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issabeauty1-blog · 5 years

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Love Untraditional

IT was a few days before Thanksgiving 2018. This would have made 2 maybe 3 Thanksgivings that I spent as a single female. Not that the prior 7-8 years was any different, but my heart was healing from an unexpected breakup. Let me explain. Nathan was supposed to had been my everything. I mean, he was an amazing man. He gave me everything I thought that I needed. I felt protected (and we all want to feel protected). He stood about 6 feet 5 inches, dark chocolate complexion. Although he was lacking in certain anatomy of his body and looks, he made up for it in his intelligence. He showed me things that I had never seen before and always made me feel secure about my extra rolls. He encouraged me and wasn’t afraid of my strong demeanor. If I could say one thing that I least liked about him it would be his non-emotional disposition. I hated that! He was extremely egotistical and cocky on top of that. I guess I partial to blame when I bragged about how good he was in bed. Things began to change when he had to relocate for work. His career was always very important to him. I give him that, he was a hard worker and good at what he did. Although his job bounced him around from state to state, we always managed to see each other once a month….at least. Then the visits started to become far in between. And when we did see each other, if we weren’t having a petty disagreement, we were humping like rabbits. And it didn’t help much that his Caribbean background caused for lots and lots of alcohol. And of course alcohol sometimes leads to things we aren’t so proud of like exploring weird, in the closet desires. And then BOOM, after his mom passed he hit me with the ultimate betrayal. He told me that he had been seeing other women the whole time we’ve been dating! The whole damn time. Now at this time of confession, we were kinda sorta broken up. I just took a quick flight to see him because his mom had passed. He continued on about how much he still loved me but was currently in a relationship. That he had told her all about me and that she was okay with us still being together. This nigga must have been on dog food. Needless to say, I declined his offer. And although I declined his offer, somehow I just couldn’t let go. I did all sorts of foolish things that we as women sometimes do. I stalked his social media, I tried to make myself present places that I knew he would be. I made idol threats just to start an unavoidable argument. I called him from several burner numbers just to hear his voice or maybe I was just hoping to catch him at a weak moment. But the weaker I got, the stronger he got and the quicker he got over me. So finally, I allowed myself to be heart broken for the first time in my life. I allowed myself to be vulnerable and to admit that this man had hurt me deeply. And instead of being revengeful and plotting on how I was going to hurt his ass back, I just spent several days crying. And before I knew it, I was over him and I was over being in love!

So time went on and I felt it was time for me to start dating or fucking again…However you look at it. I started reaching out to those fuckboys who I knew wanted to be with me at any cost. But when the time came, I backed out. I do value my goods. After being so disappointed by the men I seem to attract, I started to believe it was me. That God had forgotten about me in the romance department. I felt myself being desperate and joining online dating sites just to get attention. Tinder was the most accessible, since it was free and everybody was swiping right. I found myself always swiping right but never finding Mr. Right. I met this one man who I had been chatting with for over 2 months. A nice looking guy from Philly with a calming voice and an average personality. He was nice to talk on a daily basis. He would send me pictures everyday. As I waited patiently, he finally sent me the infamous dick pic. And it was impressive. So I finally decided its time to meet. When I finally got the courage to meet with him, we decided to have our first date at the movies. We met outside the theatre and I call myself gonna sneak up and surprise him. But he had the surprise. From a distance he looked just like his pictures. He was dressed nice and casual. Low hair cut with deep waves. This man turned around and gave me the biggest smile. WHERE THE FUCK ARE YIUR TEETH??? All I saw was pure darkness!! How could he think that it was appropriate to meet me for the first time with no fucking teeth! Like bruh… I didn’t know if I should run, scream or kick his ass for wasting my time! So he asks for a hug and I give him a church hug with a gentle pat on the back. I didn’t want to get too close to feel any sort of bulge. We go inside the theatre and I immediately ask for several drinks. He ask me if I was nervous and I replied no, but I was thinking I just want to drink until my vision was blurred, lol. After the movie we went to dinner. He asks where did I want to eat and I’m looking for the most expensive restaurant in Boca Raton. But since it was so late, we ended up going to Juniors. He orders a burger, fries and onion rings. When they brought our food it was enormous and I’m sitting there waiting to see how he’s gonna eat with no teeth. And he had the nerve to ask the waitress for some pickles…Lol. She gave him pickle spears and he began sucking out the soft center. GROSS!! He has been fumbling with his food for about 30 minutes and yet to take a bite. I know he’s hungry so I excuse myself and head to the bathroom so he can scarf down his food. Hope he don’t choke I remember thinking. Before he could pay the bill my Uber was pulling up. Needless to say I didn’t see nor speak with him again.

