#sorry 24 hours first date i can’t do sickly sweet and cuteness right now i need to torture myself and eddie | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hitchell-mope · 5 years

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First film. After the date. Ben’s room. He’s dancing about in a thick towel robe drying his hair. Radios on full blast. Ben’s singing along to bohemian rhapsody loudly. He isn’t noticing Doug standing the doorway looking thoroughly unimpressed

Ben: 🎶I’m just a small boy from a small family save me my life from this monstrosi🎶 AAAAAAAAAAH. Didn’t see you there. Hey.

Doug: I take it the date went well. (He passes Ben’s fish tank) hey goldenrod

Ben: ooh. Can you feed him please. I missed the last one and I don’t want him to die. He’s lasted ten years

Doug (under his breath): that’s because Mrs Potts keeps switching out the dead ones with new one every month

Ben: hm?

Doug: nothing. So how did your date go

Ben: it was amazing

Jay and Carlos’s room. Mal’s still soaked to the bone and her hairs dripping onto the carpet but she’s positively giddy

Mal: I almost died but I didn’t

Evie: why do you incessantly get my hopes up like that?

Carlos: I’m sorry you what

Jay (overprotective mode): I’m gonna kill him

Mal: no wait no no. No. I nearly drowned trying to save him because I thought he drowned.

Back in Ben’s room

Ben: she was trying to save me.

Doug: really?

Jay and Carlos’s room

Mal: yes really. I tried to save him.

Jay: but you can’t swim

Mal: I know

Ben’s room

Ben: the point is she tried to save me even though she couldn’t swim.

Jaylos’s room

Mal: I. I tried being a hero. And it felt good helping someone other then Carlos. Oh also

The kings room

Ben: there’s a chance I came out to her

Doug: how big a chance?

Ben: 100%

Doug: and

Jaylos’s room

Jay: you have a crush on Jane?

Mal: yeah I mean who wouldn’t.

Kings room

Doug: that’s good. But I still think

Ben: I know. I know. But you know how they’d take it. (He starts taking off his robe). Dad would start rabbiting on about propriety and how I have to make a respectable marriage to a princess “lest the sins of the male flesh overcome me” Cogsworth’s words not his. And mom. Oh god that prospect is even worse somehow. I do not want to have the talk with her. Lumiere covered that with me when I was 14.

Doug: I know. I was there

Ben (to Doug) and Mal (to Jay): sometimes I feel like you’re the only one I can talk to about these things

Doug and jay: I’m always gonna be here. I promise

Ben and Mal: thank you.

Ben (snapping out of his self worry): but enough about me. What can I do you for

Jaylos’s room. Evie’s in a bright mint green sixties style dress.

Evie: how do I look

Mal, Jay and Carlos: with your eyes E

Evie: oh ha ha. Seriously though. Do I look contrite and apologetic

Carlos: why?

Evie: because I’m going to find Doug and apologise for not believing him about chad

Jay: if I were you I’d take protective headgear

Carlos: he’s not gonna hurt her. Do you see way he looks at her?

Mal: I’d hit her

Evie: because your a vindictive cruel bitch that’s wearing Ben’s shir...why are you wearing Ben’s shirt?

Mal: relax “mom” it’s a duplicate.

Jay (with a gleam): and?

Carlos: hey Mal. Do I wanna hear what you have to say next?

Mal: probably not.

Carlos: its time for his highnesses walk anyway. Cmon sweetie

(He carries Dude our if the room)

Jay: I don’t think that dogs feet have touched the floor since it started living here

Mal: I know. It’s endearing but at the same time a little creepy.

Evie: awww look at it this way Mal. You have a grandson now and jay has a stepson

Mal: I swear to you. I WILL start complimenting chad.

Evie (getting a deer-in-the-headlights expression): ok I’ll shut up.

Jay: we’re on the details I care about now. Evie get the ice cream. We have a long night ahead of us.

Ben’s room. He’s just noticed Doug’s looking very intently at the ceiling. It’s only then he realises he’s only in underwear and socks

Ben: SHIT. SORRY. I forgot. Sorry.

Doug (still looking at the ceiling): don’t worry. I’m just admiring the dragon nightlight stickers. Do they still work?

Ben (putting a pair of slacks on): I think one still does. It’s nice and eerie and it AHHHH

There’s a crash and a squelch. Doug looks down to see Ben tripped on the pants leg and fell to the ground

Doug: Oh shit. (He helps Ben up) you ok?

Ben: yep nothing wounded. Oh man

Doug: what

Ben: I must have landed on the breakfast burrito I forgot to eat this morning. Ooh it’s still warm.

Doug (slightly sickened): uhhhh

(Ben looks at him innocently)

Ben: yes?

Doug: nothing. Um the reason I came here was because your ex is in my room with the wannabe Casanova

Ben (not knowing that chad essentially ghosted her): aw. Poor Evie.

Doug: well you know he’s a bastard and please get out of those damn pants.

Ben (looking like a sad puppy): hm

Doug: I have this thing. I I have this thing. I am, retentive. I like things to be clean. You are my best friend in fact you are probably the only guy in the school I don’t have a burning hatred for. You are. You’re my best friend. And yeah. You outrank me but I cannot, and I mean I PHYSICALLY cannot have a conversation with you when you have an almost 24 hour old still warm uneaten breakfast burrito stuck to yoUR LEFT ASS CHEEK.

