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#top 10 moments that make me despise Xander)
pzyii · 6 months
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Y'all ever think about that the like last conversation Buffy and willow had irl in s2 before Buffy ran away was Buffy saying willow was their last hope.
And that the last conversation they had, just the 2 of them, in S5 before Buffy died was Buffy saying willow was her big gun
Yeah.... Me neither (lying)
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MTVS Epic Rewatch #198
BTVS 7x14 First Date
Stray thoughts
1) I really don’t think Snyder would’ve gotten such a huge… oh, wait. Inferiority complex. Yep. He totally would.
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2) I really don’t understand why Giles is so upset about Buffy having Spike’s chip removed? Like, he worked alongside Angel when he had a soul and not once did he show concern about Angel attacking them or going on a killing spree. Moreover, the chip had proven to be useless if Spike was under the influence of The First, so whether he had it or not was kind of a moot point at the moment.
Oh. I think maybe Giles was upset that Buffy didn’t check with him first. Like, how dare she make such an important decision without asking for my opinion?
3) Chao-Ahn is hands down my favorite potential. There’s no contest, really.
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4) How convenient…
GILES I have to ask—why on Earth did you make that decision?
BUFFY Guess it was instinct, like you were talking about.
GILES I made that up!
5) It’s ironic that Giles accuses Buffy of letting her feelings cloud her judgment because I think that’s exactly what he was doing. Giles despised Spike, and I don’t blame him, he had reason to. But he was letting his hatred of Spike get in the way of seeing the bigger picture: if the First wanted Spike dead, then they should guard him at all costs because he might be a key player in defeating The First – as he rather obviously turned out to be…
GILES Buffy, I want more for you. Your feelings for him are coloring your judgment. I can hear it in your voice.
I’m not saying that Buffy’s feelings for Spike weren’t influencing her decision-making because they obviously were. But… Buffy’s emotions had always been her strength, her emotions are what drive her instinct, and the fact that she didn’t voice a logical reason to explain her choices doesn’t mean that they were wrong.
6) This is so me as a teacher...
PRINCIPAL WOOD Um, what're you doing tonight?
BUFFY Preparing for tomorrow's counseling sessions.
PRINCIPAL WOOD No, really.
BUFFY Watching a reality show about a millionaire.
7) Why would he keep his knife collection at the school, though? Doesn’t make any sense!
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8) ICONIC!!
BUFFY You know, it's not even that he's acting that suspicious. It's just—there he is. On the hell mouth. All day, every day. That's got to be like being showered with evil. Only from underneath.
WILLOW Not really a shower.
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9) That’s a clumsy way of admitting you once were…
WILLOW Right. Help you move on.
BUFFY Why does everybody in this house think I'm still in love with Spike?
10) I genuinely had to stop watching to laugh for a solid minute after this…
GILES Yes, and the language barrier is formidable. I was concerned that my Mandarin is a little thin, but as it turns out, she speaks Cantonese, which is thinner. But we muddled through, and, as I suspected, ice cream is a universal language.
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BUFFY What'd she say?
GILES She's grateful to be in the land of plenty. 
11) Oh, the double standards…
ANDREW  Um, I follow Buffy's orders now. I'm redeeming myself for... killing you... I mean, for... killing Jonathan.
JONATHAN/FIRST Really, why? So you can earn a spot on her little pep squad? You think she'll ever let you in? You're a murderer.
ANDREW Confidentially, a lot of her people are murderers. Anya and Willow and Spike.
JONATHAN/FIRST Interesting. And you're the only one she makes seek redemption. Does that seem fair to you?
You forgot Giles on that list, Andrew.
12) I love the little callback to Conversations with Dead People…
BUFFY Well, it is unclear. That's why I chose a top that says, you know, I'm comfortable in a stodgy office or a swinging casual setting—or killing you, you know, if you're a demon.
ANYA It also says I sometimes get blood on my shoulder. Or it might be pizza. I don't think I can fix it.
13) Such a great delivery on Emma’s part here…
ANYA And I wasn't talking about your date anyway. I was talking about this sham date of Xander's. I think it's part of a plan to make me jealous.
BUFFY Well, it's not working.
ANYA Are you nuts? Of course it's working. Observe my bitter ranting. Hear the shrill edge of hysteria in my voice!
