#normally I have to picture Ken actively telling me to get up. and I’d think WELL I should get up then. cannot disappoint the beach BF

[mymelodyheart]

Highland Destiny Chapter 11 ~Lock the Door~

Although Joe should have been home hours ago, he had opted to stay in the doctor's mess room. He didn't think he could unwind after the previous night's events, and besides, Gail's shift would be over soon-it was nearly 5 am. 

Wandering through the cafeteria, he was surprised to see Jamie sitting alone and staring into space. He went and bought them both a cup of coffee before approaching him.

"Hey, need some company?"

"Oh! Aye, take a seat." Jamie rubbed his face in rapid motion and sat up and smiled at the sight of coffee. "Thank ye, I was about to get one."

"Out on bail?" Joe knew already he wouldn't stay long in jail.

"Aye. How's Christie?"

"He'll live. That was some punch you threw at Tom. What were you thinking, Jamie?"

"I dinna ken. I saw red, I suppose. The coppers weren't impressed at all," he joked, not feeling guilty about last night's misdemeanour.

There was a moment of silence between the two men as they drank their coffee.

"You need not be here, you know. You should go home and rest. Claire is no longer in danger," Joe said in-between sips of his coffee.

"Ye said she's pregnant. How did that happen?"

Joe looked incredulous. "Seriously, Jamie? You had sex, that's what happened. Don't you guys use any form of protection or birth control? I know she said she couldn't have any babies...but still!"

Jamie ignored his question. "Does she know?"

"I haven't told her yet...she's still unconscious. Anyway, I intended to tell you first because I was unsure of the effects of Ketamine on the fetus. You see, she received quite a high dose. Out there it's often used as a recreational drug, but recently there are a lot of cases of it being used as a date rape drug. Its effect is almost immediate, making it more effective for its sinister use. In the right amount of dosage, it should wear off in an hour, but Claire ingested a substantial amount and to make matters worse, it was mixed in alcohol. It could have been fatal if she had not received medical attention immediately. There is no antidote for its overdoses, but we have given her a drug to counteract the symptoms. So you might find her drugged to her eyeball for a couple of days. As for the fetus, there is no telling...I'm sorry."

"Christ! I thought it would have just been a matter of flushing the drug out of her system...fuck." Jamie slammed his fist on the table, rattling the coffee cups. "So, ye think Christie had some ill intentions towards Claire?" He was about to say rape, but he couldn't bring himself to say the word. Jamie could feel his anger rising again.

"Pure speculations Jamie. But he will remain detained until proven innocent. It is plausible that he put the Ketamine in her drink because we have them here in the hospital, and it is accessible to him. We use them for anaesthetic purposes. Now the thing is, the drug comes in a variety of forms. Pharmaceutical Ketamine is usually liquid. On the street, it is more common to see tablets or white crystalline powder. And Claire ingested the liquid form."

Jamie shut his eyes tight, inhaling deeply through his nostrils. When he finally exhaled, he noticed his hands were clenched tightly. "I'm no sorry now that I punched the daylight outa that prick."

Noticing his anger, Joe quickly changed the subject. "Don't get your hopes up but if the fetus does survive, have you thought what that would mean for you?"

His tactic worked, Jamie's face broke into a grin. "I'm going to be a da. Can ye tell already if it's a boy or girl?" 

Joe coughed, not expecting that reaction. He is now unsure if he made the right choice asking him that question in case there was a disappointment in the end. "No, Jamie...not for another at least 7 weeks. And by the way, I saw on the report that Claire is 5 weeks pregnant...that's around the time when she first arrived here in Inverness. Didn't one of you think of using a condom? It's not just about birth control we're talking about here...there's also sexually transmitted diseases to think about. Oh God, did you have sex on the first day you met? "

"Aye we did," he replied grinning, looking very pleased with himself. "Weel... normally I would have used a condom, it's just that we had a lot to drink and Claire was so beautiful and then..." 

Joe stopped him, not wanting to hear anymore. "You know what? Forget that I asked. I don't want to know what happened before conception!" He rolled his eyes as he let out a frustrated sigh.

"But ye're a doctor. Surely ye hear it all the time..."

He glared at him. "Jamie, for crying out loud! We're talking about Claire here. She's like my sister. I'm not interested in hearing about her or your sexual escapade. Jesus!"

Now it was Jamie's turn to change the subject. "Anyway, can ye picture me being a da?"

"No. Not really."

"What do ye mean, no? If ye think I'm going to leave Claire because of her pregnancy..."

"Jamie, listen. It's not as simple as that. A baby will need a family...a father. Are you ready to have a family of your own? Have you thought about marriage?"

"Aye, of course, I have. Weel, what I mean to say is, I was thinking about it before ye came. And what do ye take me for? Ye think I'll run away because Claire is pregnant?" Jamie looked shocked that Joe would think he would abandon Claire.

"It's not only about what Claire wants Jaime. It's also about what you want. Do you really want this? Baby, Claire and the whole family thing..."

"Joe, I know ye're concerned about yer friend. I want ye to know that I will be doing the right thing for Claire, not because it is the right thing, but because I love her."

"Yeah, that's nice, and all, but both of you have been separated longer than you've been together. Falling in love is not the same as loving someone..."

"You know Joe, once I asked my da how ye knew which was the right woman, weel, he told me when the time came, I'd have no doubt. My da was right. That night when I first laid eyes on her at St. Agnes, I knew she was the one."

"Did you tell Claire how you feel?"

"Aye, but I don't know if she feels the same way. What do ye think? Did she tell ye?"

Joe shifted uncomfortably. "Well Jaime, the only way to find out is to ask her yourself."

..........

Jamie slowly opened the door, careful not to make a noise. He had been explicitly told by Joe that Claire needed a lot of bed rest. So he was surprised to see Claire awake and smiling when he came in. 

"Och, ye're awake..." He had brought her a tray of assorted Danish pastry which he knew she loved and placed them on the table before pulling a chair next to her bed. Before he could sit down, he noticed Claire had an odd look on her face.

He smiled at her as he placed a hand on her cheek. "Are ye alright, Sassenach? How are ye feeling?" 

Claire extended her arms towards him and said dreamily, "Give me a kiss lover boy!"

His eyes widened at the greeting. Finding Claire's response a bit unusual, Jamie hesitantly leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. But before he could raise his head, her strong arms had pulled him down by the neck. She kissed him passionately, her tongue darting daintily to get a taste of him. He responded but pulled away abruptly, thinking she was not herself. "Christ Claire, what are ye doing?"

To his surprise, she unexpectedly sat up and looked at Jamie with twinkling golden eyes and an impish grin. Biting her lower lip, she provocatively looked him over. "Come 'ere Jamie and give me some of your sweet lovin'," Claire slurred. She was staring at him like he was some savoury dish to be devoured.

"Oh, sweet Jesus, Sassenach, ye're still drugged. Ye should lie down!" Jamie tried to gently force her down back to bed, but instead, she threw the covers aside and got onto her knees facing him, her hands reaching for the buckle of his belt. Wearing only a thin hospital gown and the hazy glow of sunlight casting a shadow, he could see the outline of her body and her breasts.  Oh, God!  Disengaging her hands from the front of his jeans, took a mammoth effort. Not because of her strength but more because of his rapidly dwindling self-control. He firmly put her hands away from him and backed away. "Claire, listen to me, ye need to lie down..." he said slowly and deliberate, not quite sure how to deal with the situation.

"I don't need to lie down...I feel good, and you look good. So, come here, love and give me a kiss." She puckered her lips in invitation.

Jamie was beginning to get nervous. "Sassenach, ye're heavily medicated, so ye're not acting yourself. So be a good lass and get under the covers. I'll only come to ye once ye're lying down." he said in an unsteady voice.

She sat back on her heels and pouted prettily, one hand resting on her thigh and the other slowly raising the hem of her gown. "Don't you want me, Jamie love?"  Oh Christ Almighty, of course, I want ye! 

