#sterge.rtf

[stergeon]

spending some more time chewing on the concept of byleth and edelgard constantly writing each other letters—both while one of them is off traveling and also when they're both at home and seeing each other every day. there's one on the emperor's desk in her study; one in byleth's storage locker in the barracks; one left on a pillow or slipped into a pocket or tucked into a book the other is reading.

the emperor is interrupted during a big meeting by a page delivering a "most crucial missive from the commander." she unseals it in front of everyone and it's a crude drawing of a smiley face that says "hello i love you"

edelgard would write these excessively verbose things, very heavy on the poetry and flowery language. there are a couple paragraphs of updates and then page after page after page of "i love you"s and "i miss you"s communicated in ten thousand different and increasingly grandiloquent ways. byleth has learned to bring a dictionary along on her trips so she can decode all the sesquipedalian nightmare terms edelgard uses to tell her she's pretty. most letters start and end with an implied threat that if anyone other than byleth reads it or finds out how soft the emperor is, there will be hell to pay, but it doesn't stop her from proceeding to go ham on the romantic sappiness.

meanwhile byleth's letters are. pretty straight and to the point. she's keeping her posted about the weather, about this dog that she met, about a cool tree she saw, and transcribing direct quotes and best wishes from their friends. but she also includes little mementos she picked up or shiny things she found (she's like a crow with pretty rocks, shells, and baubles), and presses flowers that she thinks edelgard will like, and attempts to sketch things she wishes edelgard got to see with her. it's painfully obvious that byleth will never have an artistic career, but edelgard adores every single drawing all the same.

(hubert made a suggestion to have the emperor and her adviser use different seals or envelopes for their personal and official correspondence. this was accepted as reasonable. several months later, edelgard found out he made the suggestion after the third instance in which he'd been doing his secretarial duties and responding to the emperor's mail, only to find the message from the emperor's adviser did not, in fact, contain the woman's latest report on the situation in fhirdiad or fodlan's locket, but a rather lurid list of her intentions for the emperor upon returning home to enbarr. one contained a diagram. hubert did not examine it.)

edelgard, who hoards every paper she's ever had reason to touch and who has a (frankly, pathological) filing system for everything in her life, has a special container for byleth's letters that is under lock and key. byleth, who lived out of a rucksack for most of her life and constantly had to consider carry weight when vetting her few belongings, doesn't really know how to... have... things. she struggled with toting around all this paper for a while, but couldn't bear to toss out even the simplest "meet me at 4pm for the council meeting" message. she had to make peace with the concept of using a drawer for something like long-term storage and frequently checks to make sure they're all still there.

both of them keep their favorite ones in the back of their respective journals and act like they're not so extremely, terminally soft on each other.

#sterge.rtf #edeleth #fe3h #fire emblem #fire emblem three houses #edelgard von hresvelg #byleth eisner #byleth x edelgard #them girls. y'know? #maybe i'll write something with this at some point. mostly i just think it's cute to shitpost about #i have them on the brain today #because i'm putting off solving a problem i ran into on a wip #and also putting off an annoying worldbuilding thing i have to sort out for a Different story i'm working on #so here you are. more fluffy nonsense about them girls.

[stergeon]

25 rejected edeleth fluff ideas

here are some edeleth stories i thought a lot about but did not write. if anybody wants to actually write one of these, be my guest (and also pleeeeease send me a link, i'm desperate for content about Them Girls™)

byleth takes edelgard on a fishing trip and she has an absolutely abysmal time

edelgard makes a valiant attempt to corral byleth's atrocious fashion sense ahead of a formal event

byleth teaches edelgard swear words

edelgard tries some of those weird herbs rhea used to give students to relax; byleth is more than happy to babysit

byleth does edelgard's taxes. she's wearing her goofy professor glasses. it does something weird for edelgard

edelgard takes byleth on a date to the opera and byleth cries the whole time

byleth reads a work of fiction for the first time ever. it's a horror story. she did not like it. edelgard reads her something nicer.

