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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time.

do you remember playing werewolf/mafia in school or at a party? the game where a few people are secretly assigned werewolf roles, each night they kill someone from the village, and each day everyone lets the mob mentality accusations fly as village tries to vote out the wolves? well, you can find communities online playing absolutely wild tricked-out role-madness elaborately-themed-with-long-writeups-and-plots versions and it's wonderful.

so a few years ago some friends and i ran a Red vs Blue theme game, mostly with friends who were not familiar with the series. we knew it was going to be a wild time but there was nothing that could have prepared us for exactly how it went down.

you see, no one knows each others' roles (the character, their affiliation, and any special abilities) in werewolf except for the wolves knowing each other. somehow, despite this and most of the players not knowing the source material, they were fucking possessed by the spirits of their roles - this is the only explanation i can find for what happened - and things got Immensely Silly. we were watching in mod chat going INSANE.

please, join me as i try to recount our crowdsourced improvisational RvB fanfiction.

so, to set the scene: the introduction

and a basic recount of the rules and mechanics of werewolf in general and this game in particular:

Each player gets assigned a role and are either village or a wolf (or sometimes, a third party). Villagers do not know each other, but wolves all share a group private message to strategize together (thus this is a game of a side with numbers advantage versus a side with information advantage)

Villagers win by eliminating all wolves, wolves win by eliminating/killing all villagers (although the game ends at the point when villagers wouldn't be able to prevent this, i.e. when there are fewer villagers than wolves). Third parties with unique win conditions may also be in a game.

During day phases, each player votes for who to eliminate, and the "winner" dies (note: in this community we use "yeet" for eliminate because it's silly and because the traditional forum werewolf term is "lynch" which like. we're not gonna say that.)

During night phases, wolves choose someone to kill, and any players that were given "powers roles/PRs" with actions they can perform at night can act (e.g. protecting someone so they will not die if wolves target them)

(specific to this game) Each player is assigned to red team or blue team. Reds can only vote to eliminate blues and vice versa (no teamkilling during the day!)

(specific to this game) The first day of the game will be Team Captain selection instead of an elimination. You may only vote for players on your own team.

(specific to this game) Unless otherwise noted, night actions can only be used on members of your team.

(specific to this game) You are each allowed to open one private message thread with a player of your choice on your team.

along with this introduction to the public thread where people try to convince each other of who to eliminate, each player gets their private role message thread. these roles were:

Village:

Church, blue team treestump ("Your main motivation has been to save Tex because of your history, but deep down you know that you'd lay down your life for any of the Blood Gulch Crew. Upon your death, rather than joining the rest of the dead, you will still be allowed to converse with the living on the game thread.")

Sarge, red team tinkerer ("On odd nights, you can create an item and send it to a member of your team. Item functions are subject to mod approval, so get creative! Just remember, violence is always the answer!")

Tex, blue team tracker/oneshot vigilante ("On even nights you can track a player on either team. Once during the game, you can choose to shoot first and ask questions later, killing your target instead of tracking them.")

Simmons, red team back-up ("Enthusiasm is not unrewarded in the military and you've worked your way up Sarge's colon and are the Red Team's second in command. Its clear that this job is not for you because you tend to lose your cool and break down at the slightest psychological provocation. You have no assigned ability at this time, and will inherit the ability of whoever is elected Red Team Captain.")

Tucker, blue team back-up ("If anyone can pick up chicks in a tank, its you! The war itself doesn't bother you, because you'll find any opportunity to shirk duties and spend time at your…..ahem special…rock. This is unfortunate because you seem to be the only one who has any combat ability (besides the "freelancer" mercenaries). You have no assigned ability at this time, and will inherit the ability of whomever is elected Blue Team Captain.")

Caboose, blue team wildcard ("Repeated head injuries, firefights inside your consciousness, and having an A.I. ripped out of your head have progressively deteriorated your mental state to the point where you're pretty much divorced from reality. All you know is that your friends need you! On even nights, you can pick any ability to use on any player, but the chances of failure are high.")

Grif, red team commuter ("After dropping out of Ithaca College, you decided to join up with the USNC. Flailing your way through basic, you've ended the self proclaimed "good-for-nothing-slacker" of the Red Team. Being cynical and selfish has earned you no big fans amongst your squad. Your bottom of the totem pole social status, and constantly being the butt of Sarge's jokes, doesn't stop you from laying down some lead to help your friends (but 48 snack cakes might distract you). Once during the game, you can go take a nap in the supply closet, effectively removing yourself from the game for a night. No one, including Sarge, will be able to find you.")