Taking big deep breaths and braving the risk of what could potentially happen if he touched her again, Jamie made another attempt. "Claire, please, ye need rest and all these excitement cannae be good for ye. Well...it's certainly not good for me," he muttered, reaching out to grab her so he can lift her and lay her down. 

Instead of cooperating, Claire dodged Jamie's hands, raised herself on her knees and flung both arms around his neck. "Lock the door..." she whispered huskily into his ears, "...and then kiss me." She ran her tongue on the edge of his ear before biting his earlobe.

His hands having a mind of their own, landed on her round arse, fondling it as Claire rubbed herself against Jamie. "Now, Sassenach, why would I want to lock the door?" he replied hoarsely. He could hear hospital activities happening outside on the corridor, and he was on the verge of committing public indecency. It's been over 3 weeks since they had made love and his restraint is about to snap.

"Because I want to take a peek," she giggled as one hand suddenly grabbed Jamie between his thighs.

Gasping, he seized her wrist away from his growing bulge. "Oh, fuck! Sassenach! For someone who has small hands, ye have some firm grip on ye. And I dinna want ye taking a peek!"

"Why not?! How about I let you see mine first? Then I'll take a peek at yours" she grinned coquettishly, leaning back to take a better look at his face, "After all, fair is fair, right, Jamie?"

He grabbed both her hands and held them behind her back, gripping them in place, making her head tilt to the side. "No, Claire! Naebody is taking a peek at anything..." His words trailed off as his eyes rested on the smooth line of her neck. He could almost see the pulsation of her vein as Claire struggled to set her hands free. On impulse, Jaime kissed the spot, before trailing down to the base of her throat, making her quiver. Then he remembered and backed away. "Christ Sassenach, ye're not making this easy for me are ye?"

She winked as she grinned wickedly, "Well if you won't come here, you can watch me instead. Would you like to watch Jaime?" Her hands were already sliding between her thighs, and he knew anyone can come through the door any minute.

"Fine Sassenach, I'll lock the door and don't ye dare make a sound..." he said, giving her warning look.

Door safely locked, he turned back once more to Claire to find her standing barefoot beside the bed, swaying on her feet. "Go back to bed now!" he growled.  Damn ye woman!  He was amused by how quickly she scrambled under the covers.

Claire settled in, he got into bed with her, lying on his side with his head propped by his elbow. "Jamie..." She was looking expectantly at him, her eyes, although dilated was dark with want. Gone was the giddy, sultry seductress she was moments ago. He knew he wanted to take her there and then, but he couldn't. Not here and not like this even though he was dying inside. Instead...

"Shh Sassenach," he whispered softly as he moved his free hand slowly under the cover and under her gown. There he squeezed the soft, warm flesh before parting her thighs gently. Her golden eyes widened, and her hips began to move, as his forefinger travelled to the moist patch of her panties, tracing the lines of her cleft and her sensitive spot. A faint moan escaped her lips as she closed her eyes in ecstasy, making him dizzy with want. Then he slipped his hand under the waistband, cupping the heat between her legs before dipping his forefinger into her wetness and stroking the silky fold long and slow. She let out a loud gasp as she arched her back, her hand reaching for him to take her.

"I want you inside me..." she whimpered, her breath quickening.

Jamie could see her hard nipples against the thin fabric of her gown, as her chest heaved at every stroke of his finger. "No, Sassenach, I want to watch ye," he murmured as he lightly touched her lips with his, resisting the urge to kiss her thoroughly. He pressed his fingers inside her, thrusting, stroking, dipping and rubbing, her hips lifting to push herself against his hands. She writhed and squirmed with wanton abandonment, her thighs spreading wider apart for deeper penetration. She was so hot and wet, and her throaty moans were making his head swim. He plunged deeper, his thumb grinding the sensitive spot until he felt her clamped around his fingers tightly and her body began to shake uncontrollably. She let out a cry before collapsing next to him, her breaths warm against his neck, and her thighs tightly clamped around his hands. Claire held on to him like that until tiredness took over and her body began to relax.

Claire smiled, drowsily at him as her body eased. "Jamie, I never got to take a peek."

"Sshh sleep now, mo chridhe," he murmured, kissing her on the forehead, before releasing his hands from between her thighs. Then he got up and straightened her gown before pulling the covers to her neck. 

"Jamie?" 

"Aye Sassenach?" He took her hand in his as he watched her eyes began to get heavier, and her head bobbed, as she struggled to stay lucid.

"I love you," she whispered before drifting off to sleep, her hands going limp in his. He smiled a very broad smile. Jamie wanted to hug her but thought better of it. She needed her rest, so he watched her sleep instead, feeling content with the world.

Today's problems can be tomorrow's, he thought.

Then Jaime received a phone text from Finn, the bartender from the Scotch & Rye Pub.

 Jamie, please come ASAP to the bar. I have some footage from our surveillance camera I want you to see.

#melodyheart #highlanddestiny #Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser #outlanderfanfic

[velvyy]

Hey, Rad... Alex... Alexlememe? I know that's the name you used to go by and I know you've kinda disconnected yourself from Viv's fanbase after ZP ended, and I remember your memes and such but I kinda just wanted to get your take on the Hazbin drama since you reblogged the headcanon blog's post on the subject. More or less regarding the issue of her being uncharitable to fans and non-fans alike, plus that one callout post on twitter?

So this is weird. I wasn’t expecting to get asks on the subject since like you said, I’ve generally been disconnected from the fanbase aside from the few reblogs here and there retaining to Hazbin and its more recent developments. But yeah I guess I could give my take on this since I mean.. old fans still follow me. Idk why, but they do!So, really. In regards to that callout post (which is now deleted) I really, really don’t care that much. For one thing, Initially I did because I really hated to see someone be slandered so viciously with inaccurate and uncharitable attacks, but I kinda just stopped because even when I linked the addresses from both Viv, and the Ken dude regarding all the drama mentioned, it was either ignored and resulting in me being called a “pedo sympathizer” or “It wasn’t even an apologyyyyy weh” and like, whatever. I stopped giving a shit.

Terms of the traced animation thing... Lol, ok. I mean homages do exist, and her animation thingy was based on a meme so whatevs.

Anyways,I knew from the very start that the whole “tracing” and “stealing designs” stuff was nonsense since there was an entire like, tumblr drama arc on the issue, and albeit Viv’s post is gone, there’s evidence of legal contracts regarding Jiji and that whole nonsense that was years ago. In regards to her drawing pictures of Blaire White and Shoe… Eh. I mean, yeah, fuck em, but she’s made it clear that she doesn’t support those views anymore, and she wasn’t even really aware of the other things they’d done at that point, and I see no real reason not to believe her because what does lying about that gain her? Yeah her comment on the “blackface” thing if you wanna call it that was dumb as shit, but considering 2016 was a rough year for her in terms of trying to find where she fell in the political sphere, I can relate because I was in the same boat. A lot of sjw cringe comps, shaming feminists, and purposely misgendering transpeople… Not a good time for me either! Course I’ve changed. I went from being a reactionary alt-centrist to an anarchist so. Whether that’s an improvement is up to you.

As for the whole pedo/zoo shit, I really don’t see it. I mean like, look, obviously porn art portraying people fucking feral animals is disgusting right. Not saying it isn’t problematic or anything, but to be fair, she did draw this shit like 8 years ago. I’ve seen worse from even more well-established artists and I don’t see people trying to cancel them? Also, the art was suggestive for one thing and not necessarily 100% porn. I mean it’s still creepy and gross, and I’d understand scolding them if they continued to do so but a lot worse, but I haven’t seen anything like that from Viv past those 2 drawings. As for the pedo shit… The relationship between a 17 year old and a 19 year old is… hardly creepy and reminiscent of pedo shit. So yeah no fuck that. Now with the drawing of Mirage and Kestrel and the tag that said something jokingly like “Mirage and her pedo tendencies” or whatever… Yeah idk, I can’t defend that lmfao. Again, Viv said she disapproves of those drawings and doesn’t care to think about them, but that one piece of artwork definitely had some baggage to it that made me feel uncomfortable after reading the tags.Only issue I took in terms of her addressing that, is that she was very adamant about it being an inside joke… Which if that’s true, you must’ve had some fucked up friends like damn.