edelgard gets byleth to pose for a portrait and shows it to her

byleth has to give a speech at a big event and is a nervous wreck. edelgard has been waiting all her life for this coaching opportunity

edelgard tries to teach byleth how to draw (she is very bad at it)

byleth cannot for the life of her figure out which fork is used for what purpose at this fancy dinner. edelgard covers for her

edelgard goes all out to celebrate byleth's birthday on the day byleth thought was (read: randomly chose as) her birthday, not her actual birthday; byleth doesn't have the heart to tell her

byleth brings edelgard various souvenirs from her travels around the country. edelgard tries not to be so soft over it, even though they're… not all hits

edelgard attempts to make dinner and botches it beyond salvation. they get takeout.

byleth will not shut up about this cute house she saw when she was out on a mission and how nice it would be for them to "have something like it one day." edelgard arranges to buy the place

edelgard sees byleth in a dress uniform and cannot stop swooning

byleth is being relentlessly pursued by a suitor who won't take a hint and edelgard challenges the idiot to a duel

edelgard decides she will learn to swim. it goes poorly, to say the least, but she manages in the end. as it turns out, getting to see byleth in a swimsuit is a good motivator

byleth gets caught kissing edelgard by hubert. the resulting conversation is unpleasant for everyone. ferdinand, meanwhile, is overjoyed

edelgard is having a terrible, horrible, no-good very bad day. she chews byleth out over nothing and immediately feels awful about it. byleth forces her to take the rest of the day off to chill

byleth is going away for a month-long mission. both girls are inconsolable. they write each other letters literally every day.

edelgard really puts somebody on blast in a council meeting. byleth gets stars in her eyes

byleth concocts a very, very elaborate story about some kind of summit in faerghus; she and edelgard leave enbarr for two weeks to attend. surprise: there's no summit, it's a spa retreat

edelgard arranges a "normal date" where they go out in town in disguise and do very boring things like run errands, look at furniture, buy socks, etc.

doropetra-edeleth double date

#edeleth #edelgard von hresvelg #byleth eisner #byleth x edelgard #fire emblem #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #fe3h fanfic #sterge.rtf #i would Love if anyone would grab one of these and run with it #as much as i would like to write any or all of these i don't have the brain for it at the moment #i actually did write the swears one but it was too silly to post. i simply can't. #i'm considering doing a story where each chapter is a teeny-tiny one-shot along the lines of these prompts #but i have like. three or four wips right now and i Should Not make it five #c'est la piss. i love them girls #also um. it should go without saying but don't buy a house for your partner without having a conversation about it lol #this is fiction and our girl has money to toss around on stuff like that. the likes of we don't have the luxury #i probably Will write that double-date eventually tbh. i keep chewing on it and rotating it in my mind #thanks to arrow for making me so crazy about that one

[stergeon]

say it

Byleth makes Edelgard say swear words.

(~350 words; too stupid to post on ao3)

“‘Shit.’”

“Grotesque.”

“Give it a try.”

“… Shit.”

“Very good. ‘Ass.’”

“That one is easier. I’ve said it before.”

“Then why don’t you say it now?”

“I… er…”

“If it’s so easy, then do it.”

“… Ass.”

“Excellent.”

“Don’t mock me.”

“How about this one? ‘Cunt.’”

“Wh—I actually, um, don’t know what that means.”

“You don’t know ‘cunt’?”

“I don’t know what to tell you, Byleth, it’s simply not in my lexicon.”

“It means va—”

“All right, I understand. The gesture was absolutely unnecessary. I’m astounded at how many words there seem to be for the same thing.”

“If you think that’s bad, you won’t believe how many there are for pe—”

“Well, this has been a fun exercise and hopefully a source of great amusement to you, but I think I’m finished.”

“Wait, wait.”

“No.”

“One more, one more.”

“Mm, no. I don’t think so.”

“Please?”

“… You know it’s not fair of you to give me those eyes.”

“Is that a yes?”

“All right. All right. One more.”

“Yesssss. ‘Fuck.’”

“Byleth!”

“What?! You said one more, and that’s the one to say.”

“I’m—I am not—”

“Please?”

“You can’t pull the same maneuver twice in a minute and expect to succeed. That’s poor strategy.”

“Is it working?”

“… Regrettably, it is.”

“Then it seems like a good strategy to me. Just say it. ‘Fuck.’ It’s easy.”

