#starting January 2019 when it wasn’t too late

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

After death | Lost Gods

He looks at the skyline ahead of him, its famous shapes that tourists gape at like they’re observing a gorilla in an enclosure. It’s all grey to him, not just because of the looming storm but because the grids of buildings and lights have become boring in a way that seems fatal—this city is a dead thing on earth, he doesn’t care what anyone says. It’s all post-mortem—the blinking traffic lights, shafts of sunlight interrupted by high-rises, yellow taxis honking, honking, honking, like they’re shouting a prayer. He feels sort of like that too, caught in kitschy after death.

A little Harrison art <3 !! And an excerpt from the opening of Lost Gods!

4 years ago today I finished writing his very first solo novel, Moth Work, & I’m kind of in awe of how far we’ve come in that short time… 4 novels & 2 novellas narrated by this man who’s a little embarrassing and a whole lot profound (but you didn’t hear that from me!). A few more thoughts under the cut, but here’s a little note I made myself in 2020, the only note I’ve ever made after finishing a book (possibly because finishing this one changed my life a little).

TW for mentions of: mental illness, trauma in the mental health system, internalized homophobia

Technically I finished Moth Work at 2:34AM because I lived on the west coast at the time lol.

I don’t usually celebrate or remember the anniversaries of finishing books. But I wanted to celebrate this one because a) it’s Leap Day & I haven’t been able to commemorate what I was doing during the last one for 4 years, & b) because finishing MW was such a significant accomplishment!

I started MW in January of 2019 because I was struggling emotionally. At the time, I was racing to figure out “what was wrong with me” before flying across the country for uni in the summer (SPOILER I WAS JUST AUTISTIC LMAO), which led to a lot of stressful and traumatizing appointments with doctors. I desperately needed a book to cheer me up but a different one from my WIP at the time, especially because in 2018, I’d both discovered my voice and become really afraid of messing it up!

I also was taking a religion class at the time that was emotionally difficult for me because I felt reallyyyy alone and especially isolated in my queerness that I’d been hiding for a couple years at that point (& that I literally would not talk about at all, not even to people I trusted). When it became very clear I needed an outlet to explore my feelings (of being “unhelpable,” internalized homophobia, a general sense of aloneness/isolation) the decision of what I was going to write became pretty clear.

I’d written 3 stories in Harrison’s POV that predated MW starting in late 2018 (they were also my first explorations in third person present tense, which fun fact, I only tried in his POV because I’ve always written my notes ideas in that POV/tense combo, even when I only wrote first person!). I hadn’t written in a different POV character’s head beside’s Reeve’s since 2016, so it felt natural that the second character I felt closest to (Harrison!!!) could be a narrator. Funnily at this time Lonan was my favourite so I’m actually surprised I did not choose him but can we imagine how different things would be if I had???

I started Moth Work in my notes app (ICONIC) on January 16th 2019 at 11:37pm! The first chapter came pretty quickly, is actually quite non-linear for a bit, and was overall a lot of fun to write. I’d planned for the project to maybe be a short story or at the most a novella (does this sound familiar), nothing very long and definitely not a novel. I believe the goal word count was 5k which is so funny bc that’s exactly how Changing States & Lost Gods started!!!

And then the project stagnated, it wasn’t something I’d planned to write seriously, and I didn’t pick it back up until August of that year when my therapist at the time suggested I try to complete a “reach goal” as I was reaching Crisis and I guess I was so done with everything going on in my life that I was like okay fine!!!! I will write Moth Work as a novel!!!!

This book literally flew with me across the country… I wrote a lot of it late at night in my dorm with all the lights off after a long day on campus. I wrote a lot of it in my intro to sociology lecture LMAO. I wrote a lot of it on my phone. It was the first project (no literally) where I intentionally explored queerness, especially my own feelings as a (sort of?) catholic at the time. I explored atheism a lot! Something I needed to process my own feelings about faith & God. I explored what it’s like to be this completely unhelpable person because you’ve decided there’s no possible way to help yourself anymore (hiiii Lonan). I also explored (a bit like a premonition), what it’s like to care deeply for someone you can’t help (but that you very badly want to help).

And I almost didn’t finish the book! The imposter syndrome and insecurity went crazyyy when writing Moth Work. I didn’t feel like I was writing the First Person Retrospective Flowery Literary Fiction I’d deemed as the only possible “good writing.” (Still LOVE but I really was struggling seeing a very minor style shift, which is funnily much closer to my writing now than when I was writing the “best” way.) I deleted so much from this book. I couldn’t look at it. I was so embarrassed by it!! I made ultimatums with it!! I edited it so much but still couldn’t stand it! It was literally the safest space I had and I could barely be there a lot of the time!!!

SOOOO this is why I’m very proud of me for finishing it lol & while I would typically have celebrated the anniversary idk, in 2021, bc it didn’t exist until this year it felt apt to sit with those feelings now. I’m really proud of 17-year-old Rachel who was undiagnosed autistic & convinced I was a lost cause, who was sooo afraid of being queer I could only think of that through Lonan (& sometimes still do thx king 🫡) who literallyyyyy wrote a masterpiece in my collection that contains some of my best work (even if I only realized that 4 years later) & that’s been the start of EVERYTHING!

This is so much more than a book or an anniversary!! Somehow I made it through all the things I didn’t think were possible and now have written 2 books & 3 (writing the fourth) novellas allllll in this world. AND 2 additional novels in his POV!! Also thank you baby Rachel for Jeremiah. Like hello!!!! This is the only place I felt safe to be myself when I couldn’t be with anyone else! And there’s something priceless about that…

And it’s all bc of Harrison!!! Whoever I saw in that man in 2019… girl thank you!! Can’t explain what it’s like to grow with that character (who is sooo much more than that to me). Never would I have predicted where I am now. And IMO, that’s all thanks to him so ily fictional man in my head, this is soooo his day LOL.

& if you were here since the first MW update & made it this far… I MUST KNOW!!!!

#art #GETTING GUSHY UNDER THE CUT I COULDN’T HELP IT #tl;dr ily harrison #also everyone weigh in - what’s he listening to????? #IM THINKING OF READING SOME OF MW FROM THE PRINTED COPY #AT THE STREAM TOMORROW!!! SO COME!!!! #CELEBRATE THE DAY!!! YAYY!!!

[georgiapeach30513]

Hi Peach! Mrs. Pasta checking in <3

Oh silly silly Justin Timberlake. You know, I grew up with NSYNC and always for some reason did not like JT. All the girls in my grade were obsessed with him but I was actually team JC.

I don't care enough about the man to have any hate for him but I do think...his ego clearly cannot deal and it's finally catching up to him though it should have caught up back when he left Janet Jackson out to dry all those years ago. She was embarrassed and disgraced and he got to go on and be Mr. Sexyback. I'm glad BRITNEY of all people gets to serve him his humble pie. YAS Queen!

Sidenote: Jessica Biel Timberlake. I used to watch this woman in her prime during 7th Heaven and then her solo movie career days. Ironically I never knew she dated Ramen for that long but she was THEE It girl back then. Wow. And now....damn. She must really love this noodle haired nasal voiced man child that much to be still up his ass after all that's happened. Anyone remember the Alisha Wainwright drama? Ride or die I guess...SMH

Lastly, I'm actually really glad Ramen eventually got famous on his own and without the help from his much more famous gf at the time. GOOD for him! It took him quite some time because my first ideation of him was in 2004 in FF and then I forgot he existed until 2019. And then boom - he was suddenly everywhere. For someone who did not follow the MCU - he never really made it on my radar so even though I was always aware he played Cap I continuously forgot about him. Sorry Ramen! I was actually surprised he appeared to blow up after he stopped being Steve - for the general public. Between 2019-2022 it was something else. That and counting his own (at the time) extremely passionate fanbase, it really felt cool to see someone come up this far. A friend of mine actually mentioned last year "he got so much hotter now, way more than he used to be." I feel like he's a late bloomer in Hollywood terms. Contrary to some naysayers and "tarot readers" I don't think a resurgence is out of the question. And I DO hope he gets more work.

I wish him - and you and your followers - the best! Stay safe y'all!

Hey, Mrs. Pasta! Glad you ventured back here.

I gotta tell you, I’m tired of Mr. JT. I was a huge NSYNC fan and he was my top favorite. That shine faded quickly after his debut album, and with the second album he was still singing about what Britney did. That man has just always wanted attention and he didn’t mind which woman he stepped on as a rung on that ladder.

As far as top Ramen goes, we know he can act and act well and get praise outside of Marvel, Knives Out. But it’s a shame to see him deduced to a meathead action star and a husband that never smiles unless he’s alone. But I digress, that’s neither here nor there. It was refreshing to see him laugh, be goofy, and even walk with his head held high with politicians, even the President. Guess he wasn’t too afraid of meanies to meet with fans.

I’m very happy about Honey Don’t, and I’m excited to see what else is in store for him. I have a feeling he’s going to have a very busy year. And he started off January with a movie announcement and working back with ASP. It’s good to see him in his element and not to see him so stern or miserable.

#Mrs. Pasta

[mariacallous]

As a rule, political candidates are not reliable historians of the present. In 2012, while in Minnesota campaigning for reëlection, President Barack Obama recounted his “tussles” with obstructionist Republicans in Congress before indulging in a bit of wishful thinking. “I believe that if we’re successful in this election,” he said, “the fever may break, because there’s a tradition in the Republican Party of more common sense than that.” Not to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t been following along at home, but the fever did not break. Still, Joe Biden struck the same note in 2019, while campaigning in New Hampshire. “With Donald Trump out of the White House—not a joke—you will see an epiphany occur among many of my Republican friends,” he said. But, as President, Biden started to see the light—or the dying of it. In September, he gave a speech, in Philadelphia, asserting that “equality and democracy are under assault.” Last Wednesday, he spoke again, a few blocks from the Capitol. “As I stand here today, there are candidates running for every level of office in America—for governor, Congress, attorney general, secretary of state—who won’t commit, they will not commit, to accepting the results of elections that they are running in,” he said. “This is a path to chaos in America.”

The sitting President’s party has lost congressional seats in nearly every midterm election of the past century. When it first happened to Obama, in 2010, he referred to it as a “shellacking.” This shellacking season, the Republicans have no shortage of issues to run on (inflation, Biden’s abject approval ratings), and an expanding array of systemic advantages (the anti-democratic structure of the Senate, the widening asymmetry of gerrymandering, the suppressive spirit of several states’ post-2020 voting laws). But there’s at least a chance that, with enough Democratic turnout, all of this can be overcome. So some Trumpist Republicans have been flirting with another anti-democratic tactic: tacitly exploiting, or even encouraging, an atmosphere of political violence.

Trump, of course, has long revelled in threats of brute force, both veiled and explicit. After each new incitement, G.O.P. leaders have gone through the familiar cycle: consternation, equivocation, whataboutism, and, finally, full capitulation. The result has been a normalization of political violence: “January 6th was a normal tourist visit” is the new Lost Cause dogma, and Republicans who dissent are reëducated or excommunicated. It’s impossible to predict how all this will end, and it would be irresponsible to draw too direct a line between the rhetorical climate and any individual’s actions. But, obviously, none of it bodes well.

Late last month, in the middle of the night, a forty-two-year-old man entered the San Francisco home of Nancy Pelosi, the Speaker of the House, by shattering a glass door with a hammer. She wasn’t there, but her eighty-two-year-old husband was; in the moments before the intruder was arrested, he used the hammer to bash Paul Pelosi’s skull. The next day, Hillary Clinton tweeted a link to a Los Angeles Times article reporting that the assailant had spread “far-right, bigoted conspiracies.” Elon Musk—the new owner of Twitter, the world’s richest man, and, these days, a folk hero of the far right—replied to Clinton’s tweet, linking to a piece from the Santa Monica Observer, a gossip site filled with salacious clickbait, which speculated that the assault was not a political attack but a hookup gone wrong. The Observer later took down the story; Musk deleted his tweet, but he didn’t apologize or issue a correction. “Twitter obviously cannot become a free-for-all hellscape, where anything can be said with no consequences,” he had tweeted on the day he took over the company, shortly before amplifying defamatory misinformation with no consequences. Trump, days later, mused that “the glass, it seems, was broken from the inside to the out, so it wasn’t a break-in, it was a breakout.” According to the police, this is flatly false, but what difference does that make?

The right doesn’t have a monopoly on political violence, of course. Perhaps the most analogous incident in recent memory is the 2017 shooting, by a disturbed gunman who identified with the left, of the Republican congressman Steve Scalise and several others. After that attack, prominent Democrats expressed unqualified condemnation, and sympathy for the victims. After the attack on Paul Pelosi, some Republican officials issued thoughts and prayers; others, such as Ronna McDaniel, the chair of the Republican National Committee, found a way to blame both sides (“This is what Democrat policies are bringing, but of course we wish Paul Pelosi a recovery”). Still others (Senator Ted Cruz, of Texas; Representative Clay Higgins, of Louisiana) treated the incident as fodder for fatuous conspiracy theories, or as a gruesome punch line.