Sheila, blue team bulletproof ("Despite your big size, treads, and heavy weaponry, you are a kind, calm, and caring A.I. But a tank is a tank and you enjoy blowing stuff up, even if its your own teammates. It can be lonely in deep space stuck in a canyon with a bunch of idiots, but you've managed to strike up a romance with the red team robot, Lopez. You are immune to night kills.")

Donut, red team armour-colour-seer ("The red team rookie. In deep space. In the middle of a war. Surrounded by death and destruction. SOMEONE has to remind everyone what you're fighting for. Someone has to remind people of the finer things in life wine, cheese, wearing colors that match, and waxing codpieces. Growing up in rural Iowa has made you a little…..naive, but friendly. Generally bumbling and incompetent like Caboose (the blue team rookie), your geniality makes everyone tolerate your screw ups. Your armor is lightish red, not pink! On odd nights you can seer a player to find out their armor color. You must alternate teams when choosing your targets."). Donut's response to his role:

Doc, blue team protector ("Too bad you're the WORST medic there is. I mean really? CPR for a bullet wound? What happens if someone gets shot in the foot? You rub aloe vera on their neck? Damn right! You arrive months late and your patient is already dead, but because of budget cuts you are on loan to both the red team and blue team and get caught up in their antics. You take your do no harm vow seriously and are a pacifist....unless there's a murderous rage filled A.I. possessing you. On even nights you can protect a member of your team from being killed.")

Lopez, red team blocker ("You are the closest thing Sarge has to a son and he treats as such. You think Sarge is an annoying pompous jerk. Ever since Sarge damaged your speech unit while installing it you've only been able to speak in spanish and so you can only post in spanish. The blood gulch gang typically use and abuse you, which you resent but can't do anything about. You passive aggressively make comments in spanish that no one can understand. However, the language barrier hasn't stopped you from striking up a passionate romance with the blue team's tank, Sheila. On odd nights, you can block a player of your choice.")

Andy, bomb, as one would expect. ("Despite not having a mouth, you sure as hell like to run yours. The only reason anyone takes your crap is the constant threat of explosion. However, no matter how foul-mouthed, vulgar, and sometimes creative you get, Tex can get you under control. If you are attacked, you will explode, killing yourself and anyone else in the immediate vicinity.") (i also want to note this role was randomly assigned to the sweetest, cutest player possible lmfao)

Wolves:

The Meta, red team reflexive ability seer ("If anyone performs any actions on you, you will find out who they are and what they did.")

Wyoming, red team ninja/bombproof ("Ruthless, cunning, and not afraid to manipulate others to your will, you've always known what its going to take to reach your goals and nothing will stop you. This disregard for regulations and laws extend to the laws of time. Using equipment stolen from the military, you set people in time loops, and overpower them while they're confused. Time travel baffles even the smartest minds, wonder what it does to a bunch of idiots in a box canyon. On even nights you can't be tracked, and on odd nights you can diffuse the bomb - if you correctly target them, you can kill them without killing yourself.") Wyoming's response to this role assignment:

O'Malley, blue team redirector/force-kill/result-thief ("When implanted in other people, you serve to accentuate their own rage and internal desires. On even nights, you can redirect a player on the Blue team to perform their action on someone else. Once during the game you can force them to kill. Once during the game you can steal your target's night results in addition to the redirection.")

Third parties:

Vic, red team treestump jester. ("As is custom for all thing Blood Gulch, you are terrible at your job. Acting as a glorified tech support guy, you offer unhelpful advice and end up complicating things far more than necessary. You answer all calls with "hey dude" or "whats going on dude" which makes everyone question the legitimacy of the operation at hand. You are an independent third party, and will win the game if you are voted out AND the game makes it to the point that the final day has only 3 or 4 players)") [this means Vic wants to keep things even between wolves and villagers, so one side doesn't eliminate the other too quick]

Each player has a role PM that's just them and the mods.

Each player can also open a PM between themself and one person on their team. This can be opened any time and continues for the rest of the game.

