#seo changbin oneshots

[hyunverse]

1:12 pm — seo changbin.

no warnings. fluff. short drabble.

disclaimer — © 2023 hyunverse on tumblr. all rights reserved. authors works are protected under the copyright law. do not plagiarize or translate my works. tumblr is my only platform.

you have the house all to yourself today.

a yellow sundress settles just above your knee, flowing beautifully because of the wind coming in from the open windows. you love having the house to yourself, gives you the chance to blast your favourite music and spring clean. on lonely days when the house is clean, you like to indulge in your hobbies while a random youtube video plays on the tv screen.

it’s one of those days where you decide to spring clean. after vacuuming the entire house, and dusting off the book shelves (taking extra care with the glass shelf changbin keeps his awards in) it’s time to tend to your plants. pots of healthy indoor plants scatter in the house, vases of colourful flowers sit on empty spots.

changbin loves gifting you flowers. you’ve been together with him for a good amount of years, and in those span of years, he has given you flowers one too many times. almost a weekly occurence, you would say. name any species you can find at the local florist, changbin have probably given it to you at some point. he doesn’t care that there’s no special occasion — a beautiful soul like you deserves to be surrounded by beautiful things, he had told you at some point.

while you water your tulips with fresh cold water, you could hear the bell ring. you whip your head towards the door, eyebrows furrowing as a finger carresses a tulip’s petal. you place the jug of water onto the desk, and wipe your hands on your apron.

no one awaits in front of you door. your view is empty, only a quiet neighborhood save for a car driving away. you squint, furrowing your eyebrows when you realize it’s changbin’s car. you look around once more, light gasp leaving your mouth as soon as your gaze meets the ground. a bouquet of flowers laying there. right after you pick it up, your telephone rings, showcasing “lover” on the screen.

you couldn’t stop your lips from tugging into a smile.

“honey,” his voice greets you on the other line, “do you like them?”

“like them? i love them,” you beam. changbin could imagine the smile on your face, and the sparkle in your eyes — thus he smiles, too.

"the heart shaped flowers are called bleeding hearts — i was shocked to know the name, but it means unconditional love! the purple flowers, heliotropes mean eternal love. the camellias mean adoration. i asked the florist for flowers with meaning," he lightly laughs, "then i chose the flowers you'd love."

you bite your lower lip to stop yourself from crying, "they're perfect, binnie. so perfect.

he hums, the sound vibrates from the speaker and right to your heart, “good, then. i wanted it to be perfect for my honey.”

you melt at his words, “thank you, baby. but tell me, why’d you leave them on the doorstep, hm? why wouldn’t you give it to me in person? i want to see my favorite person.”

changbin sighs — he could picture the pout that adorns your face, “yah, honey. if i saw you, even for just a split second, i wouldn’t want to go back to work. would want to stay in your arms the whole day.”

“seo changbin — you’ve been married to me for three years now, and yet you still have no self control!” you click your tongue, laughing breathily. truth is, your heart’s warming at his words.

“how could one have self control when they’re in front of a goddess like you?” he rolls his eyes, “i’ve got to go now, love you sweetheart.”

“love you too, binnie.”

disclaimer — © 2023 hyunverse on tumblr. all rights reserved. authors works are protected under the copyright law. do not plagiarize or translate my works. tumblr is my only platform.

#k-labels #seo changbin x reader #changbin x reader #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #changbin skz x reader #changbin fluff #seo changbin fluff #changbin drabbles #changbin drabble #seo changbin drabbles #seo changbin drabble #changbin oneshots #seo changbin oneshots #changbin imagines #seo changbin imagines

[fantastic-bby]

Love is a Waiting Game (Teaser)

Pairing: Ryujin x Changbin, OC x Changbin

Word count: 1.9k

Genre: Slice of Life | Crack-ish | College AU

Seo Changbin has a bit of an odd life. He finds himself waiting quite a lot. Especially when he’s faced with Shin Ryujin, a shy woman with a love for bomber jackets and her eccentric group of friends who always seem to find a way to put her in strange situations.  But Changbin finds himself realising that there’s nothing that makes him wait more than love when he tries to get closer to Ryujin, who’s still struggling to find herself but also can’t seem to resist his advances.

Publish date of full fic: 5th August

Full fic details

Word count: 37k

Genre: Romance | Fluff | Angst | Slice of Life | Bittersweet | College AU

Tags + Warnings: Mentions of blood | Mentions of corpses | Past gang involvement | Violence | Marijuana usage | Alcohol usage | Themes of sexuality/asexuality | A bit of insecurity surrounding the topic of that

Masterlist | Full fic | Ao3 Link

Adventures of Campus Masterlist

...

“You guys want to get started on another one?” Jisung suggests, lollipop stuck in between his lips as he sits on the swivel chair sideways, legs dangling off of the armrest of one of them and his head hanging off of the other. His nonchalance seems to rub off on his friends from how calm and chill Jisung can get; the first example being how he’s currently sitting on the chair while he chews on a lollipop. 

Yes. 

Chews.

“Eh, what’s the harm in that?” Raisha shrugs from the couch with her bass in her lap. She’s been playing it to herself the past few hours while the guys busy themselves with lyrics and the actual mastering of the music. Well, it’s actually just Chan that’s mastering the track while Changbin writes lyrics. Jisung is lazing away in his chair and throwing suggestions left and right or picking up his guitar to play anything that he thinks fits the vibe of the track. 

“Let’s actually get the lyrics done on this one before we move on to another song,” Chan chuckles. 

“Changbin, how far into the lyrics are you?” Jisung asks as he allows his chair to turn to face him. 

“Not that far,” he sighs. “I don’t know what else to write. Nothing’s coming to mind when I listen to this track.” 

“Then write about that,” he shrugs. 

A moment passes before the both of them suddenly shoot upright and stare at each other with bright eyes. 

“An idea!” they yell at the same time.

“You’re a genius!” Changbin laughs excitedly as he starts scribbling down lyrics onto the page. Jisung grabs his own notebook as well, finally sitting in his chair properly, and writes down his own lyrics. Chan seems to have his own spark of inspiration from seeing the two of them while Raisha watches in amusement. 

“You guys really just bounce off of each other huh?” she chuckles. She only laughs more when they seem so immersed in writing lyrics that they don’t seem to have heard her and she returns her attention back to their bass to allow them the space to spew their creativity onto their notebooks. 

Another half an hour passes and Jisung’s the first to shoot from his chair with his notebook, “I’m done!” 

“You are actually sent by God,” Chan chuckles in disbelief as Jisung places the notebook on the table in front of him and he lets his eyes skim over it. “Run into the recording booth and let’s get it onto the track.” 

“Yes sir!” 

Changbin watches with a fake grimace on his face at how quickly Jisung has finished writing the lyrics, but it slowly fades into an, almost, proud smile. He isn’t entirely surprised since Jisung’s proven to be extremely fast when it comes to writing lyrics and he proved it the first time when Raisha dared him to fit a whole chocolate muffin the size of his fist into his mouth. Right after Jisung swallowed it, he wrote two verses and a new guitar riff in the span of half an hour. 

He glances at Raisha who watches Jisung with a small smile on her face as Chan starts the recording and he starts rapping. 

“He’s actually pretty damn good,” Raisha chuckles. 

“He’s fucking amazing,” Changbin corrects her with a laugh. He leans back on his arms and watches the way the lyrics flow out of Jisung’s mouth so effortlessly, the sound flooding through the studio monitors on Chan’s desk. 

“That’s perfect, Sung, thank you,” Chan praises when he pauses the track. “Get out here and give it a listen.” Jisung bounces in his spot for a moment before rushing out of the room. 

But right before Chan starts the track, there’s a knock on the door that has all of them turning their heads. 

“I’ll get it. You guys just keep working,” Changbin says and stands up off of the floor. 

After Jisung’s sudden appearance, the idea of someone knocking on the door of the music room in the middle of the night stopped being so surprising. 

Changbin opens the door and his eyes almost pop out of his skull when he’s faced with a woman who can’t be any older than Jisung. Her hair’s dyed dark blue and cut right above her shoulders as she looks at him with her hands stuffed into the pockets of her black bomber jacket. 

Holy shit, she’s gorgeous. 

“Is Raisha Lo here? One of my friends said that she’s usually in the music room at this hour.”

“It’s three a.m., but yeah,” he nods. “She’s in the recording room—c-come on in.”  Changbin closes the door when she walks past him and he feels like he’s going to pass out when she smiles at him. Music floods through the corridor of the room as he brings her down and into the recording room. “Raisha,” he calls once Chan pauses the track and Jisung lets out a bashful giggle at another praise from him.  

Raisha turns at the call of her name and she makes eye contact with the woman, eyes widening as she puts her bass down. 

“Oh god, I completely forgot you were coming,” she blurts out. “Sorry, Ryujin.” 

“It’s fine. I was actually considering cancelling because I was just at a party with one of my friends,” she claims politely, standing straight with her hands clasped in front of herself. 

Chan and Jisung turn around to see who’s entered the room and they wave back at Ryujin when she waves smally at them. 

“These are my friends; Chan, Changbin, and Jisung. We basically camp here every night, so you might just start camping here, too,” Raisha explains, laughing slightly when Ryujin smiles. 

Changbin feels his heart starting to flutter in his chest when she sees the way her eyes crinkle at the corner and her cheeks lift in a way where it looks like she has whiskers.

Oh my god, she’s so cute. 

He thinks his chest is going to fucking explode the longer he watches her. The back of her black bomber jacket has a red dragon printed along the width of it; starting at the sleeve of her left shoulder all the way to the right. 

“Who’s this?” Jisung asks, his hand raising to point directly at her. 

Which only earns a smack from Chan and a grumble about him being rude. 

“This:” Raisha starts as she stands beside Ryujin, “is Shin Ryujin. She’s a first year and she’s taking one of the courses from the media school. I’m her music mentor.” 

“Where’d you two meet? I didn’t realise we were doing mentors,” Chan claims as he looks between the two.

“Raisha’s friends with one of my seniors. He said that if I wanted a music mentor then to come to one of you guys and I figured she was the least intimidating out of all of you,” Ryujin shyly explains, voice soft in comparison to how loud her outfit is. 

“Well, you came to the right place,” he smiles. “We’re actually in the middle of recording something for a song of ours. So, you can take over the jamming room if you want some privacy or you can choose a spot here and just hang out with us.” 

She turns to Raisha with a questioning look but the bassist smiles and pats her back gently. 

“What if we just spend tonight watching these guys work?” 

“I’m alright with anything,” Ryujin claims.

“You wanna hear what we’re working on?” Jisung asks as he moves away from Chan for a moment. When she nods, he smacks Chan’s shoulder with the back of his hand. 

“You ask me nicely or I’m going to throw you through the window, Ji,” he grumbles. 

“Be nice,” Raisha snaps. He looks at her for a moment before pouting and turning back to the computer, grumbling something under his breath while trying to ignore Jisung’s smug smirk as Chan presses play on the track. “Come,” she quietly urges and pulls Ryujin to the couch where they both sit. 

Changbin returns to his spot on the floor where he picks up his lyric book and runs through what he has now, bobbing his head along with the music as he mutters the words to himself as the music plays. 

The music pauses after a moment and Changbin loses himself in his own bubble as he runs through the lyrics in his head, almost forgetting that Ryujin is now there, watching as Chan and Jisung start discussing what else to do with the track. 

Ryujin’s attention shifts to Changbin and she watches the way he mutters the lyrics as though he’s reciting something. Raisha’s arm nudges hers slightly, “talk to him.” She turns to the older woman with wide eyes, but she only nods and smiles. “He looks scary, but he’s really just a softie on the inside.”

“He’s on the rugby team,” Ryujin whispers, intimidated even by the mere idea of approaching him. 

“Yeah, because he likes rugby,” Raisha chuckles softly. “I promise, once you get to know him, he’s not as big and scary as he seems. Just give it a shot.”

Ryujin stares at her for a moment longer and takes a deep breath before nodding. She’s not sure what she’s supposed to be doing here anyway—Ryujin’s just here because she thought Raisha was sweet the first time they met and she wanted to get to know her more. Also, she’s genuinely interested in what she has to offer in terms of music, so she thought she’d give Raisha a chance. 

Changbin doesn’t even notice when Ryujin slides off of the couch to sit beside him, her hand hovering over his shoulder before she pulls it away and leans closer instead. 

“What are you working on?” Her voice practically pops Changbin’s bubble and he almost short-circuits when he realises that Ryujin’s talking to him. 

“O-Oh, just some lyrics,” he says while clearing his throat. “We’re trying something… about having a major creative block… because we all had a creative block. But if you give Jisung any topic, he’ll come up with lyrics or a melody right after he eats something sweet; it’s a thing for him.”

“Ah,” she hums.

“Do you… want to see what I have so far?” Changbin offers as he lifts his notebook slightly. Ryujin’s eyes lighten a bit and it sends his heart through the roof. 

“Sure,” Ryujin nods and leans slightly closer to read his notebook. Raisha purses her lips together when she smiles, standing from the couch to approach Chan and Jisung once she’s certain that Changbin and Ryujin are too preoccupied to notice. 

“Look,” she whispers, leaning down to Chan’s ear so that both of them can hear her. All three of them turn around to see the way Changbin’s bubble seems to have formed once again, only this time, Ryujin is in it as well. 

“Woah,” Chan chuckles, leaning back in slight disbelief. “She’s burst his bubble.”

“No, no,” Jisung shakes his head. “I think she’s in his bubble.”

“They’re kinda cute together, don’t you think?” Raisha points out. 

“Their styles look like they were made for each other.”

“And she reminds me of when Changbin first showed up here.” 

Raisha smiles at the way Ryujin laughs at something that Changbin says softly, his eyes practically turning into hearts when he sees the way she reacts. 

“He is so going to fall in love with her.”

#stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids oneshots #itzy #itzy imagines #itzy oneshots #seo changbin #seo changbin imagines #seo changbin oneshots #changbin #changbin imagines #changbin oneshots #shin ryujin #shin ryujin imagines #shin ryujin oneshots #ryujin #ryujin imagines #ryujin oneshots

[skzstannie]

"Do you want to start over?"

SKZ-> Bang Chan x Reader

genre: angst, hurt/comfort, exes to lovers wc: ~4,100 cw: arguments, mentions of alcohol and Chan's drunk, use of Y/N (soz, I tried not to), reader’s a university student

summary: a fun night out leads to a much needed confrontation

A/N: Hiii! Some romantic angst for today with Chan. I'm on break for the holidays, so expect lots of fics during the next few weeks!

Happy Scrolling! | Masterlist

"We have got to get out more! This is so fun!" your friend yells over the loud music playing in the bar.

The time reads 12:30 A.M, and as much fun as this is, you can't deny the fact you're getting tired.

"For real, I could go all night!" another one of your friends says, her arms swinging over her head to the beat of the music.

Your eyes widen at that- all night?

"Come on Y/N, dance! You don't even look like you're having fun." They grab your arms, swaying you back and forth.

You let them have their fun for a few more songs, allowing your whole body to feel the music.

The time slips away from you, the rampant atmosphere providing you a distraction from your drowsiness. Your alcohol intake is definitely a factor, as well.

Your phone rings in your pocket, bringing you back to reality. You unlock it to reveal Changbin's name. You haven't heard from him, or any of your ex's other friends, since the breakup. Not that you were expecting to, but it's definitely strange for him to be calling you now.

Figuring it could be an emergency, you excuse yourself from the dance circle your friends have created and step outside to take the call.

"Hello?" you answer, your voice timid.

"Hello? Y/N?" you hear from the other side. He sounds a little out of breath, a hint of panic coming through.

"Yea, Changbin, is everything alright?" you question, your concern growing.

"Um, kinda? I don't know," he responds, sounding distracted. He sounds distant now, like he's pulled the phone away from his ear.

"Where are you? Do you need help?"

"Well, I'm with Chan. We're in the park, just off your university campus. He's refusing to go home until he sees you. He's pretty wasted right now, but I can't get him to come home, so I figured giving you a call was worth a shot."

Your breath hitches in your throat when you hear Chan's slurred words in the background. "Is-is that Y/N? Let me talk to her."

"No, Chan, just sit back down." You hear some shuffling from the other side before Changbin's voice becomes clearer again. "Hello? Are you still there?"

You debate hanging up. This was not supposed to happen tonight. Your friends brought you out to forget about him, not go and see him all desperate and drunk for you. Somewhere in the back of your tipsy mind, you know you want to see him, to touch him one more time.

Your breakup was sad for both you and Chan. You were the one who ended it. It was nothing Chan did; you were just far too stressed with everything you had going on, and you didn't feel like it was fair to Chan. He was always busy with producing, and if he wasn't producing, he was in meetings or hanging with the boys.

You always had class and work, and you felt like you were starting to neglect your studies. With you nearing the end of your degree, entering your senior year a few months prior, that was the last thing you needed.

So, for the sake of both of your education and futures, you broke it off. It was sudden, and you caught him completely off guard with it.

You remember how absolutely heartbroken he sounded, the sounds of his choked up words forever tattooed on your brain. "What do you mean? Did I do something wrong?" He'd grabbed your hands, pulling them close to his chest. His heartbeat was erratic, similar to his breathing, and the tears welled in his eyes so fast you feared they'd spill over before you could even respond.

"I just think it's for the best," you had replied. You were cold and emotionless with it, trying to protect your own heart in the process of breaking his. You never did tell him why you were ending it. You were scared he'd call you ridiculous, saying that that's no reason to breakup, and that he could fix it.

That's not what you had wanted to hear at the time. You felt you were doing the right thing for both of you.

It had been months since then, and your heart never healed. You still loved him, but you were always too embarrassed to reach out. After all, it was your fault. You were the one who broke up with him, not the other way around.

You never heard from any of the other boys either. You knew they were a tight-knit group, so you assumed they hated you. You hated yourself too, in a way. You broke his heart into a million pieces and never even told him why.

You wanted him. You needed him, so so bad. You've been waiting for this moment for months. Sure, maybe you weren't expecting him to be completely wasted, but you couldn't let this opportunity slip. Your friends would be upset, probably tell you it was a bad idea and drag you home. That's why you weren't going to tell them the details.

"Where are you? I'm coming to get him." You hear Changbin's sigh of relief from the other side of the phone as he tells you exactly where they are.

You hang up and send a quick text to your friends who are no doubt still dancing up a storm inside the bar. You're brief with them, telling them something came up and you have to run home. You don't wait for their reply, hurrying off to hopefully fix the biggest mistake of your life.

~ ~ ~

"Y/N, thank God you came. He's been out of his mind for hours now," Changbin tells you as you walk up to them. You see Chan sitting on the park bench beside him, and his head whips up at the sound of your name.

Chan's eyes widen at the sight of you. He jumps up, stumbling a bit, but he's able to regain his balance. He's surprisingly quick in making his way over to you.

You can smell the alcohol on him from a few feet away, but you don't pay it any mind as he throws himself at you, his arms heavily hanging over your shoulders. "Y/N," he slurs, "You're here."

He sighs into your neck, his head leaning to rest on your shoulder. Your arms come up around his waist, holding him up. He's not putting all his weight on you, but you still struggle to keep him upright, his drunken state making it hard for him to stand straight.

You look to Changbin, your arms straining around Chan's body. "What should we do?" you ask him. You're not sure what the rest of Changbin's plan was. You come here to see him, then what? Take him home? Send them back on their way? You're not entirely sure which you'd prefer, to be honest.

"I wanna go home with you," Chan whines in response before Changbin has a chance.

"I don't know, Chan, I don't think-" Changbin is quick to cut you off.

"I'll help him to your place." He walks over to you guys, practically ripping Chan off you. He drapes one of Chan's arms over his shoulders, holding up most of his weight.

You stop and think for a moment.

What are you doing!? You can't bring your ex back home! Your tipsy, and he's absolutely wasted. Even if you were to ever reconcile, you certainly didn't want it to be under these circumstances.

"Changbin, I-"

"Nope, this is your mess, and you know you need to fix it." He starts to drag Chan in the direction of your apartment, Chan letting out incoherent babbles along the way.

You're still stood in the same spot, but you rush to catch up to them.

"Excuse me?" you let out in disbelief.

"You heard me," he sasses back, leaning forward to make eye contact with you around Chan's hanging head. "You know what you did wasn't right, and I know you regret it."

Your jaw drops. How did he know this?

"You can't just assume I've wanted to run back to him all this time," you rebut, draping Chan's other arm over your own shoulders to help him walk a little steadier.

"I'm not assuming anything. Your roommate told me. We know you've been just as much of a wreck as he has been."

You scoff but leave it at that. How could you argue when he knew? He knew that you've been struggling ever since, crying day and night. Embarrassment washes over your body, already planning out the conversation you'll have with your roommate about sharing your personal problems with your ex's best friends.

It's silent for a few minutes. You're nearing your complex now, the light from the streetlights dimming, transitioning into the light from your neighbors' porchlights.

"How much did she tell you?" You ask as the three of you approach your front door.

"Enough to know you need this just as much as he does."

~ ~ ~

You unlock your front door, Chan breaking free from Changbin's hold and stumbling into your apartment. You watch from the foyer as he trips over his own two feet, falling onto the couch. You allow your gaze to travel over to Changbin, assured that Chan will be staying in one spot for at least a few minutes.

"You ok?" he asks, his concern for you showing for the first time that night.

While your roommate never made it known to you, the boys had texted her just days after the breakup, asking what had happened. She had explained your side of things to them, and she made them promise not to tell Chan. She didn't want to meddle in your love life like that. As stupid as she thought you were being, it wasn't her place, or his friend's place, to tell him anything.

They agreed not to tell Chan anything, if and only if she agreed to keep them updated on you.

"I'm fine. Yea, this is fine," you rub your hands over your face, trying get rid of the tiredness surely covering your features.

"I'll text you guys tomorrow afternoon," he says, turning to head back to the front door. You follow him, seeing him out.

He steps outside, turning back around and catching the door before you can close it. "I know we sprung this on you, but don't stress out about it. Just do what feels right," and with that he turns and walks down the stairs, not waiting for your reply.

You slowly the close the door, allowing your back to slide down it. You sit on the floor, your elbows resting on your knees, palms holding your head up.

Your heart races knowing who waits for you in your living room. What do you say? Do you wait until morning to hash it out? That would probably be best, but what if he wants to talk about it now?

Heavy footsteps bring you out of your thoughts. Your eyes snap up from the ground, seeing Chan making his way towards you.

He clumsily settles himself in front of you, crossing his legs as he leans back on his arms, his palms resting flat on the floor behind him.

His eyes are glossed over from the alcohol, a lazy smile gracing his lips. "I've missed you."

Your heart flutters at that. You feel the familiar feeling of butterflies in your stomach, and you're not entirely sure how to respond. With the exhaustion from your night's activities taking over your body, all you really want to do is go to sleep. Your mind is not in the right space to have a conversation with him right now.

"What do you want me to say, Chan?" you let out a breathy chuckle, your cheeks flushing pink. As tired as you are, his words still have an affect on you.

"Preferably that you've missed me, too."

"This isn't the right time to have this conversation. You're drunk, and I'm tipsy and exhausted. Let's go to bed, and I promise we'll talk about it in the morning," you tell him, rising to your feet. You reach a hand out to him, offering him help to stand.

His face morphs into a pout, and he holds out his pinky towards you from his spot on the floor. "Promise?" his voice wobbles, tears springing into his eyes. He'd always been an emotional drunk, his vulnerable side surfacing at the mere sight of alcohol.

Pinky promises had always been your thing when you were together. Until this day, neither of you had ever broken one. It was honestly a really important part of your relationship. Your plans would fall through sometimes, or somebody would forget to pick up dinner, but if you guys pinky promised, you knew you could fully trust them. Him remembering this in his drunken state does something to your insides, pulling on your heart strings a bit.

You hesitate, taking your lip in between your teeth, but eventually latch your pinky onto his.

"Pinky promise."

~ ~ ~

"Alright, here's a couple blankets and a pillow. The T.V. remote is right there, and I'll get you a glass of water and some ibuprofen for the morning. Anything else?" You set the bedding onto the couch, smoothing out the sheet you had laid there beforehand.

"Hmmm," he hums, bringing his finger up to his lips, portraying a very exaggerated thinking face. "Will you stay with me?" He tilts his head at you, patting the spot beside him.

"I will not. I will be sleeping in my own bed."

He pouts at that, and you quickly turn away, fearing you won't be able to hold strong if you look at him much longer.

You get ready for bed, making your way around your apartment turning all the lights off. You flip the lights out in the living room, the television providing a soft glow to it's surroundings.

"Goodnight Chan, sleep well." You wait a few seconds for a reply, but all you hear in return is his heavy breathing, small snores escaping his lips every now and again.

~ ~ ~

You're awakened from your slumber at the sound of your door creaking open. Your head jumps off your pillow, abruptly sitting up in bed.

You let your defenses down upon seeing Chan's face, slightly puffy with sleep.

"Do you need something?" you ask softly. You glance beside you at your alarm clock.

4:43 A.M. Way too early to get up.

He doesn't respond, the only noise in the room coming from the sounds of his socks shuffling against your soft carpet. He makes his way to the side of your bed, looking down at you sleepily.

"Chan, go back to bed. It's too early." You roll back over, too tired to play any games so early in the morning.

It's silent for a moment, and you almost allow yourself to fall back to sleep, but you jolt at the feeling of your bedding dipping behind you. Chan pushes up against your back, moving you further away from the edge of the bed.

He slides underneath the covers behind you, his strong arm coming up to wrap around your middle, pulling you closer to him.

He's incredibly warm, and you can't help but cuddle into him further, feeding off the heat his body is providing you.

He lets out a long sigh, his breath blowing up against the back of your head.

You lay there, stiff as a board. Your mind wanders to all the nights spent like this when you were together. How nice it always felt to lay in his arms, comforted and safe. You breathe deeply, inhaling his woodsy scent you've missed all those months.

His breathing has slowed and evened by this point, and you're sure he's fallen back asleep. You do the same just minutes later, unable to resist the invisible pull of your eyelids, shutting them and allowing you to fall asleep once again.

~ ~ ~

You're eyes open and you're met with the bright sunrays coming through your window, making you squint. You feel around behind, the warm body next to you nowhere to be seen, leaving nothing but the cold sheets in his place.

You jump out of bed, scared he may have run off early in the morning. Scrambling, you throw on a hoodie from your floor and hurry out your bedroom door, rushing towards the living room.

You stop in your tracks when you get there, seeing him sitting on your couch, legs crossed over each other on your coffee table.

You stand there another few moments, waiting for him to see you. He turns his body, "Are you just gonna stand there?" he asks, the teasing evident in his voice.

You don't know what to make of all this. He should hate you. He should've left as soon as he felt well enough this morning. You broke his heart for God's sake. You broke his heart into a million pieces, and never even tried to put them back together.

You slowly make your way over to him, sitting beside him on your couch, making sure to leave a safe amount of distance between the two of you.

"Sooo..." you start as he clears his throat. You both laugh, the awkward tension slowly melting.

"You go first," you tell him. You weren't really sure what you were going to say anyway.

"I apologize for last night. From making Changbin call you, to making you take me home, to getting in your bed in the middle of the night. I'm sorry if I crossed boundaries, I mean, I'm sure I did," he looks to you for assurance that it's ok if he keeps going.

You give him a small shoulder shrug. You don't know if he really did cross any boundaries. He obviously didn't make you take him home. If you really didn't want him here, you would've told Changbin yesterday. As persistent as he seemed last night, you know he wouldn't have pushed that hard if you were truly uncomfortable.

"It's ok. I answered the phone call, I brought you here, and I let you in my bed. This goes both ways, and if I wasn't comfortable with it, I wouldn't have let it happen."

His eyes soften at this, his shoulders releasing the visible tension he's been holding there all morning. "Ok, good." He hesitates for a moment, wringing his hands in his lap. "I guess, I just wanna know why, ya know? Why did you end things the way you did?" His eyes meet yours, and it's hard for you to decipher the emotion behind them. Anger, sadness, regret- you're not sure. You're pretty sure they're all present to some degree.

You pretend to think, although you know in your heart you don't have to. You know exactly why you ended; if only you'd let him in on it a little sooner, it probably would've saved him a lot of heartache.

"I was overwhelmed," you pause for a moment, and he nods his head, encouraging you to keep going. "I had so much going on, school was hectic, my job had my head all over the place, and I felt like what I had left to give you just wasn't enough."

He doesn't say anything for a few moments, his eyes glued to his hands. "You could've just talked to me about it. I would've understood, and we could've figured it out." His voice comes out weak, like I've struck a nerve that was never meant to be touched, let alone toyed with and tore.

"That was exactly what I was scared of. I really thought that what I was doing was what was best for both of us."

"You don't get to make that call, Y/N," his words come out strong, his eyes finally meeting yours. "I loved you, and I still love you," he scoffs, "Can you believe that? After all the hell you put me through, I still love you." He gets up from the couch and begins to lightly pace in front of the T.V.

He runs hands through his hair, brushing it back from his eyes. Tears well up in yours, and you quickly wipe them before they even get the chance to fall. You don't deserve to cry. You did this to him.

"I'm so sorry," you choke out. "I regret it. I regret it all. I can't imagine how much I hurt you, but I know I did, deeply. I want to make sure you know that it wasn't easy for me, either. I haven't been myself all these months. I stopped going to my classes, and last night was the first night I'd gone out in months."

He stops his pacing, standing right in front of you. He just stares, and your emotions run wild when you can't decipher how he's feeling.

"I'm so sorry," the tears you tried to keep at bay flow freely down your face now, "If I'd have known what it would do to both of us, I would never have done it. It was a stupid, spur of the moment decision, and I felt like I had control. If I had the control, everything would be ok," your words break through your sobs, "but it wasn't ok, and I'm so, so sorry!" Your hands cover your eyes, your head bowing to your knees to hide your grief-stricken face.

He still stands there, in the same spot, just staring. You're too overwhelmed by your own guilt to notice him moving closer to you at a feverish pace.

He rips your hands from your face, pulling your wrist until you're standing in front of him. He forcefully grabs your jaw, bringing his lips to yours. The kiss is short, but you've never known such passion could be passed on through a kiss.

All the pent up anxiety and guilt melts between the two of you, your emotions mixing together like sugar and water, dissolving between the two of you until they're one.

He pulls back, his breathing quick. "I've been wanting to do that for so long."

You look at him, shock prominent on your face. "How can you do this?"

His eyes widen, scared he's crossed the line yet again. "What?" he stutters.

"Why don't you hate me? I expected you to yell at me, maybe even call me a few names. Why are you standing in my living room kissing me like all this never happened?"

"I could never hate you," his fingers run along your jaw before settling softly on your cheek. "As much as I’ve wanted to these last few months, just to help myself get over you, I could never. I've been going crazy without you."

"How could you forgive me, just like that?" You're confusion seeps through your tone.

"Because you're perfect. We all make mistakes, and I've had months to deal with this one. Now, knowing why you did it makes it all the easier."

You still just stare at him, almost expecting him to say "Just kidding", laugh in your face, and run out the door.

But he doesn't. He's still standing in front of you, holding your face so gently that you can barely feel his calloused hand, his fingers gently caressing your cheek.

"I know this is a lot, and maybe I'm crazy, but do you want to start over?"

Your confusion becomes more evident, your brows furrowing lightly.

"Let's redo all our firsts. Our first date, our first kiss, our first 'I love you'. I'm willing to move past this if you are."

His eyes are filled with hope, sparkling in the light coming in from the window.

"I don't know Chan..." you trail off, "I'm not sure I can ever forgive myself. I hate what I did to you, and I've hated myself ever since because of it. I don't know how to come to terms with your forgiveness when I don't deserve it."

"We can work through it together. I will be there with you every step of the way. I promise, pinky promise," he's persistent, his pinky reaching out towards yours.

You stare at his hand, remembering how nicely your hands fit together. That's how everything feels with Chan. Your body has always fit perfectly with his, your personalities meshing like nothing you've ever experienced before.

"So what do you say?" your gaze raises until it meets his, and you realize you'll never be able to say no to those eyes. "Will you go on a date with me?" His smile widens, his pearly teeth on full display.

"I think- I think I'd like that a lot."

#stray kids #skz #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz oneshots #stray kids oneshot #stray kids imagines #skz imagines #bang chan #stray kids bang chan #skz bang chan #bang chan x reader #bang chan x female reader #bang chan x you #changbin #seo changbin #skz angst #stray kids angst #bang chan angst #bang chan hurt/comfort #skz hurt/comfort #stray kids hurt/comfort #exes to lovers

[changisworld]

Skz biggest kinks & pleasures (hyung line)

18+, MDNI, I'm not putting smut warnings as a surprise for readers but it's all just smut, don't read if underage.

Word Count:2,933

©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.

main masterlist here maknae line version here

BANGCHAN: CHOKING

This man is just dominant through & throughout when it comes to sex. Don't get me wrong he can definitely be a huge softie & the aftercare never is anything below 10/10, You both enjoy the dynamics you have both talked about, that being sub & dom dynamics.

You're currently under him with your legs around his waist as he has your nipples between his fingers as he is sucking yet another line of hickies into your neck as your hand is wrapped around his length, jerking it slowly as you share small moans. He releases his lips from your neck with a small suction noise before he slithers his way down you slightly, making you release your grip from around him & you let out a disappointed whine but it's short lived as his lips attach to your nipples as he slides two fingers into you, making you thrust your hips subconsciously into them, weaving your fingers into his dark hair & tugging on it slightly as you wriggle as much as you can while he is still laying on you.

His hand finds its way up to your neck before putting a small ounce of pressure on it which makes a higher pitched noise come out of you & you can feel him smirk beneath you.

He gives equal attention to both tits as you push down on his fingers ever so often, hinting for him to put more pressure on your neck, which he has absolutely no issue doing.

"Like having my hands wrapped around you that badly, babe?" he smirks to you as he removes his fingers from your dripping hole when he feels you clenching more than usual, edging you (this is definitely another huge kink of his).

He smirks as he removes his hand from your neck, letting out deep breaths as you no longer have the restriction but it doesn't last long as he lines himself up to your now gushing pussy as he leans over you again, kissing on the reddened skin of where his hand was, turning your head to the side for better access as he finally slides inside, you letting out a hum as you grip onto his arms, him making a deep groan noise which is music to your ears.

He begins to thrust at a slow pace, giving you the curtsey of allowing you to get used to having his cock stretching you out, your nails now digging into his arms, making him let out a few hisses between groans & kisses. He hits an extra deep spot when he changes position & rhythm which makes you squeal & he quickly throws his lips onto yours, swallowing your moans so they're not bouncing off the walls as much, his hand obviously sliding back up to your neck in the meantime, making it harder for you to kiss him back.

"You need'a be quiet sweetie, don't want Jeongin to hear, he's still home babe." he huskily whispers out after breaking the kiss, noses basically touching as he watches your eyes roll backwards, right before pulling out. "Flip over f'me, my pretty girl." he speaks out as he jerks himself off, helping you flip over anyway as your legs & breath are both shaky, placing a pillow beneath your pelvis.

LEEKNOW: RIMMING

This man has been so secure in his sexuality since LIKE FOREVER so this isn't a shock to anyone that he enjoys rimming. He does not care whatsoever when it comes to 'roles' during sex, he just likes to go with the flow. This man can be the biggest sub on earth & beg for every touch & can also switch to the most pain loving dom on earth. Nothing makes Leeknows toes curl more than when you are giving him oral (sloppy & with plenty of spit ofc) & letting plenty of spit drip onto his pretty hole before he takes it apon himself to hold his legs back so you can suckle on there too.

You've been jerking him off on your shared couch for the pst couple of minutes, his hips jerking into your hand as you're using your thumb to spread his gallons of precum along his angry red tip.

"cmon jagi, just put your lips on me, come n get a taste" he teases & chuckles & you chuckle back, not with him but at him. His cheeks are so red & his bunny teeth have made his bottom lip swollen from the constant nibbling on it but yet he's still trying to tell you what to do.

You roll your eyes before giving into his commands (because how couldn't you) & don't waste any time before taking him into your mouth & hollowing your cheeks as your tongue swirls around every inch of it it can reach despite the heaviness of his dick resting on it, paying extra attention to the underside of his tip as he is the most sensitive there as your fingers fondle his balls which makes him throw his head back, hips stuttering as he tries to hold himself back from thrusting into your mouth, because he knows if he does, you won't give him what he really wants.

This goes on for a few minutes & he is taking continuous deep breaths as his hair is now sticking to his face, enjoying the moment but you both know just head isn't enough to make this man see stars anymore. "y/nnie, g-go lower, pret-pretty please" he whines as you pop off his cock with a loud suction noise, letting all the built up spit that hasn't already leaked out from the ides of your mouth while he was in your mouth drip out onto his cock as you use it as lube to jerk off with, making eye contact with him as you still fondle his balls.

"Ah you want me to lick your pretty hole, hmm? Hold your legs f'me then, since you deserve it, don't you? Been so good for me." you say in a soft voice & he nods his head, letting out a 'uh huh' as he wraps his hands around the back part of his knees & pulls them back, allowing you as much access as you need to see & get right up against his now spit covered, pretty pink hole.

You scrape your fingers against his thighs as you sink slightly lower on your knees & lick a slow circle of eight along the full thing & he instantly moans, way louder than when you were sucking his cock not even two minutes ago.

You begin to slurp on it as your fingers reach back up for his balls & cock, fondling & jerking him off, his cock leaking more than a broken faucet.

You allow all spit that forms in your mouth to roll off your tongue straight onto his rim, making him let out whines that anyone in the street can hear, his hips grinding against your tongue, his eyebrows furrowed as you are eating him as if it's the last thing you will ever be able to taste, Leeknows hand now jerking himself off as you slide a finger inside him, making him shriek & not even five seconds after you begin to feel for & locate his Gspot, he is cumming all over his own abs as his eyes roll back & legs shake in his hands.

you keep tasting him but slow down until his orgasm finally dissolves & he gives you a smirk, looking down at your drool covered face before you crawl up his frame & kissing him, allowing him to taste himself & he hums in approval. "your tongue i-is honestly the best thing on this earth." he pants out which makes you blush as you kiss him again.

CHANGBIN: FEMINIZATION/ MOMMY KINK

Just by looking at Changbin with one glance, anyone would assume he not so physically wears the pants in the bedroom due to his stature but that is not the case. Infact, there is nothing that turns this man on more than wearing his pretty little thigh-highs, little miniskirts, lacey bralettes & maybe even a bit of perfume & some pretty makeup that he is so proud of being able to do.

LOOOOVEEESS having his pretty nipples toyed with as you ride him obviously praising him the entire time, making sure to smother the lipstick he has on onto your own lips before pecking all over his face, leaving physical proof of the kisses you're giving him.

"Look how pretty my mommy is, so cute f'me" you say in a low voice as you're kissing the part of his chest not covered by his pink bralette, your legs holding yourself up on each side of his waist, straddling him.

"so pretty just for you y/nnie" he replies, ears turning bright red & his cheeks blushing a few shades darker than the actual blush he brushed onto his cheeks an hour before.

You do a few playful bites onto his chest, making him whine as he thrusts under you, not moving much because of the weight on top of him. "Can you take off your pretty bra for me, mommy? I wanna see your tits baby" you ask, not making direct eye contact due to wanting to admire the pretty now messed up lipstick fades on his top lip & on the top of his chin.

He nods enthusiastically before sitting up, your chests now pressed together as he unclasps it & throws it aside, instantly lying back down & you following after him & latching onto his right nipple as your hand cups over his muscle, not being able to fully hold it due to the size.

The whines & moans that leave his lips as you do this is better than any music you could ever listen to. You suckle on his nipple as your other hand pinches & lightly pulls on his nipple, making his hand rest on top of it, not wanting your hand to stop its movements for even a second. In the meantime, you can feel his hardon underneath his plaid skirt & matching thong & you would be cruel to not give him even more pleasure despite knowing he could & will orgasm just from nipple stimulation alone.

You pop off his now red, raw & sensitive nipple after forming a small bruise from the suction & look at him to see him already looking down at you, pupils dilated & curly poodle hair now damp with sweat. "You want your pretty pussy played with too, jagi? Take off your pretty panties & give me them & play with yourself for me while I keep myself here, mkay?" you say as you raise your hips the slightest bit & he wastes no time as he shimmys his panties down & puts them into his mouth on instinct, just like what you would want him to do.

You smirk at the action before leaning back down & now taking his other nipple into your mouth as he hisses at the sensation. He picks up his leaky cock into his hand & begins jerking himself off at a fast pace, you both almost being able to hear the wet noises of his shaft due to how much precum is leaking from his tip over the noise of the wet tongue noises of your lips & his loud but muffled whines & groans.

You can feel his legs shaking behind you & you open your eyes, not stopping your actions as you can see drool beginning to soak through the thong in his mouth & his eyes rolling backwards as they go crosseyed. You begin to bite lightly & moan onto his tit & before he can even realise what's going on, cum spurts out of his cock & you feel it spray up your back, soaking staining your shirt.

You pop off his nipple again & smile at him & kiss the tip of his nose as you pull the now soaked panties out of his mouth, listening to his pants as you nuzzle yourself into his neck.

"W-was so good, my precious baby." he whimpers out as he kisses your ear, wrapping his arms around you & gives you a small squeeze, smiling ear to ear, breathing heavily. You just kiss his neck in response.

HYUNJIN: CUM SWAPPING

Anything that's to do with his lover, he is absolutely obsessed with. It's 100% confirmed (by me) that he is such a soft lover especially during sex, but that doesn't mean he isn't messy. He loves having you plaster him in hickies & loves doing it back, he loves leaving small bite marks on the inside of your thighs & you love nothing more than putting lipgloss on just before kissing all up & down his shaft, claiming it as yours.

But up until recently, he thought there was no way to have you both mark each other inside, that was until you both masturbated together while instructing the other on what to do & once you both orgasmed, you both put each others fingers into your mouths to lick them clean, & that is where Hyunjins biggest kink sprung to life.

You're both sitting opposite one another, feet planeted on the bed with your legs outside his, to stop them from closing since they tend to shake when you're close to orgasm.

"Don't put a finger inside yet, hunny, rub your pretty clit instead f'me, alright?? It's so swollen baby, it wants your attention." he hushes out, voice shaky as he is pumping himself at a slow pace, keeping the same pace as you do.

You follow his command but let out a small groan in disapproval at his words but it is short lived as your fingers make contact with your little nub, making you throw your head back & your hips buckle upwards at the contact. You let out a happy sigh before looking back at the gorgeous flustered man in front of you.

"So wet for you Jinnie, cup your balls for me, look so heavy, I want to touch them so badly, baby." you splutter out, eyebrows frowning & he chuckles at your words as he does what you ask & begins tapping his balls with his fingers before cupping them in his hand & using his thumb to roll them in his hand as the other fingers massage them.

"cum for me n then you can feel them, I'll save you some cum i promise, beautiful. Look at how soaked the sheets are hunny, you can put a finger in if you'd like, show me how tight you are jagi." He scrunches his eyes together as another dribble of precum leaks from his red, pretty tip, a low groan leaving his plush lips.

You do as he says & you put two fingers into your dripping hole, a squelch noise leaving the area as you begin feeling around for your G-spot, it being harder to find since your fingers are shorter but you find it after a few seconds. You let out a long whimper as your other hand reaches down to your clit, now receiving double pleasure as your legs begin shaking as you try your hardest to keep your eyes open to watch the man in front of you come undone at the same time as you.

"F-fuck, you're so beautiful y/n, my own piece of moving a-art. Go-gonna cum with you, mkay? Don't wait for me." He whines, voice sounding raspy & breathy as he speeds up his movements.

You both have your eyes glued to one another as you feel your orgasm building up in your lower stomach, legs now feeling fuzzy. "g-g'na cum Jinnie, s-so goo-" you are cut off as your orgasm sprays out of you, coating the bedsheets, your fingers & even a few droplets hitting against Hyunjins cock & that's all it takes for his orgasm to hit him like a truck, cum spurting over his hand as he twitches a bit & back gives out slightly, leaning right into you.

You lay on your back & he follows quickly behind, chests connecting as his cock goes limp against your thigh. Your lips lock together as your tongues poke against the others for a few seconds but you both break it due to lack of breath. You both nuzzle your noses against each other before you move your hand up to his lips & before you even hint towards anything, he puts them in his mouth as he sucks them clean.

You stare at him in awe as he hums around them before allowing you to pull them out. You open your mouth to say something but you are left speechless as he brings his own, cum covered hand, up to his lips & licking a stripe of cum that is across his thumb before tapping your cheek. You don't need to hear what he wants as your lips part & he spits the mix of your fluids into your mouth & you whimper at the taste before swallowing it & sticking your tongue out to show it's all gone.

"Now you're marking me inside too, so poetic." you chuckle & his cheeks go red as he hides his face in your chest as he slides down to lie there. "Don't act as if you don't like that fact." he mumbles back, feeling shy but also extremely turned on.

#skz smut #stray kids #changbin #bang chan #lee know #hyunjin #hyunjin smut #changbin smut #bangchan smut #leeknow smut #skz #seo changbin #oneshot #kpop smut #straykids x reader #straykids hard thoughts #straykids #felix #seungmin #jeongin #han jisung

[httpdwaekki]

worship | s.c.

summary: you don’t feel beautiful but changbin shows you just how beautiful you are.

wc: 4.6k

warning: SMUT 18+ (MDNI), tall!chubby!afab!reader, praise kink, body worship, negative self-talk, unprotected sex (wrap it b4 u tap in), oral (read rec), nipple play, aftercare, tried to keep it as gender neutral as possible but written as afab!reader, probably more, read at your own risk.

a/n: minors and ageless blogs DNI. i will be blocking anyone that interacts with this post that is a minor/ageless blog. okayyyy, this is my first smut and i of course had to write it about my favorite boy <3 let me know what you think! anyway, i hope you enjoy! remember to eat, drink water and take your meds, ily <3

my library

(pictures are not mine! credit to owners!)

you weren’t always the most comfortable in your skin growing up. you were taller, and on the chubbier side for as long as you can remember. it always bothered you, you got treated differently from your skinnier friends.

you got stares not only for your height but your weight, you certainly didn’t get approached by boys and if you did they were trying to use you to get to your friends. you got used to it, you got depressed, and got into a really dark place.

but you slowly realized that if no one was gonna love you for you, then you were going to have to. and that’s what you did, you embraced every roll, every curve, every stretch mark. and you loved yourself like no else has. but then you met one seo changbin.

and if you thought no one could love you more, you were very mistaken. he proved to you everyday how much he loved you, every flaw, every strength, every high, every low. his love was truly unconditional.

and as much as he showed you how much he loved you, you were of course going to have your bad days. days where you don’t feel good about yourself, where you want to hide from the world, where you feel so uncomfortable in your own skin you almost wish you could rip it off.

and that’s exactly how you felt today. you laid on your couch in the biggest shirt you had, with an even bigger blanket around you, swallowing you into a fuzzy cocoon.

you were barely watching what was playing on the tv in front of you when you heard the familiar sound of the lock of your front door clicking, signaling it being unlocked. you know exactly who it was, you didn’t even have to move. you knew he was showing up sooner or later to figure out why you hadn’t been acting like yourself.

he had tried to ask but you shut him down every time. you knew he was busy and you didn’t want to burden him with your issues and especially when you knew the feelings would pass sooner or later.

you hear him lock the door once more before taking his shoes off and setting his bag down. he then makes his way into your living room finding you in your cocoon, long legs curled up as much as they could be. you look up at him, big eyes reflecting the forgotten show on your tv.

your eyes follow him as he makes his way, squatting next to your cocoon. he raises a hand, brushing the soft surface of your chubby cheeks, “hi my baby.” he coos, eyes bright, finally getting to see his favorite person. “hi bin.” you mumble, leaning into his warm touch.

“you wanna tell me what’s been going on, hm?” you feel your face heat up, bringing your hands up to cover your face, inherently halting his movements and touch.

“hey, baby, look at me,” he gently grabs your hands, holding them in his. “what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours, hm?” you shake your head, feeling all of the emotions you’ve been trying to ignore. “baby i can’t help if you don’t talk to me.” thumbs slowly stroking the back of your hands.

“i just don’t feel beautiful right now, bin.” you whisper, shaking your head. “and i know it’s just my brain being mean but fuck bin, it hurts and i don’t want to believe it but it’s so hard when it’s me.” you’re staring at your connected hands, avoiding the eyes of the man in front of you.

he lets go of one of your hands, gently placing it under your chin to lift your eyes to his. “you gotta tell me when you feel like this, okay?” he pauses. “you are the most beautiful, gorgeous person i’ve ever laid my eyes on.” he places a gentle kiss to your hand.

“will you tell me what’s going through your head so i can prove it wrong?” you think about it for a moment, the one person in your life that always makes you feel loved and seen is asking to show you how much he loves you. and who the hell are you to say no.

“i just,” you pause, moving to sit up, crossing your legs in front of you, binnie’s hands laying on top of them. “i hate that my thighs are so big or that my stomach is pudgy or i’m so fucking tall and i just wish that i loved the way i looked because i fucking hate feeling this way.” you must admit, it did feel good to finally get it off your chest, it however didn’t quiet your brain or the negative thoughts that continued to run rampant through them.

“will you let me show you how gorgeous you are?” he asks, rubbing the exposed skin of your calf. you looked into his eyes once more, finding nothing but love and sincerity. you nod your head slightly, before he moved to his knees before you,

he grabs your cheek once more, bringing you closer before placing his lips on yours. he’s placing gentle strokes on your cheek with his thumb, as his lips move against yours. he eventually starts to move further down, kissing the length of your jaw, down to the sweet spot, just below your ear.

he stays there for a moment, interchanging between kissing and sucking the soft skin, pulling light whimpers from you. “look at you, sounding so pretty for me already.” he praises before placing one last kiss, moving to his feet.

he grabs your hand, pulling you from the couch and your warm cocoon. “if i’m gonna show you, i’m gonna do it right.” he says before picking you up with ease, taking you to your bedroom where he lays you on the bed.

“move to the middle, bunny.” he requests, tapping the side of your thigh. you do as he says, laying in the middle before he moves to hover over you. “look at you, my pretty baby.” he kisses your jaw once more, moving down for the second time. this time he starts placing kisses down your clothed sternum.

once he reaches your belly, he lifts your shirt up, just enough, to expose it to him. he starts placing slow, loving kisses over each roll and curve the soft surface has to offer. “you see this gorgeous tummy? so soft just for me. it holds all of the important things your body needs to keep you with me.” he starts, still placing kisses.