It’s a journalistic cliché, but a useful exercise: imagine that all this were happening in another country. A political leader, the object of years of menacing rhetoric, is targeted; the opposition party vacillates between downplaying the incident and playing it for cheap laughs. This is also a country with more guns than people, and more than ten mass shootings in an average week. And one where, year after year, voting gets harder, especially for poor people and racial minorities. How would you rate that country’s long-term democratic prospects?

Last week, Brazil held a runoff Presidential election between Jair Bolsonaro, the proto-authoritarian incumbent, and Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva, the leftist former President. Gun ownership had spiked under Bolsonaro, and the months leading up to the election were extraordinarily tense. The journalism nonprofit Agência Pública recorded more than three hundred incidents of election-related violence, including at least fifteen murders and twenty-three assassination attempts. Lula won, by less than two percentage points, and supporters of Bolsonaro, who has insisted for years that the voting system is rigged, took to the streets, demanding that the military overturn the result. Bolsonaro stayed silent for two days, and even then did not formally concede; he distanced himself from “the destruction of property” and other forms of protest, but did not tell his supporters to stand down. Once he is stripped of Presidential immunity, he could face charges of mishandling public funds and recklessly endangering his citizens during the pandemic, accusations he dismisses. But he may be calculating that he can benefit from mass unrest, and from the perception that there is no way to hold him accountable without tearing the country apart.

If this sounds like the kind of thing that can happen only in a relatively young democracy, consider that nearly every move Bolsonaro has made is one first used by Trump. “This is a path to chaos in America,” Biden said. “It’s unprecedented, it’s unlawful, and it’s un-American.” Chaos? Absolutely. Un-American? Maybe. ♦

[foxes-that-run]

I have so many theories that doesn't make sense and are just gut feelings. One them is about Down Bad. Remember when deuxmoi said Taylor was at Harry's show in London i think? It was mid june? So...

Fortnight shows that the guy saves her from the torture. Harry pulls her out of the matty situation after he leaves (i still believe the last time they saw eachother was before the 20th May show and they weren't seen together again which makes me think if harry had something to do with other than just being there for her after he used and left her)

Deuxmoi says there were Taylor sighting at Harry's show in London so they may have started talking late may. Maybe she contacted him again and this time he didn't push her away. So it'd make sense that she felt love bombed "rocked her world" as she says in the audio for Down Bad. But it only lasted for a fortnight. Because after she visited him and came back TR was spotted with Jeff according to the timeline. So she may have felt betrayed again that's why she's so angry.

Down Bad was recorded on 29 June.

Also she mentions is CSSM that he needed drug more than her which i think is referring to this time period more like the last few months and I saw a lot readers and blinds say that he was doing too much drugs. Or it could be a metaphor and bait and switch to make it look like it's about matty

Either Down Bad is about Harry or I'm reaching and it's about mh

Also we don't know when CSSM was written and it mentions him marrying someone from the internet (which may be a reference to TR or mh gf who is a internet persona i think idk) but it ties back to the 1 so it's obviously about Harry. Then again most of the songs seem like they're about more than one person so i don't really know. And the way maylors are trying to claim every song from the past as mh is so annoying and I live Taylor's business strategy but i sometimes hate how she lets people be so obviously to haylor and this fandom is also allergic to her writing about Harry. They don't believe she would be writing about him for all these years and i think that's one of the topic of BDILH

I suspect the Haylor fortnight is before MH and Joever went public, I think when Harry was in NY for the MSG residency and they both attended TIFF. Probably when Harry started wearing the Peace Ring again 7 September 2022 - 10 October 2022.

I suspect they got back together in May 2023, but it didn’t last. MH wasn’t seen with Taylor after

Maylor was last seen on 12 May 2023 the same day there were blinds he was talking badly about Taylor so I think it was over then. The 18 May sighting was without photos, never reported together again.

Then on the Haylor anniversary 20 May she said her life finally made sense and question brought happy memories before playing it.

[ledenews]

#belmontcounty #interstate70 #ohiocounty #UpperOhioValley #wheeling

[stawesume]

Life Update: New Reincarnation of the Goddess

Yes, that is an SMT reference.  Anyways, hiya, it’s been years since I last posted anything on here. January 2019, to be exact. I won’t really go over what happened in 2019 or 2020 in my life, but I will say that I have never been sadder than I was in 2019, and 2020 allowed me to actually be happy. 2021 was a turning point in my life, specifically thanks to the video game Monster Hunter Generations Ultimate. In December 2020 I got actually reliable internet, and so I bought a year of Nintendo Switch Online service with Christmas money (since I was still a slug back then). Since I have solo’d most Monster Hunter games, when I hopped online I was carrying people left and right. Helping people clear Elder Dragons, raising Newbies from HR1 to G Rank. All the people I helped, and all the friends I made in that game, gave me the courage to change my life. My home life at the time (and even currently) is one I’m trying to escape, but in May 2021 I was just so fucking sick of my life that I jumped headfirst into my own personal hell. Being afraid of people, I knew I needed a job that would force me to leave my comfort zone, so I applied for the graveyard shift at a local gas station. I went to my first ever interview, and got the job on the spot. I doubt it was from my resume, lmao. The most likely answer is that the employee crisis was just so bad that they needed any help they could get. I remember a question my boss asked me at that interview. “If you could describe yourself in one word, what would it be?” The past me would have used words like “garbage, trash, useless”, but in that moment I surpassed my old self by completely bullshitting. “Efficient” was the word I picked. I already knew from the previous work I used to do (intense manual labor) that I was a pretty good worker, so I guess it wasn’t exactly bullshitting, but I also wanted to become someone efficient.  I became too efficient, lol. When I started, everyone else started becoming lazy, that’s how hard working I am. I’ve been at this job for 1 year and almost 5 months, and it’s still like that. There are days when I deal with hundreds of people alone, and sometimes I’m still a little mindblown by that. Even 3 years ago I couldn’t communicate with hardly anyone, but now it’s like I’m back to normal. I guess I finally just grew up? Overcame my trauma? Or I hate my home life so much that it’s anger that fuels my hard work. Some days I want to quit, but the fact that strangers treat me better than my own family is what drives me to keep working. I need to get out of here, and I will someday, I hope. I get along with the majority of my coworkers, customers call me their favorite (which is fucking nuts, haha), customers try to poach me from my job, customers actually acknowledge how hard I work, unlike my bosses, and most importantly: The fear of people I had changed into an understanding. We’re all just tired, striving to live in an ever increasingly fucked up world. As for the me that used to watch anime and play video games all the time, he’s still here. I play more video games than ever before, because it’s basically all I buy aside from groceries, lmao. I’m watching 5 anime this season, and they’ve all been great weekly. I started buying more light novels, and the series I’ve been reading lately “The Angel Next Door Spoils Me Rotten” actually made me start cooking real meals for myself. Thanks weeby self, eat better. >:) That about does it for this EXTREMELY LONG life update. I’ll see you on the flipside, or possibly in 3 more years, wwwww. P.S. Still afraid of making phone calls even though I answer the phone at work all the time. There are still parts of myself I need to overcome, unfortunately. :(

#life #update #NO #LONGER #A #SHUT-IN #EDITION #YEET

[purpleyin]

Stranger Things 1-3 thoughts

This is one of those shows I've been into for some time but not quite gotten into fandom for until lately. Used to be I just binged a season by myself and then later on arranged a rewatch with friends. I recommended it to people but the most discussion I did was the IRL rewatching of it rarely. I had feels about Jopper since like the pilot ep and read/lurked those fics a few years ago but otherwise didn’t do much. I think I made precisely 1 ST moodboard in like 2019 for Joyce because I love her character and Winona plays her so well. It wasn’t until I ended up seeing Stoncy (Steve/Jonathan/Nancy) stuff regularly for polyamships that I started to think about that OT3 potential, reading some fic for them and then doing some art for the OT3. I’ve ended up getting more and more into that ship and majorly back into the show + joining the Stoncy server, which meant I had somewhere to go talk about S4, but there are no S4 spoilers in this post. I actually did a s1-2 rewatch back in January and s3 in March when I was doing a lot of Stoncy moodboards for Multiamory March, but I failed to do a post like I intended either time, so here’s some belated thoughts on the first three seasons.

Overall I think the thing that impresses me most about the show is how they pace it and how they always have at least 3 separate plots that converge for the finale. But also, so many good characters. Plus the family feels and the friendship feels - I can’t recall that many shows where I felt like they did friendships justice. S3 wasn’t quite so good on that - poor ignored Will who just wanted to play DnD and nobody wondering where Dustin was for most of it - but mostly it does. Shipping wise, my 1st OTP was Jopper, but I enjoyed Joyce/Bob in S2 too. I don’t often have NOTPs but Joyce/Lonnie would be one, as is Ted/Karen, I hope she divorces him by the end of the show. When I originally watched I wasn't entirely sold on Jancy or Stancy to be honest but as an OT3 I'm here for it.

S1 was very solid so I liked a lot and only really had 2 issues with that I recall. 1 was when Jonathan and Nancy cut their palms to use blood to attract the demogorgon. The theory is sound and it makes for cool scars to hark back to in s2, but you should not be cutting the palms of the hands you need to hold weapons in afterwards. Would’ve been way more sensible to cut forearms or somewhere, anywhere, else than palms. Anyhoo. The 2nd thing that bugged me a lot was Flo’s line to Nancy after Jonathan gets arrested following the alley fight with Steve, the whole ‘only love makes someone that damn crazy and that damn stupid’. Why does it bug me? Because it wasn’t really Nancy’s honour Jonathan is defending in the fight. He holds back until Steve starts on the taunts about Will and his family. Now, I know Flo wouldn’t know that, and she’d just be saying it based on past experience that people are usually being idiots for love (or money, perhaps), but it’s a writing choice. And as a writing choice it feels like it’s dismissing Jonathan being protective of his brother and redirecting it into having a big Romantic Moment meaning to fuel possible Nancy/Jonathan and it rubs me the wrong way since that wasn’t what spurred him to fight.

S2 I remember being so argh at Dustin lying about dart, keeping a secret from the party, because I thought he would know better but I guess he was blinded by excitement and a bit of ego about his discovery and then poor mews paid the price. Poor poor mews. Also the fact that the Nancy/Steve breakup wasn’t really explicit, though it certainly seemed likely after her drunken admission, and then she’s with Jonathan. That felt a bit weird, but then so did the whole Jonathan taking pics of Steve and Nancy in S1 and I think fandom seems to collectively overlook those things mostly so... Love Nancy’s determination to get justice for Barb and give her parents closure but Murray’s meddling with Jonathan/Nancy I just sigh at, least favourite scene of S3. Not exactly fond of the same style returning with Murray’s comments on Joyce/Hopper’s sniping in S3 either. I don’t mind Murray other than that, he’s a bit grating but I’d just like him not to be the writer’s version of a cynical cupid trying to push people together. It would be nice if people just organically realised things or the plot pushed them together instead another characters literal prodding the issue.

S3 plotwise was fun but oh boy the relationship stuff. The kids being bad at it makes sense - though less of the women are mystery creatures narrative would’ve been nice even if it is period appropriate - but Hopper I thought would do better and felt OTT in so many of his reactions. There’s some recent headcanons I’ve been thinking about that I think make more sense of how over the top he was, but it’s painful to watch some of his scenes and made me like Hop less during S3 half the time. Also, I think Karen deserves better than Ted Wheeler but no thank you to the creepy Karen/Billy flirting from S2 that came back with a vengeance S3 for an affair that was only just averted by plot reasons. He’s legally an adult (by S3 at least) sure, but not that much older than Nancy, and it feels like they were playing it off as ‘okay’ because he’s the seducer to play into Karen’s fantasy of being desired by someone again. They even went so far as to make the cover art for her romance novel she’s reading in the bath one episode of S2 to look rather like Billy. Other S3 stuff: Robin & Steve duo was great and I would’ve been onboard for their ship if it had happened but it being ‘straightbaited’ was something of a nice change and yay for an unexpected pleasant surprise to have canonically gay character. Scoops Troop together was fun but Erica really wasn’t wrong about the child endangerment. Felt so much for Will this season since no one seems to be thinking about him and he just gets more and more, rightly, angry at being dismissed. I love that we got a Karen and Nancy bonding moment. Joyce and Hop investigating duo was heart eyes until Hop gets majorly whumped, but lol and wow at Joyce having to drag him out of there after. Joyce figuring out the magnets and going to Scott Clarke also pretty fun too. I keep wanting Joyce to get a new job, because she clearly has skills that are not being used at Melvalds. In general, seeing Steve out of his high school setting was a nice change to see he’s not always on top of things. Alexei was fun too and still sad at him dying. The horror of it, how massively affected the town was by s3, that really stuck out because before then it’d only seemed to affect a handful.

