#tw: menti9n 9f s9licitati9n

[poorlydrawnkankri]

Kankri, what do you prefer, a death threat or someone making advances on you?

I am already dead, I died a millennia's w9rth 9f m99ns ag9 S9 t9 make such a threat w9uld mean n9thing unless made 6y the L9rd E. himself.

H9WEVER I D9 N9T C9ND9NE DEATH THREATS, if y9u c9nduct such 6ehavi9rs I will 9nly perceive y9u with gander6ul6s full 9f disapp9intment, 6ut I rather s9me9ne make an empty threat than s9licited me despite the fact I am celi6ate.

#tw: death threats #tw: menti9n 9f s9licitati9n #tw: menti9n 9f unwanted advances #celi6acy #inquiry #kankri vantas

[pesterloglog]

Porrim Maryam, Kankri Vantas, Karkat Vantas

Act 6, page 5263

PORRIM: Kanny, leave this po+o+r kid alo+ne.

KANKRI: I'd appreciate it if y9u w9uldn't call me that. We've talked a69ut this. That's what y9u call a wiggler. D9 I l99k like a wiggler t9 y9u, P9rrim? N9, I d9n't. It's 6een three sweeps, plus eternity, f9r, excuse me, "fuck's" sake. I think we can safely retire that particular term 9f "endearment". Call me anything 6ut that, even my 9ther nickname. I'm actually 9k with that 9ne.

#micr9aggressi9ns #n9 wait #MACR9agressi9ns m9re like

PORRIM: I'm no+t calling yo+u Insufferable, Kanny. Well, no+t unless I'm using it as an actual adjective.

#And even then, pro+bably no+t to+ yo+ur face.

PORRIM: Well...

#No+t o+ften I mean.

KANKRI: It w9uld 6e nice if y9u'd at least use my pr9per name in fr9nt 9f my studi9us y9ung Alternian descendant. It really kind 9f er9des my credi6ility, and I d9n't need that in the pr9ximity 9f a fresh faced y9ungster wh9 clearly thirsts f9r kn9wledge. Why w9uld y9u want t9 sa69tage a fine y9ung man's educati9n like that?

#Fresh #Faced #Y9ungster #Kn9wledge thirst

PORRIM: Ro+lling my eyes here.

PORRIM: Can yo+u see? Do+ yo+u want me to+ light them up fo+r yo+u?

KANKRI: N9, 6ut thanks f9r 9ffering. C9uld y9u g9 r9ll them 9ver there? Thank y9u. N9w where was I.

#H9w d9 y9u even r9ll eyes with9ut pupils?

PORRIM: I do+n't think he cares.

PORRIM: Hey, there. Karkat? If yo+u do+n't mind my asking... are yo+u even remo+tely interested in the lo+af supplement this guy's serving?

KARKAT:

PORRIM: Go+tcha. Yo+u just said all yo+u needed to+ say.

PORRIM: Yo+u kno+w, yo+u are actually very cute.

PORRIM: That girl who+'s been wandering aro+und in the drago+n suit is a very lucky lady.

KANKRI: 9k, w9nderful. That c9nversati9n just came t9 an end.

KANKRI: P9rrim, please d9n't hit 9n my re699ted kid ancest9r-descendant. It's really weird. N9t t9 menti9n, he l99ks exactly like me? I mean, kind 9f 96vi9usly? S9 when y9u're hitting 9n him, it's like y9u're hitting 9n me at the exact same time, which like I said. It's weird.

#It's weird

KANKRI: N9t t9 get int9 all this again, 6ut the th9ught 9f dating y9u... it's just a strange and vaguely 9ffputting idea. N9 9ffense. It alm9st makes me understand at a visceral level the 6izarre human anathema 9f incest, which is s9mething I can't really explain. I'm just saying.

#Trigger warning #Incest #Anathemas #Viscerality #Vaguely #9ffputting

PORRIM: (Very deep sigh.)

#Oh my Go+d.

KANKRI: I'm S9RRY, 9k? I'm s9rry that I am, perhaps literally, the 9nly 9ne n9t t9 ever fall prey t9 y9ur tireless 9mnidirecti9nal s9licitati9ns, 9r t9 get swept up in 9ne 9f y9ur innumera6le flushed 9r caligin9us flings. I happened t9 always prefer y9u as a friend, and in any case, I always preferred t9 lead a relatively chaste existence, as it keeps me f9cused 9n fighting 9n 6ehalf 9f truly imp9rtant pr96lems. Alth9ugh staying "relatively" chaste t9 y9u I supp9se is n9t saying much.

PORRIM: ...

#Hey.

KANKRI: 9nce again, I ap9l9gize. I've 6lundered int9 the pr96lematic territ9ry 9f vacillati9n shaming, thus 9pening the fl99dgates t9 the myriad ways 9ne may 6e disadvantaged up9n 6y its staggering shame radius. I f9rg9t t9 check my piety privilege, and here we are. I was g9ing t9 c9ver this t9pic in a much later chapter 9f my lecture, 6ut we've g9tten 6adly derailed here.