“and hopefully will one day carry our mini me into the world.” your eyes soften, hands finding their way into the soft raven curls that lay atop his head. “you’re gonna make me cry.” you mumble, scratching softly at his scalp. “it’s true though.”

he gives your stomach one last kiss before moving your shirt up once more. this time exposing your bare breasts to him. “and these,” he pauses, bringing his hands up to sofft brush the sides. “god these are so fucking perfect jagi.” he places kisses around each nipple, softly brushing his lips against them.

“the perfect pillows, so soft and the noises you make when i touch them?” he takes a nipple into his mouth, gently sucking it, his tongue flicking the peaked bud. you let out a high pitched moan, tighten the grip on his hair slightly, resulting in a satisfied hum from the man above you.

“so fucking pretty baby.” he says before moving the next bud, gently rolling the previous one between his fingers. repeating the same process, you let out another moan, squeezing your thighs together, feeling the wet spot in your panties getting bigger.

he finally releases your nipple placing a kiss to each one before he leans back. “sit up for a second.” you sit up, allowing him to take the shirt off before he moves you to lean comfortably against the pillows. he places a kiss to the side of your mouth before moving to your shoulder, kissing all the way down your arms, until he reaches you hand entwining your fingers.

“and these arms, that hold me with such love and care.” he kisses your other arm. “and take care of me so well, whenever i need it most.” he places a kiss to each shoulder and each hand before positioning himself between your legs. not before gving your tummy a few extra kisses on the way down.

he starts by kissing your panty line, placing a kiss on the now obvious wet spot. you let a soft sigh before looking down, catching a glimpse of the obvious proud smirk on his pretty face. “ and don’t even get me started on these fucking legs.” he sits back on his heels, grabbing one leg, placing a kiss on the inside of your knee.

“so fucking long, and beautiful, god you have no idea what they do to me.” he grabs the other one, placing a kiss in the same place. “now for my favorite part, your beautiful thighs.” kissing up the inside of them, nipping the skin, right next to where you needed him the most.

“look at them baby, so big and beautiful,” he switches to the other side. “and they way they feel wrapped around my head while i’m making you feel good?” his arms coming up to caress the sides of them. “i could stay like that all day jagiya.” he places one last kiss to each one, before bringing a hand up to gently rub the wet spot on your pink panties.

“and my favorite treat, so ready and so fucking pretty for me as always baby.” he places soft kisses to the wet fabric before sitting up, tapping your hip, signaling you to lift them. he quickly slides them off, throwing them some place in the room before moving back between your plush thighs.

he wraps his arms around your hips, pulling you forward a bit, finally settling there. he brings one hand back around to spread you wet lips. “always ready for me, huh bubs?” he lightly blows, making you whine a bit. “i know baby, i know. i just wanted to look at my pretty baby for a little bit.”

he brings his arms back to rest around your soft thighs before placing a kiss to your inner thigh, slowly making his way to your pussy. placing light kisses to your lips before finally placing a kiss to your bundle of nerves. you whimper at the minimal stimulation, “binnie, please.” you beg, looking down to find that same proud smirk on his face.

“my pretty baby feeling needy?” he teases, still lightly pressing kisses to your clit. you nod, pouting, hoping he’ll cave and give you what you want. “okay jagi, i’m sorry.” he gives your clit one last kiss before licking a stripe from your dripping hole, to your sensitive clit.

your back arches slightly, mouth agape, at the feeling of finally getting the stimulation you’ve been waiting for. your hand finds his raven curls once more as he then fully takes your clit in his mouth, alternating between sucking and flicking the sensitive bud.

you moan, lightly scratching his scalp, as he continues his work on your bud. “feels good baby?” he asks, mouth still against you. you nod, another moan leaving your mouth as he gently grazes you clit with his teeth.

you feel a finger rub at your entrance before he fully inserts it, curling it slightly. your hand tightens around his curls for a moment, as a whine leaves your mouth. “more please.” you beg, feeling the knot in your tummy already begin to tighten. “patience baby, i got you.”

he adds a second finger, picking up the pace slightly, causing your legs to tighten around him. the way he’s using your clit and hitting that sweet spot perfectly feels euphoric. “binnie,” you moaned, “i’m close.” you warned, back arching off the mattress, hand tightening in his curls once more.

this only prompts him to quicken his movements, sucking on your clit a little harder. your whimpers and moans get louder and louder as you get closer and closer to your release. “please,” you beg, teetering on the edge of cumming. “binnie, don’t stop, i’m so close.” you whimper, your free hand coming up to play with your peaked bud.

“you gonna cum pretty?” he asks against your clit. you moan a small “mhm” telling him all he needs to know. “so cum baby, let me see how pretty my baby looks when i’m making them feel good.” that sends you over the edge, throwing your head back, thighs tighten around his head, fingers tightening in his hair as you cum.

he works you through your high, taking out his fingers, taking all you have to offer. your fingers release his hair, relaxing back into the mattress as you come down. you whimper as he still flicks your sensitive bud with his tongue. you push his head away softly, feeling slightly overstimulated.

“give me one more pretty.” he says, inserting his fingers once more. “let me make you feel good, baby.” his movements are quicker this time. your noises becoming high pitched as you get closer to your second release.

“binnie!” you cry, legs shaking slightly at the stimulation. he adds a third finger, stretching you even more. “there you go my pretty baby,” he continues his work before speaking again, “looking so beautiful for me.” his mouth back on you, moving with fever to get you to your release once more.

“ah!” you wail. “binnie-“ you cut yourself off with a load moan. “come on gorgeous, let go, show me how beautiful you are.” you’re cumming again, legs shaking, tightening around his head once more. both hands grabbing your boobs as your back arches off the bed.

“there you go, good job baby, did so good.” he says as you finally relax into the mattress once more. your breathing heavily, trying to regain your composure as he pulls out his fingers. he places a slow, soft kiss to your clit before placing one to each of your inner thighs.

he sits up, licking his fingers before hovering over you once more. he kisses you, tasting yourself slightly on his tongue. “so beautiful baby.” he says against your lips. “always sound so pretty when you cum.” he kisses you again. “you look even prettier.” he kisses you once more before leaning back, taking off his shirt, throwing it somewhere in the room.

you take in the beautiful man in front of you, aching once again even after two orgasms. you sit up, leaning forward, pulling him into a feverous kiss, hands finding his pecs, working their way down to his abdomen. you make your way down his neck, finding his own sweet spot, pulling a groan from him.

you whine as he pulls you away, pout present on your swollen lips. “i know jagi but this is about you, not me.” he brings a hand back to your soft cheek, caressing it once more before placing a quick kiss to the other one. “lay back down bunny.”

he gets off the bed as you lay back down against the pillows. you watch as he slides his pants down, stepping out of them, kicking them to the side. he grabs the waistband of his boxers, pulling it down, releasing his hard length, thick and leaking against his soft tummy.

you squeeze your thighs together as he tosses the fabric to the side. he climbs over you once again, this time carefully spreading your legs, leaning down to place a kiss to your inner thighs “so beautiful.” mumbles against your soft skin before placing a gentle kiss to your clit, making you jolt from the contact.

he kisses his way back up you body, sparing extra kisses to your soft tummy, and of course one to each nipple. he kisses up your sternum, up your throat to jaw before he pulls away to look at you. you swear you could see hearts in his eyes as he looked down at you.

“hi pretty.” he whispers, eyes gleaming. his hand was resting on the bed next to your head, the other one rubbing small circles on your plush thighs that laid upon his. “hi bub.” you whisper back, face warm. “how’re you feeling, hm?” you smile at his question, bringing your hand up to rest on his puffy cheek.

“really good jagi, thank you.” he smiles, pressing a deep kiss to your lips. he leans against you, his body pressing against you. you feel his hard length slide between your wet folds, brushing against your bundle of nerves.

you let out a soft moan against his lip, as he pushes your thigh to the side, allowing him more access to your core. his lips never leaving yours as he rubs little circles on your clit. you pull away, letting out a whimper as he continues his movements.

“feel good, jagi?” he asks, capturing your lips once more. you nod against him, your hand coming up to grip his bicep. he pulls away once more, but continues rubbing circles to your sensitive nub.

“you ready my baby?” you nod, another moan falling from your lips. “i gotta hear you say it, bunny.” you whine. “i’m ready binnie, please i need you.” satisfied with your answer he places another kiss to your swollen lips and his lines up to your entrance.

your mouth falls open and he pushes into you, your grip tightening around his bicep. “fuck.” you whisper against his lips. he’s stretching you out in the best way possible. he’s stills once he’s fully in, giving you a moment to adjust.

his hand rests on your hip, softly caressing your skin as you adjust to his size. he’s placing kisses to the side of your mouth, your jaw, your cheek before he places his forehead against yours. “you okay, pretty?” you nod against his forehead.

“i’m so okay, you have no idea.” you giggle, causing him to smile. “i’m gonna move now okay?” you nod once again. “okay.” you confirm, your body relaxing into the mattress below you. he places one last kiss to your lips before sitting up a bit.

he places one hand on your plush thigh while the other grabs your waist. he pulls out just to fully push back in, pulling a moan from you. “fuck bin, oh my god.” your hand once again finding the soft flesh of your chest. “that’s it baby, sound so pretty while i’m making you feel good.”

he’s slowly thrusting into you, drinking in the way your body reacts to him. he picks up the pace slightly, “play with your pretty nipples for me baby.” you do as he says, clenching around him and you play with the hard buds. “fuck bunny, you’re squeezing me so good.” he moans, throwing his head back for a moment.

he looks godly above you, you arch your back at the sight causing him to hit that sweet spot inside of you. you let out a particularly high pitched moan at the feeling, causing him to snap his head back down, catching the sight of you arched infront of him.

he slows down, reaching for an extra pillow that you’re not leaning against. you let out a whine, relaxing your back. “relax jagi, i’m just getting you a pillow.” he pulls out and taps your hip. “lift up for me baby.” you lift your hips and he slides the pillow under you.

“okay bunny, lay back down.” you lay back into the mattress, and he pushes your legs open once more. “my pretty bunny is so obedient.” he leans down, arm next to your head as he kisses you. he rubs your sensitive clit once again, pulling whimper from you.

“just like that, look at this beautiful body. jagi.” he says against your lips, still rubbing little circles on your clit. “so soft and perfect, just for me.” you bring your hands back up, one on your tit the other wrapping around his shoulder.

“binnie please.” you beg, needing to be filled again. “i got you baby don’t worry.” he stops his movements on your clit to line himself once more, slowly pushing in. the new angle making it feel intoxicating as he pushed into you.

“oh fuck, baby, fuck.” you cried, digging your nails into his shoulder. “yeah? that feel good?” he starts thrusting into you. “my baby is making such pretty noises for me.” you’ve lost your train of thought, your mind only filled with binnie and the way he’s making you feel right now.

“oh-, bin-, fuck-“ you couldn’t get a coherent sentence out. truly being fucked dumb by the man above you. “that’s it bunny, just empty that pretty little brain of yours.” he slid his arm under your neck, pressing his body into yours. he brought his other hand to your clit, rubbing small circles as he increased his pace.

“oh god! binnie!” you wail, your legs wrapping around his waist. “wrap those pretty long legs around me bunny, there you go.” he places kisses along your jaw, both your arms wrapped around him, pulling him impossibly closer. one hand finding its way into his hair, as you turn your head into him.

“oh my god.” you groan into his ear, pulling at his hair slightly. “my beautiful baby feels so good for me.” he moans in your ear, causing you to clench around him. he groans, “fuck, you like when i call you my beautiful baby?” you cry out, nodding against him.

“is my pretty bunny about to cum?” your toes curl, feeling that familiar knot tightening in your tummy. “yes, yes, i’m-“ you cut yourself off with a cry, it’s almost too much pleasure, almost. “you’re close jagi i know, fuck.” his breathing getting heavier and heavier letting you know he’s close too.

“can you hold on for me?” you let out a high pitched whine. “i know pretty, just a little longer.” you whine again. “you can’t-“ you cut yourself off, trying to focus on anything but how good his making you feel. “you can’t, tell me to wait-“ you let out a moan, “and then call me pretty- oh fuck.” you feel it getting tighter, seconds away from snapping.

“i can’t, why not pretty? hm, cause my gorgeous baby is about to cum? is that it?” you cry out at his words, his teasing only egging you on. he leans down to your ear, still keeping his pace, hitting your sweet spot and rubbing your clit so deliciously. “so then cum bunny. show me how fucking perfect my jagiya is.” that’s all it takes, you let out a scream, the pleasure overwhelming you.

“fuck!” you tighten your legs around him, as much as you can as they’re shaking, toes curling as your orgasm rips through you. nails digging into his shoulder as you grab onto whatever you can to keep you grounded. “good job pretty, that’s my baby.” he’s fucking you through your high as you feel his hip stutter.

“fuck, bunny.” his thrusts are getting sloppy, knowing he’s close. “give it to me binnie. show me how much you love me.” and with that he’s cumming in your pretty pussy. he gives a few more thrusts before he stills in you, laying on top of you.

you both lay there, catching your breath, coming down from your highs. you’re the first to move, arms still wrapped around him, carding your fingers through his hair, placing kisses on the side of his head. he finally ground’s himself, placing a kiss to your shoulder, before moving to hover over you, your hands falling, landing on the back of his neck.

he looks down at you with nothing but love as he places his hand to your cheek, gently rubbing it. “you are so beautiful, my love.” your face warms once again. “thank you binnie, i love you.” he leans down, capturing your lips in a deep kiss.

“i love you more my perfect jagi.” he says against your lips, causing a smile to spread across them. “i’m gonna pull out now okay? then we’ll get cleaned up and relax.” you nodded, stealing a quick peck before he leaned back, your legs falling onto the mattress as he pulled out. he hissed as he did, pulling a small whimper from you at the emptiness.

he, watches as his cum pours out of you, effectively ruining your sheets but he couldn’t care less. he leans down, kissing each thigh again, placing a soft kiss to your swollen clit, causing you to flinch. then your hips, making his way up, kissing every curve and roll on your soft tummy, giving each nipple their own kiss before finally making it back to your lips.

“my gorgeous, gorgeous bunny.” you smile pulling him closer, wrapping your legs around him once again, deepening the kissing. he pulls back, tapping the side of your ass, “come on, let’s get you cleaned up so you can relax.” he moves off the bed, quickly finding his boxers before pulling them back on.

he turns around to find you sitting on the bed, he picks you up bringing you to your bathroom, setting you on the counter. he turns on the bath, making it nice and warm before plugging the drain and putting your lavender bubble bath in.

walking back over to you, he picks you up once again, setting you on the toilet, placing a kiss to your head, “i’m gonna go change the sheets quick, i’ll be right back.” you nod at him, smiling as he makes his exit, closing the door behind him.

you quickly use the bathroom before stepping into the nice warm bath. he opens the door 10 minutes later, with towels, setting them on the counter before removing his boxers. you move forward as he approaches the tub to give him enough room to sit behind you.

once in the tub he pulls you back to him, wrapping his arms around you, showering you in kisses once more. you grab both hands, entwining his hands with yours, giving each hand a kiss, “thank you, for everything.” you turn your head to look back at him. “you’re the best person i know and i really don’t know what i’d do without you.”

he pulls you into another kiss before you relax against him once more. “you never have to thank me for telling the truth.” he pauses. “all i ask is that you tell me when you’re feeling like this so i can show you just how truly beautiful you are.” you feel a lump in your throat form at the love you feel for the man behind you.

you nod your head. “okay, i promise.” he holds you tighter, hands still connected, placing a kiss to your hair. you both stay like then until the water runs cold, draining it before you both get out, putting on the minimum amount of clothes.

making your way to your bed, with clean sheets, where you both spent the rest of the night in each other’s arms, relaxing. you’re always gonna have bad days but it’s comforting to know you’re favorite person will always be there to help you through it and make it all better.

do not repost

#seo changbin #changbin #changbin fluff #changbin smut #seo changbin smut #changbin imagine #changbin x reader #changbin oneshot #changbin fic #stray kids #stray kids smut #stray kids fluff #stray kids imagine #stray kids fic #ash's archive ⟡˖° #binnie <3

[violetsiren90]

The Light of Your Eyes

Pairing: best friend's younger brother!Changbin x f!Reader

Genre: one-shot; friends to lovers; smut and fluff; hurt/comfort

Summary: Can the gentle touch of an unexpected pair of hands on your body heal the wounds of your soul?

Content warnings: 18+ (minors, dni), age gap romance (consenting adults); mentions of break-up and unhealthy past relationship dynamics; depression and anxiety symptoms (mild); MC has self esteem struggles, some are body-image related; the ex was low-key emotionally abusive tbh 😒; depictions of alcohol consumption (no drunkenness); depictions of food and eating (MC has a moment of negative thought patterns in regards to food consumption); gaming/watching movies; emotional breakdowns; kissing (so much kissing, guys); Fluffy fluffy FLUFF 💕; making out; interrupted shenanigans; cuddling; shirtless Binnie 👀; strong and gentle Binnie 🥺💘 ; working through FEELINGS 😅 ; breast play; nudity; oral sex (f. receiving); feedbag position; confessions and new beginnings.

Word Count: ~9300

Author's Note: Well, here it is - my first Binnie fic! I wanted to make it as sweet and sexy as he is...which, I know, is impossible, so I gave it my best shot! Hopefully, it's something worthy of his face-claim. I'm not going to make any judgements as to whether I feel it fits the bill, but rather like the man himself, tell you to be the judge of your own opinions! Jutdae!! 😂💗 But in all seriousness, if you decide to read this story, thank you! I hope it brings you something warm and fuzzy!

*The poem at the beginning is an original, and is what inspired this story!

Acknowledgements: I cannot thank @moni-logues enough for beta reading this for me, and for all her hype and humor and general human decency - this story wouldn't be what it is without her! 💖

As always, if no one has told you today, please know that you're loved, and worthy of love! 🧜‍♀️💜

    

the

Bright color of my laughter and the

Melody of the curve of my hips and the

Soft velvet of my irises

     seemed

To have taken their first breath,

Opening gently - like flowers perfuming my soul

- When bathed in the light of your eyes.

"Changbin? What are you doing here?"

     "I could ask you the same question," he says with a little smirk, whipping a dish towel over his shoulder as he shuffles back to let you in.

     Fair enough, you suppose. You are showing up without notice. Not that you ever need to give his sister any notice - as your best friend, there's a key with all the others in your purse that unlocks the door you're closing behind you. You wouldn't have even knocked had his car not been parked in the driveway.

     "Where's Nari?" you ask, glancing at the gaming console hooked up to the massive flat-screen, and a bullet blender cup half filled with something thick, pale and probably protein-packed sitting on the coffee table.

     "She went out of town for the weekend," he calls, heading back toward the dining area. "Last minute work thing." 

     Damn. 

     Your apartment is boring and barren and lonely. You wanted to hang out. You've been coming around more than usual – almost as often as when you were in grad school together. But Nari had her own life, you understood. You had your own life too.

     And then three months ago, on New Years Eve, your long-term boyfriend called it quits. It wasn't as if you were heartbroken. Not really. The relationship had been sick and slowly dying. But returning to a life lived in solitude was proving a difficult adjustment – especially navigating the new and constant stillness which left you the mental space and dexterity to run up against the shadows of wounds unhealed. And you didn't feel like growing into your EQ. You felt like distracting yourself. So you ended up at your bestie's place more often than not, these days.

     You sigh, trailing toward the kitchen. You won't stay long - if her younger brother is house sitting, he'll probably have people coming over. It's Friday night, after all, and he's twenty-four years young.

    The sound of running water, and music from a little speaker playing a catchy beat laced with fast-paced rap draws you into the warmly-lit, open kitchen. You recognize the voice on the track.

     "This new?" you ask, dropping your bag on a barstool and rounding the island to where Changbin is up to his elbows in suds at the sink. He's in a black band tee and bright blue joggers, his curly dark hair unstyled.

    He looks over his shoulder and nods.

    "What do you think? Wait, no, lemme start it over..."

     You smile to yourself as he hastily dries his hands and whips out his phone, pulling the track back to the beginning. He braces himself against the edge of the sink, gnawing on his bottom lip as he bobs his head with the lyrical punches and runs. 

     You smile to yourself, leaning your back against the counter beside him.

     "This is good, Bin," you nod earnestly. 

     "Yeah?" he asks, returning to his soapy task.

     "It really is. Hyunjin's pretty damn fast. Not as fast as you, but who is?" 

You grin, bumping your hip into his side.

     He smirks down into the bubbles.

     He's wanted to make music for as long as you've known him, and even fifteen years ago he could spit out a diss track that would have you wetting yourself laughing. He and his buddy, Hyunjin, met in high school and started messing around with music senior year. They committed to the dream, and both worked full-time gigs - Hyunjin as a tattoo artist and Changbin as a personal trainer - while promoting their artistry in their spare time. Production was a tough road to take when they were counting on nothing but raw talent and guts, but you'd always been an unflinching supporter.

     "We've got a gig next Saturday...at The Eight Ball," he remarks, looking over at you as a proud smile presses a tiny dimple into his bread cheek.

     "What?!" you squeal, turning to smack him on the arm. "Dude, that's fantastic! Oh my god, congratulations!"

     "Thanks, and ouch!" he replies, rubbing his arm with a pout that you ignore. It couldn't possibly have hurt him, not with those biceps.

     He moves to the fridge, a grin still plastered on his face.

     "You should come!" he urges over his shoulder as he appraises his sister's stash before grabbing an energy drink. "I know the boyfriend isn't into rap, but you could come with Nari..."

     You scoff softly.

     "Doesn't really matter what he likes anymore," you mumble bitterly.

     Changbin freezes as he's about to crack open the beverage in his hand.

     "Wait, what? Did you guys...is that over?"

     You purse your lips and nod. Changbin looks completely taken off guard in a way that surprises you. 

“When did that happen?”

You reach back to clutch at the cold tile of the countertop.

“Beginning of the year.”

He scratches his head.

“Nari didn’t…why didn’t you say something?”

You shrug, your eyes falling. For reasons you'd never considered, you’d rarely brought your ex around or even brought him up to Changbin. 

He turns to the still open fridge and swaps out his energy drink for two beers, opening both and sliding one across the island between you.

     "How you holding up?" he asks in earnest concern, a little furrow appearing between his dark brows.

     You want to tell him that you're fine - it's what you've been telling everyone else - but from the way he holds your gaze before letting his eyes search your face, he's looking for a real answer. You pull your lip between your teeth. You're not ready to form the words that spell the truth. He sees it.

    "Ah," he waves dismissively, "Fuck that guy. You're too good for him anyway. What an idiot."

      You blink, a little smirk tugging at your lips.

     "You don't have to hate on him just because we're-"

     "I'm hating on him because I hate him," he stares at you unflinchingly, taking another swig of his beer. "He wasn't good to you, didn't make you happy. I'm glad he's gone. Seriously, fuck him."

     You didn't expect that sort of reaction out of Changbin. Not that you expected anything, but the strong, certain tone he took in regards to your ex's unworthiness has a tiny little warmth glowing in your chest. It was like him to feel strongly and take a stand, but to have his conviction aimed at you...

     "Thanks, Bin," you murmur softly, hiding your smile behind your beer.

     The young man nods, and his lips part as if to speak when his phone buzzes in his pocket. As he answers the call - clearly, from the nature of his greeting, one of his buddies - you're reminded that you’re trespassing on his Friday night. Draining your beer, you grab your bag and slip out of the kitchen. 

     You huff a little sigh as you pull on your shoes, lingering listlessly for a moment before pulling open the door. The thought of going home has your stomach churning. You can't go back and be alone there. 

You can't.

     You have to.

     How pathetic could you possibly get? you consider sickly, staring out into the darkness. Your self-loathing and mounting anxiety battle for dominance as you will yourself to take the step over the threshold that will carry you to your car…

     Click.

     The door swishes shut, and you blink in confusion before you note a bulky arm stretched over your shoulder, hand pressed to the wooden frame below the peephole.

     You turn into Changbin's frame and he jostles backwards, hand dropping to your shoulder.

     "Where do you think you're going?" he asks, a little smirk playing on his lips.

     You try to get your bearings as you resurface from the flash flood of inner turmoil, blinking up at him in confusion.

     "Uuhh...home?" you answer, jerking a thumb back toward your intended exit.

     Changbin shakes his head. 

     "You just got here."

     "Well...I came to see Nari but she's gone, so..." 

     When the faintest shadow of hurt seems to flicker over his features at your words, you stammer to clarify.

     "Bin, it's Friday, I- you've got plans, right? I don't want to be in the way...Like, it's really nice seeing you don't get me wrong, but, it would suck to have one of your sister's random friends underfoot if you're...if..."

     You trail off. He's watching you in amusement now, arms crossed and bottom lip pulled between his teeth, one eyebrow cocked just a little higher than the other.

     "What?" you press him, now a bit self-conscious at your rambling and still on edge from the surging anxiety of moments ago. 

     Damn, what was with you? You'd been a mess lately, and now you couldn't even get your words out with Nari's kid brother?

     "I do have plans."

     Changbin's words interrupt your muddled self-assessment. You glance up at him.

     What? Okay, that's what you had been trying to...

     "I plan to kick your ass at Super Smash Bros Brawl," he quips, turning to round the couch and settle in front of it before reaching for the blue controller discarded on the coffee table.

     Huh?

     You watch him start up the game and move through selections. Shuffling toward the back of the couch, you place your hands on it. He wants to hang out? Now that he found out you'd been dumped. Nari's away, so he's falling into stride, you think to yourself. You sigh. You should be grateful. Instead, you feel like a burden.

     "Um, Bin..." you murmur, "You don't have to do this..."

     "Do what?" he asks without looking back. "I'm not going easy on you, if that's what you mean. And I'm using Kirby - nonnegotiable."

     Your heart melts a little as your eyes rest on him. He's always been a good guy, and it was like him to do this sort of thing - look out for someone when they were feeling low. Leaving simply because you don't feel worthy of his care and attention risks hurting him more than you.

     You slowly slip out of your shoes and cross into the living room, retrieving a red controller from atop the console before sinking onto the carpet beside him. You toggle through your choices before landing on Link. Changbin glances over at you disparagingly. 

     "Link sucks."

     "Kirby sucks."

     "Hey!" Changbin, practically shouts in your ear, "Don't insult my widdle cutie guy..."

     You grimace theatrically at the baby talk.

     "Don't ever do that again."

     "Or what?" Changbin challenges as he immediately unleashes a combo move that has your character hurtling toward the edge of the battle stage.

     You hop around, avoiding him and trying out different button combos. It's been forever since you played this game. Your ex had been a Halo enthusiast. You were never big on first person shooters, but you tried to get into it for his sake. He hadn't the patience to help you learn, though, and after a couple of sessions of grimaces and apologies on your behalf mumbled into his headset, he'd stopped taking you up on your offers to join him. 

     Kirby darts back and forth across the screen after you on stubby pink legs. Eventually you get the hang of things and are returning his attacks, though he easily bests you in an embarrassingly short sequence of moves.

     "Sorry, I'm no good at video games," you mumble apologetically. 

     The smug look falls from Changbin's face.

     "Why are you sorry?" he raises a brow, dropping his controller into his lap, a little smile still playing on his lips.

     You shrug. His smile fades.

     "Who says you're no good?"

     Shit.

     You shift your focus to the screen and toggle for a new character.

     "Best two out of three."

     You can feel his eyes still on you as you opt for Princess Peach.  

     Two out of three turns into five out of eight, and around eleven out of twenty, the doorbell rings. When Changbin turns in surprise toward the sound, you take the opportunity to deliver a critical blow, winning your first match of the night. He rolls his eyes as you giggle wickedly and moves to answer the door.

     You pull your phone from your pocket reflexively to check the socials you've deleted, before sighing and tossing it across the room to land on the carpet with a thud.

     "Did you just throw your phone?" 

     Glancing over your shoulder, you catch him shooting you a quizzical look over a stack of pizza boxes tall enough to feed a small army. Clambering to your feet you trail after him into the kitchen.

     "You do have plans, you liar!" you elbow him as he opens the top box and pulls out a slice, hissing as the melted cheesy overflow burns the tips of his fingers.

     "Ow!" he snaps up a napkin and cradles it under the steaming piece of pizza, shaking his other hand before holding up his fingers in front of you.

     "Blow on 'em," he whines.

     You raise your eyebrows.

     "You're joking."

     He pouts and you want to laugh. This big, grown man is seriously going to give you the lip right now?

     "That's what you get for having no patience, Bin..." you tsk disapprovingly. 

     He lets out a little disappointed sigh.

     "Meanie..." he grumbles, and lets his hand fall.

     You return your focus to the obscene amount of food now stacked on Nari's kitchen table. 

     "So, I'm sure people are going to start showing up, so I'm just gonna..."

     Changbin hands you a paper plate with two slices of pizza and heads to the fridge where he fishes out two more beers. You stare at the plate in your hand.

     "I...Bin..." 

     "What, you don't like sweet potato?" he asks with a smirk, cracking open a can and handing it to you. 

     You blink at him in confusion. 

     "Please enjoy this meal compliments of Han Jisung, who never remembers to update the address on his delivery app. Now, load up on pizza and let’s get back to it because I'm not trying to let you act like you came out on top from winning that last match on a fluke."

     You scoff at his last remark. Watching him pile several slices onto his plate, you take a bite of yours. It tastes good, and you realize as it hits your stomach that you haven't eaten all day. When was the last time you ate a real meal? When was the last time you wanted one? 

     "Noona?" 

     Changbin's voice makes you realize you had zoned out and when you blink up at him, there's just nine inches of disposable dinnerware between you. His lips are pursed and his eyes trace your features, their gaze gentle but searching. 

    "You alright?" he asks.

     There it is again; the concern. He isn't just checking in. His voice is soft and low, like his eyes. As a rule, Changbin's voice is strong, resonant - saying everything from his chest without even trying. So when he's gentle, when he pulls himself back...

    "Do you miss that guy?" he murmurs.

     "No!" 

You say it so quickly.

     Changbin nods.

     "I'm just..." Fuck, why are you suddenly so emotional? "I think I'm...adjusting. Y'know?"

     He nods again slowly. Then he reaches up and touches your face, dragging his thumb over the side of your mouth and suddenly your brain waves flat-line. Your eyes widen and your lips part, but before you can even process what's happening, he drops his hand to swipe it on a napkin.

     "Had sauce on your face," he mumbles, and you can't read his.

     His mouth is tugged up in a small smile but somehow it looks sad, and his eyes look like they're still asking a question that was never really answered. Before you can consider any further, he picks up his plate and heads back toward the living room.

     You follow him, still half in your head.

     When you sit down next to him, there's something hanging unspoken in the foot and a half of space between your bodies. Something has shifted, gone taut. 

     Shit, had you made him uncomfortable? Why had you stared at him like a weirdo when he...wait, he touched you...

     Your eyes shift over to where he sits beside you. He runs a hand through the wavy hair over his ear. Has he always been so beautiful? He turns quick enough to catch you staring and you put your plate out of your lap. The pizza smells so good but suddenly you can't touch it.

     Changbin initiates another round, which you lose in record time. Your stomach grumbles.

     "You better eat if you're going to have any hope of beating me again," he goads, finishing off his third slice to abandon the crust with the others on his plate before launching another game.

     "I had enough," you deflect, pushing your plate toward him.

     "You took two bites."

     "I need to cut back."

     "Like...go on a diet?"

     "Yeah."

     His brows furrow and his tongue slips between his lips as he sends Kirby into a hammer flip that lands as a critical hit and you wince.

"What have you eaten today?"

"What?"

     "You heard me."

     "I...I don't know. I..."

     Your stomach twists. The hunger is there, but so is the anxiety. The fear of being judged for eating too much or too quickly or...

     The game pauses. Your plate slides back toward you over the carpet.

     "The rest of that piece. Or whatever else you want. But something." 

     His voice is gentle but firm. You sigh.

     "Fine," you murmur, grabbing the half-eaten slice.

     You take a bite, and slowly raise your eyes to his as they regard you patiently.

     "Sorry," you mumble, covering your mouth, shifting away from him.

     "Why now?"

     "I make gross noises when I eat."

     "What? No you d-" 

     A hand tugs at your elbow. When you look back toward him his handsome face holds so many things, and you watch as they take turns seizing his features. Horror...pity...anger.

     "Who told you that?" he asks lowly, but it doesn't sound like a question. "Noona..."

     He squeezes your elbow.

     You feel everything you've been shoving down in your chest begin to well up. 

Fuck, no! 

Your lip trembles.

He's shifting to face you.

You shake your head and press your eyes shut.

Your hand is encompassed in a larger one.

     "It's lies, all of it," Changbin whispers with desperate conviction...and your dam breaks.

     He pulls you into his arms as you sob with abandon. One of his hands encircles your waist tugging you against his broad, warm chest, and the other slips to brush tenderly over your nape as you tuck your face into his neck. 

     "He's a liar...shhhh...he's a lying piece of shit," he insists earnestly, into your hair. "You're perfect. He's the one who needs to fix himself. You're so, so perfect." 

     Perfect? You let your heart hold the word in its palm for one precious moment before pushing it away. Your heart had never been one to accept gifts it didn't think it deserved.

     You weep and weep in his strong arms until you run out of tears, and then he holds you while you breathe. As the catharsis of your breakdown begins to settle in, you wonder at the comedown - a softer, warmer one than you've ever known – and you consider the loveliness that has broken your fall.

     Soft and firm, everywhere he touches you. And warm. So warm. Not just the heat radiating from his body like a furnace – the velvet rasp of his voice, the absolute and unfaltering nature of his embrace.

     Your hands move tentatively against his back. Soft cotton stretches and bunches between your fingers over his sturdy frame. Where your face is pressed to his collar every breath draws in a comforting combination of detergent and cologne. When you close your eyes and sigh, letting your weight sink against him further, you feel his arms tighten in response. 

     "Sorry," you croak feebly.

     "Stop," he implores you, "Every time you apologize, I want to sock that guy in the face."

     "I...I'm so stupid, I didn't even really realize..."

     "No," his arms squeeze you again, "He had your trust. It was his job to protect you."

     Protected. That's how you feel right now. Safe. So, so safe. Letting him hold you and reassure you felt good...it felt right. But yet again, the voice in your mind that liked to remind you how much of a burden you always were speaks up in a sickly whisper.

     You pull yourself slowly from his arms and off his lap. Drawing yourself up to stand, you wipe your hot cheeks, puffy red eyes finding his like the needle of a compass. Unprepared for what awaits you in his gaze, your knees nearly give out beneath you.

     Changbin is looking up from where he kneels before you, the yearning in his eyes unchecked as they burn with  an unasked question and an unspoken promise.

     "I should go," you whisper, barely able to form the words.

     "Don't," he says, standing.

     "If I stay I'll just wreck your night," you mumble.

     "You could never," he insists, lips tugging into a little smile. His eyes are still pleading.

     "Changbin..." you breathe, suddenly drowning again in the fizzy serotonin his words ignite in your chest. "You don't want..."

     "You let me be the judge of what I want."

     His hands find your arms and he pulls you in. There are centimeters between you. His eyes rest on your lips. Your heart hammers in your ears as your brain begins to malfunction the way it had when he touched your face...

     "D-do I have something on my-"

     Mouth? His.

    The whole of your being floods with something beautiful and ineffable at the touch of his lips and no voice, no doubt, no force in the world could be stronger than the one that pulls you into him. Your arms fly up to wrap around his neck and tug yourself impossibly closer. His hands drop to your waist, pressing desperately in kind, and your bodies mold together. You flush with heat, sparks igniting in your belly and skittering through your veins as his lips move against yours. He stumbles back, pulling you with him as his knees buckle at the edge of the couch, and your body spills over his lap.

Your fingers card into his hair.

His hands drop to the back of your hips.

Your tongue brushes his bottom lip.

He moans.

     At the gorgeous, deep sound from his chest, you pull back, fighting the smile that pulls at the corners of your mouth. What the fuck is happening right now? You don't get much time to consider as his head falls against the backrest and his eyes flutter open.

     "Sorry," he grins bashfully. The tips of his ears burn pink.

     "Now who's apologizing for no reason?" you tease, pressing your hands to his chest.

     He smiles so sweetly in return you feel you might physically melt. And then the smile fades and the lids of his eyes grow heavy and he leans up to claim your mouth.

     His lips taste the same as a moment ago, but their press is slower, hungrier. His hands are powerful and assertive as they hook under your thighs and pull your hips flush against his own in a single tug. You gasp softly against his lips and you feel his smirk. You feel his smirk and something else - something beginning to press up into your ass through your jeans.

     Licking into his mouth, you push down, grinding your hips over his in a slow, deliberate undulation. The groan that falls from his lips unlocks something inside of you that needs to know every sound he makes and how to elicit them. Your mouth drops to his neck.

     Suddenly, he's gripping your waist and pivoting to lay you on the cushions, slotting himself between your legs. You're still dizzy from the sudden rush of movement, when your legs curl around his hips and over his ass and–

     A loud buzzing from the coffee table has you mourning the press of Changbin's lips to your throat as he glances at the caller ID. 

     "Shit!" he scrambles to sit up, hand still gripping your thigh above your knee when he presses the phone to his ear.

     "Hey," he runs a hand through his hair. "What? Nothing. No, I didn't forget. I will, I will."

     You recognize his tone of voice. There could only be one person on the other end of the line. You sit up, your head beginning to clear as the reality of the situation washes over you.

     "Okay, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Be safe. Love you." 

Changbin presses the end-call button and tosses the phone onto the cushion beside him. He leans back against the couch and claps his hand against your leg with a sigh.

     "She really knows how to wreck a moment for me."

     You crack a wry smile.

     "I mean, it's probably for the best that we don't desecrate your sister's couch."

     His eyes widen as horror, disgust, and amusement wage war across his features. You burst into a fit of giggles. He feigns a gag. You laugh so hard that you snort.

     "S-sorry," you clap your hand over your mouth, still tittering while your ears heat in embarrassment.

     Changbin's face softens again. He reaches for your hand and pulls it from your face, threading his fingers through yours.

     "Cut it out."

     "What? I can't be embarrassed about snorting like a pig?"

     "No. It's cute," he smirks.

     "It is not!"

     "Mhm. Everything you do is cute."

     He glances over at you, a lopsided smirk on his perfect lips, his eyes sparkling. He means it.

     You fluster, gaze dropping to your enjoined hands, and concentrate on tracing little patterns on the back of his with your thumb. He sighs.

     "Wanna watch a movie?"

     The request takes you by surprise and your heart squeezes. If it was any other guy, the night would have been over. For the fourth time tonight, you had been about to head for the door, and for the fourth time, Changbin makes you feel wanted. So you stay.

     You grab a big, fluffy blanket from the basket in Nari's room, and when you return, Changbin has the lights dimmed and Your Name ready to go on the TV. You smile as you settle in beside him, tossing half the blanket over his widespread legs.

     "We don't have to watch this just because it's my favorite, you know," you insist, but he shakes his head.

     "Taki's ma' boy," he smirks, shooting you a glance as he presses play on the remote.

     You're not quite sure what it means, but you feel your heart skip a beat just the same.

You love this movie. You love that you've seen it enough times that you can talk through it. You love that Changbin is more than willing to talk over the film himself. You're not certain when it happened, but by halfway through the movie his arm is stretched out behind your shoulders and your head rests on his bicep.

     "Do you remember seeing this together in the theater?" he asks suddenly, tilting his head toward yours.

     You grin.

     "You cried and Nari gave you shit about it," you recall.

     "You bailed me out. Told her all the sniffling was you. Never even teased me about it either."

     Changbin smiles down at you, his eyes sentimental.

     Butterflies flutter their delicate wings in your ribcage. How does he make you feel this way?

Your eyes dip to his lips for a moment. Sighing, you nuzzle into his shoulder, hiding your face as much as seeking his warmth. His arm slips off the back of the couch to curl around your shoulders and pull you into his side. The movie plays on.

     When the credits roll, Changbin stretches and yawns, and watching him it dawns on you that, working at a fitness center, he's an especially early riser.

     "We should call it a night," you offer, standing and stretching yourself, but you're tugged back down into Changbin's lap, yelping as you topple onto him.

     His arms encircle your hips as he regards you with a sleepy grin.

     "What, do I live here now?" you tease.

     "Stay the night," he urges, tightening his arms around you. "You really want to drive back now?"

     You chew your lip, eyes tracing over his face. This is all more than a bit unreal, and you haven't given yourself even one second to process what's happening, lest you utterly panic. All you know right now is that your little ship had been sinking and he had hauled you into a lifeboat. Everything outside of him seems like a raging sea.

     You nod.

     "Okay," you whisper, combing his hair away from his forehead. “I’ll stay.” 

     His eyes dip shut at your touch and the butterflies flutter gently once more.

     A few minutes later, you take Nari's room and slip into a pair of her cotton shorts, which do basically nothing to contain your ass, and tug on a plain white tee that stretches snugly over your torso. How a big guy like Changbin could have emerged from the same genetic pool as his teeny tiny sister was beyond you. As you glance in the mirror, your heart sinks. You don't like how the tight fit is pressing you out everywhere you're most self-conscious. But, they are just pajamas, and they're all you have at your disposal.

     As you're about to head into the master bathroom to finish your nightly routine, you remember that the toothbrush and toiletries you keep on hand at Nari's are in the little half-bath attached to the guest room. You groan, glancing at yourself again in the mirror, and pull a blanket around yourself before crossing the hall.

     Hoping Changbin hasn’t yet fallen asleep, you knock hesitantly on the door. You hear the bed creak before the door opens to reveal a head of mussed hair and hands scrubbing over bleary eyes. But it's not what you notice. Your apology for rousing him dies on your lips as your eyes glue themselves to his bare chest. Blinking dumbly, your eyes climb from his soft stomach subtly rippling with the presence of strong abdominals up to a pair of impressive pecs with wide-set, dusky nipples. His flannel pajama pants settle at his hips, accentuating how his body broadens as it rises from his waist to his full chest and wide shoulders flanked by bulging biceps. Thick. He's so fucking thick you could bi-

     "...Noona?" he rumbles, his voice husky from sleep. "What's wrong?"

     "Nothing...sorry..." you rush out, ripping your gaze up to his. "My toothbrush is in your room – I mean! in your bathroom. That's where I usually stay, so...but I didn't think you'd be asleep. Sorry, I can just..." 

     He rubs over one of his eyes with his palm as he steps aside.

     "You can grab it."

     Right. You shuffle in awkwardly, trying not to step on the blanket dragging around your feet. As you cross the dark room, you try not to dwell on the rumpled sheets of the bed that speak of his body having lain between them, or the soft smell of his cologne hanging in the air. You quickly retrieve the little toiletry bag and, as you move to squeeze past Changbin at the door, he eyes the fluffy shroud you're clutching to your chest.

     He raises a sleepy eyebrow.

     "I'm sure Nari has pants you could..."

     "I'm wearing pants!" you bluster, "They just...don't fit."

      You move out of the doorway to make your way back to your room, but a hand cups the side of your face and turns it as soft lips meet your forehead. 

     "Good night, noona," he murmurs with a little smile before retreating back into his room.

     You stand in the hall, staring at his door, the butterflies absolutely aflurry.

     Despite your best efforts, you can't sleep. Your mind is full of the last five hours. Full of Changbin.

     He had kissed you. You had kissed him back. And it had felt...

     You roll from your side to your back, sighing up at the dark ceiling. You chew on your lip as you remember breaking down and his arms around you. You would usually feel regretful and ashamed after baring yourself like that to someone. You despised moments of weakness. But you couldn't bring yourself to hate the moments in his arms. You didn't regret them. In fact, you wanted him to hold you again. You wanted to feel vulnerable in his hands, and you wanted him to keep you safe.

     You feel heat rush up from your neck as you recognize these feelings.

     You must be absolutely shameless, you conclude in wonder. You should be freaking out right now - this was Changbin, for Christ's sake – Nari's brother! You should be wondering what happens next, and what all of it means...but even so you can’t bring yourself to care. All your mind can focus on is how his arms felt like waking up after a nightmare to song birds and soft sunlight.

     After an hour or so of tossing and turning, the salty pizza from dinner has you parched and slipping out to the kitchen for a drink. You pull a glass from the cupboard and fill it at the fridge, gulping down the contents to refill it again. Suddenly, you feel two strong arms snake around your waist and you start, sloshing your water and smacking the back of your head into the man holding you. You hastily set your glass down and turn in his arms as he lets out a groan, one of his hands releasing you as it flies up to cup the front of his face in pain.

     "Bin, oh my god! Are you okay? You scared me!" you chide with a chuckle as you reach up to push his hand away and brush the tips of your fingers across his nose. 

    He pouts down at you and you smile.

     "Did I wake you?"

     He huffs.

     "Yeah. To get your toothbrush. Then I couldn't go back to sleep."

     "Sorry," you groan, still stroking over where you had struck his face. "Does it hurt?" 

     He nods.

     "Kiss it better," he mumbles cutely.

     You roll your eyes, but lift your lips to comply when suddenly he interrupts the motion with the soft press of his mouth to yours. It's slow and sweet, and you're struck all over again with how quickly you melt at his touch - a sensation you cannot imagine ever growing accustomed to, but to which you are fairly certain you are in danger of growing entirely addicted.

     "Bin..." you whisper against his lips, "Bin, what are we-"

     "Liar," he murmurs, pulling back.

     Your mouth parts in confusion as you stare up at him, still drunk on his lips.

     "You said the clothes didn't fit. You should wear this all the time," he smirks as he squeezes low on your waist.

     Your cheeks heat as you remember what you're wearing, but you don't have long to be anxious over it as he presses his lips to your nose...the corner of your mouth...your jaw. You tremble as you lean into him, fingers splaying over his warm, bare chest.

     "Let me show you," he whispers against your skin.

     "Sh-show me...what...?"

     He draws back, pressing his forehead to yours.

     "How perfect you are."

     You still, eyes flicking up to his. They're dark and tender and pleading. You let out a little shuddering breath.

     "I...you don't have t-"

     His arms hold you closer, gentle but insistent.

     "Let me," he whispers, the tip of his handsome nose brushing over the dip of your cupid's bow. "Please. I want to."

     You swallow, eyes dropping to his lips. You want it too, you find. You want his hands and lips and eyes all over you, bringing warmth everywhere they meet your aching body. You nod and take his lips again with yours. 

     "Yeah?" he murmurs against them.

     "Yeah," you breathe, slipping a hand up the back of his neck and into his hair.

     He groans in response, deepening the kiss as he licks at your parted lips and when your tongues brush, sparks burst in your belly. You feel it all slipping, the masks, the walls - every barrier you hold up to shield yourself from not being enough. His arms are strong and his lips are tender and you can't focus on anything but the perfection of being so utterly held.

     His mouth moves to caress your jaw, under your ear, down the column of your neck, and suddenly you feel the edge of the counter pressing into the small of your back. His hands grip your waist and he hitches you onto the tiled surface with ease. It's cold against your bare legs, but you don't have more than a second to register the discomfort as Changbin nudges his way between your knees. He runs his hands over your thighs as his eyes trail from your panting lips to your lightly heaving chest.

     You feel your nipples pebble under his gaze and a smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth, his eyes glinting with mischief as he runs a hand up your side, over your shirt, to rest under the swell of your breast. He flicks a thumb over the hardened bud and you whimper and jump. He laughs softly, his smirk spreading into a full smile as he squeezes your breast and brings his eyes to yours.

     "Your pretty body likes me, noona," he puffs proudly, massaging you deftly through the soft cotton of the tee.

     You don't have a witty retort. Your body likes him so much that it frightens you. And with the deep affection you already feel, have long felt, for him...

     You reach to gently tangle your hand again in his coarse, dark curls. He glances up, a sweet little smirk tugging at his pretty lips again. 

     "Bin..." you sigh.

     "Hmm?" he hums as he slips his hands to your bottom and tugs you forward so that you're flush against him.

     You dip your head and your lips ghost his.

     "Nothing," you whisper, and you kiss him again. Again and again.

     His hands slide from your ass to slip beneath your shirt at your lower waist and he kneads the soft flesh above your hips.

     "So soft. Feels so good," he groans into your mouth.

     You moan as the walls of your pussy contract. You're beginning to ache, beginning to drip – and his words seem to affect you as intensely as his touch.

     He moves his lips to latch onto the soft skin of your neck and suck, his hands bunching your shirt up and up until his mouth pops free from your skin and he's pulling the thin garment over your head and tossing it aside. The cool air pricks your skin and you become keenly aware, for the briefest moment, that you are sitting on your best friend's kitchen counter, stripped down to her sleep shorts, with her brother between your thighs. As your brain races to decide whether to find that incredibly arousing or absolutely panic-inducing, Changbin's cherry lips rewire your neurological pathways in favor of the former when they close around your right nipple. Your head lolls back, colliding with the cabinet door and it clatters. 

     "Shit..." you hiss softly, threading your hands into his hair and gripping it by the roots.

     Your eyes slip shut and you focus on the sensation of his warm tongue slipping over the peaks of your breasts, his strong, smooth palms cupping and caressing. And then you feel his little puffs of breath and the nudge of his nose at the valley of your chest as he groans and smushes your tits up to meet his face. 

     "I fucking live here now," he mumbles into the globe of your breast, and despite the heat of the moment, you softly laugh. You laugh and you feel his smile pressed to your skin.

     Then suddenly he's pulling you into his arms in a bridal carry. You know he's strong, as you wrap your arms around his neck, but can't push away a pang of self-consciousness as he bears your weight. 

     "Bin, I'm so heavy..."

     "You're not."

     "I don't want you to..."

     "Stop it," comes his voice in a soft, deep command as he halts in his tracks to kiss you.

     He kisses you and kisses you until you believe that he could carry you until the end of time, and then he takes you into the guest bedroom and sits you gently on the bed. The bed with the mussed sheets that smell like him. The sheets that he's leaning you into as you push yourself to the middle of the bed while he hovers over the top of your body, his lips never leaving yours.

     As he sinks down over you, the weight of his body pressing you into the mattress has warmth licking through your veins. You move your hands to caress over his broad back, feeling his muscles ripple beneath your fingers as he shifts to prop himself up on his elbow. You use the free space to trace your hand down his chest and abdomen until you reach the waistband of his pants. If he'd just push himself a few inches up you could...

     He pulls away, just barely breathless, and his eyes find yours. He reaches down with his right hand to pull yours gently from between your bodies and to his lips, before threading his fingers through yours and pressing your joined hands into the sheets beside your head.

     "I want to eat you out."