I think the other thing that stood out in S3 was the Jonathan/Nancy argument - that hurt to watch too. But I like it because they are both right, just arguing at cross purposes. Nancy is totally right that the newspaper guys don’t respect her and nothing she does is gonna change it, the game is rigged against her, which Jonathan can’t apparently see. And she’s oblivious to his concerns, because he needs the job, unlike her, because she’s been so privileged to grow up not wanting for anything, not having to a be an adult before her time like he has, working to help his family. Anyhow, I will do some s4 ep thoughts sometime soon, though probably going 1 ep per post because I had so many thoughts on watching those for the first time.

#stranger things #stranger things season 1 #stranger things season 2 #stranger things season 3 #hans watches stuff

[tonyrobbinstrivechallenge98]

Rock The Boat; Possess Your Future

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She started IT Cosmetics which was the very first firm to make high-end cosmetics for females in their 30's who don't like hefty makeup each day. Also a world-renowned inspirational speaker with more than thirty years as a wellness expert. Tony Robbins Complimentary Digital Event After that there are good vital note speakers to load time i hunch, yet they were not anticipated and not adding content worth. They include incredible motivational value though you could read their books as well as obtain more. Additionally, I also bought 1-1 training and spend over $5000 on that particular. It is fairly costly (somewhere around $300/30 minutes session), yet if it assists me to reach my goals it possibly worth it. Sadly, it wasn't and contract with the trainer was returned to the Tony Robbins organization. I was never contacted to get a new instructor as well as when reach out to them and also clarified the scenario I was guaranteed a different train. He utilized to sleep just 4 hours an evening, but now aims for 6. On-demand accessibility to the tested methods that have made Tony Robbins one of the most successful life & business trainer on the planet. A rich brand-new electronic experience that provides Tony's fans a brand-new way to access his training competence as well as library of web content. A number of people have taken to social media to share they have joined Tony's challenge. The motivational titan discussed that the objective of this program is to help people return on course with their objectives and also strategies which they could have postponed as a result of the pandemic. And also while Tony can not participate in those seminars due to the pandemic scenario, he has actually constantly made use of social media to develop something meaningful and also valuable for his fans. Both of us single parents as well as handicapped too but had conserved hard to get the tickets. We could not go to the new date & needed the money anyway. We called Success Resources over and over and also they refused to refund. So we lost our cash which we really required. We look for companies with a goal that straightens with ours to equip individuals and also organizations to make a considerable difference in the quality of life of individuals commonly forgotten. I discuss methods to transform followers into customers and also clients into followers. I likewise share means to use real-time strategies to spread out ideas, influence minds, as well as construct business. If you don't currently have the life of your dreams with total control over your happiness, purpose as well as funds ... it's due to the fact that something is getting in your way. So you'll gain from Dean Graziosi, Tony Robbins and the first-rate visitor speakers exactly how to silence outer critics as well as your own inner villain to finally make the actions required to get the life you genuinely want. Do not be concerned if you're a novice. This occasion is entirely complimentary, and also all you need to participate is an open mind and also a need to make a distinction. You'll be learning from several of one of the most authentic and also take on underdogs of our generation. Essentially, the 10-Day Difficulty is just a difficulty to obey the wellness concepts that Tony educates for 10 days. Nuclear Fusion Is One Step Closer With Brand-new Ai Innovation Various other organizations may also put out cost-free data from time to time with the goal of advancing a cause, or catching people's attention. The surge in brand names taking their marketing research and data analysis in-house has actually coincided with the surge of modern technology streamlining the process. These devices pull with large quantities of data as well as lay out considerable information that will aid you make the most vital decisions. Take item advancement as an example-- even if a feature was a hit in your last item, exactly how can you make certain it will be in the following one? I have actually read numerous books and done something about it, since I am 100% in on boosting myself. I have actually likewise openly documented my self-improvement journey for the last 15 YEARS. If that's not "doing the homework," I do not know what is. Sponsor will certainly not be responsible for failed efforts to notify any type of prospective winner. Marketing research is the activity or task of collecting info about market needs and choices. This impacts every element of business-- consisting of brand name, product, client service, advertising and sales. By recognizing exactly how your target market really feels and also behaves, you can then take actions to meet those requirements and also alleviate the danger of an experience gap-- which is what your target market expects you deliver versus what you really deliver. He's additionally a two-time NCAA All-American and the No. 1 seed in this year's qualifier. Amos, on the various other hand, had a solid true fresher season at Wisconsin and also will certainly get in the Tests seeded second, one weight class over Schultz. https://www.facebook.com/deangraziosipage/ of 97kg at the Tests will have a best-of-three match collection versus Olympian Hancock, as well as Amos will be looking for that chance with the hopes of a rematch against the athlete that beat him out for the Olympic spot last year. Along with Jason Nolf as the No. 1 seed in the men's 74kg brace though, the Nittany Lions likewise have a No. 1 seed in the ladies's 62kg weight class with Jennifer Rogers leading a seven-person seeded brace. These sentiments can be increased when affected employees are not associated with the technology advancement process. Proof of entry or sending the submission is not proof of invoice by Enroller. Insufficient, late or any type of entries that do not totally comply with the directions as attended to each of the Early Competitors Prizes and also Daily Prizes throughout the Competitors will not be eligible to win any of the Very Early Competitors Prizes, Daily Prizes or the Grand Reward.

#deangraziosi

[traveltrainsandcoffee]

THE 2021/22 FFL END OF SEASON REVIEW

The summer of 2021 and the season was about to start. After two seasons of Covid horrors would this season be different.  What would the 30th season of FFL bring? A few weeks earlier and England came so close to winning the Euro's. Steve Tatham had won the  Euro FFL to add to his 2020 FFL title.  After a 2nd in the Euro's plus the 2021 FFL title The Hawk was pre-season favourite. Stally had won the champions league last time and maybe the good times were about to return. After 2019, the treble and world record score Kieron Mullin's trophy winning had seemed to dry up. Could Kieron get back to winning ways? New managers like Christian Bucknell and Ursula Turner joined the league. Then there was Colin Fenwick. New to the main FFL after entering Euros and World Cup FFL. Colin was from Northern Italy. Very northern Italy, well Grimsby. His impact on FFL would be spectacular.

As the season started all the talk was about Kane, would he be going to Man City or not? It look almost certain he would, but in the end he stayed at spurs. Amazingly Benitez was the new Everton manager. All the Agent Rafa stuff from Reds would make this season a very long one. The early season pace setter was Michael Dymond. Kane wasn’t moving, but Ronaldo was. Yes the mighty CR7 was returning to England. Too late for FFL, but he was back and it looked like he was going to City, resulting in some UTD fans burning their shirts. This was something they would regret when he signed back at Old Trafford, was he the final piece needed for a league challenge? The first full table of the season saw Duncan Mackenzie top, Colin Fenwick 2nd and Stally 3rd. All the talk was about CR7, apart from our Forest supporting managers were moaning about their poor start and sacked manager.

Late September and Lee Ritchie fell asleep on his phone and sent us all some strange messages. Senol Durmush was now top with Colin 2nd and Stally 3rd. The Bennetts Shield saw Danny Lawson beat the Hawk on a tie break six. This was already looking like a disappointing season for the hawk.  Covid-19 was causing some problems, after an international break players from Brazil were forced to go for a period of isolation resulting in pen points for some managers. The start of the champions league added to the Hawks problems, he was getting hammered and having a nightmare. Former champion Paul Taylor was also having a mare 9 points adrift at the bottom.

End of October and its very tight at the top, Colin, Michael Dymond and Senol are the top 3. These along with Kieron Mullin, Mark Kiszka and Lee Ritchie would become the main challengers.  The Hawk was out of the champion’s league, Stally, Duncan, Senol and Tappy all through. The Hawk started to reflect on a terrible season so far, but warned everyone he will be back. By the 5th anniversary of looking bored at the darts Senol was 8 points clear at the top.

Late November and Senol was still top, bad weather cancelled the Burnley spurs game and the first game of our champions league second group stage. Covid-19 infections were starting to surge again resulting in some matches being cancelled. Second group stage champion’s league had to stop until full fixture programmes returned. A new variant called Omicron was sweeping the country. Would we return to empty stadiums or even lockdowns?  Our Grimsby Roma now hit the front and would be the Christmas number one, with Mark Kiszka, Michael Dymond and Senol. Over the next few weeks Colin would open up a 15 point lead while the chasing pack lost ground. So many players missing and games called off due to Covid, plus AFCON coming soon meant there was little risk of Kieron’s Mullins 417 world record being challenge this season. The champion’s league still hadn’t returned.

Late January and the champions league returned, Colin was past 200 points and 16 points clear. Everton sacked Rafa and replaced him with Lampard. By mid Feb Colin had hit the turbo boost button, 27 point lead. At the bottom Paul Taylor started to show improvement and now new boy Christian Bucknell was bottom. First round FA cup wins for Senol, Mark Kiszka, The Hawk and Stally. Matt Wheeler beat Tracey Grant after a replay. As the weeks passed Colin kept a 25 point+ gap at the top. Late February and Russia had invaded Ukraine. As sanctions were put on billionaire London Russians Chelsea were thrown into chaos. The horrors in Ukraine dominated the news and Russia were kicked out of all major sports including the football.

March and the lead was still 26 points and Colin was closing in on 300 points, but with all those cancelled games there was probably more games left than normal for the time of year. While crazies were cabling themselves to the Everton goal Colin passed 300, but was held to a draw in the 2nd round of the FA cup by Michael Dymond. Senol beat Matt Wheeler, Mark Kiska beat Stally while Kieron drew with The Hawk. The final champion’s league games were played meaning the semis would be Stally v Mark Kiszka while Jamie Burnett would play Duncan Mackenzie.

Italy were out of the world cup, after winning Euro 2020, they failed to reach the world cup. Early April and Colin hit the turbo button again, blowing Michael away in the replay by 23 points, his lead at the top now 47 points. Was the double and the world record score in his sights? Kieron beat the Hawk in a replay. Kieron would Play Mark Kiszka, while Colin would play Senol in the semi-finals. Mark was still on for two cups as he made the champions league final against Jamie Burnett.  A good weekend saw Senol close the gap to 36 points, a week later and they would meet in the cup. The week passed and Colin hammered Senol by 17 points. Kieron won the other semi meaning he was the only thing standing between Colin and the double, in his first season. He was starting to close in on the world record.

May. Mark had a 2 point lead over Jamie after the first leg of the champion’s league final. Colin was 52 points clear and closing in on 400 points. Liverpool were on for the quadruple, Mrs Rooney and Mrs Vardy were battling in court over the so called Wagatha Christie case and my beloved Everton were facing the drop. Forest had turned their season around and in the play offs. A brilliant FA cup final saw Colin and Kieron battle out a draw. Kieron won on a tie break six, his first trophy since 2019 and a record 12th trophy. The double was gone, but Colin was now only 10 points off the world record. Amazing scenes at Goodison as Everton had pulled off a great escape.

The final weekend of the season, Everton were safe. Man city were battling with Liverpool for the title. In FFL Colin needed 6 points to break the world record. The race for the champion’s league spots was on. However most important of all the second leg of the champions league final. Mark was 2 points ahead of Jamie after the first leg, Liverpool went behind early, but were level, Villa were beating City by 2. All these goals and lack of cleans sheets were bad for Colin’s world record bid, but lots of goals also coming his way. City raced back to lead. Liverpool scored and went ahead. In the end City won the league and Colin Fenwick won FFL, by a record margin, in a world record score of 425 points. Lots of missing players and penalty points meant Jamie Burnett fell apart in the second leg of the final. Mark Kiszka finally won his first FFL trophy winning the Champions league. Jamie did just hung on to the last champions league spot.

 So in the 30th season of FFL, Colin Fenwick became the 18th manager to win the league, amazingly in his first season.  Kieron won the FA Cup, a record 12th FFL trophy. Mark Kiszka won the champions league and Christian Bucknell followed in his father’s footsteps and won the wooden spoon. Oliver Taylor-Yassin won the Taylor family title. Next season Colin, Kieron, Mark and Michael Dymond will be the champion’s league seeds. They will be joined by Senol, Matt Rushton, Matt Wheeler, Lee Ritchie, Tracey Grant, Jon Thomson, The Hawk and just Jamie Burnett.

Thank you for a really amazing season, trophies to come in the next few weeks,

2 Final thoughts

1st Will Colin Fenwick be able to perform like that again next season?

2nd Hopefully no disruptions or gaps in the seasons next time, apart from a Christmas World cup.

MT

[islandpcosjourney]

Day 5 – May ’22 challenge

13th May 2022

Bundles of energy today but oh my goodness it is cold! When I’m cold, I really start to resent cold juices! When I’m juicing-only, I definitely feel the cold easier but coupled with the atrocious weather we’re having just now on the island, it’s making me veer towards having hot soup this weekend. The intense wind and rain I experienced today while just simply trying to load my groceries into the car, penetrated right through to my bones.