14) Oh, but he does care…
SPIKE Heard you got a date.
BUFFY Well, it's unclear. I mean, I have this whole theory about a promotion. Or he's evil.
SPIKE Buffy, I'm all right.
BUFFY You don't have to—
SPIKE What? Be noble? I'm not. Really, I'm all right. Think I still dream of a crypt for two with a white picket fence? My eyes are clear.
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15) Oh, Xander, you’re still the same awkward dork you were seven seasons ago…
XANDER I'm just glad you're here. You're gonna love the coffee. Got myself a redeye—it's black coffee with a shot of espresso. It's kinda rough if you're not used to that sort of thing—
LISSA It's hot cocoa.
XANDER Well, sometimes I don't sleep too good.
16) ICONIC! So glad to see Giles’s gory doodles back, I fucking love them.
ANYA Giles made them for Chao-Ahn, and now she's locked herself in the bathroom. There’re other girls upstairs, and they're starting to complain.
GILES Those are flashcards. I made them to facilitate her training. Chao-Ahn never had a watcher. The language problem...
WILLOW You showed her these?
GILES I wanted her to understand the seriousness of her situation.
DAWN Holy crap!
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17) Well, excuse you, Giles, but if I knew the world was going to end, I’d like to get laid. And seeing your flashcards is all the more reason to.
GILES For God's sake! How can anyone think about their social life? We are about to fight the original primal evil. These girls are in mortal danger. Didn't you see the flashcards? This isn't right.
18) I wonder why Xander doesn’t quite disclose exactly what was that he did to Anya… could it be that he knows is way worse than “bad” and he doesn’t want to seem like a douche in front of the girl he’s flirting with? I’ve said it before, I don’t necessarily disagree with Xander’s decision not to get married – although he truly picked the second to worst possible moment to do it. That being said, if you did the deed, own up to it, call it for what it was – you left your girlfriend at the altar.
19) It’s nice to hear Robin’s “origin” story, so to speak, but I felt the scene was lacking emotion and gravity. This was kind of a big revelation as far as the Slayer lore goes, you know? But it’s a scene that just goes under the radar.
Anyway, I also feel it would be very unlikely for Robin not to know Spike was the vampire that killed his mother before coming to Sunnydale. He says he was raised by a watcher, and we know there were written records about the Fanged Four. Plus, we know how Spike loved to brag, so if he truly tried to track him down, he would’ve found him.
20)
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21) I still don’t see why they would take ANYTHING the First said at face value! Like, Giles hears this…
SPIKE Why did it appear to this one, then? I thought it was supposed to be pulling my strings.
ANDREW It said it wasn't time for you yet.
…and you can see that he’s thinking: “I’m right, he’s a danger to us all, we have to get rid of him immediately!”
But why would The First disclose its real intentions to any of them, especially the ones it’s trying to manipulate?
It’s just so dumb that they couldn’t read the First’s intentions properly, especially Giles of all people, it annoys me.
22) I find this moment really funny, but when exactly did Xander manage to send the bat signal? Or did he send the “I just got lucky” signal and thankfully they interpreted it wrong?
WILLOW No, it's a text message. Oh, it's from Xander. It's one of our signals.
AMANDA Signals?
WILLOW Yeah, the system we set up a while back. Like codes. Uh, this one's either "I just got lucky, don't call me for a while" or "my date's a demon who's trying to kill me."
KENNEDY You don't remember which?
WILLOW It was a long time ago.
DAWN Well, if we play the percentages...
GILES Something's eating Xander's head.
23) #awkward
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24) And how annoying is it that Robin keeps LOOKING at Spike in the rear-view mirror? You’re not supposed to see anything in the mirror because he’s a vampire, ya mook! And if you happen to look in the mirror and not see someone who should be there, don’t you think you’d go “ooh”?
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(btw, before anyone suggests this, he's not pretending he doesn’t know because later on when they’re fighting, Spike turns, and he goes: “you’re a vampire” all surprised!)
25) All you need to know about this scene, you’ll find it here.
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26) This scene is glorious!
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27) This is probably one of my favorite whole-gang dialogues in the show.
WILLOW What happened?