     He says it so simply, so confidently, and you can feel more arousal gush to join what's already begun to paint your inner thighs. 

     "Fuck..." you breathe, your fingers trembling in his grasp.

     "Can I?" he asks, kissing your lips softly again.

     For a moment you're afraid of what saying yes will mean, of the intimacy of it all, of the possibility that you won't measure up, someway, somehow, or maybe...that you will - and what in the world you would do with that level of acceptance...

     You let out a shaky sigh, as you hold his gaze. It arrests you and washes over you. You remember his eyes as he knelt on the living room floor, and all they pleaded with you to disbelieve, to unlearn. 

     Yes. Yes...If it's him, you want it, whatever it means.

     You surge forward, pressing your lips to his, your hands weaving through his hair, pulling him in. He lets out a tiny whimper as you devour him, kissing him with determined abandon until you have to come up for air.

     "Yes, Bin, yes," you shudder into his mouth as he pants over you. “Yes I want you to.”

In answer, he presses one last tender kiss to your lips before moving to kiss down your body. He moves slowly, but with purpose, pressing an adoring mouth to every part of you that’s bared. He kisses your ear, your neck, your collarbones…he moves over your shoulders and down your right arm to the tip of each finger. He kisses your breasts and down your stomach. He kisses your belly button, and over your hips and down your left thigh. He kisses the inside of your knee, and bends your leg to kiss over your calf and down to your ankle. 

You can barely watch him, as he brushes his lips over you, but he flicks his eyes up to yours so often you don’t dare look away. There is something flickering in his gaze, something like a challenge - daring you to contradict, to doubt what he seeks to impress upon you - and you begin to feel something strange and new. Something you’d never found at the touch of a lover, blooming in your chest and unfurling like a proud little flower under the sun: the strong, heady beauty of esteeming yourself worthy of his desire. It terrifies you a bit, and the ugly voice that has heckled you so often tries to cast doubt, but Changbin’s lips and hands are too persistent and assured for the harbinger in your mind to linger long. And the tidal wave of lovely feelings crashing over you threatens to destroy the shabby prison your heart has lingered in for so long.

Changbin lays his head on your thigh as he brings his hand off the other to cup your pussy over the softness of your shorts. His groan is nearly as loud as yours when he rubs over your mound, and it makes you impossibly wetter. He’s so unabashed and liberal with reacting to what he enjoys, and he is clearly enjoying you as much as he ever has anything.

He moves to bring his face to your clothed cunt, hovering over you for a nanosecond to catch your eyes as he mouths down over you. Your jaw drops open, and when his teeth scrape dully over your clit, your hips jerk and you fist the sheets. Changbin pulls back with a smirk, and sits back on his knees between your legs. He pulls one of your legs up to lean against his shoulder as his hands instinctively knead over the muscles of your calf and thigh.

“Do you trust me?” he asks, with a little smile.

You nod with one of your own.

“I’m gonna lift you, okay? You can hold onto my legs, but I’ll have you, so don’t worry.”

You bite your lip and nod, suddenly a little shy. Look at him. Where did he get all this confidence?

He drops your leg briefly to tug off your shorts and panties, cursing at how wet you are, and gently slipping two fingers to brush between your glistening lips and over your clit. You gasp at the sensation - his fingers deft, his touch soft but firm where you ache for him. And then, suddenly, he is sliding your legs back up to rest against his chest and shoulders. His hands slip down to your hips and he effortlessly tugs your ass over the incline of his thighs and flush with his abdomen. Your heart starts to thrum in your chest. His body is warm and sturdy against the soft plush of your ass. Heat floods your cheeks when you sense a slickness against him where your arousal has begun to smear against his stomach. He, however, is far less bashful. Widening the gap between your thighs, he dips his head down, inhaling deeply.

"Fuck…" he murmurs, squeezing your legs where he holds them. 

When he raises his eyes to yours again, they’re unlike you’ve ever seen. They’re dark and hungry and hooded in a way that nearly intimidates you. His expression is full of heat, and manly in its sudden gravity. He watches you as he slips his thumbs under your waist and, slowly with strong hands, pulls your hips up beneath his chin. Your legs bend at the knees and drape around the crown of his head. Your spine curves where your upper back is flush with his thighs, your arm on either side of his kneeling form, and as he embraces you tightly around the hips and waist, you feel nearly every ounce of your weight suspended in his hold. The blood rushes to your head where it lays against the mattress, your neck curving just shy of his knees, offering a clear view of his gorgeous face as he wastes no time in pressing his open mouth to your labia. 

Your core muscles flex in response, hips pressing higher against him as you feel ripples of exquisite pleasure trickle through your body from above. The smooth muscle of his tongue slips past your entrance and begins fucking into you. Your head swims, the slightest dizzying restriction of oxygen dampening your ability to focus on anything but the bliss of his hot, wet mouth. Being tasted has never felt this intense. You whimper, your hands reaching around his body to find purchase on his muscular ass. You feel the press of his throbbing erection into your back as his tongue fucks unhurriedly into you. He’s rock hard, and all for you. From the sight of your naked body, the feel of you in his hands, the taste of you on his tongue. From the sounds pouring off of your lips as he worships your sex. 

Your legs begin to shake. You’re so totally in his hands. He holds you, lavishes you, consumes you. Nothing stands between you and ecstasy, and you can feel your climax fast approaching as pleasure ebbs and flows like a crashing tide on the rhythm of his firm, languid strokes.

"Ch-Changbin! Nhhh!" you mewl, you voice throaty and muffled from your position. 

He growls against you and you nearly cum then. One of his hands drops to squeeze the soft mound of your right breast. Your cheeks burn, sweat beginning to bead on your forehead and neck. You can feel your pussy throbbing - hot and sticky and swollen with stimulation - as he devours it like the flesh of ripened fruit. His lips encircle your clit and suckle as the tip of his tongue flicks over the erect peak of your bud.

And then it all goes white. You lose all sense but feeling as you rock your hips up to meet him, the tension in your abdominals adding sinfully to the fluttering pulsating of your pussy. There’s nothing but you and him and his arms around you and his mouth against the most intimate parts of you as your orgasm washes over you in electrifying slow-motion, pulling you under a tidal wave of bliss for what seems like an eternity. Your lips part in a silent scream of his name, your eyes pressed shut, as he works you through the longest and most intense climax your body has ever experienced.

You feel him place one last sweet, gentle kiss to your cunt before moving the hand on your breast to one of your thighs as he guides you back down onto the bed. You’re panting and boneless as you watch him draw an arm over his cum-slicked chin and cheeks. For a moment he simply looks down at you, a victorious air about him as his eyes trace your sated features and his gorgeous chest heaves with labored breath, then he crawls forward on the bed, stretching himself out on his side next to you, his body flush with your own. He slips his hand over the soft skin of your belly and rubs it soothingly as he watches you with a little grin.

“You good?” he asks in a raspy murmur.

You reach for his face, bringing it to yours as you kiss him with what wherewithal you have. You pull away, still breathless.

“Am I good? Seo Changbin, I think I could fly.”

His answering smile is so filled with joy and pride and affection that you think you truly may have sprouted wings. You roll to your side to press yourself against him, your hand tugging at the waistband of his pajamas, but he takes your hand again in his.

“Not tonight.”

“Why?”

“Tonight is yours.”

“Bin…”

“I’m yours.”

You blink up at him, his head resting on his hand, his eyes sparkling and soft.

“If you’ll have me,” he raises your hand to his lips to kiss your knuckles. “You don’t have to answer right now. I know you’re going through a lot, and this is all…new.” 

He smiles again, glancing down as his features take on a boyish shyness.

  “But I care for you. And, however things work out,” his eyes lock with yours again, “I’ll always protect you.” 

Your heart stands still. There are things that are too deeply lovely for words to be wasted on them. Any words but three - three that are already deeply true, but which have begun to mean something beautiful and different tonight, burying themselves like a little seed in your heart that needs time to grow. So for now you let yourself cry tears that fall like raindrops in the sunlight, and drift to sleep with the steady beat of Changbin’s heart.

“Ay!” Nari’s voice cuts through the din of chatter as her hand shoots out to narrowly prevent a fellow patron from snagging the chair beside her. “Sorry, seats are taken.”

She takes a sip of her beer and stretches her short legs as far as they will reach across the two empty chairs beside her.

“The guys are gonna have to hustle if they’re gonna sit with us,” she says reproachfully, dark brows rising as her eyes scan the venue for the bodies that belong in the seats you have been desperately attempting to reserve for the last hour.

The Eight Ball is crowded to bursting, and you scan the stage for signs of the evening’s openers. Checking your phone, you find that it’s nearly eight. You also find a text that brings a smirk to your lips.

“What?”

You glance up at Nari, who’s staring at you suspiciously.

“Nothing…” you mumble, flipping your phone back over onto the table. You sip your cocktail through a straw.

“Are you texting him?”

You nearly choke on your drink.

“What? Who?”

“You know who,” Nari mocks, narrowing her eyes at you. “The jerkwad.”

“Oh my god, Nari, no!” you sigh, as your phone buzzes again. 

She glances at it.

“Then what was with the look? Who are you…”

“Are these for us?” a voice belonging to a smiling, dimpled young man in a black hoodie with a matching beanie pulled over his head saves you from further explanation.

“Jesus, Chris, finally,” Nari admonishes as he takes the seat next to you, pulling her legs off the remaining chairs to free them up for the other two men that follow behind him. 

The freckled blond pulls Nari into a side hug which she returns, booping his nose before leaning across him to peer menacingly at his friend.

“Yo, Jisung,” she barks, “If you’re gonna order several hundred pizzas, how about taking some with you next time? My fridge is still stuffed.”

The young man blinks wide, surprised eyes at her before his brain catches up with her scolding.

“Sorry, but it wasn’t my fault!” he insists poutingly. “I ordered them because Changbin asked me to and then he canceled gaming weekend ‘cause he had a girl over.” he grumbles, causing the other two to snicker.

“Nice,” Chris giggles.

This time you do choke.

Your eyes fly to your best friend, watching the barrage of questions bubbling up on her face when a voice cuts through the din, silencing the crowd and unknowingly saving himself for the time being.

“Good evening, Eight Ballers!” Changbin rasps into his mic as Hyunjin waves, as ridiculously beautiful as ever, beside him.

You look at Changbin’s eyes.

They’re bright and confident and determined. You smile and cheer when he finishes introductions. As the band hits the first few notes of the opening number, his gaze finds yours, and it’s full of so many things.

His eyes sparkle with seven days worth of secrets – of waking up to your eyes and arms, of a weekend of nothing but bare bodies and hearts, of weeknight phone calls until the wee hours of the morning…of a new way of caring for each other that you’ll eventually tell the others, but that is just yours for now.

As you look at him, so full of adoration, you hope you can offer him even a fraction of the new world he’s only just begun to share with you – and the reflection you see a little more beautifully each day in the light of his eyes.

-Fin-

#changbin fic #changbin smut #changbin fluff #changbin x reader #changbin x you #changbin x y/n #changbin x female reader #changbin fanfic #changbin oneshot #changbin imagines #changbin scenarios #skz fic #skz fanfic #skz reader insert #skz imagine #skz scenarios #skz oneshots #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fic #skz smut #skz fluff #skz imagines #stray kids reader insert #stray kids smut #stray kids fluff #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids oneshot #seo changbin fic #seo changbin smut

[blueberrylixie]

yes, professor

professor changbin x fem! student reader 

word count: 9,903

content warnings: oral sex (m and f receiving), vaginal penetration, pussy job, fingering, overstimulation, unprotected sex, creampie (use protection kids!), professor kink, pet names (princess, angel, baby), light degradation (bin calls her a slut mostly), spanking with hand and a ruler, classroom sex.

let me know if i missed anything in this one-shot bc i tend to miss stuff! if you want to skip to the smut, scroll to the white heart divider!

Your first day of your last year of college was already off to a bad start. 

Not only was it already eighty-eight degrees out at only ten in the morning, but you had tripped and fallen on your way out of your dorm, and skinned your knee. The cut still hurt like a bitch, even as you traipsed the fifteen minutes to your first class of the day. 

And that was really the cherry on top of this miserable summer day. You had to attend your first and only college math class. And you were absolute shit at math.

If you had your way, you wouldn’t be taking this course at all. Not only were you bad at the subject, but you hated it. You wanted to become a technical writer, which 90% of the time didn’t actually require you to know any math. Writing? Love. Science? Fine. Even history was passable, Cs get degrees and all that. But math, for lack of better words, was the bane of your existence. You even struggled to pass back in high school. 

So no one could blame you for putting off this class until practically the last second. You didn’t want this to be your very last course before graduation, because that would be absolute torture. So you buckled in to take it your fall semester instead.

And oh how you were regretting it. 

Now, you stood outside the classroom. The little window on the door was covered with white paper, so you couldn’t see inside. If you could, you would probably have run away. 

Instead, you steeled yourself, straightened your shoulders, took a deep breath, and pushed it open. 

You had arrived a few minutes early, a little later than you usually were to other classes. You had admittedly stalled back at your dorm for as long as possible, knowing what was in store. 

You took a seat in the second row, a few seats away from a quiet-looking guy with dark hair. You pulled a notebook and pencil out of your backpack, before looking up at the front of the room.

And that was when you saw him.

He was standing facing away from you, writing something on the chalkboard. He wasn’t very tall, but he was incredibly built. His broad shoulders flexed in that navy blue button-up as he wrote, and you couldn’t help but check him out. His movements were confident and sure, like he knew he belonged up there. 

You’d never had a hot professor before. Maybe that was about to change.

Of course, he could have an unattractive face, you reminded yourself. Or even worse, a shitty personality. Just because he was ripped didn’t mean he was hot.

Then, he turned around.

Dear God. Your heart rate picked up immediately, your chest contracting as you gazed upon him rapturously. You didn't want to look behind you to see if anyone else felt the same way. There was no way they didn't. 

His dark hair was styled casually, wavy bangs sweeping across his forehead. He had kind, intelligent, yet humorous eyes, adorned with thick-framed black glasses, and small but full lips. Your eyes kept zeroing in on them, and you found yourself wondering what they would feel like against yours.

You shook your head, instantly clearing that thought from your mind. You could not be imagining your professor in that way. Even if he was young, maybe five years older than you at the most. You could not think about him like that. You were terrible enough at math as it was, and you couldn't afford to get distracted.

But when he smiled at the class, your mind went blank, forgetting your little pep talk. God, how could a man look so fine by simply existing?

“Good morning, class,” he said, pointing up at the board. My name is-“

Seo Changbin. 

You read the two words, written in a rushed, messy scrawl. You almost mouthed his name, wanting to feel what it was like to say it. But you kept your mouth shut. 

“My name is Seo Changbin, and I’m your professor this semester,” he continued. “This is a mid-level calculus class, so if that’s not what you’re here for, then you should probably leave now.”

You inwardly sighed. Taking a mid-level math class when you hadn’t taken math in four years seemed dangerous. And honestly, in any other situation, you might have hopped up and left, off to find the easiest possible course the school offered.

But how could you pass up the chance to be around this absolute specimen of a man for an entire semester?

So you stayed put.

“Good.” Changbin moved his hair out of his face, and you watched with a fervor you never thought possible. If your friends could see you, they would call you a simp. For this man, hell yes you were. 

“Now, I’ll be coming around with the syllabus.” He held up a stack of papers. “We’ll go over it, and then jump into the first lesson. Don’t worry, it’s nothing crazy. Yet.” He smirked, and your breath stuttered in your throat. Every time you assumed he couldn’t get any hotter, he inevitably did.

He started making his way up and down the rows of students, handing them the small syllabus. He greeted a few who he must have known from a previous course, asking them how their summer was. 

So he was an attentive teacher, too. Dammit.

Finally, he reached you. When your eyes met, just the hint of a smile graced those perfect lips. You held his gaze, unable to look away. Your entire body was on fire, and you crossed your legs in what you hoped was a casual manner. 

For a split second, you could have sworn his eyes flicked up and down your body, once, checking you out. But it was so fast, you couldn’t tell. Your face was so hot, you couldn’t think straight.

“And what’s your name?” he asked, coming to a stop in front of you. 

As you introduced yourself, he took a step nearer, leaning down. He wasn’t even that close, but you instantly felt the need to pull him to you. You weren’t sure if he felt it too, but the energy between you was magnetic. 

“Are you new here?” he asked curiously. “I’ve never seen you in my class before.”

“No, I don’t usually take math classes,” you responded. “This is my first and only one, actually. I’m an English major, but it was required.”

“So you’re a senior?” he chuckled. “Waited till the last possible minute to join us, did you?”

You shrugged, embarrassment threatening to overwhelm you. But you didn’t let it show, simply shrugging and smiling at him. “Math isn’t my thing.”

“Well, hopefully I can change that,” he grinned, handing you a syllabus. “Welcome.”

As he started class, you became enthralled with how knowledgeable he was. While most everything went over your head, you found yourself wanting to understand what he was saying. You wanted to impress him, wanted him to be proud of you. So while you would usually space out and succumb to boredom, you actually read the syllabus in its entirety, and took vigorous notes. Even if it was boring, you wanted to hear every word that came out of Changbin’s mouth.

When class was over, and you were packing up, Changbin walked over to the desks, saying goodbye to some of the students. You ignored him, not wanting to come off as too eager.

“It was nice to meet you, Miss English Major,” Changbin said, and you looked up, shocked that he remembered anything about you.

You glowered at him, rolling your eyes playfully. “Is that all you’re going to refer to me as from now on?” you teased.

He shrugged, straightening his shirt and smiling. “Once I get to know you, I’m sure I’ll refer to you as something else. For now, have a good day, Miss English Major.”

——————————

Two weeks passed uneventfully. 

Changbin’s calculus class had started ramping up, and you were barely surviving. Everything was very confusing, and you found yourself blacking out for most of class just staring at your hot professor, instead of learning. All your other courses were a breeze, which left you tons of time to focus on failing to understand basic math. 

You and Changbin had continued to talk, a little bit every day after class. He would ask you about your other courses, mostly about writing and all kinds of grammar. He seemed genuinely interested in you and your life, which was so opposite from any other teacher. He even wanted to know about your personal life, like your family and friends. You told him everything. Except the fact that your friends were dying to meet your aforementioned “hot professor”. It felt nice knowing that he supported you, even if you were inevitably going to fail his class.

You fell into a nice groove, of sorts. You would act cool, funny, even effortless, to his face, and when you got back to your dorm, when none of your roommates were back yet, you would touch yourself to the thought of him. Fantasizing about his rough, strong hands holding your thighs open as he ate you out, or him caging you in between his huge arms as he pounded into you from behind. You couldn’t help it, you were infatuated by him. You wanted him, no matter how terrible you were doing in his class.

All that changed on the Monday of your third week.

“Next week, we’re having our first test,” Changbin announced as he stood at the front of the room. He turned on the projector to display a PowerPoint presentation with information about the test.

It would be thirty percent of your overall grade. One test?? Thirty percent??

You felt your mouth hanging open as you stared up at the screen, then down at Changbin. How could such a kind, handsome man do this to you? Was he trying to make you fail?

Changbin met your eyes, and a smile graced his lips. You snapped your mouth shut, feeling your face warm. He definitely just saw you gaping at him like a fish. Totally smooth.

“I know some of you may be worried, and some of you may not,” he said. “And if you’re one of the former, I would love for you to stay after class and talk to me about it. I know you all have the ability to pass this test. Every answer to every question is in your notes. Study those as hard as you can, and you’ll be more than fine.”

You could feel your heart rate picking up as you thought back on the dozens of pages of notes you’d taken over the past four classes. You couldn’t think  of anything that made sense. How were you supposed to take a test and pass? Let alone one that was worth so much of your grade?

For the rest of the lecture, you could scarcely pay attention as you continued to spiral. Clearly, you should have just taken a different class, hot teacher be damned. To be fair, you hadn’t expected the class to be this hard. 

As the class ended, you started packing up in a daze. You had a morphology course - one of your favorites - next, but you were thinking about skipping it so you could study for this test instead. Even a week straight of studying probably wouldn’t be enough for you to pass, so you needed all the time you could get.

You were so wrapped up in your thoughts that you didn’t even notice someone calling your name, over and over again.

“Miss English Major! Miss!” Changbin finally called, and your head whipped around to face him, your cheeks warming at the nickname.

“I-sorry, what’s up?” You stumbled over your words, trying not to look completely flustered. From his look of understanding, you knew you had failed.

“Would you like to study with me tonight?” he asked gently, approaching your desk. 

“Ah, why would you think I need extra studying?” you asked quickly.

“I have eyes,” he said with a quiet laugh. “And you look like you’re about to pass out. Really, the test isn’t going to be hard. But like I said earlier, I’m more than willing to tutor any student who needs help. I have the time.”

You sighed. “Am I really that obvious? Or do I just look like an idiot?”

Changbin shrugged, moving so he stood in front of you. “I can tell you’re really smart. You just don’t believe in yourself. So… I’ll see you at six tonight? I’ll bring donuts?”

You relented, grinning. “If you bring glazed donuts, I’m in.”

“Are there any other kinds?” he winked. “See you tonight.”

Oh, you were so done for.

——————————

You arrived at 5:55pm, terrified of being late, or wasting Changbin’s time. You assumed he was so busy already, and you didn’t want him waiting on you.

Seeing as he wasn’t there yet, you just stood awkwardly at the side of the room, unsure if you should pull up a seat by his desk, or just wait for him.

He arrived a few minutes later, carrying a cardboard box from the campus donut shop. Your heart leaped when you saw him, dressed in a casual black t-shirt, zip-up hoodie, and jeans. He would have fit right in as a student. 

“Oh, you’re already here.” Changbin grinned at you, and your face heated. He was so hot when he smiled. 

“I’m always on time,” you pointed out.

“You’re always late to my class,” Changbin chuckled, shaking his head.

“Maybe it’s because I don’t like your class,” you countered.

“Ouch.” He came to sit at his desk. “Here, sit with me.” He motioned to the chair next to his. 

“So, what would you like more help with?” He asked when you got settled.

You sighed. “What don’t I need help with?”

He frowned, tilting his head. “Am I really that bad of a teacher?”

“No!” you said hurriedly. “Math just really isn’t my thing. I probably made a mistake taking a mid-level class. Everything is just really over my head. It’s not your fault.”

“Well, we can start from the beginning,” Changbin conceded. He glanced down at your notebook, which was covered in your neat but hurried scrawl, and even a few shitty doodles at the top of each page. “May I?” he asked, pointing at them.

You nodded, pushing them towards him. 

He took it, and flipped back to the beginning. “You’ve taken really thorough notes,” he complimented, and you blushed. At least you were doing something right.

“I’m trying to pay attention to you.” You smiled weakly.

Changbin started pointing at things in your notes, trying to explain them as thoroughly as possible. You had to admit, he was very good at dumbing down every concept, and even gave you examples of when they might be used in the real world. That tended to be your struggle with math. None of it made any practical sense, it was so abstract. At least with words, they always correlated to a real-world thing, or concept. Math was filled with what-ifs, and you hated that.

As he pointed at your notes, he moved closer and closer to you, his arm brushing yours. Your skin tingled from the touch, almost desperate to feel more of him. His arms were so firm, entirely made of muscle. Of course, you had known that from hours of staring at him. But being this close to him, getting to touch him, was intoxicating, making your mouth water. If only you could reach out and-

“Are you even listening to me?” Changbin’s voice snapped you out of your lusting. 

“Yes! I was just uhh…” you paused, unsure what to say.

He raised an eyebrow at you, pushing his glasses higher up his nose. 

“Ah, no I wasn’t. I’m sorry.” You ducked your head, unable to meet his gaze.

He turned his chair to face yours. “I’m sorry, this is all probably way too much all at once. I should have realized that,” he apologized. “Maybe we should take a five? Then we’ll get back into it.”

You brightened, nodding quickly. “Yeah, that would be great.”

He grinned, sitting back in his chair. “You’re nothing like my usual math students, you know.”

You raised your brows at him. “That sounds like a badly veiled insult, Professor Seo.”

His eyes darkened for a moment at the way you said his name, but he seemed to shake it off immediately. “No, it’s just an observation. You’re very different.”

“How?” Your eyes drifted over to the box of donuts, which sat untouched next to you.

He shook his head at you. “Because of stuff like that. You’re very easily distracted. Just have one, or I’ll never get your attention back.”

You smiled apologetically, before tearing the box open and grabbing a glazed donut. “I can’t believe you actually brought these for me.”

“For you??” Changbin exclaimed. “Nah, I wanted them. You were just an excuse. Pass one here.”

You glared, taking a bite. “Okay that’s rude. I would think you cared more about your struggling student.” You handed him a donut.

He laughed at that before taking a bite too. “Of course I care about you.”

You gazed into his eyes, watching the way his throat moved as he swallowed. Your eyes flickered back up to his, wondering if there might, just might, be a hidden meaning behind that. 

Before you could stop yourself, or fully process what you were doing, you felt yourself moving imperceptibly closer to him, like there was an invisible force pulling you. 

Your face was a mere foot away from his, your eyes remaining locked with his. “How else am I different from the others, Professor?”

He groaned, a low sound deep in his throat, and you saw a flame flicker to life in his eyes. A flame of desire, you wondered? Did he want you just as badly as you wanted him? Had he thought about you in the same way you thought about him? Your stomach twisted with desire, hot and potent. 

Your hand reached out to grip his thigh, desperate to touch him. But before you could make contact, his hand grabbed your wrist, stopping you.

“What-“ you began.

“We can’t do this,” he said. His voice was quiet, but firm. 

“What are you…?” you trailed off, your heart thudding so hard your head hurt. Was he rejecting you right now? After that almost animalistic noise came from him, just by making eye contact?  A noise that would most definitely be used to fuel your nightly desires? “But you were just flirting with me!”

“I was,” he paused, licking his lips. You wanted to know what that tongue tasted like. “But I can’t. You’re my student, and it was incredibly unprofessional of me. I’m sorry.”

You pulled your hand from his grip, moving your chair away from him, fighting to keep your voice steady. “Yes, you’re right. Let’s continue studying.”

“Okay.” Changbin nodded, picking up your notebook again. “Onto lesson two.”

You continued the study session for another hour, before bidding him farewell. He promised that he would continue to help you study for two hours every night, and you agreed. He also demanded that you take the rest of the donuts home, but you refused. It felt wrong, somehow, to take something from him. 

You walked back to your dorm, body burning with shame.

——————————

For the rest of the week, you dutifully attended each study session with Changbin, carefully avoiding any kind of physical closeness with him. You knew that if you got near him again, you wouldn’t be able to control yourself. 

Your thoughts were plagued by images of him. The way he smirked playfully at you when you got a question wrong, the glimmer of pride in his eyes when you got one right. His strong arms as he leaned over your notes, and his tight ass and muscular legs when he stood in front of the chalkboard to write every morning, or give lectures. 

No matter how hard you tried to ignore your growing feelings for him, you couldn’t help it. Every night, you found yourself desperately touching yourself to the thought of him doing unspeakable things to you, imagining it was him ravaging you instead of your vibrator. Him straddling you from above as he pounded into you with that thick cock, instead of your fingers. At this point, you knew it would never happen, but the forbidden, risky aspect turned you on even more.

Finally, the day of the test had arrived. Your heart had been racing with adrenaline. The night before, you had left this very classroom, saying goodnight to Changbin before cramming even more. 

“Good luck, Miss.” He’d smiled at you on your way out.

“Thanks, I’m really gonna need it,” you had replied.

“No you don’t,” Changbin said as you left.

The test had been shockingly easy. You weren’t sure if it was because Changbin purposely made the questions simpler than usual, or if his study sessions really had helped. But you whizzed through that test like never before. It gave you hope that maybe, just maybe, you weren’t absolute shit at math after all.

Now, Changbin was passing out the test results. You hoped your gut instinct that you’d done well was right.

He placed the test on your desk, shooting you a faint smile.

“Well done, Miss English Major,” he whispered, so quiet you could barely hear him.

You peeked at the top right corner, almost afraid of what it said. 

92%.

Your head whipped around to face Changbin, who was now a couple of desks down. 

Holy shit. Not only had you passed, but you passed with an A! How was that possible??

You wanted to run over to him and leap into his arms, but you had to hold yourself back. No one, including Changbin, wanted that.

You would wait until the end of class to celebrate.

As you packed up your bags, Changbin cleared his throat. 

You looked up to see him motioning you towards him. Of course, you couldn’t help but obey.

After the other students had left, you approached him, a huge smile plastered across your face.

“I passed!” you exclaimed, suddenly breathless. “I-I can’t believe it! Thank you.”

He shook his head, unable to hide his smile. “It was all you. You studied harder than I’ve ever seen any student do before. You earned it.”

Before you could stop yourself, you wrapped your arms around his midsection and hugged him.

“Seriously, thank you,” you said quietly. “I’ve never gotten an A on a math test, ever.”

Changbin laughed, and for a split second you thought he was going to hug you back. His arms raised to grab your waist, and your heart thudded in anticipation. You had thought about what it would feel like to be in Changbin’s arms countless times.

But instead, he pushed you away. His movements were gentle, respectful even, like he didn’t want to hurt your feelings.

It did quite the opposite. It stung more to know that he wasn’t an asshole who just wanted a girl's attention, but he thought he was doing the right thing in rejecting you for a second time.

“Well… thanks again,” you said lamely, moving away from him. “I’ll see you next week.”

You practically ran out of the room, tears stinging your eyes. You wouldn’t let yourself get hurt again.

——————————

Changbin stood at the front of his classroom, preparing for that day’s lesson. It was two months into the semester, and about time for another test. The last one had been almost a month and a half ago, and his students were beginning to get complacent. It was his job to make sure they didn’t get too comfortable.

It had also been about a month and a half since he’d properly talked to you. Ever since you had thanked him for all his help on that first math test, you had avoided him. 

He wished you wouldn’t. But you were right to. He would have done the same thing if roles were reversed.

He had rejected you, twice. Those glorious five days tutoring you were some of the best times he’d had in his entire three years as a professor. He’d never met someone half as bright, witty, or funny as you. 

Or as beautiful. 

Let’s be real, fucking sexy.

That first day of class, when he’d turned around and met your gaze, still stuck with him. Those curious yet guarded eyes of yours instantly drew him in, and he’d had to inwardly slap himself just to focus on his job. He’d never let anyone distract him from work before, let alone one of his students. He’d worked hard to get where he was, and ever since he got the job, he’d made a promise to himself never to date a student. From watching his colleagues, it never ended well.

And no one had ever made him question that promise. Until you.

Everything about you intoxicated him. The way you rolled your eyes at his cringey jokes, that little crease in your left eyebrow when you were focusing extra hard, the dimple on your left cheek when you smiled. Your determination to be good at whatever you put your mind to. And something he hadn’t expected: your desire to please him. 

In a strictly professional sense, of course. Or so he convinced himself. Until you two had almost kissed. And he’d told you no. That had to be in the top five of his stupidest moments, and he had a lot of those.

For that whole week, he’d found himself wishing that you would try again. He couldn’t stop thinking about you. When he went home to his empty apartment, he found solace in his hand, thoughts solely on you. About the way it would feel if it was your hand instead of his, gripping his shaft as you stroked him up and down, those nimble fingers knowing exactly where to place more pressure, where to be gentle. That pretty mouth of yours wrapped around him, taking his thick cock to the hilt. And he would cum to the thought of you, knowing that he couldn’t have you.

Even when you hugged him after the test, he still rebuffed your advances. Why? What the hell was wrong with him? He wanted you, you wanted him. It was legal, you were both adults. And yet, he had still rejected you. 

He still thought about you, obsessively so. The more he came to the fantasy of you, the more he became reliant on your presence, craved it, really. He looked forward to seeing you everyday in class, even if you didn’t speak a word to, or barely looked at him. But your beautiful self walking to his class by yourself, gave him a sense of security.

Today, he arrived at class, eagerly awaiting your presence. When he turned around to face the door, slightly concerned because even two minutes into class, you hadn’t arrived, his stomach quite literally dropped.

Because you weren’t alone. 

——————————

Hwang Hyunjin was the smoothest man alive.

You’d noticed him sitting a few seats away from you since the first day of class. He was incredibly smart, but tended to keep his mouth shut. He was always busy writing or drawing something on his notes instead of paying attention, and when you weren’t busy staring at Changbin, you found yourself watching him instead.

The two of you had been paired up for a class discussion, and he mentioned that he loved art. Being the creative that you were, you asked him what he liked to draw, and he showed you some of the doodles he did during class. They were good, really good. 

When he asked you out for coffee a month into the semester, you’d had no choice but to say yes. And you had a great time. 

It was clear that Changbin had no interest in you, so who could blame you for wanting to spend time with another hot guy? Who cared if you still thought about him in the privacy of your dorm, late at night? That was just a phase. Every college girl had a crush on her professor at some point, right? 

You and Hyunjin weren’t really seeing each other, it was casual. So you had never come to class together, or showed any sign that you were interested in each other.

Until today. 

Hyunjin had walked you to class, after treating you to coffee. You were even later than usual, but you found that you didn’t mind.

But when you walked into the classroom, and Hyunjin suddenly grabbed your hand, it was clear that someone minded. They minded a hell of a lot.

Changbin’s eyes seared into the two of you, his gaze roaming over both your and Hyunjin’s faces, before landing on your connected hands. His jaw clenched and unclenched, a vein ticking in his forehead, but he stayed quiet. His fists were pulled tight at his sides, those huge arms flexing in a most mesmerizing way. You couldn’t help but stare. Was there the potential that he was… jealous? 

Of you. Being with another guy.

Before you could think about it further, Changbin cleared his throat, and Hyunjin sat next to you for the first time that semester. 

You should feel giddy that this gorgeous man was sitting with you, but you couldn’t pay attention to anything, except your stud of a professor glaring at Hyunjin like he wanted him to disappear. 

“Today, we’re going to be discussing next week’s test,” Changbin ground out, his teeth gritted so hard you could hear them scraping against one another. “Mister Hwang, do you remember what our first unit after last month’s test was?”

Hyunjin paused next to you, brows furrowed. How was he supposed to remember what you’d learned over a month ago, off the top of his head?

“No Professor, I don’t,” he said evenly. “If I could just check my notes-“

“No, you may not,” Changbin snarled, his eyes narrowed as he stared Hyunjin down. “Clearly, you weren’t paying close enough attention.”

“Professor!” you exclaimed, blood pounding. Why was he targeting Hyunjin all of a sudden? You thought he liked Hyunjin.

“What?” Changbin sneered. “Trying to protect your boyfriend?”

“Just don’t.” You rolled your eyes, looking away from him. 

For the rest of the class, Changbin continued to pick on Hyunjin, calling on him for the hardest review questions, and actually laughing at him when he couldn’t remember.

Finally, when class was over, the two of you made to leave. 

“Miss, please stay behind,” Changbin practically growled, gaze hot on your back.

“Will you be okay?” Hyunjin asked, glancing between the two of you.

You nodded. “Yeah, don’t worry about me. I’ll see you later.”

Hyunjin followed the rest of the class out, casting one last look back at you.

🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

You stood behind your desk, staring at Changbin. He stared back at you, expression unreadable. Was he upset? Of course he was. He wasn’t very good at hiding that during class. 

He walked to the door and slammed it shut, the force startling you. But when he clicked the lock in place, your chest seized up. What was he doing? 

“Come here.” His voice was soft, yet you could hear him clearly. His face looked calm, but you could see the fire in his eyes as he gazed at you. Your breath caught in your throat as you wordlessly obeyed, coming to stand in front of him.

Was this really going to happen? Was he-

Before you could formulate a proper prediction, his lips were on yours. His hands fumbled at your waist with a desperation you didn’t expect, even in your dirtiest fantasies. He picked you up, grabbing your ass roughly as his plush lips forced your mouth open, sucking and biting with enough pressure that would leave marks in the morning. 

“Fuck, I’ve wanted to do this for so long,” Changbin growled against you between kisses. Your hands slid into his hair, clinging to him as you kissed him back with equal strength. 

“What took you so damn long?” you gasped, pressing your tongue into his mouth and rolling your hips against him.

He groaned, the sound low and guttural, before setting you on his desk as gently as he could. He slid a finger under your tank top strap, pushing it down slowly, his gaze devouring your skin rapturously.

“I’ve been so good, so in control,” he breathed as if you were torturing him, his mouth coming to land against the shell of your ear. You shivered at the sensation. “Until today, when you decided to bring that poor Hwang boy along with you. What are you, boyfriend and girlfriend?”

You shook your head quickly. “N-no, it’s casual,” your voice shook despite yourself. “We’ve just been hanging out.”

“You like that he’s willing to give you attention when I wouldn’t?” He leaned down, nipping at your shoulder and collarbone. “Has he fucked you?”

You moaned softly, closing your eyes. “No, of course not,” you whispered. “And even if he had, why would you give a shit? I made a move on you, and you fucking rejected me, twice!”

Changbin let go of you, stepping back. For the first time, he looked embarrassed. Good, as he should. 

“I'm sorry, Princess.” He slid a hand down your arm, skating his fingers across your skin. “I thought I was making the right decision. But… I want you all to myself. Is that so bad?”

You glared at him. But no matter how long you tried to play hard to get, you knew damn well how this was going to end. You needed him too badly.

“Well, you better prove how much you want me, then.”

His mouth curled into a smirk, and your core dampened at the sight. “I thought you’d never ask.”

He pushed you back against his desk, shoving your legs apart, before tugging your denim shorts down your legs and ripping your panties clean in half.

“Changbin!” you gasped. Those were your nice panties, too.

“What? You won’t be needing them,” he smirked, holding them to his nose and inhaling a hungry breath, before tossing them away. “And from now on, you will call me Professor, not Changbin.”

You gaped at him for a moment, before you realized he was watching you expectantly.

“Y-yes… Professor,” you said weakly.

He smiled, kissing your cheek in an uncharacteristically tender way. “That’s my good girl. Now I’ll make you feel the best you’ve ever felt.”

He traveled down the length of your body, pressing kisses to your bare thighs as he went, admiring every inch of you. Your breaths came in short gasps as you laid in anticipation. You didn’t know much, but you were sure that Changbin was experienced when it came to sex.

As he gazed in appreciation at your soaked cunt, he tore his glasses off and set them on the desk, licking his lips. “Gonna need to get close and personal, huh Princess?”

Oh yeah, he was most definitely experienced. 

But nothing could prepare you for the sensation of Changbin’s tongue against your center. He pressed his mouth flat against your clit, swiping his tongue up and down in broad strokes. He covered your entire pussy with his warm, wet mouth before sucking and licking in earnest. 

“Holy shit, yes,” you gasped, your eyes widening as your hips jerked up against his movements.

He grabbed your waist to stop you, his tongue fucking in and out of your cunt as his lips pressed against the sensitive nerves above it. You moaned, your hand finding purchase in his hair as your vision sparked in and out, stars flashing before your eyes.

“Fuck, faster, please,” you begged, tugging his hair as you tried to pull him closer.

“What’s my name again, Princess?” he rasped against your core, his voice interrupted by his continued slurping. 

“P-professor, please,” you whimpered, gazing at him with wide, pleading eyes.

“Fuck, how could I say no to you, Princess,” he snarled against you, yanking your legs open even further as his tongue moved impossibly faster, two of his fingers sliding into your pussy, adding even more squelching sounds to the mix.

The addition of his fingers nearly sent you spinning over the edge, your free hand gripping the side of his desk as your legs shook, your thighs trying to squeeze his head.

“Stay nice and spread for me, Angel,” he sucked hard on your clit, and you sobbed his name over and over, clutching at him like your life depended on it, your entire body vibrating.

“Professor, I-I’m gonna cum, please let me cum!” you begged, squeezing your eyes shut as you ground your hips up against him, this time Changbin allowing you.

“Cum for me, Princess, let me hear you,” Changbin ordered, pressing his tongue in just the right way against your throbbing pussy.

With a strangled cry, you rode out your orgasm against his mouth and fingers as he thrusted them in harder and harder, working you through your release as you crested the peak and came tumbling over, your whole body falling onto the desk in a trembling, sobbing mess.

“Was that good enough for you, Princess?” Changbin licked his lips as he gazed at you smugly, coming to his feet and gazing down at you.

You rolled your eyes, standing up to meet his eyes properly. “It was amazing, Professor,” you murmured against his lips, before kissing him forcefully. The taste of you lingered on his lips.

He kissed you back hungrily, his fingers traveling back between your legs to rub your clit gently, his tongue slipping into your mouth. You licked his bottom lip, grinding against his fingers as you moaned into him. 

“Let me return the favor,” you whispered, pushing him against the desk this time, before kneeling in front of him.

“Let’s just hope you’re better with your mouth than you are at math,” Changbin teased. But you could see the desire flaming in his gaze as he caressed your hair with a rough hand, fully pushing you down onto the floor.

“You don’t have to worry about that, Professor,” you said sweetly, and he groaned, eyes flickering shut.

“No more dawdling Angel, open up.”

You unzipped his black work pants, tugging them down to his knees. Even with his dark gray boxers on, you could tell he was huge, and already hard. Pulling his underwear off, his cock sprang free, angry and red, leaking precum.

Your eyes widened, and Changbin kicked his pants to the side, smirking down at you. 

“Big enough for you, Princess?”

“Perfect, Professor,” you breathed, gripping the base with one hand.

“Ah shit,” Changbin gritted his teeth, his hand already tangled in your hair. “Don’t make me wait too long, Princess. I’ve already been waiting for months.”

You giggled softly, sticking your tongue out and kitten licking the pretty pink tip. He was quite thick, so thick that your hand could barely fit around him. He was about seven inches long, with a pretty vein running along the right side. Your core throbbed at the sight, imagining how well he would fill you up. 

“Fuck,” he snarled, thrusting into your hand impatiently, a bead of precum dribbling onto your skin. “Are you asking me to punish you, Princess?”

You felt your core clench at his words, and you almost hoped he would just flip you over and spank you for disobeying him.

But that could happen later. Instead, you slid his entire length into your mouth, taking him so deep your nose hit his hips. Coarse brown hair tickled your face, and you shut your eyes. 

“Holy-“ Changbin choked out as you began sucking hard and fast, using your hand to rub the base where your mouth couldn’t reach. Your saliva instantly became sloppy, running down his cock and onto his waist.

“Oh fuck yeah, just like that,” he grunted, tugging your hair roughly as he thrust his hips against you, driving his cock further into your mouth. “I bet you just love being my little cockslut, don’t you Princess? You like me using you like this.”

“Mm,” you moaned, sending vibrations up his cock. He shuddered at the sensation, his huge, muscular legs flexing next to you. One of your hands gripped his thigh, the other squeezing his taut ass as you fucked your mouth up and down on him so he didn’t even have to move.

“Oh shit, you do know what you’re doing, don’t you, Slut?” He ran his hand through your hair, and you felt a tinge of pride shoot through you. A thin line of tears dotted your lash line and your jaw hurt, but you didn’t care. He was impressed with you, and that was all that mattered. 

“Only for you, Professor,” you gasped as you took a quick breath, before sliding him back into your mouth. Your hands moved to cup his balls, and he growled, loud and animalistic, against you.

“Fuck Angel, you’re such a good girl for your professor, aren’t you?” he moaned, pulling your hair into two makeshift ponytails as he started fucking against you in earnest.

You started to choke on his harsh ministrations, but you didn’t want him to stop. Your core was so wet, arousal was dripping onto the ground. 

“I’m gonna cum, Princess,” Changbin growled, as his hips stilled. “But I don’t want to cum in your mouth. I want to breed that little pussy of yours. How does that sound?”

“I-it sounds amazing, Professor,” you breathed as you pulled his rock-hard cock out of your mouth.

He grinned, yanking you into another bruising kiss. “That’s my good little Cockslut,” he murmured, picking you up and setting you back on the desk. “This is exactly how I imagined fucking you for the first time. You look so beautiful lying there, all wet and ready for me.”

You whimpered softly, shooting a seductively innocent look at him.

“Fuck, do you know what you do to me, Angel?” He closed his eyes, his body trembling at the sight before him. “Even better than my imagination.”

“You’ve thought about me, Professor?” you said faux-shyly, grabbing his hand and placing it against your core.

“Of course I have, Princess,” Changbin chuckled, opening his eyes again as his fingers roamed over your clit gently. You shivered at his touch. “Who wouldn’t think about ruining a perfect girl like you?”

“I'm not a virgin, Professor,” you pointed out. 

“I know, but you’re perfect,” he responded, stepping closer. “Just look at you.”

“Professor?” you asked softly, gazing at him. “Can I ask just one thing?”

“Anything.”

“Can you take your shirt off?”

Changbin’s eyes flickered in amusement. “Do you like my body, Princess?”

You nodded vigorously. “I love your body. I think about it all the time.”

“I like the sound of that,” he murmured, leaning over and pressing harsh kisses against your neck. “What do you think about?”

“Fuck me, then I’ll tell you,” you breathed against him, starting to undo his shirt buttons.

He tugged the shirt over his head hurriedly, before coming to hover over you again, those perfect, muscular arms of your dreams caging you in. You whimpered at the sensation alone, pulling him closer to you so you could grab his cock, stroking him a few times.

“Fuck yes, Princess,” Changbin choked out, before lining himself up outside of your core. “I need to be inside you right now.”

“I need you inside me too, Professor,” you begged, moving your hips back and forth against his hard cock, wet squelching sounds ensuing as his cock rubbed through your slit. You threw your head back at the overwhelming sensation, moaning into his shoulder.

“Fuck, you’re gonna be the death of me,” he pulled your face up and kissed you once. Then, screwing up his eyes, he slid his entire cock into you in one harsh thrust.

“O-oh shit!” you cried, eyes widening and hands coming to grab his broad shoulders. He filled you perfectly, his girth stretching you deliciously, that vein rubbing against your walls just right. “Fuck Professor, you feel so good inside me.”

“God, you feel heavenly Princess,” he croaked, his voice hoarse. “Can I move? Please, tell me I can move.”

“Please move, now,” you gasped, fingernails digging into his back. “Don't be gentle with me, Professor. I can take it.”

“Yeah? We’ll see about that, Angel.” Before you could say anything else, he pulled all the way out, leaving you feeling incredibly empty, before thrusting back in with all his strength. 

You squealed, fingers scrambling for purchase against him, as he pounded in and out of your tight, wet pussy over and over, filthy noises filling the classroom. 

You whimpered against his neck, pressing harsh kisses against him as he thrusted in and out, balls slapping your pussy as he went harder and faster. His cock slammed against the spongy part inside of you, causing you to cry out and clench around him.

“Ah shit, Princess, ease up a bit!” he grunted, nipping your neck as his hips stuttered against yours.

“Y-you just feel so good,” you sobbed. “Please fuck me harder, don’t stop, please, Professor.”

Changbin listened, continuing to hit that sensitive spot over and over again until you were a babbling mess, unable to say anything except “Professor”.

“Fuck baby, can you stand?” Changbin demanded into your ear.

“Y-yes Professor,” you breathed, and before you could stop him, he was carrying you over to the chalkboard, and setting you down, so your face was towards the board, ass presented to him.

“Well shit, don't you look like a treat,” he whispered, slapping your ass with a calloused hand, before trapping you between his arms once more, his mouth against your neck. 

You gasped at the stinging sensation of his hand against your skin, but it wasn't fully because of the pain. Him slapping you felt good. What did you have to do for him to do it again?

His fingers traveled between your legs again, feeling the dripping wetness that gathered there. You felt him smirk against you.

“Did my Princess like it when I spanked her? Does she like it when she gets punished?”

You nodded vigorously, closing your eyes. Was he going to think you were disgusting for liking something so violent? 

Changbin started chuckling, and you glanced back at him. Did he find this funny?

“I might have underestimated you, Sweetheart,” his hands traveled up to your breasts and squeezed, making you squeal. “I guess you were right. You’re more of a whore than I thought.”

“N-no Professor, I’m a good girl,” you gasped, rubbing your ass against him as you begged for him to hit you again. “I just need you so bad, please.”

“You want me to hit you again?” Changbin snickered. “Okay, I can hit you again. Anything for my princess.”

He stepped away from you, leaving your skin cold. You missed his hulking presence warming you, his huge arms caging your body. 

You watched with wide eyes as he stepped back to his desk and picked something up. What was he doing? He couldn’t leave you hanging like this.

But when you saw what he had in his hand, you knew he very much was not leaving you hanging. He was just getting started.

“A ruler?” you said softly, staring at the wood strip in his hand. Your core pulsed at the sight, causing more arousal to slide down your thigh. Fuck, you wanted it.

“You said you wanted to get slapped, didn’t you, Princess?” he challenged.

You nodded, trying to hide your desire. If Changbin saw how much you needed this, he might deny you.

“Yes, Professor,” you responded, not moving from your position at the chalkboard.

“Good, Angel,” he approached you with a satisfied grin on his face. “So, are you ready for your test?”

“Test?!” you squeaked. You hadn’t expected that. You’d hoped he would just slap you with the ruler a few times, then fuck you silly.

“You’re going to have a math test in a few weeks, aren’t you?” He raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you want me to tutor you still?”

You nodded furiously. You would fail without him.

“Well, consider this our first session.” He came to stand behind you, running the ruler up and down your thigh a few times. 

You shivered despite yourself. You would do anything he wanted at this point.

“So, answer this problem, Princess. The axes of two right circular cylinders of radius A intersect at a right angle. Find the volume of the solid of intersection of the cylinders.”

You gasped at him, speechless. You had no idea what any of that meant. Solid of intersection? You were an English major, for god’s sake!

“I-I don’t know Professor!” you whispered, body quivering as you waited for his response.

Changbin tutted quietly, pacing back and forth behind you. You tried to watch him, but he kept going in and out of your line of sight.

“What a shame.” His voice was dangerously low. 

Suddenly, the ruler came slashing through the air, landing across the center of your ass. You let out a loud gasp, covering your mouth before you could curse or yell. 

“Chang- Professor, what the hell?” you exclaimed, whipping around to face him.

“Did that stir up any potential answers?” Changbin said smoothly, ignoring your protest. “Please turn back around, Angel. We're not done yet.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but you caught that steely look in his eyes, and obeyed. 

“Well?” he prompted. “Anything?”

“N-no, Professor,” you said meekly. “We haven’t learned anything half that difficult yet.”

This time, as the ruler made contact with your ass again, you were prepared. You bit your lip so hard it almost drew blood, but you had to admit, it felt… nice. The stinging sensation it left after the pain was gone was incredible. 

“Fine, if you can't come up with even a guess, how about this. What is the mathematical perception of the gradient said to be?”

