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makeste · 3 years

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BnHA Chapter 313: Deku VS Lady Nagant

Previously on BnHA: Hawks’s super-hot badass murder senpai Lady Nagant showed up to fire a cupid’s arrow into my heart, and a bunch of literal bullets into my son. Deku was all “oh shit it’s Hawks’s super-hot badass murder senpai, what do I do, let me think back to Hawks’s advice for a sec.” Flashback!Hawks was all “anyway Deku so if my super-hot badass murder senpai ever shows up you’re basically screwed so you’d better abscond the fuck out of there.” Present!Deku was all “lol idek why I flashed back to that conversation since I’m just going to do the exact opposite of what Hawks said” and charged directly toward Nagant because WHY NOT. Overhaul was all “waah I need to get back to my boss who I put in a coma out of love” and Nagant was all “jesus christ why did I even bring you here” and had a flashback to AFO who was all “ILU NAGANT IMMA GIVE YOU AN EXTRA QUIRK SO PLEASE CAPTURE DEKU FOR ME PLEASE AND THANKS” and yeah. Shit is all over the place right now and I love it.

Today on BnHA: All Might gets attacked by a pair of discount assassins and is all “Call an ambulance! ...BUT NOT FOR ME” and it’s really badass but also I really wish he would stop tempting fate like this. Lady Nagant is all “[casually flies around town shooting shit]” and I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t read an entire chapter of just that. Deku is all, “[gets shot (≥_<)]” and releases a giant Smokescreen which prompts En to show up. En is all, “( •᷄⌓•᷅ ) (⌣̀ Δ⌣́) ( •̀_•́ )σ (¬､¬) (눈_눈)” which I consider to be a high point of both the chapter and of my life. The chapter ends with Deku using the Third’s quirk to launch a bunch of random objects at Nagant so that he can jump up and grab her arm all sneaky-like, and I’m sure this is going to prompt another week’s worth of discourse that I don’t care about at all, but fuck it, I’m having a good time.

OH WE’RE CUTTING BACK TO ALL MIGHT WELL THAT’S NICE I GUESS. CONGRATS ON NOT BEING DEAD

you named your car??

you named it Hercules??

I love you so much??

please marry me you giant fucking dork???

lmao speaking of huge fucking dorks

who the fuck are you clowns. la dee da we’re gonna murder All Might with our synchronized spear attack!! I mean... they’re clearly trying their best... maybe I should just be nice and politely hype them up like All Might is so clearly trying to do

like okay, but we all agree that this is actually the least intimidating attack any of us has ever seen, right?? these guys zipped up their hoodies all serious-like and are trying to attack All Might and Hercules with their Walmart tiki torches, but just, no?? right?? like the only way this could possibly be effective is if they were trying to kill All Might with secondhand embarrassment

“those are assassins” this is a VERY generous assessment, All Might

OH MY GOD THE TIKI TORCHES ACTUALLY KILLED THE FUCK OUT OF HERCULES

[slaps roof of car] this baby can fit so many weaponized festive backyard lighting solutions in it

and yet, even after watching this with my own two eyes, I still can’t take these dudes seriously. idek what it is. anyways r.i.p. Hercules, I loved you a lot but I guess you weren’t actually a very good armored car were you

omg they didn’t know it was All Might??

okay 1) for a moment there I was like “oh hey maybe they’re not so bad after all” but then a moment later it was like “ah nope, they are.” like, that was an interesting .06 second emotional journey there. anyways 2) All Might you have my permission to kick their asses for this disrespect, and 3) anyone else all of a sudden getting “wouldn’t this be an interesting time for Stain to suddenly show up” vibes?? no?? just me???

(ETA: hmm tbh I’ve still got those vibes and they haven’t gone away lol. Stain?? you out there buddy?? do you want to be cool for just once in your life. ball’s in your court pal.)

OH SNAP ALL MIGHT ARE YOU REALLY GONNA DO IT ARE YOU GONNA KICK THEIR ASSES

PROTECTIVE DAD MODE ACTIVATED?? BECAUSE YOU KNOW I’M HERE FOR THAT SHIT, SO YEAH, FEEL FREE

omg he’s shouting at them about how much Deku has suffered lmao and they’re just like falling over from being scolded

so they have absolutely no idea what he’s talking about though, right? “SIR THIS IS A WENDY’S” well whatever, you killed his pet car so he’s in a bad mood now

OH MY GOD

LIKE, JUST SO WE’RE ALL CLEAR, THESE FOUR PAGES SO FAR HAVE MADE ALMOST ZERO SENSE. LIKE MAYBE 2% SENSE TOPS. BUT ASK ME IF I CARE. GO AHEAD AND ASK. I SAID GO AHEAD, IT’S OKAY. ...NO I DON’T CARE AT ALL THANK YOU FOR ASKING

(ETA: also, the more I look at this panel, the more I’m just like, why the hell would you phrase it like that though, sob. way to doubly tempt fate?? are you trying to give Horikoshi a challenge??)

and now back to Deku who is randomly bouncing around the city and narrating it to himself just in case he was confused about why he was doing this

who are you talking to Deku. but thanks we appreciate it

man you gotta love that overconfidence. the smartest guy in the world warned you away from this lady, so SURE, LET’S RUN RIGHT UP TO HER. “I APPRECIATE YOUR INPUT, FLASHBACK!HAWKS, BUT I’LL TAKE IT FROM HERE” well okay then!!

