#right now im sitting doing nothing with no prospects and i can just hollowly blame myself and my environment for it

[skunkes]

#ive identified my current issue and its that im incapable of Choosing to do something bc of the Punishment of Choice #right now im sitting doing nothing with no prospects and i can just hollowly blame myself and my environment for it #if i chose to pay to get certs for a job or went back to school for another degree and i hated the outcome (job) #then its all my fault and i wasted money. #but my issue is like. i dont care enough about anything either...! all jobs will suck bc they are a job. shouldnt i just throw a dart #and go for one? ill always hate it. but what if i REALLY hate it and suck at it. idk. jealous of ppl who have and stick #to a calling that makes money. and have the brain for it. #torn rn bc someone suggested going into IT since u can just get a cert(s) vs a degree... #looking into it and its like well what if i hate it. ill hate any job but what if i really hate it and i wasted time and dollars. #what if im too stupid to do it. what if i dont even get a jawb. ill end up as i am rn but now its Worse and My Fault. ykwim #but like what else am i doing and what else would i even do? 0 direction rn. idk. im so lost #talkys