#sam should beat the absolute dogshit out of him

[williamsockner]

John Winchester Saltpile

A short list of John Winchester’s dogshit ways he screwed up his kids. Just from what we see in the first two and a half seasons - we’re not even to the truly horrible stuff yet!

- Routinely leaves children under the age of ten alone in motel rooms for weeks with nothing but canned food, a box of cereal and a shotgun, and instructions to never leave the room.

- Disowns Sam for going to college. Maintains this narrative to the point that Dean adopts the idea that Sam “abandoned” and “rejected” them by going off to get an education.

- Actively prevents Dean from developing any ties by keeping him from having friendships or relationships.

- Never calls his goddamn kids back even when they leave him tearful voicemails about how one of them is dying, sulks when they bitch him out on this point. Seems to think that calling them back basically ever is just not compatible with a hunter’s schedule. Guilt-trips them into believing he just loved them too much to stay in contact, despite sending them into harm’s way frequently.

- Convinces Dean and then tries to convince Sam that the reason he disowned Sam was that he just loved Sam too much.

- Isolates the boys from the extent of the hunter underworld just because he feels guilty around Ellen Harvelle for getting her husband killed, thus ensuring that they have fewer resources to draw on for doing their job and protecting themselves and can’t connect with people who share hunting and road life in common.

- On that note, doesn’t even leave the boys with the journal, just hopes they find it, and honestly does an absolutely terrible job of telling them about hunting techniques and information about demons that would be really, really helpful in hunting said demons.

- Sends the boys after the shtriga so Dean can beat himself up with guilt for all the children the shtriga has killed over the years, instead of being like “hey, kid, you were ten years old and you left a motel room you’d been stuck in for days to play at the arcade for an hour and that was it, it’s not really your fault that the monster got away and killed tens of little kids.”

- Somehow pisses off Bobby to the point that the boys are afraid Bobby won’t help them and don’t see him for years, which keeps them away from the only real source of love and support they have in the world.

- Militarizes Dean enough to be a perfect sharp-shooter at age six.

- Doesn’t provide his children with enough food when he dumps them in motel rooms for weeks, ensuring Dean has to go hungry just to make sure Sam gets enough to eat.

- Decides that the perfect moment to start berating Sam for not making an agonizing split decision is while his other kid is bleeding to death in a stupor in the back of the car.

- Decides to keep Sam “innocent” while grooming Dean for monster-hunting, establishing that his children can’t have an honest relationship with each other growing up.

- Ruins Christmas.

- Apparently figures out the entire demon and angels plotline and yet, rather than providing anyone with this information or writing it down, uses his dying words to tell Dean he might have to put Sam down like a dog, because, you know, fuck actually having a conversation with Sam or anything.

- Somehow ascends to Heaven anyway because he bodyslammed a demon and made sad faces. ):

But honestly the part that annoys me the most about John is that the show itself puts all this stuff out there and then doesn’t actually commit to acknowledging that John’s a maliciously terrible parent and a terrible person (and not just a “troubled” one or one who was “trying his best”) until Season 3. John’s not just a neglectful father who was too invested in a lifestyle that was incompatible with childrearing, John’s an actively manipulative scumbag who consciously sabotages his kids over decades. Miss me with that stuff about how he just wanted to keep them safe, because if he had he wouldn’t have isolated them from critical resources or sent them into harm’s way all the time or pit them against each other so frequently or used guilt to manipulate them into giving him his way or like, disowned Sam and then made the story that it was all Sam’s fault.

The show frequently seems to write a villain but have them serve the narrative purpose of a sympathetic protagonist for John and it’s only midway through S3 that they really start to thread the needle, and even then the show’s stance tends to fall closer to “John was neglectful and unintentionally abusive” rather than “John is actively a consciously abusive parent” - which, you know, if they wanted that, they shouldn’t have put the consciously malicious parenting in there in the first place. The fandom seems to have never gotten the memo and I still see a lot of “well, he was trying! he was just misguided! it’s really debatable if it was abuse!” flying around with regards to John. It’s the apologism - both textual and in fandom - that’s elevated John to one of my least favorite fictional characters ever.