(Ben looks like he’s about to cry but then he bursts into laughter)

Ben: sorry. I forgot

Doug: stop apologising. I. I shouldn’t have yelled. Your the prince. I’m not. You have the authority in this room

Ben: but you’re gonna be my advisor. It’ll be your job to slap me when I’m being an asshole.

Doug: I. I can’t bring myself to slap you

Jaylos’s room

Evie: don’t be crude jay

Jay: that wasn’t crude you wanna hear crude? Then alright. Mal if he looks like what I imagine he looks like under those suits then you need to get out there and d

Evie: develop! An honest emotional connection with him

Mal: yeah jay. You’re my best friend. I respect you. I admire you. But right here, right now. I think I should listen to her.

Evie: HA!

Mal: that said I think you’re wrong E.

Evie: heh?!?!?!?!

Ben’s room

Doug: the love rat and Audrey are gonna be there the entire night. Can I stay here. Please?

Ben: of course (He starts putting in emerald green slacks and a thin mottled purple and black cashmere sweater) as long as you need. I can take the floor

Doug: you realise there’s been a camp bed in your closet since we were ten?

Ben: ok then I can take the camp bed

Jay’s room

Evie: how the hell am I wrong this time

Mal: if Doug actually cares about you then you could rock up in a dress made out of jay’s month old gym socks and he’d forgive you. If he doesn’t. Then. He ain’t worth it.

Evie: ok

(She leaves for Doug’s room)

Doug (helping Ben set up the camp bed) and Mal: I have a confession to make

Jay (who’s digging into a pint of rum and raisin Haagen Dazs) and Ben: yeah

Doug: I may have set you up

Mal: I think Doug set us up

Ben and jay: what.

Doug: Don’t get me wrong. Mal’s awesome and I’m glad you’re happy

Jay’s room

Mal: I’m a villain. Who he knows was sent here to bring down the kingdom

Ben’s room

Doug: I wanted to make sure that Mal was t trying to use you just to get the wand. So I suggested the enchanted lake. If you swam and came back happy. She’s genuine. If you swam and cane back pissed.

Jay’s room

Mal: We’d be sent back to the island

Ben and Jay: Oh

(They both start laughing. Ben drops his side of the camp bed on Doug’s foot)

Jay’s room

Jay: oh ho ho. I like that guy.

Mal: why are you laughing?

Jay: cause it’s what I would do. It’s what Evie would do. It’s what Carlos would do. It’s what you would do. It’s shrewd manipulative underhanded villain thinking

Ben’s room

Doug (feeling the weight of the bed on his foot. High strained voice): so your not mad?

Ben (still laughing): no. You did it to protect me. (He stops laughing and puts his weight on the bed. Still warm and friendly) please don’t do it again though. If you do this again I’m sorry but you won’t be allowed in my room and chad will be my advisor

Doug (in more then a little pain now): I completely understand.

Ben (immmediatly picking up his end of the bed): let me get some ice for that foot

Doug (relieved): thank you.

They set the bed down and Ben goes to his mini fridge

Ben: hey um. Did you by any chance see the uhh

Doug: floor to ceiling autographed poster you have admiral Hawkins?

Ben: yeah?

Doug: would me saying that I did make me be kicked out of here?

Ben: why would it. Then you’d be telling the truth. If you said no and you had seen it then you’d be lying.

Doug: then yes I saw it. It’s pretty hard not to. Personally I think it’s cute you still admire him.

Ben (both relieved and slightly embarrassed): I’ll be getting that ice now

Doug: thank you

Outside Doug and chads room. Evie, still wearing the mint green dress, knocks excitedly not the door. Audrey answers it in a lurid pastel pink summer dress.

Audrey: yes?

Evie: where’s Doug?

Audrey: hmmmm. Don’t know. Don’t care. Now please leave. I’m on a date with my new boyfriend. Seeing as that thing you share a room with stole Ben from me

Evie: hey! Mal may be a bitch but she is not a “that”. And she is far. FAR. More powerful then you. Or have you forgotten what her mother did to yours?

Audrey (rightfully worried): she wouldn’t do anything to me. Ben would never forgive her.

Evie: true. True. But. Jay and I have no such obligation to Ben. And combined. We could bring this whole school down if you mess with any of us. Understood?

Audrey: yes.

Evie: yes what? Cmon. You know the word. P p p prin...?

Audrey: princess?

Evie: go on. Almost there (sickly sweet smile)

Audrey: princess Evie?

Evie: that’s a good mortal.

Audrey: why do you stick up for her. You hate each other

Evie: because she bitchy mean vindictive and dismissive of everything I take a interest in. And she’s the closest thing I have to a sister. She’s family. And she’s allowed to be all that after what I did to her

Audrey: what did you do?

Evie (smiling): none of your concern. But I will tell you how I curried their favour. I stabbed a maniac in the leg to save Carlos three years ago. Now jay won’t let me get hurt and Mal has no choice but to let me be lest she makes Carlos upset. I’m veritably untouchable. Especially against the likes of you

Chad (arriving with two full plastic bottles): they didn’t have grape so I got limeade-oh um move your in my way

(Evie takes a bottle from him whaps him around the head with it then pours their entire contents on him)

Evie: I’m case you’ve forgotten. My name is Evie.

She stalks off in search of Doug

#disney descendants #ben florian #doug son of dopey #mal bertha #bal #evie grimhilde #devie #carlos de vil #jay son of jafar #zendaya!mal #a small bit of #jaylos #audrey daughter of sleeping beauty #chaudrey

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