#since I feel like I’m gonna break more hearts without me knowing and UUUUGH

[if-found-return-to-gusu]

Burying Baby Pt 3

Uuuugh. Okay.

So I threw my mouse. 

Well

It’s Jiang Cheng’s mouse. 

That I stole

Fortunately it didn’t break so I don’t have to buy him a new one. But I DID have to go across the room to go fetch it and for a HORRIBLE second I thought I’d deleted this whole post and I was gonna have to start OVER. (Saved it now so I can type on without worry). 

So we got out of the bathroom and found Lan Xichen again. He came up to Lan Zhan to hug him. It looked a bit stiff if I’m honest, but still. Lan Zhan deserves all the hugs from the people who love him.

But then

Lan Xichen let him go and hugged ME?????????

I mean it was nice but like ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

(Also… just kind realizing that.. Other than Lan Zhan, when was the last time I got a hug? The last time I saw Shijie? I know Jiang Cheng does hug me sometimes but those are rare…. And Uncle Jiang and Madam Yu? Well that’s a laughable thought. Maybe that’s why I’m so clingy? I’m so sorry world that has to deal with me. I’ll try to keep my hands to myself more. )

But yeah he hugged me and told me that he was glad that his baby brother had me in his life. 

A;lkdfj;akdljff

I don’t know if my face or Lan Zhan’s ears were more red but I’m pretty sure if I blushed any harder my face would just pop. 

After that we started making our way out to go back to the cafe. Had to check on the Banjo Bunch and found them all to be quite healthy (what a relief!!). 

I walked Lan Zhan to the door that lead to his apartment (It’s kinda an apartment in that it’s the rooms above the shop, but he doesn’t live in like communal apartments like me. It’s like one building with the shop below and his home above. Does that make sense? It’s probably normal to most people but I always found that so cool! And convenient! <3 

Well anyway I walked him to the door and was gonna head home once I saw him in but… well he asked me to stay the night. Intentionally this time!

He took my hand and kinda… asked the sidewalk. He told me he didn’t want to be alone.

Even if I wasn’t already going to say yes the moment he asked how could i have said no to that?

But we went up together and he ordered some food. We stayed close to each other like it was the most natural thing in the world to do. We would touch each other a lot, but it wasn’t like we were bumping into each other or anything. It was like… like a gentle caress. 

It may have been accidental on his part I suppose but I relished every bit of contact. 

It started to get pretty late after a while so Lan Zhan lent me some (fucking adorable) pajamas to sleep in and gave me another hug before we went our separate ways. 

I couldn’t sleep though. There’s really just something about feeling so close and so far from Lan Zhan that makes it so my mind just won’t settle down. 

I was thinking about what happened that day and I started dwelling on things again. I don’t know. I started wondering if Lan Zhan would have preferred me to not have come. I know everything he said and did said otherwise but I just couldn’t help but think maybe he regretted texting me about the bunnies. 

What is it about the dark and quiet that makes shitty thoughts wander through your brain?

That all being said I actually didn’t dwell for too long because all of a sudden there was this gentle knock on the door. Lan Zhan was there looking so nervous and rumpled. I just.. Oh I wish I could take pictures with my brain. 

But he wanted to sleep with me. Uh.. that is sleep in the same bed not have sex. Haha..ha… ha…

-cough-

Anyway I just threw back the covers and made room for him. Like I was gonna say no???? After dreaming about just that for so long? 

I remember holding him close and letting him use me as a pillow and just.. I don’t think I’ve ever fallen asleep so quickly?  I thought my heart would have been beating too loud to sleep, but I had no trouble at all. (It’s making up for the lack of overzealous beating now though)

Can I sleep like that every night forever? Please? Big spoon/little spoon I don’t care. Just… I want to hold on to Lan Zhan forever. I think that was the best sleep I’d ever had. 

The next day I had to leave earlier than I wanted (Which I guess is redundant because any time leaving is sooner than I want to go) to go to my other job. It’s really getting harder every time to get myself to show up to that job. I really should just quit. Ugh. Maybe next week. 