I would also like to state that cub art is legitimately disgusting and I am of the belief that it can cause harm depending on the context since I assume the consumption of cub art can reinforce the urge for pedophiles to act on their desires instead of finding healthy coping mechanisms for it through therapy. There have been stories from younger users on the internet that older people have tried to groom them and have the notion of pedos preying on them be normalized by sending them art depicting kids in sexual acts with adults. Of course in isolation cub art isn’t as harmful as the actual act of raping a child, and I would argue that people have their priorities kind of messed up since the illustration being acknowledged should be part of combating pedophiles preying on children. However, people, typically twitter wokescolds tend to focus on the art solely and I don’t know why. There’s a lot of MAPS trying to find their way into LGBT spaces and it’s fucking gross.

Now with Hazbin itself… It’s meh. Initially I watched it with rose-tinted glasses and loved it. After watching it for like… the 3rd, 4th, 5th time? It’s alright. I don’t hate it, but it’s far from perfect. Now ofc I know it’s a pilot but a very lengthy pilot I’ll say. My biggest gripe with the pilot is that the editing is really fucking weird. Like the editing where Angel tells Alastor “I can suck yah dick!” and the scene that followed was really off. It seemed like too many cuts were made in that instance and seemed very cluttered. It also feels that way during Charlie singing “Inside Every Demon is a Rainbow” and how many little animated bits were like almost wiped off the screen by how fast it came by, and ntm there was just so much happening all at once on screen as well. I had to pause at points just to process everything that was happening. The palette is also very, very, verrrry red. There’s so much red going on and like… I get it, it’s in hell. But lemme rest my eyes on something else besides red, please. The palette they use needs to be better diversified, and the same goes for the characters too. Every character seems to have red on them. Whenever Baxter shows up later he’s gonna look really out of place. Some of the jokes were ok, and others seemed non-clever. I didn’t think Angel’s joke about sucking Al’s dick was funny. I did like the joke with Pentious and Angel though. “SON??” Some of it could’ve been written better too.

Regarding the drama with the show itself… Personally I don’t get it. Like, I don’t feel as if Angel is homophobic as a character since his queerness isn’t at the face of the jokes he makes? He just happens to be sex worker which… sex workers are fine? Support sex workers y’all, seriously. There’s also nothing intrinsically wrong with being sexually active either? As long as it’s within reason and you’re being trustworthy.The issue lies in the fact that people viewed the things I just mentioned as negative, and associate it with gay people as said negatively portrayed thing to push the sentiment of “Gay man do sex a lot therefore the gays bad” or that sort of thing. Also there’s a bit where it shows there’s more emotional depth to him and I’m hoping they’ll expand on that later. Honestly though, the criticisms in regards to that have been pretty uncharitable. Same with the criticisms for Vaggie. Apparently Vaggie is racist because… she’s loud and angry? Again, this is a case where people assume those traits are negative, and because it’s assumed to be negative, the negatively portrayed thing pushes the sentiment of “Being a loud fiery woman made, and latina women are that, therefore latina women bad” or some shit.  There are stereotypes that are bad no matter what the context is like sambo-esque caricatures of black people. Then there are tropes that are applied to certain demographics that have the capability to be written well into characters without it being offensive or disrespectful. Vaggie is literally angry because she’s protective of her gf. Like. C’mon.

So, I think that settles what I think about that? It honestly seems like superficial shit to me tbh, and I’m saying this as an sjw-y beta cuck anarchist.

The only REAL gripe I have, is with what the mod from @zpheadcanons posted. Because I know this is probably true as much as it hurts me to say it. Faust def has a history of being pretty petty and bully-like to people she deems undesirable, and Viv harbors it by not criticizing it, and if anyone else within their friend group does it then you’re scolded vehemently and treated like garbage. Her attitude also stretches to harboring an audience full of white knights that I personally don’t approve of.

There’s also this

Faust has hurt distant people I personally know and… yeah. Maybe I’m biased but I can’t vibe with that. Sorry. If you don’t make an effort to criticize abusive behavior within your own friend circles then that makes you just as bad, because then you’re just a bystander to things you could have prevented.

This isn’t to say Viv herself hasn’t dealt with bad faith actors, or people who had the intention to hurt her, or very uncharitable criticism. Particularly from the badwebcomics forums which is honestly 4chan like in how they operate. It’s vicious as hell, and a lot of their criticisms boil down to insults and personal attacks, which serve to be nonconstructive. That’s not to say Viv has been kind to even the more charitable criticism though. I know because when I happened to send an ask to the zoophobia criticism blog (where did it go???) regarding something relatively minor and superficial, she blocked me from her blog. I’m still blocked lmfao. I’m not blocked on twitter though! (not yet anyways). Faust has me blocked there though, and I have no idea why. She’s had me blocked for years even though I haven’t spoken out against her till recently. So, there’s that.

As for her apology itself, I feel like it was fine. I think it could’ve been worded better? The take I disagree with in terms of that is like… If I made a mistake in the past, and I make it clear that I don’t care for what I did, I don’t feel as if me explaining why I felt compelled to do certain things negate me from still not caring for my past actions? That’s just me providing context. That’s a really weird take, but I guess that could be viewed as an excuse idk. Personally I think people are holding the bar super high to a state of irrationality.

*sigh* So yeah there’s that. I miss the old days where honestly I could be ignorant about this, but at the same time I look at my old obsessive posts and I kinda just… cringe. I was such an irrational stan I almost hate myself for it. Fuck XD

Edit: I’d also like to point out that I’m not saying Viv or Faust are totally awful or totally good people, and I know they’re capable of being better. It’s a matter of whether or not they wanna be better.

#vivziepop #hazbin hotel

[patriciaselina]

Nogami Sho’s photoshoot for numan’s  沼落ち5秒前！インタビュー／声優編

The translation of the interview connected to these pictures can be found under the cut!

So what led to you entering this world?

During my summer break in 2nd year middle school, I'd noticed that other people's names were lined up beside the characters' names in the ending credits, and while I had always known that the reality behind that was that "these are the people whose voices appeared in this show," it was then that I saw them in a new light. At that time I had to quit my club activities due to my injuries, and was worried about having a future without anything to work towards, so I was very happy and surprised when I found out about voice acting as a profession.

Please tell us the actors (seiyuu) you respect, and the reasons why you respect them.

Seiyuu:

Yamaguchi Kappei - I'd just become a regular cast member for a year (with him), but just by being there he'd make his surroundings become lively, his presence is really like the sun. He was very approachable even though we were newbies, and I'd always look forward to every time I'd get to see him at work.

Shimono Hiro - I met Shimono-san in the same show I got to costar with Kappei-san in. He's a guy who thinks about his kouhai a lot, and he advised me in many things, from work to private matters. Up to now we still exchange emails sometimes and get along well. Of course he's my esteemed senpai but he's the kind of guy I'd wanna call "aniki" instead of "senpai"...

Fujiwara Takahiro - Ever since my debut, he would take me out to eat during the times when I barely had enough money for transportation expenses, and he'd given me advice after I got reprimanded very bad at work...he'd always been looking out for me, and now I've been thinking that "this is the kind of senpai I want to become." Just like Shimono-san, he's the kind of guy I wanna call "aniki".

Enoki Junya - He debuted the same year as me, but from how nonchalant he is when he's at work, to how he does adlibs during dubbing...no matter where he goes I always see his face in a refreshing smile, but he's actually a guy who's passionate about his work and I think there are a lot of things he has that I don't have, myself...I'll never tell him this to his face, though (lol) And I'm simply just a fan of his Spiderman.