Doc PMs Sheila (starting day 1)

Andy PMs Doc (starting day 1)

Caboose PMs Sheila (starting day 2) (oh god. oh god the happenings as a result of this PM. it's. well. you'll see.)

Tucker PMs Caboose (starting day 3) (Tucker immediately regrets it:)

Simmons PMs Grif (starting day 3)

Lopez PMs The Meta (starting day 3)

Church PMs O'Malley (starting day 3)

Sheila PMs Tucker after Tucker bugs her for one incessantly (starting day 4) (it's really cute. I won't include snippets because they're irrelevant but they talk about DnD. blue team DnD nights when.)

The Meta PMs Grif (starting day 5)

Grif PMs Donut, on Donut's request (starting day 5)

Next: day 1

#red vs blue #rvb #red wwersus blue #alexa send post

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: post-credits extras

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The Meta makes Church a really mean certificate:

Mod-awarded superlatives [note: "deepest pockets" means "best at getting people to trust you when you should not be trusted". The imagery is of tucking a tiny, trusting person into your warm, cozy, soft pocket and taking them wherever you want]:

Sheila with DEEPEST POCKETS and Best Fake Panicked Village Performance at Endgame Lopez with the Best Post That Everyone Ignored Church and Caboose for Most Intense Village on Village Violence. Way to stay true to the source material guys. You really were Church and Caboose Best reads for a living player goes to Tucker, who was the first to name the entire wolfpack, and for a dead player goes to Tex, who got there even sooner. Best Use of Role goes to Caboose for his creative writing action submission, who would have spooked the soul out of Church…if only she had been a wolf Runner up for for best use of role goes to Simmons for blocking Lopez from giving The Meta Tex's tracking and vigilante shot…though maybe somewhat offset by blocking Donut from seering The Meta Donut for Worst Use of Role ever, of all time, as the seer who never got a single result

We share the spreadsheet documenting night actions, etc, and Church faces a hard-to-swallow revelation:

Caboose:

Mod:

Donut comes in smugly:

Church has some Words for him:

Donut:

(context: we do a whole aWWards Thing each year)

like, one irl year later

Caboose quotes the writeup revealing Church was village, demanding:

Mod:

[insert the exact same writeup]

Caboose:

A few months later, Mod pings Caboose:

[insert the exact same writeup]

One month after that, mod pings Caboose again:

... can you guess what's under the spoiler by now?

To this day, a few times a year we get the itch to promise Caboose the real writeup, and of course we immediately cave to this impulse.

If you've read all of this, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for letting me tell you about this dumb thing me and friends did that fills my heart with so much joy and love for them and for this show I'm so enamoured with. I hope it gave you some joy, too <3

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: night five

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Caboose has a big reveal:

oh fuck. This went so well the last time!

Church:

Caboose:

.......

well.

that happened.

Church:

Mod:

Church:

DONUT REMEMBERS TO SEER SOMEONE (MODS GO WILD). HE EVEN SWITCHES HIS TARGET AT THE LAST MINUTE FROM LOPEZ TO THE META (results from this would out that the meta's player was lying if she claimed a different character to avoid suspicion of being a wolf) (MODS GO SO WILD, WE'RE SO PROUD).

Simmons blocks Donut. (Mods cry. It's like watching Charlie Brown get the football yanked away.)

Sheila kills Caboose: "Sheila turns to her old friend. They’d started together. They formed a block together. They laughed and cried and accidentally worked together to kill Church. Whoops. They had the best of times. While sitting on the grassy knoll watching the sunset, Caboose says to Sheila, “you’re my best friend and I’m so glad we can trust each other.”

Sheila slowly turns her cannons toward Caboose, saying, “things change”. She locks on. The last thing she sees is panic in Caboose’s helmet. She fires. She quickly looks away, not wanting to see the carnage she left behind. She rolls away back toward the wolf den. On to her next explosion".

Donut's night results: N5: You try to leave your tent to see if [The Meta] wanted your help redesigning her wardrobe, but someone stood outside your door all night, glaring at you and preventing you from leaving").

Live Donut reaction (Nk = night kill):

Caboose's night results: N5: You has a deads :(

Sheila's night results: N5: "Firing main cannon." You blow zenge to smithereens

Wyoming's night results: N5: You watch on from the after life, sipping tea and eating crumpets. Could you get more English?