“It most certainly is not!”

“Try it. Say ‘fuck.’”

“… Fuck.”

“Oh, that’s rich. That’s very good.”

“Are you quite satisfied?”

“Nearly. Now use it in a sentence.”

“Byleth.”

“I’ll give you one. It’ll be easy.”

“I did not—and do not—agree to this!”

“Just repeat after me.”

“No!”

“Say, ‘Byleth, I want you to fuck me.’”

“… Oh.”

“Go on, El. You can do it.”

“… Byleth, I…”

“Keep going.”

“Byleth, I-I want you to… f-fuck me.”

“Good girl. Wasn’t so hard, was it?”

“Less than I—ah—thought it would be.”

“Mm. Well, you’ve certainly earned a reward, haven’t you?”

“Yes, my teacher. Fuck…”

“Aren’t you a fast learner? I’m impressed.”

“If you don’t shut up and kiss me right now, I’m going to start swearing in earnest.”

“Don’t threaten me with a good time, Your Majesty.”

#fe3h #fire emblem #edeleth #edelgard von hresvelg #byleth eisner #ficlet #sterge.rtf #sick of having this knock around in my drafts so now it is loose in the wild #but it’s so dumb that i really don’t want to bother posting it on ao3 #if i got an email alert for this i’d be disappointed #besides i’m trying to pretend i’m hard at work on the vickyvesties right now #it’s not crack it’s just goofy #theoretically this takes place during the honeymoon phase of chapter 5 of shared space #since edelgard knows her swears by the time of muscle memory/shared space chapter 9 #edelgard’s combination teacher/praise thing is truly unfortunate but what can you do. sometimes a girl is a gotdam mess #it’s not weird unless you make it weird. but she makes it weird. #i think sometimes (like here) she drops a ‘my teacher’ accidentally and byleth politely pretends not to notice #because if she Did call attention to it edelgard would be mortified and that would be the end of whatever fun things they’re doing #frankly no one deserves to say fuck more than edelgard #but with that giant stick up her ass she’d have a hard time getting around to it without some goading #i also hc that dropping honorifics is generally a Huge Turnoff for edelgard due to power dynamic shenanigans #their relationship is Complicated Enough in canon before i fucked it up more in shared space lol #so byleth is really asking for trouble here #but i also reckon ‘my teacher’ is a vibekiller for byleth so if anything they’re just riling each other up now #godspeed girls. hope you shut up long enough to get some

[stergeon]

at some point i will figure out how to write the post-canon, post-empire edelgard autonomy fic of my dreams. it just feels like a very big task and maybe like with playing the dane, i’m simply not old and traumatized enough to manage it yet.

but my vision is thus: it’s set years (realistically, decades) after the end of crimson flower, when everything has gone as right as it can possibly go. fódlan is thriving. the social reforms have taken effect. the nobility system is nearly eliminated, if not entirely so, with titles made merely symbolic. social mobility, welfare, and prosperity are high. there’s an explosion in arts and culture and technology. brigid and duscur have gained independence; relations with sreng and almyra are much improved; heck, maybe they've even figured it out with dagda. in my most idealistic version, leicester and faerghus would eventually be ceded back to become autonomous regions, essentially disbanding the adrestian empire. rule is no longer hereditary, but merit-based. there's a roadmap for the future, and everything is on track—and more than that, people at all points on the power spectrum have already seen it bear fruit. with or without edelgard, it will be pursued. there's buy-in. they believe.

of course, it's not perfect—nothing can be—but edelgard's vision has been fulfilled. the people are empowered. humanity is free. fódlan has healed.

and somehow, she's had enough time to resolve her goals outside of politics, too. those who slither in the dark have been eradicated. edelgard and lysithea's second crests have been successfully removed, allowing them to live if not full lives, then substantially longer ones than they would have with their twin crests intact. who knows—maybe she finally gets around to having that wedding.

point for point, every item listed in edelgard's manifesto has been checked off. the ghosts of her past have been laid to rest. she can finally take off her crown. she can finally pursue the quiet, humble life she's wanted for so long. she can finally breathe.

