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makeste · 5 years

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How do you think Bakugo feels about Izuku choosing Deku for his hero name? Like, in meta form - BKG thoughts on the Pro-Hero name Deku.

disclaimer before I start: I don’t think anyone can ever really say for sure what Bakugou is thinking at any given time. least of all Bakugou himself, who doesn’t really understand what feelings actually are, and doesn’t know much about them in general except that they are his enemy, most days. but my point being that this is mostly just a lot of elaborate speculation on my part.

okay so first of all, when he first heard Deku announce it, I expect that he was surprised, and then confused. because from his point of view it’s a very strange decision. who the hell chooses their insulting childhood nickname as their hero moniker? we all know the story of the legendary hero Butthead*, who either lost a bet or underestimated the longevity of his funny joke (the details have been lost to the ages and are now the subject of much scholarly debate), and subsequently served as a cautionary tale to all young bros coming up through hero school and thinking of giving into peer pressure, having not yet developed the wisdom to realize that five seconds of class clown fame aren’t worth a potential lifetime of ridicule. but aside from him, the idea of someone choosing a name like “Deku” is pretty absurd. just. who does that?? for real.

*not an actual hero.

so I’m pretty sure that once the initial confusion passed, Katsuki then settled on his usual default of assuming that it must be Deku looking down on him again. because, you know. why bother listening to the actual explanation Deku gave barely two seconds later, when you could instead make a paranoid, irrational, and rather egotistical (because I mean, this does kind of make it all about him) leap and just assume your old childhood “friend” is mocking you yet again. that’s the Bakugou way, goddammit. good old inferiority complex constantly whispering that you’re not good enough, and you consequently being on the defensive all the time because you’re afraid other people will see it as well, and god forbid! cue John Mulaney “that’s the thing I’m sensitive about!!” gifs, etc. and Deku in particular has always watched him so insufferably closely, and Bakugou just knows it’s because he can see those weaknesses too. Deku knows. he knows. and Bakugou can’t fucking stand it.

anyway. so clearly if he’s picking “Deku” as his hero name, that must be his way of sending some kind of message, right? basically a big fuck you. clearly that’s the only explanation that makes sense. so fuck that, basically, and Deku can fuck right off, and god he’s the worst!! and so this is my best estimate of what Bakugou initially thought about Deku’s hero name. and unfortunately, given how stubborn and oblivious Bakugou remained about their relationship for a very long time, he probably carried on thinking this for quite a while.

but at some point this did change! and there are two parts to that. the first concerns Bakugou’s reluctant but nonetheless very real respect for Izuku as a rival. this is something that’s been growing steadily since their first fight at Ground Beta in chapters 8 through 10. that battle was the very last time Katsuki ever underestimated Izuku. when he lost to him, that put an end to any high and mighty thoughts he might have had about being superior. instead he grew even more wary of him and more obsessed than ever with comparing their progress and trying to expand the ever-closing gap between them (to no avail). which to be clear was not much of an improvement in regards to this being any kind of healthy relationship. but it does demonstrate that Bakugou has acknowledged Izuku’s power going quite a long ways back. and if you really want to get deep about it, he’s subconsciously been acknowledging it since they were four years old, and that’s precisely why he hated him for so long, but that’s a whole nother topic of conversation for another day.

anyway. so getting back on track, as I said, this is the first part of the gradual change in Bakugou’s opinion of Deku’s hero name. as his grudging respect for Deku gradually increased – and then rose very sharply and suddenly when he finally realized that Deku got his power from All Might, the hero they’ve always both admired – I suspect his thoughts on the name “Deku” started to change as well. and the other change, I think, probably came when he realized that Deku never was looking down on him. when they fought again at Ground Beta, and all of their suppressed and confused feelings were dragged into the light, and Deku explained – not for the first time, but it was the first time Katsuki ever really listened – that he chased after him because he admired him. oh. so this whole time, then… oh.

so then once he finally understands that, the name “Deku” definitely has to be seen in a different light. if it wasn’t ever intended to be some kind of weird burn on him, then that probably means that Deku was being honest all along, and it was just his way of telling the world “I am here”, and taking a part of his past that he’d once felt very badly about and turning it into something to be proud of. oh.

I don’t honestly know what Katsuki’s thoughts are on his past treatment of Izuku. I don’t know if he’s quite there yet where he’s ready to take a good long look at himself and acknowledge that he was a real shithead for a very long time, and that he bears pretty much all of the responsibility for what went on between them for so many years. I believe that he will get there, eventually, but he’s never been the type of person to do much reflecting and looking back. he’s always been more focused on looking forward. so even if he does acknowledge it, I think his way of trying to atone would be by treating Izuku better from here on out, not by dwelling over the past. he does owe him an apology for sure, and I like to think we may actually get it, particularly if the subject of quirklessness comes up in the future, or if the plot presents some kind of other in-your-face reminder that forces him to come face to face with it and acknowledge it. then at that point I think he’d apologize because if nothing else he’s not a coward, and to try and shy away from taking responsibility would be the cowardly thing to do. so yeah, I’m definitely holding out hope for this. but I also think that the bigger part of his apology to Izuku has to be his change in behavior moving forward. and in that respect he’s already made significant progress, so that’s great.

anyway, so the reason I bring that up is because I don’t think Katsuki often consciously thinks about the meaning of the nickname “Deku” these days, and what it actually means to him. Deku is Deku, mostly. it used to mean “useless”, and then at some point I think it just started meaning “Deku.” as in the person. just like he’ll always be “Kacchan” to Izuku. Izuku is “Deku” to him. it’s just how it is.

and I think the meaning of it has changed, for him, but not to “dekiru.” rather, it’s changed for him in the same way that his opinions on Deku-the-person have changed. I noted at the start of this essay that Katsuki isn’t really someone who’s particularly in touch with his feelings. and his feelings about Deku are a lot. and while he’s not usually someone to back down from a challenge, emotionally he might not quite be ready to start examining them all too closely just yet.

so for now, Deku is simply Deku. someone who formerly only ever pissed him off. but nowadays… maybe not so much.

anyway, so that’s my meandering rant about Kacchan’s thoughts on Deku’s hero name. in the end I went all over the place and didn’t really arrive at anything concrete! but I gave it my best go. thanks for the ask!

#bnha #boku no hero academia #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #bakudeku #bnha meta #essay #makeste reads bnha #asks #bakugou meta

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