â She pauses; Her eyes sadden, tilting like an unwatered rose. âYouâll do fine.â She whispers.Â
âPromise to take care of my daughter?â You blurt between sniffles, already moving down the hall, ignoring the loud shattering in your heart when you peep all her boxes in the now vacant room beside yours.Â
Ellie mumbles your name but youâre sick of ugly crying in front of people. âGood luck with everything.â You mutter with hot feet.
And with the last click of your bedroom lock, you shut out the vine who entangled your heart for the last time. You give into the feelings of loss, the emotions that come with failure, and release them into your hands.Â
What couldâve been, your brain hollers while your heart wails. What couldâve been if you werenât you.Â
You donât remember waking up, but youâre in pain. Physically, mentally; You're hurting. The intensity of it somehow gets worse at the sound of Ellie dragging boxes out of her â the room.Â
You just cry. Thereâs nothing to do but cry. Your phone has been ringing all morning, but you donât have strength to reach for it. You relish in the deserving pain of your hangover. Tequila hasnât done shit for you.Â
Hours pass, and your home is silent. Ellieâs gone. Pickleâs gone. Amayaâs gone. Abbyâs gone. Your motherâs gone. You take their departures as signs. Itâs probably time for you to go, too.Â
Your shower is incredibly long. You wash and wash and re-wash, wanting the feelings of cleanliness to cascade down your skin, but it never comes. You tearfully accept your lecherous nature and every vile entity attached to it. Youâre a vessel for heartbreak and villainy. Forever your worst enemy. You look in the mirror for the first time in days. Just for a second. You canât stand to see yourself for longer than that, your naked form a reminder of every violation youâve had to endure since you were fifteen.Â
Ellie isn't thinking twice about you, and yet, she terrorizes your mind, trying to convince yourself that your time together wasnât all bad. Youâll never forget the color she brought to you. Her seed is forever planted and growing in your heart, her roots forcing their way into your system, intertwining with your rough, cracked bones, enclosing around your lungs with each breath.Â
Too bad you impacted her in the worst way. You couldnât even manage to give her a sober apology before she left. Itâs hard to accept the fact that youâll never see her again, but thereâs nothing you can do about it now.Â
Once again, youâre too late.Â
The short lap around your living room crushes your spirit. Somehow, all of your memories are shrouded in emptiness. All the proof of Ellieâs residency is gone⊠Except the indent of her body on the couch. She always loved sleeping there.
One last heavy exhale. Thatâs all you can manage before you grab your coat and beanie and exit, locking the door behind you. You keep your head down on the way to the parking garage, hopping into the driverâs seat. The ride to the academic advisory office is silent and swift; It matches the finality of your meeting.Â
Tears glaze your eyes when you ask your counselor, âWhatâs⊠Whatâs the first step of withdrawing? Like, from school.âÂ
-
-
-
CHRISTMAS EVEÂ
Your fork picks at the pasta noodles on your barely touched plate. The wine is delicious.Â
âHoney, are youâŠâ Your dad says softly before sighing, âHowâs the meal?â You blink up at him, focusing on the crinkles in his eyes. He seems youthful somehow. Healing looks good on him.Â
You gulp down more maroon, â⊠Itâs great. Thank you.â You mutter. Youâre not used to talking to him; Youâre glad the feelings are mutual. He only nods, head downcast onto his plate. At least heâs eaten.Â
He sets his fork down on his plate and wipes his mouth with a napkin, âI hope you like your gift.â He says before standing to place the dish in the sink.
A dark smile spreads behind your glass.Â
âNever thought youâd buy me anything.â You snicker sarcastically. âDonât start.â His voice slices through the kitchen. You hold back your flinch. Youâre not ten anymore.Â
You shrug, shoulders heavy, âJust saying.â A glass shatters in the sink, and he curses and storms off, the bedroom door nearly swinging off the hinges with a slam. Your smile grows at the booming echo. Like father, like daughter you suppose.Â
-
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DECEMBER TWENTY-SEVENTHÂ
âAre you ready, kiddo?âÂ
Ellieâs heart is pounding through her chest as she stares out the window. She canât believe her father hasnât commented on the bursting organ. âNo.â She whispers, adjusting the camera strapped around her neck. She's fighting not to bite her nails; Her dad hates that.Â
He chuckles softly, âYes, you are.âÂ
No, sheâs not.Â
The photography studio is fucking huge and surrounded by tall windows that display suited individuals laughing, conversing, perfecting their lenses. She can see the bright specks of neon color on the white floors, white walls, white couches. Itâs so much brighter than she ever imagined.
The colors are reminiscent of you. Vivid. Captivating. Beaming like your smile. There are flashes coming from all directions inside the studio and itâs making her shake in the passenger seat. A strong hand plants on her blazer, giving an encouraging squeeze. âLook at me.âÂ
Ellieâs head turns, eyes locking with her dadâs.Â
âI love you. You got this.â He says with confidence. Ellie nods in agreement, but he doesnât accept it. âSay it.âÂ
âI got this.â Not as confident. A lot quieter, but getting there.Â
âEh?â Her dad leans in closer, ear pointed at her. She giggles and repeats herself. A little louder. He decides that itâs good enough, pulling her close over the center console. Ellie inhales as deeply as she can, right in the crook of his neck. He plants one last kiss on her cheek before releasing her. She grabs her bag from the floor and pushes the door open, looking over her shoulder one last time. âI love you.â She whispers. He bops her nose with the most delicate grin. Pride is radiating off him, and it warms her from the cold outside.Â
Ellie departs with one last wave, shutting the door and skipping onto the sidewalk, walking right up to the front door of the studio. A final peek at her dad; He sends her two thumbs up. She smiles.Â
Breathe in, one⊠two⊠threeâŠÂ
When the door pushes open, she's greeted with wide grins and warm hugs. It feels like home already.
Finally... Finally.
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click!: in frame. 1 (e.w.)
SYNOPSIS: you crave redemption more than love. [idk au]
WORD COUNT: 7.7k
WARNINGS: professionalphotographer!ellie, strugglingartist!oc whoâs black, ANGST!!, loss and unhealthy grieving, papa issues, verbally abusive parent(PLEASE TREAD LIGHTLY), depictions of therapy and counseling, light discussion of anger management, brief mention of alcohol, bullying, a lil fluff, SMUT!! YIPPEE MDNI, bondage, squirting, bathroom sex, eating out no taqueria, ellie getting sloppy from a hot milf thatâs itÂ
You look like your mom.Â
Your fatherâs admiring whisper yanks you out of the hazy turbulence in your mind. You shovel a handful of caramel popcorn in your mouth. You donât dare look at him.Â
Daughter things, I guess. Your dad simply hums. Silence simmers between the two of you. Itâs not comforting. Not like it should be. A bomb is coming.Â
Honey, I⊠I love you. Your father sounds like he's crying and it pauses your aggressive chewing. You finally turn to face him and your fingers twitch when you see his globby tears. Theyâre heavy as he releases his regrets in silence, just like he always does during this time of year.Â
Me, too, dad.Â
Youâre not sure if youâre lying or not. Some things are impossible to forget, you suppose.Â
You eat more popcorn with a permanently damaged heart.Â
FOUR YEARS LATER
FIRST DAY WITH DOCTOR BROWN.Â
âSome people believe that any form of assistance is⊠insulting. Whether it be to them as people or⊠specific traits that they hold that others may find unfamiliar or unsettling. Iâm not here to judge or anything of that nature. Just here to help you figure out why specific aspects of your life affect you the way they do.âÂ
Your arms cross over your chest. Dr. Brown realizes youâre not taking the bait, so she attempts to get you more comfortable. âI think icebreakers could help ease some of the tension. So⊠Whatâs your favoritâ â
âMy dad died last year.âÂ
Your statement makes her freeze, her smile melting off her face, eyes shifting across her face. She adjusts some papers on her clipboard and clicks her pen. âAlright, hun,â Her gentle tone makes your stomach twist. âLetâs talk about it. What was the relationship with your dad like?â You simply shrug.Â
Dr. Brown nods and tries again. âWere you and him close? Your notes say you and your mother were inseparable, just like me and mine.âÂ
Your nails sink into your cuticles and tears burn in your eyes, âI⊠I wanted to be. Close.â You whisper. âHe wasnât around like that, though.âÂ
She scribbles and solemnly nods, âDid he work often?â Your head bobs and droplets stream down your cheeks.Â
âI didnât think Iâd care that he died⊠He was never around growing up, so⊠like, whatever.â You grumble lamely.
âWhat did losing him feel like?âÂ
The end of your mouth curls downward, the familiar searing youâve grown to loathe, âLike⊠the world was burninâ.âÂ
âElaborate.â She pries softly.Â
Another bounce from your shoulders. You readjust in your seat. âI wasnât even sad. JustâŠâ You trail off, fingers twitching under your arm.Â
âAngry. I was angry all the time.â You rush out quietly, face burning with shame. âJust like he was.â You pause when your breath shakes, âI wish I got some of my momâs traits. My dadân I are just alike.â You fiddle with the sleeves of your sweater.Â
â⊠Youâre not like himâ â
âI amâ â
âYouâre not. Youâre trying to put in effort to be better for the future. Could he have said the same?â Sheâs stern when she speaks.
Youâre stumped. You wipe your tears harshly. For the first time, you're at a loss for words.Â
WEEK TWO WITH DOCTOR BROWN.Â
âThink about the first time you saw your dad lash out. You can elaborate on how you felt, how you reacted, how your environment changed⊠Anything you feel comfortable sharing.â Your eyes stay glued to your therapistâs couch as you recall the day. Every detail and foul verbiage he directed towards your mother resurfaces and falls at your sock-covered feet.Â
It was the morning of your first day of second grade. Your mother spent the entire morning hot-combing your hair, bumping your ends, littering your locks that were bound to recoil in seconds in bobbles and clips. She could tell by your expression that you didnât like it, but she completed your bright pink outfit with itâs not for you, itâs for me! Sit still! She never failed to live vicariously through you; Every childhood moment she couldnât live out was now yours.Â
Your father wasnât around much. He was a truck-driver, on a constant voyage to wherever he was instructed to go, hundreds to thousands of miles away from solace for months â sometimes years at a time. He missed birthdays, holidays, family reunions; There was always a missing space for him somewhere in your childhood home, whether it be his customized keychain that he forgot, shoes he didnât pack, a hug he didnât give. Proof of him was always scattered around somewhere, but he was a shadow. A blank memory.Â
So, why were your cartoons interrupted by his booming voice in the kitchen?Â
You remember turning the television down, only by a couple digits, your ears honing in on every word he screamed at your mother. You were so confused. Half of those words youâd never heard before. Why was he so mad this early in the morning?Â
You knew it was serious when your mother retaliated just as loudly, the cracks and shrieks from her belts sounding alarms in your brain. Your momâs in trouble! Help her! But how could you? You were defenseless against him. It felt like the day flew by as their aggression intensified, curses nearly shattering the glass of your backyard door before everything went quiet.Â
But still, your feet carried you to peek behind the wall that separated the living room from the kitchen. Your attempts at being discreet were pointless, though. When you saw your mother pinned up against the counter by your father, tears streaming down her face as he spat with every whisper onto her cheek, you gasped. Your memory is washy after that, but you remember your mother wiping her tears and slapping that comforting grin on her face. You wish you didnât remember how broken she sounded when she said alright, baby! Ready for school? Donât wanna be late!Â
You suffered through social studies, language arts, and math. Your mind wasnât where it shouldâve been; You couldnât shake the fact that your mother could be hurt and she had no one to tell. You just prayed to yourself as your teacher spoke, hoping that your mom would be on time to pick you up at the end of the day.Â
Your eyes travel over the teal incisions of thread on your therapistâs seat. Youâre still not used to the sound of your own voice. âItâs⊠itâs a funny storyâŠâ You sound so weak. You retell what you can, all while following the tip of your therapistâs scribbling pen.Â
Why did it have to be green? Why are the clicks deafening?Â
âEllie, holy fucking â shit, these look fucking incredible!â Yuki whispers, expression impressed as she snoops over the auburn-haired girlâs shoulder, inspecting the aerial shots sheâd taken a few hours ago. Editing is a bitch. âI donât know how you do it. YouâreâŠâÂ
âA genius, I know,â Ellie says dryly, a soft grin hidden behind the hand that holds her head up. Itâs almost eleven. âMâalmost doneâ â
âNope! Not happening!â Another voice exclaims from the black lounge chair on the opposite side of the room. âYouâre not the one that has to lock up every goddamn night! I ainât stayinâ here âtil two again! You got two seconds to finish up before I drag you up outta here.âÂ
Yuki giggles at Saliyahâs scolding, and Ellie sighs. The pictures look almost perfect. Almost. Theyâre not there yet! All she needs is an hour⊠or threeâ
âWhat did I say! ââ
âAlright, alright, fuck.â Ellie shakes her head before closing all her tabs, pulling her flash drive out of the PC before shutting it down. She stands from her rolling chair and snags her blazer from over the back of it, throwing it over her shoulders and grabbing her work bag, camera already securely inside. She shoves the drive in a random pocket before stretching.Â
The two girls already have all of their belongings in hand, more than ready to clock the fuck out. Yuki eyes her slyly, sarcasm dripping from her tone, âOh, wooow, sheâs actually taking orders, now? Listening to instructions for the first time? ââ
âCan you stop.â Ellie mutters as she follows the girls descending the stairs. âNo!â They both say in unison. Ellie smiles. Does she really stay out that often? Thereâs no way sheâs that stubborn.Â
All three girls crack jokes as they vacant the building, ensuring all the lights and equipment are shut off and prepped for tomorrow. Itâs an early day.Â
âAlright, bitches!â Yuki screams into the darkness, bag swinging as her heels click-clack on the pavement. âI want you bright and bushy-tailed tomorrow! Busy day! No time to fuck arouâ âÂ
Saliyah yawns, eyes droopy, âGirl⊠fuck you.â Ellie cackles and rubs her tired eyes. She canât wait to get these six hours in. And see her baby. Saliyah wraps her arms around Ellieâs neck, muttering see you tomorrow, stinker into her neck. Ellie hums and holds her before watching her get into her vehicle.Â
Ellie does the same after both girls leave the parking lot, her head falling back onto the headrest, eyes shutting in exhaustion. Today was insane⊠Fuck, it was incredible. She's always accepted opportunities to take photos in nature. Landscapes are her prestige, but when she got the offer to take aerial shots of the ocean, she couldnât say no. Just when she thought sheâd never get on an aircraft out of fearâŠÂ Â
The shots were mystical, the monsoon winds carrying the waves in all directions as the foams ripple, a scene straight out of her dreams. The second she got off the helicopter, she got to editing. Staying in late to perfect her captures has become a terrible habit, but what can she say? She loves her job. Thank God her coworkers are as sweet as cherry pie and support her bad habit. Besides tonight, apparently.Â
Days like this keep Ellie humbled⊠Most times. She deserves to boast every once in a while. She often thinks back on her college days, how out of touch chances like these seemed. The number of times she was brushed off by respected professionals because she lacked ânecessary resourcesâ was astronomical. But look at her now. She had everything she could ever want: a career sheâs passionate about, healthy friendships, and the means to take care of her father.Â
Well⊠she has most things.Â
She sighs and starts her vehicle, the diamonds in her Rolex sparkling under the street lights beaming in from the window. The streets are calm. Not normally bustling like they would on a regular day. The clouds are coming in; Rain is due. Sheâs so excited.Â
Itâs a calm drive back to her small home. She pulls into the driveway and exits with all her supplies, unlocking and entering her place of peace.Â
Meow! Meow!Â
Ellie clicks her tongue at Pickle, âHiii, mama. Iâm home.â She drops her bag on the small couch near the front door, bending down to pick her up. âYouâre heavy, fuck.â The baby purrs and nuzzles into her neck as they enter the kitchen. She sets her down on the counter and opens the fridge for water. Thereâs soft scuffling from behind her as she sips.Â
Ellie turns to see Pickle playing with a pen, rolling it across granite. She swallows her last gulp before sighing, picking up the utensil, the one memory she kept of you. Your colorful fucking custom ballpoint pen. Pickle nibbles her fingers, trying to snatch it back to play with, but Ellie clicks it over and over.Â
âMiss her? Yeah?â She whispers. Pickle licks her index. Ellie will never admit it, but she thinks about you whenever she sees her baby. Yours, too.
She hopes youâre alright.