... but can she?

edelgard is nothing if not driven. her intelligence, vision, and sheer willpower allowed her to plan and execute a revolution against two countries and the most powerful institution on the continent, all while she was still a teenager. as royalty, her life was never truly hers even before she became heir to the adrestian throne, with all the additional baggage of survivor's guilt and the desire for vengeance and her need to ensure nothing that happened to her can ever happen to anyone else, ever again.

so what happens when that drive has no outlet? what happens when someone who has been constantly in motion, constantly working and planning and preparing every spare second of every day since she was fourteen years old, suddenly has to stand still? what happens when someone whose hands have been bound for so long—first literally in the dungeons of enbarr, then by the weight and responsibilities of her crown—is set free?

being edelgard, she would step away from the throne, no matter how hard it was for her to give up control. she's always been focused on the endgame, and she knows that if she doesn't let go, she'll be setting the wrong tone for fódlan's future. she's too devoted to that endgame to cling to power much longer than she needs to, though i could see her making some excuses and trying to iron out just a few more things to buy herself some more time to mentally prepare before she's done for good.

but who would she be then? who is the woman without the crown? what becomes of a machine once it is no longer needed, when it has made itself obsolete? what about when that machine is a person with legs and arms and an innate unwillingness to gather dust on a shelf?

what happens when you get everything you want? what happens when all your wanting has been for others to thrive, and now you have to want only for yourself? how do you discover who you are when you've spent decades being everything for everyone else? how do you find meaning again? how do you find purpose?

after a lifetime of devotion and passion and movement, how do you learn to sit with yourself, and be quiet, and be still?

gosh, i would love to meet her. i would love to pick her brain. but boy, i do not envy the work that girl has to do.

#sterge.rtf #fire emblem #fe3h #edelgard von hresvelg #realistically edelgard is not getting all of this done in her lifetime. but that wouldn't keep her from stepping away anyway #'cause a funny thing happened to edelgard during the crimson flower route: she learned to have faith again. #so even if she couldn't check every box and fix every societal ill she'd still be able to pass the crown to the next ruler. #maybe not without fear. but with confidence. with optimism. with the belief that she's leaving the world better than she found it. #she'd have faith in her people. faith in the future. faith in the groundwork she's laid. faith in the systems she's put in place. #faith that her vision will be carried out with or without her. #and that faith would allow her to eventually let go. #i so love edelgard pulling a george washington and saying nah i'm good on power. peace #though unfortunately i could also see her pulling a teddy roosevelt #and saying nah i'm good on power. peace. wait what are you doing. you're ruining it. you're bungling everything. i can't believe this #and making several (failed and increasingly insane) attempts to get back into politics #who is the taft to edelgard's ted tho. i don't want to do ferdinand the disservice of saying it's him even though i think it's very funny. #it's literally the opposite of his character as taft notoriously sniffed roosevelt's farts for a long time #until he finally pulled his head out of the guy's ass and realized there are other smells. such as the sewer. and garbage. #smells which he pursued quite happily much to ol ted's chagrin #meanwhile ferdinand does not think anything of edelgard's ass except that his is definitely better-looking than hers #(he's wrong on so many levels but you try telling the guy that) #in fact ferdinand has always taken great joy in pointing out all the things that smell better than edelgard does #which gives him an instant up on mr Take-Advice-From-Theodore #all this to say i think ferdinand von aegir would have been a much better president than william howard taft. that's just my opinion. #i'm getting off the rails in these tags idk what's wrong with me #sorry for equating your blorbos to long-dead american politicians everyone. i know this is a cardinal sin #also please don't take this to mean i think positively of washington or roosevelt or taft or whatever. #i hate all dead old white guys who ever held a modicum of power #i just had a hyperfixation on american presidents when i was in grade school and unfortunately now my brain works like this

[stergeon]

HOW TO PLAY

What is this?

This is a collaborative story about Hubert von Vestra from Fire Emblem: Three Houses. The goal of the game is to help Hubert have a perfectly normal day without too much excitement or fanfare.

The story progresses based on the results of the poll at the end of each chapter. The gameplay is intended to emulate old text-based adventure games (and, yes, Homestuck).

Mostly, this is an excuse for me to draw stupid stuff.