But Lan Zhan made me my favorite coffee and gave me some pastries! I joked with him saying that if this is what I got every time I left his apartment in the morning he should just give me the keys.  BUT THEN THAT LITTLE-- HE AGREED???? Ugh. If you told me months ago that this man knew how to joke like this I may have called you a liar. Am I a bad influence on him or was he always like this and just too shy to show it before??????

Ugh Well I laughed it off and told him I had to go. Double shifts are the work of the devil.  (Not Lan Xichen. A different devil. One that’s actually evil. A Double Devil?)

Uh.. well that’s as good a point as any to end this part. I’ll follow up with another update though because that is NOT all that has happened since I last posted.

I still have so much to saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

#(Modern AU!) #long post

[name-me-regret]

The Hoodie Borrower - Chapter 8

Summary:

Tony wasn’t going to get involved with the kid. He’d made a mistake bringing him to Germany. Then he started to realize that he needed to keep this dumbass kid alive. Yeah, that’s all it was.

Author Note: So, I got super blocked and I kept going back to methods of trying to get past it but it didn’t work for a long time. Yeah... so, sorry this is so late. Didn’t mean for it to happen. Thanks to Diana for her spamming and encouragement. You helped me, girl.

Read it on AO3.

- - - - 

 “When the night has come    And the land is dark    And the moon is the only light we'll see    No I won't be afraid, no I won't be afraid    Just as long as you stand, stand by me         And darlin', darlin', stand by me    Oh, stand by me    Woah, stand now    Stand by me, stand by me    Whenever you're in trouble won't you stand by me    Oh, stand by me    Woah, just stand now    Oh, stand, stand by me...“

~Stand By Me - Ben E. King   - - - -   Peter grinned as he read the text message that Miles had sent him, always thinking his friend was super funny. He’d just scored a DVD player from the dumpster a few blocks from school as he headed for the subway to get home. Even if it didn’t work, Peter was pretty confident that he could get it working once again.   Miles to go for road work: So... wanna hang out this weekend? I found this awesome cafe last time. Wanna get some food or something?   Peter bee Parker: Yeah sure, that’d be great. MJ likes cafes and stuff, and Ned is always down. Let me ask them if they’re free   Miles to go for road work: Oh, yeah sure. Lemme know.   All the way in Brooklyn, a teenage boy let his head drop onto the pillow with a groan. “Damnit,” he mumbled.   Ganke laughed from his seat at his computer. “Again?” Another groan was Ganke’s answer. “Parker is totally oblivious, man. You gotta ask him straight... well, maybe straight isn’t the right word for it.”   “Fuck off,” Miles grumbled.   “Anyways, what I’m more concerned about are these... new abilities of yours. What’re you planing on doing with them? Gonna become like that crazy dude on YouTube?”   Miles turned on his back and looked at his hand, flinching as electricity crackled along it. “I dunno,” he muttered, flexing his hand and tried to do it again only for nothing to happen. “I think I gotta figure them out first before I decide to do anything.”   Ganke hummed in agreement as he continued to type on his laptop.   - - - -   “Hey May.”   “How was school today?” she asked as he tossed his bag aside and put the DVD player he’d found in the trash on the table.   “It was ok,” he said with a bit of a shrug. “There’s this crazy car parked outside...” He turned to face her and froze when he saw Tony freaking Stark sitting in his living room.   “Oh, Mr. Parker,” the man said with a smirk.   - - - -   Chaos Squad   Peter bee Parker: Sorry guys can’t make it to the cafe! I’ll explain when I get back   Miles to go for road work well go when you get back   Michelle aka the boss has changed the group chat to Nerd Squad   Ned your boi: Type F to pay respects to Peter ‘ditches’ Parker   Miles to go for road work: F   Michelle aka the boss: F   Peter bee Parker: :((   - - - -   Peter groaned as he lay on the concrete of the airport terminal, not wanting to get up but he forced himself when he heard what might have been machine gunfire. He sat up, clutching his bruised ribs and lifted his face. The fourteen year old was horrified as he saw what appeared to be War Machine falling out of the sky, judging by the colors of the armor.   He staggered to his feet, stepping forward as if he would help him, but he didn’t have super speed and would never make it in time. Peter heard Mr. Stark’s desperate cry of the Colonel’s name moments before he plowed at high speeds into the unforgiving ground. Peter shut off the comm with a shaking hand, the other one still holding it against his abdomen.   “Kid,” he heard, turning to see Happy signaling Peter to follow him. He glanced toward the direction he had seen War Machine fall, before he turned and hurried away.   - - - -

