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#very meme voice: wait. you were a villain on purpose? like cause you wanted to?
How Touya pictures you as a villain as Hex: Aww, I don't really know how to fight! I don't even like it, it's not my thing. I just wanna be support! It's dangerous for me to be on the field. Do you really think I could do it? Would you help train me me, Touya? 👉🏽👈🏽 Then we can be a team together! UwU
How you actually were as Siren, stalking your targets down the halls covered in blood from wheels to wrist: Daisy, daisy, give me your answer, do~ I'm half-crazy all for the love of you...~ =)
#hex!fic#this discrepancy is mostly because he only knows you as the ex-villain civilian who he literally watched have a panic attack over blood#and I address that#like he hears you SAY you were a villain once and obviously stalks your information and finds the incredibly gorey scenes you'd leave#because you were fucking crazy#but it does not compute in his head and he chalks the majority of the violence up to your sibling(s) influence#because as violent as you were the rest of your family is WORSE and that is true#which fun fact!!!!!!!!!! Is why he erases them in the fantasy!!!!!!!#You're not really Like That you're just a poor victim of circumstance and bad family influences!!!!!!!!#just like him!!!!!!!!!!!#and honestly the more I think about it the more I feel like touya might've liked you less if he knew that right away#which is SUPER funny cause I hc that if it was in any other direction#like if he met you as a villain while he was a villain#or you were a villain and he was a hero#he would be all over you#but now he has such an innocent almost victim perception of you that it would take him awhile to wrestle with the opposite being true#very meme voice: wait. you were a villain on purpose? like cause you wanted to?#between the inferiority complex and his unacknowledged misogyny I especially feel like it would bug him that you are SUCH a better villain#like efficiency wise#like you were literally RAISED in this in the ways he was supposed to be raised in heroism#like self-taught vs traditionally trained type shit#and I think it would bother the hell outta him#you don't even have a quirk but you have a bigger body count than him#what do you MEAN#I hope I get a chance to write that internal struggle it would make good relationship drama
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plush-anon · 4 years
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Happy Halloween Scooby Doo! Review
Muahahhhahahhahahaha! Thanks to the Walmart tradition of stocking movies for sale weeks before the intended release date, I have myself a copy of what claims to be Scooby Doo’s FIRST Halloween adventure!
…in spite of movies like Witch’s Ghost and Goblin King, holiday specials like WNSD’s A Scooby Doo Halloween (which had a haunted Scarecrow too…), BCSD’s EL Bandito (for Dia de los Muertos - obvs not the same, but most companies act like it) and Halloween, The NSDM’s Halloween Hassle at Dracula’s Castle, and the DTV short film Scooby Doo and the Spooky Scarecrow (which, ironically enough, did NOT take the opportunity to feature Dr. Jonathan Crane). 
So let us take a look now at Happy Halloween Scooby Doo! and see whether this film will be a graveyard smash of a treat, or a black licorice bomb of disappointment.
Full review (and SPOILERS TO GO WITH IT) are below the cut in my new review format; if all goes smoothly, I’ll go with this for future Scooby films.
WARNING: This review is very long.
One minor note before we begin: the Special Features actually include BCSD’s Halloween, WNSD’s A Scooby Doo Halloween, and PNSD’s Ghost Who’s Coming to Dinner
...so they were AWARE this was not the first Halloween adventure of the Scooby gang, and yet still use that tag line. Hm. 
Still, kudos for including them - this’ll help boost the reasons to keep this movie, if it turns out to be a real Milk Dud of a movie *ba-dum tish* :D
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The movie starts off rather abruptly, actually - no slow pan over the setting, just WB Animation credit and BOOM, we’ve cut to a Halloween parade and Elvira is talking. 
I’m of a mixed opinion including Elvira on top of having Bill Nye and a Batman Rogue - while she most certainly fits the Scooby aesthetic, it doesn’t feel as grand an impact after her weird little cameo in Return to Zombie Island (ugh) and I’m not sure how well the movie will balance her in wait a minute
wait just a
WAIT A MINUTE
Did - did that parade float skeleton just sing Crystal Cove as the town’s name?
oh no. 
Oh No.
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....also their song is terrible and they should feel terrible.
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Fred: We got him! Banh Mi Shop, second floor!
me: the heck is a Banh Mi Shop? *mild googling noises*
So I guess Jonathan Crane really had a craving for a Vietnamese sandwich before he enacted his Halloween scheme.
...you think he’s a lemongrass chicken type of guy or a BBQ pork guy? It’s always hard to guess at these things, esp when coffee and pumpkin spice aren’t on the table (as per fanon, of course)
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Velma: We have a flawless track record!
So I guess WB is just gonna ignore the past few DTV retcons established in 13 Ghosts and Return to Zombie Island?
I mean that rather defeats the purpose of them existing at all, but fcuk YEAH I can get behind throwing that retcon garbage out of canon!
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And STAY OUT!!
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Shaggy, talking about ghosts being real: I’m like the boy who cried wolf - I keep warning you but like, you won’t believe me until I finally get eaten!
Yet again, Warner Bros makes a wolf reference to Shaggy. Yet again, I am torn asunder between wanting werewolf!Shaggy in a new Scooby property, and fearing for the appearance of werewolf!Shaggy in a new Scooby property. 
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Velma: Point is, being afraid is a waste of time!
Scarecrow, LITERALLY EXPLODING THROUGH A BRICK WALL three buildings away:
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He’s floating through the air and t-posing to assert his dominance 🤣🤣🤣
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Gods bless animation 😁
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Daphne @ Shag and Scoob locking themselves in the van: Are you serial?
Me: wait, SERIAL? *re-reads captions* yup, that says “serial”.  
Is this an editing mistake? I don’t think that works here…unless that’s supposed to be a joke on how they always do this. But then why would that be an irritating surprise, they literally do this EVERY episode 🙄
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Oh hey, Red Herring’s Party Screams truck has Red Herring running out of it
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Could this be a hint to how the story goes? The villain appearing on a literal Red Herring?
Naaaaaah, WB’s not THAT smart
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So if we take @captainbaddecisions​​ crack theory on Jonathan Crane being Shaggy’s uncle seriously, does this mean that Jonathan is using magic to fly, float fear toxin orbs around himself, and making things explode, a la the family trait of Crack Theory A? 
Logically he’s probs using wires or magnets or some shit, but it’s a fun thought to entertain 😁
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Welp, we finally get the opening credits! … with Jonathan Crane smashing through the Mystery Machine’s windshield, set to a slow poppy song straight from the 60s, and spewing the title of the film out in glittery pink mist.
All the while Scooby and Shaggy throw candy at each other, deliberately obtuse to the cloud of fear toxin enveloping their friends and the townsfolk, the steady destruction of the Mystery Machine they’re laying in as multiple cars crash into it and send it spiraling, and the general mayhem and destruction that Scarecrow is causing
Never change, guys, never change
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I just choked on my lemonade
There’s an article plastered to the roof of the Mystery Machine titled “Talking Dog Confounds, Ignites Ethics Debate Over Dog Labor”
ahahahahaha
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Annnnnnnnd there goes the Mystery Machine, tumbling in the air and over the roads with Shaggy and Scooby still inside without seat belts. Will they perish in this horrible road accident? Will Death finally come to claim them at last?
Of course not. This is Shaggy and Scooby we’re talking about - I’m almost positive they can survive anything up to and including a nuclear bomb. This is child’s play to them.
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So they “capture” Scarecrow… by pinning his cape to a tree with crossbow bolts. 
And they do not try to at least tie up his arms or his hands in ANY capacity. 
JUST the cape. 
