#tlwto rose alter

[wortsandall]

The Others- the lies we tell ourselves au

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very iffy on writing this one as I feel like no one cares because I'm basically inserting oc's into canon but that's what au's are for! and yall might not care but I care so I'm sharing it anyway!

under the cut is an introduction to leo's and rose's backstory and role in the moon knight system and how their existence affects the boys dynamic with each other and the system as a whole

tw for allusions to abuse, sa, and self-harm

starting with leo:

essentially he is a teen alter whose trauma stems from the time that marc was in and out of psych wards as a teenager. one aspect that he and marc share is not understanding or realizing that what happened during that was traumatic even if it's different ways. namely for marc, because of his amnesia surrounding it he genuinely doesn't know that anything unsavory had happened. on the other hand leo holds most of those memories (shared with jake) and due to being a teenager he doesn't understand the impact it has on him nor does he see anything wrong with conceptually.

in my head, marc most likely had a fragment around the time that his mother started her abuse whose sole purpose was to not piss her off. I feel like parts of this fragment would be incorporated into steven as time went on and the parts that steven didn't take would end up being leo when they are teens.

as a fragment-the goal was to do whatever they could do to please their mom and part of that came with the idea of longing for affection/love instead of the negative attention. so the fragment would also occasionally front while at school in order to get praise from teachers as a replacement for the lack of parental praise. which as steven continued to grow into his own person, the parts longing for that praise and attention started to exist solely for that.

enter the psych ward: and this fragment, now leo, starts to become more of a full fledged alter as the system needed someone to go to their therapy sessions as steven and jake were not suited for it. so it was leo and marc in most of the sessions (though marc only has vague memories) and jake hold memories of any fights due to being a gatekeeper knows what both marc and leo were doing. and the desperate attempts for attention and praise unfortunately made leo an easy target for those in the psych field who joined not to help people but to have easier access to vulnerable populations.

due to them being in the psych ward for long periods + the periods of time they were in regular therapy from like 13-18, leo is an age sliding alter. he will always be a teenager but his maturity ranges particularly because there's such a developmental difference between someone who is 13 versus 17/18. he also has two different abusers, one someone from the psych ward and another the therapist they were given once they left.

leo has a lot of anger because of his circumstances. specifically towards marc and jake for removing themselves from therapy. as it removed leo from a consistent form of praise and affection that he wasn't getting anywhere else. he ends up as a persecutor alter because of this. any attempt to remove or challenge his view of things leads to leo lashing out against marc and jake in ways that harm the system and body. the second part of my au/series goes deep into detail here on the dynamics between the system so I don't want to spoil it here. but steven and rose are the only alters that leo currently likes and gets along with.

I do think that over time leo will not be a persecutor anymore and come to understand that the choices that marc and jake were made for the betterment of everyone in the system and not to hurt leo. and that he's better off now because of those choices. in the end he helps out with various smaller roles in the system like helping to take care of rose as well as any task that any of the other alters aren't able to do.

overall I think that the moon knight system is terrible at recognizing triggers so leo helps with specific triggers that they never realized they had as well as helping the system become less touch starved overall. he'll also learn to move towards a middle ground rather than swing from one extreme to another.

now for rose:

unfortunately she has a smaller role but that's due to her age. I stumbled onto the knowledge of an alter in the moon knight comics referred to only as "Inner Child" and that's how I got my inspiration for rose. she is a little around the age of 7-9 years old.

in this au, rose is actually the first alter to form but one of the last that marc realizes exists. mostly because DID forms from severe repeated childhood trauma. getting blamed for your brothers death and then being abused for it certainly fits the criteria. and I understand that DID is caused by any severe childhood abuse, but one of the main traumas that people with DID share is sexual trauma/abuse. and I wanted to explore that specifically because it's less talked about with male victims. and I imagine someone like marc and jake would struggle with that knowledge and I again wanted to explore how that would affect existing dynamics and relationships.

on to rose specifically, in Marc's memory it seemed that his parents had a good relationship with each other and they seemed fairly happy. I think I mentioned this in another post, but I Imagine they used to go on dates and leave Marc and his brother with a babysitter and that was normal. writing this out, now I'm imagining they had a dedicated babysitter who moved or went off to college or something so they had a new one. and with the new one is where the trouble started.

