#this is more than i usually pour into this blog but idk. ive always considered myself more of a writer than an artist

[omegalomania]

ive got a one free sincere poetical diatribe coupon that expires this week so im cashing it in on waxing lyrical about my favorite band for a minute cause im stupidly sleep deprived and its gonna be a long night so

the thing is this.

the thing is that maybe there isnt quite magic in this world but theres something to be said for the pure unfettered serendipity of a million little things conspiring to have certain peoples paths cross and the way this can change entire worlds. maybe i dont believe in magic but i believe in the unshakable fucking certainty that a 17 year old joe trohman had when he met a 17 year old patrick stump in a bookstore by sheer chance and listened to his demos and Knowing that he should sing despite patrick not being a singer and not particularly wanting to sing. i believe in the stone cold rock solid belief this kid had in this other kids voice to the point where he dragged his buddy over to his house to prove he had the pipes they needed. i believe in pete wentz hearing patrick stump sing in person for the first time and realizing wait, yeah, actually hes our golden fucking ticket. i believe in the last second just before patrick was about to get on the kit to record the drums for take this to your grave, andy hurley comes swinging in fresh from recording an ep with another band and knocking out every drum part damn near flawlessly. i believe in a band of scrappy dumb punk kids who grew up in the suburbs of the midwest and took over the world and didnt plan for any of it to get as big as it did. i believe in this weird fucking band with their weird fucking idiosyncrasies, this band of four guys who dont look like they should be friends let alone making music together: a heavily tattooed vegan straightedge beefcake drummer, the ambitious visionary bassist with the 50-megawatt grin, the tattoo-sleeved lanky guitarist with an inescapable rock 'n roll bent, the pixie-pale and painfully anxious frontman with the voice of a soul singer.

i believe theres a special kind of chemistry that only makes sense with the four of them, together. its the guy with the visuals and the words, this bassist who was supposed to be a lawyer or a star soccer player but instead crafts stories from the narratives he crafts in his head. its this guitarist with his love for the interleaving of sounds and ability to seamlessly jump from front-facing to incredibly restrained and his indelible blues-rock momentum. its this singer who never intended to sing but whose soaring, clear tenor is so utterly distinct that he quickly became one of the most iconic and versatile vocalists in the genre, if not in the world of music in general. its this hardcore drummer who pulls everything together and forms the throbbing heartbeat of the band, whose grit-edged metalcore backbone not even the poppiest of all pop choruses can truly file away.

i believe in this: andy hurley's unshakable faith that the band would reform during the hiatus, despite all evidence to the contrary. patrick stump writing the song that would become "miss missing you" for his solo record but then setting it aside because it didnt feel like it was for him, again, despite every indication that for all anyone knew, fall out boy was done for good. pete wentz, moved by a miserable blog post from his split-up bands singer, reaching out and sparking what was unheard of, especially for bands like them - a renaissance, a successful resurgence, and one of the best comebacks any musical act can say theyve had in decades. joe trohman picking up the phone and preparing to tell patrick stump that he wasn't ready to go back and do the band again if he wasn't going to be writing music, only for patrick to take the words out of his mouth and insist that he should be writing more and he was too talented a writer for them not to allow him space for that.

i believe in the little things. i believe in a band that was never expected to last a summer but has become an indelible part of music history, naysayers be damned. i believe in the unique chemistry of four guys who have no monetary or logistical reason to continue doing this thing aside from the fact that they love it so - they love the process of creating with one another, and they love the car crash hearts whose hearts beat in sync with theirs. i believe in joe listening to the first pass of "fake out" exactly once, picking up an acoustic guitar, and walking into record the instrumentation that ultimately pulled the entire song together in one take without thinking twice about it. i believe in andy simply knowing that "heaven, iowa" would make the final cut of the record despite patricks reticence and his not knowing how to make the song something he could say he was proud of. i believe in pete pouring some of his most vulnerable feelings into his, fearful of how well they will be accepted but making that leap nonetheless, only for the crowds to sing every single word back to him.

maybe theres no such thing as magic or fate and maybe theres no point. but i think of stardust. i think of four guys who poured so much love and time into this record and named it for stardust and i think of them as this: fistfuls of cosmic dust who all sprang from the same etiology. i think of them and its a romantic fucking notion but i allow myself this, i entertain the thought that when the cosmos formed and the detonation of planets and the dissolution of comets created that far-flung scatter of so much (for) stardust, that starry residue liberally dotting the broad span of the black, the four of them all came from the same origin point and like magnets ended up snapping together and thats the way theyve stayed. for years. for decades.

what i guess im trying to say is this: when the universe formed we all came from stardust and we will all return to stardust and i cant help but wonder if those four guys all came from the same stardust too.

like i said. its a romantic fucking notion. i believe in the little things though. and you know what they say about believers (never die).

#*making poasts #*mine #*writing #im running on no sleep here. its a long night for me #so im letting myself say some silly words #this is more than i usually pour into this blog but idk. ive always considered myself more of a writer than an artist #so i guess i should start embracing that here a little bit more #this is rebloggable or whatever i dont care. if it resonates thats great if not thats ok too

[yasugapped]

Tagged by @superjojolimon , considering how vague the “rules” are i have Rebelliously Interpreted the questions as changeable so i just like swerved whatever seemed 2 plain for my tastes. also a lot of these just seem repeated/too similar?

rules: answer 30 questions and tag 20 blogs you wanna get to know better

gender: female

star sign: sag rising, libra sun, taurus moon ;^)

height: 5′3″ but can and will kill you 

mood: a dimly lit image of a possum eating oreos. munchin crunchin havin a good night

favorite bands: death grips ..... i’d say more but i’ll let u all think on that one for awhile .... 