âYou said that going to his funeral was different from your momâs. Do you mind elaborating?âÂ
You shrug and scoff. âShouldnât everybody feel sad when they parents die?â Dr. Brown mimics you, âNot at all. Every reaction to loss is different and not all reactions are symmetrical.âÂ
âI was angry.â Your statement is blunt and abrasive.Â
âExpound.âÂ
âI wanted to dig him up and spit on him my damn self.â You say, sharp as razor blades. Brown hums, unfazed by your sudden aggression; What the hell do therapists write on those clipboards? âI just⊠Seeinâ all these fuckers I didnât know talk about how fuckinâ⊠great he was and how missed heâll be was fuckinâ infuriating. They donât know shit about that man or the shit heâs done.âÂ
Sympathy washes over Dr. Brownâs pupils. âSee, your temper is the reason youâre here. Youâre not obligated to forgive anybody that wronged you, butâŠâ Sheâs simultaneously stern and empathic, âYou do not get to use those emotions to inflict negativity onto the people around you. Youâre perpetuating the same harm you wanted to avoid in the first place.â Â
You instantly know what sheâs referring to and guilt radiates all the way down to your toes. Amaya⊠Oh, you miss her. Another good person caught in your violent crossfire. Your last conversation was vile, and you hate yourself every day for the things you said to the only person who unconditionally cared about your wellbeing. Tears brew in your ducts, but you blink them away.Â
âI didnât⊠know what to doâŠâ You didnât, so you screamed and shouted and told her to never call your fucking phone again. The last thing you berated was the final nail in the coffin for your relationship. You left me, youâd said over and over until the line went dead. You left me alone! I fucking needed you!Â
âNo one has the answers for these types of situations. Why we react the way that we do to traumatic events will always be a mystery.â She adjusts in her chair, leg crossing over the other. âWhat I do know is that⊠youâre fighting grief. Youâre choosing not to experience it, and itâs making you lash out on people who donât deserve it.âÂ
But how does one grieve the person that made their life⊠unlivable? Through rage. Rage in its purest form: unfiltered, erratic, sizzling. Itâs unrelenting and unforgiving and holds no bounds, prepared to be released at any moment, no matter whoâs present. Your fatherâs home has seen it all at this point: glass shattering on walls, screaming into the closet where all his clothes hang, punching the pillow he slept on every night.Â
Everything was exactly where your father left it, and instead of crying, you relinquished hell on the home he left in your name. Youâre still surprised it wasnât engulfed in flames after his funeral.Â
âI justâŠâ Harsh sniffles from you, desperately wiping your tears with damp hoodie sleeves, âI donât know what to do. Nothing feels⊠real anymore.âÂ
âYouâre real, baby.â This is the most delicate Dr. Brown has ever sounded, tone hushed. âYour feelings are real, your pain is real, but so is everyone elseâs. You have to remember that.âÂ
Youâre listening so intently, âWhat I'd suggestâŠâ You already know what sheâs going to say, and youâre petrified. You sag into your seat.Â
You owe those two girls an apology.
Flashes of green race across your memory. The meadows are back, and theyâre haunting.Â
âThree.â You whisper.Â
âHm?âÂ
âI oweâŠâ A heavy exhale. âThree girls an apology.âÂ
OCTOBER, 2013Â
Ellieâs officially fifteen. Sheâd give anything to be home right now.Â
She was so happy before she left that morning. Her dad woke her up with a heaping stack of iced chocolate chip pancakes that were the size of her head and happy birthday candles. Laughter echoed through their household, following as they cascaded down the stairs to blast music. Neighbors be damned. Everything was perfect. Up until she was dressed and ready and in the car.Â
Ellieâs dad held her hand the entire drive. He didnât comment on her white knuckles as she gripped his digits when he kissed the back of her hand. It took her a second to exit the car when they arrived, so he said the usual. You got this, kiddo. The extra encouragement provided a boost, for sure. She was able to get to class on time.Â
Every time a wad of paper or a sharpened pencil hits the back of her head, she regrets not begging her dad to let her stay home. Sheâs grown used to the snickers, the shoulder chucks in the hallway, but it doesnât hurt any less.
English concludes and sheâs silently packing when her bag gets yanked out of her hand.Â
Missed you, stalker, A kid who Ellie doesnât fucking remember snarks with a dark grin. Whereâs that book you always haveâ
Tyler! The teacherâs voice booms, the class filling with ooohâs, That's enough. Give her stuff back now.Â
Câmooon, I canât talk to my girlfriend? The remaining students burst into laughter and Ellieâs face burns, swallowing the lump thatâs forming in her throat.Â
How about I call home? Tyler sucks his teeth at the threat while his friends laugh, dropping Ellieâs things on her desk with little care. She wastes no time to flee, shoving her earpods in and synching each trembling breath with the heavy percussion.Â
Her dad comes to pick her up an hour later.Â
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A light tap on your shoulder tears your attention away from the lengthy equations on the board. Numbers and letters? Your fucking ass; Absolutely not!
You turn to Amaya, whoâs smiling wide, shoving a folded note in your hand, rushing you to open it. Your brows crease as you face forward, unraveling the nest crevices and met with⊠hearts? Glitter? Pretty penmanship? No man wrote this, thank God.Â
Hi. Youâre really pretty and nice. Would you like to sit with me during lunch?Â
CeniyahÂ
⊠Ceniyah? ⊠Thee Cece? The person youâve been obsessed with since middle school? What the fuck is going on!Â
You turn back to Amaya whoâs giggling into her palm, catching glimpses of a shy Ceniyah, who keeps her head down, her beaded braids shielding her face. Your face burns and you jerk back forward. Itâs not a fucking prank, what the fuck, what the fuckâ
Class drags like a bitch, but the bell finally rings, and everyone hustles, shoving books in their bags, running to the cafeteria. You refuse to move, though. Your iron is low and the person youâre in love with asked you to crunch on celery sticks with her. Alone. You're bound to pass out the second you breathe wrong.Â
Hi.
You nearly fly out of your seat at her soft tone. She sounds like an angel. Youâre going to die. You jump out of your chair and⊠take in the beauty that she is. She smells like heaven and her skin is perfect, not a blemish in sight. You hope she canât see your acne scars⊠and sheâs shorter than you. Are minors allowed to get married?Â
H-Hey, You hold up the pink piece of construction paper, I, uh, got your note⊠Itâs beautiful. Her smile shines brighter than the sun. She shakes her head and the chains locked on her clips tinker like fairies.Â
Are you kiddinâ me! That mural you helped create was crazy. That was beautiful.Â
I love you.Â
Your eyes go wide. Did you say that? You donât think you said that⊠Her smile turns confused and you realize you said that. You almost stab yourself with your pencil. I mean, like, I love how you appreciate art! Like, not m-many people⊠do that, and stuffâŠ
She smirks and your heart squeezes with delight, And stuff? She inquires with an arched brow.Â
Iâd appreciate it if you ladies headed to lunch so I can enjoy mine. Your teacher interrupts, And the next note that gets passed earns a detention.Â
A soft, floral-scented hand closes around your wrist, over your beaded bracelets and charms. You grab your bag with your last remaining strength and follow her like a puppy, her flowy skirt brushing against the bottoms of your jean-clad legs.Â
Best⊠day⊠ever.Â
PRESENTÂ
Ellie needs to start doing finger stretches. Her hands are starting to hurt every time she clocks out.Â
Sheâs sitting at her desk, re-editing the infant photos she took earlier today. The twin girls from earlier were absolute angels, smiling and cooing up at the camera behind their matching pink pacifiers. She's never thought about having children⊠ever, but it might not be so badâ
Meow! Meow, meow! MeowMEOWâ
⊠Nevermind. Kids are not for her. She can barely get this one to act right. The pictures are cute, though.Â
âWhatâs the matter, mama?â She coos down at a doe-eyed kit-kat. âHungies?â Pickle jumps up and into her lap, staring at the bright screen that displays Ellieâs editing software. Ellie smirks down at her, âWhat, you wanna try?âÂ
Pickle blinks up at her. No thoughts, just kibble.Â
She decides to save her progress on the photos and give her munchkin some love. The few minutes of head pats and runs are cut short when she gets a pop-up from her email. She pays it no mind at first, but she zeroes in on the subject with furrowed brows. It simply reads hi⊠an overdue apology. Ellie blinks a couple times before suspecting spam⊠But who the fuck names a spam email something that cryptic? What the fuck?Â
Ellie opens it⊠and her body goes numb as her eyes follow each word.Â
hi, ellie. iâm not sure how to start this off, but i hope itâs decent enough to sit through. i apologize in advance.Â
you probably donât remember me, but we had statistics and used to live together in college. it was only for two months (i think, kind of a blur) but⊠yeah. i hope it semi-kinda rings a bell. hi again.
this is a very random time to reach out, and i understand any confusion, but i just wanted to apologize for everything. i was terrible to you. i'd never thought i'd become a judgmental person, but i did. i mocked you, i spoke behind your back, and probably ruined your last year of school, and i carry that regret with me everywhere i go. iâm not sure if i'll ever be able to express my remorse properly.Â
iâm trying to do better. i want to do better, but i canât unless i express it.Â
you never have to talk to me again, and i understand if you donât, but if you ever want to have a conversation with me, iâd be more than willing to come wherever you are to do so. or we can exchange numbers if itâs less of a hassle. i see how busy you are.Â
thank you if you took out any time to read this jumbled mess of thoughts. iâm very nervous. i hope you continue to live beautifully.Â
sincerely, someone trying to start fresh.Â
(p.s. i swear i'm not a stalker. youâre really popping on instagram. congratulations on everything.)Â
Ellie wastes no time and unplugs her entire PC, the screen going black. Her heart is racing and water surfaces above her pupils. Pickle purrs in her arms as she backs her rolling chair from under the desk and scurries into her bedroom. She sets the kitty down on her bed and clutches her chest. She forgets to count, forgets to breathe as detailed images of you scatter in her head.Â
You⊠what the fuck.
Ellie feels her hands start to shake, so she squeezes them in a fist as she paces. Her gasps are choked and sheâs spiraling into panic; She canât unsee your teary, brown eyes, how you tried to mask your sadness when she stated she was leaving. She was able to convince herself that sheâd never see you again, and it took her so long to be okay with that. Sheâs grown to be okay without your presence.
The burnt trail she left behind has reignited again. She's sinking, drowning, just like she did years ago.Â
WEEK FIVE WITH DR. BROWN
âHow do you feel now? Be honest.âÂ
â⊠Still shitty⊠but alright, I guess.â Youâre hoarse when you speak.Â
âElaborate. What does alright mean for you?âÂ
You pick at your fingers, âIâm not⊠I donât wanna, like, kill myself⊠if thatâs what youâre asking. The ballâs in their court now, I guess. Iâm⊠Iâm just alright.â Your shoulders bounce in a shrug.Â
âHas anyone answered?â Your head shakes in denial. âDonât let that jeopardize your progress. However they react to you contacting them is not on you anymore. They either accept it or they donât, and theyâre valid in both options.âÂ
Dr. Brown pauses and eyes you skeptically, âWhat?â You ask.Â
She shrugs, âOne person isnât on your making amends list.âÂ
Your reply is immediate, âProbably for a reason.âÂ
âDo you remember what you told me during our first meeting?âÂ
Irritation boils under your skin. âI see where youâre taking this conversation and Iâm not messinâ witâ it⊠Respectfully. Next topic, please.âÂ
Her hands raise in surrender, âAyâ, Iâm not here to make you do diddly-squat. Merely providing perspective.âÂ
âRight.âÂ
âYou did beat that girl to a pulp, though. I will sayâ â
âItâs what she deserved.â You say flatly. âShe⊠humiliated me, and when her bitch left, she tried to come back to me. Get me pregnantâ â
âChile, Iâm not tryna hear all thatâ â
You scoff and fall back in your seat, cushions and pillows molding with the curve of your spine. Dina bringing her happy ass to your fatherâs home after his death was one of the most infuriating experiences of your entire goddamn life. The second you opened the door, you were met with wildfire and permanently scarred. The least you could do is give her a fucking black eye.Â
What you did after that⊠youâll never regret. Ever. She can blast you on Twitter all she wants; Sheâs dead to you.Â
Dr. Brown sips on her black tea with a pointed stare, âYes, maâam?â You say sarcastically.Â
âWatch that tone,â That look in her eye⊠she meant that. Youâll be quiet. âShe was wrong for what she did, but you ainât innocent.âÂ
âIâm sorry, but I disagree. That one⊠she can choke. I donât care.â Dr. Brown is disappointed by your answer, but frankly, you donât care. That ship sailed and sank like the goddamn Titanic.Â
She seems disappointed in your answer, but she lets it go. â⊠Alright, then.âÂ
On the brink of a heart attack perfectly explains how Ellieâs been feeling for the past week. The number of times sheâs reread your fucking email is genuinely embarrassing, but sheâs weighing her options: she either blocks you or accepts your offer. She's never been so conflicted in her life. She desperately needs a fucking break.Â
She never takes Saliyah and Yuki up on their offers to turn up on Friday nights, but her rampant emotions backed her into a corner⊠and now sheâs tipsy on the dancefloor of some rinky-dink club. One night of release wouldnât hurt.Â
Ellie really wishes she had a grilled cheese. Theyâre quite delicious⊠Probably not the thoughts she should be having with a hot older woman pushing back on her to fucking T-Pain, but sheâs hungry! Liquor gives her the appetite of a fucking rhinosaurous, what can she say!Â
Saliyah and Yuki are handling business for her, though, giving the ladyâs ass very encouraging slaps every time their hips connect. Ellie probably looks like a fucking dumbass as she pumps her fist in the air like an old man, but she canât remember the last time she partied. Sue her!Â
Itâs not until the woman stands upright, her sweaty, nearly bare back pressed against Ellieâs button-up, an arm coming up to loop around her neck, slightly shifting her bow tie that Ellie freezes, her fists clenching even tighter in the air. Her core gives a sharp squeeze when she feels sticky, glossed lips imprint on her throat. Her eyes bulge as she frantically searches for guidance from her friends, but theyâre no fucking help, as usual! What the hell is miming sex and eating pussy going to do for her? She can barely breathe.Â
Her friends shoot her finger guns in encouragement before heading back to the bar. A tongue darts out to lap up her anxiety-induced sweat, and her body tremors, her hands untwisting to land on the girlâs jean covered hips for leverage. She feels teeth beam on her neck and her entire body flushes.Â
âYouâre adorable!â Ellie hears her scream over the blasting music. Her tongue jumbles as she searches for a reply, but nothing leaves. She just drops her head onto the womanâs shoulder⊠and nearly flat lines when she eyes the cleavage sitting taut in her halter top. Her heartâs pulses synch with the ones from her clit when the woman giggles. Ellieâs ninety-five-point six percent sure that her nipples are poking through her shirt.Â
Her teeth sink into the inside of her cheek when the woman spins to face her, chest to chest, noses almost touching. The womanâs gaze drops to her neck, cunning as a fox as she undoes the first button of her shirt before unraveling the loop of her bow tie. She leans in, wafts of cinnamon flooding Ellieâs nostrils.Â
âCome to the bathroom with me?â Ellieâs nodding before the lady can conclude the purr in her ear. Her hand gets snagged and sheâs being dragged through the hot crowd, all the way to the back of the club and shoved into the giant restroom. She finally takes in the goddess in front of her: dark hair, plump lips, pretty lashes. The wrinkles by her eyes and laugh lines are sending dopamine alarms in her brain.Â
Ellie receives one gentle kiss that makes her hips
grind forward before she hears, âYou ever been tied up?â The raven-haired woman mumbles against her mouth. She whines, cheeks burning, âN-No,â she whispers.Â
Her perfect teeth shine, âYou wanna be?âÂ
Does she? âI â yeah, I guess?âÂ
âPut your wrists together,â she hums and Ellie does. Her own bow tie gets looped and twisted around her nimble hands. The woman drops to her knees in front of the trembling girl, massaging her thighs over her jeans, planting kisses all over them, âYou gotta name, honey?âÂ
âEllie⊠MâEllieâŠâ The womanâs hands creep up to unbutton her jeans, the soft hiss of the zipper, âWhatâs yours?â She only receives a shrug. âWhatever you want it to be.â Her jeans are yanked down seconds later, her⊠fucking Cartoon Network boxers drenched all the way through. The woman giggles and calls Ellie a cutie pie and her clit jumps.Â
Her manicured nails hook under the band of Ellieâs boxers, slowly inching them down until her soft, sticky hairs are on display and her boxers are around her knees, âGonna let me eat this pussy out, angel?âÂ
Ellieâs vision whites out. Only for a second, âY-Yes, maâamâŠâ
Ellieâs sopping lips and pulled apart, her red, throbbing clit on display for the fucking witch in front of her. âYouâre so fuckinâ cute. Anybody ever play with this pretty cunt?â Reality crashes down on her like a boulder as images of you touching her, kissing her flash before her eyes. Her jaw slacks as her words flurry.Â
âJust â fuck, just one time.âÂ
âYeah?â She coos, massaging gentle circles on her clit, âI'm your lucky second?â Ellie nods frantically. Her knees buckle when a sharp slap lands on her pussy, âFfuckââ The strokes on her clit are punishing, fast and non-stopping, the womanâs teeth gritted when she asks, âSteppinâ out on your girl, huh?âÂ
Ellie moans around her denial while her cheeks glow, âNâ agh, s-shit, wasnât mâgirlââ
âYeah? She touch you like me?â The woman snickers, and Ellie burns red. Sheâs already so close and she canât fucking think, âThink mâcumminâââ Ellie slurs, her tongue thick in her mouth as her walls squeeze down, desperately trying to pull something, anything in as deep as possible.Â
âCan feel it. Tell me when.â But Ellie couldnât. Her orgasm crashes into her like a fucking truck and her body falls forward, legs trembling as it wracks through her in harsh waves. The thighs that try to close are forced open, sharp stings radiating off her skin from the nails that pierce them. Strong suctions attack Ellieâs clit and she sobs, practically riding the womanâs face. Vibrations from satisfied hums stimulate her further, and she swears sheâs going to pass out.Â
The pleasure builds all over again and her eyes squeeze shut, her hips thrusting forward and into the womanâs mouth. Her optics cycle into her skull when the space right below her clit gets stimulated just right and she rides that edge all over again, but this time, itâs stronger. The womanâs groaning in her pussy like sheâs starving, and Ellie can barely garble her warning of another orgasm.Â
She squeaks when a gentle finger slides between her walls and she wishes it felt like yours did. Ellieâs bound hands entangle in the soft locks and pull, pushing her head any which way to guide her where she needs. She doesnât register that sheâs whining your name until the woman asks, âThaâs your girl?â Right on her pussy, and Ellie tips.