After being shamed by my sons, my grandma and friends I vowed not go on any online dating sites again. And for the many months to follow, I keep a fresh pack of batteries. It’s now the holiday day season and a lot has changed. I’m a new grandma, new job and a new look on life. I remember cooking the day before Thanksgiving. I had just finished my first bottle of Moscato and the holiday blues is starting to set in. I grabbed my phone to text Nathan but stopped myself. Good girl!! But instead, I refreshed my Tinder page. After a few swipes right, I came across a match with BG. Now BG profile really caught my attention. He was from NY and grew up in Baltimore. He was a single dad and owned his own business. So we began to chat. We chatted all that night and even Thanksgiving day. For some strange reason, I really wanted to meet this guy before wasting my time. And he wanted to see me also. So we agreed to meet after dinner at my community pool house. I freshened my braids, threw on a cute t-shirt and some shorts. I walked across the parking lot to meet him. He pulled up in a bumble bee. It was clean and he looked nice driving it. He parked and I got in. His pictures didn’t do him justice. It was no coincidence that I was strongly attracted to him and him to me. We sat in his car and talked for hours. It was like we knew each other before. After that night, he immediately text me asking for a real date and I quickly accepted. He picked me up the next day and we headed to the beach. Sounds nice enough until he mentioned it was a “clothing optional” beach. Upon arriving to the beach, all I could see was wrinkled old nuts and tits. It was people from all walks of life. I couldn’t believe he would take me here on a first date. We set up the chairs, the tent and undressed to our swim attire. He went to the water as I stayed behind since I can’t swim. After awhile he encouraged me to get in the water. It was fun I must admit. He held me tight promising not to let me fall. After swimming we headed back to the tent. He dusted the sand off my body. The tent was big enough for us both to fit inside comfortably, so we laid down. He spread the blankets down. I started to complain that my skin was dry after getting out the water and he had baby oil…OF COURSE HE DID. He asked me real gentleman like if he could give me a massage! And ladies we all knows what comes next after he plays the massage card. I changed my Pandora station from Maxwell to R. Kelly because I knew this was gonna be good. His hands were so strong and warm against my trembling skin. Mind you, it has been close to two years since I’ve let a man get this close to me. I laid on my stomach and he had definitely done this before, probably a few times that week alone. He rubbed me slowly yet deep enough so it seemed like a massage. But it was more than that. It was erotic and sinful and I loved it. He worked his skillful hands to my hips. He asked me to spread my legs so he could oil my inner thighs, I obliged. I was so nervous yet so turned on at the same time. I closed my eyes tighter and tighter as he explored my body. I give it to him, he played it very safe…looking for any signs of him crossing the line. But I gave him an all access pass. He then started to gently tug at the strings that held my bikini bottom together. At this point, it was no turning back. Not that I wanted to. I assisted him in untying my bikini. His hands quickly found them back between my thighs. He seductively found himself rubbing the outside of my pulsating vagina. He then took what must have been his middle long finger and with an unexpected thrust, it slide inside my pussy full of juices. It must have felt just as good to him as it did to me because I felt his body moan. I then felt something warm dripping on my leg. And just like that, this man had ended my two year draught.

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