O'Malley's night results: N5: Your anger emanates through your convert. You feel the rush of the hunt again as Sheila zeros in on Caboose and fires off one of her 90mm tungsten shells.

The Meta's night results: N5: You spend the night training, ever vigilant and waiting for someone to interact with you so you can rip them limb-from-limb.

Next: day 6

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: day four part two

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I feel bad that I haven't included anything from Andy's player because she's such a delight but she was busy and posting infrequently so everything was pretty to-the-point-of-the-game. But I do want you to share a giggle with me over this human ray of sunshine getting Andy's role:

What if s19 brings back Andy but he's woke now

Lopez is getting sick and tired of Church's treestump ghost:

Meanwhile, Grif and Simmons opened a PM together last night and immediately started talking to each other more than they post on thread ["Grif and Simmons are funny because no one made you develop that kinda codependency with a coworker" textpost]. They've role revealed to each other (aww). Grif (whose player started watching rvb because of this game :D) explains his ability to Simmons in gif format:

On thread, Grif and Simmons are sticking the fuck together:

And in Grif's PM with with Donut:

awwww

If you're wondering, yes, the Caboose/Church nonsense fight is still raging, but there's also good analysis going on, and Caboose posts:

We're SO back.

Church:

... well, church is dead and can't vote.

Lopez has some fun smugly posting cryptic stuff related to his night results, which he has misinterpreted (Tex's grave having already been disturbed when he went to try to give her ability to O'Malley).

Andy:

Lopez:

Mod getting in her daily dose of trolling:

Tucker:

There's some panicked vote-shuffling in the final minutes of the day, and:

O'Malley:

Tucker:

Donut:

Sheila:

Mod:

Donut:

Me:

Sheila:

Me:

... okay, 2021-me, I forgot about that fake writeup-real writeup pair and it cracked me the fuck up. It's almost like I have the exact same sense of humour as me.

Sheila:

Next: Night 4

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: night one

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Tucker is elected Blue Team Captain ("You are now unseerable and have one yeet avoidance. Once during the game you may take the role of a dead player and assign it to someone on your team."). Lopez is elected Red Team Captain ("You are now unseerable and have one yeet avoidance. Once during the game, you may take the role of a dead player and assign it to someone on your team. For this, you have forfeited your original ability, so you are no longer a blocker."). Simmons receives Lopez's blocking ability.

Lopez objects to his captain ability being ugh, talking to someone and tries bargaining with the mods for killing power.

Donut is too busy daydreaming and forgets to seer someone. (me: "Any action tonight?". Donut the next morning, when it's too late: "Yes, reverse time and seer [Lopez's player] because I thought it would be Night zero 😭")

On his way out, Sarge makes a robot speech unit that will post-restrict someone to only be able to post in robot syntax. "Make it a dying man’s parting shot. Give it to whoever would have the most fun with it."

Wyoming "BRUTALLY MURDERS" Sarge (per Wyoming's player's wording). (absolute tragedy, sarge was one of the players who knew rvb and he's so funny and SUCH plans for items to make. "Bummer. What to do with all this material I had from RvB??? And all the abilities??? I had taint toggle switch to immobilize action overnight. Active camo/church ghost to track someone, and Sheila/caboose love potion. Sad face" WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN)

Simmons blocks Vic.

Wolf's night results: "Wyoming kills Sarge"

Sarge's night results: "You are dead :("

Vic's night results: "Someone stood outside your door all night, glaring at you and preventing you from leaving"

Vic, who was doing jack fucking shit all night: "Oh darn and I had so many plans….."

Next: day 2

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: the end

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Everyone is still stuck on Donut vs Lopez, without a glance at the tank humming nonchalantly between them.

Donut bitches about it in his role PM and mods are unsympathetically amused:

We give the players the option to lock in their vote and end early once everyone has locked in. Sheila and Doc immediately do so on Lopez.

It seems there's no hope for village, until Donut suddenly votes Sheila, and then Lopez also has a sudden change of heart:

Sheilopez divorce saves the day?!?!?!?

Doc:

Lopez "final votes" Sheila, who nitpicks that this does not technically say "locked vote". Lopez returns the pettiness in triplicate, much like the divorce papers were signed:

This puts us at a tie between final-wolf-Sheila and innocent Lopez! We're either ending in a tie - there's hope of Sheila not demolishing everyone! We're just depending on Donut not to fuck it up and move his vote!