Sheâs so loud when she explodes all over this strangerâs face, wetness coating her inner thighs, dripping all the way down to the bottoms locked around her ankles. You take refuge in the nasty side of her brain as she envisions you between her legs, you making her feel this good. Something about the way you touch her⊠She thinks it's impossible to replicate till this day.Â
When Ellie comes down, she falls against the door, relishing in the steady kitten licks on her twitching bud. One last gentle kiss, and the woman separates from the mess between Ellieâs thighs, chest wet with her juices.Â
âGood, honey?âÂ
Ellie blinks like sheâs risen from the dead, short hair clinging to her forehead. She shoots the woman two thumbs up and she chuckles, untying Ellieâs hands and helping her back onto her feet. The woman helps her redress after she cleans herself up, and Ellieâs nose twitches when her own stickiness latches onto her clothes. Her arms fall back to her sides when her belt gets secured.Â
Sheâs winded when she finally speaks, âUm⊠thanksâŠâ How the fuck does Ellie say goodbye to someone who sucked her soul out?
âNo problemâŠâ The womanâs warm hands are soft as they push away damp strands from Ellieâs forehead. The freckled girl nearly purrs. Call her Pickle at this point.Â
Ellie steps away from the door so that the fucking seductress can exit. The woman backs away and unlocks the door with a gentle smile. âYou should text her.âÂ
Ellieâs stomach churns. â⊠What.âÂ
âThe girl thatâs not your girl.â Thatâs the last thing she says before stepping out. Ellieâs heart plummets when her eyes lock with Saliyahâs, then Yukiâs. Her friends gawk at her disheveled appearance, lipstick stains littered all over her button up. Ellieâs not nearly as embarrassed as she should be; All she can think about is you.Â
âI think Iâm in trouble.â Ellie states mindlessly.
âDoesnât look like it.â Yuki snickers and pulls Ellie out of the bathroom. She hides her face when sheâs met with the long line of people desperately needing to piss.Â
WEEK SEVEN WITH DOCTOR BROWN.
âYou look bright.âÂ
You feel brighter. Just a little bit. Youâve finally gotten your locs retwisted.Â
âAmaya texted me back.â Dr. Brown seems impressed at your statement, happy for you. A small smile makes its way onto your face.Â
âYeah? Whatâd Ms. Producer say?âÂ
âShe, um⊠She wants to have dinner.âÂ
âOh? And whatâd you say?âÂ
âI said of course and then sobbed until I got here.â Dr. Brown chuckles, âWhenâs the big meal?âÂ
âIn two days. I got a hotel near where sheâs at, so⊠Yeah. Probably wonât see me for a little.âÂ
âGood for you, honey.â She says proudly, âHeard from any others?â Your head shakes. Itâs not surprising that Abby and Ellie havenât reached out to you. They donât owe you any closure, even though it took you a while to accept your karma.Â
âProgress is progress, nonetheless.â Her tone reverts back to stern, âRemember⊠when you see that girl, donât expect anything to come from it. Sheâs going out of her way to speak with you, not the other way around.âÂ
Your head bows shamefully. You're incredibly nervous to see your best friend⊠if you deserve to call her that anymore. Anxiety isnât foreign to you, but youâre anticipating the worst for your meeting. Youâd give anything to mend your relationship with Amaya, but howâre you going to be able to overcome the guilt of abandoning her?
You canât remember the last time you went to the campus coffee shop.Â
When Amaya sent you her new address in the middle of your old college city, you sobbed for half an hour. Youâre not sure why considering the entirety of your graduating class is gone (hopefully in hell); Itâs a mix of emotions coming back here. The baristas that used to work here have been replaced with new bushy-tailed freshmen with under eye bags. The coffee isnât the best, but itâs oddly nostalgic. You feel fucking old just looking at their bright customer service smiles.
Your attention gets snagged away from your steaming cup when a sharp gasp echoes from behind you, nearly spilling your drink all over your flannel when someone calls your name. Anxiety spikes in your gut when you seeâŠÂ
Who is that?Â
âOh my goodness! Sweetheart!â An older woman with gray hair and a cardigan places her hand on your shoulder and your eyes bulge out of your skull. âItâs so good to see you!â
What the fuck is going on? âYou... You, too, uh⊠maâam!â You put on the most believable smile you can. Is your memory really this fucking bad?
âStudents donât usually stick around after this long! Our major was pretty small, you know how it is.â Major⊠Students⊠Graphic design⊠Professor! Your memory clicks but her name doesnât. What the fuck is this womanâs name! You feel like a cunt all over again!Â
âIâd love to catch up if youâre sticking around!âÂ
âUm⊠yeah, of course.â Her smile is bright when she enters the line. Relief floods through you when she gets to the service counter and one of the baristas says good morning, Professor Meyers!Â
You silently thank the Lord.Â
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âWhat brings you back to town, honey!â Professor Meyers asks excitedly.Â
âUm⊠just missinâ school, I guess.â You lie. Fuck this school.Â
She swallows her sip of tea before pausing, âWow. First time I heard that. I didnât see you at graduation!âÂ
Your chest concaves and your face burns, âI, uh. I didnât graduate. I dropped out.â Professor Meyers' expression drops, pity written all over her face.Â
âWhâ Why?âÂ
You shut down her interrogation, âI just⊠stuff happened. I couldnât handle everything all at once.â Her eyes sadden and she places a comforting hand on top of yours.Â
âIâm so sorry, honey. Whatever it was⊠I hope itâs okay, now.âÂ
âGetting through it.â You shrug, feigning nonchalance. The air is suddenly suffocating.Â
âYâknow⊠if youâre interestedâŠâ Professor Meyersâ tone is suggesting. Your brow quirks at the woman plotting in front of you.Â
âSome of the art profs are always looking for some extra help for the introductory courses. Your rough drafts were always pretty spectacular.âÂ
Your body burns. âThank you.âÂ
She smiles and reaches into her bag in the other chair, pulling out a small card and handing it to you. âThis is my contact information. I can set you an interview with Professor Ronson if youâd wanna join the little alumni support team.âÂ
You accept her card, âBut Iâm not⊠I didnât graduateâ â
âOh, hush now! If you go to college, youâre an alumni! These exclusive rules are outdated!â Professor Meyers stands with her bag and tea. âI gotta run, but please consider it! It could be a great marketing opportunity for you!âÂ
You're left to simmer in your thoughts as she rushes out of the cafe. You didnât even have the chance to tell her that you havenât touched a canvas since your fatherâs funeral.Â
You waltz into the upscale restaurant with tied lungs. Prepping an outfit for tonight was a hassle; You were forced to rummage through your fatherâs closet for suitable attire. You canât remember the last time you made a purchase for yourself.Â
You feel out of place standing here with the⊠upper class. Theyâre dressed to the nines and itâs incredibly intimidating. Your eyes cast downward to your wrinkly shirt and blazer; Why didnât you bring a fucking iron?Â
âHow can I help you, miss?â
Your eyes bulge when they lock with the hostâs and gut churns with discomfort. Your legs wobble closer to the counter, âIâ thereâs⊠reservationâŠâ
The host stares at you with utter confusion, âOh, sure! Whatâs the name?âÂ
âUm⊠Amayaâ â
âMs. Robinson?â The hostâs eyes fill with glitter, âOh my gosh, when I saw her walk in earlier, I was like, no way sheâs actually here. This is crazy! But it was really her! I couldnât believeâ â
Another host interjects, âMy apologies, maâam! Sheâs a bit, uh, excited. Your table is right this way.â The host begins walking, and your feet move on autopilot, âWould you like a menu?âÂ
âNo. Iâm good, thanks.â You wonât be able to keep anything down anyway.Â
You move through bustling walkways, ears filled with bouts of obnoxious laughter and corny jokes with each table you pass.Â
Your heart stutters in your chest when you see the isolated leather and rosewood booth where Amaya sits, her back to you. Thereâs two glasses and a bottle of⊠something on the table.Â
âMs. Robinson! Your guest is here!âÂ
Amaya, filled glass in hand, cranes her neck and meets your flitting gaze. Her eyes are stagnant, unmoving, and your nerves wrack. She looks fucking immaculate with the slit in her black dress, smokey makeup, heeled
shoes. Sheâs dressed down for a fucking funeral. Yours.Â
Youâre actually not ready to see her. Youâre not ready at all.Â
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âYou want a glass?âÂ
Amayaâs tone is cold. Colder than the dripping neck of the bottle right in front of you. âN-No thank you.âÂ
She scoffs laughter around the rim, âShocking.â You scramble for a reply, anything to say to the woman oozing impatience in front of you.Â
âIâm sorry.â You whisper. She sets her glass down with an unsteady clink.Â
âYou said that already.â She states, brown eyes sharp. âWhy are you?âÂ
You scratch at your ear, trying to mask the tremors in your fingertips, âBecause⊠I â I wasnâtâŠâÂ
âI donât hear from you for months,â She spits, âAnd then I get a phone call from my drunk best friend screaminâ at me, tellinâ me that I fucking left her to grieve by herself⊠because Iâm selfish and money hungry⊠Right?â
Angry tears sizzle in Amayaâs eyes as she continues, âAnd I still come and visit you⊠only to get a door slammed in my fuckinâ face.âÂ
Youâre completely frozen; You can barely look her in the eye. Your hands are clenched together under the table, nausea creeping up your throat. âI⊠thereâs no excuse for what I didâ â
Amayaâs eyes are void, âWhy did you do it.âÂ
âI donât know how to explain it,â you rush out, desperate. Youâre losing her, âHe â I was just â I couldnât control myself and I screamed and yelled and blamed everyone for what happened. I was just so mad and I couldnât stopâ â
âAbby called me two days ago.âÂ
You gasp, âS-She didâ?âÂ
âShe told me she hated you.â Amaya says plainly. The remaining shards of your heart dissipate like dust, leaving your mouth when you whimper, âO-Okay.â Tears stream down your cheeks and neck, harsh sniffles filling the small corner of the restaurant. âShe hasnât, um⊠never mind.â Thatâs why she hasnât reached out, you suppose. Well deserved.Â
âI don't⊠hate you, you know that, right?âÂ
You sob, palms in your eyes, âSâokay if you do. I deserve it.âÂ
She shrugs, âI donât. Iâm just very disappointed in you.â You nod in agreement, in understanding. You accept that this is probably the last time youâll ever see someone you considered a sister.Â
âIâm so sorry, Mayâ â
âMâgonna head out. Iâm,â She wipes a tear and grabs her bag, throwing a hundred-dollar bill on the table. âI⊠I donât hate you.â You cry as you watch Amaya gather herself, stand, and leave without another word. You heave and attempt to dry your face with the fresh napkin but they wonât stop flowing.Â
Itâs difficult, accepting that youâre undeserving. That youâve dug yourself into a hole that you canât escape. Itâs dark and cold and youâre desperate for comfort but it never comes because you chased it all away. You eye the tall bottle that sweats; Very tempting, but you leave it where it stands. The blame for your downfall is yours to take; The only reward you can receive now is from your upkeep. To dig yourself out from beneath the maggot-infested dirt. To resurface and recover what you can.Â
Youâre unsure how long you sit here crying. Devastation sets hard in your tummy when you stand to leave the restaurant, ignoring the judgmental stares from the annoying, old fuckers that wouldnât stop glaring at you.Â
The air outside is fresh and soothing as you walk, right past your parked car. Past the young people mingling and taking pictures. Past the girl doing graffiti on the old building across the street. Something beats in your chest when you eye her spray paint cans, brushes in her hand, the bright colors all over her bare arms. Her passion is evident, even from a distance, and you miss that. That feeling that takes over when you create something that no one else can replicate. Her style is unique to her just like yours is to you.Â
Color sparks in your soul for the first time in a year, and you know what you have to do tomorrow morning.Â
taggiesss yasss n slayyyy @dyk3ang3l @ellieloml @inf3ct3dd @fromminaa @womenofarcane @sawaagyapong @mina-281 @aouiaa @bbglmfao @i00rii @sakiigami @starologist @southelroys @diddiqueen @trackinglessons @ellieswhorcrux @villainousbear @p4ison1vy @tohoko @yuckyfucky @dollyfleurs @elsbunny222 @sevsbimbo @amiorca @alittlextrahoney @gato-chino @topiatwin @r3wbeef @elliesatchel @muthafuckingstargirl
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gift basket (e.w.)
kinda cont. to this :3 meep
wc;cw: 1.6k, return of pothead!ellie and her pothead gf, weed duh, parties, mention of psychs but no actual psychs lol, fluff⊠UNHEARD OF, flirting and a lil sexual tension, something quick bc i miss her fr
âyou tryna do acid?â you call from ellieâs small dining table, rolling up for the two of you. ellieâs attention is yanked from her device, gawking from where she sits on the couch, decked in her usual party attire: all black everything from head to toe. âthe fuck did you just say?âÂ
âyou tryna do acid?â you repeat, sealing the blunt. ellieâs eyes flick around the living room, jolting down to the blunt in your hand before they lock with yours.Â
â. . . why the fuck would i do that before a party?â ellie snorts, removing and tossing her reading glasses on the coffee table before returning back to some annoying show about a blue cat with bunny for a sister. neither of you are high yet and sheâs already in hysterics, wildly cackling and shoveling parmesan goldfish in her mouth.
ellie. . . oh, ellie.Â
why wonât she fucking touch you?Â
after your intense smoke session on pothead christmas, your relationship has gotten strange. not strange in a bad way; she never hesitates to invite you over to spark up, pick you up for late night drives, have study sessions (where she watches you study with eyes tinted pink). everything is exactly the same, but you donât want it to be.Â
itâs been a month since she smoked you out and rambled about her sex life, since you asked â begged her to kiss you. at this point, you would accept a fucking peck, for sucks sake! but she brushes you off every time, pushes you right back into that best friend box after every hot box. youâve given her every sign to put it down on you, and sheâs receptive. the stares she gives you, the lingering touches, the seemingly doting affection that shines beneath her pupils. itâs all there and. . . not at the same time.Â
but here you are again. igniting her fucking bud before you roll out to another frat house. being high and horny simultaneously is your greatest weakness. . . especially when your little crush looks this fucking good.Â
âyouâre so far away.â ellie lures gently from the cushions, âcâmeeere, iâm cold.âÂ
â. . . itâs almost june.â you note flatly. she rolls her eyes and blows a raspberry, climbing over the back of the couch and sliding in next to you, eyes glued to your working hands. she pinches the blunt between her thumb and index finger. âitâs fat as fuck, jesus christ.â she mumbles in amazement. fucking geek.Â
âitâs yours. say thank you.â ellie gasps in delight and throws her arms around your neck, bending down to smack kisses on your cheek, mumbling thank you, thank you, thank you! you canât hide your smile when you throw hers in your little baggie before shoving it in her front pocket. you pat it for good luck. âdonât crush them like you did last time. iâm gonna be hot,â you scold lightly and ellie smirks against your cheek.Â
âi dunno. youâre pretty hot already.â she purrs against your face. you push her away and she giggles, jogging to get her shoes on. you follow in her lead and lace up, praying to god that she doesnât sit on the fucking bag in the uber.Â
ellie canât stop staring at this fucking lava lamp.Â
itâs gorgeous, really. . . the bright colors, the holographic glitter, the fucking. . . clay balls. are they clay? they look like stress toys floating around in uncooked egg whites that've been injected with fairy vomitâ
âellie!âÂ
she feels like sheâs underwater, but not in a drowning, iâm-gonna-die way. she feels like a mermaid as she searches the room at your call, tunnel vision centering on every drunk face until she finds yours. you're actually right in front of where she sits on the love seat. . . right in front of someone else. . . whoâs directly behind you. . . who the fuck is that?Â
your brows are pulled down in concern as you shout over the blaring music, asking her if she feels okay, if she wants to leave, but sheâs not focused on none of that. . . her high is about to go left in a second if this bitch doesnât stop squeezing your ass. ellie sends you an affirming look even though her blood is sizzling beneath her skin and you nod in acknowledgement, returning your attention back to whoever youâre throwing it on.Â
. . . would it be fucked up if she busted this lava lamp over this broadâs head? she doesnât think so.Â
she barely registers it. the small display in front of her is nauseating. ellieâs known you forever, and never once have you accepted a rip from somebody you didnât know. . . so why the fuck are you ripping from a bitch you donât know? the end of the blunt sparks a bright orange with your heavy puff, the carbon you didnât inhale ghosting in front of your mouth. smoke leaves through your nose as you giggle, the fucking. . . bum whispering something in your ear with a tight squeeze on your waist.Â
youâre shaking your head like you like it, like youâre approving of this fuckery and ellie almost vomits. she stands too quickly for her legs because she plops back down like an utter buffoon, the world spinning like a pinball. her arms extend as she searches for balance while sitting andâ
whatever the fuck she was going to say vanishes when your hands come down on her shoulders, comfortingly squeezing them through her sweaty shirt. softly. ellie turns to mush as she tries to read your lips. . . maybe she shouldnât do that; it looks like youâre saying donât be gay. . . but ellie is gay and so are you so how the fuck would that work?