XANDER What do you think happened? Another demon woman was attracted to me. I'm going gay. I've decided I'm turning gay. Willow, gay me up. Come on, let's gay.
WILLOW What?
XANDER You heard me. Just tell me what to do. I'm mentally undressing Scott Bakula right now. That's a start, isn't it?
ANDREW Captain Archer...
XANDER Come on, let's get this gay show on the gay road. Help me out here.
BUFFY What if you just start attracting male demons?
DAWN Clem always liked you.
ANYA It would serve you right.
GILES Children, enough.
XANDER I'd need some stylish new clothes.
28) I think Giles’ speech would’ve resonated better if he hadn’t picked up the flashcards again, I mean, come on…
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But in all seriousness, I get that he wants them to focus and he might have a good point that they seem to be distracted with trifles. But… don’t you think they needed that? Don’t you think amidst all the death and danger and apocalypses they’d want to have at least some crumbs of normalcy? Don’t you think that’s what has kept them sane and helped them plow through it all?
But let’s keep this reaction in mind for future episodes, okay? Let’s try and remember how Giles’s speech might have affected Buffy and the way she handled herself as a leader moving forward, okay?
29) I’m just going to leave this here…
SPIKE It, uh, it talked to the little boy. Said it wasn't time for me yet. I should move out. Leave town before it is time for me.
BUFFY No, you have to stay.
SPIKE You've got another demon fighter now.
BUFFY That's not why I need you here.
SPIKE Is that right? Why's that then?
BUFFY 'Cause I'm not ready for you to not be here.
30) This woman is just… stunningly beautiful.
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31) Again, why would you believe whatever the ultimate evil has to tell you? I mean, this time, it was the truth, but Robin had no way of knowing that, and he immediately believes it? Everyone’s so dumb, it makes me angry.
32) I should probably re-read my recaps and figure out exactly when I started to get so pissed because I think I’m becoming angrier and angrier at the characters with each episode that I rewatch and I’m not even on Empty Places yet. I dread that moment.
33) If you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi. Thanks!
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tialovestelevision · 7 years
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The Yoko Factor
So you have someone you despise. This person has tried to destroy you, repeatedly. They admit, openly, that they are evil. They are a literal vampire, who survives off the life force of humanity. Let’s listen to relationship advice from Spike!
1. The containment areas at the Initiative are still overcrowded. The Colonel is talking to a bureaucrat. The bureaucrat wants Riley back, and that’s probably a bad thing. The Colonel says Buffy’s just a girl.
2. Spike called Adam “Mr. Bits.” That’s great. “Little Miss Tiny’s got a habit of bolloxing up the plans of every would-be unstoppable badass who sets foot in this town.” Adam is counting on Buffy being in the middle of his plans when his plans happen.
3. Spike has a lighter, and is talking with Adam about killing Slayers. Adam just gave a televangelist talk to Spike. Spike says that Buffy and her friends are crafty. Adam wants Spike to break up Buffy and her friends. Spike likes this plan, because it’ll work and it’ll make Buffy miserable. “What can you do to make sure they’re out of the picture?” “Not a blessed thing. They’re gonna do it for me.”
4. Buffy is in her dorm room. Willow’s not there. Xander’s visiting Riley at the destroyed school and delivering clothes. Riley insulted Xander’s clothes, and misses Buffy. Riley and Xander don’t like Buffy being in Los Angeles. Neither of them is a fan of Angel. Huh… Buffy didn’t tell Riley how the curse works. Xander is once again deliberately setting a violent, dangerous person on Angel. Riley is upset that Buffy slept with her ex when he was pre-ex. Men, people. Men.
5. Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing Free Bird! Giles is playing… and Spike’s there. He’s getting his blood from Giles’s fridge. Spike says there’s files in the Initiative that Buffy might want, including schematics for Adam. Spike is driving a hard bargain, and Giles wants to take it. Spike is attacking Giles’s faith that he has Buffy’s ear. “I’ve seen the way she treats you.” “Oh, yes? How’s that?” “Like a retired librarian.�� And now Giles is drinking.
6. Willow and Tara are playing with Miss Kitty Fantastico. She belongs to Willow and Tara. Miss Kitty Fantastico has a catnip problem. Willow isn’t sure she wants to room with Buffy next year.