You paused, thinking the question over. You knew Changbin had talked about this in a lesson at some point, but it had been a while ago…

“Is it tangent?” you said with a little smile. You knew the answer was wrong but… you also didn't mind.

“I’m sorry, Princess,” Changbin grinned, and the stinging pain of the ruler raced across your skin.

You let out a stifled moan, squeezing your eyes shut as hard as you could. Oh god, did Changbin hear that? He was going to think you were such a whore.

Changbin set the ruler down on his desk and slid a hand around your waist, breaths coming hard and fast against your neck. You whimpered softly, unable to look back at him. 

“I knew you liked that, you little Pain Slut,” he snarled into your ear, nipping the lobe. “You're my little Pain Slut, aren’t you?”

“Y-yes, only yours!” you exclaimed. “P-please Professor, fuck me again.”

“Mm, you're just insatiable aren’t you?” he snickered, his hand coming down onto your ass cheek, sharp and hard. “Now say thank you, Professor.”

You cried out, your core soaking wet. “Th-thank you Professor!” You forced out through the blinding pleasure.

His hand came down on your other cheek. “Again.”

“Thank you, Professor!” you moaned, turning your face to him and pressing your lips against his. 

He didn't pull away, as the hand he used to spank you wound around your leg, lifting it up so your body was still facing the chalkboard, but your lips were attached to his. 

“I’m gonna fuck you like this now, Angel, down and dirty. I’ll bet you like it like this, don't you? Seducing your poor professor, and letting him have his way with you in his classroom. That's exactly what you wanted, wasn't it?”

“No, I didn't mean to seduce you,” you mumbled against his mouth, as he positioned his hard, heavy cock outside your entrance. “You're just so hot and smart, and I wanted you so bad. But you kept rejecting me so I gave up, remember?”

“How do I know that little boyfriend wasn't just part of your plan to get me to change my mind?” Changbin challenged, finally breaking the kiss. 

“Well, if it was, it worked, didn't it?” You teased him. “Now are you going to fuck me or not?”

Changbin growled deep in his throat, thrusting his hips slowly against you, running his cock through your wet folds. “I’ll fuck you when I’m ready to fuck you, Princess. Not sure you deserve it, with all the stunts you’ve pulled. And you didn't even get that easy math problem right.”

You giggled softly. “If I get it right, will you fuck me properly? Nice and rough?”

He paused, like he was pondering the question. “Sure, Angel. What’s the right answer?”

You turned around, pressing your lips against his ear gently. You watched in satisfaction as he shivered. Thank god he was holding your leg up, or you would be numb by now. “It’s the slope,” you whispered to him, lips curling in a smile. You knew you were right.

“Mm, you knew the right answer the whole time, didnt you, Slut?” Changbin shook his head at you, a hungry glint in his eyes. “But you were a good girl, listening to your Professor so well. So I guess you get a reward.”

“Yes please, Professor.” You immediately started begging at the prospect of his cock inside of you. “Please fuck me now.”

“It takes a lot of self control to stay away from you,” Changbin groaned. “Self control that I clearly do not have.” 

This time, he thrusted into you nice and slow, one inch at a time. You gasped loudly as he shoved you up against the chalkboard, still holding your leg up, as he began pounding in and out of you mercilessly. 

“Fuck, this pussy was made for me, Angel,” he hissed into your hair, breathing deeply as he did so. “So tight and wet, squeezing me perfectly. You hear that? This pussy is all mine.”

“Yes, it’s all yours,” you wailed, fucking your hips back against his, forcing his cock to impale you to the hilt. “You feel so good inside of me, Professor.”

“Mm, hell yeah I do baby.” His huge arm wrapped all the way around your waist, trapping you entirely as he hammered in and out, the lewd sounds of his length thrusting turning you on even more.

“Fuck, Professor please touch me!” you begged, grabbing his arm that was holding your leg up and sliding it towards your clit. 

“You’re such a greedy little girl, aren’t you?” he sneered, pressing rough kisses up and down your collarbone, sucking harsh bruises along your soft skin. “I can’t deny you though, can I?”

His fingers slid over your sensitive nerves and rubbed in rushed, frantic circles as his hips pounded against yours, causing the entire chalkboard to shake and rattle. 

“O-oh yes Professor just like that,” you panted, your legs nearly failing as he turned your entire body to jelly. 

“Don't give up on me now, Princess,” Changbin warned as he spun you around and picked you up, not removing his cock from your throbbing pussy. “You don’t cum until I do, you hear?”

“Of course, Professor,” you whimpered helplessly, the new position hitting spots inside of you you hadn’t known even existed. “Please go harder!”

“Just for you, baby,” Changbin ground out, and he started bouncing you up and down on his huge length.

The vein on his cock slid against your nerves addictively as you wrapped your shaking legs around his waist, clinging to his beefy arms desperately. Your core throbbed as you tried to be a good girl and hold your orgasm back, but it was coming.

“Please Professor, let me cum!” you pleaded, pressing kisses up and down his huge pecs, sobbing into his chest. “I’m so close, I’ve been so good!”

Changbin grunted against you as he bullied his cock deeper and deeper into your cunt, hitting your g-spot over and over while you pleaded incoherently to please, please let you cum.

“Shit, okay, cum for me baby,” he hissed.

You didn't need to be asked twice. Your hips shook against him so violently you thought you were going to pass out. Stars blinked in and out of your vision as you cried, “Professor, please!” once, your pussy clenching around his cock like a vice, as he pounded his cock infinitely faster. His fingers pressed against your clit, and you were done for. You exploded around him in a puddle of whimpers and moans, clutching onto him for dear life.

“Holy shit baby, you’re so fucking hot,” Changbin panted, squeezing his eyes shut, his thrusts becoming more jerky and unstable. “I’m so fuckin’ close, Princess, gonna cum inside that slutty little pussy of yours, yeah?”

“Oh fuck, please give me your cum Professor!” you begged, moving your hips in time with his. “Want you to breed me like the good girl I am!”

“Fuck Angel, you really want it?” Changbin hissed, his hips stuttering as his lips smashed up against yours again. “You wanna feel my hot cum inside you?”

“Yes Professor, please, I need it,” you breathed against his mouth, biting his bottom lip and sucking it into your mouth. 

Changbin thrusted sloppily in and out a few more times, his breaths stilted and hoarse, before halting entirely inside of you. You felt his warm cum fill your pussy, ropes and ropes of hot, sticky liquid, and you let out a shaky moan, closing your eyes at the sensation.

As he was about to put you down and pull out, you shook your head, gripping his arms.

“P-please, stay inside.” Your legs tightened around his waist. His softening cock felt so good, keeping his warm cum inside you. You didn’t want him to let go, not yet.

“You like me cockwarming you, Princess?” Changbin’s cock stiffened at your actions, and you nodded.

“You feel so good inside of me,” you sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“I bet I do,” he said cockily, and you slapped his arm.

“Way to ruin the moment, Changbin,” you glared.

He laughed, finally letting go of you and setting you back on the ground. 

“I'm kidding, baby.” He pressed his lips against yours, much more tender this time. You melted against him, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him close. 

“I like the confidence.” You giggled against his lips, before breaking apart. “I should probably go. I've got another class in an hour, and I don’t want to walk in looking like this.”

“I wouldn't want that either,” Changbin observed. “You might get dress-coded. Or arrested.”

When you were both dressed and semi-cleaned up, you waved goodbye to Changbin.

Changbin waved back, a little smirk on that handsome face of his. 

“So, we on for another study session tonight?”

You smirked, biting your bottom lip before replying: “Yes, Professor.”

laska's note — wow, this one shot took me forever to finally finish! but i wanted it to be perfect you y'all, so i spent a long time figuring out the plot and exactly how i wanted everything to go. i really hope you enjoyed it, because i'm kinda proud of how this turned out. i'm sorry for the slow ass updates, but again it's just supposed to be for fun! hopefully i'll get some more content out soon. leave any comments about what you liked, i love reading them! until next time... 😏💋

#stray kids #skz stay #skz smut #skz imagines #skz x reader #skz female oc #skz scenarios #skz oneshots #skz x female reader #skz #stray kids smut #changbin x reader #seo changbin #changbin smau #changbin x female reader #changbin smut #skz changbin

[lilacmingi]

IRRESISTIBLE

My works are 14+ ONLY. If you’re under 14 DO NOT interact with me or any of my works

Pairing: Changbin x fem reader

Word count: 850

Note: Reader sees Changbin shirtless for the first time. Also yeah maybe this one was a little self-indulgent because I haven’t been able to find any scenarios like this one so I wrote one of my own 😤

The gentle, muffled sounds of the shower filled the room as you laid on the bed, beginning to doze off. The sounds of the water coming from the bathroom relaxed you, your eyelids beginning to droop slightly in response to the soothing sound. You could feel yourself slowly beginning to doze off, but just before you could, you heard the shower turn off. The sudden silence causing you to stir, your eyes snapping open.

The door to the bathroom was pulled open and out walked Changbin, clouds of steam streaming out of the washroom as they escaped the small space. His jet black hair was wet, only a few lone strands sticking to his forehead and he wasn't wearing a shirt, just a pair of black basketball shorts.

Your jaw went slack as you stared at his broad, bare back. This was the first time you'd seen Changbin without a top. You've ogled at him plenty of times, watching how his shirts cling to his buff figure and stretch across his large chest, but this was different. This time, there wasn't a piece of fabric covering his incredible physique. It was all on display for you to see.

His shoulders were so wide, his thick, sturdy arms flexing as he rummaged through one of the dresser drawers. You swallowed as you practically gawked at him, drinking him in and savoring the moment—until he turned around, that is.

You were quick to close your eyes and pretend to be asleep but Changbin knew better. His amused chuckles reached your ears, causing you to peel one eye open.

"I know you're not asleep, Y/n."

You gave up your act as he approached you with that signature sideways smirk of his plastered on his face. Your attention was quickly drawn to his exposed chest and abdomen causing you to pull your bottom lip between your teeth. Changbin's main focus when working out was his arms and chest and boy did it pay off.

In addition to never seeing him shirtless that meant you hadn't seen his stomach either. Paired with his impressively large biceps and pecs was a soft-looking tummy, the sight making your heart flip. You'd always assumed Changbin was what you'd call "soft buff" which was someone who was extremely built in the chest and arm department but still managed to have a little tummy and you loved that. Seeing the image in front of you was so much better than anything you could've imagined.

Changbin crawled on the bed licking his lips as he hovered over you.

"Like what you see?"

Your cheeks were immediately set aflame as you averted your gaze out of embarrassment. Changbin's index finger and thumb were placed delicately on your chin, turning your head to face him.

"Hi, pretty."

You swallowed thickly, the temperature in your cheeks rising exponentially.

"Don't get all shy now. Not after you were shamelessly checking me out." He smirked, leaning in closer.

You could only let out a small squeak that sounded too much like a whimper, which only fueled Changbin's confidence. You were like putty in his hands. He leaned in slowly, pressing his lips to yours for just a moment, which seemed to successfully pull you out of your trance.

"Do you know attractive you are?" You murmured, still in a slight haze, allowing your hands to plant themselves on his shoulders.

"I think have an idea." He grinned, leaning down to latch his plush lips onto yours once again, the feeling making every inch of your body heat up.

Changbin's confidence was one of the many things you found so attractive about him. He was always going around flaunting his gigantic biceps, flexing them for Stay and looking at his arms in the mirror only to praise himself and talk about how handsome he looked. The fact that he was aware of how good-looking he was and wasn't afraid to audibly compliment himself was so sexy.

Changbin's warm lips wrapped around your bottom one, applying the slightest bit of suction that had you melting underneath him. Your fingers curled around his shoulders, nails unconsciously digging into his flesh as you released an involuntary sigh, too caught up in the moment to control your actions.

Changbin grunted at the pressure of your nails, but didn't mind it all that much as he continued to ravish your lips with feverish kisses and tiny bites.

He lowered himself down, diminishing the space between your bodies until his bare torso was flush against you, his lips not once leaving yours. You slipped your arms around his little waist and started sliding your palms up and down his broad back, occasionally digging your nails into his skin when you felt yourself becoming engrossed in the kiss.

Changbin pulled away for a moment, gazing down at you with droopy half-lidded eyes. His tongue darted out to lick his lips as that little sideways smirk of his made an appearance.

"If I knew you'd react this way to seeing me shirtless I would've done it a long time ago."

Masterlist ᝰ — enjoyed this imagine? reblogs & comments are very much appreciated!

DO NOT steal, plagiarize, copy, repost, alter, or translate my works in any way

🏷 @h3arteyes4mingi @weird-bookworm @poppy2007 @parkjennykim @evidive

#changbin x reader #changbin x you #changbin x y/n #stray kids drabbles #stray kids imagines #seo changbin #seo changbin x reader #seo changbin x you #seo changbin x y/n #changbin drabbles #changbin oneshot #seo changbin drabbles #kpop drabbles #kpop oneshots

[minhosimthings]

Rodeo Ride

Symphony Smut Series Day 9: Lah Pat and Flo Milli's Like a Rodeo Ride

Lyric: He love how I ride it, hop on a dick I made him get excited

Pairings: Husband!Changbin × wife!fem!reader

Warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI, thigh riding, sub!reader, hard!dom!Changbin, office sex, sex on a chair, missionary, rough sex, swearing, dirty talk, dry humping, needy reader, VERY sex deprived reader, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it)

A/N: day 9! Woah we're almost halfway through this series now and I'm finally doing Binnie. I really couldn't think of anyone better for riding that Changbin for some reason

THE SYMPHONY SMUT SERIES MASTERLIST

Changbin was a simple man.

Wake up, get dressed, kiss your amazing wife goodbye, get to work, do said work, come back, kiss wife again, and then cuddle with her until the morning and you gotta repeat it again. And he liked this life. What else does he have to ask for?

And yet, men never understand the workings of women's sexual systems do they?

"Bunny I'm going to be late today." Changbin looked up at you sitting opposite to him, hastily arranging his tie as the maids took away his plate.

"Again?" You slammed your fork down, glaring at him. It wasn't that you didn't love your husband enough to let him go to work and make his decisions, but sometimes your pussy needed some food.

"I know, I know." Changbin chuckled, an awkward attempt to ease your tension, "But I've got to. Got a meeting today, I can't let the employees be alone without their boss now can I?"

"But Binnie...." You drawled out, making your lips onto a pout which you knew could never make him say no to you.

"How about this?" Changbin leant over to you, caressing your lip with his finger, before pulling you in for a short yet sweet kiss, "Stay awake till I come back, and I'll fuck a baby into you."

"Tempting." You said, folding your arms, "You promise?"

"Promise." Changbin replied, before quickly scampering off to his car, leaving you all alone, once again in the mansion.

"How much longer, how much longer." That's what went in your mind till about three o'clock. Waiting for Changbin really was a task, as the minutes ticks painfully away, it felt like eternity.

This was a punishment, you were convinced, whatever you had done in your past life to deserve this, you were regretting it. Were you being dramatic? Maybe. But we're you going to stop? Absolutely not.

And that is the story of how you turned up at Changbin's office building, wearing a furry black coat which reached down to your ankles, with nothing inside. Well almost nothing, you thought, as you looked down at the lingerie set Changbin had gotten you for your fifth anniversary.

Smirking to yourself, you entered the elevator and pressed the cold button upto Changbin's office, on the topmost floor.

Oh he was going to have fun today.

"Bunny? What are you doing here?" Changbin's eyes lifted from his paperwork as you entered his office, quite a large space, "And why are you closing my curtain blinds?" His last words were ended with a smirk to his face, casually sliding his wheely chair away from his desk.

"I miss you Bin." You say, the sound of your heels clacking the floor as you slowly approach him like a snow leopard approaching it's prey, "I really miss you."

Changbin's words caught in his throat, as his eyes lay sight on you.

Oh he was fucked.

He began to regret all his work now, how he had left his pure baby all alone with no dick to fullfill her sweet pussy.

"Come 'ere." Changbin pulled you into his lap, taking the fur coat and throwing it aside, "It's good you came during lunch hour, otherwise I would have been dead by now."

Your ass was rubbing against his hard dick, making him having to stifle his moans. The same ass that's been nudging against him for the past five years. "God I've missed this" he thought to himself.

He lightly grabbed onto your hips and moved his against your ass. "S-shit.." he sighed, the slight friction easing some of the pain. He moved again, pressing into you a little harder, letting out a shaky moan and burying his face in the crook of your neck. 

The slow movements gradually got faster, the slow grinding turned into him rutting against you, like a dog in heat. All of this movement caused you stir, halting Changbin's movements. Making sure you were still there and this was no his imagination, he started moving his hips again, slowly.

The friction wasn't enough though, he wanted more, he needed more. He pulled his pants and boxers down, or at least enough for his dick to spring out and breathe. Thank god for his desk having a barrier.

The cold air hit his tip causing him to shiver and stifle a moan. Pulling you close and stroking himself, spreading his pre-cum, he pushed himself between your thighs. He knew it was weird, to grind and hump on you while you were in his office, but fully fucking you didn't make him feel better, your thighs will suffice for this one time. 

Thrusting his hips he let out a moan,a little too loud that he had to remind himself the walls could listen, he bit his lip trying to silence himself.

"Ahh fuck darling you're so good for me" he moaned, feeling your pussy rub against his dick.

Dipping his head in the crook of your neck he let out an airy breath and kissed your shoulders, hips thrusting faster and balls slapping against the back of his thighs. 

Whining and huffing in your ear, kissing and nipping at your neck, he was getting closer and closer to cumming all over your thighs. Changbin grabbed your thighs, squeezing them tightly, tight enough it might even leave a mark. His hips began to stutter and his hands gripped your thighs and hip while he bit his lip, hard enough to cause it to bleed and pushing his head further into your neck. 

His dick twitched and he could feel his cum in his stomach when-

"Bunny why'd you stop?" Changbin looked up at you with widened eyes, disappointment filling him, "Do you wanna be a bad girl today?"

"Hmm maybe" you said, giggling and slipping a hand onto his dick, gently stroking it, making Changbin moan again.

“ Get on my thigh.” He orders you, pulling your panties down, leaving you in naked. He groans at the glistening wetness staining your thighs before placing his thigh in between your legs.

“Sit.”

The moment your pussy makes contact with his bare thigh he can’t help but groan. “Soaking my thigh already, who knew you were this desperate?” He mutters, your head falling into his neck as your hips begin to move.

The drag of your clit against his muscular thigh causes you to whimper, pressing yourself harder. His large calloused hands guide your hips, moving you up and down his thigh.

“That’s it bunny, doesn’t it feel good?” He questions, pressing a kiss to your forehead. You can’t seem to find the words to respond, overwhelmed by pleasure. You nod dumbly, moaning out his name as he tenses his thigh.

“Who would’ve thought I could fuck you dumb without putting my cock in you? Just so needy for me.” Changbin brushes some hair behind your hair, holding your face to look at him whilst he smiles sarcastically.

"Bunny, my pants are fuckin soaked" he said, eyeing the huge wet spot that were creating, "Such a filthy little slut riding my thigh like that"

His eyes scan your face, admiring the light flush smattered over your cheeks and the way your eyelids flutter shut with every grind against him.

“Want you to cum, can you do that? Cum on my thigh and then I’ll fuck you senseless right here bunny.” He groans, your arousal audible now with each drag. Your legs begin to shake with exertion, Changbin taking over and continuing to grind you into his thigh, muscles tensing sporadically.

Your orgasm takes you by surprise despite the build up, head thrown back with a moan and eyes rolled back. “Oh god, Bin, please.” You moan out, not sure if you’re begging him to stop or keep going.

“There we go, good girl.” Changbin groans, his thigh absolutely covered in you. He holds you still, allowing you to catch your breath. Changbin places a soft kiss on your cheek, leading you to look into his eyes, pupils clouded with lust. He smirks.

“is everything oka—“ his lips suddenly crash into you. Fingers firmly holding your jaw as his tongue slips into your mouth. you’re completely caught off guard, hands holding his wrists, whining as he pushes you against the desk, arm wrapping around your waist pressing you firmly into his chest.

“I need you,” he groans, aggressively, pre cum leaking out of the tip as he kisses your lips. “don't wanna be away from you.” he bites your bottom lip, causing your voice to crack, whining.

“I trained this pussy so well,” he groans, kissing your lips. “ya get so wet just from kissin’ me,” he smiles, knees kicking your legs further apart as you whine, trying to hold his shoulders for balance.

“fuck bunny” his fingers pushed into your pussy, your walls sucking him as you let out a strangled moan, the squelching wasn’t helping you either. " have something to say?” he snaps, sucking bruises along your neck and shoulder as he pumps his thick fingers in your pussy, proud of himself as he hears the squelching start to trickle down his fingers.

“Bin—“ you’re biting your hand, muffling your moans as your face heats up. So embarrassed that this is happening and you couldn’t even push him away.

“did I cover your mouth?” his words echo as he pins your wrist over your head. “you like talking, so lemme hear you.”

“no—ah ah…they’ll hear me—“ your desperately trying to keep some dignity, but it all leaves the moment you feel your body being lifting in the air.

“Fuck me Bin!,” and that’s all he wants because he’s dropping you down, shoving his entire dick inside until your eyes burst with tears feeling his thick trimmed hair tickling your clit, completely bottoming out.

“fucking took out my eardrums, Bunny,” he’s laughing in your face as he pulls his hips back and shoves his cock inside you again. you were completely dazed, that moment he sank his full length deep in your tummy, your brain automatically turned to mush. he usually took his time when it’s the morning before office, but there was no time now. so he couldn’t hold himself back as he let you take it full force.

“Bin…I-I need you please.” your eyes were filled with tears as you held his hair, fingers rubbing against his scalp, the other digging into his shoulders as you drooled. Such a mess in such a small time.

“mhm? ahh— mm fuck!” he grips your ass, fucking you faster as he feels his balls tighten. You’re drooling into his lips as he opens his mouth, sticking his tongue out, groaning as he feels your spit rub inside his mouth. such a filthy girl. you were creaming so fast, squeezing the hell out of his cock as your eyes grew.

“too much…ahhh—wait!” The desk was shaking as he drove his cock, balls slapping your wet pussy as your legs shook.

You almost screamed as you let go, cum shaping around his dick perfectly, as he slowed down, his chest rising up and down.

Pulling out of you slowly, he quickly got some towels and cleaned you up, guiding you towards the office's bathroom.

"I got some clothes in the second drawer." He set you down on the counter, "I'll come home early today alright?"

"Your pussy isn't done yet."

Taglist: @ramenoil @mynameisniya150 @demigodmahash + whoever wants to be tagged, send an ask my way!

#seo changbin #changbin smut #changbin #changbin skz #changbin hard thoughts #changbin hard hours #skz smut #changbin smut drabbles #changbin smut oneshot #changbin × reader #seo changbin stray kids #seo changbin smut #seo changbin scenarios #seo changbin × reader #stray kids smut #stray kids smut imagines #stray kids scenarios #skz smut imagines #skz smut drabble #skz hard thoughts #skz hard hours #stray kids hard thoughts #stray kids hard hours #skz × reader #stray kids × reader

[fantastic-bby]

Love is a Waiting Game

Pairing: Ryujin x Changbin, OC x Changbin

Word count: 37k

Genre: Romance | Fluff | Angst | Slice of Life | Bittersweet | College AU

Seo Changbin has a bit of an odd life. He finds himself waiting quite a lot. Especially when he’s faced with Shin Ryujin, a shy woman with a love for bomber jackets and her eccentric group of friends who always seem to find a way to put her in strange situations.  But Changbin finds himself realising that there’s nothing that makes him wait more than love when he tries to get closer to Ryujin, who’s still struggling to find herself but also can’t seem to resist his advances.

Tags + Warnings: Mentions of blood | Mentions of corpses | Past gang involvement | Violence | Marijuana usage | Alcohol usage | Themes of sexuality/asexuality | A bit of insecurity surrounding the topic of that

Masterlist | Ao3 Link

Adventures of Campus Masterlist

i.

Changbin’s head jerks backwards when he falls too much to the front, his hands scrambling across the table and accidentally scrunching up the many sheets of paper in front of him as he tries to stabilise. He looks around the room with his eyes narrowed and his eyebrows furrowed.

Chan is fast asleep in his swivel chair, baby blue neck pillow protecting his head from swinging too far to the side while Raisha is passed out on the music studio’s couch with a fuzzy green blanket draped over her. 

Changbin runs a hand over his face in an attempt to wake himself up and as he tries to remember why the hell he’s in the music studio at—he checks his watch—why the fuck is it five a.m.?! He lets out a small groan and leans back in his chair. 

His muscles are fucking killing him. Why did he agree to overnight at the studio in the first place?! 

Chan and Raisha aren’t even awake when they’re the whole reason Changbin’s here in the first place. Chan thought it would be a ‘fun idea’ to pull an all nighter at the studio to try and finish a song they had been working on in the past two months or so. Raisha is honestly just there as moral support since she isn’t directly involved with the technicality of music, but she’s there to lend them her dark green bass whenever they need it. 

Changbin lets out a soft sigh as he turns back to his laptop screen to see Logic Pro opened up with the few tracks that they had recorded. It’s not a lot, but the three of them were proud of how much they managed to get since most of what Chan had to do was splice and repeat the tracks. 

God, they’re not even doing this professionally, but Changbin thinks that this is one of the most exhausting processes that he’s ever put himself through. Despite that, he’d still gladly choose to do it willingly. He thinks that the process of making music is more tiring than rugby and he’s broken three of his limbs playing rugby. 

“Oh fuck!” Raisha exclaims when she accidentally rolls off of the couch and lands on the floor with a thud, the sound scaring Chan awake and causing him to fall out of his chair as well. Changbin turns around to see them looking around in confusion as they try to take in their surroundings. 

“Fucking hell,” Chan groans, “I thought I was dreaming when I remembered I was still here.” He climbs back onto his chair and screams into his hands when they cover his face at the realisation that the three of them are still in the studio.  He lets out a loud sigh, sucking in his breath through his teeth right after as he stares at his own DAW on his PC. “Come on, I just need one sound in this to make it better.” 

“Chan, we’ve been at this for hours. How much longer are you going to stare at the screen until you get an idea?” Raisha whines softly and buries her face into her pillow as she lays on the carpeted ground without making much of an effort to climb back onto the couch. 

“It’s just one more, Sha,”  he whines as well. 

“Dude, you said ‘one more’ four adlibs ago,” Changbin sighs. “And that was seven fucking hours ago!”

“Hmmm, four adlibs in the span of seven hours… I wonder if it’ll take another two for you guys to figure out another one,” Raisha jokes. 

“Can we sleep first and then finish the song?” he suggests, turning to Chan with hopeful eyes, but the producer’s already closed his eyes. 

Only for them to snap back open upon hearing Raisha calling his name. 

“Yeah, yeah, sure,” Chan yawns. “I don’t think I can think of anything else to add to this song yet.”

“We can just get back to this later when we’ve had dinner and we’ve slept,” Raisha hums and returns to her spot on the couch, head flush against the soft cushion that she purposefully leaves in the studio for whenever Chan decides an all nighter is a good idea. 

“You mean ‘breakfast’,” Changbin corrects her lazily. 

“Yeah, whatever,” she grumbles and closes her eyes. Chan looks at her with a fond smile before he reclines his chair the furthest it can go and lays down. He grabs the blanket laying on the floor and drapes it over himself, making himself comfortable before he closes his eyes. 

Changbin looks between the two and sighs as he turns back to the sheets of lyrics on his table. Something’s suddenly bugging his thoughts and he finds himself not sleepy at all. 

“If you can’t sleep, just take some of the sleeping pills from my bag,” Chan mumbles, making Changbin turn to look at him. “I always carry a few around with me.” 

“Thanks, but it’s fine,” he shakes his head. 

“Suit yourself.”

Changbin turns back to his laptop, pen tapping against his arm as he stares at the program. Sometimes, his creative block is so big that he could be staring at his screen or his lyrics for weeks before he’s able to write something that sounds good enough for him. 

He glances at Chan and the way he’s already knocked out. 

Surprising, Changbin thinks. 

Chan is someone that Changbin’s known for the past few months. They’re both part of the music club, but they’re also the ones that are camped in the music studio since Chan had basically planted his PC in there and claimed it as his own. Which no one really minds because no one else seems to want to use the studio when they could make use of their own rooms. 

Chan, however, decided that the music studio is his room now. He’s spent the past two years producing and perfecting his skill in mastering his own music. So when Changbin had joined the music club, it was just their luck that he had a knack for writing lyrics that have the power to melt hearts. 

Raisha, on the other hand, isn’t a producer nor does she master music in her free time. She does, however, slap the bass like she was specifically born to and Chan had fallen head over heels for her sweet and kind personality when she joined a band for a one-time performance and blew everyone’s minds. While he wasn't part of the band, he ended up spending a lot of time with her when she was in the jamming room with the rest of the band and they ended up spending more time together camped in the studio until the early hours of the morning. 

The main reason that Changbin finds Chan passing out so easily surprising is that Chan’s insomnia is, to quote him directly, ‘a blessing and a curse’. Whenever he can’t sleep, he’s usually hit with a wave of inspiration that has him playing around with his 25-key MIDI keyboard and shitting out half of a song as though it’s such an everyday thing. Other times, Chan’s insomnia only gives him and everyone around him one of the worst headaches of his life, but Changbin usually tries to stay as understanding as possible. 

Until Chan’s therapist started prescribing him sleeping pills that he, willingly, refuses to take because he claims that they block his creative process. To which, Changbin doesn’t argue because Chan’s mental health can be a bit of a finicky thing to work with. 

Raisha’s sleeping schedule is only slightly worse than Chan’s only because she happily chooses to stay awake until the ass crack of dawn for the sake of keeping them company whenever they’re working on songs. Chan had tried, at first, to get her to sleep whenever he saw hours and hours of work ahead of him, but every time Raisha sweetly told him ‘no’ and Chan practically fell to his knees for her. 

Changbin is pretty sure that they’re in love with each other, but if you were to ask the both of them, Raisha would politely shake her head while Chan would turn into a blushing mess while sputtering anything to deny it. But Changbin once caught them staring at each other for a few seconds longer than what’s considered normal and he concluded that if they didn’t realise it, then someone would definitely tell them. 

Either way, Changbin’s pleased with his situation now. He loves his friends, he loves music, and he loves rugby; all of which surrounds him constantly and keeps his blood and brain moving at a rate he’s happy with. He genuinely feels like he isn’t exactly missing anything. 

The only problem is that Raisha, Chan, and Changbin are in a spot where they feel… somewhat incomplete. Their dynamic is fantastic and their synergy when making music is honestly something otherworldly, but they three of them have spoken about it before and it feels like they’re just missing something; or someone that could help their music process move a bit faster and smoother. 

But for now, Changbin’s more than happy to work with just Chan and Raisha because he’s comfortable with them. It didn’t feel like a chore trying to get to know either of them since it seemed to happen so naturally. It also doesn’t help that they both act like a happy wife with her very disgruntled husband, so it honestly felt like Changbin was adopted by the both of them… which makes him wonder how they both don’t realise how ‘in love’ with each other they are. 

He lets out a small sigh as he crumples up another sheet of paper and tosses it into the, almost, full metal waste bin right underneath the white desk. Changbin leans his head onto the table and shuts his eyes. All he needs is writing material and then he can let himself sleep. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“I feel like shit,” Chan claims, voice coming out as a mumble and his head almost hanging forward and smashing into his place of rice. 

“The new semester is starting soon—maybe we can get new guys to come in and work with you,” Raisha suggests right before she sticks a spoonful of the noodles into her mouth. “You never know how talented they can be,” she shrugs once she’s done swallowing. 

“That doesn’t seem so bad,” Changbin hums. He had finished his place of chicken chop way before, but he’s also always had a habit of eating faster than both Chan and Raisha.

“The new kids are all extremely scared of us because we’re their seniors and we actually work on music,” Chan points out. “It doesn’t matter how many times we try encouraging them to hang out, the only ones that do are the second and final years.” 

“You think we could just kidnap some of them and drag them into the music room at midnight?” he jokes. 

“Changbin,” Raisha scolds while shooting him a glare. 

“It’s really not a bad idea,” Chan laughs. He shrinks when he sees the same glare from her being directed at him instead, making Changbin laugh to himself. 

“Or would you rather we wait for someone to approach us instead?” Raisha suggests. “None of the other music club members or the committee actually use the music room since they know that Chan pretty much lives there and the only people that use the jamming room are me and some of the band kids.” 

“The band kids camp in the jamming room at every chance they get. There was a really weird agreement that we had, but because I’m always in there, no one seems to want to intrude on the studio part of the room.” 

“Channie, you practically live in the studio. The first time Changbin came in, he agreed that it felt like he was going into your bedroom,” she deadpans. 

He stares at her for a moment before his cheeks redden and he looks at his food, the grains of rice suddenly becoming so interesting to him.

“It’s not like we ever leave the room at night, anyway. Maybe, if we’re lucky, someone would come to the room and ask to hang out,” Changbin says with a shrug. 

“Can we just hope?” 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

ii.

Changbin finds himself crashed on the floor of the music studio once again. He feels like his head is going to fucking explode while Chan lays beside him, the both of them staring at the white ceiling blanky. 

“What the fuck are we supposed to do?” Changbin mumbles. 

“I don’t know,” Chan sighs. 

“You guys could always, you know, take a break,” Raisha suggests from her spot on the couch, her eyes glued to her iPad perched on her knees as she plays a rhythm game on it. 

“Isn’t that what we’re doing right now?” Changbin laughs tiredly, the sound coming out breathless and almost hoarse because the three of them don’t know how to stay hydrated or keep each other hydrated. 

“You guys are staring at the ceiling while trying to think about how to make the song better. That’s not resting,” she mumbles absentmindedly while keeping her focus on her game. “Yes!” Raisha finally puts the iPad away when she finishes the map and looks at the two men, “now, if you guys really want to take a break, you guys can just walk around campus instead—smoke a little just to clear your heads. Maybe I’ll think of something, too.” 

“A smoke break sounds amazing,” Chan groans as he sits upright with Changbin mimicking his movements. “Oh fuck, wait—I can’t smoke. I’m going home tomorrow and I can’t have the stench of cigs on me.” 

“Back to staring at the ceiling it is,” Changbin sighs and lays back down. 

Raisha’s elbow rests on her knee, her chin perched on her palm as she stares at them. 

“Then? You guys just want to rot in here?” 

“What else are we supposed to do? Chan can’t smoke and it’s five a.m.,” Changbin grumbles. 

“Nothing’s open and I don’t want to use my truck tonight because I have to save up on the gas for tomorrow,” Chan adds. “I’d also rather not walk around the campus at three a.m. sober.” 

“And no one’s having any parties because the semester just started,” he sighs. 

“I feel like I’m watching a sped up version of that bouncing DVD logo bouncing off of the sides of the screen, only, the walls are you two and the DVD logo is negativity,” Raisha teases. “Can’t you guys think of anything positive?” 

The two of them look at each other for a moment before shaking their heads at the same time, with the same exact movement. 

“Stare at the ceiling and rot, is it then,” she chuckles and slides onto the floor right beside Chan, laying down beside him as she stares at the ceiling as well. 

“Do you think… if I add more piano… would it sound better?” Chan asks suddenly. 

“What kind of piano are we talking about?” Changbin questions without turning his head. 

“EDM piano?”

“Dude…” 

“Less EDM, more heavy bass,” Raisha states. 

“That’s easy for you to say. You’re a bassist,” Chan snorts. 

“Bass is a natural sound for me,” she hums. 

The conversation fizzles out as the three of them simply stare at the ceiling without a single thought in any of their heads. Surprisingly, Changbin can actually feel his muscles starting to relax the longer he stares at the ceiling as it starts to become more and more hypnotising. 

Until he hears snoring come from beside him. 

Changbin’s head whips to his right and he sees Chan fast asleep with Raisha cuddled up by his side. His eyes narrow before he sighs and returns to staring at the ceiling. There’s something peaceful about the silence that fills the room and surrounds him, the only sound in the room being the whirring of the air con and the occasional creak of the table. 

And then the door knocks. 

Who the hell is knocking at the door at five fucking a.m.?!

Changbin rises from his spot and he stares at the door, wondering if he’s going crazy. It knocks again and that’s all the confirmation he needs to know that there must be someone on the other side, making him stand up from the floor and run a hand through his hair as he makes his way towards the white wooden door. 

He swings it open and it reveals a guy standing there in a black hoodie, his hands stuffed into the front pocket of it with a guitar bag hanging from his back.

“Dude, it’s five a.m.,” Changbin states.

“Yeah, I know, but I’m like… really fucking high right now, man, and I just wanna shred.” The guy’s voice slurs, words mumbled and jumbled together as he stares at Changbin with bloodshot, half-lidded eyes. He eyes the guy up and down for a moment before letting him in. 

The moment he walks past Changbin, he’s hit with the strong mixture of cologne and the musky, earthy smell of weed that makes him stumble backwards and almost choke from how strong it is. 

“The jamming room’s the second door to your left,” he mumbles while pointing towards the door. “The recording studio’s straight ahead, but my friends are pretty knocked out, so you won’t get much entertainment out of being in there.” 

Changbin’s always loved the way the music room was laid out. It felt like a professional music studio with a jamming room to the left and the office straight down the hallway that they just called the recording studio since the actual recording booth was connected to the room with a glass separating the two rooms to show the inside of it. 

“It’s fine. I’m just here for the amp,” the guy claims as he makes a beeline towards the jamming studio.

Changbin watches him through the window that looks into the jamming studio, but decides not to linger any longer and makes his way back into the recording room where Chan’s eyes are fluttering open. Raisha had, presumably, rolled away from him a few minutes prior, which is why her back is now facing Chan. 

“Did someone just come in?” Chan asks, sleep lacing his voice.

“Yeah, some guy with a guitar. He said he was high, so I just let him in since he said he just wants to use the jamming studio,” Changbin explains softly in an attempt to not wake Raisha up from how soundly she’s sleeping. 

“I keep forgetting that there are people on campus who don’t want to disturb their neighbours,” he chuckles. 

Changbin opens his mouth to say something only to be interrupted by the sound of a guitar solo ripping into the room. His eyes widen and his jaw drops just as Chan does the same, the both of them staring at each other in shock as the solo goes on for the next few minutes. 

“What the fuck?” Changbin scrambles to his feet to rush out of the room. 

“Is that the guy?” Chan joins his side as they both watch the guy from before shred on his guitar with his eyes closed, his fingers moving along the fretboard so naturally and so easily that it practically mesmerises the two. “Holy shit,” he breathes out in awe, his eyes glued on the way this guy leans back every once in a while when he bends the strings. “And you said he was high?” 

“Chan, if he’s this good high, then I don’t know what the fuck kind of God he is when he’s sober,” Changbin mutters in disbelief. 

The two of them stand there, complete in awe with the guitarist and unaware of when Raisha seems to join them upon hearing the guitar. 

“Woah,” she gasps, eyes snapping wide open when she sees just how effortlessly the guy plays. 

“I know right.” 

“Who is he? And why is he here in the middle of the night?” 

“He said he’s really high and just really wants to use the amp, so I let him in,” Changbin explains, but he’s almost completely unaware of the fact that Raisha’s just woken up and is standing beside him. He’s, honestly, just answering a question that was thrown into the air. 

“He’s amazing,” Chan breathes. “How is he so good?” 

“I don’t even think he realises we’re here,” Raisha chuckles. 

As if on cue, the guy stops playing and his eyes snap open the moment she speaks, making direct eye contact with all of them. He blinks a few times, but it takes a while before he seems to process what’s happening and watches as the three of them allow themselves into the jamming studio. 

“Where the hell did you come from?” Chan laughs the moment they’re inside. 

“I grew up in Incheon,” the guy states. “That’s… good to know. I meant, where did you learn how to play the guitar that well?” 

“Oh, sorry… words aren’t translating to me right now,” he chuckles while wiping his forehead with his index and thumb. “I started playing when I was nine or ten… so I’ve been playing the guitar for ten years… I think. I can’t remember how long it’s actually been. But it’s fun for me and it feels nice. In my body.”

“Dude, you’re amazing,” Changbin claims with a laugh. “We’ve never heard anyone play that well before.” 

“I would be way more thankful if I wasn’t high out of my mind, but thank you,” the guy laughs. 

“I’m Changbin—by the way. This is Chan,” he jerks his thumb in Chan’s direction, “he produces music. This is Raisha,” he turns to Raisha who smiles and nods, “she’s our bassist. We’re in an unofficial kind of music group.” 

“That sounds so fucking cool,” he slurs with a lazy chuckle. “I’m Jisung, but my friends call me Han when I play because they think it’s cool if I performed with a stage name. A lot of people call me ‘Ji’ or ‘Sung’, so just choose whatever floats your boat.” 

“Y-You perform?” Raisha repeats. 

“Yeah, I have major insane social anxiety, though, so I’m usually playing on stage when I’m high.” 

“That’s completely fair. I agree with that logic,” Chan chuckles. 

“It’s a coping mechanism,” Jisung claims softly as he smiles. “Oh, wait, if you guys are down for it—” He sticks his hand into the pocket of his hoodie and pulls out a metal casing that he holds out towards them. 

Changbin eyes the casing, hesitating for a moment before he takes the case from Jisung. Chan and Raisha watch from over his shoulder as he pulls the metal casing open to reveal another six rolled blunts on the inside of it, the smell of weed practically exploding into the air of the jamming studio. 

“Holy shit,” Raisha laughs when she sees the blunts. 

“I rolled them myself yesterday,” Jisung giggles proudly when he sees the look on all of their faces. “I got the weed from a friend of mine out of town. We meet up almost every month so I always have a fresh stash.” 

“Fuck not smoking cigarettes—I’ll just burn these clothes before I head home,” Chan laughs as he pulls one of the blunts out of the case.

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“This is better than staring at the ceiling,” Changbin chuckles. Raisha had come up with the wonderful idea of Chan driving the four of them out of campus and to the abandoned parking lot a few minutes up campus where it overlooks the entire city, and with the newly discovered set of blunts, Chan just couldn’t resist the idea of getting high in the parking lot and watching the sunset—especially with the way Raisha was fluttering her pretty eyes at him.  

The musky odour of the weed surrounds them as they hotbox his truck, smoke completely filling the entire car and making the outside world almost invisible to them; especially in the state they’re in. 

“I would take this over masking the smell of cigarettes from my family anyday,” Chan chuckles lazily. He takes a particularly long drag from his blunt, the end of it glowing red, before he throws his head back against the driver’s seat and blows out the smoke with a content sigh as he passes the thin, brown roll to Raisha. 

“You guys are cool as hell,” Jisung hums. “All I wanted tonight was to shred on my guitar and then pass out in my room, but this is way better.”

“Seconded,” Raisha giggles right before she takes a drag. “Are you new, Jisung?”

“This is my first year,” he nods. 

“What course are you taking?”

Jisung opens his mouth to speak, but quickly cuts himself off. 

“You know what? I don’t remember,” he laughs. 

“I don’t remember mine either, so you get a pass,” Changbin laughs. 

They’ve really only spent the past hour or so with Jisung, but there’s something so special about this guy that has them all watching him with so much adoration. He reminds them of a very excited puppy with so much life in his eyes that’s clouded with so much fucking weed that they find it even more adorable. 

“Do you want to start hanging around the music club more often? Chan and I barely leave the studio, so you could come in at the same time every night and we’ll most likely be working on music,” he chuckles. 

“Only at night?” Jisung glances at him with an eyebrow raised. 

“I’m in the rugby team, so I usually spend my days on the field.” 

“How was I not expecting that?” he laughs. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Changbin scoffs, laughing as he turns to look at Jisung who only shakes his head, barely able to control his own laughter.

“You’re built like you do something hardcore; I don’t know why I didn’t expect it to be rugby.” 

“Changbin’s one hell of a rugby player,” Chan claims. “You should see him in a game. He barrels through the opposing team like they’re made of paper.” 

“I’d love to see you in a rugby game. I’m not one for sports, but I’d watch to support,” Jisung says right as he takes a drag and leans back. 

“Oh—oh, the sun’s rising,” Raisha points out while smacking Chan’s arm frantically. 

“Hey, I see it, you don’t have to hit me,” he chuckles right before he unlocks the car doors and steps out, moving to the side to help Raisha out as Changbin and Jisung help themselves out. The sudden ventilation makes the smoke poof out of Chan’s truck and fills the surrounding area, hazing over almost the next few feet. 

They stare as the Sun creeps over the horizon, pink, golden, and blue hues blending together throughout the sky and creating an even more ethereal experience from just how much weed they’ve been smoking in the past hour. 

“Wow,” Changbin breathes out in awe, leaning against Jisung as he keeps his eyes on the sky. 

“This is so fucking cool,” Jisung laughs breathily.

The four of them stare at the sky without saying anything and simply admire the way the Sun slowly gets higher and higher into the sky until it’s completely peaked over the horizon and the sky has turned pink and orange. 

“Hey, Ji,” Changbin nudges him slightly. Jisung hums in response without paying much attention to him. “How do you feel about joining Raisha, Chan and I? Officially?” 

“Shit, I’d fucking love to, dude,” he smiles and turns to look at him.  

“Great,” Chan grins as well. “Camp in the studio after this and shred on your guitar like you did just now. Maybe we can add it into the track we’ve been working on.” 

“God knows we need help with their most recent track,” Raisha teases while nudging his ribs with her elbow, making him yelp and swat at her arm. 

“I’d love to—I’m sobering up right now, man,” Jisung jokes. 

“The weed somehow feels like it’s wearing off while getting stronger. I don’t know what the fuck is happening anymore,” Changbin chuckles as he turns around and starts heading to Chan’s truck. “I want to pass out. Chan, can we just sleep in your car until the weed wears off?” 

“I doubt I can even drive us back. If I ever drive high, kick me,” Chan nods as he slings his arm over Raisha’s shoulders and starts guiding her back to the truck as well.

“You wouldn’t even need to ask.”

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iii. 

Having Jisung around has definitely changed the vibe in the music room drastically. The three of them find themselves feeling a little lighter whenever he’s around—which is all the time since he’s decided that he never leaves the room either. The four of them have spent an ungodly amount of time together in the past week only because of how they’re always in the music room at night. 

Unsurprisingly, Jisung has more of a filter when he’s sober, but he still has an extremely bright and sprightly personality that has his older friends giggling with glee whenever he makes a joke because he’s also a pretty funny guy. 

“Holy shit, I’m done with the track,” Chan lets out a loud sigh and throws his arms into the air. “Fuck, how did we finish that so fast?” 

“Fucking finally!” Changbin cheers from his spot on the floor. He’s sitting cross-legged on the floor with his laptop opened right in front of him and with his lyric notebook in his lap. 

“You guys want to get started on another one?” Jisung suggests, lollipop stuck in between his lips as he sits on the swivel chair sideways, legs dangling off of the armrest of one of them and his head hanging off of the other. His nonchalance seems to rub off on his friends from how calm and chill Jisung can get; the first example being how he’s currently sitting on the chair while he chews on a lollipop. 

Yes. 

Chews.

“Eh, what’s the harm in that?” Raisha shrugs from the couch with her bass in her lap. She’s been playing it to herself the past few hours while the guys busy themselves with lyrics and the actual mastering of the music. Well, it’s actually just Chan that’s mastering the track while Changbin writes lyrics. Jisung is lazing away in his chair and throwing suggestions left and right or picking up his guitar to play anything that he thinks fits the vibe of the track. 

“Let’s actually get the lyrics done on this one before we move on to another song,” Chan chuckles. 

“Changbin, how far into the lyrics are you?” Jisung asks as he allows his chair to turn to face him. 

“Not that far,” he sighs. “I don’t know what else to write. Nothing’s coming to mind when I listen to this track.” 

“Then write about that,” he shrugs. 

A moment passes before the both of them suddenly shoot upright and stare at each other with bright eyes. 

“An idea!” they yell at the same time.

“You’re a genius!” Changbin laughs excitedly as he starts scribbling down lyrics onto the page. Jisung grabs his own notebook as well, finally sitting in his chair properly, and writes down his own lyrics. Chan seems to have his own spark of inspiration from seeing the two of them while Raisha watches in amusement. 

“You guys really just bounce off of each other huh?” she chuckles. She only laughs more when they seem so immersed in writing lyrics that they don’t seem to have heard her and she returns her attention back to their bass to allow them the space to spew their creativity onto their notebooks. 

Another half an hour passes and Jisung’s the first to shoot from his chair with his notebook, “I’m done!” 

“You are actually sent by God,” Chan chuckles in disbelief as Jisung places the notebook on the table in front of him and he lets his eyes skim over it. “Run into the recording booth and let’s get it onto the track.” 

“Yes sir!” 

Changbin watches with a fake grimace on his face at how quickly Jisung has finished writing the lyrics, but it slowly fades into an, almost, proud smile. He isn’t entirely surprised since Jisung’s proven to be extremely fast when it comes to writing lyrics and he proved it the first time when Raisha dared him to fit a whole chocolate muffin the size of his fist into his mouth. Right after Jisung swallowed it, he wrote two verses and a new guitar riff in the span of half an hour. 

He glances at Raisha who watches Jisung with a small smile on her face as Chan starts the recording and he starts rapping. 

“He’s actually pretty damn good,” Raisha chuckles. 

“He’s fucking amazing,” Changbin corrects her with a laugh. He leans back on his arms and watches the way the lyrics flow out of JIsung’s mouth so effortlessly, the sound flooding through the studio monitors on Chan’s desk. 

“That’s perfect, Sung, thank you,” Chan praises when he pauses the track. “Get out here and give it a listen.” Jisung bounces in his spot for a moment before rushing out of the room. 

But right before Chan starts the track, there’s a knock on the door that has all of them turning their heads. 

“I’ll get it. You guys just keep working,” Changbin says and stands up off of the floor. 

After Jisung’s sudden appearance, the idea of someone knocking on the door of the music room in the middle of the night stopped being so surprising. 

Changbin opens the door and his eyes almost pop out of his skull when he’s faced with a woman who can’t be any older than Jisung. Her hair’s dyed dark blue and cut right above her shoulders as she looks at him with her hands stuffed into the pockets of her black bomber jacket. 

Holy shit, she’s gorgeous. 

“Is Raisha Lo here? One of my friends said that she’s usually in the music room at this hour.”

“It’s three a.m., but yeah,” he nods. “She’s in the recording room—c-come on in.”  Changbin closes the door when she walks past him and he feels like he’s going to pass out when she smiles at him. Music floods through the corridor of the room as he brings her down and into the recording room. “Raisha,” he calls once Chan pauses the track and Jisung lets out a bashful giggle at another praise from him.  