I think it would be funny if RHA.com put little Buzzfeed-style polls in between the chapter pages so they could survey people at random intervals as they read their way through the chapter. like, you finish this page and then there’s a little poll there asking “do you think Deku’s plan of catching up to Lady Nagant and finding out where Shigaraki is will work?”, and you click “no” just like everyone else and then nod as the results show that 97% of your fellow readers also picked “no”, and you chuckle to yourself wondering how many of the 3% accidentally clicked on the wrong option by mistake, and then you keep on reading

ANYWAY, SO

HOW’S THAT PLAN WORKING OUT FOR YOU SO FAR DEKU. nice kick, though!!

omggggggg

ouch

update: Deku’s plan not really working out. sources tell me my boy has been fucking shot. this is an ongoing story and we will keep you posted with the latest developments as they come in

wait what

feel free to explain to the rest of us what all of this “UNLESS...” and “THAT POSSIBILITY...” shit means anytime, Deku

oh lol did he realize she could fly??

BREAKING NEWS UPDATE, CNN’s John King reports that Deku is still fucked. eyewitness reports now coming in that Nagant is doing no-look shots and basically not even giving a fuck. sources described her mannerisms and expression as “sexy, but in like an effortless sort of way.” we will continue to bring you the latest

so now there’s basically an entire page of Deku being all “ah fuck so she’s basically closing in and she could already hit me with impossible accuracy even from Far Away, so if that’s the case then her being Up Close is probably going to be even worse!” making good use of that Big Hero Brain there, Deku

so now what, you’re doing some kind of spiraling kick thing?? how is that going to help

oh lol he’s using Smokescreen to create some cover. aww, good for you Deku you named one of your Smokescreen attacks

OH NO LADY DON’T TELL ME AFO DIDN’T EVEN FILL YOU IN ON THE BASICS

seriously, AFO?? you basically told her what Deku’s exact strategy was going to be but then couldn’t be assed to drop that little, small, barely notable piece of knowledge that Deku is rocking multiple quirks?? is it supposed to be a secret or something?? you dropped the ball here man

damn this is getting intense now

(ETA: the way En is poking Deku’s head in that first panel is fucking sending me, I love this guy so much omg.)

well then what are you planning, Deku?? I’m actually really curious!! I am genuinely starting to be invested in this fight scene not only in the “wanting to see who wins and how that impacts the plot” sense, but also in the “wanting to see how it happens because the choreography and strategy is actually pretty cool” sense, which honestly hasn’t happened for quite a while now! this is fun

anyway so what’s up Deku, are you going to use another quirk?? I’ve been speculating that he hasn’t actually unlocked the last two yet (since Two and Three didn’t exactly seem convinced when we last saw them), but maybe I’m about to be proven wrong

(ETA: well he clearly has Three’s obviously, but Two’s is still MIA, and that’s the one I am of course the most curious about. that’s the one we’re all curious about, let’s be real.)

OH SNAP???

AHHHH I’M HYPED LOL. ANOTHER SHINY NEW QUIRK LOL SHOULD I PUT UP THE USUAL DISCOURSE DISCLAIMER

(ETA: so yeah, after thinking on it, I’m not gonna say “please no Deku discourse on my blog” this week, but I probably will ignore any discourse that does come my way though, just because I don’t have much interest in getting involved in what would probably be a pretty repetitive discussion. like, I can just sum up my opinions (which is what they are) here instead. in fact here they are lol:

1) I like the SIXQUIRKS and I like seeing Deku be a badass.

2) I also don’t think Deku is too OP. more like he’s exactly as OP as he needs to be at the moment, given that we’re approaching the end of the series. I expect the other kids will also be pretty damn OP when we see them fight again. we’re just at that point now where they’re all badasses (as well they should be; they’ve grown a lot and they deserve it). it’s just that Deku’s the one we’re getting to see right now.

3) of course I miss Kacchan and the others, but for me this vibes much closer to the MVA arc where even though I missed them, I was still having a blast (as opposed to the dark days of the Basement arc where I was pretty much losing it lol). like, even though Kacchan’s my favorite, I still love Deku a lot and this arc has been amazing for him getting to shine on his own (for like the first time, really).

4) y’all know I love the OFA plot and I’ve never been shy about that lol. I like all of the Vestiges a lot. Banjou and his over the top personality; En and his “guy you thought would be serious and :| all the time but is actually hyper-animated and ALL OVER THE PLACE” energy; Shiro who actually is a :| sort of guy lol; Three who I still expect will be fleshed out in a more detailed flashback at some point; and of course Two, who, well. you know what I think about him lol. Bakuverse is still on the table and I’m still hyped. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that we still have yet to see Two actually talk to Deku (as opposed to talking to the other Vestiges while Deku is distracted). did he lend him his power yet?? or is he still holding out?? either way it’s definitely going to be a Big Thing when it finally happens and I can’t wait to see it.

5) Lady Nagant is Everything and just because Deku grabbed her arm doesn’t mean the fight is over yet lol. Overhaul hasn’t come into play yet either. not to mention that even if the fight is over, the “where do we go from here” part still has me excited either way. her connection to Hawks and the HPSC is very intriguing and we’ve barely touched on that as of yet; she definitely has more of a role to play in this.