---

What do I do?

Be Hubert.

Vote for the action you want Hubert to take.

????

Profit

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OK but seriously how do you play this?

I'll draw a panel and write a post. The end of the post will contain a poll or other question to decide where the story goes next.

You can help direct the story by:

Voting in the poll

Providing a custom response in the post tags or replies

Asking for clarification or details via ask or by replying to the post, ex. in the replies on this post

In each post, words that appear in BOLD CAPITAL LETTERS have definitions in Hubert's JOURNAL. The first time a defined word appears in a post, it will link to the part in the journal where the definition appears. Any subsequent time the word appears in the post, it will only be BOLDED AND CAPITALIZED.

The post may also contain links to minigames I've made (ex. the coffee game) or to other pages on my website that are related to the game (ex. Hubert's inventory, aka his pocket). I don't intend to link to any other websites, but if I do end up linking to another site in the post, I'll give a heads up.

Depending on the choices made in the story, Hubert's mental state may be affected. You will want to keep that in mind when voting. Remember: YOU are Hubert. And you want to have a perfectly normal day.

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How does voting work?

Options for Hubert to take will be listed in a poll at the end of each post. The poll duration will be one day. When the time has elapsed, Hubert will take the highest-voted action. I'll write/draw how it plays out, then post a new poll to choose the next action.

Polls will have a minimum of four options representing potential actions for Hubert to take. Three or more will be preset options, and the last will be an "Other/Write-In" option for a custom response.

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How does the Other/Write-In/Something Else option work?

If you vote for Other in the poll, please provide the action you want Hubert to take by leaving a reply on the post or in the tags.

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If the Other/Write-In/Something Else option wins, how will a response be selected?

I don't know yet! We'll find out together. Either I'll take the most common response, I'll pick one at random, or I'll just choose the one I think is funniest.

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How will the story play out?

I have an outline for the story. To the best of my ability, I'm going to try and keep it on track, but I'm leaving most of it to the winds of chance. If things start to really get off-track, I may eliminate the write-in option and just give three preset choices, but here's hoping it doesn't come to that.

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When does the game update?

The game will update after the current poll has expired and whenever I get around to drawing and writing the response. I'm making an attempt to turn things around in 24-48 hours after the poll ends, but who knows how long I'll keep that up.

Note that many of the pages for game mechanics, such as the JOURNAL and Mind Wasteland, are updated almost as often as new posts are made, depending on how the story plays out. You might want to keep an eye on those.

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Something is broken/not working on one of the webpages.

UH-OH! That's not good!

If you run into any problems with the site(s), please refresh the page and, if it's still not working, check back in 5-10 minutes. I'm coding this like a lazy person (read: rawdogging it without version control—yeehaw!) so it's entirely possible that if something is busted, it's because I'm actively tinkering with the site.

If it stays busted for more than 5-10 minutes, or if you run into responsiveness or accessibility issues, please shoot me a DM or an ask and I'll try to get it fixed shortly. Your help is appreciated!

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I have a question about the current poll options/a game mechanic.

Send me your question via a reply on the post or an ask and I'll get you an answer :0)

STORY DETAILS

What knowledge do I need going into this game?

The game is set just over two years after the end of Crimson Flower.

There may be references to events that have happened in my post-war fanfic series, In the Days After. However, you don't need to have read the series to know what's going on in the game. Hubert will also keep notes on anything that is relevant in his journal and you can reference the information there.

(FYI: the journal, minigames, and related tools are not hosted on tumblr and is instead on my own website for formatting/organization purposes. I'll give a heads up if linking to any pages not on this blog or my own website.)

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What ships appear in this game?

It's my story and I'm gonna make it gay. As of, uhhh, right now, these are the confirmed ships:

Hubert / Ferdinand

Edelgard / F!Byleth

Dorothea / Petra

RESOURCES

Links

Beginning of the story

All posts up to this point

Tools and mechanics

The tools listed below are updated almost every time a new post is made, depending on how the story progresses.

Hubert's Journal

To-Do List

Mind Wasteland

Pocket

Games

Games probably won't get updated again unless I get a sudden burst of inspiration or if there's a bug. If there's a bug, please let me know via ask or emailing me at [email protected].