#TW #Derailment #Train wrecks #Ch99 ch99 catastr9phes

KANKRI: Karkat, I'm s9rry f9r this interrupti9n. I pr9mise I'll get 6ack t9 my critical lecture as s99n as this pr9miscu9us 6usy69dy leaves us in peace.

#Village tw9 wheel device

KARKAT:

PORRIM: Yes, critical lecture. I'm sure.

PORRIM: And am I right in being just as sure yo+u are assiduo+usly deco+nstructing every co+nceivable, hypo+thetical fo+rm o+f injustice no+ matter ho+w o+bscure, except tho+se that I happen to+ think are kind o+f impo+rtant?

#Yes

KANKRI: N9. Just, n9, P9rrim. We're n9t d9ing this.

#N9

KANKRI: I am n9t g9ing t9 p9llute Karkat's utterly imperative crash c9urse, in which he is intr9duced t9 the A6S9LUTE 6ASICS, 6y indulging in y9ur pet issues.

PORRIM: Yes, ho+w dreadful it wo+uld be fo+r yo+ur sixty nine millio+n wo+rd essay to+ get bo+gged do+wn by even the faintest reference to+ the ro+les o+f gender in Befo+ran and Alternian civilizatio+n.

#"HUMAN SARCASM"

KANKRI: L99k, it's n9t that I'm insensitive t9 y9ur c9ncerns 9n that t9pic. I'm interested t9 discuss them with y9u 9n an academic, primarily the9retical level.

PORRIM: Theo+retical?

#...

KANKRI: I just think there is inherent danger in muddying the waters 9f disc9urse 6y intr9ducing s9cial issues which are suspect at 6est, thus c9nsuming crucial res9urces fr9m the limited cache 9f rhet9ric which pr9pels these narratives. And furtherm9re, 9ne c9uld argue it's m9re than a little pr96lematic, 9ffensive even, f9r y9u t9 6e appr9priating the lexic9n 9f sensitivity used t9 advance awareness 9f maj9r issues, thus reducing it t9 the level 6uzzspeak and pseud9science. It makes it m9re difficult f9r th9se 9f us wh9 are genuinely f9cused 9n p9sitive change t9 6e taken seri9usly, that's all.

PORRIM: Appro+priating??

#That's no+t #what that even #means?

PORRIM: PSEUDOSCIENCE???

#Yo+u did no+t just...

KANKRI: I'm s9rry, I just d9n't think there's much there. We aren't like humans, wh9se species 6izarrely en9ugh includes highly specialized r9les f9r 69th sexes in the pr9cess 9f repr9ducti9n, and s9 this naturally had s9cial ramificati9ns f9r the way their civilizati9n ev9lved. 6ut that's n9t h9w it w9rks f9r us, s9 I fail t9 see h9w gender fact9rs int9 the discussi9n in a way that can 6e effectively and rati9nally pr96lematized. Where is the r99m f9r unexamined privilege in the dich9t9my? I d9n't see it. And appr9priating the talking p9ints and awareness-raising tactics f9r du6i9us issues like this is, frankly, fr9wned up9n, t9 put it p9litely. Such appr9priative gestures 9nly serve t9 marginalize and invalidate th9se su6ject t9 seri9us, real life struggles and 9ppressi9n, and I guess I'm a little disapp9inted t9 see y9u 6eing s9 6lithely and inappr9priately appr9priat9ry.

#Fr9wned up9n #Fr9wns all ar9und #Welc9me t9 fr9wn t9wn

PORRIM: Kanny, I'm starting to+ feel just a little bit triggered by all this "appro+priatio+n" bullshit.

#Trigger warning: #Abo+ut to+ kick yo+ur tall pantsed ass

KANKRI: 9h! My sincere ap9l9gies. I sh9uld have d9ne a 6etter j96 tagging my statements, 6ut f9r future reference, it's helpful t9 alert y9ur c9nversati9nal partners t9 y9ur triggers well in advance. Sh9uld I g9 fetch y9ur m9irail t9 help settle y9u d9wn? And if s9, wh9 exactly w9uld 6e filling that quadrant t9day?

#It's the may9r, right? #G9tta 6e the may9r

PORRIM: Alright. Obvio+usly yo+u're in o+ne o+f yo+ur bratty mo+o+ds. I'm go+ne.

KANKRI: D9n't 6e like that. Really, we can talk a69ut whatever y9u like later, and I'll 6e really sympathetic, I pr9mise. Just n9t ar9und my pupil while he is still learning.

KANKRI: 9r... my descendant. What did I say? Haha. Karkat, I mean. Anyway, Karkat, again I ap9l9gize f9r that.

#N9w where was I?

KARKAT:

#homestuck #porrim maryam #kankri vantas #karkat vantas #homestuck act 6 #page 5263 #homestuck act 6 act 3 #openbound