6) last but not least, I feel like every week the discussion is all about how much focus Deku’s getting, and how OP he is or isn’t, and OFA this and OFA that, but meanwhile I’m actually so invested in the character development here though?? the way Deku has distanced himself from everyone (except for the Vestiges, because of course they’re already dead so it’s not like they can die again lol)?? the way he’s pushing himself far too hard and we can see the shadows in and under his eyes, and the fact that he never smiles, and even All Might has remarked on how he isn’t taking care of himself at all?? the fact that he’s so single-mindedly obsessed with focused on stopping AFO?? the fact that he’s still the same sweet old Deku despite everything and was so kind to that fox lady with the umbrella, but there was also something so sad about that scene because it felt like a reminder of the type of hero that he wants to be, but that he’s not allowed to be right now?? because the stakes are too high and the world is falling apart?? and he feels like he’s the only one who can do something about it?? and that he has to be?? and that he is putting so much pressure on himself right now, and it’s absolutely too much pressure for any one person to bear, and I feel like no one is fucking talking about this lol goddammit.

anyway so yeah. I have feels about this, and every week that slow-burn angst is getting more and more intense behind the scenes, and I feel like it’s all going to hit a breaking point eventually. sooner rather than later. it really feels like a mirror of Katsuki’s post-Kamino arc. where all that angst was just churning below the surface for like twenty chapters and then it finally was like “okay it’s time” and it all came bursting out and we got the best five chapters of the fucking series (in my admittedly biased estimation lol).

basically, I know that most of fandom is billing this as either the “villain hunt” arc or the “solo Deku SIXQUIRKS fighting arc” or whatever. but for me, it’s always been and still is the Deku Angst arc lol. the cool fights are a sexy bonus (the worldbuilding less so because even though it’s interesting to see society at such a low point, it’s also very depressing and gets old pretty fast), but for me the thing that’s really keeping me engaged chapter after chapter is seeing Deku like we’ve never seen him before. seeing him all quiet and withdrawn and brooding and focused on AFO, AFO, AFO, and seeing that “he just doesn’t take himself into account” mentality taken to extremes. I am invested in that. I’m soaking up that angst each and every week, and I’m invested in seeing what comes of it. it’s a big picture thing. week to week this arc might just seem like a bunch of villain fight scenes, sure. but Deku’s emotional journey is the thread that’s going to carry this arc through from beginning to end, and for that I’m willing to be patient.

anyway that turned into a BIG OL’ RANT there but yeah! so those are my thoughts on the disk horse as it currently stands. and like I said, I’m open to discussion, but tbh I will probably just wind up repeating these same talking points endlessly so just a fair warning lol.)

anyway so Three says Deku has yet to use his quirk at ALL but now he’s trying to combine it with another quirk?? damn. also please check out En’s face here you guys

En launching a sneak attack up my favorite character list by the sheer power of his expressions alone. he really knows how to make the most of his screentime

OH DAMN DEKU

at this point the 3% from that hypothetical poll earlier are starting to feel prettttty damn smug, I’ll bet. well shit

what in the fuck

?? so like releasing his chi or whatnot?? isn’t that basically just like base OFA all over again?? also Deku did you seriously just apologize to Gran’s cape

update: Nagant has turned her eyeball into a gun

hm. hmmmmmmm. ...okay yep, still somehow sexy

anyway so she’s just floating up there building suspense, as one does. lord I sure hope she has good reflexes because something tells me she’s going to need them

OH SNAP HE THREW GRAN’S CAPE AS A DECOY WHAAAAT OKAY THAT’S SOME SMART SHIT DEKU

LOL SHE’S MAD NOW

JESUS CHRIST SHE JUST NEVER TAKES A GODDAMN BREAK FROM BEING AWESOME HUH

DEKU ARE YOU JUST THROWING EVERY DAMN THING IN YOUR INVENTORY

but without the cape and the hood how will you continue to look like an enigmatic badass. you really can’t. which means we might finally be moving on from the wandering nomad part of this arc, stay tuned

LOL YOU MANIAC

I hope he went full Kacchan with the dialogue there. his face sure looks like it lol. popped out of a building all mad fdskljlkj omg

well this was fun, shit. I still have basically no idea what Three’s quirk does though lol. like, can he use it to charge up objects with kinetic energy or something?? but then what was all of that talk about combining it with one of the other quirks?? or was that just because he was using Smokescreen at the same time??

(ETA: having seen and read an additional half-dozen explanations of Three’s quirk, I can say with confidence that I still have basically no idea what it is or does.)

anyway so!! Deku is a badasssssss but something tells me not to count Nagant out just yet even so. also I really enjoy seeing Deku flip out on people like he doesn’t have a fucking hole in his torso because it reminds me of A CERTAIN SOMEONE and I always love to see him channeling that feral energy; I feel like it’s been a while

anyways good luck to you both!! I truly wish that both of you could win. but if not, then maybe you can at least become friends instead. you have so much in common, you both can fly and have multiple quirks and you’re both badasses, and plus it would just be really funny to see the look on Hawks’s face lmao

#bnha 313 #midoriya izuku #lady nagant #bnha meta #deku meta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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junker-town · 3 years

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Western Illinois, Year 33, 2039-2040

The Leathernecks attempt to win national title No. 8 in our College Hoops 2K8 simuation.

