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dreamerwriternstargazer · 3 years

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Everyone needs a distraction sometimes, so open the gates of soliloquy, step out, stare up at the starry skies and tell me: what does Doctor Who mean to you ?

I quite literally did stare up at the stars for a little bit today so I could answer this XD What does Doctor Who mean to me....the short answer, the best one, the most poetic one: the evergrowing expanse of fantasies, of kindness, and of love. Consider that to be the core idea, the thesis statement, to my soliloquy though, since you asked for one. When I was a little girl one of the first memories I have is of being in my grandparents house and seeing Rose and 10 on TV, I remember being a little obsessed with those two actually because of the adoring way he looked at her, and because of how powerful I thought Rose was. She’s far from my favourite companion now but her and 10 hold a special place in my heart as the first faces I remember watching on TV. When I got a bit older, maybe 7? I saw a bit of the Christmas Invasion, the whole time I was waiting for Rose to appear but then the Raknos spider lady scared me and I never finished it, I couldn’t sleep for weeks and my mum banned me from ever watching the show (I wasn’t really allowed to watch it in the first place). I was quite alright with that, but I eventually got round to watching the show again. This time, an episode from Martha’s era, New New York the rerun, and I loved it, saw The Eleventh Hour as well and I loved that, but I was still too frightened of any monsters there were so I avoided the show. It wasn’t until 2013, the anniversary episode, that I finally properly sat down and fell in love with the show. What made me fall in love with it, what did it mean to me? As I said, the fantasy, the kindness, and the love held in it. I think I fell in love with it way back when I first saw it, I just needed some time to grow into it. Whatever it was that interested me all those years ago, that dormant fascination I had, awoke the second I saw Clara and 11 onscreen and their unbeatable chemistry (or so I thought at the time). Not only the chemistry between them, the best friends, the Impossible Girl and the Impossible Doctor, but the sheer....ethereality and at times ridicule of the story, the perfect blend of emotional, and humorous. You’re giggling over 10 and 11 bantering and messing with War, then you’re depressed because “how many children were on Gallifrey that day?”. You’re impressed and empowered (I was at least) by Clara’s confidence, her courage even when in grave danger, her dry wit towards the boys as they “show off” and then deeply touched at those big brown eyes and the sorrowful compassion she holds in them, as she tells the Doctor, reminds him, of the standard he holds himself to. “You told me what your name meant once”. The moment I realised that the Doctor was a girl as well, and she was a Doctor that day, as she always has been. Everyone has one Doctor that is theirs and while I would definitely name 12 as my Doctor, I think Clara came first. She was the reason I kept watching after 11 became 12, because of course I was deeply saddened by that, but in time, came around again because of Clara, and stayed for...Whouffaldi. Whouffaldi does have the greatest claim on my love for Doctor Who because they, as a story, embody everything I love about the show. The extreme kindness that the Doctor is, and should be, the love that is held in every act he commits for the universe. There’s losses, of course, but there’s this unbound idealism to their time in the TARDIS together. “If you have 2 choices and you don’t like either of them, make a 3rd choice” - a concept I think that is held throughout the entirety of Clara’s run, the standard she holds him to, but it’s never shown quite as blatantly as the both of them standing at the end of the universe, and all she needs to do is clasp his hand in hers, and ask him to stop. The fantasy aspect is not only the various and illuminating worlds they travel to, the dangers they face and tackle (if it was, then well apparently London is a fantasy since one of my favourite 2 parters is the Zygon Invasion/Zygon Inversion, for the beautiful and heart wrenching analogy for war that plays like a faint symphony in the