sheâs being scooped up by you and. . . yeah, sheâs very faded. ellieâs always prided herself in having a high tolerance to the dirty green, but sheâs on one tonight. what the fuck did you put in that shit? is this why you asked her to do acid earlier? because you laced her shit? she can feel her palms getting clammy as you walk her down a dark ass hallway. . . if she had that lava lamp, maybe she could seeâ
a door slams shut and a lock clicks. itâs suddenly bright. ellieâs convinced she made it to heaven. . . especially when her vision focuses and sheâs met with the angel that you are, eyes sparkly and twinkling like fairies in a meadow. god let her in the pearly gates. . .Â
âyou okay, baby? needa throw up?â your hand is on her cheek, thumb gently massaging the skin. her heartâs singing. ellieâs entranced by you and her skin heats. . . her pussy also skips a beat. a little one-two.Â
â. . . babyâs okay.â she mumbles. why is her tongue so heavy? you coo at her, âwanna go home?â
ellie nods, âfuck that bitch you were grindinâ on. hope she breaks her neck. . . or somethinâ crazy, i dunno.â you choke on laughter and pull her in for a gentle hug. ellieâs heavy arms enclose around your waist. tightly. selfishly.Â
âyou mad i wasnât grinding on you?âÂ
âduh! the fuck. . .â she slurs. âi should be grabbing ass, âs my. . . sâmine, fuck you.â youâre giggling into her neck and she shoves a hand in your back pocket.Â
âyou needa bed.â you shake your head.Â
âyeah, so i can dig you out in itâ â
âELLIEâ â
her laughter is uncontrollable, âyeeeah, youâre fucking mine. no more hoes for you.âÂ
youâre burning hot when your eyes open. . . because thereâs a fucking body on top of you!
you and ellie are slung across the couch cushions, party clothes still on. ellie mustâve been awake for a minute because she sighs, breath hitting your tummy, âdid you try to kill me yesterday? be honest.âÂ
â. . . bitch. . .â
âiâve never been that high . . . well, thatâs not trueâ â
âexactly.â you snicker, âhow long you been up?âÂ
she holds up her wrist to check her imaginary stopwatch, âapproximately. . . three minutes and thirty-fiâ six secondsâ â
âi fuckinâ hate you. get the fuck off me.âÂ
âhmm. . . nah, iâm good right here.âÂ
ellieâs head shifts on your stomach and you know sheâs staring up at you, âi needa fucking showerâ â
âme, too. with me?â you hear the smile in her tone. you finally gawk down at her. âyouâre never hitting my shit again. whatâs up with you?âÂ
her eyes crystallize when she shrugs, âhad another dream about giving you head and now i gotta do it. follow your dreams, or whatever they say.âÂ
your jaw is on the floor and your stomach is in knots. âellieââ you gasp.Â
âno, iâm not still high, and no i donât wanna just fuck. kinda obsessed with you if last night wasnât obvious.â she speaks so casually and itâs giving you whiplash. âi almost committed murder. thatâs how pissed i was.âÂ
âa-at me?âÂ
ellieâs eyes roll, âoh my god, no. at whoever that freak was from last night. . . i donât wanna talk about that shit anymore. i have trauma.âÂ
her tongue rolls over her lips and she eyes you like a vulture to a carcass, âi dunno if you ever used that shower head when you sleep over but. . . it goes crazy.â her proposal makes you squirm and she smirks, planting a kiss on the skin of your belly. followed by another. . . and another a little lower.Â
âyou my girl?â she whispers against your skin, staring up at you, tongue poking out just barely to swipe on the plush area.Â
â. . . maybe.â you mumble shyly, and ellieâs teeth beam. she sits up to stand and pulls you with her, guiding you out of the living room and down the hallway, into the bathroom. she snags her lighter off the counter and ignites her favorite cinnamon candle, the wick nearly gone. âfor ambiance.â she whispers with a grin.Â
you unbuckle the belt looped in your jeans, âpulling out the big words, huh?â
âcall me thesaurus the way i make that pussy talk.â she expects you to laugh, but you donât. you almost grab your shit and leave. . . but her laughter sounds like wedding bells.Â
âjust take your clothes off.â you say dryly.Â
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SIKKKEEE COCKBLOCK SEASON MERRY NEW YEAR OR WHATEVER HAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAA
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tag, you're it! (e.w.)
ITS PRIDE MONTH PUSSSSSSYYYYYYYÂ
omg this is kindaaaaâŠ. yeah
imma lil proud LOL hope yâall like itÂ
wc;cw: 14.2k, ceosdaughter!ellie, tagger/artist!oc, ANGST!!, mentions of depression and suicidal ideation, illness, parental death & brief mentions of funerals, descriptions of foster care/homeless shelters and poverty, both oc n ellie have daddy issues, MOMMY ISSUES!!, brief mentions of drug addiction(coke), homophobia DURING PRIDE MONTHđ€šđ€š, internalized homophobia and misogyny, ellie is a horny touch starved loser n kinda stalkerish?, mentions of criminal injustice(police, prisons, etc.) i hate it here, rich ppl being demons, SMUT!!!!! MDNI!!!!, light descriptions of masturbation, potential dubcon!!, sexual tensionđ, bratty subbottom!ellie, mean domtop!oc she carries her dick on her like a glock lol, slight fearplay, KNIFE PLAY/BLOOD, DIRTY TALK, finger and strap sucking, fingering, pussy eating, MOMMY KINK!!, nipple play, squirting <333 n creaming <333, riding, reverse cowgirl, slapping(FACE!!! ass titties), hitting it from the bbbbback, loss of virginity, masochism LOL, a lil ass play LOL, pretty taboo themes catch it
âSheâs⊠I genuinely believe sheâs deranged, your honor! Sheâs⊠uncontrollable! Look at what sheâs done to our city! Civilians can see her tracks everywhere they go, and itâs disgusting! Not to mention sheâs a pervert!âÂ
You rolled your eyes as you listened to the high-pitched, ongoing shrieks of one of the wealthiest women in the state as she spat belittlements of you to the judge.Â
You were⊠fucked.Â
You adjusted in your uncomfortable chair, leaning back and crossing your arms over your chest, turning your head to eye your lawyer, arching a brow at him as you waited for his defenses for you. He looked⊠scared shitless, to say the least.Â
Yeah. You were definitely going to fucking jail.Â
Were these pieces of shit really going to treat you like Satan himself for pulling a measly, little prank? Has April Fools truly lost all meaning?
A couple of days ago, on April 1st, you took it upon yourself to spray paint âĄGIRLDICK⥠across the largest building in the city, which just so happened to be owned by the Miller family, if anyone even bothered to call their cultist bond that. Their wealth swiftly accumulated when the now deceased founder of the organization, Joel Miller, discovered some new form of AI technology⊠or whatever the elders at the shelter told you. His death shook your city years ago; You werenât sure why it was so moving for people, but R.I.P, you guess.Â
You assumed they were just another group of elitist fuckers, but he mustâve been decent at the most; You still remember his memorial broadcasting on the small TV at the shelter as the other residents mourned in solace.Â
Regardless, you hope all their institutions across the nation collapse one day, preferably with the rest of them inside.Â
The broad in the black, silk suit kept pointing her finger at you, and it took everything in your spirit to not get up out of your seat and rip it clean off her hand and shove it down her throat.Â
Not every tag youâve done around the city has been rooted in âperversionâ. Thereâs nothing perverse about⊠loving girldick. Itâs a way of life!
Fuck security cameras.Â
Unbeknownst to them, youâve already been coined as a hidden talent in the city, at least according to some people you know at the shelter. Youâre faceless in the eye of the public, but that separation doesnât negate their appreciation for your artwork. You even went viral for the mural you painted of your father for his birthday two years ago, even though the fucker that posted it on Instagram hadnât included your signature. You could bet millions of people have seen it by now, and you gained absolutely nothing from it.Â
But, of course, your form of creative expression was being reduced to a jizzing penis. You've created countless mosaics around the city that represent the purest forms of love and sex, and now you are being blasted for being some sort of corrupt sicko. You only drew what came natural to you, and if people felt a way about it, they could choke on the fattest girldick known to humanity. You hate rich people.
Your father didnât sacrifice everything he had to teach you the complexities of sketching for your name to be attached to outlines of dicks. You didnât grow up watching your father skip meals so he could get you a new water paint set for your birthday every year for your art to be lawfully ridiculed. The only comfort this situation brought was that you knew he wouldâve found the sloppily drawn cock hysterical. You still remember his laugh after all this time.Â
You miss him dearly. You probably couldâve been just as rich, if not more, as the bitch at the other table if he was still here with you. He wouldâve ensured you didnât stray off into the life you live now.Â
Being in foster care was the dissipation of your joy. You were considered a problem child very early on: fighting the caretakers when they tried to calm you, cursing at them, stealing, and nobody wanted to adopt you because of that, regardless of your talents. You were set up to fail too early, and you despised the world because of it.Â
Your record was horrendous, and you were going to jail. You fucking hate rich people.
⊠Except the Miller's eldest daughter. She gets a pass.Â
And she keeps staring at you.Â
Every time you caught her sparkly eyes, she blushed and looked forward, her freckles surrounded by a deep red that rushed down her neck. She was dressed much less⊠sophisticated than her mother: her hair tied back in a low bun and littered with black bobby-pins, a dark-blue sweater, rings on her thumb, black pants, and clean Vanz.Â
You knew a lesbian when you saw one. You could barely hide your knowing smirk.Â
âMy child doesnât need to be exposed to such⊠nauseating ideologies! Think of the children of the city and what theyâre forced to see because of vile people like that,â she pointed at you again. You were this fucking close to stabbing her with that pen in front of you.Â
Your daughterâs gay, Mrs. Miller.Â
âWith all due respect, maâam,â the judge started. What kind of backwards shit was this; Wasnât she supposed to be respecting him? âItâs important that we stay on track. Youâre specifically suing her for vandalismâ â
âOngoing, unchecked vandalism! This is not her first charge, your honor, itâs her seventh! Sheâs⊠sheâsâ â
You tried to tune her out, looking around the congested space of the courtroom, and you caught eyesâshiny, green eyesâ on you. Again.Â
She was fiddling with her hands in her lap, her teeth picking at the dry skin on her bottom lip. But she didnât look away this time. You watched her eyes trail over your face, down to your jaw, your neck, your chest, only to come back up to your eyes.Â
You did the same, taking in the dots on her soft cheeks, her eyes, her pretty nose, and mouth, looking her up and down, biting your lip, letting her know you were gauging her. She was cute, you had to admit.Â
ââsentenced to three years in federal prisonâ â
You looked up in shock, feeling like your body had been dunked into a tub of ice water and left to die, instantly stiffening at the announcement of your sentence, the sound of the slamming gavel nearly putting you six feet under.Â
You couldnât do anything but stare at the judge in disbelief as he organized his papers emotionlessly, your lawyer putting his hand on your shoulder. You knocked it off and glared at him. You looked over to the table, the family already up and taking their leave, Mrs. Millerâs hand tightly enclosed around her daughterâs wrist as she dragged her out the wooden doors.
Two security guards were already walking towards you with cuffs, gripping your arms too roughly to pull you up out of your seat and latching the metal around your skin. You started to panic as they walked you towards another set of doors.
âWait, wait, my backpack, I need myâ â
âYou arenât allowed to have anything on you. Your property will be held by the court until further notice.âÂ
âButâ â
âNo buts, and donât resist,â you felt the security grip your arm harder, and your anxiety peaked, your panting breaths hardly leaving your body.
You didnât resist. You couldnât. Your life was shattering around you in slow motion, loose shards slicing through you with intent to kill.Â
You allowed the brawly men to drag you⊠anywhere. You didnât care anymore; You were tired, and no longer had the urge to fight left in your heart.Â
Ellie was brought up in isolation.Â
Homeschooled, no friends, no purpose outside of being the vessel to represent her family name, creating the next line of heirs for her fatherâs company.Â
The benefits of his successes had simply⊠appeared when she was fifteen.Â
She remembered how he went from being present, gave her the utmost attention, played sports with her, taught her how to sing and self-defense with his past down switchblade, to not, completely cut off from society as he barricaded himself in his study and worked relentlessly on new forms of technology. Being an only child brought nothing but loneliness for her after a while.Â
But then they were rich. They moved to an affluent neighborhood and into a two-story house in a matter of months, driving Porches and buying out stores. Wealth appeared, but the relationship with her family suffered because of it.Â
Her father fell ill, and after a multitude of hospital visits, teary farewells, and a memorial, he was gone. Merely a memory that hardly seemed real. Her and her motherâs relationship became even more unsteady after his passing.Â
Ellieâs mother swiftly took over the company in an almost authoritarian way. She interacted with society in a robotic, rehearsed manner. Mechanical, soulless, the only proof of her humanity exposing itself when she snorted white powder.Â
Her mother had brought up the idea of marriage the second she turned eighteen, a year before her fatherâs passing, saying that there were multiple well-off men that were eager to be with her, willing to give her children. Multiple.Â
MenâŠ. children⊠having children with men. Money. The empire. Her mother.
It all made her nauseous.Â
⊠But art didnât.Â
Sheâd always kept her journals secret. Left in a box on the highest shelf of her walk-in closet where the maids couldnât find them.
She expressed everything that she couldnât to her mother on paper. Her depression, her insomnia, her desire for death, her mourning, the need for sex with non-men, any form of physical connection, somethingâanything that made her feel human, normal.
She needed a fucking hug. A kiss. Sex. She wanted to fuck.
The first time she saw your artwork on an abandoned building as she chauffeured to the museum, sheâd nearly fainted.Â
Itâd been two women on top of each other, the most intimate parts of their body covered with the otherâs hands and skin. One had her head between the otherâs legs atop blankets and flowers as the other⊠apparently in the middle of an orgasm. Her mother always made the point of sex sound so⊠stiff. Lifeless. Merely a factor of procreation.
But your art was so erotic. Sensual. So full of pleasure and softness and care.Â
Sheâd almost jumped out of the car and onto oncoming traffic to get a closer look at every detail, but the car was too quick. She couldnât even get a fucking picture.Â
And she was soaking. How the fuck was she going to explore a museum when she was dripping like this?!Â
Youâd given her one of the strongest orgasms sheâd ever had in her life when she returned home that day, and she didnât even know who you were. Sheâd spent hours with her hand between her legs as she thought of your creation while her mother was out working, moaning and crying out as loud as she wanted, and she wasnât even embarrassed.Â
She would sneak out in the darkest clothes she had when her mother passed out on the couch, and just walk. Specifically in search for anything with your signature that sheâd memorized like it was her own. Sheâd taken pictures of your content, memorized them, got off to the suggestive ones in secret, and appreciated your love and passion for your craft.Â
Sheâd even started recreating her own depictions of eroticism. All with women. They never looked the same: different heights, all skin tones and body types, anything that she could think of, she drew it. Sheâd tried to envision what you looked like after only a few weeks, and she prayed her envisions were at least somewhat accurate.Â
She never could draw self-portraits with precision, but she knew it was her. She was always in the middle of the raunchiness that she conjured up in her mind, being touched everywhere, tied up, beaten, completely ripped apart and forced to forget the suffocating world around her. Her reimagining's of herself would be drowned in pleasure, sometimes by you, by herself, by faceless strangers. Anything she wanted.Â
When she saw you for the first time, she almost couldnât control herself.Â
Sheâd felt like a fucking creep as she ducked behind parked cars to watch you paint all over an abandoned freight train behind a trashed building. The streets had been silent as she watched you decorate the metal cart in floral interpretations of pussy, her heart in her throat.Â
You looked gorgeous and focused and tired. So, so tired, only in sweats and a tank top with a hefty bag strapped to your back. She assumed you kept your art supplies in there.
Ellie couldnât keep her eyes off you when sheâd seen you during your court hearing.Â
You were just as gorgeous as the first time she saw you, but, somehow, even more exhausted. Far away, not really present, but she couldnât blame you. And she couldnât stop staring, enthralled by you. Even in your grayest moments, you made her feel vibrant. And that brought her guilt.
But it also made her lustful. Hungry.Â
And she couldnât stop staring.Â
When her mother dragged her out of the hearing, she was enraged, even more so when she degraded you on the way back to the car.Â
You fucking stared at that whore the whole time!
Donât ever, in your life, embarrass me again.Â
Iâll throw you in the gutter with that rat if you ever disrespect me like you just did in there. Do you understand?
Ellie didnât even know what she did to garner a response this aggressive, but she was used to it. And, for the first time in her life, she didnât care. She didnât give a fuck.Â
At that moment, she knew what she had to do.
