#visited my gma

[piizunn]

salt spring island, unceeded coast salish territory

(8/13/22)

#visited my gma #and this airbnb has a bed in the garden #also the second image is titled catholic trauma #photography #artist #coast salish #unceeded territory #so called #british columbia #salt spring island #pacific northwest #north west coast #my photos

[amygdalae]

Post of mine from last year where I poked fun at lana del rays lyrics is circulating again hopefully they will not try to suicide bait me like when it first blew up. And be niceys to me

#also hi i havent been active cuz im still on vacay visiting my gma in da midwest :^) its fun here i actually do enjoy it quite a bit #my queue is running out ill refill it once i get home

[teamdays]

I think I have always been so fascinated with my parents early lives in mx I am always so curious to learn more about what life was like back then in rural areas vs urban areas especially w dating and “courtship” back then because the way my mom talks about it you would think they were doing 1800’s type sneaking around and love letters just to talk to each other every 5 months . In the 80’s. Unfortunately my dad on the other hand tells me one interesting fact about the past every maybe three years. But we push on.

#I wanna see if there’s maybe some more 20th century mx history classes I can take next semester cause when I took one in hs it was v fun.. #there’s this guy on insta who’s always posting old photo reels from different states from like the 30’s to 80’s and it’s soo fascinating #I wish I could’ve learned more from my grandparents too but at this point the only person I can really talk to about history that far back #is my maternal gma and I was super busy last time she visited we hardly spoke at all

[cyberstabbing]

it's been nearly two years and i'm still mad about the time my grandmother forced me to debate lgbt rights at a family reunion lunch with her, her catholic husband and a catholic priest. i was just now in the shower and i kept imagining all the snarky comebacks i could have said. if i had chosen that moment to come out to my family (i don't know a single soul on that family tree who is out) it would have been a disaster but also such a fucking power move

#but i'm continuously suprised by my emotions #like why do i care so much??? #might be that my grandmother facetimes me two days ago and spoke of how proud of me she is and that she wishes i'd visit this summer #like goddamn talk about conditional love #she's made several queer students of her's go back into the closet #even converted a few to catholicism :( #no doubt in my mind that she'd try to convince me that this is the devil's (or swedish lib propaganda) work #but seriously it must have been obvious to anyone at that table that i cared a little Too Much for me to be just an ally #also had my first panic attack in years right after that convo 🥰 tnx gma #mine #she's the only grandparent i've had a relationship with though #granddad1: deadbeat+abusive+alcoholic+dead #grandma1:died before i was born #granddad2:quite honestly maybe a pedo. mom even recently confessed that's why she never left me alone with him #i love oversharing on tumblr lol

[tinky-winky-files-archive]

#mine #visiting my gma’s house that is definitely haunted

[ratscabies]

this is the best thanksgiving ever bc we're not seeing extended family today so I get to stay at home and cook and blog

#well we visited my gma in the nursing home this morning #but we're not doing food things with extended family

[thedragonagelesbian]

m9......... soon..........................

#things are looking up in every possible way #grad school apps are almost finished my dad is coming home tomorrow my gma is visiting again wed #and........... They. My Blorbos. The Most Blorbos Ever.

[fortunatefool]

taking my day off to clean up my apt, took a walk down to the shops for some shake and papers and had enough for breakfast and treats at the dollar tree. the wind smells like saltwater but not fishy. having a smoke on the porch and listening to uncle kracker lol I wore my denim skirt out. feeling very cute and calm and nostalgic :)

#i love nu metal and butt rock im sorry guys linkin park and nickelback are good u guys are a bunch of haters #my stuff #gma is bringing ma over and were going to have a little visit #gma wanted to go out to eat but mom cant eat anything but liquids so were judt gonna hang out here for a bit #which makes me anxious bc then idk when they will leave #i was thinking around 5 hopefully i love them but i need my days off esp lately #between moms surgery and my meltdown and working 10 days in a row i fucking forgot to pay my rent lmaooooo #my landlady is very cool though which is an insane thing to say she was like yea ur not ever late wats wrong u ok? and i explained

[snekdood]

i think some ppl dont understand the difference between being full on consciously bigoted + going out of your way to harass a minority and someone who heard phrases from their friends and family while not actually holding any ill will towards whichever minority