...you know, Velma, for a team with a “flawless” track record, you guys are making a hecking TON of mistakes in facing against one of Batman’s ROGUES GALLERY, ESPECIALLY with no Batman in sight, good freakin’ grief. 😩
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Yaaaaaaaaas, this Scarecrow design is LUSH
He’s got the lank, the height, the BTAS costume colors, the elongated face with beaky nose and pointed chin and angular cheekbones, the eyebags like Gucci, the furrowed brow… honestly the only thing missing is the more reddish color hair, and even that isn’t mandatory. I love 😍
Not to mention the HOT DAYUM voice he has - low and velvet rough and so godsdamned particular in a way that could either tie in to obscuring a southern accent as in fanon or just as a stringent academic, oh my yes. He’s voiced by someone called Dwight Schultz, who’s most well known for playing Captain ‘Howling Mad’ Murdock in the OG A-Team show, and someone called Reginald Barclay in Star Trek TNG and Voyager, if any of y’all know that character in particular. 
And of course, the first line he says is a delightfully wry “Oh, but I AM getting away with it,” with the sort of smirk that absolutely lends credence to why he’s a threat to Batman, and not some simpering wimp that can be defeated with some crossbow bolts in a tree.
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I think I’m going to enjoy this movie at least somewhat, so long as we get to see him 🥰🥰🥰
(tho on a side note: Daphne why on EARTH are you trying to film Crane saying the meddling kids line? Do you have a video compilation of past villains who’ve done that, and you hope to add his to it? Was your phone damaged when you went up against the Riddler a few DTVs ago and you want a second shot at recording a Gotham Rogue saying it? Bc I don’t think a Gotham Rogue would be too pleased with seeing himself as a Mystery Meme on the Youtubes, you get what I’m saying?)
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Okay, so the floating orb things are explained away as fear toxin bomb drones somehow… despite looking nothing like the other drones and being much smaller with no visible propulsion, while also flying unassisted through and around objects to explode against places once flung…
(tho interesting note, none of them are aimed directly at the crowds, just behind them - odd, that)
But how did he heckin’ FLY at the beginning?
Yeah, they show him wearing wrist-mounted grappling hooks at the end of the intro song sequence, but they are NOWHERE IN SIGHT at the beginning - and I do mean in sight, since he emerges against a backdrop of flames. There was nothing there (see the T-pose above for further evidence), and nothing there when he FLEW THROUGH THE MYSTERY MACHINE’S WINDSHIELD AND FLEW BACK OUT AGAIN. And these things are pale silver, which stands out like crazy against the darker backgrounds, so no hand-wavy ‘they were always being used’ bullcrap we’ve seen in other movies. 
Hmmm *scribbles in notepad* note to self, add notation concerning Crack Theory A on magic!Shaggy to “Uncle Crane” theory files - evidence denotes that Crane is able to fly (or at least hover in mid-air unassisted) for terrorization purposes. May boost strength of CTA by family association, lending credence to magic inheritance along the bloodline...
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“Avocado Toast Generation”? Crane, I honestly don’t know if you really mean that, or if you understand just how much that phrase gets under any Millennial/Gen Z kid’s skin. Having seen multiple variations of your character, it really could swing either way (tho kudos on the dead switch idea - very nice 👍🏻) 
Although this does lead to an interesting stand-off: Fred, upon seeing the town threatened with 3 days worth of fear toxin, immediately moves to let Crane go, while Velma stops him and refuses to consider compromising if it means Crane escapes.  They both look legitimately frustrated at the other for taking the stance they do. 
Fascinating~
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Hmmm
Crane honey, I don’t know if your drones are made of flash paper and hope, or if Scooby and Shaggy are using the reeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaally old candy (the stuff made about ~3 years ago most neighborhoods give out to the teenagers that knock around midnight on Halloween) to shoot them down, but either way you may wish to speak with the manufacturer about this
Then again, this IS Shaggy and Scooby - they probably could’ve spat marshmallows at the drones and brought them down with equal success and explosions 
(and good on them for shooting those down! Atta boy 👍🏻)
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Aw dang it
1. They still have Crane captured and now in handcuffs (despite having… you know… NOT been bound by anything except cross bolts in his curtain cape thing)
2. Dwight Schultz has decided to pitch his voice higher and more nasally than what he has. Hopefully this is more of an incredulous sort of pitch than something that sticks for the rest of the movie, ugh.
Also, I think they’re framing the movie to be more Velma-centric this time around - she’s the one explaining to Crane how they tracked him down, apparently through a piece of fan mail he sent Elvira (is that the only reason she’s there? Also why was Velma examining random pieces of fan mail for toxins, Elvira probs gets hundreds a week irl) and it looks like they’re framing something up on how fear isn’t something you can pretend isn’t there. neat!
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whajit
53rd? 
53rd?!?!
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ONLY 53rd?!?!?!?!
Boooo, Scarecrow’s WAY more popular than that! I call foul
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Okay why is Daphne’s schtick so far to spit laaaaaaame slang after every sentence Velma says
I would rather this not be her schtick
Actually could she go back to filming mystery stuff, bc at least I can pretend it’ll build into the OG Zombie Island Daphne
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Phew, his voice has returned to its low, raspy goodness
also, Crane needs to learn about personal space, good grief
(interesting clue brought up tho - Crane only steals tech that CAN’T leak his toxin, ergo it can’t be tracked until he releases it. Sensible use, given that Batman probs tracks it if it does.)
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Velma: I’m not afraid of you, Crane. Fear is an illogical reaction to an imagined threat. 
Crane:
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Crane: Fearless, then. Intelligent. Proud and stubborn. You remind me very much of the one person in this world I care about. 
uhhhhhh
Yourself? Harley? Edward Nygma? Ichabod the raven? Idk, I’m honestly curious as to where this thread will go 🤔🤔🤔
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Fred, leaning against the Mystery Machine: Guys, it’s gonna be okay. She told me!
O_o
Fred? Honey? Are you sure you weren’t supposed to join Crane in the transport vehicle back to Arkham? 
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OH SWEET JESUS SHAGGY GREW YAOI HANDS
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WHAT THE HECK 
THAT’S WAY MORE UNNERVING THEN YOU GUYS NOT BEING AFRAID ANYMORE
(although the fact that they’re both unsettled by NOT constantly shaking or having their heart racing is honestly kind of heartbreaking. Y’all need therapy, good grief)
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Shaggy and Scooby just chewed up candy (wrapper and all) to make themselves a Halloween costume of… what looks like barfed-up candy (ew)
Before then proceeding to dance so well that everyone around them also starts dancing in a 60s-70s era rainbow light show and giving them candy
I worry for these two sometimes - that kind of power seems to be getting to their head 😬😬😬
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Oh hey, acid green toxic waste is spilling from an 18-wheeler onto the Fear Toxin drones and emitting a purple pink haze that envelops a pumpkin patch! That won’t do anything suspicious at all I bet!
(wait is Poison Ivy going to come into this at some point)
(also major kudos to the music here - very 80s horror synth, I like)
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So the Pumpkins have grown faces, limbs, consciousness, the ability to fly and a lust for human flesh
And they appear to be led by the Pumpkin King of the Pumpkin Patch mentioned in the Charlie Brown Halloween special
He’s not as friendly as I pictured him being, sadly 😕
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Why is this random ass cop coming up to FD&V to say that they’re in over their heads… AFTER the mystery’s been solved?
Like dude, you’re only making yourself suspicious at this point, go home
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Huh, interesting - the gang are being interviewed for a tv news network while they’re considered the town heroes
Why am I getting bad vibes from this…
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Eh, it’s probably nothing
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Velma: {Shaggy and Scooby} are, um… REALLY into the Halloween spirit. 