Donut:

... ope.

Lopez (3) - Sheila, Doc, Donut Sheila (1) - Lopez

While waiting for the final writeup, Donut decides to start trolling by hinting he was the final wolf:

Sheila plays along:

Donut:

Doc:

Donut:

Doc:

man. this game really was the docnut divorce arc of all time.

Donut:

Sheila:

Donut:

Sheila keeps playing this game with him:

Donut figures out a way to troll the wolf as well by hinting he's a third party who won, robbing the wolves of their win:

Finally, one eon later:

Pause for Sheila to get in her wolfbrag:

youtube

Finally:

Sheila single-handedly steamrolls the rest of Blood Gulch!!!! Wolves win, carried on her massive metal back!!!!!!

and yet

still, somewhere deep within her radically corrupted programming, traces of the original Sheila still watch, heartbroken, ironically powerless to stop herself from using her fearsome power to so easily crush her friends, watching the terror and betrayal in their visors.

...

GOOD GAME, EVERYONE!

Next: post-credits extras

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: night eight

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Sheila kills Grif

Doc protects Donut

Next: the end

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: day seven

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With the three original wolves voted out and village not being willing to seriously talk about conversion (despite the frankly hilarious fact Sheila being converted has been brought up at least twice as a joke), village is totally lost. Doc sums it up in gif form:

Mod 2 gets back to his midday fanfictions:

"You know Lopez? We don't really hang out a lot." "Yeah, I know. I'm okay with that, Tucker." "I mean since we've both been with interspecies chicks, we should be friends. Freaks of a feather and all." "You got pregnant by an alien in a plan to destroy the universe. Shiela and I love each other. That's totally the same thing." "C'mon man, dish the details, how far have you gotten with Sheila? Did you get into her tread skirt yet?" "..." "You get it? You know what I mean Lopez?" "..." "I'm talking about some bow chicka wow wow!" "Why couldn't a roomba have been born?"

I... don't actually know what Mod 2 meant by "why couldn't a roomba have been born". I'm going to take it as Lopez yearning for fatherhood. I really don't understand what goes on in Mod 2's head most of the time.

Sheila is so deep in her post-conversion depression and incredulity that she's getting away with this that she just straight-up takes pity on village and brings up the possibility of a conversion. Church fights her on this:

LOL. yeah. she sure does.

Sheila, like a liar:

People continue to mill around in confusion and get distracted and off-topic to the point of mass modkill threats.

The Meta, now yet another treestump, chimes in ("wolves are the best village sux whooo"):

Lopez translates, completely incorrectly, and no one corrects him:

Donut suddenly starts screaming that Andy needs to die RIGHT NOW:

This isn't how the bomb ability works, and good god, should this player ever know that after how many years he's played.

I'm sure people will take this outburst well.

Andy:

Sheila - NO WEREWOLFING WHILE DRIVING WHAT ARE YOU DOING GIRL:

Lopez:

Suspicion starts getting thrown around at both Donut and Andy. Donut tries to take the heat off himself by revealing his seer ability, but has to admit he hasn't gotten any results from it.

Church:

Donut then has to sheepishly explain his forgot to do it -> forgot to do it -> blocked track record.

Donut and Andy duke it out. Donut:

Andy:

Village is thoroughly distracted by this fight and entirely forgets to worry about "if there were a conversion, who would wolves have chosen to convert?" RIP village.

Wait! Lopez is thinking about it:

Damn shame everyone ignores him.

Tucker is on a camping trip probably stuck in a desert temple somewhere, and therefore completely absent from the thread.

Vote closes.

Donut (2) - Andy, Sheila Andy (3) - Grif, Donut, Lopez Lopez (1) - Doc

(the no teamkills mechanic got turned off once the roster was too small. However - I think more out of habit than anything - the Reds still tried to kill Blues and the Blues still tried to kill Reds. Shakes my head fondly. What freaks. They know the teams are meaningless but they're still ride or die for them.)

Mod:

Just kidding.