Dress-up

Make a cup of coffee

#sterge.rtf #hpnd #don't reblog - reference

[stergeon]

who’s got something gay for me to draw. ​send me an idear and maybe i’ll convince my pen to make it so

#sterge.rtf #making zero progress on the vickyvesties today. i fear i shan’t be making my update schedule this week. #alas! nothin’ doin’ #i’m on an edeleth doodling kick though and that’s bringing me some joy #i’ve got them girls on the brain.

[stergeon]

december output: 7 fics

january output: 0 fics

february output: hopefully somewhere in the middle??

#investors hate me… my fanfic startup is bound for failure #sterge.rtf #eventually i will post something new to ao3 but i’m currently in WIP Hell and dying to death about it

[stergeon]

as soon as i finish this comic i’m never drawing edelgard in her stupid pointy crown again

#famous last words #sterge.rtf

[stergeon]

almsivi grant me the power to defeat covid and finish my nerevoryn fic

#i’m dying out here #i have so many ideas rip rarin to go #but the brain power of a particularly daft lizard #sterge.rtf

[stergeon]

stuff i’ve made and things i like!!

hi!! i'm rex, aka stergeon, but you can call me whatever you want. i'm a 29-year-old dyke who likes to write and draw sometimes. this is my side blog for those fun things :0) my main shitposting blog is @rumtumtuggerofficial and i like/follow from there.

📬 askbox: open!! send me stuff to draw or write (or just say hi that’s fine too)

📖 my fics on ao3: check ‘em out here!! comments & critique are always appreciated <3

current fixation:

fire emblem: three houses. at some point i will take a break from writing edeleth fanfiction and do literally anything else, but that day has yet to come.

what you’ll find here:

🛡️ fire emblem

🌋 morrowind / elder scrolls

⚔️ the locked tomb series

🧝 elfs / 🎲 dnd

👎 bad jokes

👯‍♀️ wlw

🐟 random things that strike my fancy

my tags, OCs, and other drabble under the cut

tags

pretty much everything posted here is my own work (everything else goes on my main blog). i don’t really post nsfw art, but i do write nsfw stuff. expect sword-related violence and occasional sapphic sex.

if there are any tags you’d like me to add to my posts, please let me know!

🗣️ asks

🎨 comics

👁️‍🗨️ musings/text posts

🐠 pictures of sturgeons

OCs

these are my dnd characters who i like very much and draw with some frequency :0)

ioril revendran

ioril is a Teen Drow™ from my Out of the Abyss campaign. he’s a wannabe wizard, a rude dweeb, and a political/religious extremist. he’s a busy boy!

he wrote a manifesto calling for change to drow culture and better treatment of men in their matriarchal society, as well as abolishing worship of the cruel goddess Lolth. this went over about as well as one might think and he was sentenced to death.

though he was ready to die “for the cause,” a group of surface-dwellers he shared a cell with convinced him he might be interested in seeing something called “the sun” and asked him to help them escape the underdark.

ioril is also an expy of my morrowind character and has a Dramatic Secret Backstory that’s basically the plot of the game, so wish him luck finding the volcano-dwelling godboyfriend of his dreams. unfortunately, that may be extra difficult to accomplish as he recently passed away in a tragic "blew himself up" accident, but here's hoping he can still pull it off!

rokas

rokas is a wood elf tempest cleric of Kord… or at least she was when she entered Barovia in my Curse of Strahd campaign. she was a brash and idealistic former soldier dedicated to helping as many people as she could in kord’s name, even if she wasn’t always that great at thinking her ideas through.

unfortunately the mists got to her and throughout her time there, she managed to become a werewolf, lose favor with her god and become a necromancy domain cleric, sprout skeletal wings, and became cursed to have to eat a pound of bones or fresh grave dirt every or she would die. though she had the opportunity to go home after slaying the vampire, she elected to stay in barovia instead. if only the dang vampire had stayed dead

#sterge.rtf #i have the interests of a young child (pirates / knights / cowboys/ trains / swords / high fantasy / pretty ladies) #but with the evolutionary advantage of being an adult lesbian #so i got that going for me