During my first juicy week in July 2020, I used blended vegetable soups as my evening meals so that I didn’t feel so bad watching my mum and brother eating while I drank. I still lost 8lbs that week so I know that the right sort of soup won’t affect me. Problem is, I don’t think I have anything like that in at the moment – only Cullen skink, chunky leek & potato, chunky broth, or creamed leek & potato, all of which will be carb-heavy and would undoubtedly bloat me up. I was so careful what I ate but still enjoyed every mouthful. I definitely need to get back to that mindset again. A friend asked me the other day, what do I eat in-between juicing and the honest answer lately, has been rubbish. I’ve become complacent and getting a bit arrogant again about what I can potentially eat without it affecting me. Truth of the matter is, I’ve lost my colour in my “food” versus my juices. In my juices, you can usually find the most colourful produce being used but in my food, I certainly can’t say that.

On Facebook today I noticed an ad for some app or diet plan or other because the photo they used really caught my eye. It was exactly the type of food I would’ve prepared and wanted to eat almost 2 years ago – halloumi, quinoa, tender stem broccoli & pomegranate seeds among many other tasty superfoods. You see that type of food doesn’t come naturally to me, although I take one look at it and would eat it all up straight away. I need to find my healthy food cravings again after this challenge. Make the effort to choose meals again rather than planning to juice, failing to and then resorting to eating whatever Kevin has to offer, usually from his BBQ. He’s trying to be healthier too, but I definitely don’t need to be eating meat every day. The food I generally float towards tends to be related to my life 15+ years ago rather than what I’d “like” to eat now. I’m gathering that old habits always rear their ugly heads when focus is lost.

I found myself tearing up on the drive home tonight. I have just felt a little lost on my journey lately and I found myself praying, giving thanks to God for how far he’s brought me already. I am in no way the model Christian, but I still feel very grateful to have him in my life and have these moments where I know he’s telling me that it’s all going to be ok.

I can always rely on Kevin to remind me of my historical heft and for pictures to shock me, just like they did 2 years ago. It might just be the stimulation I need to get back to that same mindset I had. This photo wasn’t even of me at my biggest either and that’s what shocks me more 🤦🏻‍♀️ I think it was September 2019 and I’ve definitely got chubbier face photos from January 2020 to prove I was even bigger. The expression on my face also reminds me how grumpy I used to be because I was always tired and always reluctant to move because I was so uncomfortable and flabby. I would have to sit down regularly if we were “on the move” and that weekend in Glasgow, we did a lot of walking, and I was miserable. I just don’t want to be that version of me ever again, but I also don’t want to live in fear of becoming that version again. I need to find the right level of acceptance and comfort in the way I am now before I’ll be able to use that love for further progress. Or would negative thoughts about my current size help to spur me on with new vigour?

Who knows? All I can do is trust and continue on the same path for now. Hoping that it leads me away from temptation and a restored sense of peace. Kevin bought me the health documentaries I like to watch for Christmas, so that I can watch them without having to take out free trials or change my VPN etc. So once I’ve got a few imminent deadlines out of the way, I will watch these again and be reminded of the health-facts that seemed to work on changing me before.

[bebepac]

A Piece of Heaven on Earth Part 7: The Epilogue

This is the final installment of this series.  This is also day 15 of Choices Monthly challenge for “Family” 

Series:  A Piece of Heaven on Earth The Book  (TRR no royals)  Word Count: 4626 Pairing: Liam x Riley Ratings and Warnings:  Teen / Character death Song Inspiration: A Thousand Years by Christina Perri Song Inspiration: Can’t Help Falling in Love by Haley Reinhart Movie Inspiration: Just Like Heaven

Summary:  We see Riley and Liam in the present, their first trip together, and their future together.

Original Post: 05/11/22 at 9:05PM EST. 

A/N:  This is very special to me.  So please be kind.  I’m writing this as a tribute story to my Riley FC, the late Cheslie Kryst, in a way to deal with my grief which has almost been consuming my life.  I started following her in 2019 when I was watching the Miss USA pageant.  I rooted for her immediately.  Not only was she from my home state, but she was just this bright twinkling light on stage, she was a minority, like me. So when I came to the fandom in January 2020 and started writing stories for TRR I picked her as my Riley FC because she embodied what I wanted my “Riley” character to be.  Even in her untimely passing, I am still finding out more about her life and I have written her pretty accurately, even down to having depression.  So I will say it again.  If you need help please reach out.

A/N2:  I feel like I have created something really beautiful that I’m extremely proud of.  I hope you have enjoyed my take on the movie Just Like Heaven.  Thank you all of those how have been reading, commenting and reblogging, it really means a lot having support for this story line.  It’s really special for me. 

A/N3:  Thank you @secretaryunpaid​ for the beautiful mood board I added to my masterlist for this series and the Liam and Riley picture in New York.  Thank you much.  

A/N4: Thank you @21-wishes​ for mentioning about Nico and wondering why he was clingy, this made me add a conversation between Riley and him that I think now was needed.  

That… first… night…. Together as an official couple was by far the most intimate night Liam and Riley had spent together.

 And it wasn’t intimate sexually, it was emotionally intimate.  All they did was talk and hold each other the whole night.  Riley had never experienced something like that before in her life, that had made her feel so close to another,  and both of them fought back tears.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”  Liam whispered.  He gently stroked her face and used  his thumb to gently brush away the tears on her cheeks.  Finally her eyes met his,  there were tears on his cheeks as well.

"I could ask you the same thing Liam."

They didn't have to say what they were feeling as they were sure the other knew. They had both endured a very emotional and almost traumatic experience over the past few months, that both were sure even though they didn't want to admit it, to make the other feel better, they had made plans both were sure the other would not be able to keep. They both believed Riley would die.  

“It just feels like a dream, how long I’ve wanted to touch you, and finally, I can.  All of this feels like a dream I’m going to wake up from at any second.”

“I feel the same Liam.  And for once, nothing’s wrong. Everything feels right. It feels perfect.”  

“Almost….Well not quite.”  

“What’s wrong Liam?”  

Liam went to Riley’s bedroom door, opening it.  

Chance perked up from his dog bed on the floor by the couch. 

 Liam tapped his hand against his leg.  Chance jumped up from his dog bed.

“Come on boy, you’re sleeping with us tonight.  I know why you locked him out, and I get it, Riley  but he had a hand in us making it back together too. There’s something you don’t know.”

Chance excitedly ran into the room jumping on the bed with Riley. Liam returned to bed with them both and  explained his conversation with Olivia, and Chance’s part in finding him in the park.  

Riley hugged Chance, kissing his snout.

“Good Boy!  You’re the bestest boy.  But you’re a stinker, I almost had a heart attack trying to run to catch up to you!!!!”  

“You looked like you were having one too.”  Liam laughed loudly.

“Not funny Liam.”

“Says you,  I found it absolutely hilarious. I knew you weren’t coming down that hill.”

“Yeah, because I would have had to walk back up it.” 

Liam roared in laughter.  

“I’m going to get my endurance back!”

“I think I know a few exercises that can help you with that. Some you need a partner for.”  

The soft rumble of Liam’s voice, and the look of desire in his eyes, made Riley’s heart race.  She had fantasies of him, and the look in his eyes, the way he held her close, and the feeling of ‘something else’, that was hard against her made her very sure that when it finally did happen for the two of them, she wouldn’t be disappointed.

“I know it’s not our first night together really, and trust me when I say, I want nothing more than to have my lips touch every part of you, 

but I need this more right now,  just to be near you, and to hold you.”

Riley released the grip she had on his shirt, her fingertips raking his chest.  Liam groaned.

“You’re not playing fair Riley.”  

“Oops.”

Liam raised an eyebrow as he used his fingertip to trace the plunging neckline of Riley’s top she was wearing.  Her eyes closed and she exposed more of her neck to him.  Liam kissed the sensitive skin  just below her earlobe, and her body trembled as a tiny whimper escaped her lips.   They both stared at each other.  Fantasies danced in both of their minds, and both knew their thoughts could be a reality if they just gave in to those carnal impulses they were both having.

“You’re playing a very dangerous game Riley. One I really want to play.”  

“Is that so?”  

Chance let out an attention seeking grumble that made both of them look in his direction.

“Thank you boy,  we needed that. At least tonight."

He smiled at Riley.

“So many tried to help us.  Taylor came to see me.  I gave up, when I saw you respond to Nico’s kiss.  She convinced me to come see you at the hospital, and I did, but you had been discharged.”  

“She talked to me a lot in generalities, and when I broke up with Nico,  I came to see you at the apartment, but you had already moved out.”  

“No wonder we needed help, we have the worst timing!”

Chance barked.

“I think he agrees with you Liam.”  

Chance curled up at their feet, giving Liam and Riley the opportunity to continue talking, laughing, and holding each other close.

Riley took Liam to see her parents, and she wanted to explain the unique circumstances to which they first met, and how they were now a couple.

“Ren you did what?!?!?!"

Her father was mad, but there was an impressed glint in his eye. Ren never liked guns, even when he had taught her how to shoot them.

“Liam,  thank you.”  Her father said, giving Liam a firm handshake.

“You’re welcome sir.”

“So you two are already going to take a trip together?”  

“Yes, we’re going to New York next week.”  

“You two barely know each other.”  

“Jason….”  

“They don’t, and they are going to fly cross country together?”  

“Because life is short, and I almost lost my life.  Don’t look at me like that, I’m not blaming you Dad.  We promised to take this trip together when all I thought I had was hours left to live. I promised him that we’d go when I didn’t think there was any hope.  So we’re going to go. I wasn’t asking for your permission, I was just letting you know I’d be gone next week.”  

"She'll be safe with me, I promise."

Her father looked Liam over.

"Are you two staying for dinner? I'm thinking about lighting up the grill."

Liam looked at Riley before answering, should he answer?

"Sure."

Her father left the room and her mother disappeared as well. However she returned quickly with two beers.

"Liam honey, how about you take these outside and give Jason a hand with the grill."

"I'll do that."

Riley rubbed Liam's shoulder affectionately.  "You'll be fine,'' she whispered.

After a bit Riley and her mom went into the kitchen to start preparing some side dishes while watching her father with Liam by the grill. Both were talking and  she saw a small smile on her father's face.  

“See he’s fine.  Your Dad is warming up to him.”  

There was a blaze of fire and Liam jumped back.

“Lukewarm, but getting warm.”  her mom corrected.  

New York!

“Are you as excited as I am?”  

Riley nodded.  They sat in silence for a few moments  as the plane taxied in on the runway in New York.  

“We’re here, we’re really here Liam.”  

“I got us a room at the Hotel Belleclaire. It's less than a mile from central park.”

“Sounds amazing.”  

“We’ll go and get settled and head out and grab some dinner.”

Well they got to the room, and put down their things, but decided not to leave. The view was beautiful and there were other things on Liam and Riley’s mind. They instead ordered room service and spent the night together.  Neither was disappointed by that decision, as it had been a while for both since they had been intimate with someone. 

“Okay we really need to leave the room today Liam.  Like for real.   We need to do some legit New Yorker sightseeing today. Put Little Liam away.”

“Hey, I take offense to that.”  

“Okay please put larger than average Liam away then, so we can get showered and dressed and do some touristy sightseeing today. And you can trust I’m being honest, because I’m a doctor. 

Is that better for your ego?”  

“Actually, yes, it is.”

“Get up!”  

She pulled him by the arm, and Liam sat up in the bed, the robe Riley was wearing slid off her left shoulder a bit, showing her glowing skin.  He pulled her back close to him.  

“I mean it, get out of bed.”

“You’re beautiful.  I love you.”  

“I love you.”      

She kissed his lips softly.  “Get out of bed.”  

“Okay.”

Liam couldn’t help but snap pictures of the scenery and Riley on the streets of New York.

They went for a walk in the park getting Nathan’s hot dogs for  a late lunch.  

It was just amazing to be in this place with Riley that he never thought he would. 

They went to  the Statue of Liberty, and yes even though Liam loved his surroundings, the city he had always wanted to visit, and now he was with someone he truly cared deeply for, it only paled in comparison to the fact that he was sharing these moments with her. New York didn’t matter.  Riley mattered more.  Every second he was with her breathed more life into him.  Her smile, her laugh, the way she gently held onto his arm while they walked was everything he ever wanted.  The funniest thing that happened  was the wind catching Riley's hair on that cool  second blustery day of exploring the city and he got it on camera.

The days whizzed by and before long they were back at home from vacation, and Riley was finally back at work, and she dived back into work,  with the same passion.  She decided, she decided to scale back hours a bit.  

Riley had a momentary break, so she was doing some charting and dictation when she heard a knock on the door.  She checked the time, it was an hour until lunch and Liam would be swinging by soon to pick her up.  

“May I come in?”  

“Nico… sure.”  

He closed the door behind him.  More than two months had passed and they hadn’t really talked to each other since that night other than simple pleasantries.

“Do you have a few minutes that we can talk?”  

“Sure, would you like to have a seat?”  

“Yeah Thanks RB…. Riley…”  

Nico’s face reddened and he fidgeted in his seat.

“So what is this about Nico?”  