Raisha turns at the call of her name and she makes eye contact with the woman, eyes widening as she puts her bass down. 

“Oh god, I completely forgot you were coming,” she blurts out. “Sorry, Ryujin.” 

“It’s fine. I was actually considering cancelling because I was just at a party with one of my friends,” she claims politely, standing straight with her hands clasped in front of herself. 

Chan and Jisung turn around to see who’s entered the room and they wave back at Ryujin when she waves smally at them. 

“These are my friends; Chan, Changbin, and Jisung. We basically camp here every night, so you might just start camping here, too,” Raisha explains, laughing slightly when Ryujin smiles. 

Changbin feels his heart starting to flutter in his chest when she sees the way her eyes crinkle at the corner and her cheeks lift in a way where it looks like she has whiskers.

Oh my god, she’s so cute. 

He thinks his chest is going to fucking explode the longer he watches her. The back of her black bomber jacket has a red dragon printed along the width of it; starting at the sleeve of her left shoulder all the way to the right. 

“Who’s this?” Jisung asks, his hand raising to point directly at her. 

Which only earns a smack from Chan and a grumble about him being rude. 

“This:” Raisha starts as she stands beside Ryujin, “is Shin Ryujin. She’s a first year and she’s taking one of the courses from the media school. I’m her music mentor.” 

“Where’d you two meet? I didn’t realise we were doing mentors,” Chan claims as he looks between the two.

“Raisha’s friends with one of my seniors. He said that if I wanted a music mentor then to come to one of you guys and I figured she was the least intimidating out of all of you,” Ryujin shyly explains, voice soft in comparison to how loud her outfit is. 

“Well, you came to the right place,” he smiles. “We’re actually in the middle of recording something for a song of ours. So, you can take over the jamming room if you want some privacy or you can choose a spot here and just hang out with us.” 

She turns to Raisha with a questioning look but the bassist smiles and pats her back gently. 

“What if we just spend tonight watching these guys work?”

“I’m alright with anything,” Ryujin claims

“You wanna hear what we’re working on?” Jisung asks as he moves away from Chan for a moment. When she nods, he smacks Chan’s shoulder with the back of his hand. 

“You ask me nicely or I’m going to throw you through the window, Ji,” he grumbles. 

“Be nice,” Raisha snaps. He looks at her for a moment before pouting and turning back to the computer, grumbling something under his breath while trying to ignore Jisung’s smug smirk as Chan presses play on the track. “Come,” she quietly urges and pulls Ryujin to the couch where they both sit. 

Changbin returns to his spot on the floor where he picks up his lyric book and runs through what he has now, bobbing his head along with the music as he mutters the words to himself as the music plays. 

The music pauses after a moment and Changbin loses himself in his own bubble as he runs through the lyrics in his head, almost forgetting that Ryujin is now there, watching as Chan and Jisung start discussing what else to do with the track. 

Ryujin’s attention shifts to Changbin and she watches the way he mutters the lyrics as though he’s reciting something. Raisha’s arm nudges hers slightly, “talk to him.” She turns to the older woman with wide eyes, but she only nods and smiles. “He looks scary, but he’s really just a softie on the inside.”

“He’s on the rugby team,” Ryujin whispers, intimidated even by the mere idea of approaching him. 

“Yeah, because he likes rugby,” Raisha chuckles softly. “I promise, once you get to know him, he’s not as big and scary as he seems. Just give it a shot.”

Ryujin stares at her for a moment longer and takes a deep breath before nodding. She’s not sure what she’s supposed to be doing here anyway—Ryujin’s just here because she thought Raisha was sweet the first time they met and she wanted to get to know her more. Also, she’s genuinely interested in what she has to offer in terms of music, so she thought she’d give Raisha a chance. 

Changbin doesn’t even notice when Ryujin slides off of the couch to sit beside him, her hand hovering over his shoulder before she pulls it away and leans closer instead. 

“What are you working on?” Her voice practically pops Changbin’s bubble and he almost short-circuits when he realises that Ryujin’s talking to him. 

“O-Oh, just some lyrics,” he says while clearing his throat. “We’re trying something… about having a major creative block… because we all had a creative block. But if you give Jisung any topic, he’ll come up with lyrics or a melody right after he eats something sweet; it’s a thing for him.”

“Ah,” she hums.

“Do you… want to see what I have so far?” Changbin offers as he lifts his notebook slightly. Ryujin’s eyes lighten a bit and it sends his heart through the roof. 

“Sure,” Ryujin nods and leans slightly closer to read his notebook. Raisha purses her lips together when she smiles, standing from the couch to approach Chan and Jisung once she’s certain that Changbin and Ryujin are too preoccupied to notice. 

“Look,” she whispers, leaning down to Chan’s ear so that both of them can hear her. All three of them turn around to see the way Changbin’s bubble seems to have formed once again, only this time, Ryujin is in it as well. 

“Woah,” Chan chuckles, leaning back in slight disbelief. “She’s burst his bubble.”

“No, no,” Jisung shakes his head. “I think she’s in his bubble.”

“They’re kinda cute together, don’t you think?” Raisha points out. 

“Their styles look like they were made for each other.”

“And she reminds me of when Changbin first showed up here.” 

Raisha smiles at the way Ryujin laughs at something that Changbin says softly, his eyes practically turning into hearts when he sees the way she reacts. 

“He is so going to fall in love with her.”

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“No fucking way!” Ryujin laughs as her head falls backwards, her hand raising to cover her mouth. 

“I don’t know what the hell I’m doing and it’s honestly a fucking miracle that I’m graduating next year,” Chan laughs heartily. 

“Dude, I’m in my first year and the concept of graduating feels so far away,” Jisung groans. 

The three men had finished with working on their track and with Ryujin’s newfound company, Jisung had held back on pulling any of his weed on in favour of trying to break her shell naturally. Which leads them to their current situation of sitting in a circle while they play truth or dare. 

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing—shit, I’ve been here for a month and I have no idea what course I’m even taking,” he laughs.  

“How do you know what classes to go into?” Ryujin laughs. 

“I go to whichever one I feel like. Attendance isn’t compulsory, so I’m just going to attend the exams—If I know which ones to go to, that is. I think I’m just going to wait until someone sends a schedule to one of the group chats and I’ll be able to guess which ones I’m supposed to attend.” 

“I really don’t think that’s how university works,” Changbin teases. “But I’m going to trust that your method’s better than the guys who don’t attend the exams at all and end up dropping out because they decide they can pay their way out of it.” 

“Yeah, fuck the rich!” Chan whoops. Changbin lets out another laugh and lays down on the floor. “Okay, Changbin. Your turn.”

“Truth,” he sighs without sitting upright. 

“What are your plans in the future?” 

“Fuck, I feel like I should be high to answer a question like that,” Changbin laughs as he sits up once again. “I… I don’t know,” he confesses while rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. “It’s either I work harder in whatever we have going on now or I get into professional rugby.” 

“No other options?”

“You get one question per round,” he raises his eyebrows at Chan who only laughs. “And no, I don’t have any other options that I’m interested in, so those are the two that I’m trying to work on.” 

“Completely valid,” Ryujin blurts out right after sipping on a box of Milo that Jisung had given to everyone in the room. “I don’t know why the hell I’m in the media school, but here I am anyway. I have no idea what I want to get into, but I might try working for an internship in film production during Summer break.”

“Film production, huh? You could try talking to some of the film kids if you want to try that,” Raisha suggests. 

“I could do that. I just don’t know what else to do and film production was one of the only things that I would think about,” she hums.  

“Maybe you could try film production first and then branch out for other internships to see what sticks,” Chan suggests. 

“That’s one of the best advice you’ve ever given throughout the entire time that I’ve known you,” Jisung snorts. 

“Chan gives really good advice when he’s not basically trying to sweat music out of his body,” Raisha laughs. 

“She’s right. Chan becomes the worst person alive when he’s producing music. Other than that, stand up guy,” Changbin jokes. 

“You’re both assholes,” Chan clicks his tongue in annoyance, looking away from them before smiling. “‘Music producer’ me is too sleep deprived and too filled with Monster energy and Redbull to want to be sweeter.” 

“The only person he’s nice to when he’s sleep deprived is Raisha, and even then, it’s because she’s the one providing the Monster.” 

“I’m nice to you whenever you bring snacks, okay?” He claims while rolling his eyes. 

“I bring snacks every night, Chan. It doesn’t change the fact that you’re still an asshole when we’re in this room.” Changbin grumbles. 

“Bring me Monster and instant ramen and I’ll marry you,” he jokes. 

“You should’ve told me that the first time we met instead of letting me spend an entire year trying to figure out how to woo you.” 

“‘Woo’?” Ryujin laughs loudly. “Who still uses that term?” 

Changbin’s face heats up immensely when he hears her laughing, but he isn’t even embarrassed that she’s teasing him. 

He’s honestly more flustered at the fact that she’s laughing at one of his jokes despite it not being that funny. The past few hours that he’s spent with her, Changbin really finds himself keening at any and everything she’s been saying because he’s so fucking infatuated with her. 

Chan crosses his arms over his chest when he sees the way Changbin’s eyes seem to turn into fucking hearts again. There’s something about Ryujin that just seems to reel him in and it’s so very obvious to his friends because they’ve never seen him this into someone upon meeting them. 

“A friend of mine said that Chan’s considered one of the most wanted men on campus,” Ryujin claims. 

“What the fuck—really?!” Changbin bellows with laughter while Chan’s eyes widen immensely, face turning bright red while Raisha and Jisung stare at him in disbelief with their jaws dropped. 

“There’s something about the mysterious senior who spends all of his time in the music room that just makes the first years fall to their knees for him!” she claims with a gleeful laugh. 

“I-Is that really what they think?” Chan stammers.

“Oh my god,” Raisha gasps, her hand flying to hold onto Chan’s shoulder and making him turn to her. “That’s why that one table of students kept staring at you the other day in the cafeteria.” 

“Holy shit, you’re right!” Jisung gasps as well as he lets his hand slap over his mouth. “What do they say about him?” He turns to Ryujin who only shrugs in response with a cheeky smile on her face.

“Apparently, everyone in my class is head. Over. Heels. For Chan. He’s all they talk about! They call him the ‘buff music club guy’ and every time they talk about him, they’re always so frustrated that he’s only ever in the cafeteria with Raisha and Changbin.” 

“Why don’t they ever approach me then?” he laughs. 

“Because they’re terrified of Changbin and they think you and Raisha are dating.”  

“We’re not dating,” Raisha says before Chan even has the chance to say anything. Changbin laughs at that, but decides not to say anything; not even when he sees the way Chan’s smile falters for a split second only for him to let out another laugh. 

“You guys sure act like you are,” Jisung huffs. “You’re all so lovey dovey with each other that I’m not that surprised everyone who sees you thinks that you’re dating.”

“I think the both of us are just extremely affectionate with each other,” she laughs and dismisses the topic with the wave of his hand. 

Changbin spares a glance at Chan, but he still avoids saying anything when he sees the obvious discomfort on his face at her statement. Ryujin notices the shift in the air and quickly changes the topic upon seeing the way Chan’s smile fades once again and he faces the wall. 

“A friend of mine is on the baseball team and apparently they throw pretty big parties,” Ryujin claims as she re-adjusts her position and pulls her knees to her chest. 

“Oh, yeah,” Changbin nods. “They’re parties are the best because they’re all so nice. Chan’s usually one of the sober ones when he’s there.” 

“I don’t really like drinking as much as some of the other guys do, so I’m usually hanging around and staying sober just in case anyone needs anything.” Chan pulls his phone out of his pocket and opens his gallery to show them a picture of some of him and the final year students at a party; all of them except for Chan looking obviously cronked. “Plus, I get to experience whatever bullshit they decide to go on with.”

“Do you drink, Ryujin?” Raisha asks while leaning towards her slightly, her head tilting curiously as she looks at Ryujin. 

“I do, but I’ve never been to a party with alcohol before,” she confesses softly. “I’m not really a party… kind of person, but I’ll go if my friends invite me.”

“Don’t take her to the baseball team’s parties. They’ll just give her some form of alcohol poisoning,” Chan warns. “Especially with that one new kid. I don’t know what he’s on, but Felix downs alcohol like it’s water.”

“I haven’t gone to any of the parties by tbe baseball team, but I am curious to know about his alcoholic water,” Jisung chuckles. 

“There’s really no harm in checking it out. The baseball team hosts nicer parties than the football team because a good portion of them are actually sober during it all. Example A: Chan,” Raisha jokes as she holds her hand out right underneath Chan’s chin to show his face off. He closes his eyes and smiles with his teeth at the gesture, laughing when he pulls away slightly. “But they’re really sweet about it. You could approach any of the baseball team members and they’ll try to keep you safe if you ask them to.”

“Hell, half of them would walk you back home if you asked them to,” he claims. “Their team members are also known for only taking in people who they trust or think are good. So, if they turn out to be complete assholes or are really creepy, the team members kick them off of the team before their coach can even do anything. They’re really cool guys!” 

“I’ll think about it, but I’m not the kind of person to go into parties on my own.” 

“You can come with us if you’d like,” Changbin offers almost instantly, which earns a few looks from Chan and Raisha specifically. “I’m not one for parties either, but sometimes, it’s nice to just let loose.” 

“He has a point,” Chan nods. “I’m usually there anyway, so you can always drop by and there’ll be someone you know there.” He smiles when Ryujin turns to him and it makes shoulders drop slightly, her body relaxing at the idea of going to a party knowing someone. 

“I’ll be there for the next one, then.” 

She turns to Changbin and smiles when he does. Only his is an awkwardly pursed-lip smile at the realisation that now he has to go to a party. 

Oh well, the things you do for cute women who show up at your recording studio. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

iv.

Changbin finds himself alone in his bedroom for the first time in a few weeks. Chan went home for the weekend, finally, and Jisung’s been M.I.A for the past few hours, so Changbin isn’t exactly hoping to spend the night at the music studio with him. Raisha has her own things to worry about, and this time, Changbin realises that he hasn’t hung out with her without Chan. 

And then he realises that she probably spends so much of her time with Changbin only because Chan’s with him almost always. 

But tonight, Changbin’s actually alone. He isn’t sure whether it’s more of a blessing than it is a curse, because now he’s just plagued by his thoughts. He sits at his desk with his laptop open, the glow of the screen being the only source of light for the entire room as it reflects off of his face. 

There’s something about being alone that Changbin has a love-hate relationship with only because he truly would rather force himself to swallow a sock rather than think about what kind of unresolved emotions brew from within. But whenever he’s alone, Changbin finds himself thinking over his relationships and emotions in a pace that’s easy for him to process; which is the only thing that he likes about being alone. 

Changbin hasn’t thought about his past in a while. It’s something that he’s… not entirely proud of and that he hopes never becomes a topic of interest for anyone. His phone dings beside his laptop and he glances at the lit-up screen.

Ryujin (the pretty one from the music studio): Hey, Changbin! Are you busy rn? 

Changbin (the quiet guy from music club): Not rly  Why?

Ryujin (the pretty one from the music studio): Some friends of mine are going for a joyride  You wanna come along?

Changbin (the quiet guy from music club): Depends on who’s going 

Ryujin (the pretty one from the music studio):  Felix from the baseball team  (Y/n) and Yeji from the cheerleading team  It’ll just be the four of us

Changbin (the quiet guy from music club): Ah sure  I don’t know what else I’d be doing anyway 

Ryujin (the pretty one from the music studio): Great!  We’ll come pick you up from your block then See you in 15

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“Any destinations in mind?” Changbin asks as he squeezes into the backseat, right beside Ryujin. He desperately tries not to think about the fact that his thigh is squished against hers from how little space there is in the car and how Yeji is on the other side of her, but Changbin can feel his heart trying to pop out of his chest. 

“I’m just going to drive down the road until we feel like turning back,” Felix chuckles as he pulls out of the drop-off zone. “This is the only time you’re going to be in my car. I’m not bringing it back here after this because I know you guys are just going to make me drive you around the place.”

“You’re just giving us more reason to convince Chan to take us out,” Yeji chuckles. 

“Yeah, make him take you out, not me,” Felix laughs. “Can any of you guys actually drive?” 

“I know how to drive, but I don’t have my licence,” Changbin nods. 

“Parents taught you when you were young? Mine did that, too,” you hum. 

Changbin blinks a few times before nodding, “uh… yeah. Something like that.” 

“I was supposed to take driving lessons in a few months, but I don’t think I’m going to get the chance until Summer break,” Yeji explains. 

“Great. When you get your licence, you’re driving everyone around,” Felix deadpans. 

“Hey, Bin,” you glance over the back of the seat and Changbin hums in response. “When did you learn how to drive?”

“Fourteen,” he states. While the information isn’t exactly the most harmful thing in his eyes, it’s not entirely something that he wants to dive on because it’s tied to his past. 

“Ever ridden a motorcycle before?”

“I’m pretty damn good at it,” Changbin chuckles. 

“Where’d you learn that?” Felix laughs, glancing at him through the rearview mirror. The question makes Changbin realise that he may have just dug his hole a little deeper than he had intended. 

Ryujin spares a glance his way when she feels the way his body seems to tense and he avoids looking Felix in the eye. 

“H-Have you guys ever seen that video of Felix trying to one-shot a bottle of fireball?” she quickly asks. 

“What?!” Yeji laughs and slaps her hand over her mouth in disbelief. 

Changbin turns to Ryujin hesitantly and he feels himself relax slightly when she scrunches her nose up slightly to give him a reassuring smile.

“Oh shit! I almost forgot about that!” You pull your phone out of your pocket and laugh as you look through your gallery. “Every time Felix and the baseball guys host friend-parties, he ends up throwing himself further down the drain than whenever they open it up to the entire university.”

“You just joined the baseball team. How in the world did you convince them to let you make the drinks?” 

“They asked whether anyone has experience in making cocktails and I told them that I used to bartend. I made them drinks and they said ‘yes’ as long as I don’t kill someone,”  Felix explains with a chuckle. He begins his story on how he had gotten bartending experience, but Changbin starts to tune out. 

He’s starting to realise that becoming friends with new people means having to explain his fear of new people in general. But Ryujin nudges him slightly with her shoulder and it makes Changbin turn to look at her. 

“You okay?” she asks, voice soft enough that even Yeji doesn’t catch it from how loud you and Felix are laughing. 

“Yeah,” he mouths. Changbin notices the way Ryujin seems to double-check with how she nods slightly and raises her eyebrows questioningly. “I promise. Thank you.” She raises her phone right before typing at it, only for Changbin’s phone to vibrate in his pocket. 

Ryujin (the pretty one from the music studio): I’ll change the topic if you get uncomfy  I found out I’m pretty good at it lol

Changbin (the quiet guy from music club): Dw  I won’t bother you with this forever haha  But thank you

Ryujin (the pretty one from the music studio): I’ll do it whenever you need it  :D 

Changbin doesn’t reply to the message. Instead, he turns to her and smiles, mouthing another ‘thank you’. Ryujin nods before turning her attention back to the conversation between the three of you. 

Changbin feels as though a large weight has been lifted from his chest. There’s something about knowing that Ryujin can catch his discomfort that just makes him feel… safe. And for once in his life, Changbin can actually feel the security that she gives him, which honestly makes him also feel like his heart is about to fucking pop straight out of his chest and slam into the windshield—but that’s a feeling that he’ll push to another day. 

His crush on Ryujin isn’t something that he wants to address, at least not right now. 

There’s bigger things on Changbin’s mind that he needs to think about.

“Get out of my car!” Felix announces as he parks the car, tearing Changbin out of his thoughts and making him look outside to see nothing but what looks like an abandoned building. 

“Is this where you murder us for laughing?” Yeji jokes as she climbs out of the car. “Jesus, Felix, where the fuck did you take us?” 

“It’s nice—I promise,” he chuckles and pops the trunk of his car open to pull out a few bags that clink around, earning a few suspicious looks from the rest . You walk ahead of the group and enter the building without much hesitation while Ryujin, Yeji, and Changbin watch; extremely unsure of what is happening or where they are. “You guys are going to love it, honestly. It’s a nice place to just hang out.” 

“Felix, when I made that joke yesterday about wanting someone to ‘take me out’,” Yeji starts, “I meant on a date.”

“This can be your date!” Felix laughs as he slings his arm over her shoulders. “Just… you know… be nice about it when you tell Hyunjin.” 

“Oh, Hyunjin doesn’t care—we’re not like that,” she reassures him, allowing him to pull her into his side. 

Changbin lags behind as Felix and Yeji walk ahead, Ryujin slowing her footsteps as well in order to walk beside him. 

“Have you known Felix long?” she asks. 

“We’re… somewhat friends,” Changbin shrugs. “I was at a party with him once. I’m not exactly that close to him, but I trust him.”  

“He’s easy to talk to,” Ryujin claims while nodding her head slightly. Even in the dark, Changbin’s still able to note that she’s wearing the same bomber jacket she wore the first time that they had met. He wonders where it came from; it could easily be her favourite since he actually sees her wearing it constantly whenever he is wandering campus. 

“How do you know him?” He glances at Ryujin. 

“Yeji and I share a few classes. Becoming friends with her was like joining a network, almost—she’s more than a social butterfly… almost like a social… spider… or something. She’s practically sewn together with Hyunjin, she hangs out regularly with Felix and (Y/n)—who, by the way, are also almost a part of each other—and she makes good connections. She has multiple circles and she just jumps in and out of all of them.”

Ryujin lets out a small sigh as she watches the way Yeji laughs when she pulls away from Felix to smack his arm. 

“I’ve always wondered what it’s like to be that extroverted, but that’s just something that I’m not able to do,” she chuckles. 

“Introvert?” 

“Very much so,” Ryujin groans slightly. 

“You didn’t seem like one that night in the studio,” Changbin teases, chuckling when he turns to look at her. 

“If I have at least one person that I know, it’s a bit more bearable,” she claims with a laugh, “god, the first day of orientation? I felt like I was actually going to go into cardiac arrest; my heart was beating so hard and I felt like I was actually going to have a panic attack.” 

“Panic… do you get those often?” 

“Not as often as you’re thinking,” Ryujin reassures him. Her lips curl up slightly upon seeing the concern on his face, “it’s not something that happens a lot, but you know how it is.” 

Changbin purses his lips together and nods, albeit hesitantly, just as he hears Felix laughing loudly from ahead of them. He looks up for a moment to look at him and Yeji, but she’s only looking at him in slight shock at the volume of his laughter. 

“If you’re going to be looking out for me, then I’m gonna have to start looking out for you, too,” Changbin claims. 

“You don’t have to. I just do it because I’ve been there,” she glances at him, but all he does is shrug in response. Ryujin sighs softly and smiles, “fine, but I don’t know what triggers these panic attacks, so you might just have to pay really close attention to me from now on.”

“Now, that, I would’ve gladly done in the first place,” he chuckles. Ryujin’s eyes widen and her cheeks flush red at the comment. 

Her brain almost goes into overdrive at him and she turns her head to look ahead just as they enter the building. Changbin lets out a laugh, soft enough that Ryujin wouldn’t hear, as they continue to follow Felix as he blindly leads his friends into the dilapidated building. There’s gaps in the walls and the ceiling looks as unsafe as everything else in the abandoned building with the amount of broken concrete and shit that piles along the walls. 

Weirdly enough, everything’s been pushed to the side to allow some form of a pathway that leads them further and further into the building until they stop at one of the rooms. 

Felix pushes the door open to see you proudly standing there with your arms open, fairy lights strung along the ceiling and the room looking surprisingly clean and dirt-free. There’s a pile of sleeping bags neatly laid out along the floor and a projector in the middle of the room that casts what looks like Youtube on the left wall of the room. 

Changbin’s jaw drops. 

What the fuck?!

“Welcome to (Y/n) and I’s cave!” Felix announces as he places the plastic bag on the floor gently, glass clinking together on the inside. “We found this building a few weeks ago and we turned this room into our own little cave of wonders!”

“Couldn’t it have been anywhere else that didn’t look like a serial killer’s lair,” Yeji chuckles softly, but she looks around the room in awe. 

“We usually come here to get away from the university and to have time alone where no one would actually bother us. So, turn your phones off, choose a sleeping bag, and let us have a drunk slumber party!” 

“Felix thought it would be nice to bring you guys here since you wanted to go on a joyride,” you chuckle. 

Felix nods ecstatically and starts pulling various bottles of alcohol out of the bag, handing one out to everyone in the room. 

“Won’t it get hot in the Summer? I doubt the electricity’s working,” Ryujin comments. 

“That’s a story for when Summer happens. Now, it’s Autumn and it’s really not that warm,” he smiles gleefully right before he turns around and slides himself into one of the sleeping bags. 

Ryujin and Changbin exchange a look, but he gives her a reassuring smile and chooses the sleeping bag right at the end, so she chooses the one right beside him. 

“This is the beginning of one of the weirdest slumber parties I’ve ever been to,” Changbin laughs as he gets comfortable. Well, as he tries to get comfortable. 

The sleeping bag can only do so much to cushion his body against the hard and cold concrete floor of the room, but Changbin will take what he can get. 

“This is the beginning? Felix parking in the lot was already the beginning for me,” Ryujin snorts. 

“Let’s just agree to not talk about what happens tonight ever,” Yeji hums, sliding into the sleeping bag on the other side of Ryujin. You’ve gotten comfortable in the one right beside Yeji while Felix isn’t even inside of the bag—he’s just sprawled out on top of his on the far end. 

“We’ll be fine,” Felix reassures everyone with a laugh. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“I told you,” Changbin chuckles.  

He has his head stuck out of one of the windows with a cigarette stuck in between his fingers while Ryujin rests her arms on the windowsill right beside him, her own head sticking out slightly as she looks out at what seems to be a vast, open field that hasn’t been touched by a single soul. 

He pulls the pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and holds it in her direction, but Ryujin quickly shakes her head. 

“I don’t smoke, but thank you.” Ryujin turns away for a moment and looks out at the view once again.

There’s a cold breeze that gently blows into the room, but no one else is awake to actually appreciate the weather or the—actually really shitty—view. But the weather alone is enough to send the both of them back into a bubble that only seems to contain them. 

“Can I ask you something?” 

“Shoot,” Changbin nods. 

“It’s about the motorcycle.”

Changbin’s body seized for a moment. There’s a part of him that tells him not to, but another part of him says that she’ll find out eventually. If it isn’t the scars that litter his face and arms, then it’ll be something else where he’ll most likely end up telling her anyway. 

“I used to be in a gang when I was in school. Wasn’t my proudest moment, but it kept me safe.” 

“And that explains the…” 

“The scars—yeah,” he nods. “There’s more than just the ones on my face, but they’re also worse. If you’re wondering; I wasn’t coerced into it. I joined because I wanted to. I left when I turned seventeen because it was getting sketchier than it already was. Too many things from it were starting to stick with me and I thought I’d be better off not trying to indulge.”

“How bad was it getting?” Ryujin asks further, her eyes practically glued to Changbin’s face to gauge his reaction, and she’s about to stop asking when she sees the way he pauses and his jaw seems to harden. 

“I’ll never forget half of the shit I saw.  It was getting… horrible. And that’s my sense of horribleness in comparison to what they were doing before that, but I knew that I wouldn’t actually be able to turn my life around if I stayed.” 

Ryujin nods without saying anything else as she finally turns away from him. 

“I try to avoid telling anyone about this, but sometimes, there are exceptions,” he claims lightly. “Even if I do, I try to keep away from the actual details of it. People usually end up running away from me when I do.” 

“Tell me.” 

Changbin’s head whips to look at her, but Ryujin only turns and meets his eyes with no form of judgement or fear in her own. His mouth opens and closes repeatedly when he realises that there doesn’t seem to be any form of negativity behind her eyes, and it makes Changbin sigh while nodding. 

“Corpses don’t look like what you think they do in the movies,” he states as he turns away. “None of them were by my accord, but there’s a different kind of feeling that runs through you when you see one knowing that it wasn’t ‘natural causes’,” Changbin says while quoting with his left hand. “The first time I saw one was when I realised that I needed to get out.” 

“What led you to it? You don’t seem like the type of person who would just happen to join a gang,” Ryujin chuckles lightly. 

“I was bullied in school because my mother’s in prison. I don’t know why people decided that her crimes were mine and they would beat me up over it. A few of my seniors offered to protect me in exchange to join and I agreed to it. I didn’t even hesitate—I just didn’t really care anymore. But when I reached my final year in high school, my father offered to send me to university if I wanted to and I took that as a ticket to leave.”

“And they just let you go?” 

“They didn’t have a choice. I told them I wouldn’t report them and I said I just wanted to get a degree and get away from it all. I don’t think they saw me as a threat, so they didn’t really seem to care at the time,” Changbin explains, taking a drag from his cigarette right after. “I think that if I told you about what my mother did, I’d take it that you’d be a bit wary of me, too. I wouldn’t blame you,” his laugh comes out bitter, a sigh leaving right after. 

“Your mother’s crimes don’t define you, Changbin,” Ryujin sighs. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I was just curious about you.”

“Isn’t there a saying against curiosity? ‘Curiosity killed the cat’—or whatever.”   

“Yeah, but satisfaction brought it back,” she hums. 

Silence settles between the two as Changbin allows Ryujin’s words to process in his mind. He feels realisation sparking within him and what she was implying and he turns to look at her with the side of his mouth lifted. 

“So, what does the cat say to what I just told you?” He angles his body to face her completely while she smiles and does the same. 

“I think you’ve brought it back.”  

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v.

There’s something about becoming friends with Ryujin and her friends that seems to have opened up doors for Changbin. He’s already in the at the end of his first semester and he feels like he’s seen way more than what Chan and Raisha had taken him on the past year. Ryujin’s friends are… eccentric… to say the least. 

They’re more adventurous than Chan and Raisha are, but their influence seems to rub off on the entire group, which is something that Jisung also seems to do; his influence, however, only ever leads to getting high at 5 a.m. and staring at birds while they think of new songs to write. 

“Wow,” Changbin breathes out in awe upon entering the dimly lit bar. 

There’s a bright neon orange sign hanging off of the brick wall with some cheesy quote that he’s pretty sure they got either off of Pinterest or Tumblr, but it looks nice in the current ambience. A wooden bar covers the left side of the long room and a stage right at the end that has bearably bright stage lights directed towards it. 

“A few of my friends come here often just to hang out, so I know the owner,” Jeongin claims as he leads them towards one of the booths opposite the bar. 

Chan and Raisha had decided to tag along as well since they were stuck around, but Jisung had decided to stay in his room since his social battery was melting faster than he could charge it and the idea of going to a live show made him feel like he was going to die. 

“What do you guys want? Lix and I will bring them from the bar,” he offers once everyone’s piled into the booth.

“I actually want something nice that won’t put me into a coma; so the blueberry fizz looks nice,” Changbin chuckles. 

“I pegged you as someone who only drinks rum and coke,” Ryujin teases while nudging him with her elbow, to which he responds by swatting her arm away with a groan. “Get me the strawberry fizz.” 

Felix and Jeongin nod and turn their attention to Raisha and Chan… who are too preoccupied with Raisha’s polaroid camera to realise what the two are asking.

“Alright, you two get your drinks yourselves—I’m not waiting for this,” he sighs and turns around to leave with Felix. 

“Let’s go take pictures at the stage!” Raisha excitedly says as she holds onto Chan’s wrist and practically drags him away, leaving Ryujin and Changbin together. 

“What happened to your jacket? The one with the dragon. I thought you always wear it,” Changbin points out, gesturing to the plain black bomber jacket that he’s been seeing her wear quite often recently. 

“The sleeves are tearing,” she sighs, “it’s such a shame. That jacket���s lasted me so long and it’s only now tearing apart.”

“Ever thought about getting a new one?” 

“None of them really catch my eye, you know? The ones that I really want are almost impossible to get.” 

Ryujin turns away for a moment to watch Raisha and Chan while Changbin all but nods as he turns away. 

“Do they bring you out on these often?” he asks.

“They’ve invited me a few times, but these events seem really daunting,” Ryujin confesses softly. She looks around the venue nervously, hands rubbing together as her elbows rest on the table. 

Changbin reaches over and places his hand over hers, making her whip her head towards him.

“If you need to leave, I’ll walk you back to campus,” he reassures her. 

“I’ll be fine. Thank you,” Ryujin nods. Changbin smiles and pulls his hand away, but leaves it resting on the table as they wait for Felix and Jeongin to return. “Do you come to live gigs?”

“I used to go to these quite a bit,” Changbin nods. “But that was last year and Chan drove us. It wasn’t this bar, though. He had another place that he’s more into, but they closed a few months ago, so there hasn’t been that much live music for us.”

“Jeongin seems to be really into these things,” she claims with a hum. They both turn to see the way Jeongin and Felix talk to the bartender, seemingly getting along well as the woman makes the drinks. “He’s always trying to get me more out and into these sorts of scenes, but I’m not entirely comfortable with the idea of hanging out in these spaces.”

“What made it different this time?” 

Ryujin turns back to Changbin and she shrugs. 

“You said you were coming.”  

Changbin’s entire body stops moving. Completely. He doesn’t even blink as he stares at Ryujin, eyes almost completely blank and face void of any expression that she can read. Until she waves her hand in front of his face and he blinks a few times, the colour flushing to his cheeks and burning his face. 

“Y-You—uhm—wow, I don’t—I don’t know what to say to—uhm—that,” he nervously babbles while Ryujin watches in pure amusement. She rests her chin on the palm of her hand with a coy smile on her face before letting out another laugh when Changbin fails to actually make out any other coherent sentences before he stands up abruptly. “I need to go to the bathroom,” he squeaks, scrambling away and tripping on his own feet as he rushes to the bathroom. 

“What’s up with him?” Jeongin laughs when he and Felix return with the drinks. 

“Was I right?” Felix asks coyly. 

“I think you might be,” she sighs, staring at the spot Changbin was last visible to her. Ryujin turns around and her smile fades almost instantly. “Which isn’t good for me.” 

“You know, if you just explain the whole asexuality thing to him, he’ll definitely understand,” he reassures her. 

“What’s the deal here?” Jeongin looks between the both of them, his lips already snug around the straw of his cocktail. 

“Ryujin has a thing for Changbin, but she thinks that her sexuality’s gonna get in the way,” Felix says, almost too nonchalantly and a bit too loud for Ryujin’s liking. 

“Dude?!” she gasps and reaches over the round table to smack his arm, “could you say that any louder? I’m pretty sure Changbin couldn’t hear you from the bathroom.” 

“Bin’s a pretty neat guy, I’m sure he’ll understand if you talk about it to him,” Jeongin ignores her comment towards Felix and shrugs his shoulders. “If he really likes you, you might just end up being one of those couples who just don’t have sex.”

“Yeah, but some people need that sort of intimacy, Yeni,” Ryujin rolls her eyes.

“You never know. Maybe Changbin’s one of those guys that doesn’t need the intimacy,” Felix insists. “Talk to him. Maybe he’ll be okay with it.”

“I don’t even know how much I like him yet. What if I just dive head first and find out that I’m not even that into him?” 

“Follow your gut, Ryujin,” he quickly says when he notices Changbin returning to the booth. “And don’t pressure yourself into things you don’t want to do. You’re asexual. Don’t have sex with anyone if you don’t want to.”

“That was a quick one,” Jeongin teases Changbin when he sits right beside Ryujin. His face has returned to its natural colour, but his ears are still slightly pinker than usual.

“Just wanted to clear myself before we start drinking because God knows I piss a lot when I’m drunk,” he chuckles, voice wavering slightly when he makes eye contact with Ryujin. 

“Hey,” Chan returns to the table quickly. “Could someone help take some pictures of Raisha and I?” 

“God, rub your relationship in our faces—we get it, you’re dating,” Jeongin groans but stands up nonetheless and follows him. 

“How are they not dating?” Ryujin chuckles, her voice coming soft as if it was supposed to be directed to herself. 

“Chan doesn’t think Raisha likes him back. Raisha doesn’t think Chan likes her back,” Changbin sighs as he watches the way Jeongin takes pictures of the pair with Raisha’s camera as they pose in front of the stage. 

“It’s so fucking obvious, though,” Felix scoffs, taking a sip from his drink. “There’s no way they don’t feel it at least.”

“They function a bit differently,” Changbin shrugs.  

Chan and Raisha return not long after, only, instead of Chan’s arm usually wrapped around her shoulders, his arm is now snugly wrapped around her waist as they smile widely. Jeongin quickly slides himself into the spot right beside Felix and clasps his hands together onto the table.

“What’s up with these guys? Why do they look so happy?” Changbin chuckles. His question makes everyone’s attention move to the couple who purse their lips together to try and hide their smiles, but the flush on their cheeks is enough to give away something.

“Oh my god, you guys just got together,” Ryujin gasps with her hands flying to cover her mouth. 

“What the fuck?” Felix leans back with his jaw dropped.

Raisha shyly places a polaroid picture at the edge of the table and slides it to the middle, “we both realised that there was no way we didn’t like each other back if we were looking at each other like this.” 

Ryujin is the first to pick up the picture while Changbin looks at it from over her shoulder. It’s a simple candid photo that Jeongin must’ve taken when they weren’t paying attention because there’s no way that they would’ve looked at each other this way if they knew what he was doing. 

“Finally gathered the fucking courage, huh?” Changbin chuckles softly as he turns to the pair. “You guys took almost a year and a half before realising that maybe you were into each other.”

“I still don’t understand how it took you guys this long. You both look at each other like you’re completely in love with each other,” Jeongin teases. 

“Shut up,” Chan grumbles and shoves his shoulder lightly. 

“Let’s take tonight to celebrate then,” Felix suggests as he raises his glass. “Come on, guys! Raisha and Chan have finally gotten together!”

“I’m down for that,” Jeongin agrees and raises his glass.

“No, no, guys!” Raisha starts shaking her head. “No! You guys really don’t have to!”

“I’m perfectly fine with celebrating this,” Ryujin laughs and raises her own. Changbin joins in quickly while Raisha and Chan continue to decline profusely, but their friends are insistent and they’re already drinking before they can do anything to stop them. 

While Ryujin and Changbin only take sips out of their glasses, Jeongin and Felix simply one-shot the entirety of their drinks and slam them onto the table. 

“Fuck yeah!” Felix cheers, energy suddenly pumping through his veins, “let’s fucking celebrate!” 

“How much do you wanna bet he’ll be blacked out before the band even comes on stage?” Changbin whispers towards Ryujin. 

“All of my money,” she chuckles. They watch the way Felix gives Chan a bone crushing hug while Raisha stands at the side with a wide smile on her face. 

Until Felix pulls her into the hug and her face contorts in surprise at how sudden the action is… and now Felix has her face squished against Chan’s arm as he jumps excitedly, which practically crushes the couple together. 

“Felix… Felix,” Jeongin laughs as he starts to pull the business student away, “ you’re going to suffocate them before they’re able to actually kiss each other for the first time.” Felix stays giddy as Jeongin manages to pull him away, his bottom lip caught in his teeth to stop himself from showing how extremely happy he is. 

“Why don’t you guys order some drinks for yourselves,” Ryujin suggests, glancing at Jeongin as he nods and keeps Felix from shooting from his seat to hug them or get more drinks. 

“Yeah, we’ll go do that,” Chan nods. He glances at Raisha who nods and wraps her arm around his waist as they start walking towards the bar.

“And spend some time alone together at the bar before Felix gets drunk!” Changbin jokes, laughing loudly when Raisha laughs and nods.

“Can I please at least get another mojito?” Felix asks with his lips jutting out into a pout as he looks between the three of them. 

Jeongin looks at him before sighing, “okay, but you come back straight after and you leave Chan and Raisha alone.” 

“I promise! I just… the bar is right there…” 

“Go,” he nods and lets Felix go, the man excitedly rushing towards the bar upon being unrestrained. “Are you two getting more?” 

“Still working through ours,” Changbin chuckles and gestures to his still mostly full glass. “I’m not really into the idea of getting too drunk tonight.” 

“Neither am I,” Ryujin claims while shaking her head. Her fingers trace the rim of her glass as she speaks, “are you getting anything else?”

“I’ll probably just get something else, but that would be the last one. I have an early class tomorrow, so I’m not going to risk the hangover.”  

“Smart choice,” he chuckles. 

“Yeah, so I’m going to the bar because Felix is being weird with them and I’m also going to get myself another drink.” Jeongin stands up with a sigh while Ryujin and Changbin’s eyes follow him. 

Only to see the way Felix has both of his arms slung over Raisha and Chan while he’s in between the both of them. 

“Oh my god,” Ryujin scoffs, laughing slightly when she sees the way Jeongin grabs the back of Felix’s shirt and drags him away without saying anything. “He’s unbelievable.” 

“He has his quirks,” Changbin laughs and brings the metal straw to his lips, “some, a little bit stranger than others, but the others are pretty nice.” 

“I like his quirks more when he’s less drunk,” she jokes as she watches him down two shots from the bartender, “how the hell does he do that?”

“Felix, for some reason, has a lot of experience. Sometimes, whenever he talks, it sounds like he’s lived multiple lives in the past four or five years and it’s insane.” 

“I should talk to him sometime. Actually get to know him better,” Ryujin simpers as she turns to look at Changbin with a smile that makes him want to hold her hand forever. 

But Changbin will wait until he’s certain. He doesn’t want to go head-first into it when he’s only thinking that he only has a little crush on her. 

So, he’ll wait. Changbin smiles back and he nods, teeth showing from his smile as he turns away from a moment in an attempt to hide his blush; which is a horrible attempt because Ryujin catches it. 

She smiles as well, but dread fills her heart at the realisation that Felix is, unfortunately, so fucking right. Which only makes it harder for her as well. 

Because she likes Changbin so fucking much. And Ryujin can’t bear the idea of being the one who would break his heart. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“Thank you for walking me back,” Ryujin thanks nervously. Her hands are dug into the pockets of her jacket as she tries to find more warmth from the hot packs that are currently gripped as though her life depends on it. 

Changbin’s breath comes out as fogs as he smiles, standing outside the building of her apartment just across from campus. 

“It’s no problem,” he reassures her with a smile. “I don’t think it’s safe for you to be walking around alone this late at night after a few drinks, so just think of it as me looking out for you.”  

“Thank you, for looking out for me then,” Ryujin grins. “I appreciate it, Bin. I really do.” 

“Hey, if you ever need anything, just text me, okay? I don’t live that far. Even if it’s a bug in your bathroom; I’ll come help out if you need me to.”

“That feels a little overkill, but thank you,” she laughs.

“Just let me know if anything comes up,” Changbin smiles. Ryujin nods once again and starts towards the entrance, where she turns around to wave at him once again, before disappearing behind the door. 

Changbin stands outside for a moment longer and lets out a small sigh once Ryujin’s gone. He looks up at the sky only to see the snow starting to fall from the sky and gently flutters to the ground, melting as it hits his face and head. 

He smiles for a moment, bliss running throughout his veins as he thinks about what he could possibly get Ryujin for Christmas. Or would that make him seem too eager? Either way, Changbin’s getting her a gift and he doesn’t care how it might appear to everyone else. 

But Changbin hopes that Ryujin won’t be too off-put about it. The last thing he would want is to make her uncomfortable. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

vi.

Felix had dragged everyone to his house for secret santa. No one was exactly complaining since his house has an actual living room and most of his housemates were out for the holidays, so everyone was a little more accepting of the idea. 

Changbin leans back against his arms and laughs when he sees the look on Chan’s face when he opens the bag to find a car air freshener. 

“Okay, are you serious? My car doesn’t smell,” he scoffs and looks around the room with a tired look on his face. “It only smells because Jisung keeps getting high in it.” 

“Hey, I just like smoking,” Jisung chuckles, obviously slightly faded from the way his head lolls backwards a little too fast and too much for his liking. 

“You smell like burning rags when you smoke, Sung,” Raisha rolls her eyes and leans into Chan’s side, earning a collective gag from you and Felix. 

“I hate that they’re so lovey and cutesy now,” you grumble.

“Better than hearing Chan cry about it every time,” Changbin snorts. 

“Who is it from anyway?” Chan asks, ignoring Changbin’s comment. 

“Are we telling? I thought the whole point of secret santa was the ‘secret’ part of it,” you chuckle. 

“Not in my house,” Felix grins. “And you’re welcome, by the way.” 

“Fuck you,” he laughs as he tosses the crumpled up ribbon at him. 

“Ryujin, you’re up next,” Hyunjin says as he pushes the box with her name on it in her direction. Changbin feels his heart drop to his fucking ass. 

He had practically begged Jeongin for Ryujin’s name and he was really fucking hoping that he would stay anonymous to her because he has a feeling he’s going to explode the moment he sees her reaction. The entire time Changbin had been shopping for his gift, he kept wondering whether she would like it. What if she doesn’t? What if Ryujin fucking hates it and now she’s never going to end up using it?

Changbin’s starting to majorly regret his decision on getting something so much louder than what Ryujin had originally been using. What if she thinks it’s too much? Or worse—what if it’s not loud enough. He nervously watches as she gingerly peels the wrapping paper off of the box and pulls the top of it off, her face falling slightly when she sees it staring back at her. 

“What is it?” you ask and lean over her shoulder to look at the jacket neatly folded inside of the box, the white dragon print spread across the back of the leather. “Holy shit,” your eyes widen. 

Ryujin runs her hand over the leather of it before her head looks up and her eyes immediately find Changbin’s nervous ones that watch her from the other side of the circle. 

“It’s… a leather jacket,” Ryujin says as she picks up the jacket and unfolds the golden sleeves for everyone to see. “A leather jacket that I’ve been wanting for months.”  She turns it around to see the symmetrical dragon prints on both sides of the jacket and lets her eyes trail down the golden stripes on both shoulders. 

Changbin feels so much relief flooding through his veins. He doesn’t know why he would doubt his decision for a second knowing that the jacket is perfect for Ryujin. 

Ryujin pulls off the jacket she’s wearing and slips her arms into the sleeves of the dragon one, standing up to show the back to the group. 

“Wow, that is gorgeous,” Raisha breathes out in awe. She sits upright slightly to look at the print closer, her jaw dropped as she lets her eyes scan over the dragon. 

“It can replace your old one,” Hyunjin claims as he leans against Yeji’s shoulder. 

“Yeah,” Ryujin chuckles breathily and turns back around to sit cross-legged on the floor. 

“Who is it from?” you ask and look around the circle, trying to figure out who could’ve given Ryujin the very jacket she’s been wanting, but no one seems to say anything. 

Until Ryujin looks up and makes direct eye contact with Changbin. He feels his face heating up from the eye contact before he nods and clears his throat. 

“It’s from me.”   

All eyes fall on Changbin and he swears that he’s never wanted the Earth to just swallow him up more than now. 

“Holy shit, Bin,” Jisung breathes out a laugh. 

“Didn’t you say this jacket was limited edition,” Yeji asks Ryujin. 

“I—yeah, it is,” she nods. Her eye contact doesn’t waver for even a second as she looks at Changbin with so much adoration in her eyes. 

“Who’s next?”  Yeji asks as she leans forward to look at all of the boxes.

Ryujin comfortably pulls the jacket around herself as everyone continues picking out their gifts, her eyes practically glued to the Christmas tree in the corner of the room in an attempt to avoid any eye contact with Changbin. Her hand absentmindedly runs over the leather sleeves of the jacket and she smiles slightly to herself when she realises that Changbin wouldn’t have gotten her the jacket if he didn’t like her at least a bit. 

Changbin, however, can’t seem to keep his eyes off of her. He thinks the jacket suits her way more than he had originally thought it would and he doesn’t even care if anyone catches him staring because his mind is purely filled with Ryujin. Which sounds cheesy and extremely cliche, but Changbin literally doesn’t care. 

He only cares about the way Ryujin’s smile seems to linger with a different kind of fondness that he and his friends usually see. It sends a warm feeling throughout Changbin’s chest, pride filling his heart at the realisation of how much she likes the jacket. 

The rest of the night goes by as a blur. Changbin’s more preoccupied with seeing how nicely the sleeves of the jacket fit on Ryujin’s arms than he is about what Jisung had gotten from you; which was probably a new case for his blunts since his old one was falling apart after Chan accidentally drove over it a few weeks ago. 

And by the time everyone’s indulging in Felix’s cocktails closer towards midnight, Changbin finds himself with Jisung in the garden with cigarettes in their hands. 

“That jacket you got for her was great, dude,” Jisung claims as he exhales, smoke blowing past his lips and into the cold night air. Snow freely falls from the sky and gathers on the ground, but the heat from their cigarettes seem enough to keep them warm. 

“She needed a new one, so I settled that for her,” Changbin shrugs, voice soft as he lets out a small hiss from the cold that bites at his ears. 

“But a jacket that she’s just so happened to want for a while? That’s a bit much,” he chuckles. 

“She mentioned it a few times before,” he says softly. 

“How did she win your heart when that one guy from the debate club failed?” Jisung laughs. 

“Ryujin’s… different.”

“How so?” 

“She doesn’t care about what I did back then. The guy from the debate club ran away the moment I told him my mother was in prison, but Ryujin… she actually makes me feel like I can forget my past,” Changbin explains. 

“That’s fair,” Jisung hums. He takes one final drag from his cigarette before putting it out against his case and tossing it into the garbage bin right beside them. “Come inside before you freeze, old man.”

“Fuck you, Sung,” he laughs. “Chan’s the old man.” 

“And I remind him every chance I get,” Jisung laughs as well right before he disappears behind the sliding door, leaving Changbin to his own company with the cigarette keeping him warm along with his puffy black winter coat. 

It’s what Changbin likes to call serenity among chaos; which is basically his fancy way of finding peace and silence whenever he’s with his loud and rambunctious friends. His serenity typically includes times whenever he gets to smoke outside in anyone’s garden or balcony, giving himself time to process whatever his friends had put him through. 

Ryujin slides out from the door and steps out into the cold, her feet slipping into her shoes clumsily as she steps onto the snow that covers the garden. 

“Am I interrupting?”

Changbin turns around and he’s about to put his cigarette out when Ryujin shakes her head and places her hand on his arm gently.

“You know that I don’t mind,” she chuckles. Ryujin buries her hands deep into the pockets of her new jacket and lets out a contented sigh as she looks up at the sky. “It’s really nice out tonight.”

“It’s perfect for a smoke, actually,” Changbin says with a small laugh. 

“I see why you guys are always trying to smoke when it’s snowing. I really don’t blame you guys—it probably feels really nice for you.” Ryujin turns to him, the same smile that makes Changbin’s heart pound adorning her face. “I didn’t get a chance to thank you just now, so I thought I’d take the chance now; thank you for the jacket, Bin. I love it.”