Welcome back to our simulated dynasty with the Western Illinois Leathernecks in College Hoops 2K8. You can find a full explanation of this project + spoiler-free links to previous seasons here. Check out the introduction to this series from early April for full context. As a reminder, we simulate every game in this series and only control the recruiting and coaching strategies. Dynasty mode runs for 40 years.

Before we pick up with the Leathernecks at the start of Year 33, here’s a recap of everything that happened last season:

We returned four starters from a Sweet 16 team the year before, and began the new campaign ranked No. 10 in the preseason polls. We lost our first two games of the season to Florida and Indiana, and then won out through the conference tournament. We entered the NCAA tournament at 28-2 on the season.

We were given a No. 6 seed to the big dance. We beat George Washington in the first round, Stanford in the round of 32, Baylor in the Sweet 16, and Houston in the Elite Eight. We then faced No. 1 seed Ole Miss in the Final Four and lost, 90-84.

We recruited for four scholarships and landed four players: PG Arvydas Hardy, SF Reece Mascoll, PF Al Reece, C Felipe Hopes. It was ranked as the No. 5 recruiting class in the country.

Here’s a first look at our roster for Year 33:

When we won our seventh national championship at the end of Year 28, it capped a run of three natties in four years for our Leathernecks. We haven’t cut down the nets since. Last year’s Final Four run had us so close to our goal. While we did lose three players to graduation, the bulk of the lineup that we started during last season’s tournament run returns.

We begin the season No. 13 in the preseason polls. Let’s meet the starters:

Randolph Pompey, redshirt junior, 87 overall: Pompey flew under the radar as a recruit (No. 134 overall, No. 58 point guard), and came in with the worst potential rating (D grade) in program history. Why did we take him? We loved his size at 6’5 PG out of high school, and he’s grown three inches to 6’8 as he enters his redshirt junior year. Pompey is an excellent finisher, a solid three-point shooter (83 rating), and has great awareness on both ends. He’s only average as a ball handler and passer, and grades out as a C+ in quickness. After an excellent game in our Final Four loss to Ole Miss last season (23 points, 10 assists), we think he can take the next step and become a dominant point guard. We’re not going to complain if his low potential rating means the NBA doesn’t want him early. Native of Mesquite, TX.

Scott Doornekamp, redshirt junior, 91 overall: Doorekamp was another three-star recruit who looks poised to completely outplay his ranking. We moved him into the starting lineup for last season’s tournament run and he gave us a consistent scoring punch as a 6’6 wing who can shoot. Doornekamp is our highest-rated three-point shooter (88 rating), and grades out as an A in finishing, a B in dunking, a B in handling, and an A- in passing. He also has A speed and A- quickness. He should be our focal point this year as Dave French’s replacement in the lineup. Native of Erie, PA and projected first round pick.

Spanky Fanning, redshirt senior, 93 overall: Fanning started for us last season before we replaced him in the lineup with Doornekamp for the tournament run. The 6’6 wing has always been a shaky three-point shooter, but has worked to improve to a 75 rating in that area. He has a lot of great ‘glue guy’ style attributes: he grades out as an A- passer and ball handler, an A in on-ball defense, A- in strength and quickness, and solid awareness on both ends. Will he be able to hit enough shots to take us on a long tournament run? Former No. Former No. 92 overall recruit out of Davis, CA.

PF Ernesto Mack, redshirt junior, 88 overall: Mack is a super strong 6’8 power forward who can defend the rim and score inside. He has a 92 rating in shot blocking and a 90 rating in strength as he enters the starting lineup for the first time as a junior. He’s great on the block on either end of the floor, and is only average as a rebounder, but we find his A- passing and ball handling grades to be intriguing. Former No. 108 overall recruit and No. 8 power forward out of Columbus, Ohio.

Vinnie Harmon, redshirt senior, 93 overall: Harmon averaged 19 points per game last year as a first-time starter, and should be poised to take on an even greater offensive load as a senior. His scoring package is basically unstoppable: he grades out as an A- in finishing and midrange shooting, a B+ in three pointing, and an A+ in offensive rebounding. An explosive vertical athlete, Harmon has an ultra aggressive offensive mentality, kills it on the glass, and projects as about average as a defender. Former No. 122 overall recruit and No. 8 center out of Cincinnati.

Our bench will be made up of four redshirt sophomores: SF D.J. Stapleton (84 overall), C Stevie Strong (85 overall), SG Rob Borchardt (83 overall), and PF Kendric Morales (82 overall). Stapleton is another glue guy-style wing who struggles to shoot, Borchardt looks like a potentially really good 3-and-D wing, Morales is a natural center who can shoot, and Strong looks like a solid all-around big.

We also have four true freshmen from the No. 5 recruiting class in America. Each player will redshirt. They are:

PG Arvydas Hardy, 79 overall, C- potential: 6’3 point guard from Mesa, AZ was rated as the No. 12 overall prospect and No. 6 point guard. He’s our second highest-rated recruit ever, and the fourth highest-rated true freshman we’ve ever had.

SF Reece Mascoll, 80 overall, C potential: 6’8 small forward from Riverside, CA looks great but he’s only rated as a 70 in three-point shooting which is a little disappointing. No. 40 overall recruit, No. 4 at his position. He’s tied for the second-highest rated true freshman we’ve ever had.