Actors:

TEAM-NACS (Morisaki Hiroyuki, Yasuda Ken, Ooizumi You, Totsugi Shigeyuki, Otoo Takuma) - TEAM-NACS, who met in their theatre research club in college, and up to now are still actively participating in plays as well as various other genres. Their variety shows and stage work saved me from the homesickness and other troubles I went through after first moving to Tokyo. If I could become the catalyst for someone else through my characters, just like NACS had been for me during those times, I would be happy.

Who are the actors (seiyuus) you get along with well?

Kumagai Kentarou-san and Takeuchi Shunsuke-san

Who are the seiyuu/actors who you want to have as a friend?

Ooizumi You-san. He's been involved in a lot of projects as a seiyuu so I'd be happy if I get to record from the microphone beside his someday.

What is your hobby/talent?

Shopping

What do you usually do on your days off?

I go strolling, which is okay even when I don't have much time. Or I'd go gossip about recent events with my favorite clothes shop's staff, while drinking coffee.

What did you eat yesterday?

Curry rice

The thing you want the most right now is?

Self-confidence

Of all the things you've ever gotten up to now, what made you the happiest?

The wallet my father bought me at around the time of my debut. I still use it now.

Your favorite karaoke party trick is?

Kimi no machi made (To your town) by ASIAN KUNG-FU GENERATION

Please tell us your hangups (whether regarding plays or not)

The character's feelings are important. Never forget that.

What have you sunken into (what is your obsession lately)?

Clothes...probably, right? In the beginning I'd scared myself into being aware about it by saying "If I don't present myself properly I'll never become a seiyuu!", but as time passed, bit by bit, I begun to just like it.

Up to now, what's the thing you've worked the hardest on?

The hardest...I can't decide on one, but I think it would be my audition for the agency I'm attached to, where everything started.

Up to now, what are you most useless at?

Normally there are very few things I am not useless at, so I can't think of what should come first; but I have an extremely horrible sense of direction, and recently it took me 40 minutes to go to a studio that's 10 minutes on foot away from the station, and in the end my manager still had to meet me halfway...I'm always very sorry.

my translation index

fun fact: numan comes with its own auto-translation function!!!...and i only realized this function right after i was already finished with this...interesting (hmu whenever, guys, i can help...but at a pric

“ What have you sunken into “ there is supposed to be “so what swamp are you in?” or sth like that, a reference to the interview series’ title!! ,,,but this sounded ok to me so i used that instead

thanks for reading!!! please do not redistribute this translation!

#seiyuu #nogami sho #numan #photoset #my translations #LOOK ok i know it ain't accurate but YOU TRY BEING COHERENT IN THE FACE OF THAT #i tried my very best

[the-master-cylinder]

SUMMARY Dr. Edward Pretorius is a scientist who has developed the Resonator, a machine which allows whoever is within range to see beyond normal perceptible reality. His assistant, Dr. Crawford Tillinghast, activates the machine and soon sees strange creatures in the air. When he is bitten by one of them, he urges Pretorius to turn off the machine. The crazed Pretorius refuses. Crawford panics and flees. When the police arrive, they find Pretorius decapitated. Crawford is subsequently arrested and accused of murder.

Crawford is committed to a psychiatric ward, where he is treated by Dr. Katherine McMichaels. After Crawford gives his account of Pretorius’ death, Katherine orders that Crawford undergo a CT scan, showing that Crawford’s pineal gland is enlarged and growing. Convinced of Crawford’s innocence, Katherine has him released to her custody, and plans on taking him back to Pretorius’ house and the Resonator. They are accompanied by Detective Bubba Brownlee, who investigated Pretorius’ death.

Upon returning to the house, Katherine and Crawford rebuild the Resonator. Crawford reactivates the machine which causes more creatures to appear along with a severely deformed Pretorius. His consciousness having taken control of the creature that devoured his brain, Pretorius tells the trio of a world beyond that is more pleasurable than normal reality. A panicking Crawford shuts off the Resonator, making Pretorius and the creatures vanish.

The next morning, Katherine insists that the Resonator could shed light on the victims of schizophrenia, as well as possible treatments and suggests that they turn the machine back on, but Bubba and Crawford disagree. While Bubba and Crawford are asleep, Katherine gets back up to feel the pleasure from the machine and turns it back on, bringing forth a worried Crawford and the now-almost unrecognizable and mutated Pretorius. Bubba enters the scene as Pretorius grabs Katherine, preparing to eat her mind and take her to the world of beyond. Crawford and Bubba go down into the basement to shut off the power, but encounter a giant worm like monster. Bubba succeeds in shutting off the power, rescuing Crawford and Katherine and sending Pretorius away.

When Bubba decides that they should leave the house, all of a sudden, Pretorius somehow returns and the Resonator turns back on, as all three of them run up into the attic to deactivate it. Katherine and Crawford are attacked by little beelike creatures, and as Bubba pushes them out of the way, he is devoured to the bone. Crawford fights off Pretorius and succeeds in freeing Katherine, but then his enlarged pineal gland pops out of his forehead. Katherine short circuits the machine by spraying it repeatedly with a fire extinguisher.

She then takes Crawford back to the hospital, where she is evaluated for insanity and schizophrenia, since her story was just like Crawford’s. As Katherine is being prepared for shock treatment by a sadistic staff member, Crawford has developed an overwhelming hunger for human brains and kills Katherine’s superior Dr. Bloch. Katherine escapes and drives back to the house with a bomb and a crazed Crawford following her.

Katherine puts the bomb on the Resonator and goes to leave when Crawford attacks her. As he is about to eat her brain, she bites off his pineal gland, reverting him to his senses. However, Crawford is pulled away and has his brain eaten by a completely deformed, mutated Pretorius. Before he can do the same to Katherine, Crawford’s consciousness begins to fight for control within Pretorius, the opposing consciousnesses tearing their shared body apart. Katherine finally escapes through the attic window just as the bomb explodes, killing both Pretorius and Crawford and destroying the resonator.

Landing outside, Katherine breaks her leg and the neighbors gather around her as she suffers a complete mental break, saying “It ATE him!” while bursting out in mad laughter.

Stuart Gordon Behind the Scenes From Beyond

DEVELOPMENT/PRE-PRODUCTION Stuart Gordon, whose 1985 debut Re-Animator, a modernized adaptation H.P. Lovecraft’s short story, was a landmark of excess that made an instant genre icon of its star, Jeffrey Combs. Seeking to duplicate its success. Gordon, alongside Re-Animator producer Brian Yuzna and screenwriter Dennis Paoli. again turned to the Dark Prince of Providence for a more ambitious follow-up feature. But when their plans for Dagon based on the Lovecraft story The Shadow Over Innsmouth – were shot down by Empire Pictures head honcho Charles Band, they turned to a much slighter, though no less strange, Lovecraft tale for their next feature: the 1920 short story From Beyond.

The script, co-written with playwright/screenwriters Dennis Paoli and William J. Norris, Gordon observed, “This was a much more difficult adaptation than RE-ANIMATOR because it was just the setup and we had to come up with the rest of the movie. Lovecraft’s story is only five pages long.”

“I would say Katherine in FROM BEYOND afforded me the greatest opportunity to play a wide range of emotions in the course of 90 minutes. I went from being a repressed Psychiatrist to a yearning, sexually charged and awakened woman to…being a hero! It was quite a journey and one where Jeffrey (Combs) and I almost reversed roles from what we played in RE-ANIMATOR.” – Barbara Crampton

Lovecraft’s “At the Mountains of Madness” inspired Gordon and his screenwriters conception for the film’s monster. Explained Gordon, “We came across a creature, the Shoggoth, which were the slaves of the Old Ones that once populated the earth. The Shoggoth is a kind of protoplasmic ball fifteen feet in diameter, which has the capacity to change itself into anything it needs to be. If they needed arms, they’d just grow arms. Somehow, they also gained intelligence.”