It was your fifth day in prison, and you felt nothing.Â
You didnât cry, you didnât plead, you simply succumbed to your destiny in silence. Your father would be so disappointed if he were alive.Â
I raised a fighter, so you fucking fight!
But you couldnât. You were tired, and you wished you could stay asleep, never to wake up again.
Youâve been working like a dog since you got here, and you accepted it. This was your life, and you felt nothing.Â
Until your cell unlocked. These fuckers were probably here to shit talk you again.Â
They cuffed your wrists and led you somewhere. You didnât care where, keeping your head down as they encased your arms in a calloused grasp. You hoped this location would be your last forever.Â
They led you into an empty room and uncuffed you. You saw the old sweatsuit that youâd received from the shelter, and your heartbeat sped up. You looked at the security in confusion. What the fuck were they doing? What were they about to do?
You could barely hear what the officers were saying, jumbled words of bail bond and cash payments molding together and sounding like a foreign language to you. They undid your handcuffs and pointed towards the clothes, murmuring for you to change so they could transport you back to the courthouse to retrieve your belongings.Â
What the fuck is going on?
When you returned to the shelter, you inspected your bag. After nearly scrubbing your skin off while showering.Â
The contents were all in their original condition, each individual item wrapped in plastic with small notes attached to them. Except for your dick. You assumed the court had no comments.Â
Your paint, your brushes, random hairpins, your notebooks. They were all there in their original condition. Thank god.Â
What you didnât expect to see was a new jacket, sweatsuit, and small note wrapped in the same plastic from inspection.Â
You ripped the plastic open and retrieved the note, unfolding it and⊠confusion, arousal, and fear rushed through you, shocking your body as all your feelings shot down your spine.Â
It was a sketch of⊠you. And a girl bent over with her hands bound behind her back as you fucked her. An⊠incredibly familiar looking girl.Â
A freckled girl. A rosy-cheeked girl. The rosy-cheeked girl from a week ago with the psychotic, sadistic mother.
Her expression in the sketch was pure ecstasy. It looked like she was screaming, her cheeks shaded dark with water-paint and her hair a reddish-brown, thrown in all sorts of directions. Her eyes wild and erotic. Yearning. Teary. Her pleasure seemed dream-like.
And you looked just as gone. Head tossed back, sweaty with your dick shoved inside her pussy, your nails digging into the soft skin on her hips, small, but deep, bloody scratches following the painful glide of your fingertips that make the red blotches on her backside. There were small doodles of strap-ons and pussies smudged, erased, fixed to perfection that seemed almost manic. Obsessive.Â
You looked at the bottom of the crumpled piece of paper, a small signature across the bottom of it.Â
âĄGIRLDICKâĄ
Come back home. Five days.
E.M.
⊠Come back home? You donât have a fucking home. And who the fuck is E.M? Your heart was beating against your chest, climbing up your throat in an attempt to escape your body entirely. You couldnât stop your eyes from flying across the sloppy penmanship.Â
⊠âĄGIRLDICKâĄ
E.M.
M.Â
âĄGIRLDICKâĄ
M.
⊠Miller Enterprise.Â
Miller.Â
⊠Freckles.Â
âŠ. What in the fuck.Â
It was almost dark, and you were shivering as the wind blew past you.Â
It had been five days.Â
You were eyeing the large building in front of you from across the street, a giant M slapped across the top of it, windows galore, hoodie on your head and trembling hands shoved in your pockets.Â
You could see the last bit of employees trickling out of the building, clad in suits and tight pencil skirts, heavy briefcases and clicking heels.Â
You could also see the fresh white and black paint covering where your spray-painted dick used to be, and it made you chuckle to yourself. You were almost tempted to recreate it with your new snagged bottle of acrylic. It supposedly glowed in the dark.Â
But then you saw a dark shadow in the corner of your eye, hurriedly moving past the glass of the entrance.Â
Your heart raced instantly at the thought of being discovered, and you followed the body's movement. You could see it was Ellie the closer she got to the glass, dressed in a black sweater and comfortable pants, and her same shoes from the court hearing. She looked antsy, a bit on edge, but curious. She was anticipating seeing you.Â
You could see her messing with the keypad on the door, the loud sounds of locks clicking over the bustling streets. Flashes of red, swiftly replaced with flashes of green shined through the maxi-glass, and she looked around at all the doors. What was she checking for?
She seemed satisfied with her job, and she slid the entry door open, leaving it slightly ajar so she could slip something between it.Â
She gave one last glance at the system before bolting back inside and down the lengthy hallway before all the hall lights shut off.Â
Did she⊠did she just disable all the alarms for you?Â
Now, you were the one anticipating meeting her.Â
You ran across the street the second you got a chance, hurdling through traffic before running up onto the sidewalk and treading the stairs.Â
You looked down and noticed two pens taped together, holding the door open. You picked them up and inspected them, a glossy, silver M near the gel tip.Â
You stepped inside before anyone noticed, the door automatically shutting behind you before the same green lights came on, a robotic voice confirming that the doors were locked.
You were inside the Miller Enterprise, and you were terrified.
Ellie was so nervous.Â
Sheâd been checking her Chanel watch all day, obsessively monitoring the windows to see if anyone that resembled your form had arrived, but she was disappointed every time she looked. No sign of you, yet.
The later it got, the more anxious she became. Did you see the note she left in your bag? Was it too forward? Did you think she was fucking crazy? Did you hate her for what her mother did? She prayed not.Â
She was currently pacing around her motherâsâfatherâsâdark office, every step of her shoes echoing in the nearly empty room. She hasnât been in here since she was seventeen, and it brought just as much anxiety as it did the first time.Â
This will all be yours when Iâm gone, donât fucking ruin it.Â
She hated everything about this space. Every aspect of her dad was completely gone. All his pictures, his vinyl, his pens and pencils, his nameplate. Everything. All of it, completely void of emotion.Â
She hated it, she hated it.Â
But then she heard a clang in the hallway, and her anxiety picked up even more before she could process it.Â
She quickly made her way over to the exit, peeking her head through the doorframe and examining the hallway, searching for you. The noise had to be you! You really came! She could feel her nipples getting hard already.
But she saw no one. No one was in the dark hallway.Â
⊠Fuck.
Why did she shut the system off? The lights wouldnât come on!
Her hands instantly got clammy, her heart racing, and her knees shook. She hadn't felt like this since she was a kid, and she was horrified.
Someoneâs here to hurt you, someoneâs going to come in and hurt you!
You never leave doors unlocked! He always said to lock your doors, never, never, neverâ
She couldnât stop the intrusive thoughts from taking over her entire body, reaching into her pocket and pulling out her fatherâs switchblade, pressing its latch down to expose the blade. She slammed the door shut and walked over to the large window and tried to steady her breathing. She looked out of the glass and inhaled harshly.Â
Keep your grip tight when you strike!Â
Calm down calm down calm downâ
âBoo.âÂ
You saw Ellie jump with a hard gasp before spinning to face you, a fearful look on her face and her switchblade in hand, pointed edge towards you.Â
You could see her chest rise up and down with every shaky breath she took, her body trembling and cheeks flushed. You felt like your body was going to burst into flames, but you hid it, grinning slyly at her as you stepped forward.Â
Deep breath.Â
âHi, Ellie.â
Another step forward. She took two back, nearly pressed against the glass.Â
âY-You,â she stuttered as her eyes darted around nervously, and you could see her cheeks flushing in the darkness, âHowâd you get in here?âÂ
âI think you know how.âÂ
You shrugged, the contents of your bag shuffling on your back. You pointed towards the large, stretched windows behind her that oversaw the entire city, the hustling streets and lights beaming into the dimly lit room from the last bits of sunset.Â
âViewâs incredible,â your mockery littered in sarcasm. Donât let her know youâre scared.Â
She took a bold step forward as her brows furrowed, anger twisting on her doll-like face. You took two, as well. You saw her eyes dart to your feet before meeting your gaze to hiss at you.
âThereâre cameras on every floor of this fucking building! I press that button,â She darted her small knife towards the enclosed, red button on the side of the wall, a large print of EMERGENCIES ONLY directly above it. âAnd every cop in this cityâll show up and take your ass back to the fucking gutter where youâre supposed to be.âÂ
⊠How the fuck was she going to threaten you when she told you to come here?! What was she playing at?
She pointed her weapon back at you. You ignored your confusion and raised an impressed brow before walking forward without pause, pulling her motherâs chair out from under the desk, the wheels squeaking against the marbled tile. You saw the grip she had on her knife tighten.Â
You smiled at her. âYouâre pretty good with a knife, honey.âÂ
âFuck you. Donât fucking call me that.â
âI dunno,â you scoffed, twirling on your heels as you took in the luxurious space around you. âI can bet my bottom ass dollar that you like it.âÂ
Her glare hardened, and your smile brightened. You finally moved to sit in the chair, the plush leather molding against your body and stuffed backpack. You scooted back under the desk and rested your elbows on the hand-carved rosewood, completely calm. At least outwardly. Your insides were jittery from adrenaline.Â
You quickly inspected the contents of the desk: her motherâs matching rosewood nameplate, some loose paperwork with large sums of money scattered on them, dark pens and markers, and a signed restraining order. With your name on it.Â
Youâre apparently not allowed a hundred feet within the perimeter of the building.Â
⊠Funny.Â
âPress it.âÂ
Her scowl hardened, âWhat?âÂ
You pointed a lax finger towards the button as you looked up from the document, âI said press it. You want me gone so bad, right?âÂ
She didnât reply, her fingers fidgeting around the knife as she adjusted her grip. Her eyes nervously flitted across the room, all over the white floors, back on you.Â
âYouâre not gonna press the fucking button.â You spat with a devilish smile. âAnd I know why.âÂ
âFuck you, you donât know shâ â
âYou paid my bail.âÂ
You heard her release a shaky exhale when you sliced through her words, her eyes widening in shock like she saw through you, and you knew you had her. Your smile widened as your nails pattered where you tapped on the desk.Â
âUh huh. Whyâd you do it?âÂ
Her throat moved as she swallowed, and you almost laughed.Â
You reached into your jacket pocket and pulled out the piece of paper that kept you company in your small cot during your restless nights, unfolding it and holding up the explicit depiction that she left in your bag days ago. You pressed her as you swung the chair with your foot, âThink somebodyâs got a little crush. Mommyâs gonna be so upset with you.âÂ
âFUCK YOU!â She marched towards you until she was in front of the desk, her scent enclosing around you before you felt the incredibly sharp blade against the side of your neck, and you stiffened in terror. You looked at her in shock, studying her expression. She looked pissed, but you saw⊠something in her eyes that made your core squeeze tight.Â
It was vulgar, needy, and you hoped she missed your bodyâs excited shudder at her crude rage.Â
She didnât. Curiosity shone behind her lust and fiery, her enraged shrieks shook your eardrums.Â
âYouâre fucking worthless! You really think anyoneâs gonna care about you rotting in a fucking cell?! Youâre⊠youâre nothing! Youâre a low life! Youâre⊠youâre! ââ
You deadened your own eyes as you slowly moved to stand, but she pressed the knife deeper into your skin as she leaned over the desk, your faces closer together. You stiffened and felt a sting on your skin, and a drop of wetness. Your pussy squeezed, and you could feel sweat looking under your jacket.Â
âGonna kill me, Ellie?â You glared at her, your heart pounding with fear and exhilaration.Â
Say you want me. Say it, sayitsayitsayit!
Her eyes were vengeful as she scanned your face, but you saw that glint grow behind the harsh overcast. Something you craved just as badly as she did.Â
âReally want mommy to see her precious girl killing somebody on camera? Hm?âÂ
âShe,â her breath shuddered. âwouldnât give a fuck if it were you, I promise.âÂ
You barely whispered your reply as you leaned even closer, your nipples hardening under your sports bra and your underwear clinging to your wetness.Â
âThen do it.â
The heavy breaths she released hit your face in a burning wind, and your core tightened once more. You could see the aggression on her face slowly dissipate, that giddy sparkle in her eye overtaking her pupils as they darkened.Â
You felt the cold steel pull away from you slowly, her hand coming down on the desk, â unfortunateâ and it threw you into action.
Your hand flew up to her throat and squeezed the sides, and you heard the clatter of the object as it hit the wood. You heard her suck in a choked breath as her eyes glossed over, suddenly desperate and wanton and scared like youâd been seconds before. She looked like a neglected kitten, and it made you hold her neck in tighter constriction.Â
She whimpered aloud as she attempted to gasp, her hand coming up to grab your wrist, but you snatched it away with your free hand, and it limply dropped to the desk, her body submitting.Â
You leaned in closer to her, and her eyes squeezed shut, lips puckered, silently begging for you to kiss her. You snickered.Â
You let her neck go and slammed your palm across her blushing cheek, a loud crack! filling the room.Â
She cried aloud, looking like she was about to burst into tears as she jumped off the desk and backed away from you, her hand pressed against her searing cheek. You rose to your feet and circled around the desk, rushing towards her until she was pressed up against the window. Tears were running down her face. You shoved her closer against the glass, grabbing her cheeks to force her to look at you.Â
âYouâve been watching me, havenât you? I got a little fan, is that it?âÂ
âN-Noâ â
âYeah, I do. Fuckinâ stalker. Probably gotta whole shrine tâme in your fucking room. Does mommy know that you worship me? The lowlife who fucked up her building?â You snapped at her.
She flinched at your tone before she choked out a gasped sob, âI j-just liked what you m-made.â
âStop crying, Ellie.â
She nodded as she sniffled, wiping the tears off her cheeks. You grasp loosened on her cheeks as you cupped her face, your thumb brushing away the wetness on her already bruising skin. You noticed how she leaned into your caress. It made your heart jolt.
âLook at me,â you whispered.Â
She hesitantly met your eyes.Â
âYou wanna kiss me?â
She looked down at her shuffling feet, and you saw her fist clench.Â
âAnswer me.âÂ
âY-Yes, wanna kiss. Just⊠just one?â
You hummed in satisfaction, inching closer towards her like you did previously. She stiffened but shut her eyes tightly, her plush lips poking out in a pucker once more as your noses touched. You chuckled and whispered, your lips brushing against hers as you spoke.Â
âYou ever kissed anyone, baby?â
She sighed out an uneven nuh uh, her mouth chasing yours. You grinned wider.
âOh? Mâgonna be your first kiss?âÂ
She whined out a needy uh huuuh!Â
You stuck your tongue out, slowly running the wet muscle over her lower lip, and you felt her whole body tremble against yours. She brainlessly stuck her tongue out to lick yours, but you pulled back. She tried to follow you, but you yanked her head back by the small bun at the back of her head, the soft strands curling around your fist.Â
She let out a moan, and your tongue licked up her exposed throat, leaving a trail of spit up her chin, all the way to her mouth.Â
You relented and connected your mouths, and she let out a shocked noise into your mouth. You slipped your tongue in her gaping mouth, wet, smacking noises filling the room as you kissed her hotly. She couldnât keep up with your quick movements, her lips and tongue moving sloppily against yours. Her spit was all over the outside of your mouth.Â
You felt her hands come up to your hips to grip your jacket in a tight fist as she moaned into your mouth.Â
The noises she let out were so sweet: little, excited gasps and whiny keens as she tried to pull you closer.Â
You released her hair and grabbed her chin to move her head to the side. You kissed down her neck, and she jerked against you. Her breaths increased in pace as you pecked her sweaty skin, lapping your tongue all over the side.
You sucked into the skin under her ear, right under her jaw, pulling her sweater down to mark her collarbone.Â
âPleeease, pleaseplease, ahâ â
You mumbled in between gentle sucks, âWhat, Ellie? Talk.âÂ
You felt her hands grab your hips tighter, but she said nothing. You pushed her hands off you roughly and looked at her with piercing eyes. She shrunk into herself when she met them.Â
âWhen I tell you to do something, you do it. You understand?âÂ
She nodded quickly.Â
âSo fucking talk,â you gritted out.Â
âWant,â she whispered with a sharp gasp. âWant you.âÂ
You smirked, âYou want me?â
âMmhm!â
You shoved your backpack off your shoulders, the thud echoing when it hit the floor.Â
âWant me to do what?â
She paused before looking down at her feet again, twiddling and picking at her fingers as her face burned red.Â
âUmâŠâÂ
You rolled your eyes and turned away from her, but you felt her hand grab your wrist and you stopped. You looked at her in annoyance.Â
She looked at you tentatively, her breathing shaky.Â
But then she slowly brought your hand in between her legs.Â
She shivered as she placed her hand on top of yours, making you rub her cunt back and forth. She released pleased sighs as her lashes fluttered, her head falling back against the window as she looked at you up and down.Â
âP-Please?â She licked her lips. âWanâyou here.â
You scoffed in shock, and her thighs squeezed down on both your hands. You pressed your palm closer against her, and her hips bucked into you.Â
You moved closer to her, your clothed chests pressed together.Â
âMove your hand,â you spoke quietly, just for her to hear even though you were alone.
She dropped it limply. You pressed your palm into her covered clit, and she moaned.Â
You leaned in, your lips brushing her cheek as you spoke.