I’d say he should get hit by a truck but he already did. I’m not even through S3 and I know it gets worse.

#spookernaturalz #stupidnatural #i love this show #also fuck john winchester #the actual worst #is it S5 with the scene where he leaves 16 y/o Dean to rot in jail for shoplifting food? #Dean in the dreamworld finally yelling `i didn't deserve any of that` has been the most satisfying part of the emotional arc for him #that started about five episodes into S1 #rewatching makes me so appreciative of Sam too #my love for the boy grows every day for being the more clear-eyed one about their fuckawful dad #it makes me sad that he loses some of that clarity in later seasons #anyway i can't sleep still so you're getting salt

[recommendedlisten]

It’s been awhile since Recommended Listen has done one of these, but back by popular (content) demand, the weekly Best of the Rest column has returned to highlight the rest of the week’s great music you should know. Leading into it, Massachusetts DIY scene favs Future Teens and Dump Him both tried to figure out ways to move forward while Big Thief are proving to be unstoppable with their creative genius. The return of Vivian Girls is arguably being enjoyed more so the second time around, Chelsea Wolfe’s natural instincts are giving us even more reasons to appreciate her dark art, and NYC post-punks Bodega continue to live up to the promise of being shiny new models. Meanwhile, Field Mouse succeeded at finding meaning in everything as modern punk scene cult hero Chris Faren searched for his within a screen. There’s a lot more to cover here, so let's get down to the music business.

Here’s the best of the rest from the week of August 11th, 2019…

Antagonize - Slip Death EP [Triple B Records]

The last time I saw Aaron Bedard, he was being showered in balloons and kids walking all over each others’ heads as part of the final bow of Bane, the seminal melodic hardcore band who very much helped make the New England hardcore scene what it is today. Bedard returned to the stage a year ago with a new band called Antagonize, and after throwing down some demos and promos, they’ve released their debut EP Slip Death on the great Boston hardcore label Triple B Records this past week (label leader Sam Yarmuth designed its cover art much like he did for the vinyl reissue of the 2001 Bane classic Give Blood.) Bedard’s intensity has not slowed down with the passing of time either. In fact, it’s become exponentially more confrontational as he and the band thrash through fast, visceral existentialist dread. Throw them on a bill with the likes of Fury, Fiddlehead, Turnstile, or any of the countless names coming out of the Triple B roster right now, and Antagonize -- and Bedard -- know exactly what the scene needs at this moment.

Slip Death by ANTAGONIZE

Charli XCX feat. Sky Ferreira - “Cross You Out” [Atlantic Records]

On September 13th, Charli XCX will release her long awaited “proper” third studio effort Charli. Between years of experimental EPs and one-off singles, it’s been awhile since we heard her target her vision for mass consumption with major label approal, and she’s bringing some of music’s most intriguing voices into the fold with her to get that across. We already heard her team with Lizzo on “Blame It On Your Love” and Christine and the Queens for “Gone”. Its latest preview “When You’re Not Around” is one for Twitter pop fandom, however, as it sees Charli XCX joining forces with Sky Ferreira on the A.G. Cook-produced track. The two artists have been heralded as pop music’s most underrated creators for the better part of this decade, so to hear Charli and Ferreira’s paths cross seamlessly into this digital slowburn as they put the collective shit they’ve dealt with personally over the years behind them is a fitting way for it to happen.

Code Orange - “Let Me In” [WWE Music]

At least weekend’s WWE Summerslam, rebooted horror heel Bray Wyatt returned after months of being kept off screen in action with a brand new character persona called the Fiend that saw him evolving from the creepy bayou cult leader of previous and into a psychotic children’s program host who turns into a deranged monster wearing a mask designed by horror film makeup legend Tom Savini. In helping get this new terrifying character’s image over with the crowd and viewers watching was Code Orange, one of the most exciting bands in hardcore and metal going right now, who reinterpreted Wyatt’s old theme “Live In Fear”, a sinister, swampy piece of occult rock originally recorded by Mark Crozier, under its new name “Let Me In” and making it into their own heavy pummeling likeness, adding layers of deeper darkness to Wyatt’s Fiend character in the process. This isn’t Code Orange Kids first foray in soundtracking WWE superstars' themes, as they backed Incendiary’s Brendan Gorrone live as goth anti-hero Aleister Black made his way to ring during NXT Takeover Brooklyn III. Now that Black is on the main roster, inevitably he will cross paths with the Fiend at some point, making you wonder where Code Orange's loyalty will lie...