He slowly looked up until his eyes finally met hers.  “Riley I’m sorry for how I acted towards you.”

“It’s okay.”  

“No it’s not okay, because you don’t understand.  You can’t understand Riley.”

“Then tell me.”  

“You let me kiss you that day Riley. You would barely let me touch you before. But you let me kiss you.”  

“I did…”  

“Do you know what that was like for me?  You never gave me a second look before. It was like I finally caught  a rainbow in my hands.  I saw the way he looked at you Riley.  I knew that I was on borrowed time. You were going to remember him eventually. So I held on to you so tight because I hoped I would convince you to love me back.  And I tried to make you insecure in your choice by saying you couldn’t even remember him so he had to be a shitty choice. I really wanted you to love me back.  But you couldn’t. Because he had your heart, and now you’ve made promises to each other.”  

His eyes traveled down to her engagement ring.  

“Yes, we’re getting married.”

“You deserve happiness and a good man Riley.  I know he’s good to you.  I wish I could have been the man you lean on.  But I know  I have some growing up to do.”

Both of them heard yelling coming from outside the closed door.  

“What in the world?”

Both Riley and Nico walk out of the office to see a woman charging in his direction, a young boy following close behind her.  

“Shit….”  Nico groaned.

“NICO! You are the hardest person to catch up with.”

“Daphne….”  

“You don’t answer your phone or emails.  So maybe this will get your attention.”  

She threw the manila envelope at him.   “You’ve been served for child support.”  

Riley was shocked but not surprised, staring between the two of them.  

“Are you his new  side piece?”  

“Oh no!!!! Totally not it.  I’m not a part of this.”  

Daphne’s eyes refocused on Nico.  “Spend some time with your son. His name is Nicolai. I’ll be back later. There's something I have to handle.”  

The woman walked away leaving the little boy standing in front of her and Nico.  

There was no denying the fact the child was his. Nicolai was a carbon copy of Nico.

Nico looked at Riley.  

“What do I do?”  

“Well, remember that growing up you mentioned you had to do?  That apparently starts now, Nico.  I’ve got some patients to check in on.”

Riley walked away from Nico leaving him speechless standing with the little boy.

 She sighed, she had really dodged a bullet with him.  She glanced once more at the little boy as she walked away.  Sorry your dad is man whore, she thought.

Six Months and three days later

They picked that day as their wedding date because it meant so much to them.  A year ago to the day of their first kiss.  They were here.

“I feel like a Queen,”  She said as she smiled.  Liam was stunned into silence when he saw Riley.  She was twirling in her wedding dress.  

“LIAM!!!! You’re not supposed to be here!!!!!”

Taylor ran up to him to cover his eyes.  

Liam laughed.

“Do you realize how much stuff we have been through that says we shouldn’t have made it to this point and we did? Riley, a superstition isn’t going to keep me away from you for another second."

“Taylor, let him go.”  

Liam stepped closer to her completely enamored with her.

“You look beautiful Riley.”  

“You clean up nice yourself.  You’re right, Based on the overwhelming odds, when we met, there was no way we’re going to be here.  But I’m glad we are.”

“Me too.”

“It’s a good thing I’m not fully dressed yet,  so I still get to have my bridal moment.  And that’s all that matters.   You looking all googly eyed right now is great, but I’m gonna need my bridal moment Liam.”

“Yes Ma’am let me get out of here then, so you can finish getting ready.  I love you Mrs. soon to be Riley Rys.”

“Um, didn’t you know, you’re taking my last name.  We’re going as Dr. and Mr. Brooks.”        

"Okay. Should I prepare my face scowl now or later, if I'm going to be Mr. Brooks?”

The whole room laughed.

"That wasn't funny."

Riley’s dad stood at the door.

Ren patted his shoulder.  

“Honey, yes it was. Everyone on earth knows your scowl.”  

Liam kissed Riley’s cheek.

“I better go. I can’t wait to see you out there.  I’ll be the one standing up front looking even more googly eyed when you walk in having your bridal moment.”  

Riley laughed.

“Good to know, didn’t know how I’d find you otherwise.”  

“He’s really grown on me.”  

“He’s a great man, Mom.  I love him.”  

Riley, with the help of her mom, sister, and sister-in-law finished getting ready, having a few special moments between the girls.

“Let’s go and get me married.”  Riley screeched excitedly.  

Liam and Riley had decided on an outside wedding, and this garden was one of Liam’s new public renovated creations.  When he designed it, he knew this was where he would marry Riley.

Chance walked in with Taylor,  on a bedazzled leash, being the cutest little ring bearer ever.  Where she found a tux that matched Liam’s for a dog, he’d never know, but he actually kind of loved it.  

Then last but definitely not least, Riley made her entrance with her father at her side. She had her bridal moment watching Liam’s reaction.  He had already seen her dress, but the way he stared at her, and he grabbed his heart, the tears filling his eyes, and his smile. 

 It was  finally happening for them.  

“You know I always had a good feeling about these two.  Look at them!  Aren’t they so damn stinking cute?!?!  They legit look like the wedding toppers on top of the wedding cake and not just any wedding cake, the one you see in the bakery that’s in the front window to make you go in and buy a damn wedding cake.

Hell I’m not even getting married and I would buy a wedding cake, if the toppers looked like you two on it.  I just want to pinch both your cheeks.”  

“LEO!!!!!”

“Right.  Right.  We’re supposed to be having a wedding here.  The lovely bride and groom are giving us all the gift of an open bar, so I thought this was the least I could do.”

“Did you already visit it?”  Riley asked.  

The crowd laughed, and Liam shook his head.

“You would think, but I pre-gamed at home a little beforehand.”

“I ain’t mad.”  Liam responded. “That’s my brother.” 

“Riley that is why I love that you found my brother the way you did.  You bring something very special out in him.  I’ve never seen him smile so big, and laugh so much.  And I’m so grateful that you are here with us and this day was able to happen. I’m so happy that after today, you’re going to be part of our family.”

“Leo….”  

“I knew you were family when you shot me the bird that night, and what my brother was willing to do to help you.  I had to ride shotgun for that!  You turned my brother into a passionate madman.  You truly light a fire in his heart.”  

“Thank you Leo.”

“I know, I know. We’re going to ruin our makeup! Let’s get on with it shall we, you two wrote your own vows Liam, how about you start this love fest off.”  

“Thanks brother.  My brother took just a little bit of my thunder but that’s okay.  I’m going to start by saying, Life is full of near misses, and we had enough to last a lifetime.  The way we met that first time is nothing short of miraculous, and even with the points where we were just outside of each other’s orbits, you still found me Riley.  You changed me Riley.  You gave me the reason, you made me want to live again, and fight for what I love.  I was a shell of a man, a ghost of a man, walking this earth until you filled me with your love.  You changed me for the better. I wasn’t looking for a soulmate when we met, I felt like I didn’t even have a soul anymore.  Now my heart is full again, and I can’t wait to spend my life with you, loving you and being the man by your side for the rest of my life.”

“Liam, you saved me.  I can’t say it any other way than that.  I don’t know why I didn’t believe that I could have, or didn’t deserve a love like the one I have with you.  I had seen that type love all around me, but it never happened for me. You were cranky and I was just a little bit obnoxious….”

“A little bit?”  Liam asked with a smile.

“Okay, incredibly obnoxious in my song choices, but somehow you broke down the defensive walls I had built around myself and you showed me love.  My soul found you to show me what l was missing from my life.  A love that I thought wasn’t out there for me.  I’m looking forward to spending all my days, and all my nights as your wife.”  

Liam pulled his collar, and his cheeks flushed.  He couldn’t wait for tonight.

“Now that rings have been exchanged and vows have been made,  I have to ask and I know the answer is no, but if there’s anyone here that sees why this absolutely beautiful cake topping looking beautiful couple shouldn’t be joined in holy matrimony……  keep your damn mouth shut. Because they’re beautiful and this is love damnit.”  

Everyone laughed again,  Riley was so right asking Leo to get licensed as the officiant for their  wedding.  

“So by the powers invested in me by “so you want to murry people dot org, the online class based out of Louisiana I took to become an officiant, which also taught me how to do a low country boil,  Liam and Riley I now pronounce you as husband and wife, so seal it with a kiss, so we can get the after party started!”

Their first kiss as husband and wife was how every kiss felt with the two of them,  fire and passion.   And Riley could almost feel her Dad scowling at them.  

They had a whirlwind love.  That first year of marriage was full of changes for them.  Liam had restarted his business and was traveling a little more, but made it home every night to Riley.  Riley decided to actually leave the hospital and started working in a pediatric doctor’s office, that gave her more freedom in her schedule.  And it wasn’t long before they needed their own pediatric doctor.  Liam and Riley were married fourteen months when they welcomed identical twin girls into their lives, Madelyn and Addelyn.

Their first Halloween they dressed up Madi and Addie in a Bee and Ladybug costume respectfully.  

“And why is it we’re taking the girls trick or treating?  We know we’re not giving them any of this candy. They’re  way too small to eat any of the haul we could get with them.”  

“One we have the cutest little girls Liam, and two, people will be throwing candy at us because they are so cute.  Look at them! I am eating my weight in Halloween candy tonight.”  

Liam nodded.  Riley’s logic made sense.

“Heck look at us. They might give us candy because we look cute. You make a very cute Ladybug Liam.”  

“Heck yes I do, Ladybugs can be boys! Now let’s go shake down this city for some candy for my girls.”  

“God I love you Liam Rys!”

“I love you more Riley Rys.”  

Before they had known it ten more years had passed.  Their girls were eleven, soon to be twelve  and about to start Junior High in the fall.

“Mom?”  

Riley immediately jumped up from her desk opening the door, seeing both daughters holding hands and teary eyed.  

“What’s wrong Madi? Addie?”

Madi, the oldest spoke for the two, her voice shaking.

“There’s something wrong with Chance.”

“Where is he?”

Both pointed down the hall.  

Riley grabbed her phone, and walked down the hall to the bonus room, finding Chance laying on the floor whimpering.  

“It’s okay boy.”   She gently stroked his back for a few moments before calling Liam.

“Riley what’s wrong?”  

“Can you come home Liam? It’s Chance.  I think it’s time.”  

“I’ll be right there.  I’ll call the vet on the way.”  

“Hurry.”

“Go downstairs and wait for Dad to get home, he’s on the way.”  

“Okay Mom.”  

“You’re the bestest boy Chance.”  She lightly stroked  his snout looking at him  not being able to hold back her tears.  Not even ten minutes passed before Liam arrived.  He hugged Riley while she cried.  

“It’s time Liam.  Look at him.”  

“I know.  He’s had a good life. We should take the girls with us, they would want to say goodbye to him too.”  

Riley swaddled Chance in his favorite blanket and Liam picked him up.  

“Girls we’re all going to take Chance to the vet together. We need to leave now.” 

Liam led and the girls followed behind Riley.  

“I’ll sit back here with him.”  

Riley climbed into the trunk of the SUV first, and then Liam handed Chance to her.  

There was a heavy silence in the car on the way to the vet.  Liam didn’t even notice he hadn’t turned on the music at all.  They just listened to Riley whispering to Chance saying how good of a boy he was and how much everyone loved him..

Riley and Liam were immediately ushered back to one of the rooms with Chance.

“Chance isn’t going to be okay, is he Madi?”  

“I don’t think so Addie. This looks bad. Mom and Dad are really upset.”  

A few minutes later only Liam came back out of the room.  He put on a stoic face for his daughters even though his heart felt like it was breaking.

“Girls, Chance isn’t doing well.  He’s thirteen, that’s very old for a dog like him,  and it’s time for us to say goodbye.”

“Now?”  Madi inquired.

“Yes, it’s time.”  

“I don’t want to say goodbye to Chance.  He’s always been here. He sleeps on my bed at night.��  

“Addie…”  But Liam didn’t know what to say and he didn’t want to force her.

“I don’t want to Dad!!!”  Addie burst into tears.

Madi took her hand.  “Addie, we’ll do it together. If you don’t say goodbye, he’ll wonder where you are.  You know you’re his favorite next to Mom.”  

Madi was just like Riley, she said what Liam couldn’t to give Addie that little extra courage she needed.

Liam smiled at the girls. 

“That’s right  you are.  You and Mom never have cold feet or laps when Chance is around.”  

Liam held out one hand for each of his daughters.  “Be brave.  We can do this. I don’t want to say goodbye either, but we need to.”  

Hearing their father admit his sadness, made the girls immediately hug him.  They went back into the small room with Chance, Riley and the vet.

“I’ll give you all a few minutes.”  The vet left the room, giving the small family some privacy.  

One by one everyone affectionately petted and talked to Chance.  It seemed to have a calming effect on him.      

Riley nodded when the vet reentered the room.  

“I’m going to give him the medication now.”  

“Will he feel pain?”  

“No Addie, there is no pain. Chance will just fall asleep.”  

Liam hugged the girls in his arms while Riley sat in front of him whispering “You’re the bestest boy, Chance. We’ll miss you. We love you so much.”  