“I’m glad you do, Jin.” Changbin puts his finished cigarette out against the snow before flicking the butt into the garbage bin, “I couldn’t resist the opportunity.” 

Ryujin turns away from him and looks up at the sky, her eyes closing as she basks in the comforting feeling of the snow as it flutters and melts on her skin. There’s a different kind of warmth that fills her whenever it snows despite how cold it gets, but it’s more than enough to get her more than happy with her environment. 

Changbin watches as she does. There’s a different feeling that he gets whenever he’s around her as compared to all of the crushes he’s had before and he’s starting to think that what he feels is definitely love. 

“If I asked you out on a date, would you say yes?” 

“What kind of a question is that?” Ryujin laughs as she lowers her head. 

“A curious kind,” Changbin chuckles nervously. 

She turns to him and gives him a small smile. The dread that had been filling her for the past few weeks is starting to overcome every other feeling in her body as she realises that the time has come. 

“I’m asexual, Changbin,” she claims softly. “And I’m still trying to figure some things out, so I don’t know how well it would turn out if I dove into a relationship now.”

Changbin’s eyes widen slightly at the confession. It wasn’t exactly what he was hoping for, but it also isn’t exactly a complete rejection. 

“What if I said I would wait for you, then?” 

“I can’t stop you if you’re willing.” Ryujin turns to him and Changbin nods, avoiding eye contact with her as he thinks it over. A moment passes before he nods once again, more sure this time, and smiles. 

“I’ll wait for you, Ryujin.” 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

vii. 

It’s a strange game, Changbin thinks. His third year has already begun and Ryujin still hasn’t seemed to have acted on anything despite constantly being close with him. He truly doesn’t mind the closeness and he knows he has more than enough patience to wait for her, but it also feels like it’s killing him from the inside waiting for some kind of an answer from her. 

His waiting has actually also included an, slightly embarrassing, accumulation in his browser history of questions that he hoped could help him just a little bit.

Just so that he can try to understand more of how to approach Ryujiin’s sexuality in the perspective of someone who has had plenty sexual experience and someone who honestly enjoys sex quite a lot.

Raisha and Chan had graduated and with a few tears, Chan had asked Changbin to just wait for as long as his heart allowed him to. Jisung, on the other hand, stays as cooped up in his room as he always is, and with the second year load coming in, Jisung still doesn’t seem any busier than he was the year before. 

Time oddly moves extremely quickly when Changbin’s preoccupied with his studies, music, and trying to cope with his feelings, but he doesn’t seem to mind how quickly it’s moving. The only problem he really has is that he’s scared of if he graduates before Ryujin can actually comfortably make a decision; which actually sounds really bad considering that she’s making him wait all this time, but Changbin doesn’t care. He’ll wait for her for as long as it takes and he knows she likes him back. 

She just needs to settle some of her own issues. 

And he’s fine with it. Hell, Changbin’s been taking the opportunity to write sad, cheesy love songs that at least gives him, Jisung, and Chan some kind of musical content. 

“I thought I said you didn’t have to,” Ryujin sighs as she pulls the door open, unable to hold back the smile that makes its way onto her face. Changbin stands at her doorstep with a plastic bag of takeout and a few drinks, a toothy grin on his face.

“It’s my treat,” he hums.

Ryujin doesn’t have the heart to decline when he’s made the effort all the way to her apartment; which is also something that’s kept her from rejecting him completely. She thinks that if he’s willing enough to wait until she can settle her thoughts, then she’ll let him. Ryujin can’t exactly stop Changbin from doing what he wants and the only time she stopped him was when he was going back on old habits. 

And Changbin had never been scolded so hard before in his entire life. 

“No classes today?” Ryujin asks as she closes the door behind the both of them. 

“I just had a few—nothing too tiring. I did also end up in the music studio for most of the evening with Jisung, but we ended up playing with whatever Chan sent us last week.”

“Is he still working on the same track?” 

“Doesn’t seem like we’re making any breakthroughs with that anytime soon,” Changbin sighs, placing the plastic bag onto the kitchen counter and pulling the plastic containers out of it. 

Truthfully, Changbin has the lyrics to make the song come together. He just doesn’t want to show it to Chan or Jisung because he’s pretty sure they have a bet going on about when his next love song for Ryujin will come about. And he doesn’t exactly have an ego strong enough to go through watching whoever wins because Chan and Jisung have their own ways in embarrassing him whenever the three of them are together. 

Raisha doesn’t take part in their bets, though. She usually sits on the sidelines, curled up to Chan’s side as she tries to reassure whoever’s the topic of the bet that he’s just friends with an asshole and that she’ll put in money whenever it’s Chan’s turn to be bet on. 

“Last time I spoke to Raisha, she said that Chan was banging his head against walls trying to finish one of your tracks,” Ryujin chuckles. 

“That’s an exaggeration,” Changbin corrects her with a laugh. “He’s only ever banged his head against the table.”

“That does not make it any better,” she laughs. “Come on. We can eat in the living room and watch something. Yeji is letting me use her Netflix account.” 

“Netflix and chill?” Changbin raises an eyebrow jokingly, earning a snort and a smack from Ryujin. 

“The safe for work version.”  Ryujin grabs a pair of glasses from her cabinet before taking two of the soju bottles from the bag and making her way to the living room with Changbin following.

Ryujin’s apartment isn’t that big. It’s honestly perfect for a university student in a one bedroom apartment. She has enough money to actually afford something slightly bigger than a studio since she does actually cook on her own time and enjoys the view from her balcony. 

It’s small and it’s cosy; which is something that Changbin came to appreciate after Ryujin had been more open to him being in her apartment. It took a few months of them knowing each other before she actually invited him over. Just him. 

Changbin revels in the fact that Ryujin’s becoming more and more comfortable with his presence—albeit slowly—and he loves being able to be around for her. He honestly knows that he would much rather be friends with her than to lose her over something as minute as heartache. 

Ryujin has also outwardly told him so many times that he doesn’t have to wait around and hang out if he doesn’t want to, but Changbin proves to be as loyal as ever. He thinks he can make it through without sexual intimacy, so he’s willing to try if it means he gets to be with her. 

“Oh,” Ryujin hums just as she sits on her couch, “I forgot to show you this just now. I thought you’d find it interesting.” She picks her phone up from the coffee table and hands it to Changbin. “We haven’t gone to a live show since last year. I thought maybe you’d want to check this one out, but Felix doesn’t bring his car around to campus anymore and Chan’s not here, so we’d probably have to walk or catch a bus there.”

“A live gig?” He looks at the phone for a moment before passing it back to Ryujin. “Send it to Jeongin. He and Seungmin seem more into these things than we are.” 

“More fun when Chan and Raisah were around?” 

“Chan and Raisha were more mediators than they were doing anything. Raisha was Chan’s enabler, but she also made sure we didn’t do anything too stupid,” Changbin chuckles. He plops himself on the other end of the couch, legs comfortably crossed beneath him as Ryujin starts scrolling through her Netflix. 

“Raisha is lovely,” she hums absentmindedly. “I think if she hadn’t been around that night, I wouldn’t have actually become so close to you guys.” 

“She really is something else.” 

Changbin glances at the way Ryujin settles on her couch, a large hoodie hanging from her shoulders in a way that seems to engulf her completely. She always seems to find a way to appear as cosy as everything around her seems; something that Changbin thinks he adores the most about her. Ryujin has a way of making everything feel comfortable—something in her energy just calms whatever goes raging from within him and puts out whatever fires he has going on.  

“What are you going to do after you graduate?” Ryujin asks after the first ten minutes of Frozen. 

“I might take my masters here, actually,” Changbin answers with a shrug. “It feels worth it. I could specialise in something that can help out with our music.” 

“As long as you’re happy with it,” she hums. 

Silence settles between the two as the sounds of the movie fills the air and lights up Ryujin’s, otherwise, dark living room. Changbin has found himself in this situation a lot recently and it’s a scene that he finds the most comforting in the past few weeks. 

A movie playing, food in their hands—just the two of them. 

Sometimes, Ryujin would move over to his side of the couch to cuddle up into him; which had led to a few talks between the two where she would clarify that she’s asexual not aromantic… which also gave Changbin a few things to look into before finding out that an asexual person doesn’t necessarily mean they’d turn away romantic intimacy. 

Which is actually happening right now as Ryujin puts down her empty container onto the coffee table—right beside Changbin’s—and moves onto his side of the couch to cuddle with him. Changbin accepts the act and wraps his arm around her shoulders as they continue watching the movie in relative silence.

“Can I ask you something?” Changbin’s voice fills the soft air of the living room and it makes Ryujin hum in response. “Are you… open to kissing?” 

Ryujin blinks a few times before she turns her head and pulls away slightly to look Changbin in the eye, only to be faced with the bright red shade of his cheeks and the avoidant gaze of his eyes at the question. 

“I-I mean, there are non-sexual kisses—romantic gestures, I mean. So, I wouldn't necessarily be turned away by that idea.”  

“Does that mean… I’m allowed to kiss you?” 

Ryujin doesn’t think she breathes for the next few seconds as she stares at Changbin with the widest fucking eyes he’s ever seen in his entire life. He’s about to take the question back when he sees the way her face turns as red as his and he stumbles over his words as his back straightens, shooting upright to try and take whatever he’s asked back in fear of having made her uncomfortable. 

But Ryujin quickly shakes her head and holds onto his hand to calm him down slightly. 

“I-It’s fine!” she squeaks as she sits slightly closer to Changbin. “It— It’s a valid question. I’m actually glad that you’ve asked instead of going straight for it.” Her fingers push back her straight hair behind her ear before she looks at Changbin and smiles reassuringly. 

Ryujin swallows nervously, hesitantly leaning forward before placing a quick kiss against Changbin’s cheek; the action so quick that Changbin feels as though he barely even felt it and she had already pulled away. 

She avoids eye contact with him as a whole after kissing his cheek, sitting on the couch as a sense of embarrassment and sheepishness fills the air. Ryujin hadn’t done it because Changbin had mentioned it—god, no. She knows better than that, but she did it because it’s something that she’s been wanting to do for a while. It isn’t a lot, but it’s somewhat of a way for her to tell Changbin that she’s ready to progress a bit further. 

“Y-You—” Changbin’s hand flies to the cheek Ryujin had kissed as he stares at her with wide eyes. 

“It’s… I didn’t do it because you asked. I-I did it because I wanted to,” she blurts out, wanting to reassure him as much as possible because she knows that Changbin has a tendency to worry about her decisions.

“T-That’s not—I’m sure you—uhm—” Changbin coughs awkwardly—almost too violently—that causes him to actually start coughing because now his sad little smoker lungs are suffering. 

Ryujin panics from beside him as he, oh so desperately, tries to stop his coughing, hand reaching out for the glass of water on the coffee table to chug water and ease the irritation in his throat. 

“I’m fine,” he croaks out when he sees the way her hands basically scramble to hover over him. 

“Are you sure?” she questions softly.

“I’m fine,” Changbin repeats to reassure her as he puts the glass back down onto the table. “I-I just wasn’t expecting it.” He lets out a sheepish laugh afterwards, hand rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly before he clears his throat and looks at her. “C-Can you do that again?” 

“W-What?” 

“The kiss.” 

Ryujin’s face turns an unimaginable shade of red that has Changibn’s own skin flushing as well. But she leans in once again and kisses his cheek once again, lips lingering against his skin for a moment longer than before, and she pulls away. 

“That’s… that’s nice,” Changbin confesses with a nervous laugh right after. 

“Y-You think so?” Ryujin smiles slightly, her lips lopsided at his confession. 

“Yeah. I like that.” 

Changbin smiles widely when Ryujin’s own smile grows, his hand reaching out to pat her head gently and coax her back into his arms as they continue watching the movie. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

viii. 

Binniezz 🖤: I’m outside your building apartment  Should be up there soon

Jinz 🤍 : Alright  Jeongin gave me some leftover mac n cheese btw  So we’re having that for dinner

Changbin’s regular routine of visiting Ryujin’s apartment every few nights for movies and dinner has turned into something that he’s extremely happy with. Occasionally, he would end up sleeping over; which has also led to Ryujin clearing out some space in her closet for his clothes so that he wouldn’t always have to make the trip back to the house he shared with Felix in the dead of night. 

It also gives Ryujin more freedom in actually inviting over at night whenever she decided she didn’t want him to go so soon. So, here Changbin is: walking towards Ryujin’s apartment building at eight p.m. when he should really be at home trying to finish one of his assignments. 

Spring is quickly coming around, which means that Changbin’s graduation is only getting closer and closer, but he really doesn’t want to leave just yet. He takes the moment to look up at the building for a moment as the idea of graduating comes across his mind. 

Changbin really doesn’t want to graduate. 

He has the chance to apply for his masters at his current university, but he also knows that doing that would mean he’s taking it just to stick around a bit longer for Ryujin. 

He lets out a sigh as the building gets closer, but a familiar sound makes Changbin halt in his steps. 

Smack

“P-Please, I-I’ll pay you back soon!” 

The pleads are followed by another bone crunching smack that makes Changbin lift his head at the alleyway ahead of him; right beside Ryujin’s apartment building. The sound’s too familiar for him to want to make any sort of other explanation because someone is definitely being beat up in that alley. 

He takes a step forward to see three men crowded around another who sits on the ground. Even in the darkness, Changbin’s able to note the cuts that ooze blood down the guy’s face, dripping onto the concrete floor as one of the three men pick him up by the collar once again and spit directly on his face. 

Changbin shouldn’t get involved; he knows he shouldn’t. If he knows anything about gangs or these sorts of groups it’s that they never want anyone getting involved when they shouldn’t. But as Changbin stands there, he starts feeling sorry for the poor bastard being beat up. 

His hand nervously curls and uncurls by his side before he decides that, maybe tonight, he’ll play a hero for the poor guy and give him more time to do whatever he needs to. 

“Leave him alone.” 

Changbin takes a full step into the alley and all three of the men turn to look at him. 

“Who are you?” one of them sneers.

“Doesn’t matter. Leave the poor guy alone. You can get your money back another time,” Changbin says calmly as he looks the guy in the eye. 

“Pack your ego and get the fuck out of here.” 

Now, Changbin knows that they could’ve easily done this any other way. 

But he’s been in way too many ‘kill or be killed’ situations to want to settle this any other way, so before Changbin can even think, he’s punched the first man in the stomach. Everything happens so quickly—when he manages to get the first man to the ground, another comes and punches him square in the face. 

The attack is so quick that Changbin’s head is thrown backwards for a second, the dull aching in his nose starting to become more and more present as blood slowly starts to drip down his lips and onto his chin.

“You fucking dumbass,” Changbin scoffs before he grabs the man by the collars and brings him down to knee him directly in the stomach before slamming him against the wall. The third and final of them charges towards Changbin, but the rugby player’s had too much experience with people charging towards him that all he does is charge back, arms wrapping around his waist and tackling him to the floor. 

He briefly looks up at the man who’s cowering on the floor and jerks his head at the entrance of the alley, the man not hesitating to scramble to his feet and dash out at the opportunity. 

“Fucking beating up a helpless guy, huh? You think it’s fucking fun?” Changbin seethes as he repeatedly throws punches to the man’s face. 

The feeling of his fists slamming against the guy’s face sends a rush of adrenaline through Changbin’s veins that he hasn’t realised he’s missed so. Fucking. Much. The feeling of bones crunching by the actions of his hands makes him feel a sense of power that he never knew he felt like he needed. 

Even when the man stopped moving, body limped underneath Changbin’s pure will, he didn't stop. Even when he stops fighting back completely, Changbin doesn’t stop. 

It’s too satisfying. It’s too fucking powerful. 

And he keeps going; blood covering his knuckles and splattering up to his neck and face the more he goes. All Changbin smells is the scent of blood; the familiar scent of what is probably already a corpse filling the air and surrounding him. There’s no sense of stopping in his body. 

He doesn’t even realise how long it’s been until a familiar voice snaps him out of his trance and Changbin can feel his whole world crashing down.

“Changbin?” 

His entire body stops moving. His arm is halfway into the air when he hears her voice ringing in his ears, voice echoing off of the brick walls. 

Changbin’s fucked up. 

He’s suddenly hyper aware of the way he’s breathing as he slowly turns around to see Ryujin standing at the entrance to the alleyway, hands limp by her side as she stares at him with, what he can only describe as horror, on her face. Changbin finally looks down at the man and he feels his blood running cold when he sees what he’s done. 

“Fuck,” he shakily breathes out, jolting away from him. “F-Fuck, Ryujin.” Changbin turns around and his arms reach towards her but she stumbles backwards instead. 

“W-What the fuck?”  Ryujin scoffs, shaking her head and turning around. 

“Ryujin, wait,” Changbin scrambles off of the ground and chases after her. “Ryujin! Please, let me explain!” He stops in front of her and she stares at him in disbelief. “Please, let me explain. T-They were beating him up a-and the poor guy was harmless!”

“Did you throw the first hit?” 

“W-What?” 

Ryujin crosses her arms over her chest and takes a deep breath.

“Did you throw the first hit, Changbin?” 

“I-I… Ryujin, you don’t understand…” he breathes out. “I-I had no choice.” 

“He wasn’t moving. I understand if you were trying to save that guy, but Changbin, you probably just killed someone.” Her hands flail about to emphasise her point and she takes a step closer to him as she does. “You were the one who said that you were trying to turn over a new page. You were the one who said that the thing that scares you the most about yourself is your ability to kill.”

“I didn’t kill him!” Changbin defends quickly. 

“Even if you were protecting someone, why did you keep going even when he stopped moving?” 

He doesn’t say anything, only staring at Ryujin as he realises how deep of a hole he’s just dug himself. 

“Were you enjoying it?” 

Changbin’s lips purse together and he looks away from her. Ryujin lets out a soft sigh. She’s less mad than she was before because now she’s honestly just disappointed. 

And seeing it in her eyes is what makes Changbin feel even worse than he already did before. 

“I-I don’t know what happened. I just knew that he needed help and that I was right there. Even if I hadn’t thrown the first punch, they would’ve started the fight anyway.” 

“You being the person who threw the first punch goes against you not wanting to go back on your old habits, Bin,” Ryujin claims softly. “You said you were going to try and move forward from your past. I never judged you for what you did then and you know that I wouldn’t try to question any of your choices now. But Changbin…” 

“I know. I-I pushed too far. I knew he wasn’t moving, but… I couldn’t stop myself. I-I’m sorry—I know it doesn’t mean anything, but I really didn’t mean for any of this to happen. And I’m sorry that you had to see that.” 

She stares at him for a moment, thinking of the next thing to do before her arms uncross and she lets out a softer sigh. Ryujin reaches out to hold onto his hands, lifting his knuckles up so that she can actually see the damage on his skin, thumb brushing away some of the blood and over the splitting ends of his knuckles. 

“Come on. I have a first aid kit in my bathroom that we can use,” she gently urges while guiding Changbin towards the entrance to the building. 

The next hour or so happens quietly. Ryujin brings Changbin up into her apartment and sits him on the couch as she cleans up the blood and wounds on his knuckles before he disappears to wash the blood off of his entire body and changes into something clean; something that he had left in her closet. 

As Changbin sits on the couch, silently listening as Ryujin shuffles around her kitchen, he’s partially prepared for her to tell him that she thinks it’s horrible that he did what he did. He’s waiting for her to tell him to leave after tonight because she’s scared of him. 

But all she does is place a bowl of heated up mac n cheese on the table along with a can of Sprite before sitting beside him with her own bowl in her hands. 

Changbin stares at her in a moment, almost in awe at the realisation that Ryujin’s simply going to carry on. 

“If you’re wondering,” she speaks up after a few minutes of feeling his eyes boring into the side of her face, “this is only a hiccup in whatever journey you’re on—whatever journey that we’re on. You had good intentions. You just wanted to help him.”  Ryujin pauses for a moment to stick a spoonful of the pasta into her mouth before she turns to Changbin and smiles softly. “You still have a long way to go and I’m not leaving you anytime soon.” 

Changbin doesn’t say anything at first. He reaches over to pick up the bowl off of the coffee table and leans back on his side of the sofa as he processes Ryujin’s words. 

He smiles and nods, “thank you, Ryujin.” 

Silence settles between the two as they continue watching whatever Ryujin had put on until her bowl is empty and she stands up to make her way to the kitchen. Instead of going straight from her side, however, Ryujin rounds to Changbin’s side of the couch and drapes her arm over his shoulder. She leans down and presses a kiss to the side of his head. 

“I’m proud of you for trying to help,” Ryujin says softly against him before disappearing into the kitchen, leaving Changbin flustered as he sits on the couch. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

ix.

“Here,” Changbin says as he places the USB right next to Ryujin’s laptop and takes a seat across from her at the table. 

“Thank you,” she hums absentmindedly while clicking away at the keyboard. 

“Why don’t you just get a new one? I thought you needed one anyway,” Jisung asks just as he sticks a whole chocolate chip muffin into his mouth, cheeks puffing akin to that of a squirrel. 

“I just need to clear some space on my hard drive, but I need a USB now. I thought I’ll just clear it out next week after I’m done with this project and then I won’t need to buy a new one at all,” Ryujin explains as she takes the USB and holds it up into the air, “this way, I get to save on some cash for a trip to the beach.” She smiles at the two before sticking it into the pocket of her bomber jacket. 

“You know what? We could probably convince Chan to pick us up and spend a few days at the beach. Rent a nice place or a hotel if we have enough cash put together.” 

“That’s actually not that bad of an idea,” Changbin claims as he lifts his head to look at Jisung. 

“We could just see if Chan and Raisha are free for a few days and just ask them if they’re down.” 

“Oh, Raisha loves the beach, so it won’t be that hard to convince Chan if she wants to go,” Ryujin laughs. “We could probably do this weekend. It’s not like anything’s stopping us.”  

The three of them exchange a look before racing for their phones. 

“Let me ask him first! He’s nicer to me!” Jisung practically begs as he pulls up Chan’s contact number. 

“Hold on—at least let me get Raisha on this first!” Ryujin argues, hands fumbling with her own.

“Fuck it. I’m making a group chat with everyone and that’s how we ask both of them,” Changbin laughs. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Somehow, the group chat was the most effective method out of all of them because Changbin had managed to tag Raisha almost immediately which didn’t leave Chan that many options because he simply can’t say no to his girlfriend. 

Which leads Ryujin to her current situation; cramming in the last few bits of her project so that she can actually have the weekend off without thinking about any work. She’s been pushing it to some of the final moments rather than slowly making her way through it the way she naturally would, which means that Ryujin’s not given herself that Jisung had chosen one of the worst possible times to decide he wants to go to the beach. 

But the project isn’t going to stop Ryujin from going to the beach. She’d really rather rip her hair out than miss a trip because she knows that she can do this on time.

Changbin snores away in her bed as she stays hunched over her laptop at her desk, thumbnail caught between her teeth as she plugs his USB into her laptop and opens up the files. 

She pauses for a moment. 

♫ The Universe Hates Me ♫ 

Ryujin breathes out a laugh. Of course Changbin would name his music files something like this. It would probably keep people away, but Ryujin stares at it as curiosity fills her. She peeks over her shoulder and at Changbin, his snores only seeming to get louder the more he stays asleep, before she turns back and clicks open the file. 

An array of notepads fill the file; half unlabelled while the other half labelled with titles that sound more like Changbin’s thoughts as he wrote them down. 

Lyrics (important)

Lyrics Chan wants by the end of the week

Jisung’s a fucking psychopath who wrote this within an hour

Work on this, you bitch 

Don’t forget

!!!!!!!!!!!!!DON’T FORGET THIS ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m having a stroke making this 

Ryujin smiles to herself as she scrolls through the files until one catches her eye. 

Sorry I love you question mark

The file opens up to a notepad of lyrics, but they make Ryujin’s smile drop the more she reads it. A sense of sadness washes over her the more the she reads, especially with the date the file was last edited. 

It wasn’t long after they had met, which means that Changbin had these lyrics locked away in his vault for the past year or so. The further into the lyrics she gets, the more Ryujin feels her chest constricting. Is this how he had felt the entire time? She hadn’t realised just how much Changbin liked her in the beginning and she assumed it was a small crush. 

But to see it written out as lyrics? 

He had written a whole song for her. 

And the only reason Ryujin’s certain it’s about her is because Changbin was smart enough to leave her name at the end of the damn thing. 

I’ll wait for you, Jins. I promise

Her hand raises to cover her mouth when she feels her eyes starting to sting. Even now, Ryujin actually doubts how much Changbin likes her because she’s absolutely certain that he would be turned down by the idea of her not wanting anything sexual. 

But it seems that he really doesn’t seem to mind it at all. 

And Ryujin doesn’t know if that relieves her or makes her heart ache even more. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“Don’t be a dick—come on!" Jisung whines as he chases after Chan and into the water, waves crashing against them as they wade further into the water. 

Chan had been ever so sweet to take Jisung’s phone with him and charge towards the water while Raisha stays comfortable on the beach mat while she rubs sunscreen onto herself. 

“Chan! You haven’t put on any sunscreen!” she calls when she looks up, sighing at the realisation that Chan’s already in the water and that his sunburn will later on become her problem as well. 

“Why does he think that’s a good idea?” Ryujin chuckles as she leans back on her arms with an umbrella shielding her body from the Sun. 

“Chan thinks it’s funny; not a good idea,” Raisha corrects her with a laugh. “And when he accidentally ends up dropping it into the water, Jisung’s going to go berserk and Chan’s going to buy him a new phone instead.”  

“How predictable is that?” Changbing laughs, overhearing their conversation as he approaches them from the house that they were staying in over the weekend. 

“Chan’s more responsible than that,” she hums. Raisha watches fondly as Chan races out of the water with Jisung following closely behind, hands flailing towards him as his attempts to retrieve his phone fail repeatedly. 

“Chan, please! Be careful with it!” Jisung whines as he watches Chan sprint to the other side of the beach. “Raisha! He’s being mean!” he whines and turns to Raisha with a big pout on his face and his feet kicking the sand like a child. 

Raisha sighs and looks at Chan who sticks his tongue out at Jisung. 

“Chan, have a little compassion for the poor boy,” she chuckles loudly enough for her boyfriend to hear. He turns to her and scoffs, frowning and pouting before he obliges. Chan begrudgingly makes his way over to Jisung and hands his phone back before trudging towards Raisha, plopping himself beside her to let her towel dry his back and arms. 

“She has you on a leash, doesn’t she?” Ryujin giggles when she sees how frowny Chan is being. 

“Fuck you,” he grumbles while Raisha gently rubs the sunscreen onto the skin of his broad back, earning a smack from her. 

“Be nicer, Channie,” she scolds, earning yet another grumble from the man. 

“Yeah, ‘Channie’,” Jisung mocks. Chan throws a glare in his direction but the younger man only giggles mischievously and hides behind Raisha. 

The five of them had gotten extremely lucky when Raisha’s friend had offered to let them stay at his beach house for the weekend, claiming that it should get some form of use since he wouldn’t be there for another year or so. And Raisha had accepted without much hesitation because she’s the kind to not turn down offers as long as they don’t come with favours, and she had known her colleague long enough to trust that he was offering them his house without any sort of underlying reason. 

Especially since he had met Chan at a handful of work events and the broad shouldered man, who typically glares at anyone who tries to approach Raisha, is more than enough to scare off anyone who would even think to harm his beloved darling. 

Changbin slings his arms over Ryujin’s shoulders as they stare at the ocean, letting Chan grumble inaudibly to himself while Raisha continues to slather him with sunscreen and Jisung continues to tease him because he knows that Chan can’t do anything about it. 

“What if we buy a kite?” Ryujin suggests suddenly when she feels the wind blowing rather strongly. 

“We could probably find someone selling a kite here. Kids love flying kites on beaches,” Chan mumbles. 

“I’m borrowing your car,” Changbin says as he stands up and grabs the car keys out of Raisha’s woven bag. “Come on.” He extends his hand towards Ryujin who watches him, eyebrows raised from underneath her sunglasses as she does. 

“What? No, you’re not taking my car,” Chan whips his head around. 

“Let him take it. They barely check for licences here and I doubt that these two would be going anywhere far,” Raisha says motherly as she leans forward to kiss Chan on the cheek, the action making him melt almost instantly. 

“Fine. Just don’t do anything stupid.”

At Chan’s permission, Ryujin agrees with less hesitation. She holds onto Changbin’s hand and allows him to pull her up as she grabs her t-shirt off of the mat and throws it over her bathing suit. 

“We could probably find a place nearby with kites and other things to play with on the beach,” Changbin hums as they make their way towards the house to grab their bags and climb into Chan’s black pickup truck.

“Could we get some snacks, too?” 

“There’s a barbecue bench outside of the house, right?”

“Saw it on the way to the beach, yeah.”

“Then, let’s get some food for a barbecue, too.”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“Let’s go!” Jisung giggles loudly as he watches Chan do pushups while Raisha sits on his back. 

“Five more, buddy, come on!” Changbin encourages, clapping as the oldest of them continues to push through as though his girlfriend truly weighs nothing as she proudly sits on him. 

“Thirty pushups with Raisha on my back: done!” Chan cheers as Raisha climbs off of him. 

“I told you he could do it,” she giggles. Her hand reaches underneath his jaw to guide him towards her where she presses a kiss against his lips. “Good job, darling.” 

Chan’s entire face turns red as he lets out a bashful giggle at the praise. 

“God, everything this woman says to him has his dick shooting upright,” Changbin snorts as he slings his arm over Ryujin’s shoulders as they sit on the brick bench. 

There’s more drinks in Jisung than the two of them combined, but they’ve both created a silent agreement to stay the most sober of the bunch considering how much Chan and Raisha drink when only the five of them are together. 

“Oh, please, like you don’t get the same reaction whenever Ryujin touches your face,” Chan slurs and points his finger lazily at Changbin. 

“Don’t say that, you’ll make Ryujin uncomfortable,” Raisha scolds and smacks the back of his head lightly. 

“It’s not like I’m making these kinds of jokes about her!” he whines loudly. 

“It’s still sexual, Chan!”

“But it’s not directly about her!”

“Should I say something?” Ryujin laughs while glancing at Changbin. 

“No, no, let them be,” he chuckles with a wave of his hand. 

Changbin stands up after a moment and turns the meat over on the grill, Ryujin standing as well with the plastic plates for him to move them onto once they’re cooked. They would’ve asked Jisung to help out, but he’s managed to blaze himself up almost completely in the past hour or two and he doesn’t seem to be able to do anything else other than make teasing comments at Chan and giggle away with a can of beer in the other hand. 

“Come on, guys, the meat’s ready,” Changbin announces as he piles them onto the plate in Ryujin’s hands. 

“Meat!” Jisung excitedly exclaims as he shoots upright. He grabs a plate and grabs a few for himself before she can even put the plate down, eyes widening in shock at how sudden Jisung moved. Chan and Raisha grab their own servings and sit down on the ground together. 

“We should do more barbecues together and make Changbin grill,” Jisung claims with a mouthful.  

“You’re right,” Chan agrees the moment he sticks a slice of the beef into his mouth. “This is so fucking good—holy shit.” 

“Yeah, eat that shit up, guys. It’s a rare occurrence,” Changbin chuckles. 

“Not if you’re Ryujin,” he huffs. 

“Asshole happily cooks for his girlfriend, but not for his friends,” Jisung scoffs in agreement. “I could never convince him to actually do something like that for me.” 

“That’s because Ryujin treats me with love and care. She gets special treatment,” Changbin argues with a mocking tone. 

“Aish, don’t do that to him,” she quickly scolds softly and places her hand on his bicep, which makes his face soften immediately.

“My god, she’s the Raisha to your Chan,” Jisung’s jaw drops. 

“No, she is not,” he scoffs.

“We’re less responsible than those two are,” she quickly nods. 

“Those two fuck like rabbits, too!” 

“I don’t even like sex, Jisung!”

“Holy shit, I hit a nerve,” Jisung’s eyes widen as a small piece of meat falls out of his mouth and onto his plate. “Jeez, you guys really just… wow, okay.”

“I miss drunk Jisung. He’s sweeter and more thoughtful of his words,” Ryujin scoffs. 

“I miss when Jisung would only get high. He was funnier back then,” Changbin clicks his tongue in annoyance. 

“Now that he’s mixing weed and alcohol together, it’s not as fun,” Chan grumbles.

“You guys just don’t like this version of me,” Jisung groans right as he takes a drag from his blunt, “if you guys can’t handle me now. Then you don’t deserve me when I’m sober!” He lets out a loud grunt before chugging the rest of his beer right after. 

Changbin and Ryujin let out a sigh at the same time as they turn to look at each other, unable to contain their giggles as they continue munching away at their meat. 

The meat quickly disappears and Changbin puts the grill out while he and Ryujin usher their friends back into the house to sober up, the both of them taking their time to clean up the area. 

“I keep forgetting that they get drunk when it’s just us,” Ryujin chuckles as she stacks the used plates. 

“Chan can drink a lot when he doesn’t have to be the responsible one,” Changbin claims with a small laugh. “It surprised me the first time, but I realised that it probably means that he’s comfortable enough around us to let loose. He’s the kind of person who doesn’t know how to not take care of people, so knowing that he’s comfortable enough to let us handle ourselves is quite nice.” 

Ryujin breathes out a laugh and shakes her head slightly as gathers all of the plates. 

“I’ll get these cleaned up and then we can watch a movie with them,” she says softly. 

“Dude, I doubt they’re even awake,” he snorts loudly. “We can just spend the time watching a movie together.” Ryujin gives him a look and Changbin smiles sheepishly at her before leaning in to kiss her forehead gently, hand brushing down her hair that now brushes the middle of her back before he takes the plates out of her hands and walks towards the house. 

Ryujin stays frozen in her spot with her face and neck red, and her eyes wide. The grill is already clean and there’s no other trash on the outside, so there really isn’t anything else to do, but Ryujin doesn’t feel like going into the house just yet. 

She still has Changbin’s USB with her and she hasn’t been able to get the lyrics out of her head ever since she read them. Ryujin sits on the brick bench and picks her jacket up from the jacket, looking up at the moon as she thinks of how she’s going to approach Changbin with this. 

“Ryujin!’ Changbin calls as he steps back out of the house and approaches her slowly. “You coming?” 

She lets out a sigh and turns to him just as he stands beside her. Without saying anything, Ryujin pats the spot beside her and Changbin obliges in a heartbeat. He takes her hand in his and places it on his lap, his thumb gently running over the back of her knuckle, as her head turns back up to look at the sky. 

“I know about ‘sorry I love you question mark’,” Ryujin confesses after a moment. 

Changbin’s thumb stops moving for a moment. But instead of having any sort of a negative reaction—like she thought he would after invading his personal files—he breathes out a chuckle and sighs softly. 

“What do you think of it?” he asks. 

“It was a lot to take in at first,” she chuckles, her tone lacking the same lightness as Changbin’s. 

“Well, I was stupid enough to sign it off with your name at the end of it. So, I’m sorry if it made you feel too pressured or overwhelmed.” 

“Stop that,” Ryujin states and squeezes her eyes shut as guilt fills her heart. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You hadn’t done anything wrong in the beginning—you don’t have anything to be sorry about because it’s not something that you have complete control over.” 

“Then don’t feel sorry about my love,” Changbin says. He turns to Ryujin and smiles. “What I feel is my burden to bear and you have nothing to be sorry about. I feel what I feel because of my own heart. It’s not your fault that I fell in love and it’s not your fault that I’m in love with you as much as I am. I wrote ‘sorry I love you question mark’ when I was scared that I would overwhelm you and we were doing so well together as friends. I didn’t want to risk losing you as my friend.” 

He brings her hand up and presses the back of her palm against his chest. 

“Everything I’ve done up until now was to be with you. That was my decision. You make me feel like I can actually be better, Ryujin. And that’s something that I really appreciate. I love the way you make me feel and I hope that you can feel the way I do when I’m around. I want you to make you feel as loved and adored as I do.” 

Changbin smiles when he sees the way Ryujin’s eyes start to gloss over and her lips part slightly. 

“I love you, Ryujin—like a serious fucking amount. It’s insane,” he laughs. “And I’m happy with the place that we are at now.” 

“Are you sure that you can deal without the sex?” Ryujin asks softly as she looks at the way their hands are intertwined when Changbin lowers them to her lap. 

“I want to be with you enough to want to try,” Changbin claims. 

Ryujin feels warmth spreading throughout her chest as she looks at him. Her bottom lip quivers slightly as her eyes fill with more tears that slowly start to spill down her cheeks. 

Changbin smiles softly and reaches his hand over to wipe them away with his thumbs, “why are you crying, love?”

She only cries harder at the question. And it isn’t the cute kind of crying you get in movies because Ryujin fucking bawls with her cheek pressing into the palm of Changbin’s hand. It’s the kind of crying that sounds as ugly and snot-filled as it looks, but it only makes him smile as he wraps his arm around her and pulls Ryujin into his chest.

“Okay, okay,” he chuckles, hand brushing down her hair repeatedly to help calm her down, “cry it out, my love. Just keep crying it out.” 

“I-I love you, Changbin.” she wails against his chest loudly, sniffling and snorting right after. 

“I love you, too, Ryujin,” Changbin smiles. 

“Is that all it took?” Jisung mutters as he stares from the second floor window. Raisha and Chan are both looking from over his shoulder at the way Ryujin cries against Changbin, loudly confessing her love for the entire world to hear. 

“This is so cute,” Raisha coos as she watches the way Changbin seems to pepper the top of Ryujin’s head with gentle kisses. “Ugh, I love how sweet they are together.” 

“Only took them two years,” Chan snorts as he leans away, finally deciding to give the two their privacy. 

“How long do you think they’ll last?” 

“Jisung!” 

“What?! We bet on you guys! I feel like it’s fair that we give Changbin the same treatment!”

“They just confessed to each other, Jisung!” Raisha scoffs. 

“Changbin and Jeongin had no problem betting on you guys the moment you met!” Jisung defends. 

Chan shakes his head and continues to argue while Raisha sighs with her arms crossed over her chest, the two of them bickering away with Jisung as he tries his best to defend himself and start a bet. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

x.

Changbin stares at himself in the mirror. His entire body is exhausted, chest heaving as he tries to gather his breath. Sweat drips down the side of his face and he feels frustration creeping underneath his skin, crawling around his body as though a million spiders are trying to break free. 

He thought he could do it. 

He tried really fucking hard. 

But Changbin’s been feeling as though his heart has been missing something for a while and he didn’t realise what it was until he accidentally walked into you and Seungmin in the showers at the sports building. 

And as he stumbled out, the only thing he could think of is how sexually active the two of you are and how much he fucking misses the closeness of it. The last few nights that he’s spent at Ryujin’s apartment has made him feel like he’s going crazy. 

The amount of love inside of him that he struggles with showing her without doing it physically is killing him way more than he initially thought. 

But as Changbin stands in front of the mirror after trying to furiously wank his hard-on away in the past hour or so; it’s starting to become a bit of a problem for him. It hadn’t bothered him this much until a week ago and Changbin’s trying to figure out whether his suddenly raging libido is caused by something else or if it’s just the fact that he’s a really horny fucking guy who hasn’t gotten laid in the past year or so.

He lets out a frustrated sigh and wipes his hand down his face, staring at himself in the mirror as he puffs his cheeks out with air. 

Changbin needs sexual intimacy. It’s one of the only ways he can actually pour his love out. He needs to have sex. 

And it makes him feel disgusting. 

It makes him feel like he’s going against everything he had been reassuring Ryujin through the past year. How could he do this to her? How could he have spent so much time telling her that he’d be fine with it only to realise that he isn’t?! What kind of an asshole does that make him?! 

Changbin can’t do this to her. Not when they’ve already broken through their wall of fears together. He runs his hand into his hair and grips at it, pulling at the roots. 

Maybe he’s just a little stressed out with his masters. That’s definitely it! Right? He doesn’t need sexual intimacy as much as he thinks he does—he’s just overreacting! Right…?  

Changbin’s going to wait it out for a bit longer. Maybe it’s just a phase and he’ll get over his crying boner in a while. He just needs to give himself time. Maybe this is a sign that he needs to be in his own space for a bit. 

He takes a deep breath and washes his face with cold water. 

Changbin can wait. 

And he will. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“Dude,” Jisung nudges his arm. 

“What?” Changbin finally turns away from his laptop to look at him.

“I asked if you wanted to get dinner,” he claims. 

“Oh. Sure,” he nods and starts to close his laptop and clear his stuff into his bag.

“What’s up with you? You’ve been stand-offish the entire week,” Jisung mutters and gives Changbin a weird look. 

“I’ve just… had some things on my mind,” Changbin shakes his head and gives him a reassuring smile. Jisung lets his gaze linger for a moment longer before he slips his bag strap over his shoulder and heads towards the front door of the music studio.

Changbin stays seated for a moment longer as he tries to let his thoughts settle. Jisung leans against the wall right outside of the recording room, his head bumping against the wall lightly as he tries to figure out what’s been bothering his friend. Changbin had been acting odd for the past week and it’s been making the entire balance in the studio go off the rails. 

Nothing’s been properly made, Chan’s been bugging the two of them trying to figure out what’s wrong while Raisha plays the sweeter, more motherly card and gently asks Jisung whether something had happened since Changbin’s been M.I.A from their group chat ever since he started acting weird. 

“Come on,” Changbin hums as he brushes past Jisung, the younger man sighing before following after him. 

Changbin thinks that Jisung has a bit of an idea as to what’s going on because he’s been trying to cheer him up through basically everything; smokes, blunts, alcohol. But the dead giveaway was when Jisung offered to buy him a fleshlight, playing it off as a joke when his laugh came off as awkward and… sympathetic. Which makes Changbin feel only a little bit worse. 

But the guilt he gets from leaving Jisung in the dark is still overwhelmed by the pain he feels every time he sees Ryujin running towards him with the biggest smile on her face. It’s so fucking cheesy but Changbin swears that the entire world stops moving whenever he sees her smile. 

He thinks that nothing else matters more than her happiness. 

Speaking of which, Changbin hasn’t actually spent that much time with Ryujin in the past few weeks—claiming that he has some things he needs to think about and asked her not to worry. But, Ryujin being Ryujin… of course she worried about Changbin’s sudden shift in energy. She’s been trying to give him his space by not messaging him too often, only sending a few at the end of the day to ask how he’s doing and to wish him goodnight.  

But Changbin’s time alone has just made his realisation come by faster and it’s made it crash into him way worse than he thought it would: 

Changbin needs sexual intimacy. 

And Ryujin isn’t able to offer what he needs nor will Changbin ever ask of her to. 

“Changbin,” Jisung calls loudly. 

“What?” 

Changbin turns to him, but upon seeing the look on Jisung’s face, he realises that he must’ve gotten lost in his thoughts again.

“I asked what you felt like eating. We can grab the bus since it’s going further into the city tonight,” Jisung suggests.

“What would we eat in the city? There’s a lot of options in town,” Changbin answers with a shrug. 

“The city has nice views,” he hums.

“Can I invite Ryujin?” 

“To leave me as a third-wheel?” Jisung lets out an exaggerated gasp, jaw dropping and hand flying to his chest, before he laughs a moment after and nods, “of course you can. She’s nice.” 

“Okay, then let’s go into the city,” Changbin says as he pulls his phone out of his pocket. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Jisung feels like he physically wants to die. 

The air has been so. fucking. awkward. That Jisung feels as though he’d really rather be in another universe than this one. 

Ryujin and Changbin are sitting beside each other, opposite of Jisung at the table, as Changbin stares at the food while Ryujin eyes him with concern. 

She turns to Jisung questioningly, but he only shrugs and quickly sticks his cheeks with food to avoid having to explain any questions that she asks. 

“Changbin?” she calls gently while placing her hand on his shoulder, the act making him jolt slightly as he snaps out of his trance and turns to her. “Are you okay?” 

“Y-Yeah,” Changbin nods quickly. He immediately picks up his spoon and starts digging into his own bowl of noodles. Ryujin’s hand curls up slightly at his reaction, but she doesn’t really want to put Jisung in any more of a weirder position and instead decides to continue dinner despite knowing that something is bothering Changbin. 

Ryujin lowers her hand to the table and starts eating. Every so often, she glances at Changbin, but he’s too busy stuffing his face with food to actually say or notice anything; or so it seems. Jisung’s also trying his hardest to not be involved with whatever the hell is going on between the two as he sticks his cheeks full and stays preoccupied on his phone where he’s spilling about the entire encounter to Chan and Raisha privately. 

ShaSha: ?? Maybe he’s tired???  You know how Bin can get 

Channie: Yeah  He burns himself out really easily  Sometimes he doesn’t stop it  Just keep an eye on him for a while

Sungie: Okay???  But that literally doesn’t help the fact that he’s not even reacting to RYUJIN  You know?? Shin Ryujin??!!  The love of his life!!  The girl he wrote like half of our songs about!!!!  He’s not even LOOKING at her

ShaSha: Hmm

Channie: Just give him some space, Ji Try not to invade too much 

ShaSha: You don’t think it has something to do with Ryujin ? 

Channie: And that’s none of our business if it is!! 

ShaSha: Channie, I know you’re all about staying out of peoples’ business But these guys took SO LONG to get together  And Changbin obviously loves her sosososososososo much  I would hate it if something happened between them and we at least didn’t try to help them get through it 

Sungie: I think it is…

Channie: ?

Sungie: Yk how she’s  Asexual Right? 

ShaSha: Yeah  Changbin said he didn’t have any issues with that 

Sungie: Yeah but  Changbin’s not exactly active like  Yk Seungmin and (Y/n) 

Channie: Yah Changbin can’t have sex with people he doesn’t have an emotion Oh Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ShaSha: Oh no… 

Sungie: I think he finds it weird having sex with people he has no romantic attraction to But he has the romance with Ryujin Just not the sex

Channie: Shit That’s  Not sounding good 

ShaSha: What if he needs it more than we all thought he did

Channie: Then that means that Changbin really needs to do some thinking  Or he’s going to have to break up with her because she can’t fulfil his needs

Sungie: But that sounds so Mean…

ShaSha: No Jisungie You shouldn’t stay in a relationship with someone who can’t offer what you need And if Changbin needs that sort of physical intimacy with her  And he can’t  Then it means that he shouldn’t stay in the relationship or he’s going to have some major mental breakdowns

Channie: Some people can ignore the lack of sex  But some people need that intimacy bcs they need the physical touch yaknow  So I wouldn’t blame him if he needed it, it’s not his fault  And I wouldn’t blame Ryujin either  But I just hope that it works out okay between them

Sungie: … Do you think he’s only realising this now?

Channie: I think we should just let them play it out  And if Changbin needs us  He’ll tell us 

ShaSha: I don’t think there’s anything we can do in this situation, Sungie… Let’s just hope for the best

Jisung frowns before putting his phone away and finally looks up to see Changbin muttering something softly to Ryujin, to which she responds by hanging her head slightly closer to his. 

“Can we talk after this?” Ryujin questions, her voice soft enough to hide from Jisung’s ears. 

“Of course,” he nods. “I’ll walk you back to your apartment.” 

Jisung looks between the two when Ryujin pulls away slightly and smiles. Changbin returns the smile, but it’s quicker and almost… not as genuine. Which makes her smile slowly fade. 

And Jisung slowly sinks further into his seat as he wants nothing more than the Earth to just swallow him up. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

The walk back to Ryujin’s apartment from the bus stop right outside of campus is… more than awkward. It’s mostly silent between the two despite how desperately both of them want to break the tension. Changbin doesn’t know what he’s even supposed to say. 

And Ryujin already has a feeling she knows what he’s going to say. It’s not as if she didn’t see it coming, honestly. She was awake the night that Changbin was crying in the bathroom, staring at the door as her heart felt as though it was shattering into pieces at the realisation that Changbin can’t do it. 

Admittedly, the only reason that Ryujin had woken up that night was because Changbin wasn’t beside her like he usually is. She finds that she sleeps much better when she can subconsciously feel his arms wrapped around her as they sleep, the feeling of his warmth embracing her, sending a sense of comfort that she’s truly never felt before in her entire life. Just knowing that Changbin is there is enough to make her feel safe.

She doesn’t blame him and she’s trying so fucking hard to not blame herself. Despite the silence and the awkward energy, Changbin still holds onto Ryujin’s hand in silent reassurance. He really doesn’t want her to blame herself and he would hate if he was the reason for her feeling shit, so he’s trying to do this as gently as he possibly can. 

They reach her apartment and Changbin throws his jacket onto the couch, standing in the middle of her living room as he watches Ryujin move around her apartment to turn the lights on. 

“Balcony?” she suggests softly. 

Changbin blinks a few times before he smiles slightly and nods. 

God, this is horrible. 

He gets onto the balcony first and welcomes the air as it meets his skin. Changbin shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to compose himself as much as possible. The last thing he would want is to make himself cry because he knows that it would make it harder for the both of them if he did. Changbin takes the moment to himself to try and gather what he wants to say—which is quickly thrown out of the window when Ryujin steps out onto the balcony, still adorning the bomber jacket that she, so very, loves. 

The same jacket that Changbin had gifted to her. 

And somehow, knowing that Ryujin’s wearing it even now, Changbin feels as though everything within him is crumbling; ever so slowly—ever so painfully. 

The moon is high up in the sky, casting its glow onto the both of them as they both figure out how to talk. Changbin's thoughts are going a mile a minute as he tries to think of the best way to approach this. He opens his mouth, only to close it, and then opens it again, but sighs when he can’t seem to bring the words to leave past his lips. 

So Ryujin speaks first. 

“This isn’t working… is it?” Ryujin chuckles softly, her tone bittersweet. 

Changbin looks at her and forces out a laugh, “it’s not. I… I need to be able to share sexual intimacy. Not being able to do that feels like it’s eating me from the inside out.” He talks slowly. He thinks through his words carefully. But he knows that, at the end of the day, Ryujin will understand what he’s trying to say. 

“I know,” she sighs and turns to look at him. “If I can’t offer what you need, Bin, then this isn’t going to work at all.” 

Silence settles between the two. They’re sad—of course they fucking are—but the air isn’t as thick as Changbin had initially thought it would be. There’s something else that lingers. 

Acceptance.

“You know…” Changbin starts and turns to look at the Moon instead, “I think you’re the first person I’ve ever, truly, loved. And no matter what happens, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget you because you’ve managed to engrave yourself into my heart. I love you—like a lot—and I’m so glad that I stuck around.” 