Observed Gordon of Lovecraft’s constantly-evolving Shoggoth, “One trouble with horror movies is that once you see the monster, the movie’s over. This idea allowed us to have the monster changing constantly-just when you think you’ve seen it as bad as it can get, it gets worse.”

After a tentative budget for the film had been fixed, Yuzna contacted New York-based writer Dennis Paoli to come up with a screenplay. That script was heavily revised by the producer and Gordon. Major changes were made in the design of the special effects. Comic strip artist Neal Adams was brought in to work on the storyboards. Adams eventually teamed up with Gordon on the task, eager to capture a unique look for the creatures. The script described them as both shapeless and erotic at the same time. Adams and Gordon worked very loose, without worrying about how the creatures would be made to work. They strove for a striking EC Comics look.

The production hired special effects coordinator Michael Muscal to determine whether effects could be filmed according to the storyboards. Muscal was joined by supervisors John Naulin and Tony Doublin, who worked with Gordon on some of the visual concepts. Gordon decided to avoid opticals as much as possible and create effects live on camera.

According to Shostrom, Dennis Paoli’s screenplay was open concerning how the creatures looked. “Stuart has an artistic background,” he adds, “so he was able to come up with some great storyboards showing what he wanted, like Mr. Bubble (the first-stage Pretorious transformation). He had seen some sketches I’d done for a film a few years back where a person had a large membranous sac attached to his neck, an idea which he liked. He did some illustrations that took it further. So, Stuart had much to do with the final image.”

SPECIAL EFFECTS John Naulin and Tony Doublin started designing the effects for FROM BEYOND. Based in California, Naulin supplied all makeup and mechanical effects. Tony Doublin took charge of the optical and mechanical effects. Naulin got the assignment of the graphic makeup effects. He also designed the pineal gland and the mechanical lamprey eels. John Buechler created the phase one Pretorious effects. Mark Shostrom was brought in for the later Pretorious transformations, known as “Mr. Bubble.” Pretorious, the central character of FROM BEYOND, gradually evolves into a protoplasmic, shapeless entity.

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In Buechler’s key transformation, Pretorious’ head gruesomely splits open and a pair of rotten hands shoot out to grab a terrified Barbara Crampton (dressed in black leather). The movements were entirely mechanical. A small replica of actor Ted Sorel’s torso was sculpted at Buechler’s lab in California, then sent over to Italy, as were most of the effects props.

“The first transformation was done with a bunch of appliances,” said Michael Deak, who assisted Buechler in Italy. “The muscles actually came off his face. Then we switched to a puppet for the split open scene. We had the help of Dave Kindlon and Rob Kurtzman (of Mark Shostrom’s crew), who were coordinating Pretorious arms. Bill (Butler) and I were pumping out a sort of gelatinous slimy stuff.”

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The MTSD crew additionally provided the S & M and splatter material, subsequently removed for the R-rated release: whipping, nipple spiking, tongue piercing, eyeball sucking, and brain eating. Of course, there were basic wounds-cuts, bruises, burns-but also Bubba Brownlee’s (Ken Foree) death scene when he gets eaten by insects. Greg Johnson, along with the rest of the crew, built Bubba’s lower body, while John Criswell sculpted the torso; Anthony and Therese Doublin created the tiny insects.

“Those “insects’ were really millions of polystyrene balls,” explains Doublin, “blown around by a huge fan. Actually, one of the crew kidded me that Stuart wanted tiny eyes painted on each ball. I said fine, get me 500 prisoners,” he laughs.

We also did what could be called the secondary creatures, the non Pretorious related stuff,” Naulin elaborates. “The giant lamprey eel, for example, that sucks off Jeffrey Combs’ hair. Also, the psuedojellyfish and wriggling snake-eels that are present when the Resonator is switched on.

“There was an interesting crossover since part of those effects are optical, created by using rod puppets in a tank of water, matted in to give them the necessary degree of fluidity of motion. Tony Doublin developed the water aspect. John Criswell and I built the snake-eels and jellyfish.

“We used different puppets on set for the biting sequences,” Naulin continues. “There were two of each: one fully mechanically and radio controlled, the other physically operated in part. Those were less sophisticated stunt versions.

“We had a problem coming up with a design that would work with an optical that obviously would not be added until much later,” Naulin observes. “The eels used out of the tank were different because the mechanisms had to be covered up, made to look like innards. For the close-ups, one of the main elements used were latex condoms, which were thin and flexible yet translucent enough for the back-lighting to show through.”

Both FX supervisors consider From Beyond to be a good test of their skills, one they enjoyed. However, an aspect of Italy neither found pleasant was the sub-zero temperatures experienced during shooting as Rome was plunged into a rare, deep snowfall. This aside, Naulin and Doublin praise the Italian crew who provided their backup.

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Mark Shostrom luckily missed the bad weather, but remains frustrated that he could not supervise his creations on set due to his Evil Dead II responsibilities. In his place, he sent animatronics expert David Kindlon and makeup artist/technician Robert Kurtzman. “I was quite distraught that I couldn’t get over to Z monitor what went on,” confesses Shostrom. “But Robert is the best person I know to oversee that kind of situation. He’s an excellent artist. as is David Kindlon. With him troubleshooting the mechanics, I could sleep nights. I’m enormously pleased with the way it turned out on screen.”

Shostrom joined the production during its early inception. “I had lots of discussions with Stuart and showed him my sketches, which were quite surrealistic monsters. But it basically came down to having a design because we suddenly got a green light, so I sculpted a couple of maquetes, small sculptures for the final creature, and the Pretorious monster.

As for the final creature seen in From Beyond, Shostrom tried to go beyond his budget. As he puts it: “We were pretty ambitious there. I told them what it would take. Brian Yuzna said Empire couldn’t afford that. We tried anyway. I sculpted the maquete of the creature, trying to give it a look that was unusual, yet would fit within the story. Creating it really drained my budget, but the key thing was the animatronics designed and built by David Kindlon, who really bit off a lot to chew on that one. He had to make radio-controlled heads and arms all by himself, although his work was essential to the creature’s success.

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“The reason why we all went full steam ahead on this film,” he relates,”was simply because it was such a neat project. That, and the desire to create a really memorable monster, to make it better than it should have been on the given budget.”

The Pretorious creature emerged as the end result: big, complicated, difficult to manage due to its size. “We need several things we hadn’t obsessed with the machine. He shows her what it can do because he cares, but he’s a victim. He is then transformed, his whole life is changed, Crawford is a man who runs away every time there is danger. But he learns to stand his ground. It’s almost a moral message.”

From Beyond was a very difficult movie. I’m kind of schizo about it. It involved a lot of makeup. I counted it up once, it was 30 days in that hideous, bald-headed, dog-dick-out-of-my-forehead thing. I hated it. It was so uncomfortable. And yet on the flip side of that, it was shot out of Rome, Italy, and I got to spend a glorious eight weeks in one of the world’s greatest capitals. It was good. I feel like Charles Dickens: It was the best of times, and it was the worst of times. But I also felt like the role in From Beyond was so polar-opposite to what I had done in Re-Animator, where I played a strong, driving personality that pushed the action forward. Here, I was really—for all intents and purposes—being a victim. Someone standing there going, “No!” So I felt like some of the tools in my kit were being taken away from me. That was a bit frustrating, too. – Jeffrey Combs

From Beyond was shot in Italy with an Italian crew in order to save money. Gordon says that the film would have cost fifteen million dollars to make in the United States, whereas the foreign production enabled him to hold costs to approximately two and a half million dollars. It was shot on a soundstage called Dinocitta just outside Rome. Dinocitta was originally constructed by Dino DeLaurentiis, but was seized by the government for nonpayment of taxes, and then sold to Empire Studios. From Beyond was one of the first films shot at that venue during its period of ownership by Empire.