PF Al Reece, 75 overall, C- potential: 6’11 power forward from Glendale, AZ was rated No. 138 overall, No. 19 at his position.

C Felipe Hopes, 74 overall, B+ potential: 6’11 center from Federal Way, WA was rated No. 139 overall and No. 8 at his position.

Recruiting

We have two available scholarships and want a high-impact shooting guard to pair with last year’s class. We decide to offer the following players:

6’2 PG Cecil Wilkins, No. 9 overall player and No. 4 at his position, out of Cincinnati

6’6 SG Jerald Elliott, No. 35 overall player and No. 9 at his position, out of Sacramento

Wilkins would be our highest-rated recruit ever if we can land him. Elliott looks like he has an ideal mix of size and shooting for an off-guard. There are some solid backup options if we miss out, but it seems worth it to swing for the fences in this situation.

We have high expectations as the No. 13 in the preseason polls. Let’s do this.

Regular season

Here’s what our non-conference schedule looked like:

@ Michigan, Great Alaskan Shootout, vs. St. John’s, @ Ole Miss, @ Florida, @ Stanford, vs. South Florida, @ San Francisco, Gossner Foods Holiday Class, vs. Illinois State.

Who did we do? Well ....

WE BEAT EVERYONE*

*except

Ole Miss.

Yeah, the team that knocked us out in the Final Four last year beat us again to ruin our perfect start. If we draw them again in the tournament I’m probably going to freak out a little bit.

You will notice that Harmon went ham scoring the ball in the loss to Ole Miss. That was also a theme of the non-con slate. Dude was going off for 30+ points every week. He wasn’t just our most consistent scorer by a mile, he dragged us to victories offensively every night. It felt like that man had 20 points by the time he tied his shoes.

We got up to as high as No. 2 in the polls during our non-conference run, and hovered within the top 10 even after it. Now we had to lock down our tourney bid during conference season.

Can we run the table in Summit League play?

Yes we can. We run the table 18-0 in the regular season and then sweep through the Summit League tournament to lock down the automatic bid.

We’re entering the tournament at 33-1 overall.

In terms of how the conference games went, our win over Southern Utah paints a pretty good picture:

Fifty two damn points. Vinnie Harmon dropped 52. Yes, that’s a program record. No, that wasn’t the only time he broke 40 — he also did it on several other occasions. I can’t remember another player who put up big scoring numbers as consistently as he did.

The end of season stats confirm what I suspected: this is the greatest scoring season in Western Illinois history:

Harmon averaged 27.5 points per game — just amazing. That’s the greatest scoring season I’ve ever seen from a ‘Neck. He finished third in the NCAA in points per game only because of some weird glitch that had two players with overall ratings in the 50s averaging close to 40 per game.

I noticed that Harmon has more than 2,200 points for his career. That’s a program record too, surprising the great Roberto ‘Jorts’ Djordjevic who played for us many years ago. He’s only going to add to that total during our tournament run.

Harmon basically took 3x as many shots as everyone else on the team, but shout-out to Doornekamp for still averaging double-figures and hitting 50 percent of his threes. We’re going to need him as much as Harmon for this tournament run.

We’re 33-1! What kind of seed are we going to get??

2040 NCAA tournament

We’re given a No. 3 seed in the NCAA tournament. I thought we had a case for a No. 1 or No. 2 seed, but we’ll take it. That’s our highest seed in many years.

Our opponent in the first round is No. 14 seed Hartford. Hartford is rated as a 77 overall. We’re rated as a 100 overall.

Here’s a look at our roster heading into the tournament:

It’s a roster that’s almost perfect. We have a dominant center in Harmon, a sweet-shooting two guard in Doornekamp, a 6’8 point guard in Pompey. I’m just worried Spanky Fanning, who is tied for our highest-rated player, won’t give us enough three-point shooting to ensure a long run. Having a knockdown shooter at the small forward position has been so critical during some of our earlier runs that I decide to make a change: sophomore Rob Borchardt, who projects as a straight 3-and-D guy, is moving into the starting lineup. Spanky will lead the bench.

Does it feel weird to bench your highest rated player on a team that’s 33-1? Well, yeah. But let’s see how it goes.

Hartford looks completely overmatched in this game. This better be an easy dub:

Win, 100-65. We’re onto the round of 32.

Hartford played valiantly in the first half, and we only led by four points at halftime. Fortunately, we blew the game open coming out of the break and went on to a blowout victory.

The Doornekamp-Harmon inside/outside combo was doing work. Scotty D. went 4-of-7 from three-point range and finished with 25 points. Harmon popped off for 23 points and 14 rebounds on 9-of-20 shooting. Randolph Pompey, our 6’8 point guard, just missed a double-double with eight points and 10 assists. I’m already giving him a Tyrese Haliburton comp.

As for replacing Spanky with Borchardt in the lineup .... we just didn’t look right in the first half. I’m starting to regret that move.

The win sets up a game with No. 6 seed Texas A&M in the round of 32

We draw the Aggies in the second round. They’re significantly better than Hartford, of course, but we’ll still have a noticeable talent advantage against them.

Before the game begins, we’re making a change to the starting lineup: Fanning is back, Borch is going to the bench. I think that was a galaxy brain substitution by coach in his old age. We looked better with Fanning on the floor against Hartford, so we’re hoping that continues.

Sweet 16 on the line. Let’s go!