Next: night 7

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: night six

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Doc protects Grif

Sheila kills Simmons, but her heart's not in it:

Simmons's night results: N6: You are dead :(

Sheila's night results: N6: Simmons is dead

Next: day 7

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: day six

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O'Malley pops in for one parting post before, presumably, herkbleghing:

Sheila's original programming is still aware of what she's doing and fighting back in whatever small, petty ways her limited autonomy permits her against the things she's being forced to do. She confesses to Caboose's grave (the PM with now-dead Caboose):

Caboose's ghost:

Sheila:

Mod:

Sheila:

Back on thread, Simmons votes for Sheila:

Sheila, who is indeed the least village-y villager:

Simmons:

Sheila:

Simmons:

Oh, poor Simmons. You're more right than you know.

Here, just take this Donut quote without any context:

Obviously, I couldn't resist that bait:

There's a bunch of uneventful solving, general agreement The Meta must die, and in the end...

Reds: The Meta (4) - Tucker, Sheila, Andy, Doc Blues: Andy (1) - Grif Sheila (1) - Simmons Tucker (2) - Lopez, The Meta Doc (1) - Donut

Donut:

Writeup:

Players rather astutely notice that the game is not, in fact, over. Outrage that they haven't found the last wolf yet ensues.

Sheila:

She is SHOCKED I tell you, SHOCKED, that there is still a wolf left.

Lopez, who by now knows Sheila's role is Sheila:

... *nervous laughter*

Sheila:

Lopez:

Next: night 6

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: day five

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Caboose immediately gives the newly-rewritten-to-be-evil Sheila a heart attack in their PM:

Mod, in Sheila's role PM:

Sheila:

On public thread:

Vic, our treestump jester, is still having fun occasionally popping into thread and antagonizing people with Innocent Observations:

Caboose is unamused by this jester:

O'Malley gets on that seeding discord amongst the reds and blues grind. Pages of it. It's really quite impressive. And it can largely be summed up with:

hehehe i love reading this in O'Malley voice

O'Malley also throws out this banger line:

O'Malley also sets up a lot of what we lovingly call "wolf theater", i.e. two wolves absolutely mauling each other on thread to appear unaffiliated, with Sheila. Sheila, genuinely pissed off at being converted, is only too happy to oblige, and they duke it out.

Church has some sort of Freudian slip accidental-single-letter-post situation, and Caboose has questions:

Simmons gets passive-aggressive:

(Sheila's player is known for, in many games begging, people to use any PM abilities they have to PM her and then somehow solving the game and/or causing complete chaos through those PMs)

Sheila:

Meanwhile, back in Sheila and Caboose's PM, Sheila has played it cool and Caboose entirely trusts her despite directly asking if she was converted. He gives her a second heart attack by innocently asking:

Mods in Sheila's role PM:

Sheila:

Sheila, responding to Caboose with big I'VE NEVER EVEN HEARD OF A NIGHT RESULT WHAT'S THAT *sweating* energy:

Overall, village is unified in agreement that The Meta and O'Malley are mighty suspicious, and the rest of the day is comparatively drama-free.

Next: night 5

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: night four

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Because they're down a wolf so early, the wolves unlock the ability to convert one player (change one villager into a wolf. It's a mechanic that's deeply hated by a few players. It was part of the design of this particular game to be unlocked only if wolves are at a disadvantage early). "You have gained one convert. You must use it immediately. You may convert any player."

By (deeply scary for the wolves) coincidence, Grif brings up the possibility of conversions. Sheila responds:

Sheila, in her mod PM:

....

Meanwhile, on thread, Sheila:

Church:

Okay yeah I'll feed Church's hologram "ghost" little colby jack slices until he gets drunk. why not.

Lopez:

Sheila:

Andy:

Sheila:

... uh

No fear.

[Andy the bomb, Sheila the tank, and Lopez getting drunk together, in defiance of science]

One fear.

Lopez, bored to spitefulness, tries to post-restrict someone again (mod reply: "You look for your spare voice box, hoping to find an extra, but unfortunately you were only given the one spare. You’ll have to put up with this canyon full of idiotas hablando el idioma ingles. Ugh.")

Caboose shoots O'Malley

Wolves have been fervently strategizing all the while, and they decide to convert Sheila, redirect Caboose to Tucker, make him kill Tucker, and steal his night result.

Doc protects Tucker. (Go Doc!!!!)