The Highwomen - “Highwomen” [Low Country Sound / Elektra Records]

The Highwomen -- a.k.a. the country songwriting supergroup of Brandi Carlile, Maren Morris, Amanda Shires, and Natalie Hemby -- are one of the most exciting things to happen to country music this year. On September 6th, they will release their eponymous debut album, and to date, the foursome have proven themselves quickly to be working flawlessly as a well-woven collective where nothing remotely resembling an ego outshine the other in its first coupling of singles “Redesigning Women” and “Crowded Table”. It’s latest is a goosebump-inducing sunset song that hears each member sharing a piece of the narrative that tell a greater story about their ability to overcome all and any hurdle. “We are the daughters of the silent generations / You send our hearts to die alone in foreign nations,” their voices collect in its final moments. “They may return to us as tiny drops of rain / But we will still remain/ And we’ll come back again and again and again.

Miranda Lambert - “Bluebird” [RCA Nashville / Vanner Records]

Beyond the Highwomen, Miranda Lambert is now joining the highly anticipated of new Nashville releases with her seventh studio effort Wildcard, due out on November 1st. Her last effort was the excellently crafted post-divorce catharsis The Weight of These Wings, but judging by the sounds of WIldcard’s first single “Bluebird”, Lambert is getting back to her old high jinks of sorry not sorry whip-smart lyricism and folding them into cool, flawless country-pop. “And if the house just keeps on winning / I got a wildcard up on my sleeve / And  if love keeps giving me lemons / I'll just mix 'em in my drink,” goes its chorus. Lambert’s undefeated streak will likely continue with this as well as her tour behind the LP, which sees her bringing along her Pistol Annies sisters, Maren Morris, and Ashley McBridge along for the ride on select dates for her Roadside Guitars and Pink Guitars tour, kicking off in September.

Octo Octa - “Can You See Me?” [T4T LUV NRG]

Back in July, Octo Octa, the electronic dance outlet of Maya Bouldry-Morrison, dropped “Spin Girl, Let’s Activate”, the leadoff single from her forthcoming third album Resonant Body, set for release on September 6th. The listen was fully in motion with a bright luminosity radiating from with Bouldry-Morrison she says was inspired after a year of tremendous change and personal growth. That expanded energy extends even further in its subsequent listen “Can You See Me?” in which she allows emotions to overflow onto the soundboard through an empath in samples vocals and a cosmic tidal of synth arpeggios running through whichever cracks in its constant break beats they can find. It’s invigorating, and both as a measure of her art and being, there’s really no avoiding Octa Octa’s presence being made known here.

(Sandy) Alex G - “Southern Sky” / “Near” [Domino Records]

Rocket was a very special album in the prolific catalog of (Sandy) Alex G, though it wouldn’t be a surprise if the experimental indie pop wunderkind’s new album House of Sugar, set for release on September 13th, bests it in its own way. So far, we’ve heard the warped and rickety storytale standout “Gretel” and the earnest ode to a friend and place passed on “Hope”, and this past week, he introduced two more in “Southern Sky” and “Near”. The former, which includes an animated video by frequent visual collaborator Elliot Bech, is a country-stained sigh featuring Emily Yacina that hits a similar backwoods bliss that “Bobby” did two years ago, while the latter retreats to pinbacked repetition, wonky loops and samples that warp the canvas with Alex Giannascoli’s signature smeared fingerprints. (Sandy) Alex G will also be touring extensively behind the effort starting this October, with dates featuring the likes of Tomberlin, ARTHUR and Corey Flood.

