#probably wasnt the best mental health decision to make OTL...............

[alphalesbian]

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#................................................................................................................................. #so another update on my skin i guess . . . #about a week in and its basically everywhere on my chest and terribly on my back and legs and butt : - ( worst its gotten so far is itchy as #all hell on my side but thankfully so far thats really it....... ive maybe been tired n had a sore ish throat like when i first felt it but #not really anymore.... now its just my skin looking. awful lol everywhere #but....... i found out about this skin thing that looks Exactly The Same As Mine Looks Right Now and that ! was a major relief considering ! #its not a serious skin thing and my symptoms almost entirely align with the process so far ! ! ! #as much as i am still skeptical im just. i dont know that helped a lot i guess. everything else id found n been thinking it could be were #oretty serious things for the most part which honestly raqcking my brain about that for the past week uh #probably wasnt the best mental health decision to make OTL............... #still gonna go up the mountain for some cheap blood work tommorow..... then back to urgent care on wed/thurs to really make sure its nothing #serious which will also immediately improve my headspace regardless so. thats good too #and the help from my best friend . . . . . . . . . i am so so lucky to have him he is literally so special. i was right at the bottom and he #didnt even hesistate . crazy how that can feel so nice and hurt so much at the same time #hurt really from just honestly how immensely empty i was and how much i really needed that support #still though absolutely heated from. the initial situation and how my main support just kinda fucked off in response lmao! but #all that greif and sadness and ugly crying aside today has been a mostly good day in comparison. let alone finding out something it could #absolutely very well be and its Not Super Serious Necessarily and Pretty Common all things considered #is a big plus. . . . a lot to think about and a lot to do as always just really really gotta keep my head on my shoulders . . . . . . . . . #okay and honestly all that aside ladies it looks. so crazy. i really actually maybe am gonna take pictures of this to really document it nd #even if its a serious thing its like. so crazy looking #feels pretty ridiculous dont get me wrong it literally feels like my skin is fucked up where its raised n swollen but the pattern is #idk medically fascinating to me i guess is the best way to say it lol #how would that be for my first selfie in like 4 years teehee 😌 anyways enough of my ranting but in case anyones interested here ya go . . .