Tony went against the doctor’s orders when they told him he needed complete bed rest. He knew he should be resting, because he was in such pain due to his cracked sternum from getting a vibranium shield slammed into his arch reactor in his chest. It had been like after Afghanistan all over again, and it was hard to take deep breaths without feeling pain, and if he coughed or laughed it was agony.   However, he had to see the kid home. He knew that Happy could have easily taken him home, since he’d picked him up four days ago. Tony had to meet with Rhodey and coordinate their plan or attack. It had been such a difficult thing to think about, attacking whom had once been their friends.   And he had almost let Happy take him, because of the pain. Then the image of being knocked out of the air by that giant hand had invaded his brain, Rhodey falling with frightening speed toward the ground. So, he had gotten his battered and bruised body up. As he dressed with difficulty, Tony realized that he never should have taken him into this fight. He was fourteen years old for crying out loud. Luckily, he was more resilient than he gave him credit for, but the imagine of the kid laying on the tarmac looking broken wouldn’t leave his head.   Tony picked up the kid from his hotel room and driven them to the airport. And even if he had been on it before, Peter was still so amazed by the plane and the seats and being in the air for the second time in his short life (fourteen!), and his guileless attitude eased some of the hurt (Don’t think of it).   Then he had fallen asleep, proving he was more tired (or hurt) than he was letting on. That was after eating three servings of the meals on board. Tony was looking through the newspaper Happy had shoved in his hand and was amused as he remembered how much the man had bitched about it.   He must have dozed off as well, since he was also still injured and exhausted (more emotionally than physically). Tony hadn’t even woken up when Happy had lowered his seat to a more comfortable position. It was as they cleared USA airspace that he was woken up, by several dozen beeps. He jerked out of his slumber and into a defensive position, feeling agony shoot through his chest.   The man bit his lip to stop the cry that wanted to claw up his throat, seeing black spots from the pain. His heart was beating wildly in his chest and Roger’s voice (which he’d come to despise) in his ear ’He’s my friend.’ ‘So was I.’ The shield, which had been made by his father and that had once stood for justice, coming down as if for a death blow as he helplessly-   “Oh, mood,” a young voice giggled. Tony’s eyes shifted to the right and came to alight on one Peter Parker, a smile on his face still plump with baby fat. He was looking through his phone and Tony realized all at once that the beeping had been coming from his shitty iPhone. They must have gotten within satellite range of whatever phone company May Parker had.   It took him another moment to realize he was staring, and that’s likely why the teen was giving him a questioning look. Tony cleared his throat before he spoke. “You’re certainly popular, or is it a clingy girlfriend?” he teased, hoping his voice didn’t sound forced. He was certainly forcing himself.   Tony was amused at the look on kid’s face, seeing the flush crawling up his cheeks. “I don’t have a girlfriend,” he muttered petulantly as he hunched his shoulders.   “A cling boyfriend then? I don’t judge. Free love and all that.” Peter’s face was pretty red by then and Tony felt like giggling. He was so easy to fluster, and it was a refreshing change. Peter wasn't like Steve at all, who would have shaken his head and ignored Tony.   Well, he supposed that he still wasn't use to Tony's antics, and gave it a month until he was sick of Tony. It was bound to happen.   "No, Mr. Stark. It's just my friends Ned and Miles. They're roasting me on Discord," he said with an eyeroll but a  smile on his face. It was a fond kind of smile that Tony hadn't worn since the days before the Avengers had become a thing. When it had just been Rhodey and him, and Pepper and Tony had just started what wasn't yet a doomed relationship.   "Oh, is that so? And what are they "roasting" you about?" he inquired, lifting his hands to do air quotes.   Peter giggled. "I can't  believe you did the air quotes. That's such a dad thing to do." He was distracted by another ding on his phone that he missed the stunned look on Tony's face.