Taylor Swift - “Lover” [Republic Records]

The last we heard of Taylor Swift was her divisive post-pop call-out Reputation, and with its tinge of industrial bangers and stadium-translating success, it’s safe to say it aged better than what anyone expected upon release. Her new album Lover is on the way next week, and so far, two of its early singles have been absolute dogshit while the other was just so-so. In the streaming era, it comes no surprise that there will be 18 tracks total on the album, which means there’s bound to be some duds. Hopefully they’re more like it’s title track, though. Jack Antonoff seems to be one of the few people who knows what to do with making Swift sound like a breath of fresh air in spite of her missteps in this lash-batting late night bar crawler that is the Jekyll to Swifty’s drunken Hyde. She really could have reverted full-on back to country-pop and easily gotten away with it...

Queen of Jeans - “Only Obvious to You” [Topshelf Records]

The surprises within Queen of Jeans’ sound are unraveling themselves quickly, but in subtle gestures leading up to the dreamy Philly indie-pop band’s release next week of their sophomore effort If you’re not afraid, I’m not afraid. So far, they’ve delivered a devastating blow to the ego in doo-wop form with "U R My Guy” and searched for a way out of a dead end relationship on “All the Same”. “Only Obvious to You” steps away from pastel lights and balloon grandeur, leaving plenty of room fordark space in between two warm bodies for the distance to hit hard. “Love will fuck you over hard,” Miriam Devora repeatedly reminds herself in the listen’s closing moments, and in the listen’s video shot at Philly Pride, they want to do their community a solid by letting it be known that no matter how you love, pain is pain, and your feelings are valid, too. This autumn, they’ll be mending broken hearts on the road alongside tourmates From Indian Lakes.

Whitney - “Used to Be Lonely” [Secretly Canadian]

Someone in Whitney’s camp had to have intentionally planned to have the Chicago country soul duo’s sophomore effort Forever Turned Around be released at the final breaths of summer and the cusp of autumn’s cupping season on August 30th, because “Used to Be Lonely” is the kind of listen that tugs at the heartstrings of both the, uh, lonely and not so lonely, in a way that will make those with someone feel warm gratitude to have someone by their side, and those who don’t romanticize about the day it happens to them. Its accompanying visuals, directed by Austin Vesely, are on point just as well, as it captures a budding romance developing at the kind of midwestern country fair in a small town you’d hit up some weekend in September when you could use a slice of simplicity in your life of how even the most humble moments can feel extraordinary if you’re sharing them with the right person. If not, Whitney will bring it to you when they roll through your city this autumn.

#the best of the rest #songs #antagonize #charli xcx #sky ferreira #code orange #the highwomen #miranda lambert #octo octa #(sandy) alex g #taylor swift #queen of jeans #whitney #new music & videos

[insidethegiftbasket]

Jameson Taillon

Jaaaaaaaaaa-mo! I say Jaaaaaaaaaa-mo! No, I did that with O’Day. Shit. Okay. Let’s do a whiskey joke, because of Jameson? I don’t know enough about whiskey for that—I’m a vodka man. Oh, I can just joke about the Pirates being an absolute dumpster fire franchise that has more on-field turnover than Tony Romo in a playoff game. But that’s a bit lazy, isn’t it? Eh, screw it. Unrelated, but thematically sound reference time.

Welcome Inside the Gift Basket of Jameson Taillon.

How Did I Get Here?

Jameson Taillon is the latest victim of the Pittsburgh Pirates. A few years ago, after they finally let Cutch go and dedicated themselves to building something new from the ground up around quality young pieces like Gerrit Cole, Jameson Taillon, and Josh Bell, well, none of these guys play for the Pirates anymore. But that’s what the Pirates do. They talk out of both sides of their mouths while putting absolute dogshit on the field. They’re the reason the sport needs a salary floor. At least the Rays and A’s try and put a competitive team out there and both are perennial playoff participants. The Pirates are a disgrace, and Taillon should be thrilled that they’re no longer his beautiful house or beautiful wife.

Oh right, the breakdown. Sorry. JMo as he likes to be called is 29, he’s right handed, he’s still in arbitration this year and next and is making just 2.25M this year. We got him for literally nothing. He’s coming off of Tommy John surgery and hasn’t pitched since 2019, and he has a very unfortunate hairline. He’s going to be one of those guys that his friends are going to beg him to just shave it all off and go for the bald look somewhere around his 33rd birthday. He’s going to be a major piece of our rotation if he can stay healthy.