Shaggy: THIS ISN’T COSPLAY, VELMA!
I’m dying 😂
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Holy Shit
Velma just snapped and went off on Shaggy and Scooby for acting scared and doing nothing to help wrap up the mystery
(even though these guys are the ONLY reason that the gang didn’t have to choose between setting Scarecrow free and poisoning the entire town for 3 days straight, but hey, what do I know - I’m just writing an in-depth reaction post to this movie and taking note of details like this, clearly I know nothing *eye roll*)
Last time I saw Velma critique the guys’ usual mystery solving shenanigans, it was much more low-key and without knowing they were nearby
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But I’m sure that’s just a coincidence
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What the
Bills?
Bills?!?!
Fred just mentioned that fixing the Mystery Machine was going to leave a hefty bill and that they may need to get dishwashing jobs to earn money
Which is more of a job you might expect a high schooler to get on the go and yet
They actually have to pay bills 
How old are they here??!
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wait a tic
THIS is how they introduce Bill Nye?
He just calls up Velma with no explanation other than Velma saying “Oh hey, it’s Bill Nye!”
I just - what?!?!
How do you know him so well that he can just pull up your number and call you, and then geT YOU A NEW FREAKING CAR LIKE
WHAT?!?!?!?
Was there a Scooby episode with him in the past two years where the fcuk did this come from
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Also the car is dressed like Bill Nye
And he can talk to the gang directly as the car
So that he can solve mysteries with them whenever he wants
This… this was not what I was expecting to come about from the Bill Nye cameo 
(alas, poor predictions of being Crane’s roommate, you will not come to pass this day) 😔
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Ooooo, purple haze throbbing on the horizon! That’s always a good sign of things to come! 😀
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 And now Daphne’s… asking Elvira to mentor her fashion wise. And Elvira’s taking her on as her unpaid intern/personal assistant.
Yooo, movie, can you pick a direction and stick with it for Daphne? You’ve gone from her spewing outdated slang to wanting a costume for trick-or-treating, and now this. 
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Welp, now I can say I saw a giant pumpkin dog vore an old woman
I didn’t WANT to see that mind, but I guess I can say it now 😐
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OH SHIT NO
IT TURNED HER INTO A FLYING PUMPKIN SHAPED LIKE HER FACE
ABSOLUTELY UNSETTLING, 0/10 WOULD NOT RECOMMEND
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At least we get a nice scene of Daphne kicking the pumpkins’ collective butt
Something normal
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Elvira: WOW! You’re a regular Mary Sue!
*falls over cackling*
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And now there’s a giant purple fissure opening up in the concrete to swallow the town of Crystal Cove whole 
(good, i whisper softly into the darkness of my living room. Let it fall)
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Man, I feel so bad for this single father right now
He’s gotten wrapped up in all of this nonsense with his daughter, and he is just Distraught at being chased by Jackal Lanterns, having the town collapsing under his feet, and having to gorge jump in his sedan to get away from the worst of it
It’s okay, Mike Dad - we would feel the same way in your shoes
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Hologram Bill Nye is wearing Cat ears and cat whiskers/nose, and is cleaning his hands like a cat cleans its paws
Why was this the movie we found out Bill Nye was a furry
Why Warner Bros 
Why would you inflict this upon us in a Scooby Doo-Scarecrow mystery
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Hey, can Jonathan Crane return now? The movie needs its dignity back. 
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A clue on the whys here - the town was built on top of a MASSIVE lithium deposit, with the talks to mine it being scrapped due to environmental concerns. That’s actually a decent lead in for why some 
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Welp
The Jackal Lanterns just went full Mad Max with the Halloween Parade floats and cars
No, I don’t have any idea why either, just roll with it
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Nice, they confirmed that Fred’s full name is still Frederick Herman Jones XD
Also a great little action sequence with Daphne - while there’s not much movement, they frame the scene dynamically, with some good quick wordplay. Very nice. 
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Velma has a mind palace
Aight
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Velma: Shaggy, I could kiss you!
Oh, to hear this as a child, when I still hardcore shipped Shelma *sigh*
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Oh thank gods we’re going back to Scarecrow again
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Shaggy ate some Scooby Snacks, leapt out of a moving vehicle, and onto the backs of two flying pumpkins that he promptly reined in to fly to Crane’s prison transport
...yet again, I am amazed at the sentences I am led to type for Scooby Doo DTVs
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Ah, how very Hannibal Lector of you, Jon 
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Man, he actually looks very meek in normal clothes - red long-sleeved shirt and grey slacks
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Hmmm
So Crane ISN’T behind the Jackal Lanterns - in fact he’s outright befuddled by them. This means his whole spiel to Velma earlier about both of them being caught in the same trap was… metaphorical? The breakdown doesn’t actually go into WHY he thinks they’re in the same trap - Crane’s whole schtick is tied to accepting fear, not denying it, so why would they be the same?
Either way, someone is using both him and Mystery Inc to do something to Crystal Cove (please be Red Herring, please be Red Herring, please be Red Herring)
Actually, that reference at the beginning really WAS a red herring - they framed it as being Jon the whole time when it wasn’t. Kudos!
Additional kudos to having Jon be seen more out of mask than in - he is a looker, and I aim to look as much as I can ;)
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Annnnd Daphne’s now trying to convince Elvira to switch clothes with her
I don’t get it - how on earth did we get from Daphne trying to find a good costume for trick-or-treating to asking Elvira to switch oh there it is nevermind.
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There is literally a scene where a giant buzzsaw is slicing towards Crane
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and he just
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stares at it
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going “huh, that’s different”
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And I LOVE IT
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And here we have another fascinating scene: Velma going to free Crane from his cell, as Daphne tells her to just leave him to die by pumpkin
I’m wondering if they meant to draw a parallel between the two here - Velma starts by reciting a nursery rhyme, then overcoming her fears in order to release madness to take control. It’s not done very cleanly - mainly bc we barely have any time with Crane in this movie - but I wonder if they meant to insinuate that Crane was like Velma once, where he refused to acknowledge he was afraid, which caused him to lose focus on his initial goals
Idk, ignore my ramblings
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Crane, smirking: I’ll need my personal effects - extenuating circumstances.
Me, fanning myself: I’ll need you to remove yours first
(i am not even kidding, Crane is an absolute DILF in this movie and it flusters me. Stupid sexy animation)
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YAAAAAAAAAAASSSSS
SCARECROW TO THE MOTHERFCUKING RESCUE BABY, SCYTHE AND FCUKING ALL!!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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FCUK YEAH THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING
HE HAS A DANCE LIKE QUALITY WITH SOME OF HIS FIGHTING MOVES
VIOLENT DANCING BRINGS THE GIANT JACKAL LANTERN DOWN BABY
THEN HE BACKFLIPS AND GYMNASTIC SWINGS INTO THE VAN
ROCK IT SCARECROW FCUKING ROCK IT
(minor note here, but the subtitles show Dr. Crane instead of Scarecrow - unsure if that’s more that the movie calls him Dr Crane or if it indicates he’s acting more heroic than villainous)
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GODDAMNIT
THE GIANT PUMPKIN SNUCK VINES INTO THE VAN AND STOLE HIM BACK 
WHEN CRANE WAS... wearing a seatbelt before, but isn’t now.
...
BOOOOO
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Yet again, we find a Scooby movie that attempts character development, but with Velma
Unlike Shaggy’s Showdown however, I’m mixed on how successful it is.
For starters, Velma hasn’t been this cocksure in other DTVs we’ve seen, so it’s a bit odd to see it now. While not 100% out of place - after all, the gang DID capture one of Batman’s Rogues Gallery on their own - it still feels a touch forced. Compare that to Shaggy’s Showdown, where Shaggy has ALWAYS been a coward (one that, in more recent years, writers have had willing to abandon his friends for safety), so the character development there feels more natural. 