He didn’t want to leave them; he loved them. What would he do without them? Then he heard her voice whispering to him.

“Flea Bag? I know you can hear me.”  

“He’s gone.”  

Chance stood on the other side of  himself watching  his family crying for him.

Riley stood and everyone pulled her close into the hug with them.

“Flea Bag.  You did good. You raised a beautiful family.  Look at them.”  Olivia said. “None of them are dead, and they have all  their limbs still intact.  You were a good boy.  

I guess I can call you Chance now. You deserve it.”

Chance barked.

“Okay, you can hang out with me for a bit, until I get tired of you.  I don’t know how all this works, but know I’m not cleaning up ghost dog poop.”  

He remembered when it was just him and Riley, and then Liam came along.  Then the babies Madi and Addie were born, with all of their baby smells, and he could tell them apart just by smell. Madi had the best smells.  She smelled like Riley. Their family of five had been complete for a while. Now without him, they  would be a family of four.

Olivia glanced at Liam and Riley with their arms wrapped around their daughters, all in an emotionally grieving moment for Chance. Liam had made a beautiful family with her.

“Flea Bag… errr. Chance, they will be okay, and so will you. Maybe we can come back and check on them from time to time, but for now,  let’s go.”  

Chance glanced at his family one last time before leaving with Olivia.

Liam and Riley wiped the tears of their daughters and hugged and kissed both again.  

“Let’s go home.”

Liam opened the doors for Riley and the girls to get into the SUV.  

As the drove down the street, he took Riley’s hand and kissed it.  

It made the girls smile because they were used to their parents being a little more affectionate than their friend’s parents.      

That night the family ordered a  large pizza and opened Tahitian treats.  

“This meal, girls, is the first meal your father and I ate on our first real date together.”  Riley said, smiling at Liam.  

“I know we’re all sad right now, but we thought we’d tell you the story of how me and your mom met, and your fur brother Chance had a very huge part of that story of bringing the two of us together.”    

“He did?”  

“Yes Addie, he did.”   Liam kissed her forehead.

“Once upon a time…….”

Thank you for being a part of this emotional journey with me.  I hope that you enjoyed this series and my tribute to a wonderful person that left this world way too soon, the beautiful, kind, and intelligent Cheslie C. Kryst. 

#bebepac writes #a piece of heaven on earth #liam x riley forever #choices fanfiction #choices fic writers creations #choices monthly challenge #play choices #you will always be my riley

[thiswasneverthat]

Lost You

Pairing: Bangchan x Female Reader

Word count: 3.1K

Genre: Angst, romance, slight smut

✩ Masterlist 

January 2019.

"Happy new year, love," Chan whispered to your ear as he had both of his arms securely wrapped around your middle.

You blew out a long and contented sigh as you leaned back against his toned chest. Your fingertips were drawing circles on the back of his hand. You really couldn't be happier for the new year. You have your boyfriend with you, and the fireworks were decorating the night sky so beautifully.

You couldn't deny that you were indeed the happiest when you were with him, even just doing the simple things like watching the night sky together from the balcony of his apartment.

"What's your plan for the first day of the new year?" You asked as you slightly tilted your head to look at him.

"I have a few things on my list, but the most important one is to lay you down on the bed and make love to you. What do you say?"

You turned around to stare at him before circling your arms around his neck. A slight sneer then crept up to your face. "I'd probably say no just to get in your nerves and I'll end up getting punished."

March 2019.

"Chan, what are you doing?" You lowly hissed through gritted teeth as your grip around his arm tightened.

"What? I didn't do anything." He answered nonchalantly as the corner of his lips tugged up to form a smirk. His right hand was still hidden underneath your knee-length black dress, working its magic in between your legs.

"You'll pay for this." You tried to utter the words menacingly, however, it came out as a low whine instead. You discreetly condemned yourself for that. You have the dignity to uphold, moreover in a public space. Yet, ignoring his assaulting fingers against your clothed pussy wasn't exactly an easy task.

"Should we go home instead? Oh, but the movie had just started." Chan suggested in a teasing tone and you instantly rolled your eyes.

At the sight of you struggling to keep yourself calm and quiet while focusing the movie on the big screen, Chan couldn't help but let out a chuckle.

"Oh God, I hate you." You mewled weakly as you brought your head closer to the crook of his neck. Your hand was gripping tightly on his arm, seeking support as your legs began to tremble.

"Lighten up, baby. It's your birthday." He whispered next to your ear as he rubbed the pad of his thumb against your clit.

June 2019.

You were cooking dinner in the kitchen when Chan came home from work with a frown on his face. You glanced at the clock on the wall and the time showed that it was almost eight.

"Hey babe, how's work?" You called out when you noticed the way he just plopped down on the couch. It wasn't like him.

"Exhausting." He answered simply without bothering to look at you.

"You want to shower first? And then we can have dinner together?" You suggested as you approached him in the living room. You sat next to him and reached for his hand.

"I'll take a shower and go to bed, I think. I've had a burger at the office earlier." He let out a heavy sigh as he rose from the couch. "You can eat by yourself, right?"

For a moment, you were too stunned to speak. Something might have gone wrong. There must be things that have been bothering him lately. Because, to be honest, it didn't go unnoticed by you how he had changed these past few weeks.

August 2019.

It had been a week since Chan went out of town for a business trip. You missed him so much. It had been pure torture to be far away from him. The previous night, you both only managed to talk on the phone for about five minutes because he was swamped with piles of works.

And tonight, it was close to midnight and he still hadn't called. You were contemplating calling him or waiting for him to call you first. You didn't want to disturb him while he was working. But he must have finished his work at this hour, you thought.

So, you immediately seized your phone from the drawer and dialled his number. The lines were ringing for a brief moment before an unfamiliar voice answered the call.

"Yeah, who's there?" The person on the other side of the phone call asked curtly. It was a girl.

A frown automatically formed on your forehead. Why would a girl answer Chan's phone? Where is Chan?

"Who am I talking to? Where's Chan?" You questioned in a firm tone.

"He is at the bathroom. You can call him again tomorrow."

What the fuck?

You didn't like it, not even a bit. The fact that a girl was answering Chan's phone for him and the way she talked.. Oh God, you hated it.

"No. Who are you, anyway? I need to talk to my boyfriend." You insisted and emphasised the last word.

"He is busy, really. And I am busy too. Call again tomorrow."

And before you could say anything more, you heard a loud thud from the other side. You assumed that the phone was being thrown away against a hard surface.

"Fuck it." You hissed as you shut your eyes. You were reeling and you hated it. You didn't want to think about anything. You didn't want the negative thoughts invading your mind. It could be his co-workers with a personality issue.

However, when you were about to put your phone on the top of the drawer, you realised that the phone call was still connected. With a furrowed brow, you brought the phone next to your ear.

"You smell so good."

Fuck. How many times have you said fuck tonight?

But for the love of God, it was his voice. It was Chan.

"You like it?"

"You know, I love it."

"And that's the only thing you love, Christopher?"

"There are more, especially when you are wearing nothing like this."

Fuck. What the fuck??

October 2019.

More than a month had passed since you broke up with Chan and it still felt like yesterday for you. Not a single day passed without you thinking about him. It was like your life revolved around him. Or maybe it was, still.

You couldn't tell which one hurt you more, his absence in your life or his betrayal. Until this very moment, you were still wondering what had gone wrong. Was it you? Was it something you said or did? Or.. he just simply fell out of love with you.

At that time you confronted him about the excruciating thing you heard over the phone, his only response was 'how did you know?'

Unbelievable, indeed.

You couldn't quite believe what you heard but right at that moment, you knew it was the end for the two of you. Every single memory from the four years you spent together only caused you pain now.

"You know it's okay to cry. I won't judge you."

You snorted before squinting your eyes at your friend who was sitting next to you. "So funny of you to think I still have the strength to cry."

"I thought it was just as natural as breathing for you, I mean, to cry over him."

"Please, the last thing I need now is your scathing remarks, Lee Minho."

He threw his head back as a hearty laugh slipped off his mouth. Sometimes you wonder why was he your best friend. The thing he did best was to laugh at you when you were having a hard time. But, he was always there for you when you needed him.

"It's his birthday today, isn't it?" Minho asked once his laughter subsided.

"How did you know?"

"How could I not? I even remember every little surprise you did for his birthday these past few years."

You sighed. Minho was right, about the birthday and the surprises. Today of all days, you missed him the most. You missed him with every fibre of your being. You wondered if he had any plans to spend his birthday this year.

"Let it out, just cry as much as you want. Scream your lungs out, if you must. But, even love has limits, you know?" Minho continued as he gently rubbed your back.

"I know, I know." You heaved a long sigh as you force a smile. "You're the most annoying person but thank you for always being here for me."

"You know you'll never find someone like me." Minho quipped before pulling you into his arms.

He was right. Love has a limit, or that was the way you'd like to believe. And that being said, you were somehow convinced that your misery also has a limit. You won't suffer from heartbreak forever, right? It was so fucking painful right now but you will be okay eventually.

December 2021.

If there was a contest of the happiest person on earth right now, you would most likely come out as the winner. How could you not? The next day when the sun shines on the horizon, you would be married to the love of your life. You would be married to the man who made your head spin every time he kissed you, the man who made your blood sing every time he touched you.

Two years ago, if someone tell you that one day you would be this happy, you'd laughed to their face. But life was full of surprises, you have realised it by now.

You remembered how it felt when you were at your breaking point, when you felt like you were not going anywhere with your life. Like you got stuck in the same shit all over again. And now, looking back to those dark days, you could only smile to yourself. You wanted to pat yourself on the back, thanking yourself for holding your ground in the storm.

You were drowning in your sea of thoughts with a smile on your face, and you didn't realise there was a knock on your front door. Only when your dog suddenly jumped up to your lap, you finally snap out of it.

"Oh hey, are we inviting someone over tonight? No, right?" You purred to your dog as you held the tiny furry creature in your arms before getting up from the couch and making your way to your front door.

You weren't expecting any guests, but you assumed maybe it was just a last-minute delivery. Well, you ordered quite a lot of online stuff for your wedding preparation. Could it be the lingerie? Or the new pillow for your new house? You smiled widely at the thought.

However, the smile that was plastered on your face immediately faltered at the moment the door flew open. Your eyes twitched, seemingly refusing to concede the sight before you. Still carrying your dog in your arms, you stood motionless. Your breath hitched in your throat and your brain turned hazy.

"Hey." Your guest greeted you with a timid smile, the voice was gentle but laced with hesitation.

That voice. That fucking voice you haven't heard for more than two years.

You felt your heart throbbed, causing you to discreetly jolt out of your deep thoughts. After the realisation hit you so hard, you abruptly put your dog down on the floor.

"Why are you here?" You breathed out. Your gaze was glued to him, even though you didn't intend to. Your mind seemed to be functioning on its own.

"Uh.." He cleared his throat, evidently weighing his words. "I just... I want to apologize."

Did you hear that right? Apologize?

As if it was automatic, you scoffed at his words. You stared at him in disbelief. Or more like in disdain.

After two freaking years?

"Just go." The words rolled out of your lips so casually. Your own voice caught you by surprise, it didn't shake at all.

"Please. Hear me out." He pleaded as he took a step forward, causing you instantly to flinch, which he noticed.

And right at that moment, you thought you saw something in his eyes, something like despair. But maybe you were wrong.

"I owe you nothing." You replied sharply. Your voice came out harsher than you intended.

"I know. I swear." He was quick to chime in. "You don't owe me anything, but I do. Please."

More than you'd like to admit, to see him standing right in front of you seemed like a dream. Two years had passed since the last time you saw him, so many things also had changed ever since. One of them was your feeling. And now, you just couldn't bring yourself to care about what he wanted to say.

"Why does it matter now? After two fucking years? Is it so hard for you to believe that I am finally over it?" You had no idea where did you acquire the strength to say that to him, but you just did.

"No. That's not what I meant, I just-"

"Just what? Just want to say that it took you two years to apologize for cheating on me?" You snapped at him. And surprisingly, your voice came out like a squeak.

For whatever reason, you were suddenly fuming. It was perhaps the mention of cheating that still hurt you. Or it was simply the realisation. Two years. Why it took him two fucking years to apologize? Did he run out of girls to mess with now? And that was why he came to see you?

You hated it. You hated how the brick walls you have built to safeguard your heart seemed to be waiting for the right time to crumble anytime now.

You were fine. You were living a happy life with your fiancé. Were you overestimating yourself all this time? It was ludicrous how the sight of him had this much impact on you. How was that even possible?

"I truly am sorry, I know even a trillion apologize won't make up for what I did. But, all this time, I just thought I would be fine. I am waiting for the time that I would be fine. It has been so long, yet.. after you left, I still couldn't get you out of my head. I couldn't-"

"Fucking stop. Just stop." You cut him off harshly. You detested the way your heart was aching to hear those words. It wasn't supposed to feel that way. Was it? What the hell is wrong with you?

"Please.. There's nothing more in life that I regret than to let you go."