O'Malley's night results: N4: You pop into Caboose’s armour through the commlink and direct him to go kill Tucker. You linger in his mind long enough to make sure you remember what happened instead of him. From his mind's eye, you gather the following: On your (Caboose's) way to O'Malley’s tent, blind rage overcomes you. Unable to think straight, all you remember is that someone is killing your friends and you are going to stop them and YOU. HATE. THEM. You charge them at full force, sending them into a wall their tent was set beside with a speed that could kill even someone in power armour if they hit something vital. The wall gives, but they don’t. When they get back up, you shoot them. This time, you see that a strange effect surrounds their armour, absorbing the damage. As the rage begins to clear and your mind again feels like your own, you realize that the person you tried to kill, now fleeing from you, was Tucker.

Caboose's night results: N4: Even more than usual, your memories of last night are a confusing blur. Some of the fun functions in Tex’s armour, the more deadly ones, are no longer functional.

Doc's night results: "N4: You give some bandaids and aloe vera to [Tucker's player] to keep her safe. They’re pride flag colours, how fun! In the process of giving her a quick med scan (it lit up green for healthy! Or maybe for pregnant! Or maybe for chronic myelogenous leukemia! It’s hard to tell all these shades of green apart. But probably for healthy!), you accidentally activate something in her armour. “PROTECTION MODE ENGAGED.” Huh, okay, works for you!"

Tucker's night results: "N4: While enjoying some much-needed beauty sleep and you-time, someone bursts in. Holy ****! They knock you straight through a wall your tent was set up beside before you have time to process who they are, let alone to draw your sword. Luckily, someone triggered some sort of automatic protection mode in your armour tonight and it momentarily locks upon impact, shielding you from damage. The same thing happens when the assailant then shoots you. Okay, no, you’re not taking your chances with this bull****. You get the hell outta there while you have the chance." [every villain in a ten mile radius deciding to try to kill Tucker as per fucking usual]

Sheila's night results: N4: Your artificial body can’t be killed so easily, but your artificial mind is unfortunately still vulnerable to corruption. Something has gone drastically, drastically… wrong? right? in your programming. You is woof now and will be added to wolf chat with Wyoming, The Meta, and O'Malley. Oh no? Oh yes.

Wolves results: "Sheila is among your number now. She is an AI in a big beautiful 60 ton mechanical body immune to night kills, looking fly and ready to make some sim soldiers die."

Sheila's reaction in wolfchat:

Sheila's reaction in her role PM:

While players wait for the morning writeup, they get a bit silly. Lopez:

Mod:

Donut:

Finally, writeup is posted:

Next: day 5

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: day four

Start reading here!

Church and Tucker and Sheila and Caboose are immediately bickering again. Church isn't going let a little thing like being dead stop him from heckling them.

Tucker isn't going to let it stop him insulting Church, either:

Church:

Sheila:

Church tries to be snippy back but trips and falls into some sincere emotional vulnerability:

Wyoming sees an opportunity to throw some suspicion on poor Lopez:

Grif has a theory!

Vic is still trolling (?or maybe sincerely trying to solve the game? no one knows):

Grif:

(NK meaning "no kill")

Caboose role reveals, and Church correctly realizes that Caboose had mod confirmation of Church being village by the start of day 3:

Caboose is still in denial and refuses to consider why the rest of his action (giving Church nightmares) worked if the action failed:

Wyoming:

Caboose:

........

WERE THEY, CABOOSE? WERE THEY??

Grif points out it doesn't make sense for the action to have caused Church to get "nightmares". Caboose:

Grif picks up on the problem here immediately:

A lot of analysis goes on and players post their lists of reads on each other. Notably, Caboose lists two of the wolves as his two wolf suspects.

Church takes the opportunity to be a hater:

Doc:

Church:

lol.

Caboose:

Church:

Vic and Wyoming come to the conclusion a treestump is basically the same thing as an unkillable innocent child, since you can keep posting on thread as a confirmed villager:

Church and Tucker are back to bickering. Church is being very very confidently wrong.

Meanwhile wolves are engaging in an impressive misinform, misdirect, misinterpret campaign. It's pretty in-the-weeds game stuff so I won't include it, but it does include Wyoming getting drunk:

And O'Malley swearing on our good Christian werewolf server:

The villagers are starting to pull together really well, tho! So proud of them. Simmons is getting shirty with The Meta and Tucker is asking The Meta to comment on Wyoming and O'Malley (people ask this to people they think are wolfing together, so it's crazy deadly accuracy to ask a wolf about all their partners and only their partners). Tucker then follows this up with some cutting smartass-y responses to the wolves and explicitly naming the exact wolfpack. Swish swish stab, bitch.