The progression of events with Velma actually work somewhat okay - but again, here’s where past DTVs come to bite them in the ass. The past handful have had the gang be wrong, have had them fail, or catch the wrong guy. This makes Velma’s attitude here at odds with the other films, something that sticks more due to a character that’s appeared in the past few films as a minor inconvenience - a Sheriff who keeps telling the gang not to interfere, they’re doing things wrong, etc. If this had been a character who was completely wrong in the past AND SHOWN TO BE WRONG FOR HIS OPINIONS, while the gang never guessed wrong, this would work much better. Unfortunately, it doesn’t, and here we are. 
I think it would have flowed better if Velma’s cockiness came solely from catching Crane on their own. Have a random cop character or reporter or whatever (just not the recurring cop), insinuate that the gang is in too deep with Scarecrow, that he should be handled by the adults or professionals or whatever. Velma could bristle, overcompensate, and THEN fall from her pedestal like we see, reach out to the gang and commiserate over feeling scared, and grow. Again, it’s not too far to reach for, but they handle it poorly; as a result, the outcome feels a little more shoehorned in. 
It’s an honest shame, bc we haven’t had a Velma centered story since Frankencreepy, and we all remember what a hideous fcuking mess THAT was *shudders*. Still, it somewhat gets its point across, I guess.
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Fred why did you rip your shirt off
Actually better question why do you not have nipples
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Awwwwwww
Velma just apologized to Shag and Scoob for snapping at them earlier, and admits how she doesn’t appreciate how much they make Mystery Inc what it is
Also she eats a Scooby Snack with them and admits they taste pretty good
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Huh
Velma’s mind palace is the Mystery Machine driving through space
Also Shaggy and Scooby are able to telepathically follow her in and communicate with her
Literally, they actually followed her into her head telepathically, and show her their memories of things she hasn’t gotten to see tonight (while also possibly enhancing her ability to remember things, given how much DETAIL she captures perfectly of things that she would maybe have glimpsed in a millisecond AT MOST)
...another tally for Crack Theory A of magic! Shaggy and Scooby *scribbles*
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Fred, be very very thankful that there are no people operating those pumpkins in person cause uhhhh
Those traps would be spraying red instead of orange
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Another weird music choice - the gang goes up to fight the Jackal Lanterns, but the music is the same 60s bubble we heard earlier 
Not terribly atmospheric, really
(wouldn’t a Smashing Pumpkins cover of Scooby Doo be more appropriate, or did you guys spend all your money on hiring Elvira and Bill Nye?)
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Dang
Velma just admitted her fears and jumped into the mouth of the Mega Pumpkin, before getting Fred to use the app from earlier to shut it down, revealing it to be a giant drone surrounded by smaller pumpkin drones
This feels… counterintuitive, but I’ll try to explain at the end
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Okay
I’ll admit it
The Whodunnit is actually pretty decent in concept
There was a sprinkling of tidbits that could be assembled for the final conclusion and still make a decent amount of sense, all to find the sheriff doing it 
Only he isn’t a sheriff
He’s a former Tech CEO who was also busted by the gang years ago in a case the Sheriff kept bringing up throughout the movie - due to his prison sentence, he lost more than half his wealth and the opportunity to expand it further with the Crystal Cove Lithium deposits
He was also someone who sold tech to Crane for his fear toxin distribution, where he got the idea to frame him for it
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(tho on a side note, Crane is an absolute dork and a terrible liar - just look at the email he sent XD and that profile pic, my gods)
He deliberately picked at the gang for the past few DTVs (specifically 2: Return to Zombie Island and Curse of the 13th Ghost) to fracture their confidence, undermine them, etc - all so that in one fell swoop, he could retake his fortune, frighten everyone in town away from the mines so they couldn’t interfere, frighten away the gang (while also ruining their reputation as mystery solvers), and take Crane off the docket so he couldn’t identify the CEO when he pretended to be the sheriff
This… is actually a pretty damn good plan, for a Scooby villain. He was patient, manipulative, and clever, learning how best to tie up loose ends and win back what he lost. A clever revenge story that came so close to coming to fruition, and could have honestly been sold convincingly… 
...if it hadn’t been done so much better in Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed. 
Yeeeaaaah, this movie basically lifts the rough framework up from that one - past mystery villain comes back to attack the gang and ruin their reputation (tho this one decides to also make his fortune back and tie up loose ends with former criminal contacts, a la Crane). Gang is embarrassed in front of the news folk, another villain is framed for it (like Old Man Wickles of the Black Knight fame), and the gang must reconcile to foil the villain for good.
Although it also??? Merges elements of Frankencreepy in it?? The movie is focused on Velma, who is struggling to admit when she’s wrong (which ties into her fear, somehow… I’ll think on that point a little) and things purportedly go haywire when she won’t bend. This… isn’t illustrated as well here, since there’s very little direct cause-and-effect from Velma’s actions that would prove this point - that insisting her way is the right, best, and therefore only way to go ends up making things worse.  
As much as I despised Frankencreepy (and I DESPISED IT), it did do that part well - showing that refusing to budge on something can lead to you hurting your friends (literally, in that one), and that admitting you were wrong and need help isn’t the end of the world. 
(that movie also had former villains returning to gain vengeance upon the gang using psychological warfare, hm - may need to go over that one again, unfortunately).
It’s a shame, too -  the basic elements for this plot are all here, they just need to be polished and reworked a bit to make a really fascinating movie. 
------
Anyways, back to the asshat CEO who just… faked being a sheriff. Because white people can get away with that so long as they have the outfit and the car *throws up hands* (the sad part is this is probably something that actually happens)
As he drives away we see a familiar silhouette looming in the cornfields, watching him approach
Velma had Bill Nye on speaker, so he could record the entire confession for the federal officers nearby (who were taking Scarecrow back to Arkham), and track the phone signal to his exact location
And right as his holographic call cuts out, we see the shadow of a Scarecrow looming over him, causing him to scream.
When the feds arrive at his final location, both his body and the money have vanished. The car still sits, engine running, before the crows leering over him from the field vanish into the sky. 
-------
Now that he’s dead, the gang walks and finds themselves at a Halloween party, with friendly faces and good food. The mystery is solved, though the culprit may never be found again. 
Then Daphne admits to NOT trying to steal Elvira’s costume for Halloween, but instead trying to steal Elvira’s identity and replace her. 
Something that she’s apparently nearly gotten away with on past mysteries working with Phillis Diller
*sighs* movie, why couldn’t you just stick to the costume schtick? This is just… so much worse. 
-----
From there, Elvira walks off to wrap things up, reveal the monster face on the back of her head sans wig (which was also a monkey), and start the credits, where we see the gang working to bring the Mystery Machine back to its former glory a la Frankenstein pastiche. 
This movie… this movie is a hot mess, but at least it’s an OKAY hot mess. 
It really does feel like someone started writing a decent Velma-focused movie concerning the Scarecrow and a past Mystery Inc villain interfering, but was bogged down by notes from higher-ups: Wait! Write in Elvira! Also write in Bill Nye! Hey, let’s have a Mad Max car chase with the Jackal Lanterns! And have Daphne obsessed with literally becoming Elvira! Also make reference to things that we’ll insist be explained this way instead of a way that makes sense! Great!
(seriously tho, we never find out who Crane cares about most that reminds him of Velma, what the heck?)
It’s like two or three different scripts were smooshed together without being cleaned up - stuff is said that doesn’t get resolved, the celebrity guests don’t get to breathe much and feel squished together, and the build-up for the villain feels… less impactful, even knowing that he’s been in the past two films. 