#i was both best friends with a black girl in middle school and also had my sister showing me racist videos and stereotypes #did it make me say things that i totally shouldnt have and didnt know i shouldnt say? for fucking sure- regardless i still never personally #saw her as bad or less than or anything at all. it probably helped that my childhood friend was filipino bc i was already exposed to #different people. its like the whole words vs actions thing. ppl would say words to me and i would parrot them thinking i was being #funny like my brother or sister but ultimately i never saw anyone as different than me and never really treated anyone differently either #i was a child who didnt understand the weight or meaning of things i parroted and trusted those around me to know better #since i was literally a fuckin' child. thats kinda what they do. and no one ever really countered me if i did something wrong? #there was one time in like 2nd grade where i had just come from a really christiany catholicy school to a different better cooler school #that was less oppressive and DIDNT require me to participate in church shit and wear a uniform- #and i was still not very exposed to black people at that time yet #so when i was in second grade there was a black kid (different person from my friend in middle school) and we were sitting at a table #and i was just kinda making an observation like 'you're black!' not a negative thing just like 'oh! i understand what this is! i know what #this is ive heard of ppl like this before and maybe met one or two black ppl previously!' lmao and then i followed it up with 'like martin #luther king!' bc he was probably one of the only black ppl i knew about and i literally learned about him when i visited the school for #the first time to try it out in first grade and then apparently everyone thought i was being super offensive?????????????????? #?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? #i dont really remember the details and my gma remembers an entirely different thing so idek whats the truth but thats how i remember it #going down. i wasnt trying to be rude or offensive i was just like 'oh you're this! like this person ive heard of! neat :)!' and apparently #it got interpreted as a really bad thing that i said and idk. that was probably one of the weirder experiences i had growing up #like maybe its not always fun to be known for the minority you are bc of a famous person whos of the same minority...?? idk #i still to this day dont know what i said wrong really. i just wasnt exposed to very many black ppl #i knew of like one black girl once at a gymnastics thing i did sometimes and we were friends and i was a tiny tiny child all of this #happening way before 2nd grade and all i remember is her dad and my dad talking and me going to her fancy house to swim in her pool #once. and then i stopped doing gymnastics for whatever reason. so i wasnt exactly super exposed to black ppl frequently. #esp since the christianty-catholicy school was full of rich white kids. and so was my neighborhood at the time. #so i wasnt trying to be mean or offensive to this guy in 2nd grade but it got interpreted that way and then everyone treated me different #bc ig they thought i was a certain way bc the teachers were overreacting a bit. i have no idea. i really just think that one white #girl just liked to bully me and didnt actually have a good reason why and im tired of trying to humor ppl thinking its bc i was a bigot 😒 #like i wouldnt be surprisedif nowadays that how she tries to justify it but NONE of what she ever did was calling me out or anything #it was ALLLLL treating me different for being 'weird' in her eyes. but i digress.

[cascadianights]

As someone who has never known if I would/could have a child, it is so incredibly significant to me how much love the puppies I've raised will spread in the world

I grew up with dogs, one a year older than me and one a decade younger - more since. I always had a dozen animals around me, but I am also chronically ill and disabled. So I waited over a decade into my adult life to get a dog.

I knew I needed a service dog, and that I'd have to put my years of work with animals into it because I'd never afford one (or the crystal clear diagnoses to get granted one). I didn't even begin to consider it until after I'd spent months taking care of a roommate's wolf-dog, and even then...

I wasn't considering puppies. He was, to replace the dog he'd lost, but I hadn't even batted an eye at any of the many he'd shown me. Then I saw Alice - one of over half a dozen mutts produced from a husky breeder mating with a family Pitt. Something clicked. Suddenly I was going, just to see, and was pulling money out of the bank on the way. When I got there, it was past dark and I sat in a dimly lit hut outside while a brindle puppy climbed into my lap and refused to leave.

There were others, with one blue and one brown eye each, with husky golden coats that could've passed for purebred. Who were friendlier, more enthusiastic. But she planted herself in my lap, and there she stayed the hours drive home.

She was so easy to work with. Quick to learn, eager to please and devastated to disappoint. She was always in tune with my body & mind, more than I'm able to be, and even heavily pregnant would tell me just when to turn around before the pain in my ankle began, or when I needed to sit before the world spun in front of me. Nevermind the panic attacks, the leading me out of stores while I'm dissociating out of my mind. The way she checks in as soon as the intrusive thoughts - "you can't see them, so something horrible must've happened" - take over. The way she sleeps touching me (or my partner) at nearly all times.

But for all the ways she helped me, helped us, it's been even more amazing to watch her move through the world. Greeting people at parties with a contained enthusiasm, trotting up to strangers without fear the second she hears the go-ahead. People see her and beam, they pet her and smile as she shoves her toy back into their hand in offering. Little children clap and point, the youngest babies reach out and laugh in delight as she gently licks their face or outstretched palm. My sister's toddler follows obediently after her with a hand at her waist, resting on Alice's back. Workers smile through weary masks and babies beam and adults giggle and croon.

She brings the best to everyone. She brings joy and smiles and laughter, calm and peace and safety. She's everything I hoped for in a dog and more, and she's one of my companions and partners through this terrifying world.

And she had babies. She had puppies to nurse and raise and care for, and she did so every minute diligently and gently and lovingly. And now they're spread throughout the world, through friends and family and friends that are like family, to bring the world more of the joy and peace and calm that she brings. I see pictures and videos and hear stories from friends and friends of friends, and get to run into the very puppies born into my hand barely a few pounds on this earth now spreading so much love and joy and hope. Every puppy went to a loving home I trust, and every one of them is spreading that same love and hope and joy through the world and that is! Incredible!!!