Dinocitta Studios are located to the south of Rome, a 50-minute drive from the city center. This industrial estate clashes with the surrounding lush countryside. It is here, in studio three-a huge concrete hangar the weird and wonderful reality of From Beyond is being created.

The entire soundstage has been transformed into a large mansion, both interiors and exteriors. The set, created by Giovanni Natalucci and built at a cost of several thousand dollars, it is a large gothic style New England house.

This time around, Yuzna and Gordon have an eight week schedule in which to work their cinematic magic, twice the length they had for ReAnimator, and double the budget: the first Lovecraft adaptation cost $2 million to make; From Beyond’s budget is $4.5 million, primarily because of the enormous amount of special FX required. In this gothic picture, the action starts on page one of the screenplay and doesn’t let up until the explosive climax that promises to be truly stomach-turning.

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“This is a far more ambitious film than Re-Animator,” Yuzna explains. “But we’re under much less pressure because of the time we have. It’s taken an awful lot of organizing, but you’ll see the results on screen.’ Producer Yuzna has nothing but praise for the director. “Stuart has advanced in leaps and bounds-he’s getting terrific. He’s already brilliant as far as I’m concerned. A couple more pictures though, and he’s going to be tremendous. He’s one of the best directors I’ve ever come across who really works with actors. But, Stuart’s greatest gift is he knows how to tell a story. He does it the old way. The oral tradition; fairy tales stories where wild, crazy things happen. And people relate to that. It’s human storytelling.”

CAST/CREW Directed by  Stuart Gordon Produced by  Brian Yuzna Screenplay by Dennis Paoli Story by Brian Yuzna Dennis Paoli Stuart Gordon

Based on “From Beyond” by H. P. Lovecraft

Jeffrey Combs as Dr. Crawford Tillinghast Barbara Crampton as Dr. Katherine McMichaels Ted Sorel as Dr. Edward Pretorius Ken Foree as Bubba Brownlee Carolyn Purdy-Gordon as Dr. Bloch Bunny Summers as Neighborhood Lady Bruce McGuire as Jordan Fields

Makeup Department Bruce Barlow … shop crew Giacinto Bretti  … additional effects makeup: Italy Roberta Cozzo    … assistant makeup artist Gilda De Guilmi  … hair stylist (as Ida De Guilmi) Giancarlo Del Brocco … makeup designer Rita Innocenzi   … hairdresser Mark Shostrom    … special makeup effects Alfredo Tiberi   … assistant makeup artist Bill Forsche … special makeup effects artist (uncredited)

Neal Adams   … conceptual artist

Special Effects by Bruce Barlow … fabrication crew: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries Gabriel Bartalos … fabrication crew: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries (as Gabe Bartalos) John Blake   … effects technician: Mark Shostrom Studio (as John Blake Dutro) John Carl Buechler   … special effects creatures and transformations designer and supervisor: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries (as John Buechler)

William Butler   … location supervisor: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries / special effects makeup

John Criswell    … assistant to Mr. Naulin: More Than Skin Deep Gino Crognale    … modeler: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries Michael Deak … location supervisor: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries / on-set effects supervisor

Mitch Devane … modeler: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries (as Mitch De Vane) Joe Dolinich … fabrication crew: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries Anthony Doublin  … physical and photographic effects supervisor: Doublin EFX Theresa Harding Doublin   … production effects assistant (as Therese Harding Doublin)

Thomas Floutz    … fabrication crew: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries (as Tom Floutz)

Greg Johnson … special effects makeup assistant: More Than Skin Deep Crit Killen  … effects technician David Kindlon    … animatronics: Mark Shostrom Studio Robert Kurtzman  … effects technician: Mark Shostrom Studio Peter Mark   … post-production effects assistant Ralph Miller III … animatronics: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries Michael Muscal   … special effects coordinator

John Naulin  … optical water tank creature creator: More Than Skin Deep / special effects makeup and creatures coordinator: More Than Skin Deep

Shayna Naulin    … special effects makeup assistant: More Than Skin Deep Greg Nicotero    … effects technician: Mark Shostrom Studio (as Gregory Nicotero) Salvatore Passanisi  … special effects assistant: Italy Steve Patino … effects technician: Mark Shostrom Studio Gregor Punchatz  … effects technician: Mark Shostrom Studio Mark Shostrom    … pretorius creatures and body prosthetics designer and supervisor: Mark Shostrom Studio Aaron Sims   … effects technician: Mark Shostrom Studio Giuseppe Tortora … special effects technician: Italy Gino Vagniluca   … special effects technician: Italy John Vulich  … fabrication crew: Mechanical and Makeup Imageries Drex Reed    … special effects crew (uncredited)

Visual Effects by Linda Drake  … optical compositor (as Linda Obalil) David Zen Mansley … designer and creator: resonator (as David ‘Zen’ Mansley) Mark Shostrom    … Pretorious creature effects

CREDITS/REFERENCES/SOURCES/BIBLIOGRAPHY film.avclub Cinefantastique v16n04 Cinefantastique v17n01 Fangoria#56 Fangoria#59 Fangoria#64

From Beyond (1986) Retrospective SUMMARY Dr. Edward Pretorius is a scientist who has developed the Resonator, a machine which allows whoever is within range to see beyond normal perceptible reality.

#80sFilms #80sHORROR #BAND

[davewakeman]

Talking Tickets--1 May 2020--Refunds! Marketing! Seth Godin! And, More!

Hey! 

How is everyone holding up?

I just want to take a second to thank all of you again for being here. If you need anyone to talk with or just to bounce an idea off of, let me know. I’m here for y’all.

Prioritize your mental health and if you don’t want to listen to me, listen to Harry Winks.

If you are enjoying this newsletter, tell your friends and colleagues to sign up by visiting this link.

I’m still dealing with intermittent internet issues that hopefully can be resolved soon so I can do some more webinars and such. I will still be co-hosting the Sports Biz Happy Hour with my buddy, Ken Troupe this afternoon at 5PM EDT. So come share a drink with us and our other hardcore happy hour colleagues. We will be voting on Ken’s new profile picture for Twitter this afternoon!

Get into our Slack group as well. We talk beef, business, and BS.

To the tickets!

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1. We Will Come Out Of This Period: 

There is no doubt that folks will be at venues, cheering, dancing, and connecting sooner rather than later, but we still have a long road back.

What is great is that we continue to see a bunch of efforts from folks all over the world that are working to help educate folks and get people prepared for relaunching the ticket industry.

We Will Overcome was started by my friends, Einar and Martin, from Activity Stream and includes support from folks around the world like  Frederic Auoad, Angela Higgins, Andrew Thomas, Derek Palmer, and too many folks to list in one email.

I’ve been pretty up front about taking care of yourself and reaching out to your community for support throughout this crisis, but as we enter May, I also want to make sure that we all spend time doing some planning and setting ourselves up to be successful when things begin to return to normal.

Trust me, they will. It is just what will the return of events look like and what will the market for folk’s attention look like…that’s what we have to really think about now. And, there are a bunch of really great resources to help you think through this, here are a few:

Eric Fuller is hosting a virtual conference called “Rescue Meet” and he’s launching on May 19th with a 60-75 minute web meeting and he’s asked me to participate along with folks from Live Nation and many other industry leaders.

Ticketing Professionals Conference in Birmingham is hosting many of their speakers and this year’s presentation online now. You can check out their listings and sign up for one, many, or all of them.

The Society of London Theatre has a bunch of webinars and information that they are sharing.

INTIX continues to host weekly lunches on Wednesdays and has a bunch of resources on their dedicated landing page for Covid-19 resources.

IQ is launching a virtual panel series as well with a pretty good lineup built around a lot of music and festival content.