It might have worked if he’d been in… let’s say like 5 or 6 DTVs in a row, speaking roles for dissing the gang growing in each (ex start with “Good job kids! But maybe next time, leave it to the professionals, okay?” and growing more bitter from there), but only 2 feels kind of meh. Still, I do appreciate the clues we got to collect together, and they all work in the final breakdown of the scheme - some DTVs can feel like they pull stuff completely out of nowhere, so kudos there. 
I appreciate what they wanted to do with Velma - give her a character development arc similar to Shaggy’s in Shaggy’s Showdown. Unfortunately, it wasn’t set up quite so neatly: they blended her ‘refusal to admit fear’ with her overconfidence that she was always right, and it led to a weird conclusion. To face her fears, she leapt into the Giant Pumpkin, which… proved that she was right all along about it being fake, and that solves things somehow. It doesn’t address how she can get something wrong sometimes, it doesn’t really address what she’s afraid of (which is honestly quite good: she’s afraid of failing in a way that allows bad guys to escape justice and in a way that hurts her friends), it’s just a bit of a mess. Points for aiming the focus the right way (and in a way that DOESN’T sexualize the underage teenage girl, unlike some DTVs cough cough Frankencreepy cough cough), but it’s very very messy how it goes about it. 
The movie actually balanced pretty well for the whole gang - no excessive focus on one leaving the rest in the dust (too much at least - Fred was a touch underdeveloped, but nowhere near as annoying as past iterations have been. Shaggy and Scooby were kind of meh in some places but great in others, while Daphne was just odd. I think they were trying to recapture the BCSD Daphne characterization, but they failed. Still, she did spend some good time kicking ass with the pumpkins, so that was fun.
Now for the Rogue, Jonathan Crane. If you like Crane, this movie gives you: maniacal Scarecrow, calm and creepy Crane, a brief glimpse at fanboy!Crane (he admits in his own awkward way that he’s a fan of Elvira, and later tells her he loves her work - it’s fun), and (best of all for me) a heroic Crane - one who helps the protagonists and ends up kicking ass pretty damn well, brief as it was. And while DILF Crane is always a treat, he feels underutilized in this. In comparison, Scooby Doo/Batman Brave and the Bold really utilized a lot of different aspects of Riddler, to the point he actually does feel pretty menacing by the third act. It’s a shame we don’t quite get that with Crane, but I do love seeing him 1. More out of mask, and 2. Acting as a good guy (in his own way), so he’s enjoyable on the whole. 
I kind of wish that the whole movie was spent more with Crane, but again, the script is a bit of a mess on this part - the fact that he’s not completely screwed over is a goddamn miracle. 
Elvira was… okay. She didn’t have much of a purpose beyond getting the plot started and giving Daphne some hooks to play off of. Bill Nye (abrupt as his introduction was) did provide some necessary elements to the mystery, as well as the tech; he wasn’t too bad by the end. (still a touch bitter we didn’t get ex roommate Nye, but hey, what can you do)
Humor was… mixed. Some good, some meh, but very few long enough to feel painful. Some bits felt extraneous at times, but they did help to build to the conclusion, so points for effort.
At the end of the day though, I’m probably keeping this more for Jonathan Crane than anyone else. It does have a lot of fanfic potential tho 🤔🤔🤔
That’s all from me tonight, folks! Hope you enjoyed my own little breakdown of the movie. 
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lywinis · 5 years
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Writing Meme! B, G, M, N & Z! :3a
This got pretty long, so I’m gonna pop it under a cut.
End of Year Writing Meme
B. Who’s your favorite side-character from something you wrote?
Nooooooo, you can’t make me choose. That’s so mean. Okay, instead of picking my favorite, I’m gonna rank them.
1. Lucy Sheffield (Morgana) – Mum is best. She’s the very epitome of patient and caring mother figure but she still won’t take your shit. Either lie still so you can heal properly or be lashed to the bed, Harry Hart.
2. Thomas Brampton (Lancelot) – he’s a shit and a kinda terrible father figure, but Harry and Lucy love him very much, so he has that going for him, I guess. He’s also a credible mentor, but he’s really kind of shit if you back up and look at the big picture, based on some of the interpersonal lessons he tries to impress upon Harry. But he’s my shit and I love him.
3. Mortimer Gainsborough – bruh I don’t think you understand how much of a hate boner I have for this asshole. He is the fucking worst but he’s also a pretty compelling villain, at least he will be once we have P&M and History Book fully underway.
4. Mickey and Maddy – God, I love them both so much. They’re good kids, Brent.
5. Wesley Emerson Wallace (Tristan) – We intended on making a neutral character that was divided up the middle between loyalty to Chester and respect for Galahad and Merlin, and ended up hurting ourselves in the process lolol
6. The Sons of Liberty – This is more your baby than mine, but I like them and I’m keeping them. They’re all so good, from Mina and her love affair with Champ down to Diani and Teagan being work wives. (And actual wives :D)
7. War – I can’t wait to bring her back into the equation. She’s very compelling to me. She and the Lion are going to be very fun.
G. Where do you think you grew the most this year?
Honestly, I don’t think I’ve grown a whole lot, so much as I have expanded sideways? My vocabulary has improved, and I’ve worked on a couple of turns of phrase that I like a lot. It’s just harder to quantify this year when Bon Dia! was my capstone for the fandom and that was completed in November of 2017. It doesn’t feel like I can top it. I’m honestly not satisfied with how In Bloom is turning out. It went…somewhere I didn’t really want it to and I wrote myself into a corner. For 2019 I’ve determined that I’m going to finish a fic in its entirety, give it an editing pass, probably pass it off to you to beta, and then publish. It means slower writing, but a more polished product, I think.
A couple of rather nasty anons left me wondering if I should even write for the fandom at all. Then I decided that I don’t care and I’m gonna do me. If they don’t like it they can sit down to a steaming plate of dicks and I’ll continue to do what I’m doing.
M. Meta! Have any meta about a story you’re dying to throw out there?
Hahahahahahaha I have SO MUCH meta. Most of it is spoilery for P&M and I really feel like a lot of people who read our stuff would chew off an arm to get at our Discord logs, just for a chance to read through the shit we spitball at each other.
N. Anything you were planning to write that never got written?
Oh, lord, yes, lots. There was that Spies and Prejudice thing in Regency AU I was planning on doing, but I lost the thread for it and just never completed it. There’s a couple of things I want to take a whack at – one of them is a one-shot that isn’t even for Kingsman, it’s a capstone ‘what happens after’ for the movie Hardcore Henry.
Z. If you could choose one work and immediately finish it, what would it be? How would you end it?
I know a lot of people probably expect me to say Douleur La Exquise, but honestly, I’d have to say Poison the Wellspring. It’s pretty deep in my archives, two chapters written of Phil set up to be a pawn in Loki’s attempt at destroying the Avengers from the inside. It was meant to read like a thriller, and I think I was far more ambitious than I am now when I started it. I had a gameplan to bring Thanos into it, way back in the dark ages of 2012, and I meant to bring in all these Marvel IPs that no one would have recognized, like Doctor Strange. With a lot of the choices Marvel has made, I’ve lost a lot of interest in writing it as a whole, but I’d still like to take another whack at it, next year.