Win, 96-77! For once, we didn’t have to rely on being a second half team. We crushed them right out of the gates.

This was just a really complete performance from our guys. Everyone contributed. All five starters finished in double-figures, led by another double-double from Vinnie Harmon (19 points, 13 rebounds). Doornekamp was able to hit shots and get to the line, while Pompey (13 points, seven assists, three steals) played another heady two-way game at point guard.

I also thought Fanning played a great all-around game, and really looks like the connective tissue of this team. He finished with 13 points, five assists, three rebounds, and two steals on 4-of-8 shooting.

Great team win. Let’s keep it rolling.

The win sets up a game vs. No. 2 seed Pepperdine in the Sweet 16

Pepperdine has built a great program in this sim and have been consistently getting top seeds in the tournament. They are basically what Gonzaga is IRL.

This will be our biggest challenge of the tournament so far. Can we punch our ticket to the Elite Eight? Let’s go!

Win, 103-95! It started to get a little scary in the second half, but we held on for the win.

The starters really carried us in this one. Harmon was amazing again in what was probably his best game of the tournament so far: 24 points, 13 rebonds, six assists, and five blocks on 10-of-16 shooting. He’s already the program’s all-time leading scorer and keeps adding to his reputation. If he carries us to a championship, does he have a GOAT case?

Harmon also did this in the game and I can’t stop thinking about it:

twitch_clip

Absolute legend.

I love our backcourt so much, too. Randy P. popped off for 20 points and 13 assists with two steals and two blocks. Felt like one of the best point guard performances we’ve ever had. Doornekamp is just the picture of consistency. He finished with 21 points on 7-of-12 shooting.

Another great game for Spanky (15 points, four assists), and Ernesto Mack played well too. How about eight points and a couple of threes from D.J. Stapleton off the bench!?! I’m loving the way we’re coming together right now.

The win sets up a game with No. 4 seed West Virginia in the Elite Eight

The Mountaineers are loaded. They enter the game as a 98 overall. We’re a 100 overall.

West Virginia has a pretty sick roster. They are led by a pair of senior guards rated in the 90s, but it’s their front court that has us shook. WVU has a 7-foot power forward, a 7’1 center, and another 6’11 big man off the bench. Typically we have a huge size advantage in the front court, but that won’t be the case in this one.

I’m nervous. Final Four on the line. One time, ‘Neck Nation. One time. Let’s go!

***

Win, 126-79! Holy hell, we dominated that game. It was such a blow out that we decided to sim to end in the second half.

Just look at our shooting numbers as a team: We hit 44-of-70 shots from the field (63 percent) and 17-of-23 shots from three-point range (74 percent). Did I mention we went 21-of-22 from the line, as well? We really couldn’t miss.

Everyone was so good that it feels foolish to call out individual performances, but let’s do a few shout-outs. RANDY. Our 6’8 lead guard went off for his second straight double-double with 15 points and 10 assists. He’s so good. Scotty D. hung 22 points on an absolutely effortless 5-of-6 shooting from three.

The two hooked up for this alley-oop early in the game:

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Harmon couldn’t make a layup, but did go 11-for-11 from the foul line. All four members of our bench kicked ass too, with each of them finishing in double-figures in scoring.

That was such a killer performance. We’re onto the Final Four!

The win sets up a game with Baylor in the Final Four

Baylor enters as a 98 overall. We’re a 100 overall.

We lost in the Final Four last year and we can’t fathom getting so close only to fall short yet again. Baylor was a team we beat in the Sweet 16 last year, so I’m sure they have revenge on their mind.

We are so close to getting national title No. 8. Don’t stop now, boys. Let’s go!

***

****

Win, 82-71! WE’RE IN THE NATIONAL TITLE GAME.

It wasn’t super pretty, but we got the job done. Scotty did it again. Doornekamp went off for 26 points on 11-of-19 shooting to carry us again offensively. We needed him in this one because Harmon had his first weak game of the tournament, finishing with only seven points but still adding 13 rebounds and three blocks.

Pompey and Fanning were great too. Randy went off for 15 points and six assists, while Spanky had 14 points and five assists on 7-of-9 shooting from the floor. Spanky is the king of the pump fake, apparently:

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We could keep going, but why? We’re about to play for a national title. Let’s get it.

The win sets up a game with Louisville in the national championship

It’s been five years since we last won a national title. That’s a long time for this program.

If we want to catch John Wooden’s 10 national championships before the series ends after Year 40, we need to win this game to get No. 8 for us. We’re playing for all the ‘Necks who fell just short before us.

Only Louisville is standing between us and a title. Let’s go!

***

Win, 82-73! Western Illinois are national champs!

Say it with me: second half team! Louisville looked great in the first half, rattling our guards with a full court press to take a four-point lead going into halftime. I was nervous, but I should have known our guys are always better in the final 20 minutes.

Scott Doornekamp put a bow on an amazing tournament run by dropping 21 points even when he was cold from three-point range (1-of-6). Pompey had his third double-double of the tournament run with 16 points and 11 assists. He also had four steals and a block. Gosh, I love having a 6’8 point guard.

Louisville made a run late to make it interesting in the final minutes. It was a connection from Randy P. to Scotty D. that sealed the win for us.