song stuck in my head: like. the ending credits to spongebob

favorite animal: trick question its All of Them.

last movie I watched: i watch NOTHING ......... i have. never watched shit or fuck in my entire life?? ?. .. i actually cant remember i Really dont watch movies, the only ones i really like are perks of being a wallflower, internal sunshine of the spotless mind, and donnie darko

last text u sent: ok i screenshot this picture of funny valentine and his stand like “couple goals” ... .. . .. .

when did I create my blog: i dont know or care but when i made it i hadnt even read part 8 ??? i literally was committing to yasugap before i even really knew what it was like ............ im such an authentic fan,.. also, the only other part i’ve read is 4, which i read solely because i saw a picture of josuke and loved him with my Life .. i literally only read it for josuke content and didnt care much (and still dont) for the real story of it. i enjoy part 8, story wise, way more but also i love josuke2.0 a lot and i just.. . love josuke And josuke bitch whathe thefculk1!!!

fear fear fear fear fear: i am extremely hesitant to invest in any potentially horrific or goretastic display because i have like. the worst paranoia. in january youtube kept playing when my sister and i fell asleep and when i woke up it was on a video of markiplier playing an scp game and it Shook me so much. i have literally never been the same. theres an scp thats just shadows on the wall and now i cant stop hyperfixating on the shadow on my bedroom door at night... it iis !! the worst!!!! bitch!!!! :^(

another strange fear is that, i sometimes get this extreme paranoia im not alone in the bathroom and i will typically pull back the shower curtain to make sure nothing’s hiding. i’ve also legitimately checked under my bed and in my closet, but the bathroom fear is a lot stronger than those for some reason.

last thing I googled: oh my god its “funny valentine” ... w-what a shock!! wh..o wouldve guessed. ... .. have i mentioned i havent read part 7,

sipp: i actually cannot live ... without coke ... uhm ..., i prefer coke entirely flat but also cold. i pour them out into a cup and set them in the fridge to fizz out. literally. also i cant stand ice in drinks. 

hmmm one of those uh GET THE BOOK NEAREST 2 U AND READ THE 69TH WORD OF THE 420TH PAGE: ok so this book is house of leaves. it is my favorite book and has been for a few years but i’ve never finished reading it ;^) 

i think the technical 69th word was ‘in,’ but here’s the whole lil paragraph there: “Near the centre, in crisp focus, squats Delial, bone dangling in her tawny almost inhuman fingers, her lips a crawl of insects, her eyes swollen with sand. Illness and hunger are on her but Death is still a few paces behind, perched on a rocky mound, talons fully extended, black eyes focused on Famine’s daughter.” this book has a writing style i extremely admire. it is filled with senseless, mindnumbing extents of detail and confusion, it feels almost like a modernized version of poe’s style???? also neat about this book is the looks - if you’re interested, try looking up just pages from house of leaves.

last thing u devoured viciously: we went 2 this mexican restaurant i’ve been to a bunch, i always get the same thing, but this time i got this taco salad. it was disappointing. like it literally wasnt good and i was upset, 

NAME???? i just realized this question isnt here like how are u going to get to know me without THIS ...: like,, i dabble a ton in original content & characters, and my ... sonas are always named maizzey starr, and “maizzey starr” is like my BRAND so i go by maizzey a lot but as far as my real literal name ITS KAMRYN !!!!!!! like im so unique and good ..... ... ... starts crying

password style: i have only had like four different passwords in my Life. this makes it supremely easy to figure one out on a really old account or website.... i dont understand people who ...... make up different passwords for everything,, i also never initially use capital letters unless prompted. i do use numbers in like one of them.

favorite colors: i usually like colder colors more than warm, but in general i prefer bright and colorful things. rainbow rainbow rainbow rainb

average sleeping hours: oh my god ........... this is wild. i don’t have any kind of sleeping schedule whatsoever. my schedule will do fucking FLIPS 3 times a week - i recently got melatonin gummies to try and get myself on a schedule but i legitimately think i have like a sleeping issue :^(

what am I wearing: d-dont ask questions u arent prepared 2 hear the answers to.............

dream u can remember: my last dream sequence went like this. i lurking forums for club penguin. people were discussing a penguin who was kin with napoleon. like kin as in the THIS IS ME not kin as in family. and other people - .. penguins....- were also starting to be napoleon kin and it was a trend and the original napoleon penguin was angry? this vision entirely dissolved and i was in my room at night, in my bed, and i looked over to my closet as an unknown, fleshy figure leaped for me. this is literally the most terrifying dream i’ve had in my entire life. oh my god

last meme u made: FUCK .... also this

how do u have pizza: I PREFER PEPPERONI ... im ok with plain cheese especially like when its cold??? i odnt like hot cheese pizza idk why ,, .. im not very adventurous with my pizza.... i really want a dessert pizza 

weirdest thing u’ve Actually put in ur mouth: nail polish...... i saw one of those my strange addiction episode with a girl who ate nail polish. i think i tried like three different colors - they burn slightly, the taste isn’t totally disgusting but its also not like.... appealing?? OMFEJFSDJJDGDHJFDJFDSGFD 

also one time i thought. we had a those huge bricks of baker’s chocolate BUT IT WAS WAX CUBES so ive tried cinnamon wax cubes too oops!!!!!!! i mean they tasted like cinnamon so..., .h-heh , , ,..kvkfkj

any pets: YES BITCH .  .,, . i have.. THREE (3) entire whole living dogs. and also ! three guinea pigs. i love dogs more than i love anything. .. ,, . .. . 

also im 2tired 2 tag so i mean u kno goodnight 

#drinks nail polish and eats wax cubes as a nice midday snac #how late is this?????????????????? #tagm #squeaks