Regret, he said? Bullshit.

"What's good is regret after all this time?" You asked with a burst of mocking laughter.

"I live with regret since the very night you left. And I am sorry because I am a coward. I came to see you the day after you left, but I just stood in front of your door, right where I am standing now. I heard you sobbing and I knew.. I knew I wouldn't have the strength to look into your eyes without breaking my heart."

For a brief moment, you froze. Your head felt heavy. You knew you shouldn't believe anything that came out of his mouth, you knew better than to let him get into your head but why was it so hard?

"I hate myself for hurting you. I should've come sooner but-"

"Enough." You cut him off for the second time. Your hands clenched tightly as you glanced up at the ceiling, holding back the tears that have been threatening to roll down your cheeks.

"What do I do? Please, tell me." He implored.

"Nothing." You said through gritted teeth. It was just getting harder for you. And with tears pooling in your eyes, you glared at him before you continued. "You know what, none of that matter now. I have been living my life just fine without you, so please, just go."

And the next thing that happened really caught you off guard. Your mouth was slightly agape and your eyes widened in shock. Because, instead of just walking away or at least trying to say something, he got down on his knees. His shoulders went limp, his head was hanging low.

You were too stunned to speak at the sight before you. Knowing him for years, you never once thought he would ever kneel for anything in his life.

"Forgive me." He said in almost a whisper. His voice was shaking.

You would be lying if you said your heart didn't shatter into pieces to see him like that. You'd be lying to deny that the soft spot in your heart for him was still there, even after everything that happened. And without you knowing, your tears rolled down your cheeks. It seemed that your walls finally crumble down.

"Chris, please.."

Well.. There, you said it. His name slipped out of your mouth for the first time in two years.

"Please, just go."

He shook his head firmly. "I can't."

Oh, God. Why is this happening to you? Right on the night before your wedding day?

Seconds went by and you felt your heart hurting even more. You immediately darted your gaze somewhere, you couldn't watch him like that any longer. You couldn't watch him like that without wanting to get down on your knees and wrap your arms around him.

No, no, no. Don't fuck this up. You mentally cursed yourself.

"Go away, I beg you. I am getting married tomorrow."

His head jerked up, he stared at you with teary eyes. "What?"

Using the back of your hand, you quickly wiped the tears on your cheeks before taking a deep breath. Your heart swelled to look at him. "I forgive you, Chris. It's all in the past now. Though, after that night, I honestly wished we never happened."

He said nothing. He just stared at you like his soul had left his body.

You then forced a smile on your face as you continued. "I am happy with my life now, and I know you will be too. Please, now, just go. Okay?"

The longer you stared at him, the more you felt the gnawing pain in your heart. And with a trembling hand, you reached for the doorknob.

"Take care, Christopher." You breathed out. Your voice was evidently shaking.

And the next second, without waiting for his response, you closed the door. 

#stray kids fanfiction #skz fanfiction #bangchan fanfiction #bangchan x reader #bangchan angst

[ledenews]

A Freeway's Facelift - I-70 Before, During One Swanky Makeover

re·bar /ˈrēbär/ noun - a steel reinforcing rod in concrete. And rebar is expected to remain hidden, too, because it’s a good sign of stability when the steel stays unseen. That wasn’t the case, though, with the piers supporting the 26 bridges along Interstate 70 in Ohio County. More than 60 years of wear, tear The federal highway was extended through the Northern Panhandle in the 1950s, and the connection to the west was completed when the Wheeling Tunnel opened in December 1966. Interstate 70 stretches from Baltimore, Md., to Cove Fort, Utah. The freeway crosses through 10 states and cities like Denver, Kansas City, Indianapolis, Columbus, and Wheeling, and the 14.5 miles in West Virginia is the shortest stretch in any of the states. This was one of my bridge piers that had eroded so much the stabilizing rebar was visible. And about half of that distance of roadway was a disaster before Gov. Jim Justice included the Wheeling work in his “Roads to Prosperity” campaign, and the state awarded Swank Construction the $214 million contract to replace or refurbish 26 bridges and ramps. Despite the coronavirus pandemic, the company made good on all project deadlines, and the Wheeling community was given back its “Main Street.” The Governor’s Office announced on January 27 the final cost of the I-70 project was $221,034,932.55. "Everyone said that this would be impossible, and it was going to take forever, and the traffic was going to be crazy, and everything under the sun," Gov. Justice said in a press release. "But lots and lots of people pulled the rope, did they not? Whether it was our great Jimmy Wristen, the Department of Transportation, Randy Damron, all the contractors, all the people that made this all happen, all the great city people, the workers, and all of our officials, we're so good in this state when we unleash us." A total of 24 spans needed to be re-decked during the two-year plan. A Sight Seldom Seen There was a plywood plank bolted to the belly of Interstate 70. That was the prescribed fix after a pothole progressed into a hole through the westbound span. “I don’t think anyone knew that’s how (the WVDOH) fixed issues like that until that photo was taken and published,” said W.Va. Del. Erikka Storch (R-4). “It makes sense when you think about it, but the way it looks is what shocked people. I know I had never seen anything like that before, but it was an example of just how bad the interstate was. “There was a lot of talk in Charleston about the project before it actually took place, but then these photos started showing up on social media and that pushed it forward for sure,” the lawmaker explained. “They said there wasn’t any danger that a bridge was going to collapse, but that’s not how it appeared. It looked like people were in danger.” A pothole made its way completely through a bridge in Elm Grove before the project began in late 2019. State Secretary of Transportation Jimmy Wriston described the 26-bridge project as “monstrous,” but no one told anybody what the massive makeover would look like. Only because of what veteran journalist Al Molnar did do we have an idea how the bridges’ skeletons would appear. Molnar, who passed at 87 years old in January 2016, was a newspaperman for the local Wheeling papers, and it was he who walked and hiked and climbed his way to the best vantage points of the construction of I-70 near Wheeling Tunnel. Most of the interstate’s spans needed repaired and redocked, but the “Fulton bridges” were in need of head-to-toe replacement, and that meant for detour routes along U.S. 40, or National Road through Wheeling. The growth of Interstate 70 was an attraction for Wheeling residents, including those working for the local media outlets. (Photo by Al Molnar) “And everyone, including me, thought it was going to be a nightmare,” Storch recalled. “But it wasn’t that bad because everyone was staying home because of Covid. Everyone was working from home or quarantining, and there just wasn’t that much traffic. I’m sure that let those workers just move right along. “I know everyone is relieved now that it’s over and reopened, but that work was way overdue. It shouldn’t have been allowed to get that bad,” said the lawmaker. “But I-70 should be good for a while.” It was an interesting site to see as the Swank construction workers stripped apart pieces of the spans that had stood for more than 60 years. The most work was before east of Wheeling Tunnel as Interstate 70 intersects with W.Va. Route 2. Scary scenes such as this one were prevalent for far too long before the $200 million-plus effort by the WVDOT. The WVDOH often performed bridge inspections before finally hiring Swank Construction to repair or replace the spans in Ohio County. Before construction, inspectors attempted to guide the workers with painted-on instructions. For month prior to the beginning of the project, inspectors circled in red the most obvious issues with each interstate pier. Constructing Interstate 70 extended a few years before all connections were made between Elm Grove and Wheeling Tunnel. (Photo by Al Molnar) As a part of the project, the Fort Henry Bridge was painted dark blue per requests from city officials. Read the full article

[freshthoughts2020]

PERCEPTION CHANGES

PERCEPTION CHANGES

January 30, 2022

One day I was listening to The Boy, (Drizzy Drake), I believe it was No Friends in the Industry, and I was like wow its crazy how menacing Drake sounds now. I remember when he was the bud of soft jokes, he may get those jokes still but its nowhere near how it was pre Nothing Was the Same. It had me thinking like man perception really changes.

Perception can be defined as “ a way of regarding, understanding, or interpreting something; a mental impression “. I vividly recall Drake’s original reception among rap fans. He was the loverboy way before CLB, but thats it, He was the guy who rapped extremely well but he was just a “soft guy” in his feelings. I never felt Drake was soft, if that’s the case everybody whoever made a R&B song is soft. People was letting his R&B side define him because that was extremely popular with women. So if you cater to women somehow you'‘re “soft”.

Anyways…

I believe perception started to changed for Drake starting with his 2015 release “If You’re Reading This Its Too Late”. Some may regard it as his best album and if it isn’t its definitely his most controversial release. As we all know, Drizzy’s pen was brought into question when Meek Mill exposed via twitter that Quentin Miller was the ghostwriter behind the most coveted singles on the project. Hip Hop purists were left flabbergasted, “oh no the boy didn’t write his raps for this album”, “how long has this going on???”, “is his 6pack even real"???!!”, by the way no one said that but pillars in the hip hop community were disappointed in the news. However, the real Drake fans did not give a single damn that he had help with his hits. We heard the demos, we were elated Quentin did not release the records as the main recording artist.

As most can recall when Meek called out Drake many thought it was the end of Aubrey Graham as we know it, and if this was to go into an audio world war, Meek and boisterous voice would surely come out the victor. What’s so ironic is, back in 2013 during our college days me and my roommates had a hypothetical argument about who would win in a battle, Drake or Meek Mill?

Me and one of my roommates instantly said Drake. My other roommate said Meek without a second thought and his reasoning was the same as any other rap fan, “Meek was a battle rapper this is what he do!!”. That mattered to me none beloved, I knew Drake is a perpetual student of the game and I recalled some spats he had during the Comeback Season era. I knew he would be more than ready but the world didn’t.

So Drake released Back to Back after the warning shot Charged Up and from this moment he began to look like the big bad wolf to me. Check it out, he drops Summer Sixteen which was basically a taunt for the first half of the song. Then he makes songs like Free Smoke, talking reckless saying anyone can get it. He gets so deep in his aggressive Drake rap bag people started rumors that he had XXXtentacion killed. And people supposedly had evidence! Wait… but this was just the guy everyone called soft but now people believe he’s capable of murdering bubbling rap stars.

It doesn’t make things better when he then drops a song called “Mob Ties” bragging about his “alleged” Houston street connections. It doesn’t stops there beloved, he gets on the 2019 song of the year, SICKO MODE and had everybody singing about driving down Ye’s block and shooting it up lmao! Oh you thought it was over??? No!! During the 2020 quarantine he dropped a viral tiktok inspired hit “Toosie Slide”. Everyone’s dancing but he spends the whole song basically talking about murdering someone and no one batted a eye! lmao.

So how did perception change from softest guy in the universe to 6God Badmon??! It’s quite simple actually,

I. CONSISTENCY

Often first impressions are last impressions, meaning what someone first meet you as that’s how you are always perceived at them. If you was the square dude that wasn’t known for having money or being flashy but years later you turn into a flashy street guy, no one’s gonna think hey that’s “flashy street guy”. They’re going to think why is “square basic dude” trying to be “flashy street guy”.

The only way we’ll believe “flashy street guy” is who he is, is if he consistently shows us that. We gotta see you flashing more than a year or two, and its gotta be gradual, you just can’t pop up on the gram with a stick in your hand when you just had a Charles Darwin book in your hand. Boy go sit down!!

Drizzy didn’t just start popping up outta nowhere with more aggressiveness in his raps it was build up. He let us know in 2013 on Pound Cake/Paris Morton 2 “Screw all that happy to be here ish yall want me on”. He was being bold saying yall gon respect, when his respect was tested for the first time on a huge level with Meek he responded accordingly. Another thing his image changed, he wasn’t scrawny Degrassi drake. He got muscles and a beard and looked like he was capable of physical damage. So the progressive tough talk was easier to digest.

This went longer than I intended, but all in all I wanted to make my point that someone perception of you can change over time. Various factors must come into play first. It even happened in my own life but that is a story for another day.

Follow me on twitter @OnlyOneJaevonn

Visit gettothecorner.com

#drkae #drake #meek mill #summer sixteen #back to back #life logs #life lessons #cash money records #perception changes #LIFE LESSONS #LIFE LOGS BY JAEVONN HARRIS #JAEVONN HARRIS

[lovenhlboys]

From a Distance (E.Pettersson X Reader)

Chapter 1

Masterlist

Tag list form

A/n: hello peoples!! I’m so excited to FINALLY post the first chapter of this fic!!! I’ve been working on it for a long time, and after a few unpleasant delays, it’s finally happening 😁. While this isn’t my first fic, this is my first NHL fic, and the first fic I’m posting on Tumblr, so I’m a little nervous. This first chapter is mostly the set up to the main story, this is reader’s side of things with a flashback story. Chapter two will be mostly from Elias’s point of view. The rest of the chapters will switch back and fourth between the two.

CREDIT: Finally, before we get started I have to shout out my proofreaders. Y’all put up with me and my insanity: @siriushxney @iateyourdonuts @petey-patty @hufflepuff-girlx @cherrylita @immmbabyyygraceee @💕💕And specifically @imagines-r-s ASH!!! Babes, you have been the best and most supportive friend I could’ve asked for during this. You boosted my confidence about this fic and I have no idea what I’d do without you 😁😁

Without further ado, let’s get started shall we!! (Sorry for the long A/N, it’ll only be for this first chapter)

Paring: Elias Pettersson X Fem!Reader

Warnings: lots of cursing, friends with benefits but like...just cuddling???, references to iCarly, mentions of One Tree Hill.