âBaby just wanted her pussy touched? Thatâs why you acted out earlier?â
She didnât speak as she panted heavily. You brought your hand up to slap her cheek again, and she released a pained cry as her hips twitched.Â
âTalk!â
âYes! Needa⊠need tâbe touched!â
âTell me where.â You brought your hand back down to her pussy as fresh tears slid down her cheeks.Â
She sobbed. âA-Anywhere!â
You leered at her soft face. âYeah? I get tâchoose?âÂ
She nodded quickly, her eyes screaming touch me, please! Make me cum!
âOpen your mouth, honey. Stick your tongue out.â
She mewled softly, but did what you asked, her shiny, pink muscle glistening under the beaming city lights.Â
You brought your hand up, rubbing your index and middle finger on her soft tongue.Â
âGet âem wet.â
She hummed as she sucked them into her mouth with no hesitation. You felt her tongue messily swirl around your digits as she sighed contently, and you pressed an encouraging peck on her cheek.Â
You slowly fucked your fingers in, pulling them out, only to push them back in again. You almost awwed aloud when she chased your digits every time you pulled out. She was already drooling for them.Â
You pressed her tongue down as you fucked in, and she gagged on them. Her eyes shot open and they instantly watered, her throat tightening around you.Â
âBet you suck a mean dick,â you muttered before you could stop yourself.Â
She moaned loudly as you fucked deeper into her mouth, pressing down on the back of her tongue.Â
âOh, yeah? Want mine down that pretty throat?â
She garbled and nodded as much as she could with your fast thrusts in her mouth. You couldnât wait to fuck it open.Â
âSnooped through my shit, didnât you? Saw my fucking cock and creamed yourself? Thatâs why you bought me new shit?â
You saw her bring a hand down to touch her pussy, her hips bucking into her own hand, chasing any stimulation. You grabbed her wrist and pulled it away from her.Â
You finally eased up on her throat and pulled out completely, lines of slobber connecting your fingers and her mouth together. You cut them with your own tongue, her spit clinging to the edges of your mouth.Â
You planted a smacking kiss on her lips before you shoved your hand down her dark, flared pants and into her boxers.Â
She squealed when you immediately found her clit with your spit covered fingers, the slippery bud sliding between your already drippy fingers. You watched her hand fly to the white windowsill for balance as your hand went wild on her cunt.Â
âSuch a wet fucking pussy. Feels good, baby?â
Her brows creased as she nodded, her body rocking with your movements. âA-Ah! ââÂ
âUh huh. You touch yourself like this when mommyâs at work? Hm?â
Her head shamefully jerked in confirmation. You could see her now: her pretty legs spread on her plush bed, her sopping pussy squeezing at the thought of you fucking her just how she needed. Sheâd be grabbing at her tits as she flicked her clit, desperate to cum all over her blankets for you. Your pussy was so wet.Â
âYou think about me when you do it?â You knew the answer, but you needed her to say it. Confirm that she thought about you just as much as you thought about her.Â
âYes! Yes, yes!â
âFucking whore, no wonder she hates your guts.â
She moaned louder at your degradation. âSâcâcoming! â
Your fingers were practically vibrating on her cunt, her clit thumping as her orgasm built. âGet my fingers niceân sloppy, angel, câmonâ â
She reached down to grab your wrist as she jumped on your fingers, but before you could slap her, her body tensed, and her eyes rolled into her skull. You felt her clit pulsate under your touch, and you knew she was cumming.
âFuckmemommy!â
You couldnât stop the shock that appeared on your face as you watched her thrash on your hand, gasping out, asking you to please fuck me, mommy! Need you to fuck me!
You just massaged her through it, pressing your hips up against hers so she couldnât run from your touch.Â
âWanâmommy to fuck you, angel?â you mumbled in your daze as your pussy dripped, your brain barely registering what you just said.
âYespleasepleaseplease, gimmeâ â
âFuck, baby, need mommy inside you?â Your heart was pounding in your ears.Â
âM-Mhhm!ââ
âGimme your leg,â You lifted it up with your free hand, bringing it up so it came around your waist.
You slid your fingers down to her twitchy entrance and slipped the tip of your pointer finger inside. You almost moaned at how her walls clung to you, sucking you in deeper, milking you.
âTightest fuckinâ pussy,â you mumbled to her, and she whimpered when your finger arched inside her. You prodded around until she slumped against you, pushing her hips down on your finger. You leaned in, your lips brushing her ear as you cooed right there? yeah? feels fuckinâ good?
She couldnât even speak. She just plopped her head onto your shoulder and sloppily kissed your neck. Your cunt clenched and you flinched when her soft tongue licked into the small slit she made earlier. You heard her hum as her tongue swiped a line from your collarbone to your cut; She was licking your blood up like a fucking dog!
It made you punch that spot in her harder, and she cried out against your skin, her nails digging into your forearm.Â
You slowly pushed your middle finger in, and she sobbed as she stretched around you. You arched your thumb out to rub her clit as you poked that spongy spot in her pussy; She was so loud for you.Â
âLike when I touch you there?âÂ
âI like it, like it sâmuch!â You felt her nodding mindlessly against you.
âGonna cum on me again?â you spat at her.Â
âFuck yes!âÂ
âKnow youâre gonna cum hard, canât even fuck you like I wanna, squeezing me so tight.â
You dug your fingers as deep and fast into her as her cunt would allow. Her walls were choking the fuck out of you, practically screaming for them to stay where you were pressed inside her. How the fuck was she going to take you fully?!
The thought of breaking her open made you shake, âGonna make this pussy take me. Canât wait tâgive you this fucking dick.â
Then she started screaming out for you, trying to get you closer, wrapping her arms around you, her leg dropping onto the floor. âOhgodohgodohgod, mâcumming, mommy, IâmcuâAH!â
You almost fell back when she went limp on you, her knees buckling as her slick coated your fingers, your palm, her panties. You used your weight to push her back against the window, her head thudding against the glass like before, but she seemed too engulfed in her desire to care. You almost brought your hand up to comfort her sore spot, anyway, but you stopped yourself.Â
You took her in: practically dangling off you as she wailed from orgasm, her face beat red, the bun at the back of her head almost loose, her eyelids fluttering. You sneered at her, a nasty grin on your face.Â
âAtta girl, so excited for cock, ainât she?â
She could only grind out yesyesyes between her teeth, her fingers still squeezing down on you as you rubbed her clit, her orgasm slowing down.Â
âYou gotta make me cum first, mâkay?âÂ
âWâna make⊠mommy cum!â she nodded like a bobblehead as she slurred.Â
âYeah? Want mommyâs cum in your mouth?â
She wept desperately, âYes, please, need it!â
You grinned, catching a glimpse of your desperate reflection in the mirror. Youâre so glad she was too fucked out to notice.
âCâmon, honey.âÂ
Ellie stood in front of you as you sat in her motherâs chair, her shoes kicked off.Â
Your bag was tossed next to you as you stared at her, noting her fidgeting stance. She wasnât looking at you, at all. She was looking down, specifically at your occupied hands.Â
Youâd picked up her discarded knife from the table, inspecting its rusty, scratched design, slightly bloody blade, retraction. You couldnât stop fiddling with it.Â
âW-Whatâre gonna do with that?â You heard her ask.Â
You ignored it. âWhereâd you get it?â
âIt was my dadâs.â Her voice went sharp.Â
âWhat kinda father lets his baby play with such sharp objects?â You said in between sarcastic snickers.Â
âHeâs fucking dead, who cares.âÂ
You finally looked up at her sharp tone, examining her tense face, and your playful smile slowly dropped. She tried to appear as if mentioning it didnât bother her, but you recognized that look in her eye from anywhere. Grief fucking sucks, no matter how much time passed.
â⊠Hm.âÂ
You looked down at the blade again, then back up at her, âHe taught you how to⊠handle it?âÂ
She shrugged, her brows raising as her arms crossed over her chest. You nodded.Â
Your arm was suddenly incredibly itchy. âMine taught me how to⊠draw nâstuff.âÂ
You looked off to the side awkwardly as you reminisced on the first pack of colored pencils heâd bought you. You remembered how particular he was about the art utensils and their conditions. You didnât realize that he was trying to ensure their quality because he couldnât afford another pack until you got older.
Always make sure these bastards are sharpened! Thatâs true precision!
â⊠Cool,â you heard her say, and you looked at her, âWere you guys, uh, close?âÂ
âMhm,â You nodded stiffly, and silence surrounded the two of you. Ellie awkwardly nodded as she stared at the floor, and your lips twitched before you turned to stare out the window.
Some time passed in pure silence before you heard her speak.Â
â⊠Still wanna, uh⊠Dâyou still wanna fuck?âÂ
You looked at her as she fumblingly scratched the back of her head. Her eyes met yours as her ears burned. You grinned as your shoulders rose.
âUp to you.âÂ
âLike⊠I still wanna if you do,â She nibbled on her bottom lip.Â
You leaned back in her momâs seat.Â
âEllie.âÂ
The deep tone of your voice made her look up, her eyes shining like crystals as her arms dropped to her sides.Â
âYes?âÂ
â⊠Câmere.âÂ
She moved, her sock-covered feet padding on the floor until she was in front of you.Â
You looked up at her, your hand coming up to play with the hem of her sweater.Â
You spoke softly, âOff. Câmon.âÂ
She grabbed the back of her top and lifted it over her head, her bare chest jiggling with her movements. She tossed the fabric to the floor.Â
You eyed her chest like you were going to swallow her whole, her perky nipples urging you to reach out and pull on them. Her pussy is so fucking sensitive; Were her nipples just as bad? Worse? Could she cum just from you touching them? Fuck, she probably couldâ
âAre they⊠Do you like them?âÂ
Her soft whisper cut through your gawking. You met her eyes through your lashes as she squirmed in front of you.Â
Your hands came up to grab her hips, massaging them gently.Â
âYeah, baby. Theyâre so pretty, fit you perfectly.âÂ
She sighed in content, âT-Thank you.âÂ
You planted a soft kiss to her tummy as you looked at your thumb around the elastic of her pants to pull them down.Â
Her stomach jerked with every sharp breath as your lips moved on her bare skin. You felt her hand come up to your shoulder to grasp it as she stepped out of her pants.Â
Your hands traveled upward to grab both her tits in a rough squeeze. She wheezed and arched her back so you could get closer. You heard her murmur a quiet fuckme, and you looked up. She was watching your every move with wide, curious eyes. You held her gaze as you licked up her torso, and she whimpered.Â
You brought your hands back down to grab the back of her thighs, moving her closer to your lap. She placed her hands on your shoulders as she climbed on top of you, and you sucked her nipple into your mouth.Â
She grinded down onto you and moaned, and your eyes fluttered shut. Your tongue made circular movements on the pert bud, and you hummed at the taste of her soft skin. Her head fell forward as she gasped right in your ear, and it made you suck on her hard.Â
Her hips were jerking on top of you, trying to fuck down onto your clothed thigh as her nails plunged into your back.Â
âFeels so⊠mmh!â
You brought your hand back up to her other tit and played with her nipple with your fingers.Â
And then you slapped it. Hard.Â
She let out a sharp squeak and mindlessly bounced on top of your leg; You could feel a slight dampness building on your jeans, and you scoffed at her, sneering when you pulled away. You hit her other tit just as hard, your spit transferring onto your palm.Â
âAh! Fuckfuckfuâ â
Smack!
âYes!â
SMACK!
She squealed. âMâgonna cum!â
You reached up to slap her face before pulling her hair to the side with a tight fist.Â
You quickly grabbed her switchblade off the desk and unlatched the blade, the sharp edge popping up. You instantly pressed it to her neck, and she choked on a ragged pant.Â
The lust in her eyes was accompanied by fear, and you grinned.Â
âDonât get scared now. You were waving it around earlier. So ready to fight, huh?âÂ
She shuddered, rutting down on your leg again, and you pressed the sharp edge into her skin harder. Her eyes shut tight, and two fat tears fell down her cheeks. She nearly bounced on you.Â
âI could fuck you up right here, you know that, right?âÂ
âPlease, mommy, needa cuâ!â
You moved the knife away and released her hair, slapping her in the face again. âShut the fuck up, you nearly slit my fuckinâ throat and now you wanna fuck. I should leave right now, fucking brat.â
She sobbed, âNonono, please donât leave, mommy donât go, mâsorryIâmâ â
âMommy, donât go!â you mocked. âGet on your fuckinâ knees.âÂ
You kept the blade pressed against her jugular as she clumsily shuffled to the floor, her cries shaking her body.Â
âYou wanna apologize?â She nodded jerkily, minding the silver edge on her vein.
âYeah? Wanna make mommy feel better?â You said with a mean pout.Â
âMhm!â
You sloppily kicked your boots off and shoved them under the desk.Â
âTake mâpants off, baby. Câmon.â
She moved quickly, unbuttoning and tugging your jeans and underwear down your legs as she sniffled. She yanked them off with a hard tug, and her eagerness made you giggle as you lifted your hips. You unzipped your jacket and pulled it off your shoulders, tossing it to the floor, leaving you in your black tank top. You couldâve sworn you saw a glimpse of a grin on her face as she eyed your breasts before she dived towards your cunt.Â
You shoved the knife closer against her, and you saw blood pool at the edge of the blade. She looked up at you with an anxious expression.Â
âI didnât say you could touch me. Ask nicely.âÂ
She looked confused as she mumbled brokenly, âAsk you what?â
Your brows furrowed at her, âMy mistake. You probably never had to ask for shit in your life.âÂ
Her bruised cheeks glowed red as she looked down in embarrassment.Â
You grinned slyly. âSay, mommy, may I eat your pussy, please?âÂ
Shock overtook her expression before she rolled her eyes at you and looked to the side.
âYouâre fucking craâ â
You yanked her dark hair back and pointed the end of the blade against her bruised jaw. Her ragged breaths hit your face.
âSay it.âÂ
âY-You're not gonna hurt me,â she stated unsteadily.Â
âYou donât know shit about me, and even if I did hurt you, youâd want it. Admit it.âÂ
She avoided your gaze and her lips quivered.Â
You continued. âYouâd let me do anything I want because youâre disgusting. A filthy fucking slut with a silver spoon in her mouth.â
You huffed at her with a frown. âAnd you like girls. Youâd be just as worthless as I am in her eyes if she found out.âÂ
You nodded over to her motherâs nameplate, and her eyes shut like she was a child getting scolded for stealing candy at the store.Â
âIâm right, baby? You donât want a husband? Donât wanna get bred for the empire like she wants?â
She shamefully shook her head as tears fell down her face. You didnât even know if she was in that circumstance or not, but by her reaction, it seemed to cut her deep. You ignored the searing pain in your chest.
âMhm, so,â you turned her head so she could look at you, her red eyes burning through yours. âSomething you wanna ask me?âÂ
Her mouth dropped open in submission.
âM-Mommy, may I⊠May I eat your pussy, please?âÂ
You smiled in satisfaction, placing a gentle kiss on her wet forehead.Â
âYes, baby, you may.âÂ
You pulled the knife away from her and set it on the desk, grabbing her chin to plant a kiss to her mouth. She whined happily into yours.Â
You pulled back and adjusted your position, leaning back with your legs spread, the underside of your knees hooked into the armrests of the seat, your cunt on full display for her. Your sopping pussy was right next to her face, and you saw her eyes flutter in delight.Â
âWant me tâshow you how?âÂ
She nodded intensely.Â
You brushed away the flyaway hairs on her forehead, your hand planted on the back of her head.Â
âSpit on my clit, babe. Get it nice nâwet.âÂ
She released a glob of spit right onto your pulsing bud,
and you sighed as it dribbled down to your hole. You tilted her head back, remnants of slobber collecting on her chin. You gathered spit in your mouth and pulled her lower lip down, her mouth falling open. You spat onto her tongue, and she moaned, tilting her head down to spit it out all over your pussy. You bit your lip so hard; you almost drew blood.
You reached down and spread your lips, your throbbing clit poking through. You could see her trembling as she eyed you.Â
âWanna taste, Ellie?â
âYeah, please, mommy,â she choked out.Â
âLick me, then, honey.âÂ
She wasted no time, the tip of her tongue circling around the nub instantly. Your mouth fell open at the sensation. The pink muscle was so soft, the licks slow and gentle, barely there.Â
âDoing so good, baby, take your time,â you sighed out.Â
She keened at your praise; her lashes flitted like butterfly wings in Spring as she rubbed your clit in deep licks.Â
âFuck, Ellie, sâso sensitive,â she whined against you, eyes begging for your approval as she watched your expression. You caressed her burning cheek with your pointer finger, and she licked deeper.
âFuck, baby, thatâs it, making me so happy,â her eyes rolled shut as she tongued you, sliding her tongue all over your pussy in slow strokes.Â
You moaned out every time she came up to lap at your clit. You guided her head down to your hole, and her tongue slipped inside, slurping up all your slick. You were gasping her name out as her tongue wiggled inside you, swirling all over your walls.Â
âSuch a good girl, fuck, El!â you groaned out as wet sounds filled the room. âWanna make mommy cum?â
She hummed excitedly and nodded, her tongue moving back up to massage your clit. You tightened her grip on her head, forcing it to move back and forth her hums shaking your clit.Â
She moved her head faster against you when she sucked your clit into her mouth, and your head fell back against the chair as your eyes rolled back. Your thighs were shaking, toes curled as you squealed out encouragement. You needed to cum, she was going to make you cum!