If I could finish it right now, it would be thirty chapters of slow burn Capsicoul topped off with Phil’s rising paranoia and urging from Loki to push more of the Avenger’s secrets into his waiting hands. Soon, however, he stops hearing Loki and starts hearing a far more compelling voice, one with more strength of will and conviction in it. He starts hearing Thanos and the last vestiges of Phil that remains the loyal man he was before Loki’s capture rally together and provide him with a single moment of clarity. Deep in the watches of the night, he leaves his bed in the Tower and goes to the gymnasium. Tony’s built them a pool for laps, and Phil sinks himself to the bottom to drown himself – only to be saved by Steve. He can’t explain why he’s done this, thanks to the geas placed by Loki, so he’s pushed into therapy.
Soon, however, it becomes clear when Thanos arrives on earth looking for the stones, and Phil basically hands over the Avengers compound to him on a silver platter, admonishing Steve that he should have let him drown. Thanos, amused at the anguish this causes, imbues Phil with enough power to incapacitate the Avengers himself. It’s with a sense of horror that Phil complies, as all the team realizes he’s been planning this from the start – and Phil knows all their weaknesses, because that’s what he’s trained to know.
Thanos gains the gauntlet and nearly cripples the Avengers, until the geas, its purpose fulfilled, breaks – because Loki is nothing if not clever, and he placed that failsafe long before Thanos took over Phil’s thoughts and actions. Phil manages to take the gauntlet in a moment Thanos’s guard is down, when he’s communing with Death, and he banishes Thanos. He’s so tired, his will drawn so thin, he can’t muster the willpower to kill him, only bind him elsewhere. He brings back the Avengers, and then collapses, shattering the gauntlet into pieces and scattering them across the universes. The stones remain, for the Avengers to protect.
When Phil wakes up, it’s with Steve hovering over him in the hospital. Phil asks him where they stand, now that everything has come to light. He betrayed them all, perhaps against his will, but he didn’t fight near hard enough to break free. Even his relationship, while it had made him happy, was built on lies. He doesn’t know how or why Steve would still trust him, or even want to look at him.
Steve just tells him that he’s got a long road to rebuild that trust, and maybe they should wait before resuming what they had – even still, it won’t ever be the same. But Steve? Steve loves Phil, and knows that being compelled to do something isn’t the same as choosing to do it of one’s own free will. Steve, if Phil will have him, will be waiting for Phil to be ready. And if he never is, that’s all right, but they don’t have to talk about it now. Phil should get better, and should take some time just to be himself, since he hasn’t been able to do that in a long time. It ends on a bittersweet note, but there’s a mutual understanding between them that it isn’t the end, it’s more of a tabula rasa for them – the slate wiped clean, and they have to relearn about themselves and each other once again. But both of them are willing to put the work in.
That’s what makes it a relationship. Because it takes work. It takes wanting to see the other person happy, to see them grow and be complete in their own way, with or without you. Tribulations and pain do come, but they also go, and taking someone’s hand and promising that you’ll be there for them, well. For me, it doesn’t really change. And it never will.
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the-ghost-writers · 6 years
Text
Monster BF headcanons
Cause why not? But really it’s because some peeps on discord ( @punkpoppunkpop @aurumdragonfly and a few others) wanted to know what kinda boyfriend their favorite monsters would be, and I was happy to oblige.
Orc 
You met him by walking past while he was training and you stopped to watch.
With an audience, he felt the need to really show off and go hard to show just how strong he is.
He sauntered up to you expecting you to be smitten. 
You were, but you caught him off guard with your praise from calling him cute.
 He got flustered, which made him stutter, which made him even more flustered. 
At least once a day you remind him of how much of a dork he was when yall first met. 
He hushes you by wrapping you up in a bear hug where he squeezes just tight enough to keep you from speaking. 
He really likes carrying you around.
Play with his beard and he'll melt. 
Loads more under the cut. (Shoot an ask if you want a headcanon of a species that isn’t listed)
Wyvern 
You originally met because he was hunting you but then he got so caught up in talking with you that he forgot he was hungry.
Regularly takes you on flying trips because he likes flying and likes spending time with you, so doing both is amazing to him.
Has no arms so he uses his neck to wrap around and "hug" you.
Tends to perch (like a bird) on anything and everything.
Gets overexcited and tackles you to the ground if you've been apart.
Immediately apologizes.
Loves to smother you with kisses at a rapid-fire pace.
Curls around and tucks you under his wing when it's time for bed.
Cuthulu 
You just wanted to swim in the ocean when you happen to cut yourself and managed to bleed in just the wrong or right spot to summon him. 
Horrifying cause he's over 20 stories tall and doesn't like shrinking down. 
Still shrinks down so he can be held by you when he's feeling touched starved.
Has trouble speaking any human language so he uses his hands for communication.
Sometimes forgets that you need air to breathe and his kisses leave you light headed.
Most people go mad if they look into his eyes, so do you but you fall mad in love.
Knows people are afraid of him, but he wants to be with you so he sneaks around to steal you away for a trip to the ocean floor (don't worry, he has a way to let you breathe.) 
His Earth home is a massive cave littered with glittering crystals. 
Kobold 
He’s absolutely teeny, not to mention tiny, but he acts like he's the biggest man around. 
Shout everything without realizing it. 
He's just really energetic. 
Feels the need to defend your "honor" from everything. 
Sometimes he'll try to fight someone for just looking at you. 
You have to stop him cause he really isn't a fighter. 
Despite his mishaps, he loves you more than anything. 
When you asked why he “protects” you so much, he said kobolds always protect their treasure. 
Seriously, he's like waist high. 
Really good at fixing things tho, not a single door in your house squeaks and he fixed you A/C in under an hour.
Robot 
Large and in charge. 
Literally, he's 8 feet and built with the purpose of being a security guard. 
After his day job is over, he goes and spends the rest of his time with you. 
Doesn't need sleep, just to recharge, so if he's plugged in then he can stay up with you all night. 
Or really until you fall asleep
To sleep in bed with you, you two installed a special charging station in your bedroom that use cords to charge him and allow him to lay in bed with you. 
The cords are on his back so he's always the big spoon.
A very, very big spoon. 
Constantly upgrading his body to be more comfortable for you. 
His latest upgrade was heating plates for when you're cuddling together. 
Sometimes speaks in robot which is apparently a thing they don’t like doing in front of humans and it’s a whole lotta beeps and whirrs before he remembers who he's talking to and tries again.
Minotaur 
The biggest grump you know. 
Although he's notably less grumpy with you than he is with others.
A scowl is always on his face but sometimes he forces it to keep up his image.
"What do you mean I need new clothes? My loincloth only has three tears in it." 
Excellent sense of direction. 
Really likes tight spaces.
Won't admit that he likes it when you're sitting on his shoulders. 
Run your fingers through his leg fur and it'll bristle. 
Hates the cold and will shamelessly use you as a personal heater. 
Mummy 
Actually woke up in a museum, you were the only one around at a time.
At an utter loss of why he's not in the afterlife.
He followed you home thinking it was a path to the beyond.
Was not happy when he learned it wasn't.
Not all too concerned because he thinks he'll get there eventually.
Calmed down but didn't leave your home because he had nowhere else to go.
Still thinks he's in Egypt and that only a few years have passed since his death. 
Won’t tell you who he was in life because he knows that it bugs you that you don’t know who he was.
Doesn't like seeing what's under his wraps but will show you if asked. 
After a while, he learns he has a bit of magic and can levitate things. 
Levitates you towards him and wraps you up (He doesn't get the joke) in his arms so he has something to hold. 
Doesn't actually realize he's falling for you until months later when you're already practically a couple. 
Thinks technology is magic even a year has passed since he woke up and you’ve explained what a smartphone is seven times now. 
Kaiju 
Walks around on four legs and is as big as a 15 story building. 
Regularly gets in fights with other kaiju, wins every other one.
Will come home (to your home, his is the ocean) victorious and start gloating about how amazing he is until you join in.