No one had ever said he was paternal, in any way, and here was this fourteen year old having just crushed all that with one word. Granted, he hadn't  actually called him dad, but he had said he had done something a father would do (or did).   And even if it wasn't a big deal, since Peter had gone back to laughing at his phone, it was huge to Tony. He had no fatherly qualities and had no plans on becoming a dad, since his own father hadn't been... the best dad. So, he knew he would never make a good one.   As they dropped off the kid off in front of his apartment building, where he had laughed for the first time since before the Siberia incident, he knew he had to put some distance between Peter and him. He'd planned on taking the superhero teenager under his wing and teaching him the ropes, and perhaps he would be better than he had been; wouldn't make the same mistakes he'd once done. Now, however, after that one word, Tony couldn’t take the kid on as a mentee, it just wasn’t possible. He had to break away now, while he still had a chance.   Besides, he'd be fine. How much trouble could a super-kid get into stopping purse snatchers?   - - - -   When he had to save the disaster super-kid from drowning after getting tangled in his own parachute, he knew he couldn’t leave him alone anymore. Now, he had a new job, whether he wanted it or not. That new job was to keep one dumbass super kid from killing themselves.   - - - -   "Uuuugh," Miles groaned as he landed heavily on the concrete, spitting up a bit of blood which got on the mask he was wearing. He'd gotten the idea to use a Mexican wrestler's mask to hide his identity for now, since using a ski mask would make him look like a burglar.   Ganke rushed to his side as soon as he climbed the five flights of steps of the apartment building, breathing heavily. "H-holy... shit, Miles?" he gasped. coughing a bit. "Is... anything broken?"   He pulled up the mask, spat the blood in his mouth and lifted a thumbs up. Then fell back against the pavement, another pained groan escaping his mouth.   "Rip," his traitorous friend laughed at him, reaching out to help him off the ground. "Come on, enough with trying to kill yourself. Don't you have a date today?"   Miles elbowed him with a scowl. "It's not a date."   Ganke just laughed as he clutched his stomach. "Crashed and burned again," he cackled.   Miles only grumbled but didn't deny it.   "Is he still gushing over that Liz girl?"   When his friend's shoulders slumped as he sighed, Ganke only patted his shoulder sympathetically. It was one thing to try and ask Peter out and fail, but another to see him crushing after some girl from his school. Miles was hoping it was more that he was oblivious than him being straight. Because if he was straight, than he was screwed.

“This sucks,” he grumbled, Ganke nodding solemnly, even if Miles knew he was an asshole that enjoyed his pain. He didn’t know why he was friends with him.

“Come on, let’s grab some burgers. My treat,” he told him.

Oh yeah, cause he was awesome and bought him food constantly since his metabolism had skyrocketed like crazy.

“Then we can work out why you suck at asking out one guy to a single date.”

Also, cause they were roommates and it was too late in the year to change rooms.   - - - -   Peter jumped as his phone rang, fumbling with it for a moment and it was only his sticky powers that kept it from falling to the pavement down below. "Hello?" he asked uncertainly, recognizing the number but not sure if it was really Mr. Stark.

“Hey, kid, do you want to come over to work in the lab Friday after school?”

The fifteen year old was sure he was dreaming, so he used his free hand to pinch his right arm. It hurt. So, meant he wasn’t dreaming. “S-sure!” he sputtered before he could change his mind.

“Great. Happy will pick you up after school. I’ll call Aunt Hottie and let her know.”

He hung up before he could ask him how he had his aunt’s phone number, but he should have known better. He’d found him when he had thought he was being super careful on keeping his secret identity a.. well, a secret.

- - - -   Peter grinned as he put the finishing touches on his new web shooters. “I did it! I can’t believe I was able to make this all on my own-“

The canister exploded, covering him in webbing as he was flung back. He’d clenched his eyes and mouth closed, his senses screaming at him in time that he was able to spare them from being filled with the sticky webbing. When he opened them and glanced around, he realized he was stuck to the wall, arms and legs spread-eagle. Well, at least he could see, even if opening his eyes had been hard, but breathing was proving to be a bit difficult.