7. Riley is at Buffy’s room now, He’s wearing Xander’s clothes now. Riley has patched into the Initiative’s frequency. Buffy is down after her thing in LA, and Riley is upset with her. He’s more upset that she didn’t want to talk about LA, but she’ll talk about it later. It’s the pants. Riley is still upset
8. Xander delivered fatigues to Spike. And a gun. Spike pointed the gun at Xander and his chip went off. The Initiative has terrible military procedures, but I do have to say that their engineering is top-flight. Quality Initiative craftsmanship. He can’t even point a fake gun. Spike was talking about boot camp, and Anya is upset. Anya stopped the nonsense, but Spike is saying that Buffy and Willow were making fun of Xander’s mundanity. He can point the gun at Xander now. Xander is now all irritated. Xander got fired from a phone sex line. Anya points out that while his friends look down on him, the don’t look down on her.
9. Buffy is patrolling. She has a blaster, and ran into Forrest. They decide to go separate ways, but they both have to go to a cave. And they just ran into Adam. Buffy’s fighting him and tried to get Forrest out of the cave. He blasted Adam, but Adam ate the lightning. He shot Buffy with Forrest’s blaster, and she got away, but then fell down a hill and is now knocked out.
10. Spike’s at Giles’s place in fatigues. He’s faking having been chased by the Initiative. He’s got a disk of info about the Initiative. Giles is drinking. Spike knows Tara and Willow are together. Now he’s talking down Willow’s computer skills and saying Buffy and Xander were saying bad things about her and Tara.
11. Now the Initiative is under attack in the field. Riley’s tapped into their comms, so he’s running out to meet them, and he sees Angel. Angel, your timing is amazingly bad. And Angel just introduced himself. He was beating up an Initiative squad. Now Angel and Riley are being men. Oh, god, men, TALK, instead of getting out your penises and waving them at each other. And now they’re fighting. Because they’re stupid. Because they’re men. Utterly pointless fighting. Initiative trucks approaching… Angel got away over the rooftop, and Riley into an alley.
12. Buffy’s in her room again. Must have recovered from getting knocked out. She has a bad cut on her head. Angel is there, and got permission to enter. Took two tries, though. He looked surprised when “I guess” didn’t work. Riley came in, and now Buffy’s angry with Angel. I hope with both of them, though the difference in power between them means she should probably be angrier with Angel. Oh god they’re doing it again. “I see one more display of testosterone poisoning and I will personally put you both in the hospital.” Thank you, Buffy. Buffy wants to talk to Angel, but Riley’s not leaving, so Buffy and Angel are going in the hallway. Angel apologized, and explained how he and Riley got in a fight. Angel is leaving, but his apology helped Buffy feel better. Angel doesn’t like Riley.
13. Adam is sitting around with a phone cable stuck in his phone jack again. This is not innuendo. 56k all up in his brain. Spike is sure he broke up Buffy’s friends. Spike is explaining Yoko Ono to Adam. Adam likes Helter Skelter. Adam is pleased with Spike. Spike wants his chip out, but Adam needs one more thing.
14. Buffy is talking to Riley. I think he thinks she’s going to break up with him. He wants to talk first. He thinks Buffy’s going to get back together with Angel. Buffy looks surprised and angry that he thinks that. Buffy: “Xander? Oh, he’s the deadest man in Deadonia.” Buffy is setting Riley straight about what’s going on. She told Riley that Forrest was killed by Adam. Adam has to go. He’s going to go do something stupid, isn’t he?
15. Now everyone’s at Giles’s place. Everyone is arguing about the things Spike told them. Giles is very, very drunk. Wow, very argument. Anya and Tara are in the bathroom. It’s a nice bathroom. Very argument. “Just because you’re better than us doesn’t mean you can be all superior.” Now Buffy has stormed out to go fight Adam. But Riley is at Adam’s place. TO BE CONTINUED!
Overall: That was painful. Not painful as in badly written - it did the job it was aiming for well - it just sucked to watch. Apart from a couple of Spike moments and Buffy and Angel laughing and Miss Kitty Fantastico, it was just… joyless.
I don’t want to think about it any longer. So I won’t. I’m going to post then then watch the next episode.
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