Genere: enemies-ish —>friends —> lovers

Legend: (i suggest having these ready before you read)

Y/C/N/N= your cute nick name, only Markstrom calls you it (you’ll see why) this can be either a pet name you like, or a nick name you already have.

Y/N/N= your nick name, Brock, Quinn, and a few others call you this, it’s more of a playful name. Again, this can be a nickname you already have (if you don’t have one I suggest something stupid (sounds like something Stech or Brock would come up with)

Y/N= this is your first name, only Elias calls you this unless it’s a serious situation, or you’re in trouble, or Brock is being an ass. (If it wasn’t clear before...your last name is Boeser)

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: you have a hardcore crush on your brothers best friend, who also happens to barely speak to you...it’s a slight predicament.

--------------------------

(This is set in the 2021 season, however, because of my denial, Marky and Stech are still in Vancouver and were never traded... also no Covid. however the season was still delayed just to make it easier to follow.)

Present (Feb. 2021)

You’ve always been best friends with your older brother, you never had any real issues when you were younger and you were inseparable. So much so in fact, that once you graduated early a little less than two years ago (June 2019), he asked you to move to Vancouver and live with him. He was always so protective of you and you appreciated everything he has done in your life. One of the best parts about Brock being your older brother was the people he introduced to you. You aren’t very social and god knows how much of a people person your brother is. Once you had moved in, Brock quickly introduced you to the team. And with your double major in Statistics: Data Sciences and Sports Management, you were able to secure a job with the team. Quickly, you found yourself with a second family, one with many members.

Quinn Hughes is your best friend. when you met him about a year and a half ago, you hit it off immediately. With both of you being the same age and not very social, there was an obvious connection there. When Brock and The boys  go out, it is you and Quinn who stay in and watch shows on the couch (your favorite being New Girl). Huggy Bear is so sweet and you tell him EVERYTHING, even things you’d never tell your brother. You are still thanking the draft lottery every day that the Canucks received the 7th overall pick that gave you your bestie.

Thatcher Demko AKA Dems AKA Thatch AKA baby goalie is the sweetest and most hilarious guy you know. He is always looking after you just like Brock, but he is also one of the most annoying guys you know. When you’d first met you had the biggest crush on him. You told Quinn as much and he gave you so much shit for it. That crush was short-lived though, once you found out how obnoxious he could be. You still love him, just as a friend. Though Quinn never forgets to remind you of the crush that once was.

Bo Horvat is like another big brother to you. Sure you have Brock, but he’s your best friend. Bo, however, is the person you go to when you needed advice. Holly is one of the only WAGs you’ve become close with. She and you consistently have wine and gossip nights, of which Quinn is sometimes in attendance. Plus, you and Quinn are an amazing babysitting team for Gunnar if you have anything to say about it. 

Troy Stecher is the annoying older brother you never had. He always makes fun of you, calls you names, and bullies you in the loving way brothers do. And he never hesitates to come to you if he ever needs girl advice, which seems to happen a lot.

JT was just like Bo, except he is waaay more protective of you, maybe even a bit more than brock. He doesn’t have a sister and when you met, he made it his job to never see you get hurt. Seriously, one day a guy was bugging you at the bar, and both Brock and Bo were struggling to hold him back when he saw him slap you on the ass as you walked away. 

Jacob Markstrom, AKA Marky, AKA Giraffe (pronounced like it is in one of your favorite vines), AKA your cuddle buddy for the past few seasons. Both being single, you felt lonely sometimes and Quinn wasn’t much of a hugger (despite what the nickname might have you believe). Thatcher had offered but Marky, though just as social, is much more laid back. It also helps that he is 6’6 putting him over a foot taller than you. So during movie nights, or late nights at the bar, he is the side you lean on. Of course, you made it abundantly clear to most of the boys and yourselves that you were just friends. As sweet as he was and as great of a boyfriend as he would’ve been, he wasn’t quite your type and your personalities clashed.

Then there was Elias Pettersson, the tall, skinny, Swedish guy you knew as Petey. The guy who looked at you often and barely spoke a word directed towards you. He was Brock's best friend and he came over all the time, you didn’t have an issue with him, and you couldn’t deny he was funny, and from what you’ve heard he is a very kind person. So naturally, he was exactly your type. You’ve had a massive crush on him for a while now, somehow despite the lack of conversation. And the few times he has talked to you, he’s seemed so perfect, but there are only a few times you can remember. 

Right now, as you're on your way to the Canuck’s break room your brother texted you to meet him in, you try to recall those few times, specifically the one where your crush on him truly developed.

--------------------------

FLASHBACK (some time in January, 2020)

--------------------------

You, Quinn, and Jacob were laying on the L-shaped couch in ‘The Boeser apartment’, you were cuddled under the blanket with Jacob, laying on the section perpendicular to the TV, your heads at the corner. Quinn was on the other side of the couch, his head right next to yours. it was about 7 o’clock and the episode of One Tree Hill you were watching had just ended and you three had not eaten dinner yet. As the countdown for the next episode started, your stomach growled and you got a look from Quinn and a giggle from Jacob. 

“You hungry Y/C/N/N?” Jacob asked.

You looked up at him and giggled, “maybe just a little bit.”

“Y/N/N, you know what sounds amazing?” Quinn asked, you could hear the smirk in his voice.

You turned to each other and you both smirked knowing you were thinking the same thing.

“Spaghetti tacos!!” You both said. 

Ever since you were about 10 and you watched iCarly on TV, you had always wanted to try them. It had become an inside joke between you and Quinn for quite some time as he had the same desire as you to see how good they actually were.

“We should totally try them tonight!!” Quinn was quite excited.

“I’m so confused right now,” Jacob chimed in.

“They’re from a show! They take spaghetti and put it in taco shells,” you explained.

“Ahh, hence the name.” he nodded.

“Exactly,” Quinn said.

You jumped up from the couch excitedly and ran straight to your kitchen.

“Ok, we have spaghetti, spaghetti sauce, ground beef, taco shells, aaaand..... by chance do either of you know how to make good meatballs?”

“You’re asking the Swedish guy if he knows how to make meatballs?” Jacob replied.

“Not Swedish meatballs, Italian, stupid Giraffe,” you retorted. 

“Gross,” he said with a disgusted look.

“Ooo my mom made the best Italian meatballs, let me call her to see if she can send me the recipe!” Quinn said with a big smile.

Quinn exited the kitchen and ran to your room to call his mom. 

“You know, I’ve never seen him so excited about anything,” Marky said with a laugh. 

“Quinn loves his food,” you replied.

“Are Brock and Thatch having dinner with us ?”

“I’ll ask.”

You started boiling the water for the pasta, and you cooked part of the ground beef for the meat sauce. Then you texted Brock:

Y/N/N: hey, you want me to make you dinner

Brock: Yeah, who all is there?

Y/N/N: the usual

Brock: Huggy and Marky?

Y/N/N: yep, so do you want some?

Brock: Yeah, and make enough for another person too

Y/N/N: ok

You figured it was Dems since that’s who he went to hang out with when he left 5 hours ago. 

You continued to cook when Quinn came in and grabbed a bunch of stuff from the pantry and cabinets. “Did your mom tell you how to make them?” you questioned your frantic best friend.

“Yes she did and she sent me the recipe too.”

“Coolio,” you reply.

------------------------

You were almost done cooking, the pasta was done, Quinn had put his meatballs in the oven and there were only 5 minutes left on the timer. And the sauce had about 2 minutes to simmer.

“Oh my gosh, I forgot what to do when they're almost done, she does this thing, I have to call her,” Quinn said with a panicked look on his face. He ran back to your room.

The front door to your apartment opened quickly, both boys laughing, “ahh, shit,  my brother’s calling me,” Brock said as he ran back to his room.

“Why does everyone feel the need to exit the room for phone calls?” you asked Jacob.

He shrugged with a giggle, “I don't know, maybe they don’t trust us,” he said in a sarcastically dramatic tone grasping his chest.

The door closed slowly and you glanced at the doorway where you thought you’d see the ever adorable goalie, Thatcher Demko, instead, you saw the adorable, slender, tall blonde you’d seen all the time, but never had a one on one interaction with... except the first time you met, when he told you that you looked pretty.

“Hi, Petey!” Jacob said as he slipped behind you to watch you mix the sauce, he stood over you looking at the sauce and put his hand on your waist.

“Hi,” he replied, his smile from before had faded.

“Looks so good Y/C/N/N,” Jacob said with a kiss on your cheek, a regular action. 

“Thanks, Giraffe, can you grab the taco shells?”

He grabbed them easily from the top shelf (tall ass bitch -_-), and moved behind you, placing his hands on your waist yet again, to move you to the side. “I've gotta run to the bathroom, but I’ll be right back”

“Ok, you have fun with that,” you said with a wink.

Suddenly, was only you and Elias in the room, and the silence was deafening.

“So what are we eating?” he said, pulling your attention to his bright blue eyes.

“Um, spaghetti tacos, they're from a tv sho-”

“Like from iCarly?” he interrupted.

“...Uh yeah? How'd you know?” you couldnt pull your attention away from his eyes, ‘they are just so beautiful,’ you thought somehow you hadnt noticed this within the on and a half years you’d known him.

“We also get Nickelodeon, you know,” he said while throwing you a smirk that made your stomach flip. 

“Oh, I didn't know that,” you replied, feeling just a little embarrassed. 

“iCarly was my favorite, actually.” 

“Yeah, it was mine too,” you said, smiling back, looking at the way he just lit up your kitchen with his presence.

You both stood there for a second just looking at the other, “So how long have-,” he started.

“OKAY,” Quinn unknowingly interrupted, “so she told me what to do, turns out I have to put sauce over them for the last 2 minutes, so Y/N/N can you just put a tablespoon of sauce on each ball then put them back in for two minutes?” 

“Yeah of course. Elias, you were saying?” you looked back at the Swede.

“Oh it's nothing,” he looked down at his shoes. 

“Ok, Y/N/N you need to call mom and tell her we’re fine and that she doesn't need to worry about us please, Paul says she’s stressing,” Brock said as he entered the room.

“When is she not stressing about us? I’ll call her after dinner, how's dad?”

“Doin’ good, nothing has changed or progressed or whatever since we were home last,” Brock moved and sat on the couch letting out a big sigh.

“That’s good,” you let out a sigh.

“Petey, come here, we’re watching Gossip Girl” Brock shouted at the Swede.

“Ooo what episode are you guys on?” you asked. Brock had mentioned how he was making him watch the show you two had watched about 5 times together. 

“Just after Chuck gets Dan kidnapped at Yale.” 

“Oh so you still hate Chuck?” you asked Elias.

“Ew, yeah...wait is that gonna change?” Petey said with a scoff.

“Uh....,” you stalled.

“Y/N shut up, don't spoil it,” Brock interrupted before you could make it worse.

“Ok well, dinner is ready so just start the show after and we can all watch it together.”

--------------------------

“Oh my god, these are actually amazing,” Quinn said with his mouth full.

“I know, I did not think this was gonna taste good,” Jacob added.

“Hey!” you said, offended.

“Y/C/N/N, you know I love your cooking, it was the idea of the meal that I doubted,” Jacob said leaning into your side and putting his arm around your shoulder.

“Mmmhmm, suuure,” you said, rolling your eyes.

“Hallå Marky, ni två är söta (hey Marky, you two are cute),” Petey said, confusing you, Quinn and Brock with the sudden change in language.

Jacob, being oblivious to what Petey was implying, just said, “tack broder (thanks, bro).”

Little did you know what was going on in Elias’s head.

--------------------------

PRESENT

--------------------------

Before that night, you never really thought of Elias in a romantic way. You'd been around him quite a lot, seeing as how, seemingly, is in your apartment more than his own. Sure, you knew he was cute and very sweet from what you'd seen, but up until that point, you'd never had a one-on-one interaction with him. That interaction, however small, was the beginning of an obsessive crush. Quinn was the first to point it out, you started listening closely any time he talked, attempting to converse with him, and thinking about him on a daily basis even when you didn't see him. And due to your stubbornness, no matter how unrequited your crush seemed, it never faltered. You had always thought he hated you, or maybe he just tolerated you because you were Brock’s sister, and you were always around. 

However, that couldn't be farther from the truth.

--------------------------

Tag list: @calgarycanuck @suffering-canucks-fan

#from a distance: series #pls let me know what you think!! #hockey #nhl #elias pettersson #vancover canucks #elias pettersson fic #brock boeser #elias pettersson x reader #elias pettersson imagines #elias pettersson imagine #vancouver canucks imagines #vancouver canucks fic #hockey fic #nhl fic #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #hockey imagine #hockey imagines