It’s because he adores your praise. 
If he lost, he'll be whimpering for you to take care of him (can't do much other than kiss it better but he has regeneration.) 
You're starting to wonder if he gets in so many fights so you'll give him attention. 
Speaks broken English and his voice is gravely. 
Lays on top of you if you try to leave when he doesn't want you to. 
Doesn't care that your work won't take "a giant kaiju sat on me" as an excuse for being late. 
Eastern Dragon 
"Respect your elders" any time you disagree with him in the slightest. 
Always floating around, hasn't touched the ground or been still in 50 years. 
Stubby arms.
He's sensitive about it. 
Twirls his mustache and cackles like a villain when he's being a little shit. 
"I'm the most humble person I know." 
Sometimes he'll take you up in the air and hold you in his coils to get you alone. 
Changes size a lot, sometimes he's the size of a train and sometimes he's the size of a shoelace. 
Gives dumb people sass but has yet to sass you. 
Werewolf 
Sometimes you wonder if he's a werewolf or a weregolden retriever. 
Always eating but never gains weight. (A nice combination of a good metabolism and a daily shape-shifting transformation that burns through thousands of calories.)
Snerks when someone starts talking about an “Alpha” werewolf.
Sheds like a bitch. (He DOES get the joke) 
His kisses are just lots of face licks.
Will start gnawing on your leg/arm if you ignore him too much. 
If you're not physically touching him to some extent he gets upset.
Super fluffy and surprisingly muscular.
Prefers his meats raw. 
Doesn't like fish. 
At all. 
An utter slut for head scritches.
Skeleton 
A total jokester.
Feels weird being naked. 
Will be naked for a prank tho. 
Skeletor is his idol.
Part-time job at the high school science lab. 
Knows every vine and meme there is.
2spooky4u 
Uses his bones to play songs. 
Don't call him sans. 
Don't ask him for a hand either, he'll toss his detached hand to you. 
"I've got a boner" 
"Rattles me bones!" 
Dressed up as Jack Skellington for Halloween. 
Deathclaw 
Originally tried to kill you but you were so pitiful cute that he stopped.
Once he deemed that you’re not a threat, he started ignoring you. 
Because your home is so close to his, his started seeing you as a part of his territory.
Eventually stopped being agitated by you and grew comfortable enough to not be on guard around you.
Rescued you from a bandit raid once but wouldn’t let you go home after, took you to his home.
It’s your new home, he’s your new roommate. 
Always wants you in his sight, he’ll follow you if you leave and corral you back to his cave if you wander too far off. 
Intelligent but doesn’t speak a lick of English, although has come to learn and react to a few key phrases “Hi, Love you, Fuck.”
That last one has led to a few problems when you shouted it in pain and he misinterpreted it. 
If he spends enough time outside in the day, he’ll glow in the dark in his cave. 
It used to make you sick but you grew used to it you might have radiation poisoning. 
He doesn’t care for his glowing body parts until he noticed your interest in him grows when he glows. 
Allows you to freely explore him. 
“Laughs” when you touch his teeth (he doesn’t understand why you’re fascinated by them but they’re so big that you just have to touch.) 
Wyvern 2.0 
So liked that he got an encore
When he’s excited, he wags his tail but that makes him lose balance, so sometimes he’ll fall over when he first sees you. 
The lack of arms means he uses his head to nudge everything, and his tongue when it’s something delicate to handle. 
Definitely a morning person. 
He always wakes up before the sun rises, but he won’t try to leave the bed/nest until you’re up as well.
While you sleep, and especially while he’s waiting for you to wake up, he combs his wing tips along your soft spots because he likes the face you make when you’re comfortable. 
Can not be faulted being too big, you’re just too small. 
Really likes emeralds for some reason, he’s not sure why. 
When you lie next to him, you can hear his heartbeat and how it beats faster from you being near.
Trent 
A self-appointed guardian of the forest. 
Said forest is in your backyard. 
Notices you taking care of plants and thinks of you as a friend. 
Shocked when he reveals himself and you get excited. 
He expected you to be scared, not bouncing with excitement. 
Indulges you in your request to know more about him and shows all he can do, from manipulating plants to lifting boulders. 
Turns smug when you’re in awe of his body but is humbled from how soft you are and how much he likes touching you. 
Compares you to that of a flower and himself as a tree.
After that day, he starts inviting you to tea using the herbs he grows and shows off his pretty flowers. 
Gives you a flower crown that’s enchanted to never wilt. 
Fascinated by the glass objects in your house. 
Feels guilty for tracking dirt into your house.
Gryphon 
You’ve actually known him since he was a child because you two grew up together. 
Separate homes tho, his family lived in a forest beside your family’s home.
You both know the ins and outs of each other what with you two being best friends.
Puberty treated him very well and he grew to be very strong. 
In time, the aftermath of your wrestling sessions (if you win it’s only because he LET you win) went from the two of you finding food to laying together and watching the sky. 
He can’t speak aside from squawking, so you have to carry the conversations along. 
You can typically ride on his back to get to places. 
He bumps his beak against your head in his way of giving kisses. 
Belly rubs slay him. 
Taurus Demon 
Very open about his sexuality. 
Also one of the bigger demons around so he doesn’t worry about much. 
Spends his time waiting for the chosen undead laying around with you. 
Likes it when you’re laying on top or against him cause it lets him play with you.
Happy rumbles when he sees you.
“Look at my boyfriend! He’s so fucking small!” 
Really wants to train you to fight.
Lays in a bed of fire with you on top of him, his body protecting you from the heat.
Really blushy if he ever forgets his loincloth. 
Doesn’t realize that shouting at people to not look will only draw their attention.
Capra demon 
Tall but feels short for a demon. 
Actually a really good dancer (he pretends he’s using his swords.) 
Dog person. 
Likes to get into “friendly” competitions with you.
He’ll try to let you win but he’s too competitive. 
Wants to explore the world with you.
Thinks magic is really cool. 
Fuck shields tho. 
Really likes being the little spoon. 
Mothman 
You two met underneath a flickering street lamp.
Neither of you actually noticed each other until he bumped into you. 
You screamed, he fluttered his wings. 
When you both calmed down, he gave you a curious look cause he expected you to run. 
He’s really tall and you have crane your neck to see his face, but all you see are two red eyes. 
He wanders off and something in the back of your head tells you to follow. 
He brings you to a small opening in a forest where fireflies float about. 
He plops down and you sit beside him. 
He opens up fast and wraps an arm/wing around you as you both watch the show the bugs put on for you. 
You do this every week without ever saying a word. 
Last time you two met, he planted a kiss on your forehead and you two fell asleep on the ground, laying together. 
He soft.
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jolteonjordansh · 7 years
Text
Thoughts on “The Redemption”
Let’s get this over with.
Remember how I wasn’t very interested in the first episode “The Adventure” and how I felt it didn’t really do anything? Remember how I said “The Old Chateau” was a waste of space and that it was my least favorite episode?
Chuck that all out the window. Because this episode managed to outdo both of those in terms of purpose and entertainment.
I’ll be upfront now: If you don’t know already, I hold a lot against XY’s story, so I am honestly biased here and have been pretty biased when talking about the XY episodes of Generations. To give myself credit, I applauded what “The Beauty Eternal” did right. Additionally, despite some of its flaws, I still really liked “The Investigation” as I really liked XY’s postgame. “The Redemption” unfortunately pretty much takes the elements of XY’s story that upset me the most for an episode.