The Meta:

Wyoming, drunk:

Anyways, with Tucker being So Fucking Back, surely Church and Caboose are done slapfighting?

nvm

Next: day 4 part 2

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: day three part three

Start reading here!

Simmons declines reading the room (confused and horrified silence that anyone would spend time making this thing as a final “gotcha” before dying) to instead bitch about Church not giving him enough credit/blame for killing Church:

What does a guy have to do to get a little CREDIT for MURDER here??

While Simmons has his. Uh. Thing going on, the other players immediately get antsy for the day-close writeup and start heckling mods, which is known to frequently be hazardous to players’ health. Mods threaten accordingly:

Threats stay threats and no players are modkilled. The writeup gets posted.

Frankly, I think they would have been less shaken by a mass modkill.

Sheila:

Church:

Tucker:

Sheila:

Caboose:

Mod:

Church:

Caboose:

The Meta:

Tucker again:

[insert Chucker doomed yaoi explosion meme]

Also Tucker again:

👀

Well.

Yeah being mad at Church for solving any problem by finding a way to die about it is accidentally pretty devastatingly in-character.

Simmons:

PM reaction by Simmons: "But... there's literally no way!" (mod reply: "HOW DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE ? ! ? !" wash gif). In her own notes to herself, Simmons's player persistently refuses to acknowledge the village flip days later, because Simmons isn't going to let a little thing like evidence get in the way of what he, the smartest person in this canyon, knows to be true. "[Church's player] Voted out day 3, ????mods are lying about village stump????"

Mod 2: (“the real one” here meaning in “the real writeup”)

Sheila:

Oh yeah. We did do that. lol

Tucker, seeing hope:

Mod 3:

Mod 2 posts the promised real writeup:

Simmons:

Caboose:

(A bastard game is one in which you cannot trust all the information mods give you. For instance, whether Church was village or a wolf/bodysnatching alien.)

Next: day 3 part 4

#red wwersus blue

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banamine-bananime · 1 month

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the forum werewolf game ever. of all time: day three part two

Start reading here!

Grif, about Lopez in general:

Donut like, awe, don’t worry about him, he’s always a sourpuss! ^_^:

Lopez, begging for them to shut up and leave him alone:

Church throws in a vague protector fakeclaim to round out the lie collection.

Church:

Caboose:

Church:

Vic, sensing a conversation his opinion is distinctly unwanted in:

In the end, Caboose still just wants Church to talk to him:

Church and Simmons are back at it for round 2 of the ultimate hater-off:

This mod announcement fully has nothing to do with anything except a consequence of silliness that was going down in spectatatertot chat but it’s going in here because I love it

Also nothing to do with anything but I love Andy’s player so much:

Oh, uh. Caboose and Church are still duking it out:

Oh! Caboose and Sheila have a Plan!

… Oh, Caboose and Sheila have a Plan 😬

Spanish-robot-voice-modifier!Doc, waiting for the big reveal:

Sheila’s big reveal:

(They’re saying blue team can only take night actions on even nights, while Church is claiming she could do her action on night 3 if she wants, proving it’s fake)

A propos of nothing I love this Donut post:

Like “Hey you, too, can be killed by mob rule for no reason <3 I did it so you can too!! ☺️ you just have to believe in the power of love <3”

Oh and this Simmons post @ Grif when Grif is suspicious about an earlier compliment being sincere (lmao Grif like … You’re making fun of me but I don’t get how)

Apparently this game, too, is Grimmons.

Oh wow, more Grif-Simmons PDA without even an 18-season buildup of getting past So Many Hangups over expressing sincere caring. This feels illegal:

Three guesses who these two each end up opening a private message thread with!

Anyways. Everyone agrees Sheila and Caboose’s “plan” doesn’t really make sense as evidence, but Church needs to die anyways.

5/6 of red team on Church, Lopez only voting elsewhere in case Church really can blow up someone voting for him, and blue team purposefully spreading out their votes to make sure Church dies real good.

(Flashback to D1 Church:)