If there is some resource or idea you are looking to learn or find out more about, let me know and I will help you find it. We will recover and we need folks to pull together and work together to get there. 

2. What Will Things Look Like When We Return? 

The truth is, none of us know.

The article above talks about a bunch of venues in the DC area and how they are planning….and, the truth is, no one knows anything right now.

Oli Shawyer wrote about the need to be clear and thoughtful in how we think about what our future selves might look like and his analysis of the current reality is right on. Right now, we think we are going to do one thing and in the future, we are likely to find that our actions are entirely different than what we imagined we would do…or, we may just be ready to do anything besides sit at home.

We have already seen organizations adapt and change to engage with people, entertain them, and stay connected. As a friend at an iconic venue noted to me, “it is amazing how we were able to become a digital content production facility in a week.” After struggling to get the necessary investments in tech prior to the coronavirus.

The only correct answer here is that we don’t know what things will look like when more countries start opening up again and we start seeing social distancing loosen up.

I have talked to a lot of folks about the idea of social distancing within venues and it is pretty unrealistic, difficult, or not entirely financially feasible to do the large scale social distancing that has been talked about in a few places this week. Most of the time, you have to look at the sources and the angle to know if there is some bias in these pieces and some of the ones in sports definitely have the hint of someone trying to drum up demand like Scott Boras does with his notebooks on his clients.

I do think that as you prepare for the return, it is important to think through the entire experience you want to provide from start to finish, how you can better curate your event, and walk through the concerns and questions your guests are going to have.

Repeat: start by understanding the value you want to create for your guests and work from there.

3. Refunds are starting to become a little clearer now: 

MLB teams started announcing their plans for refunds and cancellations this week with the Red Sox, Cubs, and Cardinals leading the way. But it hasn’t been nearly fast enough for the people that have been left in limbo by the fact that games and events have been postponed due to the coronavirus.

And in Europe, Ligue 1 was the first major league to call it quits for the season.

Admittedly, teams and organizations have been slow to announce refund and exchange policies or they have had to adjust them because of the nature of the virus, the shutdown, and the uncertainty.

From my point of view, StubHub got killed for going first and trying to do right by their stakeholders early on when things were so crazy, but the bigger issue for the organizations around the world has been in not communicating with their customers, in many cases, at all.

As an example, I had conversations with folks in several cities over the last week from around the country and these corporate ticket buyers told me that in most cases no one has called to talk with them about what is going on right now with their tickets, with updates, or just to check on them…from my conversations that included teams in most of the major sports. If that is widespread, that’s unconscionable and it will be tough for teams to ever overcome.

You may not know anything, but you need to at least communicate enough with your customers to let them know that you can’t give them an answer yet. Put yourself in your customer’s shoes and imagine how you would feel.

It is this lack of communication and the changing nature of the policies that some organizations have been rolling out that has likely led to these lawsuits being filed this week…

In England, Brighton and Hove Albion announced their plans for next season as a hopeful sign that football will return sooner rather than later…I’m hoping that this season of the Premier League can be completed because if not Spurs will be out of European competition next year and I don’t like that.

The NFL is looking to announce its schedule next week and there is a bit of a conversation around whether or not putting out the schedule and selling tickets is a wise decision.

What do y’all think?

For me, it would be pretty risky for the NFL to start selling tickets…especially understanding what the current environment with refunds looks like, but what do I know? (Shameless plug…I was quoted in SBJ this week.)

Maybe, we can all just buy tickets for our cardboard representations?

4. Marketing, Community, and Connection Will Matter More Than Ever:

This is awesome because I get to write about Seth Godin in my ticket newsletter.

The backstory is that Seth put out a manifesto called Stop Stealing Dreams about 8 years ago and he challenged folks that read his stuff and follow him to find ways to share the content. I’d just bought a new iPad and was testing out GarageBand, so I did the first audio version of the manifesto.

With that, I got my first dose of internet fame! Now, look at me?!

The podcast and the article that introduce the podcast are totally worth the hour, even if you aren’t in the arts.

Seth hits on some ideas that have been at the core of my work in marketing and tickets over the years as well like community and connection.

I was on the internet with Frederic Aouad from Stay 22 on Thursday and we talked about the need to be better at marketing because the world that we will return to is going to be more competitive than ever and the need to give people a clear reason to come visit is going to be more important than ever before.

I’ve been writing and speaking about marketing and strategy for about a decade and what I found was that folks know they need to be better marketers and want to sell more stuff, but the “way we’ve always done things” is a tough competitor to change.

Now, we find that it isn’t possible to go back to the way things have always been done. We are seeing organizations change in a week or less, rethink their value, and brainstorm tons of new solutions…in tickets and everywhere.

The fact is that marketing is magic. That’s where the money is. That’s where the stories are. That’s where you can build relationships with your audience that can take you all over the world and to places you’d never imagine. (I’m speaking for myself here.)

But being good at marketing is tough.

You want a jumping-off point, start here with Rory Sutherland.

But all of us are going to need to sharpen our marketing knives because we are going to need them in the coming months and years. And, just giving into the tactical aspects of marketing isn’t likely to win you the business you need or the support you have to have to be successful.

I could go on all day about marketing and the need to market more effectively, but I won’t today.

5. Here are a few things that I loved or thought were interesting this week that don’t have a common theme:

First, how about that Post Malone fundraising concert where he covered Nirvana songs. I thought it was pretty good. And, he’s raised some serious coin for the WHO.

Every morning I read a newsletter called, “The Daily Coach” from George Raveling. Coach Raveling coached Harold Miner at USC and was instrumental in getting Michael Jordan to sign with Nike. The newsletter on Thursday was all about leadership and the first two points are super important right now.

The Mayor of London announces a fund to support the arts and culture. We need similar things in the States, but I’m not holding out on that one.

Live Nation is being sued for monopolizing ticket sales.  To quote Scott Galloway, it is good to invest in unregulated monopolies. This will be interesting to watch because the government has approved the deals that Live Nation has made and antitrust enforcement as a way to increase competition in the market hasn’t been a priority for a long time. So we will see. I’ll be watching it.

J Cobb shared the video of the world’s worst Old Fashioned and the redemption story that followed. This is fun and maybe that’s what I will drink this afternoon at happy hour.

Mark Pollard is an advertising strategist in NYC and he came up with the idea for a summer camp to help folks focus on their strategy. I’m going to talk with Mark about this and maybe as we work our way out of this shutdown, we can do something similar for marketing and selling tickets. I mean, 100 days for like $30 with 100 new exercises. That’s like the price of a book! 

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What am I up to this week?

You know, teaching fourth grade…poorly.

I’ll be in the home office all week, if you want to chat, let me know. My Internet connection is still a bit iffy due to my blown cable box, but the McGyver move I pulled to get it to work is genius. So I’m holding off on a lot of things that need the technology boost to produce them. 

Please follow and like us:

Talking Tickets–1 May 2020–Refunds! Marketing! Seth Godin! And, More! was originally published on Wakeman Consulting Group

#covid-19 #marketing #refunds #sports business #tickets

[hawkland]

Secrets

Another submission from me for @svucharacterappreciation​ Fin week—this for the prompt “secretive”.

You can read this as either gen Munch & Fin, or pre-slash, as it fits into my Spaces in Between fic series on AO3. It is set in and around the season 3 episode “Counterfeit”.

Secrets

Fin was getting used to the sight of his partner hobbling around the bullpen on crutches. What had been ridiculous and giggle-inducing at first had since become part of the normal everyday workplace scenery—complete with Munch’s foot propped up on his desk and pointed directly in Fin’s face.

“Better be a clean sock,” Fin warned as John sat down—with not inconsiderable, awkward effort—and the foot resumed said position.

“Every morning. Though I can’t wait to take a normal shower again.”

“You and me both.”

As scary as it was to admit, Fin was starting to miss having John out in the field with him. And he still wished John would tell him what had happened, how he had managed to injure that foot in the first place.