âGet me there, pretty, mââ gonna make me fuckinâ cumâ â
âWanâmommyâs cum, please?â she sloppily murmured against you.Â
âGonna get it, baby, mâright there! ââ
She was fully moaning all over your clit, âGonna fuck you so good, angel, fuck yes!â
You peeled your eyes open and looked back down at her when she released your clit to moan aloud. Her drool and your pussy juice were all over her pink lips as she sighed and whimpered in pleasure. You couldnât see what she was doing, but her forearm was moving frantically as quiet shhlcks filled the room.Â
âEllie.â
âMommymâgonnacumâ â
âI swear to gâ â
âSâso wet, oh god, please!âÂ
SMACK!
Her head flew onto your thigh at your hard slap to her face, and she screamed out as her body tensed up. You watched her with a scowl as she squealed out mâcummimgsohardmommy against your skin, a puddle of drool forming on your skin.Â
You yanked her hand out of her boxers, and she whined in protest as her orgasmed died, her hips bucking back into the air. You stood up, pulling her up by her waist and bending her over the desk, holding her down by her neck.Â
âStop fucking with me, Ellie.â You pulled her boxers down under her ass, taking in the sight of her still pulsating cunt and her twitchy ass.Â
She spat at you over her shoulder, âOr whaâ â
SMACK!
She groaned out in pain against the wood when your hand connected with her asscheek in a fiery slap, your hand burning.Â
âMotherfucâ â
SMACK!Â
You hit her and hit her. And hit her again. And again. Until she was jerking away from you, her hips bucking against the desk and your handprints covering her ass in a cherry-red tint.Â
You donât even remember how many times you slapped her, but she was sobbing out apologies against the desk, asking for your forgiveness over her tears.
âYou done fucking around?â Your hand felt like it was in flames when you dropped it on the desk.
âYesyes, mommy, I wonâtâsobâ wonât fuck up again!âÂ
âI was actually gonna eat your pussy out,â you scoffed out nastily, and she only cried harder at the insinuation that you werenât anymore. âYou donât want that, you donât want me fucking nice.âÂ
You pulled away and walked towards your discarded
bag on the floor, digging through it and pulling your dick out, stepping into and adjusting the straps as you watched her bruised ass jiggle with each wail.Â
Your dick stood up as you walked back over to her. You gave her one last hard slap on her marked ass and pulled her up by her arm, shoving her onto her knees in front of you so she was trapped between you and the desk.Â
You could see her wiping away tears, but you grabbed her chin, forcing her to look up at you.Â
âYou want dick so bad? Get it wet so I can fuck you.âÂ
Shock appeared on her face.
âY-Youâre gonna fuck me with that?â You watched her inspect the size of you. The length, the girth, all the ridges. Her breathing got heavier the longer she stared.
âNow youâre fucking scared, really, Ellie?â
âIâm not scaâ â
âTalk back again, and Iâm leaving. Youâre getting on my fucking nerves.âÂ
She glared at you, but looked down, straight at your tip, then back at you.Â
And then she spit on it, a fat glob of saliva dribbling down the sides of your cock. Her hand came up to wrap around the base, rubbing her spit into the silicone. She held eye contact with you as she stuck her tongue out. You reached down and placed your hand on top of hers, slapping your tip on her slobbery muscle.Â
âGood fucking whore, good nâsloppy,â you let go to pat her still-red cheek with a heavy hand, and her pretty eyes hardened, her blush deepening. She dropped her mouth open, her lips curling on the tip as she sucked on it. You bit your lip as you watched her tongue swirl around you.
She moaned around the silicone, her eyes filthy. Her hand spread her spit up all over you as she took in your inches slowly, jerking you off and slobbering on you at the same time. She looked like a fucking pornstar, like she practiced for this, like she wanted to impress you, and you shook like you could actually feel her mouth. Your pussy was desperate to cum, but you pushed it aside and watched her.Â
She released you with a wet pop, her tongue flicking around your tip like she was lapping at your cum, and you couldnât stop the moan that left your mouth.Â
âNasty slut, goddamnâ â
She smiled like you just called her the prettiest girl in the world before sucking you back in, her head bobbing up and down as she slurped you up. There was so much spit on your length that it started dripping onto the floor.
You bucked forward, your hips moving on autopilot, and she choked on you, her hand coming up to your thigh to squeeze it. You ignored her grasp and fucked into her mouth harder, pinning both her arms above her head on the desk. She gargled around your dick, and you could only imagine the tightness of her throat with each gag.Â
âWhat, baby? Donât like it? Want me tâstop?â You gritted out. And you thrusted deeper. She moaned and her mouth opened wider.
She was making wet noises around you, her head thudding against the top drawer of the desk when you fucked in. You fucked your entire cock down her throat, and she gagged hard.Â
You pulled out and let her go.
She fell forward and coughed hard, her drool pooling down on the eggshell floors as she choked. You watched in irritation as she heaved.
âGet up,â her gasps slowed as she breathed in deeply, and she lifted her head to glare at you from her hunched position.Â
âGet up.âÂ
âFuck you,â she spluttered.
âIâm gonna. Get up.â
Despite her bitterness, she slowly stood and instantly bent over the desk with her scarred ass poked out towards you. You chuckled when you saw both her holes pulse in excitement.
âThatâs how it is?â you slapped her asscheek, and her hips bucked back against your hand.Â
âUh huh,â you heard her crackly mumble dazedly. âNeed you tâmake me cum.â
âSeemed alright doing it yourself a few minutes ago.â
She ignored you, and you smirked, âNeed your cock, mommy, pleeease, pleaseâ â
You reached out, running two fingers over her drenched slit, and she pressed back on them as she sighed in pleasure. You slowly slid your fingers down to her clit, and she moaned aloud, her thighs jerking.Â
âLook at this fucking pussy, jesus.âÂ
âI-Itâs pretty?â
âYeah, baby, fuck,â your mouth watered when you saw her walls clench. âCanât even be mad, youâre so fucking hot.â
âThen fuck me,â she whined out sweetly, looking at you over her shoulder.Â
You leaned down until you were eye level with her pussy, her walls squelching and squeezing repeatedly. You bit your lip and kitty-licked her cunt, her slick painting your taste buds as her smell surrounded you, and she jumped at the feeling.Â
âTaste like fucking honey.âÂ
âSo do you, made me so wet,â she exhaled as she shivered in anticipation.Â
âSâgonna hurt,â you whispered, more to yourself as you eyed her tightness.Â
âDonât care.â She pushed back on your face.
âPut your hands behind your back. Donât move them.âÂ
She shuddered and obeyed instantly, her hands overlapping at the wrists at the small of her back.Â
You pressed one last kiss to her pussy before standing upright, âYou move your hands, I stop.â
âNot gonna move, mommy,â she whispered in between unsteady breaths. âMake me feel good, please. Please, please.â
âShh. Got you, baby. Open your legs,â you caressed her back and she squirmed. You felt goosebumps rise all over her skin, and you smirked.
The gap between her thighs widened even more for you, her cunt on full display. You could hear her beckoning you to pop the tip inside her in tiny, desperate whispers, and it made your core clench.Â
You inched closer to her until the back of her thighs pressed against the front of yours. You wrapped a hand around your wet dick and brought it up to her slit, soaking it in her gooey slick and sliding it between her silky lips. Her cunt was already soaking your entire length and you didnât even fuck her yet. She was subtly pushing back on you, trying to get you inside her.Â
You heard the enthusiasm in her voice when she keened, âMommy, please, itâs right there!â
âMhm, I know, I see it,â you mumbled wetly, her gooey cunt looked so pretty under the light of the city, shining like glitter.
âMaking mommy so wet baby, such a pretty girl,â you brought your cock back up to her slit and pushed forward, slowly popping the tip in her snug opening. She squealed loudly, and you saw her fists clench at the end of her spine as her walls clung to you, pulling you in.
âYesyesyes, oh god, mommy, fuck, uh huh!â
âYeah, baby? It hurts?âÂ
âNooo, feels sâgood, oh shit! ââ
You slowly pushed in another inch, gauging her reaction for any discomfort, your thumb moving on her hip softly. She tried to push back to take you deeper, but you held her hips down.
âFuck mefuckmefuckmeâ â
âGonna be my good girl, baby? Gonna take it niceân deep?âÂ
âYeah, mommy!â
You pushed in even deeper, and you could feel the resistance of her cunt the more you slid in. You couldnât stop the moan you released when she said your name.Â
âY-Youâre splitting me open, ffuckâ â
You pressed in the last bit of your dick, her ass resting at the top of your thighs, your hands propping you up on the desk as you leaned above her, placed on either side of her head. She was sighing heavily in satisfaction, and you could see her glossy eyes rolling.Â
âFeelinâ good?â
She nodded slowly, âU-Use me, mommy, please use me tâcum, fuck.â
âGotta take care of my girl first,â you fucked out of her slowly before snapping your hips, fucking all your inches back into her, and she screamed. âSuch a tight pussy.â
You bent down to kiss her pretty back, down her spine as you stroked her deeply. Youâd barely completed your fourth stroke before you felt Ellie tense up under you, her body shuddering as she moaned quietly to herself. You snickered at her.Â
âBabyâs cumming?â you licked up her spine again.Â
You could only see her nod in jerky headshakes from where you stood, her cheek pressed against the desk. You looked down at where you were connected, and you could see how her walls struggled to choke your dick. You grabbed her wrists in one hand and fucked her through her orgasm, your free hand sneaking under her hips to rub her clit.Â
The second her body relaxed, you saw the muscles in her back flex again, the arch in her back deepening, âMommy, thinkâmâcumming again, oh god, motherfuâ â
âHow many are you gonna give me, angel?â you rubbed her clit faster, fucking in harder.Â
âI feel it, I feel it, fuck!â She wasnât listening to anything you were saying as she yelled in her pleasure. You could see how much she was wetting your cock, lines of her slick forming every time you pulled out of her. You angled your hips downward when you fucked back in, and she shouted your name out, her warnings of her orgasm echoing in your ears. You released her clit and pinned her down by her neck again.Â
âLike it right there, baby? Thatâs the spot?â You could feel your core squeezing with every cry she let out, her voice completely broken, her squeals scratchy.Â
She was babbling about something, but you werenât listening, the squelchy sounds of her cunt increasing in volumes as you forced your dick in her, stirring her guts up.Â
You looked down and saw her ass squeezing with every quiver of her cunt, and you licked your lips. You let her wrists go and brought a hand to your mouth, sucking your thumb in to wet it before rubbing her ass with it.Â
She let out a loud slew of ah ah ahs before you felt a burst of wetness on your thighs, dripping down onto the floor. Her entire body was jerking back onto your, her rosy ass jiggling every time she hit your hips.Â
But then you heard a slam above her shouts of pleasure and mommy!
You looked up to check on her unsteady form as she continued to drench your lap, her hand resting on the back of her motherâs nameplate, her fingertips digging into the wood as she screamed in her euphoria.Â
It made you fuck her harder and pull her hand away from the dog tag. You didnât even care about punishing her anymore, you needed to cum. Youâd been riding that edge since you got here, and you knew you were going to cum so hard.
You leaned over her body and grinded into her, moving her hand away from the plate and sitting back up in its position. You grabbed her by her spit-coated chin so she could look dead at her motherâs name. She whimpered and tried to look away from it, but you tightened the grip on her face to keep her still.Â
âLook at it, babyâ â
She sobbed, murmuring how hard she was about to cum again, her eyes fluttering as she stared at it, her cheeks glowing like apples.
You bent down to her ear, âYou embarrassed, angel? Huh? Wanna close your eyes? Gonna squirt on me again?â
She was looking dead at the plate, âYouâre so deep, mommy, fuck yes, mâgonna!ââ
âNasty fucking slut, taking it so good,â You looked up at the clear window as your thrusts picked up pace again, the entire city shining through the glass in all its glory. Every light of every building, people roaming, honking, noises of construction. It was all beneath you, and it was all theirs. The strap was bumping on your clit with each thrust.Â
âLook at your city, baby,â you lifted her weightless head by her wild, knotted hair and made her look into the distance as you groaned in pleasure. âGonna be all yours one day, can do whatever you want with it soon.â
âFuuuckâ â
âUh huh, you like having that power? You can get whatever the fuck you wantâ â
âM-Mommy!â
âJust need a baby, right? Gonna g-give her what she wants? Gonna give her that precious heir, that golden child?â
âYesyesyes! Wanâyour baby, geâme fucking pregnant!â
You moaned at her begging as you babbled mindlessly to her, âGonna cum in you, fuck, need it⊠tâcatchâ â
She was screaming about how your seed was going to catch in her womb, how hard she was going to squirt again, begging you to fuck her harder, hurt her, make her bleed, make her scream. You could feel your senses leaving as your orgasm built as she pushed back on you, and you moaned her name in her ear.Â
âFuuuck, Ellie,â your clit jerked, and you let her go, her head falling onto her arm in front of her as she yelled in euphoria. âGonna make that bitch raise my fuckinâ kid while Iâm gone? Huh?â
She didnât even react to your slip of your departure, âYeahyesyesyes! Fuck, Iâm cumming!â
You felt another spray of liquid drip down your legs as you drilled her, and it triggered your own orgasm. Your clit jerked as your release rushed through you, your walls clenching as your body shook on top of hers, grinding against her to ride it out. You could almost feel the sensation of filling her up, her cunt sucking your cum deep inside her.Â
She was still moaning above you, wringing the last bits of her orgasm out on your cock. You whined against her sweaty skin, the aftershocks moving through you.Â
You felt her go completely lax underneath you, heavy sighs leaving her parted lips.Â
You both caught your breaths in soothing silence.Â
After Ellie asked you to show her how to kiss properly, the pounding of your heart refused to slow down.Â
You were seated in her motherâs chair once more, her wetness still coating you in stickiness as she straddled your lap, her arms around your neck as she gazed at you nervously.
âWe just fucked, why do you look like that?â
Her brows creased, âLike what?â
âLike youâre scared.â
âIâm not scared,â she whispered, her eyes flickering down to your lips before looking back up at you.Â
You only hummed at her, brushing your noses together before leaning forward, grabbing the back of her neck to pull her down to you. Her eyes shut tightly, and her lips puckered in front of yours, and you pulled back, grabbing her face to stop her.
âStop doing that, just relax.âÂ
â⊠Whatâd I do?â
You mimicked her, poking your lips out stiffly before breaking out into a grin. She huffed with a tiny smile, shaking her head, âSorry.â
You shrugged, uncaring. She looked down, âWhere do I put my tongue?âÂ
You snorted, âNowhere yet.â
You craned your neck up slowly and connected your mouth with hers gently, your lips molding against hers. She sighed and leaned closer into you, her arms tightening around the back of your neck. You felt a sharp sting in your chest at her delicate touch, and you pulled away. A soft smack filled the room when you separated. She smiled softly, âThat was cute.âÂ
You nodded stiffly, murmuring a mhm, before looking down. Out the window. Behind her. Anywhere but her eyes.Â
You felt her nuzzle against your cheek, kissing it gently, âAre we⊠uh, fucking again?âÂ
âYou want to?â The pounding in your ears was giving you a headache.Â
You felt her nod. Another kiss to your cheek. Another pull in your heart.Â
Your hands planted on her hips, lifting them so she could sit on you, but she grabbed your wrists to stop you.Â
Her hands latched onto the hem of your shirt, attempting to pull it up and over your head, but your hand caught her wrist. Not harshly, but stern.
Her eyes softened at your masked expression, releasing the gentle grip on your shirt, âIâm, uh⊠Iâm sorrâ â
âItâs fine. Ready?â you grabbed the base of your dick in your hand, and she mumbled a quiet yes.Â
You felt her hand come on top of yours as she helped you guide it to her entrance, and your breath shook as you exhaled.
Her hips came down on you at her own pace, your free hand resting on her hip. She gasped when it slipped inside, her hands coming to support herself on each armrest.Â
âFeels different like this,â she whispered huskily.
You smirked, âI know, take your time.âÂ
She nodded, slowly sinking down on you. You saw her eyelids get heavy as her walls caught on every ridge of you, her head falling back in her pleasure. Her soft locks disheveled all over her head, her bun nonexistent as her bobby pins stuck out from every direction.Â
She slid in too deep, though. She let out a pained gasp as she caught herself on the chair, her brows furrowing.Â
âOkay?â you checked in.
She nodded, her lip in between her teeth, âSo deep like this, fuck⊠donât know if I can go all the way down.â
âItâs fine, babe, make yourself feel good.âÂ
âH-Help me?â her breathing was picking up as her hips bucked.Â
Your other hand flew to her hips, digging into her soft skin as you guided her hips on you. You eased her into a deep grind, and her hands flew behind you, landing on the headrest behind you.Â
Her head rested in the crook of your neck as she followed your movements, her wet moans hitting the side of your neck. The sensation of her breath on your skin made your pussy clench.Â
âAm Iâgaspâdoing good, m-mommy?âÂ
âFucking me so good, baby, shit,â you whispered in her ear, and she moaned aloud in yours. She sped up on you, the harness digging into your clit with each swivel of her hips.Â
Your hands moved down to grab her ass, spreading her cheeks before slapping them, grabbing the plush of them in your hands. She fucked you harder, and you felt her spit drip on your neck as she wailed into your skin. You threw your head back on the headrest when she sucked on your neck, right on your open scar.