Letting The Days Go By

Since entering the league in 2016, Taillon has basically only had 1 actual complete season. 2016 was a rookie call up. 2017 he had some minor injuries that limited him to 25 starts (not bad). 2019 he blew out his elbow and needed TJS. But, in 2018, he started all 32 starts you pencil a guy in for and man was he a dude out there.

Look at that 2018. That’s a season right there. Sure, it’s not the most mind blowing numbers you’ve ever seen. He’s not Prime Pedro. But you take that 2018 every single time. You trade for Taillon in the hopes that he gets back to being that guy post-TJS, same as he ever was. And the advanced numbers back up the traditional stats.

Even with a slightly above average WHIP and BABIP, he basically told guys to fuck off once they actually made it to the basepaths. A near 80% LOB% is just absolutely dumb for a starter. Relievers post numbers like that. Starters, especially starters on bad teams like the 2018 Pirates should absolutely be letting more of those guys come around to score.

Well, the reason he was able to get out of so many situations with the score intact has to do with this chart.

You don’t get a lot of 5-pitch pitchers in the MLB these days, but he’s one of the few true 5-pitch guys. Throwing his heater less than 40% of the time, and tossing between 3 and 6 changes a game, he mixes speeds from 95 to 82 and hits all parts of the zone with one pitch or another.

And perhaps most importantly, his offspeed stuff are his true plus pitches, and they play so well coming off that 95MPH gas that he can get to any part of the zone.

And yeah, he can put the ball wherever he wants, more or less, but look where he loves to live.

This is a man who was made ready for the launch angle revolution. He keeps the ball down, down, down, down and gets people swing over the top and beat it into the dirt, or try to get under it and just send a lazy fly out into the blue again. Which, yup. Look at these batted ball stats. Almost 80% of his balls in play are way up or way down and he does not get a lot of hard contact either—in no small part due to the ability to keep guys off balance with the speed differentials.

If he can cut down on the walks a bit, which you can see he is a bit prone to, he can become someone truly elite. Like, for real. Like top of the rotation type of guy. Yankees got him for literal nothing. Just a once in a lifetime chance for both him and us.

Time Isn’t Holding Up, Time Isn’t After Us

Well, what’s the future hold for Taillon?

I don’t know why all the projections are building in 2 missed months for him given that he’s fully recovered from TJS and isn’t on any kind of innings limit that we’ve been made aware of. But, that said, if you just scale everything up by a few starts you’re looking a guy you’d probably pay $15-20M for on the open market. Again. We got him for Miguel Yajure and no one. Life is good if you’re team trading with the Pirates after the money’s gone.

Water Flowing Underground Prediction

He gets hurt again, as he’s been a bit prone to do and we’re the post-2018 Yankees and we all get hurt constantly. I think Jake Junis cursed this team somehow. Anyway, he gets hurt and doesn’t pitch much and we look to his 2022 with maybe some optimism.

Behind the Wheel of a Large Automobile Prediction

He does exactly what I said could happen above. He stays healthy, gets us at least 27 starts and pitches well during them. Even in the AL East he has the potential post an ERA in the mid-to-low 3’s and be a 15-win type guy, slotting in as a key piece of the rotation at #2 or #3 depending on how Kluber shakes out. He’s young, has good stuff, doesn’t have much mileage on his arm, and is not going to be under much pressure with the Yankee offense out there behind him. He might just go off the charts. It’s entirely possible.

Evan’s Official What Do Talking Heads Have to Do with Jameson Taillon? Gift Basket Prediction

I think he’s gonna crush it. I think the optimism with him is more than well-deserved and I think we’re going to be treated to something really special with him over the course of the year. Him and Cole are going to make a terrifying 1-2 punch and THEN Taillon is going to win over the fanbase forever and ever more with some big time games in the playoffs, including a humungous Game 2 win in the World Series that sets us on the path to a 4-2 series win over the San Diego Padres.

Join us tomorrow when Sam takes you Inside the Gift Basket on a bunch of prospects!

(And to answer my own question: JMo and Talking Heads are related in that I really like the both of them.)

#New York Yankees #Yankees #MLB #Baseball #Jameson Taillon #Breakdown