#pets #to come back to #my sister got one of the puppys and already ive gotten video of him in his crate w several new & old toys & two new beds #and a thank you text from my step gma about how much love and joy hes already brought her and how he gets along w her GIANT WEIMERENER #And ive gotten so many pics and updates from friends and theyre all growing and learning so well #and so chill!!! ive met so many off the wall puppies this age just biting your hands and plsying away and i realize now #they were probably taken too young or not getting exercise bc everyone reports/has when i visit the calmest pups #and the two i have just play w the group and nap w us all and repeat lmao #theyre so sweet and loving and give all the kisses #rn one is in my lap laying parallel and against her mom #and the other is above my partner's pillow (she doesnt like sleep jostling) #i just love them so much!!!!! talk about spreading love!!!!!! talk about spreading joy!!!!!!!!!! #my amazing bean and Fen (not mentioned here but an amazing gentle soft boi despite going throuhh hell) #(just wants love and pets and to learn how to play tug properly lol) #made the best lil beans and i wouldnt have bred them otherwise but man!! man!!!!!! #you can hope itll turn out good and then like #seeing it #seeing them all be so good andnher and Fen be so loving to them and hearing so many people tell me #thank you for the love and joy you brought to my life through these!!! #like thats all i ever wantez

[kayspaceprince]

.

#my stuff #hmm. i have discovered the worst part about growing up and still living at home #watching in real time as your parents are better parents to rando kids #i try not to be bitter but like. the fact remains my parents were HELLA absent when i was in grade school (one physically one emotionally) #and now they're all into 'adopting' teens at church or friends' kids/grandkids #anyway just found out I was actually Not Invited TM to visit my gma this weekend bc they didn't get a dogsitter and also didn't TELL ME #idk man i've just had a shitty mental day bc waking up late for work and forgetting my headphones = self hate central #as soon as pill time hits im going to bed where i can cry in peace #and read saving my darling. i want some dumb (non pejorative) schmoop. maybe get around to rereading Birds To a Lighthouse if I REALLY wan #a good cry. it's a v good v sad holmes/watson fic 11/10 do recommend #i dunno. i guess i just thought I’d grow out of my mom being able to hurt my feelings #god it feels so CHILDISH but she DID and she DOES #this sucks #reading this back I’m like. hmm. oh yeah you were the one who had to be the ‘easy kid’ once you were able to #‘control’ read: hide #your emotions #the worst part about being being hurt by other people is then i feel STUPID #and bam self hate spiral #why do i make excuses for people who don’t change????

[slutforcoffein]

City kid enjoying village life

#sel talks #visiting my gma for easter

[bukuoshin]

All dressed up with nowhere to go... *packs up a hobo bindle and walks away dejectedly*

#rae rants #remember like two years ago when i was supposed to go see my gma for the first time in ~10 years for her birthday? #and then my brother cancelled? it happened again. #i dont understand why he keeps getting mad at me for not visiting her and then makes it an impossibility. #like! i wanted to! i curled my hair for two hours! i coordinated a pink outfit cuz i thought she'd like a softer feminine look! #sighs whimpers oh wont /anyooone/ feel bad for me? #i think hes trying to keep me out of the will or smth...? #im posting this just in case i need documentation or smth idk geez! ... he wont even tell us what hospital shes in. #idec abt the will i just would like to see her before she dies.

[centrifuge-politics]

gkdsgh omg I saw your tags on the Santa post and it's not remotely the point of the post itself but: Same Hat on having never totally believed in Santa but having been absolutely sold on the Tooth Fairy! I don't know why one seemed totally real to Child Me and the other not, my parents treated them both about the same, but that's how it was! XD

same Santa hat 🤝 lmao! im born and raised jewish so the seed of belief was never even planted in me. My parents treated santa like a fictional character so I didn’t ever think he was real. But they were fully behind the tooth fairy mythos and played into it as long as they could!

Being a jewish kid though i completely believed in the prophet elijah! During passover, you’re supposed to invite him in and give him an empty chair at the seder table and a cup of wine which he would then “drink” over the course of the seder and when i tell you i KNEW he was right there in the room with us! he was my jewish santa claus 😂

#we did xmas with my catholic gma and she didnt even have a chimney for santa to come down so clearly hes fake? #flawless kid logic #santa came to visit my kindergarten class and i straight up told him ‘im jewish i dont believe in santa claus’ #and he said ‘well ok how about i still give you a candy cane’ #jewish #telekinetic talking #pilferingapples

[legal-poppy]

my skinny ass cousin fatshamed my grandma and called her racist all in one fucking night

#'if gma doesnt like any of the food at my grad party she can just go a day without food look at her' #followed by 'none of her grandkids are ~purely~ white but gma wont eat anything other than bbq' #not that this kid would know anyways!! he only visits every other year for max 2 days #the woman can barely taste and has a restricted diet bc she was HOSPITALIZED TWO MONTHS AGO but this dumbfuck never bothered to visit #so he wouldnt know #he said ~purely white~ in such a weird ass fucking way too #dear god i almost decked him i cant take a whole week of this

[thenighttrain]

gma said “She does have a big announcement coming up on a whole new way you can see her…” so tour movie/documentary? hologram? she's personally visiting my house? 😩