background right until the climax where it rises to an unforgettable crescendo) but the way they tackle it, the hope at the heart of every adventure. Whouffaldi is a romantic fantasy, a completely equal and loving relationship, the woman uplifted as far as she is to growing into his true equal as no other has, and in some ways better because of the power of compassion she holds and holds him to, however the fantasy element of the show is just the sheer idea of....the everyday ordinary person getting to run off into space, and do the most daring things, finding the bravery in themselves that they never knew they had, and equally, finding the extreme capacity for human kindness that they hold in their hearts. There’s a great deal of difference between RTD and Moffat era companions, with the most distinct one being that Moffat companions more overtly teach the Doctor of their humanity and this is conveyed through Moffat’s brilliant framing of the everyday as the ethereal, but at its core it is always this mad and entrancing alien who is made his best by the humans he love, by his Companions. Companions, such an archaic term don’t you think, for a friend? The show could easily call them his friends, they are, but they choose to stick with Companion in canon as well as out of it. And one could argue it’s due to the legacy of the show, but I prefer to think of the implications narratively, it’s a romanticism, there’s a connotation of a deep bond to the title of Companion. They keep him company, they are his comfort, they ground him as nothing else does, these “mayflies living for a day”. Companion is the one word summary, the one word answer, to this question, because the strength and weight of the stories are given by the companion, because we see it all anew with every new soul who enters those big blue doors, we are risen to courage and kindness with each new character who rises under each adventure. Whether it’s the Girl In The Shop and the Last Of The Time Lords, the Girl Who Waited and her Raggedy Man, The Impossible Girl and her Daft Old Man, whether it’s only to cross paths for a day or to be bound together til the end of time (or as can be the case with this very topsy turvey show, both), whether platonic or romantic, as caretaker, imaginary friend, lover, husband or teacher, the unrelenting power and commonality to every adventure, every story, is the Companion, is us, living the fantasy of fantasies. The dream of the impossible, of being ordinary and daring to run through space and time being as brave and kind as possible, seeing all the wonders over and over again, never the same because nothing is ever the same, and doing the best they can to make some kind of difference in the universe, without even realising they’re doing it, finding that ordinary is a special sort of extraordinary. If the Doctor offers the whole universe, within those doors, the Companion offers their soul in the humanity they teach him, in the moment they love the Doctor and take his hand, and their face is “seared into [his] hearts”. The universe and the soul. The exact fantasy that a lonely little girl who was afraid of her own shadow needed. “Never be cruel, never be cowardly, and if you are, always make amends.”

#doctor who #whouffaldi #clara oswald #12th Doctor #11th doctor #rose tyler #asks answered #star speaks

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youremyonlyhope · 6 years

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Twice Upon a Time

For the first time in 5 years, I am watching the Christmas Special as it airs.

Ft. My dad. Who got sucked in by the opening scene of the Doctors meeting and decided to stay and watch the rest.

Ahhhhh 709 episodes ago! Amazing He did this before???? Oh Capaldi how I’ll miss you. Oh god if One doesn’t regenerate then... everything’s a paradox. Why is time frozen for him too? AND WHAT IS THAT GHOST THING? AND WHAT DO THEY MEAN BY TIME LINE ERROR. OH NO. “World War One? What do you mean, ‘one?’” God. That moment got me in the promo scenes and it’s still getting me. I have a weak point for WWI for some reason. “My nurse.” OH DOCTOR HOW I ALWAYS LOVE YOU. Ok but not the “It seems weird that he’s a man.” part. That’s a no.

My dad is watching with me. He’s enjoying the two Doctors interacting.

They’re being taken by a giant Sim’s diamond plumbob thing. Ok. Chamber of the dead? “The Doctor of war.” Oh god no. BILL! OK yeah but is it the real Bill? Sunglasses! I LOVE THE SONIC SUNGLASSES. Wait, they harvest from the dying? What? What do they harvest? And how does this fit into the Nethersphere and the Duroc death nothingness of Torchwood? The Whoniverse has introduced so many different forms and theories of the afterlife in the last 10 years. This one at least can fit in with the other two, just time pausing before their death to take memories, then they die and go to the Nethersphere/Torchwood nothingness. Why would the Doctor have to trade the Captain for BIll? BIll’s immortal last time I checked.

Just did a general background of season 10 and the puddles to my dad because he was like “Did she say she’s a puddle?” And I was like I’ll explain later.

Also my dad and I got into a huge argument about Doctor Who and theology and god and death and heaven and hell so I might have missed some stuff.

Is this when the Tardis starts constantly messing up and taking the Doctor where he needs to be not where he wants to be? Bill is not having this sexism. Thank god. FIRST DOCTOR OH MY GOD. SMACK BOTTOM WHAT?!?!?!?!?!! WAS THE FIRST DOCTOR REALLY THIS SEXIST ALL THE TIME? I’VE ONLY SEEN A FEW FIRST DOCTOR STORIES BUT HE WASN’T LIKE THIS! OR I DON’T REMEMBER. The Doctor has had some MAJOR character development over the last 50 (or 1500) years. OH how I am going to miss Bill and Twelve. My dad also really liked the scene and how they interacted. OH NO IT ISN’T BILL. Do they harvest their memories? Or maybe their souls? Something like that. Because it seems like Bill. Is it a Dalek shooting? IT IS A DALEK!! RUSTY!? I THINK I REMEMBER RUSTY! Oh if they mention “Good man” one more time I will either cry or I’ll scream because they still won’t acknowledge Frobisher. Ooooooh an older Doctor Who theme is playing. I KNEW IT WAS MEMORY. I CALLED IT. OK at least it’s Bill. Kind of. Basically Bill. HEY. THAT’S BETH FROM TORCHWOOD. SLEEPER. YES GIRL. “Well I don’t really know what to do if it isn’t a evil plan.” Amazing. Both me and my dad died of laughter.