She lifted her head up and looked at you with gentle eyes, her hands moving down from the headrest to grab your cheeks in a soft touch. She was panting on your mouth, her lips brushing against yours with every jump on you. She was so close and she smelled so good, her lips soft.Â
She whispered dreamily, âCanât stop cummingâ â
Your eyelids fluttered, âThen donât. Give it to me, mâso closeâ â
She grinded harder as she leaned down to connect your lips in a honey-sweet kiss. You reciprocated against your brain's desires.Â
Push her away. Sheâll never be yours! This is all she wants from you!
Tears built in your eyes as your peak approached, her moans increasing in urgency against your mouth. You sucked on her bottom lip, biting it hard. This is the most eager youâve felt since you touched her.Â
âCum with me, pleasepleasepleaseâ â
âIâm gonna, baby, fuck me hard!â
She was going crazy on your dick, full-on bouncing on you, taking it all despite her protests earlier, and you felt yourself tipping. Your pussy squeezed and soaked the harness as your orgasm pulled in your gut. You looked down at your cock, and it was drenched in her white, sticky substance. She was creaming all over your cock as she used you. It made your eyes cross in your skull as your euphoria hit you.Â
You were so loud as your nails tore into her skin, your moans matching hers in volume. You felt another splash of fluid on you, and you came harder, another wave crashing through you. You wouldâve curled in on yourself if she wasnât on top of you.Â
You felt her tongue slide into your hungry mouth, swirling around yours as you shouted through your high. She was making you feel so good, and you couldnât fucking think.Â
You felt like you were cumming for minutes before the harsh pulses slowed into soft twitches, her hips slowing, and she bent down to kiss you. The touch was soft, sweet, undeserved. You stiffened, on guard immediately.Â
She was close, she was too close. Her soft caresses on your face snapped you out of your intoxication, pulling away from her mouth and grabbing her hips to pull her off your dick.Â
âT-Turn around, Ellie.â
âHuh?â she asked softly, her eyes teary and delicate.Â
âT-Turn around,â your voice trembled.
âO-Okay.â
She was too fucking close.Â
She lifted off you, planting her feet on the ground and you spun her. You pulled her down on your lap, her ass in front of your cock. You grabbed your tip, pushing it past her entrance, and she mewled. She took it with ease, mewling out as her back arched into you, swallowing you whole as she sunk down again.Â
She planted her hands on your knees and immediately bounced on you, her toned ass meeting the base of your harness with every jump on your cock.Â
You could see her pussy suck on your inches, suffocating your girth, her walls clinging to you.Â
You grabbed her neck and pushed her forward slightly, and she cried out in painful pleasure. You planted your feet on the floor and fucked up into her.Â
âFuck! Your dick feels so fucking good! Oh myâagh!â
You saw even move cream spread over your dick with every fuck inside her squishy walls. You were moaning with her, fucking her harder, faster, the hand on her neck moving up to pull her hair hard. The sound of wet skin slapping accompanied the sounds you both made in your pleasured state.Â
You were going to cum so fucking quick, âFuck, Ellie, shitâ â
âIâm gonna cum so hard, mommy!â your hand in her hair flew down to her hip, grinding her down harder on you. You moaned at the feeling.
âYeah? Already?â You were right behind her, those euphoric waves pulling in your gut.
âFuckâfuckyes!â
âWant it so bad, get it all over this fucking dick, babyâ â
Her hand that'd been playing with her tits flew down on top of yours on her waist, her fingers lacing with yours tightly as she shouted, screaming your name. She met your harsh thrusts as she bounced, and she squirted on you again, and you watched it gush out of her, wetting your stomach and harness and the chair beneath her, the sound of splattering liquid on the floor making you cum the hardest you ever had. Your vision whitened as your orgasm crushed you.Â
She kept cumming on you, and you kept cumming for her. The pleasure didnât stop, and all you could do was scream her name out like she did yours, hold her hand tighter as your brain melted. She rocked back and forth on you, prolonging your orgasm, making you cum harder. It just kept building in intensity, the aggressive pulses wracking through you, your toes curling as she milked you, and all you could do was take it.
You blacked out in her momâs chair, the last thing you remember seeing was her pulsing, squirting pussy, pulsing ass, and the auburn stars that painted her entire back.Â
Some time passed, your lashes fluttering open as you felt soft touches on your face.Â
You were met with delicate, green eyes, Ellie looking at you with a softness you hadnât seen in years. It felt foreign, deep, and it made your heart pick up in panic.Â
You pulled away from her touches and looked around unsteadily.Â
She was too close. Too fucking close.
The office was a mess: clothes everywhere, the floor was soaked, the whole room smelled like sex and pussy, desk askew, its contents thrown everywhere, Ellieâs tears and puddles of spit all over the surface. You could even see splatters of⊠her on her motherâs restraining order against you.Â
You were suddenly terrified, moving into action and guiding her off your lap so you could stand. You undid the straps of your dick and stepped out of it, cringing at the drying stickiness, and throwing it into your backpack.
You heard her speak from behind you, âHey, hey, you okay? Whatâs wrâ â
âNothingâs wrong, Iâm fine, I gotta go,â you said tensely. Unwelcoming. Guarded.
âDid⊠did I do something?â She sounded too soft, too gentle.Â
âNo, Ellie, I just, I gotta go,â You dressed erratically, pulling your underwear up and jeans on, wincing at your cum sticking to your garments.Â
You could hear the crack in her voice, âCan I⊠do you need help orâ â
âEllie, Iâm fucking fine. Iâm fine, okay? Forget it.â You spat over your shoulder as you repacked. Donât look at her, donât fucking look at her.Â
She sounded just as anxious as you did, âW-Why are you so upset with me all of a sudden? Whatâd I doâ â
âYou didn't do shit! Can you fucking drop it please!â
Her breath shuddered, âI thought⊠I thought we were⊠okay?âÂ
You whipped around to face her, an incredulous look on your face. Your heart shattered when she flinched, but you yelled at her anyway. Why the hell did you look at her?
âWhy the fuck would we be okay?! Did you forget how we fucking met in the first place!â You pointed behind her to the soiled court order, ïżœïżœWeâre never going to be fucking okay! Get that through your fucking head.âÂ
You reached down to grab your heavy bag, throwing it over your shoulder in a hurry. You felt like you were going to suffocate. You needed to go. Right now. You turned towards the door. You hadnât even shut it all the way when you came in.Â
âIâm never going to see you again, am I?âÂ
Your own tears fell at the dejected acceptance in her voice. She sounded so broken, and it was all your fault.Â
But you knew this was for the best. The two of you could never exist together in bliss, even though meeting her was the most human youâve felt since you were a child. Since your father was alive.Â
But you were too different, too damaged. All you would do is hurt each other, you would resent each other, grow to hate, to regret. The world was too cruel, and she was not prepared for its harshness. You were barely prepared, and you lived it every day. And you promised yourself to never go through the despair of loss again. You walked towards the door and heard her release a quiet sob.Â
âNo,â you pulled the knob, the spacious hallway being another reminder that you didnât belong. Not here, not anywhere. Her mother was right.Â
You were worthless. Held no value in this society.Â
In another life, you couldâve been something great. Your cards couldâve been different, better. You couldâve made your father proud. The two of you couldâve been happy.
âYou wonât.âÂ
You left the same way you came, moving in urgency before her sobs lured you back to take her in your arms, against your will.Â
Maybe in another life.Â
hi lol OOOOOOWEEEEEÂ
this was heavy sorry gworlies i love sad shitÂ
donât hate me too much?Â
omg tell me what yâall thought or whatever *looks away shylyÂ
thank u 4 reading if u did :3
hi taglist love yall @cherriessxinthespring @ellieswifee @elliespookie @belovednanami @sevikasimp @saturnsellie
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omg i need smut for ballerina reader x tattoo artist ellie
pleaseeeee
hi hon i didn't forget ab u trust me trust me
âŠ. but hi guysđ€ since i finished sotp and this at literally the same time why not post both.... teeeheee
wc;cw: 1.9kđł, MDNI, ellie and reader r both freaks! nasty little harlots, these two are!!, kinda exhibitionism bc car windows, weed, shotgunning(failed), mentions of daddy kink and breeding and face sitting, readers a bimbo but we knew that we love u bae :3, more monologues, cocky ellie, dirty talk, spanking, mult. orgasms and squirting, slight dumbification, titty and pussy slapping mmm, das it
⊠i wrote this while high soooo if thereâs a typo no thereâs not! bye yall :p
when ballerina!reader and tattooist!ellie fuck for the first time the world damn near melts from the inside out.Â
you had finally gotten into the passenger's seat of ellieâs busted up car after she wrapped up your brand-new tat. you asked her multiple times if she was going to kill you in some nearby forest after smoking you out, in which she replied with a sly maybe. it depends on how you act when it hits. her response shook you a bit: you had just scored the lead in the nutcracker and your costume was so pretty, you had to wear it at least once and then she could do whatever she wanted with you as long as she destroyed your guts beforehand! :)Â
your little tote bag was near your feet on the floor as you hummed along to the rap song blasting through her speakers, lightly bobbing your head. ellieâsâlarge and veiny and tattooedâhand had been sitting on your upper thigh for the entire ride as she drove in a relaxed position, head resting against the back of her seat. you caught glimpses of her out of the corner of your eye whenever she licked or bit her lips. her small habits made your thighs squeeze together, before she silently pried them back open with her free hand to rest it there again. you wanted her to make you cum so bad youâd pay her extra for itâ
âthis your place?â she rasped out in shock as she parked in front of your dance academy dorms. damn, she thought. you werenât kidding, youâre not a stripper.Â
âuh huh! itâs even prettier inside! marble floors and everything, i love it here so much!â you said with an excited grin that made her smile lightly. such a cutie, she thought.Â
âhuh,â she hummed in acknowledgment. she reached over your lap to pop open her glove box to retrieve the little ziplock baggie filled with green buds and grinder before your eyes widened in shock.Â
âoh are⊠um⊠are we smoking right here? like out in the open?âÂ
âmhm.â she replied blankly before she smirked. âwhat, is your headmaster gonna come out and give you a spanking or something?âÂ
you wanted her to spank you so badâ
âno! iâm just asking, iâve never done it outside before!âÂ
âoh yeah? you never done it outside?â she replied silkily while she packed the spoon of the pipe.Â
you shivered and she caught it and please fuck me right here! i donât care who sees!â
âi never used one of those before, itâs pretty,â you nodded towards the packed bowl.Â
âthank you,â she said simply. âlemme show you how to do it.âÂ
after some simple instructions that you haven't payed attention to because her hands were distracting you, you nodded absentmindedly. what the fuck was she talking about againâ
âare you even listening?â she said with a raised eyebrow that had a fucking slit in it oh, ohhh you might dieâ
when you shook your head no, she snorted before she grabbed her lighter from your hand.Â
âhere. watch me.âÂ
you watched closely as she lit the crushed green buds in the bowl, finger over a little hole on the side of the pipe before she lit it and breathed in, exhaling the smoke in a circular little cloud in front of her mouth. she looked back at you with a little see? simple.Â
sheâs so fucking sexy and youâre probably dripping all over her leather seatsâ
âshow me again?â you squeaked out.Â
she only slightly nodded with a cunning grin as she looked at you before she repeated her previous actions and blew the smoke away from you, handing you the pipe again. you pushed it away from you gently.Â
âyouâre gonna make me smoke all this by myself?âÂ
âi want you to do it for me⊠like blow it⊠blow it in my mouth?â you said shyly. your mind was cloudy.Â
she didnât say anything, but you could see the pleasant surprise on her face, releasing a light chuckle before she lit the bowl, yet again!, inhaling the smoke and holding it before she gripped for your cheeks with her slightly calloused hand, pulling you so close that your noses were touching. your mouth dropped open on instinct, and slowly exhaled the smoke into your mouth.Â
you could barely inhale due to the pounding in your head and your chest and your swollen fucking clitâ
ellie hardly even cared about you wasting a rip that good. she slowly slipped her tongue into your already open mouth, making you whimper as you wrapped your lips around it, sucking it further into your mouth. she released a satisfied hum that rattled your throat. and speaking of your throatâ
she released your cheeks, sliding her large hand down to wrap around it, squeezing the sides and gauging your reaction. you were about to call her daddy, holy fuck, you wanted her fuckinâ kidsâ
âcâmere.â and fuck, you jumped her bones so quick.Â
you were finally in her lap and you immediately started grinding on her leg like a cat in heat.Â
she hurriedly sat the pipe on her dashboard, her free hands quickly taken in yours, bringing them up to your tits as you felt her squeeze them, tossing your head back with a whine.
âyeah? feels fucking good?âÂ
âyeah, yesyesyesââ
you werenât even high and you were so close to cumming, you couldnât imagine how crazy youâd be going if you smoked properly. youâd probably be creaming all over her seats and windows by now.Â
you grinded down harder on her, your clit bumping up against your lavender sweats and her jeans and toned leg and you couldnât stop crying out and oh, you were gonna cum in your pantiesâ
ellie mustâve sensed it because she dropped her hands from your tits to your hips, mindfully avoiding your freshly wrapped tattoo(sheâs such a sweetie, isnât she?), and pulled you down onto her leg as she lifted it up to press harder against your clit just right and you lost it.Â
all that tension that built over the last two hours crashed into you as you threw your head allll the back and came inside your sheer little panties. you bounced on her thigh as she held your hips to help you grind out your high. ellie slowly licked up your exposed throat to your chin to your bottom lip before she shoved her tongue into your mouth in a messy, wet kiss. fuck, you were so in love alreadyâ
âtake these off, baby, câmon, wanna see,â she said dazed against your mouth, tugging down the waistband of your bottoms. you clumsily rested your weight against her wheel as you leaned back, a loud honk! ringing through the dimly lit, empty lot. it made you both jump and laugh as she wrapped her arm around your back to move you away from it. she used the space between you to pull down your panties and sweats just enough to expose your sopping cunt. she looked like she wanted to tear you apart. she could rip you to shreds if she wanted youâd let her do anything to youâ
she didnât say anything as her thumb rubbed your clit, making you buck your hips up against her hang with a whine.Â
she dipped two fingers down to your slit that was practically dripping all over her seats, and she hates herself for not bringing her dick with her because, fuuuuck, she wouldâve slipped right inâ
you felt her fingers push inside with little resistance, her car immediately being filled with both your groans and wet noises of your cunt. your walls squeezed the shit out of her fingers to pull them in closer.
you were a mess: at some point youâd removed your sweatshirt and tee, your tits out, and she was watching you play them, entranced, until you slipped a hand down to where she was inside you, grabbing her wrist to pull out and brought her slicked up fingers to your nipples, rubbing your wetness into your stiff peaks. ellie let out a quiet groan of shiiiit! before she slapped them both, bringing her head forward to suck the wetness from your tits, moaning at the taste of you.
she dropped her hand back down to slip her fingers inside your cunt again, wiggling them around until she pressed up against that one spot that made you see godâ
âyeah? right there, baby? like that?âÂ
âyeâaaAhh, el, oh my fuckinâ god your gonna make me cum again!ââÂ
âfuckinâ want it, nasty fucking slut, give it to me, wanâ it all over me.âÂ
your eyes were rolled into your skull, yes im your slut iâm your slut! being the only thing on your mind. your legs were trembling and you were so. fucking. wet. and you couldnât fucking think about anything other than her her herâ
âcum on my fingers so i can take you upstairs and stick my tongue inside you.âÂ
and you died. youâre dead now. you screamed her name out into the car as you squirted all over her arm and jeans and seats and you just kept fucking cumming and ellie swore that she was going to marry you one day!â
you finally started to come down after she slapped your pussy a couple times. your orgasm had felt like it lasted minutes and you almost plopped onto the car floor in exhaustion, but ellie caught you before you could, pulling you back to her chest to connect her mouth with yours in a heavy kiss.Â
she grabbed your ass in both hands before bringing her hand down in a loud slap! as you moaned in her mouth, and it made her hit you again, harder.Â
she allowed you to pull back to regain your composure before you said with a pout, âi have to be up at five tomorrow.â it was almost midnight.Â
she laughed loudly before bringing your panties and pants back up around your waist before helping you put your shirt on before easing you back into the passenger's seat. you missed her warmth already. you grabbed your tote off the floor after carefully placing the discarded pipe and lighter into a small pocket with a soft câmon before you opened the door to get out. ellie rolled the window down so she could respond.Â
âwait. you want me to come inside?âÂ
âinside me? yeah.âÂ
she let out a choked laugh before she said, âyouâre nasty as fuck, jesus christ.âÂ
âi sure am! now come sit on my face? my roomieâs sleeping so you might have to stick my panties in your mouth just in case!â you said with the brightest grin. âyou can wake up me up for rehearsals with your tongue in my pussy, too, if you want!âÂ
oh my fucking god? ellie thought, her eyes glossing over with a hazy look on her face. yeah. iâm making her a fucking housewife.
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