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We haven’t even talked about Harmon yet. Another monster stat line of 18 points, 22 rebounds, but he needed 24 field goal attempts to get there. While this wasn’t his best game, Harmon was obviously incredible throughout this run. He was already the program’s all-time leading scorer. Now he has a national championship for his GOAT argument, too.

Did I mention he was named tournament Most Outstanding Player? If the Macomb Daily says it, it must be true.

Harmon ends his career with 2,452 total points. I’d like to imagine a 40-something Roberto Djordjevic was in the stands to see the torch get passed.

National title No. 8! We’ll have seven seasons left before the series ends after Year 40. We need two more national titles to tie John Wooden, and three to surpass him. Harmon and Fanning are graduating, but everyone else could be back. Scotty is projected as a first rounder, so we’ll see what does. If he returns, we’ll be thinking about going back-to-back next year.

Holy cow, we just had a 39-1 season. Maybe our best ever??? Let’s raise the banner!

Please clap for my photo editing skills.

Now it’s time to move onto the offseason.

Offseason

National champions for the eighth time under Coach Rick: Western Illinois University. Feels good to write that again.

Harmon and Fanning both get drafted. Again: 2,452 career points for Harmon, a program record. Harmon somehow doesn’t get named an All-American. We’re never getting that coaching point. I’ve lost all respect sorry this is absolutely rigged for money ... Or ratings in not sure which. I won’t be silent .

DOORNEKAMP IS COMING BACK. One more year with Randy and Scotty. We are blessed.

I decline all job offers, replacement an assist, and we’re ready to roll into recruiting.

Recruiting

We have been recruiting for two scholarships all year. While we didn’t land anyone at the early signing period, we do have a player ready to commit on the first day of the spring signing period. Jerald Elliot, a 6’6 shooting guard out of Sacramento, is a ‘Neck.

I’m super excited about this one. Elliott is ranked as the No. 35 overall player in the class and the No. 9 player at his position. He averaged 14 points per game and hit 40.9 percent of his threes on the AAU circuit while also posting nice defensive stats. We needed a two-guard to go along with last year’s four-man class and we think Elliott is perfect for the job.

We lost out on Cecil Wilkins, the top-10 overall point guard prospect we offered, early in the season. We offered his scholarship to another shooting guard, Augustine Bruthelieus, as insurance in case we didn’t get Elliott. While we considered ditching our offer to Bruthelieus to search for a big man, he’s ready to commit and is the highest-rated player available.

Bruthelieus commits to Western Illinois a couple weeks later.

Bruthelieus is rated as the No. 42 overall player and No. 10 shooting guard. The San Diego native looks like he has some intriguing playmaking skills and may eventually end up getting moved to point guard.

I’m feeling good about this class! Now it’s time to make our schedule for next year:

Cyclone Challenge, @ Washington State, vs. Indiana, @ UConn, vs. Illinois, @ Michigan State, @ Colorado State, @ Purdue, vs. Ohio State, @ Arizona

Year 34

Here’s a first look at our roster for Year 34:

We start the year No. 4 in the polls.

Bruthelieus is rated as a 79 overall with C+ potential. Hell yeah. Elliott is a 76 overall with B- potential. Also very good. Both players will redshirt. We also have our sick freshman class from last year joining the rotation after redshirting. I’m super excited for them.

The next stream is tentatively scheduled for Sunday, March 8 at 8:30 p.m. on Twitch. Follow my channel for updates. Go ‘Necks.

For email updates on this series, subscribe here.

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junker-town · 7 years

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Pies, ranked

Our staff ranked pies because we don’t have enough to argue about in the year 2017.

Turkey is the food most closely associated with Thanksgiving. But a close No. 2 on that list is PIE.

One of the most common Thanksgiving Day activities around the country is arguing. (That will certainly be the case this year.) So at SBNation.com, we decided to combine those two very Thanksgiving concepts and argued about pie. (To be clear, SBNation.com staff argues about food most days. We just specifically decided to argue about pie this week.)

We compiled pie rankings from 20 unnamed SBNation.com staffers this week and present the results below. More than three dozen pies received votes, but only 20 received votes on multiple ballots. Only a few were disqualified: flan (which is definitely not a pie but is confusingly included on Wikipedia’s list of pies and tarts); pizza (not a pie; Chicago-style is a metaphysical construct of a troubled people); and cake (which is clearly not a pie).

To maintain objectivity, yours truly did not vote. However, I did provide the commentary you see below. (Do not @ me. Unless you’re providing sweet potato recipes.) Enjoy both this list and the pie debates to come!

Photo by Monica Schipper/Getty Images for NYCWFF

20. Banana Cream

In my experience, a strong banana cream pie is all about quality whipped cream and ripe bananas. Banana cream pie suffers from too short a shelf life; no one wants leftover banana cream pie.

19. Whoopie Pie

Whoopie Pie is not really a pie: it’s two little cakes with a cream filling. But since it’s called a pie and multiple people took its name literally, we’ll allow it. It is delicious!

18. Mississippi Mud Pie

Here we have a highly underrated, quality sweet-tooth delight. You’ve got cake, you’ve got pudding, you’ve got an interesting crust. That Mississippi Mud Pie is only No. 18 shows that despite your allegiance in the Cake-Pie War, pie has a pretty deep bench.