“OH she’s even cuter off the show! You think they make her cute for the show, but just interviewing her she’s even cuter!” - My dad on Pearl Mackie during the little behind-the-scenes bit in the commercial break.

My dad’s been analyzing this episode theologically. He thinks this is some sort of Holy Trinity, the First Doctor, The Twelfth Doctor, and the Thirteenth Doctor (or maybe glass Bill is the Holy Ghost). And I googled “1 12 13″ and it gave me John 1:12-13 and I read it to him and he thinks it applies. I don’t. But whatever.

He’s gonna be related to someone. He’s gonna end up being related to someone we already know. OH MY GOD LETHBRIDGE STEWART!!!??!?!?!??? OH MY GOD. I SQUEALED. I HIT MY HEAD ON THE BACK OF MY COUCH BECAUSE I THREW MY HEAD BACK. I KNEW IT. OH MY GOD. THEY’RE SINGING SILENT NIGHT. I JUST HELD MY DAD’S HAND. THIS IS A TRUE STORY. HE’S TOLD ME THIS STORY MANY TIMES. I’m not crying you’re crying. Oh this is an older theme too playing why the First Doctor regenerates.

Oh, we could not have asked for a better send off for Capaldi. My dad just was like “Oh this must have been a great Christmas special for fans” after the old footage of his regeneration finished. And Capaldi’s loved Doctor Who since the beginning. So they really could not have had better end for him.

Oh, he’s gonna regenerate in the next 10 minutes. Noooo Capaldi stay a little longer. CLARA. Oh my god he forgot Clara AND HE REMEMBERS HER. I LITERALLY FORGOT UP UNTIL THIS MOMENT THAT THE DOCTOR FORGOT CLARA. I literally was like “...is it Clara? It’s Clara! Clara - b-but hE FORGOT CLARA.” out loud since I realized it mid-sentence and my dad was like “What?” BUT BILL GAVE BACK THE MEMORIES. OH ALL THE PAST DOCTOR REFERENCES. AND THERE SHE IS!!!!!! WHITTAKER! OH NO. HER FIRST ADVENTURE IS GONNA BE FINDING THE TARDIS. GREAT.

Ok. I swear. The first person that I see say something along the lines of “See, the Doctor can’t drive the TARDIS anymore since she’s a woman” I will personally murder them. PERSONALLY. Because I know someone out there will make that joke. And they will be found dead in the morning. And you will know who did it.

Oh I miss Capaldi already.

Watching the End of an Era look back at Capaldi’s run now.

OH. Oh how I love Capaldi. I’d forgotten about him telling Strax “Shush” immediately when he opened the TARDIS doors. Me and Dad laughed so hard just now. I love Capaldi. Capaldi is definitely nearly tied with Nine in my heart. Twelve is officially above Ten and Eleven. It’s official. Sorry Tennant and Smith, I love you, but I love Capaldi more than you two. Moffat has had a very important impact on Doctor Who, no matter what his devoted haters think. (Me, I have my issues with him, but I don’t hate him. I appreciate him for what he’s done.) My dad’s saying he loves Vincent and the Doctor the best out of the episodes shown from Moffat’s era. “We always hope we can make people cry on Christmas Day.” YEAH OK. THANKS. PROOF THAT DOCTOR WHO HAS NO CLUE WHAT CHRISTMAS IS ABOUT. Oh god I’m gonna miss Capaldi.

I loved this episode. And I loved David Bradley coming back to be the First Doctor. And I loved Capaldi’s everything.

I think the only thing I’m iffy about the episode was the remembering Clara part. I liked that the Doctor forgot her, even though I love Clara and it broke my heart. I don’t like that they reversed all that 2 years later. BUT THAT’S LITERALLY MY ONLY COMPLAINT. SO YAY.

#hope watches doctor who #doctor who #my family had christmas dinner early and i literally ran ahead of my family from the car when we got home #and got home at 8:55. just in time. unlike most years when i get home at 10 or later and have to watch the midnight reairing #also yes i'm posting this now at midnight. only because i've been distracted for the last hour #and then i had to read over it for typos (and knowing me i definitely missed at least one or two)

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