As he wondered how he was going to get out of this, the door opened with a swish and it was only cause he was already facing them that he saw them, since he was barely able to turn his head. Tony and a blonde haired teenage boy he didn’t recognize were standing there. He was super embarrassed, and also, he couldn’t breathe.

FRIDAY must have alerted Tony of this (he also couldn’t hear too well), because the man hurried over, grabbing a screwdriver on his desk to cut away the webbing covering his face. Now that he was closer he could kind of hear him. “Jesus, kid,” he grunted as he freed his nose and mouth, and Peter took in a gasping breath. “Is that better? Breathing okay?”

“Yeah,” he croaked. Peter tried to pull away from the wall, but realized he’d have to use his super strength to accomplish this, and he didn’t want to let this other boy know and possibly oust himself as Spider-Man. By then the other had reached Tony’s side, whom was taller than the man.

“Isn’t there like something to dissolve it?” he asked, eyebrows raised questionably. His dark blue eyes were almost like the deep waters of the ocean.

Peter shook his head when he realized he’d actually been seeing black spots. “Y-yeah, I think it’s in a jar in that drawer behind you.” The kid went to do that while Tony continued to cut away the webbing covering his face. His hands were shaking.

“Don’t scare me like that, Peter. I have a heart condition.”

The use of his name showed how shaken he’d been, and it was a scary thing. He’d been thrown against the wall, and that had punched out the air from his lungs. The webbing had been so thick that he couldn’t get any air in. So, Peter would have been in trouble if Tony and this other kid hadn’t come when they had.

By that time he’d managed to uncover his entire head and face, and the other had returned so he couldn’t say anything to his words. “Is this it?”

Peter had put it in a small spray can for easier administration, so it was easy for Tony to take it and spray it about three times and get him down. “The rest can dissolve in water.”

“You’ll have ta get in clothes an’ all,” the other teen said, and Peter now noticed his southern accent. It sounded nice, a real change from the usual New York accent, and Miles’s Brooklyn accent. He was wearing a black denim Harley Davidson jacket of some kind with a black hoodie under that, and some frayed blue jeans with some beat up sneakers.

“Yeah, I guess so,” he grumbled. There wasn’t enough dissolvent to get rid of all the webbing. He went to walk away and looked at him. “Um, nice to meet you. I’m Peter. P-Parker. Peter Parker,” he stuttered, feeling his face warming.

What a terrible first impression. This was almost as bad as the basketball covered in dog poop incident when he’d first met Miles. Peter just hoped this turned out alright in the end as well, and especially with him having a new friend.

“Nice to meet you, Peter Parker. I’m Harley Keener,” he said with a grin. “Hope we can become friends.”

“Sure!” he enthused, his voice breaking and making him flush even more. “I’m gonna,” he motioned toward the door.

As soon as Peter walked off, the blonde boy turned to Tony. “So, that’s the intern you’ve been raving about?”   Tony sighed and nodded. “Yeah, that’s my disaster kid,” he confirmed.

Harley nodded with a hum. “So, you didn’t tell me he was super cute.”

“Excuse me, what?”

“Since he’s your kid, does that mean I’d be your son-in-law if I started dating him?”

Tony looked at him and then pointed at the door. “Get out of my lab.” Harley cackled and simply ignored him.

- - - -    When Peter came out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist, it was to a pile of clothes folded neatly on his bed. He didn’t have clothes in the room that Tony had dubbed as ‘his’, so they must have been Tony’s clothes. When he saw an old but well maintained MIT grey hoodie, he knew they had to be. It was warm when he pulled it over the slightly baggy shirt and pants.

If he purposefully kept it, well, Tony never asked for it back.-

#Hoodie Borrower #Peter Parker #Miles Morales #Tony Stark #Ganke Lee #Harley Keener #Michelle Jones #Ned Leeds #Fanfiction #bisexual miles morales #oblivious peter parker #The Hoodie Borrower