16. Empanadas and Crawfish Pie (tie)

Empanadas are definitely pies. And how versatile they are! I am a cake partisan, but empanadas are definitely more effective miniature treats than cupcakes — especially so compared to the atrocity that is the mini-cupcake. Who authorized the mini-cupcake to exist? It’s just bad, and it’s a disgrace to cakekind. Anyways: empanadas, what a delight!

Crawfish pie is new to me, but looks positively interesting. As the old adage goes: if you like something, stick it in a pie crust, and, hey, that pie will probably be pretty good.

Photo by Pete Souza/White House Photo via Getty Images

14. Apple Crisp and Strawberry Pie (tie)

Apple crisp -- we’ll also lump in apple cobbler or apple crunch, since the differing nomenclature is regional more than substantive, in my reading -- is just wonderful. For my money, no pie on this list benefits more from good vanilla ice cream than a warm apple crisp. And yes, an apple crisp is a pie even though the crust is on the top instead of the bottom. If you have a crust, a sweet or savory filling, and come in a pie plate, you’re a pie.

Strawberry pie is an interesting entrant for me. Strawberry rhubarb is a different story -- we’ll get to it soon -- but basic strawberry pie doesn’t seem like a winner. But perhaps it’s a draw in regions where that particular fruit is less ubiquitous. (In California, the strawberries flow like water.) Strawberry is also, in my opinion, one of the few fruits that works much better as a cake accoutrement than a pie filling. (Pineapple is the all-star of that team.)

12. Strawberry Rhubarb and Peach (tie)

Two serious blue chip fruit pies. If you’re looking for your pie to deliver some delicious damn fruits with a little added spice and flavor in a pastry crust, you can’t go wrong here.

11. Cheesecake

Photo by Sean Gallup/Getty Images

Cheesecake is definitely a pie even though it self-identifies as a cake. It has the crust, the pie plate, the filling. Be wary of anyone who claims they make an amazing cheesecake because cheesecake preferences — sweetness and density, mostly — vary so widely. Cheesecake is like pizza in this way: it’s versatile, but people have hardcore preferences.

Note that pumpkin cheesecake, chocolate cheesecake, and pumpkin chocolate cheesecake all received votes, albeit from a single person who knows what he likes.

AND NOW, A MESSAGE FROM PIE DISSENTER ZITO MADU.

10. Meat Pie

That meat pie is only No. 10 shows our staff’s homerism. Meat pie is great! While we’re here, I am personally offended that pot pie did not rank among our staff. Turkey pot pie is a top-three Thanksgiving leftovers option behind potato waffles and turkey sandwiches.

9. Lemon Meringue

Lemon meringue pie is so wonderful. It mixes the tartness and sourness of Key Lime pie with the fluff and sweetness of a banana cream. How wonderful!

8. Cherry

Classic. Just classic.

7. Chocolate Pie

We lumped chocolate pudding style pies and the ever-excellent chocolate cream pie in here. The chocolate cream pie is more likely to feature a custard than a pudding, but they are close enough. “Hey everyone, let’s throw so creamy chocolate stuff in a crumbly pie crust, and put some whipped cream on top!” Now doesn’t that sound nce?

6. Key Lime Pie

Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images

This is apparently a Key lime pie eating contest from a 2001 Ernest Hemingway festival in Key West. I have never wanted to attend an Ernest Hemingway festival in Key West more than right now.

My personal No. 1. Damn, I want a Key Lime pie right now.

AND NOW, A BRIEF MOMENT IN WHICH THE PIE AND CAKE FANDOMS CAN UNITE IN UNIVERSAL DELIGHT/HORROR.

5. Blueberry

This is perhaps my California bias showing, but I had no idea blueberry pies were so popular. Is this a Southern thing? Is it because (like strawberry pie) is easy to prepare? Is ... is blueberry pie really this good?

4. Sweet Potato

Sweet potato pie is definitely a top-five way to enjoy a sweet potato. This is no slight: there are dozens of ways to enjoy a sweet potato (one of the greatest foods on the planet), and sweet potato is way up there. The one methods that beat it are sweet potato fries, sweet potato hash browns (cooked in bacon grease, of course), honey-roasted sweet potatoes, and baked sweet potatoes. (Please share additional sweet potato recipes with me.)

3. Pecan

Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images

This pie is neck-and-neck with Key Lime for me ... this time of year. I’m not really trying to eat pecan pie in the summer. That crunch, that flavor, that smell. Incredible. Shout out to pecan pie.

2. Pumpkin

A good pumpkin pie is really good. A bad pumpkin pie is a travesty. I’m not sure any pie has a range like pumpkin pie. What’s especially disturbing is that supermarkets and wholesale retailers have turned pumpkin pie into an autumnal loss-leader, selling gargantuan pumpkin pies at cost. Like it’s a dang rotisserie chicken or something. That’s not OK. Treat your pumpkin pies with some respect and maybe they’ll be worth a damn!

But seriously, a good pumpkin pie is so good.

1. Apple

Photo by Eric Thayer/Getty Images

Apple pie won our staff poll in a blow-out, by the way. Apple pie is the Golden State Warriors of piedom. It’s easy to see why. It has a super high-potential crust. It’s fruit. It tastes like fall, pulling that seasonal nostalgia. It goes great with vanilla ice cream. It’s pretty versatile depending on what type of apple you use and whether you go with a standard pastry dough or something more crumb-like. Just a fantastic pie all-around. No weaknesses. All awesome. Apple pie!

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