I imagine this was maybe 1-3 years before Randall's death and stopped right around that time. as the parents struggled with grief that made their relationship falter and then the way Marc was treated by his mother, there just wasn't much need for one anymore.

rose's personality is world's different from the rest of the system. she's very shy and reserved. she's actually selectively mute and tends to prefer being on her own. she is a girl, but looks androgynous. when marc first meets her, he's unsettled by her presence and her general vibe. but she's very sweet when she's comfortable enough to talk to you. she mostly interacts with jake and leo due to not really fronting and staying in their inner space.

in the beginning rose fronted more often without marc realizing it due to their age. he has no memory of this but they actually went to speech therapy for a couple months (before randall's death) because rose would front and not speak which their father was concerned about. she only speaks when she feels safe, and due to not feeling safe due to her trauma when fronting, she really ends up speaking in the inner space. the first time she speaks when fronting is something very serious as it shows how comfortable and safe she feels. (it'll probably be around layla)

rose's trauma probaby won't ever be in extreme detail but jake does know and it might come up when it's his pov. leo knows the basics as well so if he ever gets a chapter, it might pop up.

rose turning up in the system is a sign of positive growth for them. her starting to front more and be allowed to act like a child will show their healing journey. as well as their ability to be a more cohesive system

jake treats her like a daughter and is very protective. a sentiment that leo shares, though it is an older brother kind of protectiveness. leo likes jake more than marc only because of his treatment of rose. rose and leo are kind of inseparable due to being in the inner space most of the time and only fronting on rare occasions. though rose rarely wants to or tries, while leo is constantly fighting jake for more time to front.

steven takes both to leo and rose very quickly. though he lacks experience with children and ends up more of an awkward uncle, but it's endearing to them. rose does not recognize steven as a threat in any capacity. but it did take her time to warm up to both marc and jake. she's more wary of marc than jake which marc is originally baffled by. he then chalks it up due to proximity basis which is true but not the whole truth. but marc's relationship with rose will be explored. for now-he has no idea what to think of her and tends to steer clear as her existence makes him uncomfortable which he feels guilty about.

#tlwto au #moon knight #moon knight system #marc spector #jake lockley #steven grant #tlwto rose alter #tlwto leo alter #my writing

[wortsandall]

the lies we tell ourselves (a moon knight au)

ive got moon knight brain rot so i actually have an almost outline for a two part moon knight series which is an exploration of the moon knight system dynamics and how that might change if they realize there's more than just the three of them with a tiny sprinkle of meet the avengers...(very small i want to focus on character and introspection and the avengers would be more of a vehicle for that)

basically i created two more alters, one based on an idea that briefly showed up in moon knight comics-a child alter-and a teen alter.

i wanted to explore dissociative identity disorder alter roles as well so in this, they fall into what I think would be fitting:

Marc Spector-host

Steven Grant- physical caretaker and emotional protector

Jake Lockley- gatekeeper and physical protector

Rose (child alter)- trauma holder

Leo (teen alter)-prosecutor -> caretaker arc

i've had this idea in my head for months but once I started reading the comics it started to solidify. i wanted to explore marc's idea that they are broken. that idea pops up over and over again in the comics. he's being told over and over that he is broken and there is nothing that could fix him. he keeps going back to this idea that if he can make himself "whole" it would somehow make him less broken before realizing that he needs to embrace steven and jake. and i love that.

but i wanted to show the struggle of having to embrace steven and jake as well as coming to terms that he isn't broken. instead of embracing the fact the he is, i think it'd be interesting to see him learn that he's faced a lot of trauma, sure, but he isn't broken. he works the way that he is. in fact he even thrives when he accepts that this is his reality. he may work differently than other people but thats okay.

add in his control issues and its clear how difficult of a conclusion that would be for him to make. so the first part of this "more than 3 alters au" would be about jake. i think jake would be something he'd have trouble accepting. he's still in that journey to realizing that he's not as broken as everyone keeps telling him, that there's nothing to fix. he's come to terms with steven, that's easy for him. he's always known steven. but jake? who in the show he's only seen in violent moments? someone unpredictable. i think that visible loss in the façade he's been trying to cultivate would be very hard.

and i love angst. so i cant help but think about that struggle that marc would already have with jake. only for that peace he'd brokered with jake to cause an avalanche of other things he didn't want to think about to fall on his head. that's what the second part of would about- this lie of control finally completely falling apart. the realization that there's more that you've been hiding about yourself. enter the other two alters and what they've experienced causing marcs view to crack even further. i want to challenge the idea that steven was the first alter. i want him to confront that what he did to steven, hiding things and creating false memories, could've been done to him too.

i don't believe that you can come to the conclusion that you aren't broken, that nothing needs fixing, if you don't first know/confront yourself and your truth. and i think marc needs to do that. and im going to make him. so the first part will be almost exclusively about marc, written in his pov. and the second part will switch pov between all of them but the main ones will be steven, marc, and jake.

*any other thoughts, brain rots and/or updates will be in my tlwto au tag*

#tlwto au #this was meant to be an introduction to an au #then i just started rambling about marc at the end #moon knight thoughts #moon knight #moon knight fanfic #marc spector #jake lockley #steven grant #my writing