#random boyfriend dialogue with no relevance whatsoever. yeah? yeah | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-desolated-quill · 6 years

Text

The Magician’s Apprentice - Doctor Who blog

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. If you haven’t seen this episode yet, you may want to before reading this review)

I’ve had a few people sending me conflicting messages about Series 9. And I’m not talking the usual Moffat lovers vs Moffat haters type thing. A couple of people I know who don’t like Moffat actually like this series, and others who do like Moffat apparently don’t like this series at all. It’s weird.

Well, once more into the breach, dear friends. What have we got this time? A grey wasteland, a bi-plane that shoots lasers, and a soldier with both a sci-fi scanner and a bow and arrow. Yep, this can only be Skaro. Specifically the thousand year war between the Kaleds and the Thals. That made me sit bolt upright in my seat. I never thought we’d ever be coming back here. And it’s a pretty strong opening for the most part. The hand mines are pretty creepy and the reveal that the boy is actually a young Davros caused my jaw to drop.

From there however, The Magician’s Apprentice slides very rapidly downhill, headfirst, into a heap of compost. Why can’t Moffat ever just stick to one story and one location? Why does he have to constantly hopscotch to random times and locations in an effort to wrong foot us? It’s not clever or intriguing. it’s just annoying. On a second viewing it soon becomes apparent that the reason we’re jumping around all over the place is to pad the episode out for 45 minutes. Because if you stop and think about it, not a lot actually happens in this episode. It’s just all pointless and mindless prologue. Snake Guy is a prime example. It’s a great visual, but what’s actually the point of him? Couldn’t Davros have sent an email or something? We certainly didn’t need to see Snake Guy roller-skating along three separate planets performing the same scene over and over again.

From there we cut to what feels like a completely different story. All the planes in the sky have frozen in time, and this could have been an interesting premise to an episode in its own right, but it’s all pretty much chucked in the bin. Turns out there was nothing to worry about. It was just the Master sending a message to Clara. Again, utterly pointless.

Notice my total lack of surprise to see the Master alive and kicking after TOTALLY getting killed off last time around (in Moffat’s defence, it’s only painfully obvious if you’re not colourblind and were vaguely paying attention). I was however surprised to see the Master alive and kicking so soon, and now I’m worried that she’s going to become a recurring character like in the Third Doctor era. I really hope not. It was the classic series’ overuse of the Master that caused me to hate the character in the first place. But credit where it’s due, at least they’re showing some restraint this time around. While there’s still some sexist Moffat-y dialogue and mannerisms that ticked me off (like the Master fondling a Dalek’s balls), Michelle Gomez seems to have toned down the crazy this time around, so at least now we have a version of the Master that’s vaguely tolerable. What I’m less keen on is the way Clara interacts with her. While Michelle Gomez and Jenna Coleman do a great job playing off each other, I would have enjoyed it more if it had even a shred of believability. Considering that the Master was ultimately responsible for the death of her boyfriend, would Clara really be willing to trade quips with her?

From there we go back to Olde Worlde times for quite possibly the most cringeworthy part of the episode. The Doctor on a tank playing a guitar. Yes I know Peter Capaldi used to be in a punk rock band, but I’m not supposed to be watching Peter Capaldi. I’m supposed to be watching the Doctor. When are Moffat and co going to realise that this type of humour simply doesn’t work for this kind of Doctor? Matt Smith might get away with something like that, but when it comes to Peter Capaldi’s Doctor, it just feels so utterly wrong. Yes even the darkest Doctors have a light side and the best Doctors are the ones that can switch between dark and light effortlessly, but with Twelve it feels like Moffat is struggling to make anything that isn’t rudeness or brooding seem natural. It’s like watching your dad at a wedding trying to be all hip and cool for da kidz. It’s just painful to sit through. And what’s the reason behind the Doctor’s embarrassing display? Well apparently he thinks he’s going to die? But... why does he think that? He’s got no reason to think that as far as I can see. I mean, no offence, but it’s only Davros. Also, really Moffat? We’re doing the Doctor’s impending death AGAIN?!

And then it’s off to a space station to meet Davros, Except it’s not a space station. It’s Skaro. I legitimately don’t understand the relevance of this twist. Why trick the characters into thinking they’re in space? What’s the point? And why is everyone so shocked that they’re on Skaro. Where the fuck else would Davros be? Nando's? It just feels like a twist for twist’s sake. As does the Master, Clara and the TARDIS getting obliterated. Yeah, obviously the TARDIS can’t be destroyed and Moffat has done the death fake outs so many times now that this cliffhanger has no impact whatsoever. Wrong foot the audience too many times and we won’t trust a single thing you tell us ever again. If Clara and the Master are really dead, I’ll eat my Cuban heels.

Finally we venture back to what the episode should really have been about in the first place. The Doctor and boy Davros. I do like the idea of the Doctor’s refusal to save him maybe contributing to Davros’ poisonous worldview (and possibly even his medical condition) and it would help to fill in some of the blanks in Davros’ back story as well as take the Doctor down an interesting new avenue of character exploration. Unfortunately this all goes out the window when the Doctor suddenly points a gun at Davros Jr and seemingly tries to kill him. Now I do have issues with this, but I’m going to save it for my next review because I want to see where Moffat is going with this. But for the record, I’m very concerned about this (and considering the fucking disrespectful way Moffat treated the Brigadier in Death In Heaven, I think my concern is very much justified).

The Magician’s Apprentice is largely just a gigantic waste of time. There are whole segments of this you could just cut out and it wouldn’t make the slightest bit of difference, and the numerous twists and tangents are completely ineffectual because they’re either pointless or have been done to death. Not exactly a promising start to a two part series opener, is it?

#the magician's apprentice #steven moffat #doctor who #twelfth doctor #peter capaldi #clara oswald #the master #michelle gomez #davros #daleks #bbc #review #spoilers

17 notes · View notes