And I say “takes” in a very literal sense. This episode does nothing to differentiate itself from the original source material other than moving AZ’s plot dump from one point of the story to another. And even this is done even worse than in the games. As much as the exposition dump of AZ’s past bothers me, it makes sense that AZ is retelling it because it’s his story (insert “This is my story” joke here) and it’s from 3,000 years ago. No one else is going to know of it or remember it in such detail. Here, it’s just some standard mother telling this tale to her daughter--or rather, the daughter recollecting her mother telling her said tale--as if it’s an everyday bedtime story. Also, the daughter looks eerily like Serena, as if this episode needed to remind me of other awful elements that XY provided.
The fact that this episode does nothing new is probably the worst thing about it. You are not missing out on anything by skipping this episode, and you gain nothing from watching it. They do nothing new with AZ and his story when there is so much more that could be done with it. It is literally taken straight from the game, down to the style of the flashback. And considering this miniseries is advertised to be about “discovering the untold stories” of Pokémon, I expected something original out of this.
Unless I missed something, each episode did something to try to differentiate itself from the original source material. Team Rocket was actually investigated by Looker. We got different perspectives of Team Magma’s pursuit for Groudon and the awakening of Primal Kyogre. There was closure given on Cyrus’ fate of staying in the Distortion World forever (even if I felt the way it was handled was out of character, it at least did something different). The N and Ghetsis confrontation from B2W2 actually had Hilbert return to the fight with Zekrom. All of these climactic events did something new or had a different take of how these stories happened. None of that happens in “The Redemption”. This is no different from either playing the game yourself or hell, watching a Let’s Play. Ooh wait, the animation is a little better and there’s voice acting! Wowee!
Before I continue down ramble road, let me honestly critique the other elements of this episode. The animation is alright, and it does mimic the style of AZ’s exposition in the game pretty well. But... this is kind of a problem in and of itself. While I get it’s a stylistic choice and respect how closely they follow it, it’s because of this that a lot of the animation ends up looking really choppy. Again, I understand it’s a stylistic choice, but after seeing seventeen other episodes of this series with overall really good animation, it’s... kind of disappointing to have the last episode amount to this for about 2/3rds of its duration.
The voice acting is fine and standard. The mother and daughter barely say anything (except for the mother being the storyteller here) so there’s not a lot for me to critique on. Laura Post sounds like a mom. The voice actor of the daughter sounds like a little girl. For Keith Silverstein... I really don’t know whether to say he’s wasted on AZ or not. He voice acts fine as usual. His voice works. But Keith Silverstein is such a good actor and AZ is such a... boring and unfulfilling character. I mean, I’m glad AZ has a good actor rather than a really terrible one, but I just feel so mixed on the whole thing. I think literally the only highlight of this short is getting to hear “It’s been 3,000 years” voiced. But honestly? It’s not because the line has emotional impact like it’s supposed to. It’s because it became borderline meme-status so it’s hilarious to hear it spoken outloud so professionally.
The music is fine; again, nothing is really wrong with it. But it honestly doesn’t sound much different from the compositions in the games. Maybe it’s just because I really haven’t played XY enough or listened to its soundtrack a lot, but I just kind of know songs as “Oh, this is the flashback song” and “Oh, this is that song that plays when Floette comes back”. You know, this could have easily called for an actual officially voiced version of Kiseki, but I guess the episode still couldn’t be bothered to do anything original like that.
I really can’t comment on the story much at all other than saying it’s exactly like it is in the games. Nothing is different and nothing new is done when Generations has mostly done a good job with that in other episodes. I’m not sure if executive meddling was done and the production team were told to change nothing about AZ’s backstory or take any liberties with it, but it’s such a shame that it’s left that way. You know how they could have made this interesting? If this whole backstory AZ was actually shown from his perspective, not by yet another storytime session. It would have not only made the episode a lot more personal, but could have actually made AZ easier to empathize with. I can’t say I would have actually done so, but I would have appreciated the effort in them trying. You know the saying “Show, don’t tell”? That’s extremely applicable here.
But honestly, there’s something else that bothers me about this episode too. And it’s not even just this episode, but about XY as a whole and AZ as a character. This episode is titled “The Redemption”, and AZ has always been presented as a character I should feel sorry for. Can someone answer me, honestly, why I should feel sorry for him? And in all seriousness, what has he really done to redeem himself? He didn’t do anything to stop Lysandre from using the Ultimate Weapon that he created. If anything, he helped him get away with it. He hasn’t done anything in his 3,000 years of wandering around to try to make up for the thousands of lives he took away and all of the misery he caused. I guess we could argue he’s dealt with the burden of having eternal life for actual centuries, but he doesn’t even do anything with all of that time and we don’t get to see how he suffers in that time to really sympathize for him either. He has. Just. Been. Moping around. For 3,000 years. And he didn’t do anything in-game or in this episode to redeem himself. All he has done is feel sorry for himself in those 3,000 years. He has a single battle with Calem, continues feeling sorry for himself even afterwards, and then Floette just comes back. There’s no redemption going on here, and yet he still gets exactly what he wanted. I know I poked fun at “The Beauty Eternal”’s title, but this one is practically a flat-out lie.
I’ve had a discussion with friends before, and you know what? As terrible as Lysandre is, AZ has a vibe of a villain himself. He killed thousands for one Pokémon he cared about, not thinking of how it would make others or even Floette feel. And then when someone else arrives to basically do the same thing he did (and it’s supposedly one of his blood relatives, no less), he lets them get away with it. He does nothing to prevent it from happening. It’s clearly unintentional, but it still makes him out to be a really terrible person, and not in the “a terrible person makes a good character” way.
I know a lot of these thoughts lies in with my thoughts about XY as a whole, but part of that problem lies in with the episode carrying over a lot of XY’s flaws and doing nothing new with them. I know I sound like a broken record by now, but my opinion of the original material isn’t going to change just by putting it in the form of animation, and animation that does little to do something interesting no less. So naturally, my opinion of what was in the game is going to transfer here since that’s all that was brought in.
Whereas my complaint with “The Investigation” is that it doesn’t inform the audience enough, the problem with “The Redemption” is that it ironically informs too much. It spends all of its time recapping on what happened in the games and not enough doing its own thing. And that’s a pretty bizarre mistake to make.
That’s about as much as I have to say about “The Redemption”, but how do I feel about Pokémon Generations as a whole? It unfortunately suffers drawbacks in what it is: a miniseries consisting of episodes that are five minutes in length at most. Because of that, it doesn’t get to focus on things that Pokémon is known for, like Pokémon battles, raising and some of the Pokémon themselves. But at the same time I get that it’s meant to be story-focused. For what it is, I honestly think it’s good. Maybe not great, but good. If TPCi could actually invest in a full-blown series in this style with more screentime, a continuous, focused story and have more action, I think tons of people would eat it up and love it. But unfortunately, I think little things like Pokémon Generations and Pokémon Origins are as much as we’ll ever get of that kind of material.
It honestly feels like Pokémon Generations is a response to people’s reactions to Pokémon Origins. A lot of people liked it, but wanted more and for it to cover more generations. TPCi basically said “Okay, have more... in the span of five minute episodes.” It kinda sucks, but I’ll take Pokémon Generations for what it is: It’s pure fanservice. It’s not really anything of a lot of substance. But you know what? I enjoyed it for that. I came in watching knowing it would basically be that. I just really, really wish we could get this kind of thing on a bigger scope and with even greater care put into it. Well, we can all dream a little, can’t we?
It was hard to finish this off, especially towards the end, but I’m glad I’m done talking about this for now. If such a thing like Generations ever happens again, I’d love to cover it like this once more. But that seems like a pretty big if for now. I only wish Generations could have ended on a way more positive note for me, but... That’s just how it is. We all have opinions and this is just mine. And if you made it this far, I hope you got some enjoyment out of reading mine.
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