“I love you, too,” she whispers, following his gaze at the sky, “thank you so much for being there. You didn’t have to, yet you still did; and for that, I will forever be grateful for you, Changbin.” 

“I’ll forever be grateful that you let me,” he laughs and turns to her. “Come.” Changbin reaches for her hand and pulls her into him, his hand gently resting at the back of her head as he kisses her forehead. 

He allows his lips to linger while Ryujin closes her eyes and relishes in the moment. It’s the last time they’ll ever be this close—this intimate—before their chapter has to close and a new one will be forced to begin; one where they will no longer be written together.

“I need to clear my stuff from your closet,” Changbin says as he finally pulls away, hands holding both sides of her face as he smiles and looks into her glossy eyes. 

“Okay,” Ryujin nods. He presses one more kiss against her cheek before he steps back into her apartment, Ryujin following behind and watching as he pulls a duffel bag he had left in her closet to start packing his clothes. 

She stays at the doorway as he does, willing herself not to cry and telling herself that this is nothing more than a step in her life that she has to take in order to grow. 

Everything happens for a reason, Ryujin thinks, as she watches Changbin stick the last of his hoodies into his bag. When he’s finished with the closet, Ryujin follows him out into the living room where he picks up one of his spare speakers from the coffee table and places it in his bag, before Changbin starts pulling his magnetic sticky note pad off of the fridge as well. 

The entire time, Ryujin follows almost aimlessly. She doesn’t know what else to do other than follow Changbin around as he clears her apartment of his belongings. 

Until he stands at her front door with his bag slung onto his shoulder, and that’s when she realises that that’s it. That was all of it. Changbin’s done and once he steps out of the apartment, it’ll be the last time that they will be together. 

“So, you’re finally leaving, huh?” Ryujin manages to joke, laughing slightly at how ironic it had been. She had been telling him the entire time that he wouldn’t need to stick around, yet, when they had finally gotten together, that’s when Changbin realised he simply couldn’t. 

“For once, I don’t think I can wait any longer,” Changbin laughs. 

And a bittersweet feeling overcomes Ryujin’s entire body. 

He takes a step towards Ryujin and pulls her into his arms for one last embrace. Her hands grip the fabric of his shirt before she pulls away and leans in to kiss him. 

For the first time in their relationship, she had decided to kiss him on the lips. 

And while Changbin thinks it’s funny, but cruel, that the first time they’ve properly kissed each other, it would also be the last time. 

“I love you, Ryujin,” he breathes against her before pulling away. 

“I love you, too, Changbin,” she whispers. 

They pull away from each other and Changbin gives her one last smile before he leaves, Ryujin’s hand raising to wave smally as he closes the door behind him. 

Once the door has closed, Ryujin feels her legs give out beneath her and she falls to the ground as the tears finally break free. She chokes out, almost wailing, as she clutches her chest. Her heart feels as though it’s being ripped in two—as though it’s being ripped straight out of her chest and being stomped on right in front of her. 

The world is cruel, Ryujin thinks as she sobs on the floor; completely helpless. But she wonders how she had been so fucking lucky to have been granted the chance to love Changbin, even if it was for a brief moment. She wonders what she had done for the world to have given her the opportunity to feel Changbin’s love, even if it wasn’t meant to last. 

And she cries like she never has before as she realises that she’ll never be able to love him the same way ever again because their parting was almost inevitable. 

They’re just not meant to be. 

On the other side of the door, Changbin slides down the wall. His face contorted with pain as he listens to Ryujin cry from within her apartment, hands covering his face as he tries to stay as quiet as possible. His mouth hangs open in a silent cry, chest heaving rapidly as he tries to compose himself to some extent where he’s able to carry himself back to his own house. 

He wonders why the world has to be as cruel as it is. Why couldn’t they have their stories written together? Why do they have to start a new chapter away from each other? Changbin’s heartbreak feels so fucking physical, pain spreading throughout his entire body as he brings his knees to his chest and hangs his head between them, arms wrapped around his head as he cries on the floor. 

And while Changbin thinks the world is cruel, he still thinks that love is even worse. Because while the world has decided to tear him away from Ryujin, the amount of love that he’s gathered for her should be inhuman. 

And he thinks that while his love for her taught him patience,

He also thinks that it’ll be the same thing that has the power to destroy him.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

xi.

Two years. 

That’s what it took for Changbin to finally feel… okay. He had gone through the rest of his master’s program on autopilot, running on pure redbull, alcohol, smokes, and weed to keep his body moving while his head felt so fucking empty. 

Jisung had been kind enough to provide whatever coping mechanism he could, but even then, he knew that there was only so much that he could help Changbin with. The most he could do was honestly just be there just in case and provide whatever was happening to Raisha and Chan to keep the two updated. 

And even when they had all graduated and started going to live gigs and professionally working on their music, Changbin still was trying so hard to heal himself. He didn’t know how else to handle it other than trying to just process everything. But even then, it was taking him an extremely long time to properly process that Ryujin is someone who was only meant to help guide him for a moment in his lifetime. 

He had gotten significantly closer to Jisung throughout this period because of how much time they spent together since Changbin started to neglect the idea of being alone. He didn’t want to. He simply couldn’t bear the idea of being alone because he knows that it was harder processing his emotions and his memories alone when he could talk to Jisung about it or project everything into his music instead, and Jisung had also gained a secret ability which helped Changbin out greatly once they had graduated; bringing his daughter around more often to keep Changbin preoccupied with the toddler rather than thinking about Ryujin.

And after a year, Changbin had actually been able to finish Sorry, I Love You. Chan hesitated when he had asked the song to be released, but obliged anyway and released it onto Spotify. By far, it had to have been their most popular track on Spotify despite still being a very much underappreciated group, but Raisha had encouraged them that they just needed to be patient if it was something they truly loved.

Which almost sent Changbin spiralling because it felt so painful to have to be patient with his love yet again. But from his experience, he thinks that he can tell himself it’ll be worth it in the end; so Changbin waits patiently as they continue to work on their songs. He’s also patient with himself as he heals day by day with the help of his friends who surround him constantly, taking care of him when he feels he can’t. 

Changbin’s never been more grateful for the three of them than when Chan had come to his apartment at 4 a.m. to bring him food when Changbin couldn’t bring himself to leave his home for almost a week. He couldn’t have been more grateful for when Jisung had ran from his apartment twenty minutes away because he knew that if he had taken a taxi or the train, it would’ve still taken him longer. 

And when Jisung had arrived, his signature bright smile on his face when Changbin had asked why he was over. When in truth, Jisung had thought that Changbin’s message carried a slightly more concerning tone than usual and had decided to come over as fast as possible to provide comfort for him. 

But now, Changbin’s finally feeling better. He feels his shoulders are lighter than usual as he walks through town with the intention to buy himself a new leather jacket for Hyunjin’s engagement party. He had also just gotten his paycheck, so he thought why not splurge on something a bit pricey for once. 

Changbin steps through the glass doors of the store and looks around at the array of clothes as he tries to gather some form of bearing before he’s able to spot what looks like the mens’ jackets. He makes a beeline towards it and browses through the hanging garments, pushing each hanger to the left as he tries to find something that seems to fit his style. 

He hums along to the song playing through the earbud stuck into his left ear as he does, pulling out two leather jackets that seem to look nice. Both of them are nice, but the collars differ only by being rounded and folded over. 

Just as he’s about to put one of the jackets back, something flashy seems to appear in the corner of his eye and it makes Changbin turn to look at it. 

He feels his entire body halt. 

A dragon prints the back of the golden sleeved jacket, the woman with her back turned to him and her straight, dark purple hair cut right at the top of her shoulder blades.

It can’t be. 

Changbin turns his entire body to face the woman as his breath grows shaky. She looks so much like her. 

The woman browses through the rack of clothes while Changbin’s legs carry him before he can even think, approaching her before he could even react to what he was doing. 

“R-Ryujin…?” Changbin calls as he stands behind the woman, but when she turns around, Changbin feels his heart cracking into a million pieces. “O-Oh,” he flinches back and quickly sticks his hands into the pocket of his hoodie, “sorry. Wrong person.”

“It’s okay,” she reassures him with a polite smile before turning her back to him once again. 

Changbin can’t breathe. He thought he was okay. 

He leaves the store empty handed and walks aimlessly through the town until he finds himself standing outside his apartment building. He had moved into the same building as Raisha and Chan a while after he had started earning more money, thinking it would be more convenient to be closer to them after the time Chan drove almost fifteen minutes to get to his apartment when Changbin told he was slipping. 

Chan is nice. He acts like a father to the two of them and with Raisha by his side, it feels like they’re some sort of a wonky family. He really tries to look out for Jisung and Changbin while Raisha makes sure to keep Chan from tipping too far over the edge as well, which creates a nice balance between their group’s typically chaotic dynamic. 

And Changbin knows that Chan can’t be there all the time, so whenever he can’t and he worries a bit extra, he would ask Raisha to keep a close eye on Changbin and Jisung. 

Which includes sending Changbin food whenever she can because sometimes he has a habit of skipping dinner when he gets too caught up with work. 

Or whenever he’s starting to spiral just like he is now. 

Changbin slams his front door shut and mindlessly walks into the living room where he sits on the couch and pulls his phone out to look at his old pictures. He comes across the exact picture that he’s looking for. 

Christmas. 

The day he had given Ryujin the bomber jacket. 

It was taken in the living room of the house that Changbin had moved into in the final year of his degree and lived in throughout his master’s program; one of the first few selfies that they had taken with just the two of them that also seemed to kickstart their relationship. 

Ryujin looked so happy. 

And Changbin covers his mouth with his hand as he stares at the image of her smiling so widely, teeth showing, the whiskers of her cheeks, and the crinkles in her eyes; it’s all too familiar. He starts sobbing into his hand the longer he stares. 

Oh, how he’s missed her. 

Changbin had felt as though his heart was being torn slowly; small pieces being ripped away bit by bit the more time he spent away from Ryujin. He hasn’t spoken to her much ever since they had both graduated because he was trying to heal in a way that didn’t include constantly talking to her. 

But now… now all he wants to do is call her and cry. All he wants to do is tell her how much he misses her and how much he wishes things had been different. He wants to try again. He’s in so much pain that he thinks that he could completely neglect his sexual needs for the sake of Ryujin’s comforting embrace wrapping around his broad frame. 

Changbin, right now, is truly willing to do anything if it means he can return to the familiar feeling of Ryujin’s hands running up and down his back whenever he needed comfort. 

He just wants her back. 

That’s all Changbin wants. 

He’s so lost in the image, hyperventilating, choking, sobbing—wailing—that he doesn’t hear his doorbell ringing before the door unlocks and Raisha steps in. 

“Changbin!” she calls brightly as she steps into his apartment, her movements immediately stopping when she sees the way he looks at her with so much pain on his face, bawling loudly as he stares at her. 

Raisha drops everything in her hands and slams the door shut as she races to Changbin’s side in pure panic. She doesn’t know what’s going on and from her point of view, Changbin had looked as though he was in so much pain that he could’ve easily been dying. 

Because that’s what he feels like is happening. 

Raisha looks at his phone and pulls it aside before wrapping her arms around him. Her words are blurred together as Changbin wails loudly against her, his throat turning raw from how loud he cries, hands gripping onto her bicep for support as she holds him against her. 

While she’s been friends with Changbin for almost five years, Raisha’s a bit lost as to how to handle his emotions. It’s rare that she’s the one who would help with his spirals because Chan would typically be the one to take on the position of Changbin’s emotional support buddy, but with how busy he had been getting lately, none of them had actually discussed how to properly care for Changbin. 

The most she knows is: Don’t pry. Don’t force it out of him. Be there. 

So that’s what Raisha does. 

She rocks Changbin back and forth, whispering soft assurances to him as she keeps her arms securely wrapped around him. 

But the touch only does more wonders to Changbin because it’s also been so long since he’s ever felt anything that he could relate to motherly love. And with the way Raisha hushes him, the way her tone is so gentle as she brushes her hand down his back. She wonders what Chan would do in a situation like this, but she also has a feeling that Jisung is better at handling Changbin’s spirals from the way he talks about it. 

Changbin can feel the rapid beating of his heart calm, his wails slowly turning into cries that further turn into soft sniffles as Raisha keeps him in her hold. 

He thought he had accepted it by now; the fact that the end of the relationship was inevitable. But Changbin feels the pain as though he had broken up with Ryujin all over again—the same pain that he had felt the night he had left her apartment and heard her sobbing. He feels as though he’s stuck in the memory of that night as he plays in his mind as clear as day, repeatedly to the point where he can’t escape the pain that comes with it. 

He thought he had already gotten over it—over Ryujin. 

How wrong he really is. 

Changbin doesn’t know if he’ll ever actually get over her in the way that he’s hoping. He can just hope that he can find a way to cope with his love for her in a way where it turns into something less romantic and more of simply adoring towards her to stop the kind of heart wrenching, chest constricting, feeling that creeps into him whenever he even thinks of her. 

“You’re going to be okay,” Raisha soothes softly, her movement never wavering as she steadily keeps her hands running up and down his back and her body swaying his. 

“I-I don’t know…” he mumbles, voice cracking and throat raw from crying. “I don’t know, Raisha.”

“You will be, Changbin. This will pass. It may take a while, but it will eventually pass as all things do,” she reassures him. “And you know that we’re all here for you. Just say the word and at least one of us will come running to your call.” 

“Thank you,” Changbin whimpers as he presses his face into her shoulder. Raisha smiles softly, knowing that she’ll have to let Chan know about this once she can get Changbin a little more stable just to update her boyfriend. 

“Come on,” she urges as she pulls away slightly. “I dropped the butter chicken to the floor, but I hope the container is still intact. Get some food in your system and get your mind off of this.” 

Changbin takes a moment before he obliges and stands up with Raisha’s help. 

“Thank you for coming,” he whispers as he follows her to the kitchen. 

“Thank you for letting me in.” Raisha turns to him and smiles just before she picks the container off of the floor. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

It takes a few more days of lying lifelessly in his bed before Changbin decides to leave and wander around for some fresh air. He had basically called in sick for as long as he possibly could to give himself time away, and he’s lucky that his supervisor is kind enough to understand that his spirals would get barely any work out of him and allows him some time to take care of his thoughts. 

So he lets his friends know that he’s going out and gets dressed before he leaves the comforting hole that his apartment is and starts wandering around the city in search of anything to clear his mind. 

There’s no actual destination in mind as Changbin walks through the streets, watching as people go about their days; walking past him, bumping into him and mumbling apologies. He walks along shop lots and watches as people live their lives on the inside, laughing, talking—living. 

For once, he decided not to use his headphones as he walks around. He wants to take in the sounds of the city and the life that powers the heart of it, appreciating the sounds of the cars and busses that drive by and the people that laugh and talk as they walk past him. 

Changbin’s filled with a sense of sonder when he stops outside of a café and stares through the large glass window. He doesn’t care whether or not people notice him. He only realises then that everyone around him has places to go; people to meet—people to be. He wonders whether he’ll finally find a place for him to be at. 

He’s realised that, without Ryujin, Changbin feels as though he doesn’t belong anywhere. He feels alienated from the rest of the world. When he was with her, he felt as though whatever energy had shone from her was bringing him into the mix by reflecting off of him in a way that made him feel like… a person. She had taken the effort to look deeper into his life and thoughts to know who he was rather than dwindling him down to something that he was cursed to be associated with. 

And he has a feeling his colleagues fear him because of being his mother’s son. But Changbin doesn’t let the thought of his mother really bother him as much as it used to. Somehow, he had grown to accept that she’s simply a part of his life. The same goes for his past. He had learned to just grow and accept the fact that it was something that he did and that it’s a chapter of his life that he had closed long ago. 

Now, Changbin can actually look back at parts of his life with more ease. 

Which he definitely thanks Ryujin for—because he knows that if she hadn’t accepted him that day, Changbin would’ve probably spent more time trying to cope with his past on his own.  

He lets out a soft sigh before stepping into the café, deciding to order himself a coffee before he continues on his adventure. 

Changbin takes a seat at one of the tables after he’s ordered and goes onto his phone, texting the group chat of his day and what he’s been up to. He’s typically not as active as Jisung or Raisha are, but sometimes, he knows that they appreciate it whenever he tells them what he’s up to; it lets them know how he is. 

He wonders what direction he’ll head on to next. There’s still a lot to the city that Changbin feels he hasn’t explored yet with how much has changed in the past decade or so, which leaves him with quite a few options as he looks at whatever meme Jisung has granted him with today. 

“Excuse me?” 

Changbin looks up and is faced with a woman standing opposite of him, right behind the empty chair as she smiles politely. 

Oh my god, she’s fucking gorgeous. 

“I saw you from the other side of the café and I couldn’t help but notice that your shoes are really nice,” she says. 

Changbin blinks a few times before he looks down at his sneakers. It was a pair of white sneakers that Raisha and Chan had gotten commissioned to cover with various album covers; truly one of a kind from how they had gotten it personalised to Changbin’s taste. 

“O-Oh, thank you,” Changbin says as he looks up and meets her eyes once again. A rush of emotions runs through as he realises that he’s only felt this once before in his entire life and he doesn’t know what would come out of this. “My friends got it commissioned for my birthday a few years back,” he continues when she doesn’t say anything. “So… a really rare pair of shoes.” 

“They’re pretty,” she smiles, her teeth showing this time. “May I?” She gestures to the seat opposite of him and he nods, watching as she sits down. 

Changbin can’t help but think how fucking beautiful this woman is. 

With her now sitting directly across from him, Changbin seizes the opportunity to actually take in all of her features. Her hair is dark brown, lighter streaks of brown and blonde running down the length of her hair and a pair of thin framed glasses sit on the bridge of her rounded nose. Her skin is tan, but in a sense that it’s almost literally golden. 

“I’m Changbin; Seo Changbin, by the way,” he introduces himself and extends his hand across the table. 

“Kaia,” she smiles and takes ahold of his hand. 

“It’s a beautiful name.” 

“Thank you.” Kaia’s face heats up, a dark red glow catching on her tan, full cheeks as she lowers her head sheepishly. “So, what brings you to this café all alone?” 

“I’m… getting over someone,” Changbin states. 

Kaia nods, and for a moment, Changbin thinks that she’s going to be weirded out by the situation. Instead, she smiles and rests her elbows on the table. 

“Tell me about them.”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

xii. 

Once again, Changbin’s fallen in love. Kaia seemed to have been sent by some divine being because she was practically perfect. There was truly nothing about her that seemed to deter Changbin. She was fucking gorgeous, dressed similarly to how he does, and she had practically won the hearts of his friends after one night when she looked Chan in the eye and told him that he acts like an old man. 

They hadn’t actually fallen in love as quickly as Changbin had fallen in love with Ryujin since he was technically still hung up over her, but Kaia was nice enough to stick around and be with him. Which, he was extremely grateful for because he had kept her waiting for quite a few months before realising that he no longer loved Ryujin the same way that he did in university. 

And he realised that, somehow, Kaia had helped him grow out of that love and instead made him direct his love to her instead. It was a slower form of falling in love while she had stayed by his side, making sure that he was staying healthy, eating his meals and staying hydrated. She made sure that he was okay, stayed with him when he spiralled until he just… stopped spiralling whenever he thought of Ryujin. 

Which is when Changbin realised that he had fallen in love with Kaia. Because instead of the adoration and fondness, he realised that she gave him a form of warmth and joy that was stronger than what he had felt towards Ryujin. Kaia brought him light that seemed to glow brighter than he thought was possible.

But with love, comes the process of learning about Kaia’s life. She was raised in a more conservative household and there were a few practices that she held onto despite not being exactly religious. However, Changbin had taken the liberty to learn about more of it for her, knowing that, while it doesn’t really matter to her whether or not he does, it would matter to her family. And he wants to make her feel important, so what better way than to try to be more involved in her culture? 

“Oh! My parents are also flying in next week, by the way. They’ll be staying somewhere nearby my apartment and I told them that… I’d introduce them to you,” Kaia says as she moves away from her vanity.

“Y-You—what?” 

Changbin’s eyes almost bulge out of his skull at what Kaia’s just told him and he honestly doesn’t know how to respond. 

He’s meeting her parents next week?!

“They really want to meet you. I asked them if we could hold it off until we were more… you know… certain. But they insisted,” she explains sheepishly. 

“I-I can meet your parents,” he nods nervously. 

“We’re not allowed to touch each other at all in front of them. So, no holding hands, no hugs, no skinship, and definitely don’t kiss me in front of them.”

Changbin blinks a few times as he processes the information before nodding, gulping anxiously. 

“I-I can do that.”

Kaia purses her lips together before she sits beside him once again and takes both of his hands into hers, resting them on his lap as she smiles reassuringly. 

“My father will be intimidating—that’s his job—but I know he will love you, Changbin.” 

“You’re my girlfriend, you’re supposed to be nice about it,” he jokes. 

“Of course I am,” she smiles teasingly and raises her hand to pinch his cheek. “But you’re my darling boyfriend and I know my father. He will love you.”

“Aish,” Changbin huffs and swats her hand away. “Is there anything I’m not allowed to talk about?” 

“Well, we have the basics: sex, drugs, alcohol—just try to be as conservative as you think you can be.” 

“How am I supposed to dress?” 

“The way you dress is already fine,” Kaia claims. “Changbin, my love, you will do perfectly fine.” 

“O-Okay,” he nods. “I believe you.” 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Changbin feels like his head is going to explode the longer Kaia’s father stares at him from across the table. He knew that actually going through the event of meeting her parents was going to be extremely nerve wracking—especially when he had come out of the shower to see that Kaia was already dressed up in an outfit that was more modest than what she would typically wear. 

While he thought he would be able to handle it, he realises now, as he sits in the restaurant with Kaia and her parents, he realises that it’s going to be a bit more pressuring than he thought. 

“Changbin,” his father starts and leans closer, making Changbin’s back straighten way more than he thought was possible. “I understand that you’ve taken a liking to our daughter and we appreciate that you’ve chosen her to want to be romantically involved with—however, do you understand what you have to do if you wish to marry her?” 

“Dad!” Kaia glares at him. 

“He must already be thinking of marriage if he is so willing to meet with you and your ma, Kaia,” her father says sternly as he looks at her. 

“Stop that,” her mother scolds her father with a laugh. “Don’t worry, Changbin. We understand if you’re not ready for marriage yet—it’s a very daunting topic.” 

“While it is daunting, we need you to fully understand that Kaia has religious and cultural practices that go into marriage,” her father continues. 

“Can we please not talk about marriage now?” Kaia whines and slumps in her chair, face contorted into a cringe as she avoids eye contact with her parents. 

“I-I understand that Kaia has some practices and lifestyles that she needs to follow,” Changbin nods, “and I understand that I need to learn these practices in order to marry her.”

Her father stares at Changbin for a moment before he smiles. 

“I’m willing to learn. If it’s for the sake of being with your daughter, I will learn the right way to do this and I ask that you both help guide me in this as well.” 

Kaia lifts her head slightly and smiles when Changbin turns to look at her, nodding slightly when he silently questions whether he’s doing it right. 

“Kaia, where did you find this boy?” her mother chuckles, almost in disbelief at how Changbin seemed to have impressed the both of them so easily. 

“Just because he says he’s willing to learn doesn’t mean that it’ll happen so easily,” her father scoffs, yet he still smiles as he looks Changbin in the eye. “So, what do you do for a living, Changbin? Kaia has mentioned that you are an artist.”

He feels his chest lightening slightly at the topic of his music and he smiles widely as he starts talking about what he, Jisung, and Chan have accomplished. Every once in a while, Kaia laughs and places her hand on his knee underneath the table to send him reassurance when he gets flustered at something her parents have said, which makes him feel so grateful that she’s there. 

Eventually, the dinner comes to an end and they bid Kaia’s parents goodnight as they stand outside of the restaurant. 

Changbin smiles widely as he looks Kaia’s father in the eye, but his lips part and his eyes widen slightly when he takes a step closer and places his hand on Changbin’s shoulder. 

“You keep her safe, okay? Make sure she doesn’t walk around alone at night and make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid. Kaia seems smart, but sometimes she can get lost in her own head.” 

“Dad, I’m not a child,” Kaia huffs from where she is next to her mother. 

“You must truly be a blessing,” her mother chuckles as she turns to Changbin, “her father has never accepted any of her boyfriends this easily before.” 

“I never said I accept him,” her father laughs, but quickly notices how tense Changbin is slowly becoming. “But I trust that you will treat her well. Let us know if you ever decide to visit her home; we’ll be waiting with open arms.”

“I don’t think we’ll be home anytime soon, but I’ll make sure to bring him over whenever there’s time,” Kaia says as she hugs her mother. 

“Bring him over when you’re engaged,” her mother quickly says. “Snatch him up before someone else comes along.”

“Ma!”

“I don’t think anyone else will be coming,” Changbin laughs upon seeing how Kaia pouts and takes a step closer to her. “I really care about Kaia. I’ll keep her as safe as I can.”

“I’m also trusting that you know how to fight since you… look like that,” her father claims as he gestures to the scars on Changbin’s face and hands. “And while I don’t condone violence, if you need to protect her, you protect her with your life.”

“I will.” 

“May God bless you, Changbin. My wife and I should be getting back to the hotel; we’ve had quite a long day.” He holds onto her hand and smiles as Changbin and Kaia nod. “You two walk safe. Kaia, text your mother when you’ve gotten back to your apartment.”

“Okay, dad,” she chuckles. “Make sure you let me know when you guys are at the hotel! If you need anything, just let me know.”

Her parents nod before they start walking down the street in the direction of their apartment. Kaia turns to Changbin and smiles as she laces her fingers with his once she’s certain her parents won’t be able to see. 

“You did a great job, Binnie.”

“Your dad… likes me, right?” Changbin asks, almost in disbelief at how smooth the entire evening had gone—a wide smile adorning his face as he looks at her. 

“Very much so,” Kaia grins and kisses him on the nose. “Let’s go home.” 

They start walking in the other direction, hands locked together and swinging in between them as they set a leisurely pace. It’s calming and comforting for Changbin knowing that Kaia’s parents like him because now it’ll make their relationship even smoother. 

And, maybe, he thinks that he really does want to marry her. Changbin glances at Kaia as they walk and hearing the way she hums softly to herself makes his smile turn fonder. 

Yeah.

He wants to marry this woman. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

xiii.

A year later, Changbin finds himself at Hyunjin’s wedding reception, laughing away as they watch Jiwon take the bottle of champagne away from Felix. 

“Felix! You’re twenty-six—Hyunjin said you’d calm down your drinking by now!” she scolds and practically holds onto his entire face with her left hand to keep him away. 

“You guys got such nice champagne tonight, though!” he whines, voice muffled by the palm of her hand. 

“I’ll give you an entire unopened bottle if you stay civil for the rest of the reception!” Jiwon argues and pushes him away, Seungmin pulling on Felix’s arm to force him back onto his seat. 

She blows air out and pushes a stray hair back into the braided bun of her hair before smiling. 

“I hope you guys enjoy this wedding. Hyunjin and I spent a lot of money on this and we planned it, so please tell us it’s nice,” she smiles just as Hyunjin walks up behind her and wraps his arm around her. 

“Hello, my darling wife,” he hums as he rests his chin on her shoulder. 

“Yes, yes, we’re married forever now,” she giggles, the fondness showing despite her less affectionate demeanour. 

“Now, be nice to our friends, my love. They came to watch us get married and I even got Felix a special bottle of rosé,” Hyunjin chuckles, winking at Felix when he sees the way his eyes seem to sparkle. 

“This is a really nicely done wedding hall,” Kaia claims as she raises her hand to gesture to the ceiling, the rose gold engagement ring reflecting light off of where it sits snugly on her finger. “I’m loving the ceiling decor.” 

“You can thank Raisha for that. She’s truly the best wedding planner that we could’ve considered,” Jiwon chuckles as she smiles at Raisha, who blushes deeply and leans closer to Chan’s side. “You two should really think about getting her to plan your wedding. She’s wonderful to work with and keeps it amazingly professional.” 

“It also makes it easier because she already knew our tastes,” Hyunjin adds. 

“You guys just give me your budget, a few Pinterest photos, and I’ll try to bring you the wedding of your dreams,” Raisha winks at Changbin and Kaia who laugh and nod. 

On the other side of the table is Ryujin and her own fiance, laughing as they watch the way Felix tries to sneak his hand towards the neck of the bottle that Jiwon is still holding onto. Only for her to hiss and shove him away again, putting the bottle in Seungmin’s lap instead. 

“Keep it away from him. I don’t want him getting hammered before the actual party begins and Hyunjin and I’s parents leave,” she orders. 

“Yes, ma’am,” Seungmin chuckles, sticking his tongue out at Felix while you smile from beside him. 

Changbin had thought it would be awkward meeting Ryujin again after how long it took for him to actually get over her, but instead, he’s filled with a sense of nostalgia when he saw her again for the first time in about four years. 

She looks almost the same as she did back then, only now, the years that she’s aged have started to show a bit more on her face and made her look more mature than she did in university. 

Kaia has been by his side for the entire evening, knowing how nervous he must’ve been knowing that Ryujin would be at the reception after the both of them simply not being able to meet at any other of their friends’ weddings or parties because of their schedules not lining up properly. 

So whenever Changbin was at a wedding or a party, Ryujin wouldn’t, and it seemed to be working vice versa because they just never crossed paths at all until now.

“I need to take a piss,”  Changbin says as he stands up, meaning it to simply let Kaia know than to announce it to all of their friends. 

“Oh, I need to as well,” Aki says as he stands up and presses a loving kiss to Ryujin’s head. “I’ll be right back, baby.” 

He follows Changbin, the both of them walking side-by-side as they try to navigate their way out of their hall and to the restroom. 

“Where the fuck is the restroom in this place?” Aki questions softly, voice more to himself as he looks around the hall while Changbin does the same. 

“They just had to choose a place with a confusing layout, huh?” Changbin laughs. 

They start walking down the hall, following the signs that have the restroom symbol on it, hoping that it’ll just lead them to it eventually. 

“You know, Ryujin talked about you a lot when we first met,” Aki starts. “She… really cares about you, man. You know that jacket that you gave to her when you guys were in uni?” 

Changbin freezes and turns to him, “the black bomber jacket—”

“With the golden sleeves and the dragon,” he finishes for him and nods with a small laugh. “She loves that thing so much it’s almost like she loves it more than me. She even packs it in separate plastic bags whenever we go travelling so that it’s properly protected in her bag.” 

“It’s lasted this long? I would’ve thought it would start falling apart after two years,” he chuckles softly and continues walking. 

Changbin really doesn’t want to make it obvious, but knowing that Ryujin’s taken such good care of the jacket despite them no longer being together just… makes him feel so fucking happy and warm. He knows that he no longer loves her the way that he used to, but with how his love has changed into something more admiring towards her as a friend and as someone who helped him grow; Changbin just can’t help but smile slightly to himself.

“She takes such good care of it. I used to think it was really funny, but then I realised that Ryujin seems to take care of things that mean something to her. And she talks about you so highly that I always wondered who won my fiance’s heart when she was in university.” 

“Well, you have him right here,” Changbin hums. “Man, I used to be so in love with her back then.” 

“She told me about how you guys broke up. She never blamed you.” 

“Yeah, I know. I never blamed her either. We just weren’t meant to be together, you know?” 

“Yeah, which is partially why I kinda wanted to talk to you.” 

Aki stops walking and Changbin turns to look at him questioningly. 

“Thank you. For being there for her when she needed someone. She talks about how easy you made it for her when she was studying because she knew she had someone she could rely on—and I just want to thank you for helping her grow into who she is today because I love her so fucking much, man,” Aki laughs in slight disbelief. “I’m so fucking in love with her that it’s actually fucking insane.” 

“She has a way of doing that to you,” Changbin jokes. “I was like that, too. Back then I used to think she was the most perfect person alive, but I think she was only brought into my life to help me get through some things.” 

He’s honestly trying to hide how genuinely bashful he’s currently feeling. Aki made him feel so appreciated just by thanking him and with Changbin being thanked for helping her grow… he almost feels as though he doesn’t deserve it. 

“You deserve it,” Aki says as though he’s just read his mind. “Ryujin had to go through a lot of shit after you guys broke up, but she never pushed the blame onto you. I don’t know the exact details of your relationship, but I can tell that you really fucking helped her.”

Changbin smiles warmly. He can feel his eyes starting to sting with tears and he takes in a shaky breath as he laughs slightly.

“Thank you for being kind to her, Aki. If there’s anything that I know about Ryujin it’s that she loves unlike anyone I’ve ever met. I’m glad you two are happy together and I hope you two continue to live a happy and healthy life together.”

Aki chuckles and pats him on the back, “thank you. Now, stop crying because Ryujin will kill me if she thinks that I made you cry.” 

Changbin laughs through the tears that start to stream down his cheeks, pure joy overwhelming his entire body as he wipes them away. 

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆　　 ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Kaia moves from her seat to take the now empty one right beside Ryujin, smiling when she gives her a questioning look. 

“I’ve always wanted to meet you,” Kaia claims softly, leaning closer to keep their conversation more private from the rest of the table. “When I first met Changbin, he was still hung up on you, you know?” 

“Shit, really?” Ryujin laughs awkwardly, wondering where this conversation was heading and fearing for the worst.

“Yeah, and I could see that he really did love you so much that when I started liking him, I was worried that he would still be in love with you,” she chuckles, trying her best to keep the air light because she doesn’t mean any harm in bringing it up to Ryujin despite how awkward it could seem. “But the more I got to know him and his past, the more I realised that he loved you so much because you were willing to help him. You gave him the chance to grow when he needed it most and, right now, I’m thanking you for it.”

Ryujin doesn’t say anything as she stares at Kaia, an overwhelming amount of emotions rushing throughout her body as she does. 

“You’re really important to him, Ryujin. Thank you for taking care of him back then because you were there when he needed it and I’ve fallen in love with the version of him that knew you,” she continues and takes Ryujin’s hand in hers. “Thank you so much for helping him to become who he is now.”

“Wow,” she laughs. “I’ve never had an ex’s new partner thank me for them before.” Ryujin looks down and she can feel the familiar sting of tears filling her eyes. “I guess Changbin managed to find himself someone who could take care of him more than I could. I’m sorry we had to wait this long to meet, but I was still in love with him up until I met Aki and I was scared that meeting Changbin so soon would bring back all of those… messy fucking emotions.” 

“He was scared of that, too,” Kaia chuckles.

“I’m glad to see he’s found a way out of that.” Ryujin angles herself so that she’s looking at her properly and rests her other hand right on top of Kaia’s. “I wish you and Changbin a happy life together. If there’s something that I know about Changbin it’s that when he loves someone, he truly does everything in his power to show them that he loves them, and I’m so glad I got to experience that.”

“Oh, he is such a gentleman,” she gushes with a laugh. 

“Does he still cater to Raisha, Chan, and Jisung when everyone meets up? He used to always stay sober so that the others could have a chance at letting loose. He would pretend that he would never do it again, but you’d always find him in the kitchen.” 

“He does! It’s so sweet because I really don’t think Changbin actually likes cooking that much, but if he knows that his friends are coming over, then he’ll be in the kitchen for hours! He can be so doting towards them, but he’ll get so embarrassed whenever they try to point it out.” 

“Yeah,” Ryujin laughs. “Nice to see that he still has some habits from uni.”

“He seems to have held on a lot from when he was in uni. You did a really good job,” Kaia hums. 

Ryujin suddenly can’t seem to hold her emotions at bay for any longer and covers her mouth with her hand, crying with a laugh as she wonders why she’s crying at all. 

“Oh no…” Kaia’s face drops. “No, no! Don’t cry! Oh god—Changbin’s going to kill me if he sees you crying! No! Ryujin, it’s good! You did such a great job with helping him grow and I’m so thankful!”

“I know!” Ryujin cries as she nods, still smiling widely when she moves her hand away. “And I’m just—I’m so overwhelmed. Thank you for telling me this!” She sobs against the palm of her hand, ignoring everyone around the table who asks what’s wrong or looks at Kaia for answers. “I’m sorry. This must be really shocking since this is the first time we’re meeting.” 

“Oh, it’s fine,” Kaia quickly reassures her. “You can’t control your emotions, so it’s nothing to blame yourself for. You’re amazing, Ryujin, and believe that when I say it.” 

The assurance only seems to make Ryujin cry even more as she nods and while Kaia wishes that she could calm Ryujin down before both of their fiances return, she isn’t as lucky as she hoped. 

“Ryujin?” Aki rushes over when he sees that she’s crying. 

“Why are you crying?” Changbin asks, panicking as he looks between both of the women. 

“Kaia is so nice!” Ryujin sniffles as Aki sits beside her and pulls her head to his chest. 

“You’re… crying because Kaia is nice…?” Changbin repeats, only for her to nod against her fiance. He looks up at Kaia who shrugs and laughs. 

“I just thanked her for some things and she started crying because she’s overwhelmed,” she explains while giving him a reassuring look. 

“I doubt you’d do anything to her,” he chuckles and makes his way to Kaia’s side, leaning down to press a kiss to her head just as the lights and the music in the hall seem to shift into a more romantic ambience. 

“Oh! Oh!” you gasp and shoot up, grabbing Seungmin’s wrist, “they’re slow dancing, Min—come on!” He doesn’t get the chance to say anything before he’s dragged away from the table, Raisha and Chan exchanging a look before following the two of you to the dance floor; which leaves Jisung and Felix staring at each other as they try to figure out whether or not they’re supposed to start slow dancing with each other since they’re the only ones without any dates. 

“Where’s Via?” Felix asks when he realises that both Jisung’s son and best friend are nowhere to be seen. 

“She has her own things to attend to, so I left the kid with her since I had a feeling someone would be getting drunk,” Jisung chuckles, earning a bashful giggle from Felix.

Ryujin sniffles as she pulls away from Aki and cups his cheek gently as she breathes out a laugh, leaning forward to kiss him. 

“Is it okay if I take the dance with Changbin?” she asks softly, thumb running over his cheekbone. 

“Of course, baby,” he nods. “I trust you.”

“Thank you, Ki,” she smiles and turns to Changbin who glances at Kaia. 

“Just go,” she urges. “You know I wouldn’t stop you. But I feel like it’s not fair if you two dance together and that it’s only fair if both of your fiances get to dance together, too.” 

“Go ahead,” he chuckles just as she stands up. Changbin leans forward to kiss her cheek gently. 

He turns to Ryujin and extends his hand towards her, helping her to her feet and bringing her to the dance floor where couples dance together as slow music plays through the speakers. 

“What did you guys talk about there?” Changbin asks as he places one hand on her waist and the other holds her hand. 

“She told me about you,” Ryujin hums, one hand on his shoulder. “She told me about what you’re like now and… she told me that you were still in love with me then.” 

“I really was,” he chuckles. “I didn’t know what to do with myself back then, but Kaia basically helped me handle my emotions in a way that was good for me.” 

“That’s good,” she claims. 

“It’s funny actually. Aki was telling me about you when we were heading to the restroom. He said that you talked about me a lot and that you wrap the bomber jacket I gave you in plastic,” Changbin teases and wiggles his eyebrows. 

“No,” she groans and grimaces, a blush spreading across her face. “Why did he tell you that?” 

“Because he said you love the jacket more than you love him, and as your loving fiance, Aki’s job is to embarrass you,” he jokes. 

“Of course it is,” Ryujin scoffs, rolling her eyes but smiling nonetheless. “I’ve missed you, you know. I think I missed your company the most.” 

Changbin sighs and nods. 

“I did, too. I think getting over the fact that we weren’t seeing each other so often was the thing that was the hardest for me to come to terms with,” he mutters. “But I’ve grown and I know now that getting over you was something that I just had to do.” 

“Yeah?” she hums. 

“Yeah.” Changbin smiles. 

It’s nice, he thinks, being able to see and feel Ryujin again. But it isn’t in the way that he used to want. 

No, this feeling is different. 

Changbin thinks it’s nice being able to finally see Ryujin again after all of the years that have passed because he can now, properly, tell himself that he’s truly gotten over their relationship. He can tell himself that he’s healed from the heartache and that he can see and talk to Ryujin in a way that’s not painful for the both of them. 

And it’s honestly the best fucking feeling in the world because, now, Changbin thinks it’s finally time to try and be friends with her again. 

“He’s a lot like you,” Ryujin says after a moment. Changbin hums questioning in response and she turns to look at Aki and Kaia as they dance a few feet away from them, “Aki.” 

“Is he?” 

“I feel like you two would get along quite well. I think the only difference between you two is the fact that he’s not you.” 

“And the fact that he also doesn’t have sexual desire?” 

“Yeah,” Ryujin huffs. “It’s funny to me; Aki reminded me of you a lot when we first met and I was worried that I was falling in love with his habits that mimicked yours, but… I ended up falling in love with him. He’s so sweet and he always tries to pick me up from work so that I don’t have to walk home alone. And he can be so fucking funny,” she laughs. “He knows exactly what to say, when to say it, and he knows exactly when it’s time to order pizza.”

“Hey, I think that’s the best trait to have,” Changbin jokes. 

“How’s Kaia like? I can see that you love her a lot and she seems so lovely.” 

“She’s fucking amazing. Kaia’s actually fucking perfect—I have no idea how I was so lucky to have met her,” he gushes almost instantly. “She dotes on me a lot, but—holy shit—if I accidentally do something stupid, she will not hesitate to smack some sense into me.” 

“That’s good. You do a lot of dumb shit.”

“Significantly less than I did in university,” he corrects, amused. “She reminds me of you in the sense that she encourages me to be better; to grow. I think that’s one thing that I love about her the most really. It’s the fact that I know Kaia’s there whenever I need some support.” 

“She sounds like the perfect hype man,” Ryujin chuckles, leaning her head against Changbin’s chest. 

“She really is.” He raises his hand to rest on the back of her head as he basks in the feeling of being around her again. But Changbin doesn’t want to do anything more than this; nothing more, nothing less. “Thank you for everything, Jin. I think that dating you was something that helped me with being with Kaia. You helped me through a lot and I’m forever grateful for that.” 

Ryujin pulls away and smiles as she looks Changbin in the eyes, her own glossing over once again. 

“You made my university life so precious, Changbin. Thank you so much for being so sweet, so kind, so loving—you helped me be more accepting towards myself,” Ryujin claims softly. “Thank you. I hope that you and Kaia live a healthy and happy life together.”

“And I hope the same for you and Aki.”  

Changbin smiles as he looks at her, his hand ruffling her head gently as he does, to which Ryujin smiles toothily as he does and pushes him away slightly. 

Even though he doesn’t love her the way he did then, he still loves her now, but again, in a different sense than how he loves Kaia. As Changbin holds Ryujin, he’s finally able to convince himself that he’s closed the chapter on their romance and is able to start a new one.

One where they’ll be able to continue living their lives separately, but happily.

#stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids oneshots #stray kids fanfics #itzy #itzy imagines #itzy scenarios #itzy oneshots #itzy fanfics #seo changbin #seo changbin imagines #seo changbin scenarios #seo changbin oneshots #seo changbin fanfics #shin ryujin #shin ryujin imagines #shin ryujin scenarios #shin ryujin oneshots #shin ryujin fanfics #changbin #changbin imagines #changbin scenarios #changbin oneshots #ryujin #ryujin imagines #ryujin scenarios #ryujin oneshots

[jeongin-lvr]

ᵎ　🍶　⊹ pink little skirt, s. changbin

ᝰ✧ 𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀！ 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝗂𝗌 𝗌𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝖺 𝗍𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾，𝗌𝗎𝖻！𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋， 𝗈𝗋𝖺𝗅 ＆ 𝗁𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗃𝗈𝖻， 𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗎𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗌𝖾𝗑 （𝗈𝗇𝗅𝗒 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝖻𝗂𝗍），𝖼𝖺𝗋 𝗌𝖾𝗑／𝗁𝗈𝗈𝖽 𝗌𝖾𝗑，𝗉𝗎𝖻𝗅𝗂𝖼 𝗌𝖾𝗑／𝖴𝖭𝖤𝖣𝖨𝖳𝖤𝖣

[ 3697 words ] ✩ [ do not repost ] ✩ [ 𝗆．𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 ]

𝗜 𝗥𝗔𝗡 my hands down the smooth moire fabric of my pink skirt, admiring in the mirror as the creases shifted flush against my skin. The cloth was thin, cottony and hugged my curves deliciously. I even had to admit, this skirt was among my favorites even though it was so new. So new, in fact, that the shipping package was sitting crinkled and ripped open on the bed behind me.

I reveled in the silky miniskirt for a moment longer before turning to put on the rest of my outfit. And while I slipped on a lace-ridden white top, all my mind wandered to was my boyfriend.

How he always said he likes skirts; especially ones like these. How he liked to watch it ride up my thighs when I did anything- bend over, sit, anything. And even when I had called him a pervert and hit his shoulder playfully, he defended himself with a similar expression.

I flattened my top against my stomach and chest, my eyes falling to the skirt again. Oh, he'd definitely like this one. And I felt my heart flutter as my mindless little fantasies began to tramp across my mind teasingly.

Changbin had no self control, all the other times before- when I wasn't aware of his tendencies -I'd wear a simple skirt, walk around the house like it was nothing. Oh, but it was something to him. Changbin had a thing for those little skirts, his favorite being any miniskirt I had. He'd somehow end up throwing me around the couch edge or maybe on the kitchen countertop, or maybe if we were in public, he'd hide us away somewhere and fuck me in whatever little skirt I chose to wear that day.

Wearing skirts around him was a hazard, a risk. But, god, it was such a thrill. To see him all worked up, eyes glued to my bare thighs and barely covered ass; he was well aware by now that I were teasing him, tempting him with such atrociously short clothes, but he had no complaints.

I decided to touch up my lipgloss in the mirror, gliding the applicator across my lips in a swift motion a few times before I was satisfied. I checked myself out once more, then grinned with approval, grabbing my purse and heading to the living room where my boyfriend was, patiently waiting for me since I had kicked him out of the bedroom we shared.

His head was low on his phone, back facing me, broad shoulders covered by a simple black button down that was mouth-wateringly right around his arms and chest; maybe he was doing a bit of teasing as well.

"Hey, baby," I bent down to his shoulders, nuzzling my head in his neck and wrapping my arms around him, making sure to sensually drag my finger across his chest in the most alluring way.

The male hummed and looked up, unable to see my little skirt from where he sat, but he smiled. His eyes glossed around my face, admiring the light makeup and the way my hair softly framed my skin, "Hey, beautiful. You ready?"

I nodded, stepping away from behind the couch and tiptoeing to the front, revealing my tiny little skirt, the lace of my socks squeezing the fat of my thighs effortlessly; my bag dropping to beside him, but he didn't really notice.

His big brown eyes instantly fell to my thighs, loving the sight as my skirt rolled up more and more with every cautious step.

"Damn," He mumbled, my face feigning innocence as I draped my legs across his body, simply rustling with his delicate strands of hair. My fingers traced intricate lines down the back of his neck, his eyes on mine but I refused to meet them, opting to smile as I played with his hair.

I adjusted my body on his lap, planting my ass right on his growing erection, a soft one. Not too obvious, but I took note of it with a smirk.

Teasing was exhilarating.

Changbin's hands lowered to my ass, squeezing with a shaky breathe. His deep chocolate irises glancing across my entire body smoothly, taking every inch of me in his hands. I tilted my head, doe eyes refusing to break contact with his, lips glossy and lashes fluttering.

"You okay, Binnie?" I asked, hiding my satisfied smile when I felt his cock twitch below me, a slight wince from the boy as I adjusted myself once again. Changbin let his gaze fall to my thighs, making it blatantly obvious to what he was looking at. Licking his lips, he watched the thin fabric of my skirt ride up my thighs, little by little, he caught a glimpse of his favorite panties on me; white lace with a little bow in the front, all presented right in front of him like a sweet present.

The male bit his lip, flickering his eyes back up into mine, "Do you know what you're doing to me?" Genuinely unsure, his hands snaking around my waist tightly, arching my back until it wouldn't budge anymore.

"What do you mean?" I asked with Bambi eyes, pursing my lips. The boy groaned, toying with the seamless edge of my skirt, fingers rolling the fine material. His hands refused to stop fidgeting, suddenly neediness was making everything around him a blur except for the girl presented right in front of him.

"Nevermind," He uttered, patting my hips, "You look very pretty today." He complimented, adorable smile lingering on his lips, sparkle twinkling in his eyes.

I sighed with satisfaction. Oh, how fun today was gonna be. I got up from his lap, ushering him forward too, "Okay, okay. No more sweet talk. Let's go!"

The boy whined, following close behind, begging for his arousal to fade.

Changbin held the shopping cart, watching as I stepped in front of him, eyeing the way my skirt was rise and fall. The way the fabric crinkled across my curves; when I'd bend over and my skirt was would, revealing that delicious pair of panties, the way they hugged my cunt. Changbin had no idea if I was purposefully teasing him this way, yet he had no idea how to look away. It was too much.

"Y/n, let's go," Changbin urged, eyes falling on mine. I turned around, feigning confusion as the way looked at em, helpless. He walked awkwardly, waddling with his lower abdomen pressing against the cart.

"Why?" I asked, purely wanting to test him more, how far could I push it before I got punished. Not that that would be a bad thing either. My hands trailed across the shelf, propping myself up as I looked him dead in the eye.

The male approached me, leaving the cart behind, staring down at me with pleading eyes. Absolutely infatuated, desperate, in need of my assistance. Changbin took my hand from the shelf, warm fingers dragging it across his bulge, hot and ready. I gasped, clicking my tongue teasingly, lips glistening with lipgloss.

"Now let's go," I looked back up at him, watching his pretty lips take in a breathe.

I smiled, wrapping my arms around his shoulder while swaying slightly, "We just need to grab a few more things."

Changbin groaned, following me as I stepped off. A few things wasn't too bad, but every isle, every turn through the store felt dizzying to the poor male. The sickening smell of the tile cleaner throughout the shop was making his head hurt, his erection never leaving him- causing him to stand in the most uncomfortable way. Changbin groaned with discontent around every isle, catching onto the fact that I was just teasing him now.

Finally, we stepped out of the store, his arms full of groceries he insisted on carrying. He hadn't spoke much, too focused on the way his dick throbbed desperately.

Once we got in the car, the atmosphere was thick with sexual imposition, but I just sweetly smiled at the man, my fingers adjusting the hem of my skirt. Silence, he closed his car door, ignoring the engine quickly, barely even checking for passing cars before reversing out of the stall. I watch silently, taking notice of the bulge practically begging for me beneath the thin layer of his jeans.

On the freeway, the car drove quickly, clearly he just wanted to get home so I could take care of what I'd started, but something in my heart fluttered. My mind sparking up an idea that'd surely get me in a bit of trouble.

I leaned across the seats, palming his cock through the rough material of his denim jeans; earning a surprised grunt from the man above me. However, he didn't stop me, which let me press forward. I took my delicate hands and rubbed him harder, his chest beginning to heave up and down with every simple touch of my bare hand.

"What are you doing?" Changbin asked precariously, eyes on the road but his mind beginning to feel fuzzy, drunk off my touch.

I laid my lips on his cock, kissing through the fabric, my pointer and middle finger prodding at the button to come undone. Feeling bold enough to procure his manhood beneath the fabric.

If the air was suffocating before, I was being asphyxiated now. Everything felt dangerous, but I didn't stop. I didn't even falter after unzipping the opening of his jeans, boxers tenting up instantly, I didn't hesitate to reach tenderly into the plaid fabric to grab his cock, hot and wet already.

I readjusted my position, unbuckling my seatbelt only to go back to the task at hand. My hand holding the base of his cock, awe in my eyes. The girth of it, the purple hues and veins lining the sides, the upright position it was in, all due to my little skirt he liked so much.

"Baby," He breathed out, breath fanning my face as I looked up at him, Bambi eyes wide, lashes fluttering innocently.

"Yes?"

"What are you doing?" He was speaking through his teeth, eyes never leaving the road before him.

"Helping you out?" I giggled, flickering my eyes back to his cock, my thumb pressing gently into the slit, collecting the oozing nectar that was addicting to me. The salty flavor reaping havoc on my tongue, making my cunt throb over nothing.

He grunted, finally removing a hand from the steering wheel, still not looking at me, "You... hurry up, then," Changbin adjusted his seat, slightly leaning back but still focusing on the road. Tiny breathless groans leaving his lips as I dragged my thumb over his tip, swift and repeating motions.

"5 minutes till home," He spoke just as I opened my mouth, ready to take him in my lips, "Let's see if you can make me cum, hm?"

"5 minutes?" I spoke in a mumble, confidence slightly faltering. Changbin knew how to hold his climax, he preferred not to, but he's done it tons of times before. Edging me on while simultaneously dragging on the arrival of his own orgasm; never letting me see how fucking hot it was. It made my tummy spin, my cunt helplessly wet, panties turning grey from the dampness of my cunt.

"What's wrong? You were so confident earlier," Changbin's voice low as he spoke, almost in a scolding manner. His dark eyes lingering forward, I could barely see him blink, "Dressing in that slutty outfit. I'm not dumb, baby. You wanted all the attention, hm? Well, go on, let's see how good your mouth really is."

My breathing hitched, mouth salivating. God, he was so hot! I blinked back down, cheeks dusting with blush. I quickly adjusted my hair out of my face and looked down at his cock.

Spitting on it, lubing it up more than it already was, my eyes watching it twitch in my hand, yet not a single moan from the man above.

"Hurry up now," Changbin teased, black button down straining around his biceps, chest rising and falling with every movement I made, "4 minutes."

I hastily took his cock in my mouth, wasting no more time than I already had. The bits I couldn't fit were preoccupied with my hand, jerking him off with quick flicks to match the hasty movement of my mouth.

The car was silent apart from the wet noises from my mouth, slurping sounds and squelches that's sounded pornographic. Time seemed both too fast and too slow all at once. Every now and again a shaky breathe was let out by Changbin's pretty lips, but never more than that. Frustrating to a new level, my thighs squeezing tight from how erotic it all felt.

Sucking my boyfriend off mid drive, minutes away from home because I was too desperate for a taste. Disguising my slutty behavior with the guise of "helping him out" when in reality it was all to fuel my own sick fantasies.

And he played right along, already knowing as soon as we were home he'd have his way with me.

I thought of all the ways he would make me take him, on the kitchen island, legs wide while he fucked me raw; maybe as soon as we'd get in the house he'd push me against the door and fuck me there, not caring if anyone came by or knocked. My mind wandered, lips and wrist doing all the work while he drove smoothly.

"Hmm, that all you got?" Changbin chuckled, making that familiar turn into the driveway of our house. Missed opportunity, we were home and I hadn't garnered a single bit of cum from the man. Oh, he was good.

"You'd think someone so fucking hot would know how to use her mouth," He shrugged, shoving my shoulders back until I was off his unclothed cock, sprung free and glistening in sweat, red from my lips. My cheeks sore, jaw hinges burning and throat beginning to scathe with a burning sensation.

"Bin..." I pouted, wiping the bit of dribble from my lips off my chin, nervously pulling at the front of my skirt. I plopped back into my chair, whiny and red with blush.

He didn't respond, instead looking out the window, putting the car in park effortlessly before opening his door. In one smooth motion he slipped his cock away, getting out of his seat all at once. For a second I was confused, eyes watching as he wandered through the dusk, the night air around us darkening the surrounding lots beside our home.

Changbin finally finished whatever he was doing, then quickly came to my car side, opening the door and grabbing my wrist.

"What-?"

"On the hood," Changbin demanded, "Now, pretty girl. Gonna show you how to properly fuck." He was playing around, his eyes lidded and dusted with a glossy haze of lust. The air was cool, making me shiver, the engine still hot from running earlier. He was dead serious.

I felt my cunt throb, the exhilaration of being outside, though dark, just openly for anyone to see? For some reason my head was spinning and my cunt was the neediest it's been all day.

I got on the car, my bare ass meeting the warmth of the hood of the car, skirt lifting already without any altering needed, my panties freely visible to anyone looking.

Though it was dark, it wasn't 100% pitch black. Instead, just the right amount of purple-red that made the sky look like a painting; moonlight rising higher and higher, stars blinking and swirling like an oily work of art. Nothing but the sound of wind whistling and trees rustling to fill the air, our breathed barely audible in the sleepless void of the night.

His fingers met my bare thigh, pulling my thighs wide open, even wider than they already were, hands gliding up and down my plush skin.

"Bin, what if someone sees?"

He ignored my question, "God this skirts been driving me wild all day. Everyone was staring at you, you're such a fucking whore. My whore. Yeah?" Clandestine words for secretive touches, fingers gliding smoothly over my drenched panties, the thin lace not holding anything in. One touch had me shivering, moaning with a wide O shaped mouth.

"Speak."

"Y-yes, Binnie," I moaned, his thick fingers tugging the delicate fabric to the side, not even bothering to take them off or lift my skirt. That was part of the appeal, the presence of that skirt was what was making this whole ordeal even happen. Mixed with the cold air directly blowing on my cunt, I couldn't stand the torturous foreplay.

He went to rub my clit, fingers already soaked in my leaky liquid, but my hand caught his wrist, "Just put it in. Please, just need your big cock to fill me up..."

"Aw, my little slut wants me so soon?" Changbin tilted his head, ghosting my lips and breathing sensually down my face. Quickly, he collided his lips with mine, breathless groans deepening the moment, deepening the restless kiss. Lips mending together, kneading our pink mouths like dough. Skin hot, libido running high.

"Please?" I whimpered in the kiss, his thumb slowly rubbing me in figure eights.

"Can't say no," Changbin moaned, grabbing his cock out of his right pants; guiding his dick to my cunt, watching with an intense stare.

He slipped the tip in, the thickness of him stretching me out making my mind spin; lowly little whimpers filling the abnormally quiet night air, the moon being the only witness to our secret rendezvous. My hands grabbed his shoulders, nails digging into his already red tinted skin. Slowly, little inch by little inch, he pushed himself inside of me, single wet slap of our bodies colliding being the only proof of the connection.

I glanced down, high on risk. High on the way I felt so indescribably full. His cock generously prodding at my sweet spot, every little movement making me shiver and shake.

"Yeah, you took it so well. Good little slut," He groaned, grabbing my hips, one hand on my jaw as he slipped one fingers onto my tongue. Pressing into it while rocking back, nearly emptying me only to fill me up again. And then again, and again. And effortless motion that had me unwinding bit by bit, moans slurred by the way his fingers filled my jaw.

The only conducive outcome being that I needed to cum, I needed the sweet ecstasy of his cum to fill me up while we were out in the open, daringly on the verge of being caught in every way. His pretty cock pumping into me while I couldn't hold back or resist my own mewls of validation. Gripping onto his black top for dear life as he used me to his liking.

"You're so... fucking tight," He moaned, probably louder than intended but he didn't seem to care, "So warm. God, you take it so good."

I clasped onto his bicep, my hands too small to wrap around his well built arms; so I clamped my nails down, maybe a little too hard as I heard him since and hiss from the contact, never faltering his thrusts into me. Over and over he'd hit the little gummy bit deep within me, the angle of the car making it perfectly available to reach.

"Bin- right there, oh fuck!" I yelped against his fingers, drool salivating down my chin, leaking to my neck. My head falling back and forth with every detrimental thrust he pushed into me.

"Such a good slut," Changbin groaned, jamming his fingers farther down my throat, pushing far enough until I gagged, causing burning tears to fill me eyes, one after the other began to slip down my throat; gags and slapping filling the air, lewd sounds from just us.

Maybe I would've cared more about getting caught if I was being stuffed full of thick, perfect cock. Being used like a cum-holder was all I needed, all I wanted from him.

Changbin pried my jaw wide, fingers no longer gagging me, instead just opening my mouth wider, kissing along my lips easier to place that way. His warm tongue gliding across my teeth, my lower lip, my own tongue struggling to keep up with his dominant pace.

And one after the other, his consummate stealth and agility allowed him to master the pattern and hit speed in order to make my eyes roll back, my cunt clamping around him as my orgasm began to flood my body.

"Cumming! Bin, fuck sensitive!!" I whined into the open air, head falling back, eyes landing on the watchful moon. My jaw hanging wide as breathy pants filled the cold air. But even though the air was cold, I felt so warm. So sweaty and fulfilled.

The man continued to fuck my overstimulated hole, groaning before his own climax overtook his body, muscles stiffening as he emptied his load into my fluttering cunt.

He didn't pull out, opting to let his cum simmer inside of me with having it leak.

Changbin wrapped his strong arm around my waist, then his other hand slipped from my lips, dragging a string of saliva with it. His damp hand now cupping my cheek as he cooed sweet nothings into my ear, breath faltering to match his shaky, post climax voice.

"You should wear this skirt more often," My boyfriend snickered into my ear, holding me up as a sudden wave of sleepiness overtook my shaky body.

I whined, finally feeling his dick slip out of me, hasty movements to stuff it away, fix my panties before anyone saw. Though, it wouldn't have mattered if anyone did.

"I will if you fuck me like that every time," I played along with his playful offer, arms lifting me from the hood, steamy with the hazy glow of our shared sweat from the heat of our bodies.

"Sounds like a deal," Changbin wrapped my thighs around his body, taking me by the back of my plush thighs and making his way into the house.

#what is happening #oneshot #stray kids #writing #skz scenarios #skz #skz fanfic #skz imagines #skz oneshots #skz smut #skz x reader #skz changbin #seo changbin #changbin x reader #changbin x y/n #stray kids smut #changbin #changbin smut #changbin x female reader #skz fluff

[slutforleeminho]

Hey, love!!

I saw the requests open for Changbin. Can you do a shower smut with a shy reader and make it extra sensual and passionate. Like some body worshipping?

Ignore if you're uncomfortable.

Toodles!! Have a good day!!

stop it rn this is such a cute idea

‘join me?’ ~ seo changbin

“binnie.” you whispered into the shell of his ear while also gently shaking his arm, trying your best to wake him up in a quiet way. but changbin slept like a rock, the man has slept through every single storm that you would jolt awake in fear to. you were growing impatient. “changbin!” you raised you voice, ditching the soft girl voice you were using merely a moment before. he groaned against his pillow, a muffled ‘five more minutes’ was the only thing he said before hiding his face under the blanket. you rolled your eyes at his laziness but excused his actions because he was so cute doing it. “i made breakfast.” his reaction was exactly how you predicted it to be, head peaking out from under the duvet as he yawned a ‘what did you make’.

it wasn’t long before you were both sitting at the kitchen island, changbin chowing down while you watched him with a smile on your face. you loved to cook for him, it was always the first thing you did in the morning. you lost count of how many cook books you’ve bought so you could practice new recipes for him to taste test. you learned over the past few years the food was basically his love language, that and physical touch. he would always come up behind you and wrap his thick arms around your waist while you were making dinner, leaving soft kisses on your neck and whispering sweet love confessions in your ear. you would never pass up the opportunity to cook for him.

once he was finished he placed his used dishes in the sink and announced he was off to take a shower, but not before thanking you for the food with a kiss. “don’t take too long. i have to take one too.” you had done a quick workout before he woke up and wanted to wash the dried sweat off of you.

“why don’t you just join me? the shower is big enough for the both of us.” his offer took you by surprise, you had never done that before. you were barely confident enough to have sex with him in a dark room, let alone be completely bare naked before him while you bathed. it was that you were insecure about the way you looked, you knew you were pretty, you just didn’t think you were pretty enough for him. compared to him you looked pitiful. i mean have you seen him? he looked like he was hand sculpted by god himself.

“no!” you responded quickly, shutting down his idea. but the confusion on his face made you realize you could’ve worded that a little nicer. “i mean that’s okay. i need to wash up these dishes anyways.” you said in a calmer tone this time. but he still wasn’t buying it.

“the dishes can wait. come on baby please.” his voice was whiny as he begged you to accompany him, his lip jutted out in a pout and eyes got ten times bigger, they sparkled as if a tear would fall out any second. you couldn’t resist the cuteness of it all and caved in rather quickly. his demeanor changed automatically from the sad puppy to jumping in excitement and grabbing your hand to drag you to the bathroom. you giggled at reaction, he was so happy you were joining him.

once you were in you stood behind him, letting him wet his hair and body. you couldn’t help you eyes from wandering, admiring all of him, from his hands and down his arms, drooling at the sight sight of his biceps and the way the flexed as he ran his fingers through his hair. his back muscles were so defined and detailed, every dip and curve of them were drawing you in. “just couldn’t help yourself could you?” you were confused by his question but then reality hit you like a bag of bricks and you realized you were tracing out patterns on his back, mapping out all your favorite parts. you quickly retracted your hands and held them to your chest. embarrassment started to set in as you apologized to him and how you didn’t know what came over you.

he turned around, his eyes meeting yours immediately. he took your hands in his, rubbing circles onto your palm with his thumbs. “why are you sorry? i love it when you touch me. the only downside to it is that your hands are so tiny that it kinda tickles.” the way he was speaking to you so casually put you at ease, making you feel so much more comfortable.

“i just didn’t want to invade your personal bubble.” his head cocked to the side as he looked down at you.

“i’ve never had a personal bubble when it comes to you, baby.” he brought both of your hands up to his chest, placing them atop. “feel free to touch me however you’d like.” after given his explicit consent you ran your hands all over his chest, making your way down to his torso. he didn’t really have defined abs but you couldn’t give less of a fuck, he was still the sexiest person you’d ever laid eyes on.

as you felt him up the heat growing in between your legs started to become uncomfortable, squeezing your thighs together to relieve yourself a little bit. your constant shifting must have caught chanbins eye. “can i invade your personal bubble?” a hint of teasing in his voice.

“please.” you didn’t mean to sound so needy but that’s exactly what you are, needy. he wrapped is arms around your waist and brought you flush against his chest, your boobs squished against him. he smashed his lips against yours, the kiss was gentle but still heated. you gasped when his tongue swiped against yours and you brought your hands to the back of his head to tangle your fingers into his hair and pull him even closer. he moved his kisses from your lips to your neck, creating little red marks as he went. he kept going lower until he reached your perky breasts, taking your left nipple into his mouth and sucking like his life depended on it. his tongue tongue circled it, working you up until you were arching your back up and closer to his mouth. he suddenly pulled away, the quiet sound of a ‘pop’ was heard from the separation of his lips from your now swollen and aching nipple. he only gave you a small glance before dropping to his knees to be eye level with your cunt. his eyes sparkled as he looked at your soaked pussy, your wetness dripping down your thighs. he pushed your thighs farther apart and without warning dove straight into licking from your entrance to your clit, stopping there for a moment to circle it with his tongue then sucking hard and then repeating his actions. you threw your head back in pure ecstasy, his mouth working you over so good. your legs started to shake from the uncomfortable stance. he noticed and lifted you right thigh over his shoulder, taking some of the weight off of your feet. your hand found it’s way to his hair once again but this time you pulled at it harshly before shoving his face closer to your sex. your hip started moving on their own, basically full on riding his face at this point. the pressure started to build up and you knew if he kept eating you out like he was a starved man, you would absolutely explode. a rather loud moan came from deep in your gut when he started started steadily sucking on you clit, and just like that you were coming undone on his face.

he continued softly licking up your release until you fully came down from your high. your chest heaved as you tried you best to catch your breath but it was difficult when that was probably the most intense orgasm you’d ever experienced.

he carefully removed your leg off of his shoulder and placed it back on the floor, standing back up to hover over your quivering body. “you look so pretty when when you come.” he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. his compliment went straight to your core and you suddenly felt shy under his piercing gaze, a deep blush painting your cheeks. “aww is my baby flustered?” he smirked as he ran his finger over the pink of your cheek. “how about we see how you look when you come on my cock, yeah?” you nodded eagerly which pulled a laugh out of changbin. but his honey like voice died down and he quickly got to work, pulling you in and kissing you passionately. you could taste yourself on his tongue but the maple syrup from his breakfast overcame it, making him taste so sweet.

his hands went from the small of your back to cup your ass cheeks, he squeezed harshly and used the hold he had on you to lift you off your feet and into his arms. your legs wrapped around his waist, squeezing them tightly around him to keep yourself up. you felt the tip of changbins cock pressing up against your ass, he was so hard.

he pressed your back against the cold tile wall causing you to gasp. he rutted his hips forward, the tip of his member nudging your clit. even though you just came less than ten minutes ago, the need that was bubbling in your lower belly was hard to ignore. “bin please.” only changbin could pull this side of you out of hiding.

“what is it, honey? tell me what you want.” he always urged you to be vocal and communicate your wants during your intimate times together.

“i want you inside me.” he grinned at your answer.

“so greedy. i already made you come once and you want more?” to anyone else it would sound like he was teasing you but you knew he was only joking and would give you anything you asked for on a silver platter. that’s what he always does, serves you. wether it be simple things like picking something up for you from the store on his way home from work, to getting on him hands and knees to please you until you tell him to stop. changbin talks big game but you know deep down that you have this man wrapped around your little finger.

when he finally does enter you for the first time, it’s euphoric. little bolts of electricity shooting through your body, starting at your core and exiting from your toes and finger tips, leaving you feeling tingly. your fingers dug into his broad shoulders, leaving little crescent moon shapes on his skin. he stretched you out as far as you could go, pushing your limits. he bottomed out and released a puff of breath he must’ve been holding in. he let he adjust to his girth before pulling out, just to push his way back into your plush walls. “you’re always so wet for me, baby. always so warm and tight. feels so good sweetheart.” his praise caused a quiet whine to escape your red and swollen lips, bruised from all the harsh biting in attempt to hold yourself back from screaming.

instead of fucking you senseless, he thrusted into you slowly and steadily, hitting that one good spot deep inside you. the slower he went the more you wanted to force him onto this shower floor and ride him till you both came, but you let him have his way with you. you knew he loved to take it slow and just relish in the feeling of you, taking in every detail and just feel. but he too had needs that needed to be fulfilled and you were more than willing to help him get there.

his hips sped up as he chased after that incredible high that he could only find in you. he started getting louder with his moans and grunts, signaling he was getting closer to his end. his desperation and made you clench around him, you felt him twitching uncontrollably and his hips started losing their rhythm. “i’m gonna come. are you close, sweetheart?”

“so close.” your breathing was all over the place, occasionally catching in your throat.

“shit i’m coming, baby.” his hips stuttered as he emptied himself inside of you, moaning your name into the crook of your neck. the warmth of his seed filling you up pushed you over the edge for the second and final time today. your back arched up into him and your legs tried to squeeze together but his large hands pulled your legs open, keeping them spread so he could reach the peak of his orgasm and make sure you did too.

he stopped altogether when you whimpered from being so sensitive and tired from the two very intense orgasms in the span of fifteen minutes. he lowered your legs back to the floor but didn’t let go of your waist, still holding the majority of your weight up. “even better” he grinned.

“what do you mean?” your eyebrows drawn together in confusion.

“you look even prettier when you come on my cock.” his tongue drew out to wet his lips. you couldn’t help but smile at his compliment and bring your hands up to cover your red ears. he took your hands in his and pulled you under the stream of warm water, wetting your hair and grabbing your lavender shampoo from the little shelf in the corner, and pouring a dime size amount in his palm. “how about we actually shower now?” he joked as he rubbed his hands together, creating a foam. you agreed and turned around, allowing him to run his fingers through your hair and message it into your scalp, humming at the relaxing feeling.

i like this one🤭

@fawnpeaks @yumiblogs

#kpop #kpop oneshots #kpop senarios #stray kids #skz #skz imagines #skz scenarios #kpop smut #skz smut #stray kids smut #seo changbin #changbin #changbin stray kids #changbin smut #changbin skz #changbin scenarios #changbin x oc #changbin x reader #changbin x you #changbin x y/n #changbin x female reader #changbin fluff #changbin fic #changbin fanfic #skz x you #skz fluff #skz x reader #skz changbin #skz stay #skz ff

[httpdwaekki]

surprise | s.c.

summary: changbin shows you his new piercing.

w.c: 511

warnings: very short n sweet, not really sure what this is but it’s here LMAO.

a/n: now listen. i know the piercing is fake BUT LET ME HAVE MY MOMENT OKAY. also besties i will get to your requests i promise i just got really bad writer’s block so i wrote this to kinda get me out of it. but they are coming !! anyway, i hope you enjoy! remember to eat, drink water and take your meds, ily <3

my library

(pictures are not mine! credit to owners!)

he stopped at the doorway, leaning against the wooden frame, admiring the scene in front of him. you were propped up, against your plethora of plushies and pillows, legs stretched out in front of you. your eyebrows creased in focus, glasses slowing slipping down your nose.

he moved from the door frame, “hi jagi.” you quickly glance up, not wanting to lose your place as the plot intensifies. “hi bub,” you start, pushing your glasses back up to their rightful place. “give me one sec to finish this chapter.” he moves next to you, grabbing your legs, placing them on his as he sits down.

“how was-” you cut yourself off as he turns his head, a small refective light catching your eye. “woah!” you quickly slip your bookmark in your book before tossing it to the side. you quickly sit up, your legs sliding against his until your plush ones are atop his muscular ones.

you grab his face, squishing his soft cheeks in the process, turning his face to the side. you examine the two silver balls resting against his soft cheek, under his left eye. eyes wide in wonder as they dart around his face.

“you didn’t tell me you were getting a piercing.” you whisper, taking your free hand, gently touching the area under the reddened skin. “do you like it?” the question sounded slightly muffled since you were still squishing his soft cheeks.

you turn his head directly to you in surprise. “i love it jagi, it looks so good.” his cheeks redden under your touch. small smile etching into his soft features.

you gently turn his head once more, placing a soft kiss under the piercing. you finally let go, grabbing his arm that now laid in his lap. “did it hurt?” you ask, eyes still stuck on the reflective jewelry.

“not really,” he whispers, his hands fine your soft thighs, “do you like it bunny?” he asks gently. your gaze immediately snaps to his boba eyes.

“so much, it looks so good bub.” you smile, hand coming up to rest on the opposite cheek, thumb brushing his plump cheek.

“are you sure? it’s new, not something i’ve done before, it’s not too,” he pauses to find the words. “random i guess? or weird on me?” you immediately shake your head.

“not at all bin, it looks really good.” you smile, reassuring him. his ears start getting red from the compliments. “thank you, bunny.” he whispered, giving your thigh a squeeze.

you smile, pulling him into a passionate kiss. he moves his hands to your hips, pulling you into his lap fully before placing his hands back on your thighs.

you pull away slightly. “i love you.” he whispers against your lips. your smile widens, “i love you more pretty boy.” pulling him into another kiss.

do not repost

#seo changbin #changbin #changbin drabble #changbin x you #changbin oneshot #changbin fic #changbin x reader #changbin fluff #changbin imagine #stray kids #stray kids imagine #stray kids x reader #stray kids x you #stray kids drabble #stray kids oneshot #stray kids fic #stray kids fluff #ash's archive ⟡˖° #binnie <3

[soobnny]

drunk in love — seo changbin.

trope. best friends to lovers. college au. mutual pining.

synopsis. getting drunk for the first time with the one person you trust the most doesn’t sound like a bad idea, right? even if you’re madly in love with them?

word count. 2.2k words

warnings. drinking, puking, and just everything that comes with being drunk, curse words

note. been in a changbin mood recently

Everything looks so hazy.

With a shot glass clumsily in hand, you tilt your hand to look around Changbin’s living room in wonder. Everything looks as it has always been, the same pieces of furniture in the same places, and yet it felt totally different.

The walls look a different color, and the television seems to have grown a new pair. How silly to keep two TVs side by side each other.

You giggle at the thought, eyes unfocused as you keep staring at his television with curiosity. Your best friend, currently seated beside you on the couch, carefully grabs the shot glass from your hand to prevent any accidents – taking advantage of the moment where you’re distracted.

A few minutes ago, when he had attempted the same thing, you had gotten upset. Changbin would rather roll down multiple flights of stairs than have you be upset with him again, even if it was unintentional and under the influence of alcohol.

He doesn’t even know what had prompted you to drink in the first place. You had just texted him, completely out of the blue; can we drink tonight lol

And before he could even respond, you were already knocking on his door with a bottle of tequila in hand and a sheepish smile painted on your features. He accepts the offer. For one, he could never say no to you. And secondly, he had no classes tomorrow and he hadn’t drank in a while.

He could use the taste of alcohol to hide behind when it comes to his feelings for you. It’s grown tenfold over the past few weeks, and although he could never trust himself drunk around you (he knows his blabber mouth would confess in one way or another), a few shots wouldn’t hurt.

Plus, he has never drank with you either. To his information, you’ve never drank before either. At all.

Changbin had asked if you wanted to invite any of your friends over, even the guys, but you had asked if it was alright that it was just the two of you for tonight.

It’s because you trust him the most, but you don’t need to tell him that.

If you did, he would’ve exploded. But you didn’t have to know that either.

With the shot glass successfully out of your reach, Changbin doesn’t even try to understand what you’re giggling about. He knows you’re hit, and the wholesome way you’re smiling is too adorable to question. He just lets you stare at his television like it was a Nobel prize winning discovery.

After gawking for a few minutes, you turn your attention to Changbin, scooting so much closer that your knees are pressed together now. Leaning in with a hand covering your mouth, you whisper into his ear.

“Why do you have two TVs?”

Changbin feels like crying at how cute you are.

“I think you might’ve had too much to drink.” You pull away from his face, eyebrows knit as you shake your head in disagreement. You’re too shy to admit you’ve already been hit hours ago.

“I’m dizzy, but I can still understand what’s happening around me. So, I’m just tipsy, right?” You don’t even give him a chance to respond when you start talking about something entirely different, abruptly getting up from your seat to point at the walls.

Changbin follows suit with his hands stretched out in case you fall over.

“When did you get the time to repaint your walls? I liked the old one better.” Eyes blinking rapidly, you step forward a little unsteadily and Changbin has an arm hovering around you in record time. “It changed again just now!”

“Think you’re really drunk, darling.”

“‘M not drunk. Your wall’s being weird.” You brush his statement dismissively, attempting to stumble towards the painted walls to see them up close.

Though, you don’t think your feet want to cooperate with you very much.

Changbin has to pull you to his side before you can trip over your own feet, and you can feel the heat spreading from your neck to your face but you’re unsure if it’s from the alcohol or the close proximity to your best friend.

“Okay. You’re not drunk. I believe you.” His grip tightens around you, and you smile victoriously at the small accomplishment of convincing him you aren’t drunk, even though he knows otherwise.

“Thank you.” You politely respond, bowing unsteadily before looking up at him with your crescent eyes and your crooked grin, and the boy really has to try his best not to get carried away with the overwhelming amount of feelings he has for you.

Especially when you’re looking at him like that.

He fails, of course, hearing his own heartbeat quicken and his palms start to sweat, but at least he tried anyway. In trial of calming himself down, he places his palm on the entirety of your face and pushes you back down to sit on the couch.

Changbin hears nothing but muffled protests from you, but he takes the limited time he has with your eyes peeled to clear his throat and recompose himself before he pulls his hand back.

Get it together, Changbin.

Though, even after having calmed himself, he still finds himself thinking about the way you perfectly fit by his side, like he has always been meant to wrap an arm around your waist.

He wants you so fucking bad, and it really doesn’t help that your cuteness has heightened from the silly lens you’re viewing the world in right now.

Preparing himself for your scolding, he finds that you’ve completely forgotten the way he had manhandled you back on the couch. Instead, you’re gripping at your shirt with your eyebrows twisted, lips pressed in a thin line as if you’re trying to discern the way you’re feeling right now.

“Binnie, I’m a little dizzy now.”

And then you’re getting up again.

“Careful.” He mumbles under his breath, stepping forward. You always trust Changbin to be there before you fall.

Though, ironically, you’ve been falling for a few years now. But you haven’t crashed yet and there’s still time for Changbin to open his arms and catch you if he wanted to.

You can tell he’s tired. You don’t even know what time it is anymore. Everything’s so distorted and it’s all just static to you now. All you know is that you have to get home so Changbin can get his much needed rest.

“Gotta get home now.” You hiccup, body swaying in an alarming way as you try to make a run for his front door.

“Not so fast.” He pulls you back, allowing you to rest most of your weight on him when you stumble back. “You’re sleeping here tonight. Can’t let you go home like this. Hmm? Who’s gonna take care of you?”

“You gonna take care of me?” Your voice has grown incredibly soft now, hands gripping his arms to keep yourself standing.

“Mhm.” He leans forward to brush away the hair falling in front of your face, tucking the loose strands behind your ear so it doesn’t bother you so much.

“Thank you, Binnie. You always take care of me.”

Changbin thinks he’s gonna pass out again because here you are, looking at him again. In some delusional way, it makes him think you feel the same as him, even though he thinks it’s just wishful thinking.

“Stop looking at me like that. Makes it really hard for me.”

“Makes it hard to what?” You’re standing on your tiptoes to try and mirror his height so your face is directly in front of his now, and Changbin has to hold both of your arms to prevent you from falling on top of him completely.

“Not to kiss you.” He mumbles begrudgingly. It’s okay, you won’t remember this tomorrow. He thinks. Or, he hopes.

But if you do, he’s equally hoping you admit you’ve always wanted to kiss him too.

“What’s stopping you?” Another hiccup.

“You’re drunk.” Changbin deadpans, pinching your cheeks, and immediately regretting his decision when a pout sports your lips and your eyebrows knit together in the most adorable way possible.

“I told you ‘m not drunk!” You let your head fall on his shoulder.

Only a few seconds of silence pass before you’re speaking again. Although, your tone’s a little more troubled. “Uh oh. I don’t feel too good.”

You don’t really remember how you got to the bathroom. The only thing you can feel is a hand rubbing your back and another pulling your hair back as you’re hunched over his toilet seat, vomiting out whatever you had for dinner earlier.

Tears prick in your eyes, and then you’re hurling again, coughing out as if it’ll help you feel any better about the circumstance you’re under. You don’t even notice Changbin has left your side until he comes back with a glass of water, making sure you drink all of it after wiping away the corners of your mouth.

“Sorry.” You frown, lips starting to tremble as you stare down at the floor, clearly dejected and ashamed.

Changbin sits down on his bathroom floor next to you, continuing to rub your back like he did earlier. “It’s okay. This kind of thing happens.”

“But it’s gross, and now you’ll never like me. You’ll like someone else who doesn’t vomit in your toilet.” He lets out a breathy laugh at how sad you sound, and you’re starting to feel embarrassed.

“Hey. I like you even when you vomit in my toilet.”

You look up at him with doe eyes, and you suddenly feel so much better. “Promise?”

“I promise.”

“Mkay. Thank you.” You smile stupid to yourself, playing with your fingers and suddenly feeling shy.

Changbin finds the sight endearing, and feels his heart expand in fondness every time you say ‘thank you’ at even the most minuscule thing – when he “believed” you were drunk, when he had let you stay the night, when he told you he still liked you even when you puke.

He snaps out of his thoughts when he catches you yawning.

“You tired? Gonna get you some clothes to change into, okay?”

“What’s wrong with my clothes?”

“Not gonna let you sleep in that. You’ll be uncomfortable.” He pats your head once he’s stood up from having sat on the bathroom floor next to you.

“Oh. You’re right.”

You don’t protest further, humming to yourself as you wait for him to come back.

He returns with some of his spare clothes and a damp face towel. After wiping your face, he allows you to change into your clothes after having convinced him you could do it. He can’t help but laugh when you walk out of his bathroom with his shirt on backwards.

You immediately fall face first on his bed, groaning out at how comfortable his bed was. Changbin smiles fondly at the sight, helping you tuck yourself in comfortably. You blink up at him, patting the space next to you.

“Come to bed now.”

“Gotta change too, okay? Give me a few minutes.”

You whine childishly when he makes his way to his bathroom. “Binnie, where are you?”

“Just a few more minutes.”

“But Binnie! I’m cold. And.. and… what if someone suddenly came in and took me away! It’ll be all your fault.” You try to play with the cards that you’re dealt with, scheming to say anything that could guilt trip Changbin into speeding up in the bathroom so he could be beside you right now.

“Okay, okay. I’m here, I’m done.”

You’re grumpy now, even with his favorite blanket wrapped around you. When he sits down beside you on his bed, you’re scooting away slightly to really sell the part.

“You mad at me?” He whispers, smiling to himself when you nod your head.

“You left me all alone.”

“Just so I’m wearing clean clothes when I cuddle you.”

“You’re gonna cuddle me?” You ask with wide eyes.

“You said you were cold, hm?”

It doesn’t take much after that before you’re wrapped in his arms instead, head resting comfortably on his chest as you sigh out in relief. This feels nice. His arms feel warm and comfortable. It’s warmer than it was when you were just under the covers.

“You still mad?”

“‘M not mad anymore. You’re forgiven.” Changbin grins, threading his fingers through your hair gently to help you sleep quicker. He knows you’re tired, from the way you drawl out your words, and the way you simply collapse into him.

He rests his free arm around you comfortably, just by your hips, and he continues to look down at you attentively in case you jolt awake in need of something. He only completely relaxes when he hears soft snores from you.

Placing a soft kiss on the top of your head, Changbin allows himself to shut his own tired eyes closed. Even though he had been exhausted from the events of the day prior, he finds he’d do it all over again for you if you asked him to.

As for you, you’re not quite sure you want to drink as hard as you did today. One thing you are sure of is you never want to leave, with your head resting just below Changbin’s neck, and his hand running through your hair.

You don’t wanna be anywhere else but with the one person you trust the most.

#k-labels #stray kids fic #changbin x reader #seo changbin x reader #changbin x you #stray kids changbin #stray kids changbin x reader #stray kids au #seo changbin #changbin imagines #changbin au #stray kids fluff #changbin fluff #stray kids scenarios #stray kids oneshots #changbin scenarios #seo changbin scenarios #stray kids imagine #stray kids fanfic #stray kids x reader #skz changbin #skz x reader #skz x reader fic #skz x you #skz fluff #skz imagines

[bbyquokka]

changbin x gender neutral reader | genre: fluff | warnings: none | words: 0.5k ~ (583) 🐷🐰ㆍ₊⊹

late nights in the studio with changbin would consist of you two working together in the dimly lit room. both of you dressed in comfy clothing, changbin in sweats and an olive oversized hoodie, the hood over his head, the beak of his black cap peaking out with his curls covering his eyes. the harsh screen of the computer screen would illuminate his face, showing and accentuating his facial features; his plump lips, soft skin, long lashes, textured skin and his cute button nose! soft melodies of lofi music playing in the background whilst you sit next to changbin on the spare swivel chair, watching him work. it's late and you don't have to be there, but you miss him and want to spend time with him. changbin would occasionally ask for your opinion on the track he is working on, passing you the headphones and playing the track where you'd listen and give him criticism on what's good and what's not. changbin takes your criticism to heart because he values and treasures you. every now and then, he would place his hand on your thigh and give it a squeeze, leaning in and kissing your lips sweetly and telling you that he loves you. he'd order food for you both and that would be the time where he would take a break. you'd sit on the floor of the studio facing each other with the take-out in the middle. you'd talk about anything and everything, changbin asking you about your day and listening so carefully and attentively, his undivided attention on you. he’s been at the studio all day and he's missed his other half; his soulmate. he'd sometimes make you blush with his suggestive jokes that’d be paired with a smirk and raised eyebrow. changbin can work day and night (with the help of a red bull or two) but you, on the other hand, love your sleep. soon, you'd start to feel drowsy, the number on your phone screen reading ‘1:20’. you'd tell changbin you're just going to rest your eyes to try and recharge, not planning on falling asleep but as soon as your heavy body sinks into the sofa and your head hits the square cushion that has a giant YouTube logo on it, do you crash. changbin wouldn't notice at first. he'd be talking to himself, explaining certain things, completely unaware of his sleeping beauty behind him. he'd call your name out several times and turn in his seat when you don't answer. his heart would swell, butterflies in his stomach. a big, dumb grin plastered on his face before standing from his seat. he'd drape a blanket over your body before taking his hoodie off and tucking it under your arm as you would if you were to cuddle a plushie. he'd feel guilty for not spending time with you and making you stay for so long (even though you insisted you wanted to be there) but the guilt is quickly casted aside when he hears his name being called from you in a soft and needy tone and his hoodie being snuggled, his calming scent tickling your nostrils and making you squirm a little. changbin would quickly rush back to his seat, his cheeks pink and flush and body burning up. “now is not the time for dirty thoughts, changbin.” he'd mumble to himself, giving himself a pep talk to calm himself down (maybe even giving his cheek a gentle slap) before resuming his work.

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[zeroeightzeroone]

in this lifetime and the next - seo changbin

genre: angst? sad? hurt? idk two exes are talking about their past relationship

pairing: ex-boyfriend, non-idol!seo changbin x ex-girlfriend!femreader

notes: if this looks familiar, my secondary blog 'zerothreetwentyfive ' was deleted by tumblr (idk why) so i'm republishing everything here on my main blog.

wc ~2.5k | moodboard

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:

"how…" he clears his throat, "how have you been?"

his eyes are fixed on the night sky. even with the knowledge that he isn't looking in your direction, you still shrug before replying, "i've been… okay."

if someone told you three years ago you'd be lying under the millions of stars sparkling up within the dark night sky, next to your ex-boyfriend, you would've been convinced that person was out of their mind. especially, if that person told you that throughout the trip you would find yourselves alone together coincidentally, eventually finding yourselves sober and in the comfort of your ex-partner laid next to you. a cool breeze drifting by once in a while and everyone else who came onto the trip were either drunk or passed out inside the cottage. 

you really would've called an intervention. convinced that they were far too delusional for their own good.

then again, you from three years ago would have never believed there'd come a day when your boyfriend would become your ex. where he would become someone of your past. you from three years ago could not even fathom, nor entertain the possibility of being away from the man, of living without the man. the man you loved more than anything or anyone. a statement that holds true to this day.

truthfully, you believed that he would be the one you would love and be loved by for eternity. believing that you waited your whole life, for everything in the universe to align, paving the path to meet the man you were fated for, the man you would call the one:

seo changbin.

"work's been good? school? life?" changbin's voice is quite soft and his tone is a bit awkward. 

he's tiptoeing around his words, trying to figure out how you feel about him. weighing out what you could and couldn't speak about or if you should be speaking at all. the thought of overstepping and potentially making you uncomfortable sits in the back of his mind.

"they've been… more or less the same," you answer.

it's different without you, you think to yourself. 

his absence was something you could never get used to after the breakup. three years later and that sense of emptiness looms over your head.  

"i got promoted last year," you add.

"oh really? that's great to hear!" changbin's tone is excited but at the same time it's uneasy.

of course, he's excited, and he's proud of you but he still doesn't know how you feel about him right now. what if he makes you uncomfortable with too much excitement? or a lack of excitement? changbin's treading lightly.

"… uh… sorry–"

"—how about you? how have you been?" you're quick to cut him off. 

if you didn't, changbin would go on rambling and apologizing; something you picked up on very early into your relationship. the man lying next to you apologizes for everything, regardless of if he is at fault or not. even if there is no fault, he finds himself apologizing anyway.

"last i remember you were working a big project."

changbin blinks, taken aback by the sudden interruption but he composes himself quickly, "o-oh! i've been doing good as well. happy that it's done."

"how'd it go?" you wonder.

"it was... definitely a lot more than we expected to take on. the clients decided they wanted to expand more on their vision. change up a lot of pre-made plans."

"ah, i see... i can't tell if that's good or bad?"

"i'd say it's both," you can hear the slight smile in his tone, "a lot of work done being scrapped which, y'know, isn't exactly ideal. but they agreed to pay us more which is good. i'd say we were rewarded adequately for the work we put in."

you hum, "well, then, i'm happy for you."

silence looms in the air between the two of you. neither of you knows what to say to the other, how to continue a conversation. 

the both of you stare up at the stars overhead; most of which you aren't able to see on a daily due to the light pollution in the city. while there is a silence that has fallen between you two, it's not an uncomfortable one. neither of you are itching to escape an awkward atmosphere, to escape being around your ex. instead you find yourselves in a comfortable space in the presence of the one lying next to you.

basking in a presence neither of you has had the opportunity to be comforted by, let alone be around, in the past three years.

you find yourself instinctively fiddling with the ends of your hoodie sleeves, pulling them over your hands and hiding them inside. beside you, changbin adjusts his arm to rest behind his head while the other one rests on his stomach.

"y'know what this reminds me of?" he says suddenly, in a hushed tone, "reminds me of our two-year anniversary."

tearing your eyes off the sky, you turn your head to changbin's direction. 

you let your eyes linger on him for a moment. entranced by how the stars and the moon illuminate his features in such a soft and gentle manner. it's been three years since you've been this physically close to changbin, let alone seen the man, you can't help but analyze his features like it's the first time. looking over the features you fell in love with way back when.

changbin looks just as amazing as ever, maybe even more attractive. he still sports those soft, dark curls in his shaggy hair that falls right under his eyes. he's more buff in comparison to when you last saw him three years ago.

the longer you let your eyes look over him, the more you're taken back, that sense of nostalgia washing over you. he's right, this moment is reminiscent of your two-year anniversary. 

you remember the months leading up to that day as if it were yesterday.

you remember repeatedly asking your boyfriend how you two should celebrate the milestone that was coming just around the corner. in response, he would always say he would be the one to take care of everything and that all you needed to do was sit back and relax. 

the boy was clad in light blue denim jeans, a navy varsity-styled jacket with a white shirt underneath, his hair tousled as it fell in front of his black-rimmed glasses when he knocked at your door. greeting your family before whisking you away for a night you will never forget.

changbin quite literally drove you off into the sunset, one hand gripping the wheel whilst his other held your hand in his. the both of you belting out to the playlist you created together, one that grew as each day passed. 

by the time you arrived at your destination, the sun had set behind the skyline as the dark sky loomed over the city. you remember the way your jaw slacked in awe at the breathtaking sight of all the stars. 

"i've never been this close to the stars! they're so much closer from up here!" 

you stood there gaping at the stars for what felt like eternity, while changbin stood beside you, his eyes full of affection as he stared at you. oh, his eyes. you would think he captured the stars in his eyes with the way they sparkled at the sight of you. that night on the hill, you and changbin were laid next to each other on the hood of his car, cuddled in each other's arms as you talked about anything and everything that came into your minds.

there you were in the arms of your lover, alone together in your own starry heaven. everything seized to exist other than you and your intertwined hearts.

you and changbin, together against the world.

nothing will ever come close to that level of perfection. that ethereal moment you've etched into your brain, you'd much rather be damned than to have that moment wiped from your memory.

"yeah… it does. the sky, the stars… just... everything brings me back."

"it was definitely not as chilly that night," changbin smiles.

half of his statement refers to the weather and the other half refers to how you were huddled up next to him that night. as opposed to now, where the space between your bodies lets in a cool draft.

you chuckle and shake your head, "the weather was great, not too hot and not too cold. just perfect."

lying next to him, reminiscing on your two-year anniversary as a couple has a question popping up in your minds.

if given the chance, would you go back? would you choose each other again?

the question is nothing new. a recurring thought over the past three years. 

over the past three years, you've collected a pool of unanswered questions regarding your relationship with changbin: the how's, what's, when's and why's. how could you not wonder? nothing in the world could surpass your love for seo changbin.

three years later and you have never loved as deeply as you have for the man beside you.

you're both listening to the steady breaths of the one lying next you as both your minds run a mile a minute. allowing a brief silence to settle before changbin is the one to break the silence.

"i'm sorry."

"sorry? ...for what?"

"just… everything."

when you turn to look in changbin's direction, your eyes meet for the first time that night. god, it feels as if your heart stopped at that exact moment. the delay was so long you could have dropped dead right there.

but you lived off the way your eyes locked with changbin's. finding your breath again with each twinkle of the stars reflecting off his black-rimmed glasses. finding your pulse starting up again, this time beating out of your chest as his deep brown eyes bore into your own. breathing the life back into you.

your gazes soften, a wave of nostalgia washing over the both of you; a memory of what you once had together.

a breath of the life you shared three years ago.

you stare at each other wordlessly. soaking in a feeling of comfort neither of you has felt in three years, one you only received from the one lying next to you.

"i'm sorry too. for everything."

"it's not your fault," he shakes his head, "i fell short in the end and i wasn't the boyfriend you deserved."

you're shaking your own head, "i was a terrible girlfriend. i wouldn't have stayed with me either."

"you were–are– amazing," changbin states, "you've always been."

"that's not true. don't say that, i know i hurt you with the things i said."

somewhere along the line of your relationship with changbin, things started to go awry. your lives began to clash; school and work priorities building and creating distance between you two. it felt like your relationship was slowly slipping away, schedules ran tight and pressures ran high. 

you remember petty arguments, the back-and-forth bickering between the both of you when you were able to see each other. 

"and i hurt you. i was never there when you needed me, i promised you that you could trust me, depend on me but i broke that in the end."

"that's not your fault. i couldn't be there when you needed me either."

"and that wasn't your fault either, our schedules didn't line up anymore."

"but… i could've tried har—"

"there was only so much we could do and you tried your absolute hardest," changbin interrupts you, "time just... wasn't on our side."

you hate to admit that even without the petty, groundless arguments, the end was inevitable. 

your relationship no longer fit into the other's increasingly hectic schedule, any and all the attempts came with sacrifices with school or work, and in the end, there was no healthy way to incorporate that time for each other. all the time you did spend together was plagued by stress and high tensions, only pushing you two further apart. 

no matter how hard you tried to salvage your relationship, everything else tried even harder to ruin it.  

the anger and dejection only grew stronger as time passed. the both of you wondering why things weren't going your way no matter how hard you worked for it. you felt dejected that your efforts came without fruition. upset that the time you did have together was limited, fleeting and full of the pressures your individual lives were weighing on you. 

"can i ask something?" your voice is almost inaudible but changbin hums in response, "why did you leave when you did?"

changbin blinks slowly as he processes your words.

"i didn't want things to get worse."

"what do you mean?"

"i didn't want to end things between us on a bad note. for us to part ways hating each other."

"i could never hate you."

"maybe, but we'd grow to resent each other even if we didn't mean to. wondering if our efforts were in vain, that no matter how hard we tried the universe worked harder against us."

"did you… resent me in the end?"

"i would've rather died instead of growing to hate or resent you."

your head snaps in his direction and his to yours. your eyes wide with shock at how he said that without hesitation.

"what we had between us, i didn't want it to be overshadowed by months of arguing."

changbin has never loved anyone the way he loves you. 

early on in your relationship, changbin wholeheartedly believed you were the best thing to ever happen to him. no one cared for him, accepted him and understood him in the way you did. no one made him as happy as you did.

when he realized that your relationship became a source of stress in your increasingly hectic lives, he made the difficult decision to leave.

the people that come in and out of your life come either as a blessing or a lesson; changbin believes you are a blessing in his life.

people slip in and out of your life, fuck around and make you rethink everything. the memories of them are associated with the phrases: "i should have known better" or "you learn from your mistakes".

and he would rather be damned than to be a lesson.

he knew that with the direction both your lives were headed into at the time, the end was inevitable and if things between you two had to end then, in your out-of-control lives, he wanted the last semblance of control here.

"the thought of losing you scared me shitless," changbin continues, "but what scared me even more was that you could one day regret all of this, everything we had. that you would leave regretting ever loving me."

"… i didn't know you were thinking that way," your voice trails off at the end, thoughts still delayed as you process the words of your ex-boyfriend lying next to you.

you take a moment before you continue.

"at one point, i wasn't even mad or upset with you anymore... i was mad at the universe. the circumstances."

when you and changbin broke up, you often wondered what the universe had in store for you after such excruciating heartbreak. but the pain didn't even stop with changbin; it seemed like the universe had it against you as else in your life began to downward spiral. 

you struggled to adjust to the growing hustle and bustle of your life while also struggling to adapt without your person.

oftentimes, you imagined taking a trek up to climb the tallest mountain in the world. exerting all that blood, sweat and tears for the opportunity to let everything out into the void. you imagined standing on the highest point on earth would be as physically close as you could get to the universe. 

maybe from up there, the universe would be able to hear the desperation, the pain that came from wondering what you did to deserve this; to have loved so passionately and to have lost, to experience such excruciating pain.

if the universe didn't align for a life with changbin, you laid awake wondering what it did align for. if it would be worth it. 

what could be more worth it than him? 

with a bittersweet smile on your lips you say, "nothing aligned for us in this lifetime. maybe, in the next lifetime."

you're trying your hardest to control and suppress your emotions as your eyes gloss over, tears threatening to fall. changbin's eyes stay fixed on you as he, much like you did earlier, analyzes your features all over again as if it was the first time.

changbin pays close attention to every detail, etching it into his mind.

"whose to say that?" changbin's eyes meet your own once again, a glint present in his chocolate brown orbs, "this lifetime isn't over yet."

your eyes, still blown wide with surprise, meet changbin's. you would think he captured the stars in his eyes with the way they sparkled at the sight of you.

"in this lifetime and the next, i'll love you."

"does that mean you'll love me for eternity?"

"our love is so strong it transcends lifetimes. we'll always find our way back to each other."

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