His curiosity over Munch’s secretiveness about it was driving him crazy. Usually John would tell Fin everything that was going on in his life, whether Fin wanted to hear all the details or not. So the fact that he refused to reveal the truth over this one particular mishap was mystifying.

“How long you gotta stay in that cast?” Fin asked, for far from the first time. He kept hoping John would slip up in answering and give him some kind of clue to go on.

“Six more weeks.”

“Damn. You must’ve seriously done a number on that foot.”

“Mm,” John answered, noncommittal. He picked up a file from the leaning tower on his desk, and was almost convincing in feigning actual interest in his paperwork.

“Skiing,” Fin wagered.

John looked across at him, eyebrows slowly rising. “Excuse me?”

“You went off for a weekend skiing and that’s how you hurt it.” It was the middle of January and they’d had a fair amount of snow since the beginning of the year. It seemed a logical guess. Did Munch have a secret girlfriend he’d taken skiing on a romantic getaway? He had shown up with a new haircut, too, that first day he’d come in with cast and crutches.

For some reason Fin hoped that wasn’t the case. At least the part regarding the girlfriend. He wasn’t quite sure why. But he actually felt a bit relieved when John answered, “Nope. I haven’t been out on the slopes in years.”

Struck down once more. Fin shook his head. He had his own pile of DD-5s to complete, he should be doing his paperwork too, and yet… “Okay, I got it now. You were rearranging the bookshelves in your apartment. A heavy book fell on your foot.” He remembered John telling him recently how he’d gotten a new software program to organize his personal library—though he was anxious about using the online ISBN database in case the government was monitoring people’s choices in reading materials.

“Imaginative hypothesis, but wrong again.”

“Damn. C’mon, man, why won’t you just tell me what went down?” Fin was close to begging for the truth at this point. “It can’t be that embarrassing, not even if it happened during sex.” Fin hesitated, and remembered that this was Munch he was talking to. “It wasn’t during sex, was it?” he added. If it was, maybe that was something about which he didn’t want to hear.

“No. And trust me, if it was? It wouldn’t be the worst injury I’ve suffered in the boudoir.”

“Well you can save that story for some other time,” Fin replied, intrigued but not sure he wanted to go there in the middle of the workday.

“Perhaps. Though I’m thinking that my days of serious oversharing around this office are behind me. It’s not like my open-book nature has always been welcomed. Or returned in kind.” He added the last with another trademark Munch Expressive Eyebrow Gesture.

Fin sighed and rolled his eyes in response. “Are you still mad I didn’t tell you ’bout my son? Is that what this is all about?”

“I’m not mad, Fin. But I am a little…disappointed. I thought we were closer than that by now. That’s a pretty big secret to keep from your partner after all this time.”

Munch might not be “mad”, but he was definitely hurt. And doing a good job of making Fin feel guilty for it, what with that wounded puppy dog act. “Look, it’s just…me and my son, we’re not exactly on great terms these days.”

“Because of the divorce?”

“That, and a lot of other things. I…it’s…not somethin’ I like to talk about much, you know?” It was hard to admit to yourself you were a failure of a father, let alone admit it to someone else. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. Though, you know, you never asked if I had kids or not.”

John shrugged. “The fault of the childless, I suppose. We’re used to everyone who has children announcing it as soon as possible in any introductory conversation. I suppose I assumed you didn’t have any when you never brought it up on your own.”

“Hmph. Good point.”

“It’s just the one though, right? One kid?”

“Yeah, just one.” Fin paused, thinking of his son for a moment. He realized it was a little odd that he had a photo of his old dog on his desk, whom he still missed terribly after being gone for several years, but not one of his very own son. He played with the pen in his hand, clicking and unclicking the ink cartridge. “His name is Kwasi.”

“Kwasi Tutuola? Has a nice ring to it.”

“I thought so. He tends to prefer Americanizing it to Ken these days. And using his mother’s surname.” More ways to distance himself from me, Fin thought with regret, rejecting the name I chose for him and the name of his father’s family.

They both fell into silence for a while, as the rest of the squadroom buzzed with daytime activity around them. John eventually closed his file, dropped it on his desk, and sat staring at Fin until Fin realized he was under scrutiny. “I fell,” John said once he had Fin’s full attention again.

“What?”

“I fell. On a patch of ice outside my apartment building. I was rushing to get inside with some take-out I’d grabbed on the way home from work. Lost my balance, and like an idiot I worried more about trying to save the food instead of my own ass—or foot, as the case turned out to be. Ended up with a fractured ankle and egg drop soup all over my favorite winter coat.”

Fin could just picture it, and the mental image made it hard to stop himself from laughing. “Not nearly as glamorous as a sky diving accident, huh?”

“Not by a long shot. Though the more you and everyone else tried to guess what elaborate scenario had led to my misfortune, the more I started to enjoy not sharing the true story. Fiction can be much more entertaining than the truth. I could at least live vicariously through your creative imaginations.”

“So how do I know you’re telling me the truth now?” Fin asked.

“Because lying about something so pathetic wouldn’t be worth it. Would it?”

“Probably not.”

John leaned forward—as best as he could with his foot on the desk—and said in a low voice, “You sure you don’t want to hear the sex injury story?”

“NO. Not now. Please.” Fin then added with a sly smile, “Maybe later. If you want I can drive you home, pick up some Chinese, and you can tell me after egg rolls and peanut noodles. If it’s not gonna make me lose my appetite.”

“Depends. You might want to skip the egg rolls. In case they get…bent during transit.”

It only took a second for Fin to put two and two together and then—“Aw man, ouch,” he cringed, instinctively shifting in his seat.

“Sorry, but you set yourself up for that one. But don’t worry, it was only a temporary setback. Everything was fully functional again in no time at all.”

“That’s nice. But why should the state of your dick be any of my concern?”

“I’m assuming this is a conversation I don’t need to be overhearing,” Elliot said, having picked a very inopportune moment to be passing by.

“Keep walking,” John said, grabbing another file.

Fin made a mental note to find a photo of Kwasi to bring in, and show to John tomorrow.

Author’s note: Munch’s sex-related injury is a tiny reference to the Homicide: Life on the Street episode "Red, Red Wine". If you picked it up, then I send a bent balloon salute to you!

#svucharacterappreciation #fin tutuola #john munch #svu #svu fic

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #98

“white trash, get down on your knees.”

have you ever lied to a person of authority? what did you say? i mean, i've lied to my parents. and i don't know, multiple things that don't immediately come to my head. are your eyebrows darker than your hair? yeah. what do you prefer, lasagna or spaghetti and meatballs? spaghetti w/ meatballs. i don't like lasagna because of the cheese. are all your pets micro chipped? no, but they have tags. would you ever cope in a jail? NO. i would be depressed out of my SENSES. have you ever seen an alligator in person? in zoos as well as the wild. when hurricane floyd like ruined everything, the zoo flooded and was essentially destroyed. apparently, an alligator got out, because i saw one in the ditch once shortly after the hurricane. that zoo was never rebuilt. do you live across from a corn field? no, but i once lived across from a tobacco field. welcome to nc. how long have you been tattooed? if you’re not, do you want to get tattooed?  i got my first for my 18th birthday, so a few years. are you a liberal?  not mostly, but i have some liberal traits, ex. i support gay marriage. were you fearless or a coward in the face of the child hunter in "chitty chitty bang bang?" i'm pretty sure he scared me. i don't remember much about the movie. did you ever hit anything while learning to drive?  i literally almost immediately hit a curb lol. jeff foxworthy, bill engvall, ron white, or larry the cable guy? i enjoy them all, but jeff's gotta top the list. have you or a pet ever gotten a tapeworm? no. i would rather die than get one. i am deathly afraid of internal parasites. do you know any furries? yes. i once lived with two of 'em. do you ever worry about your future? (i.e.: college, marriage, kids, etc)  yes. more than anything, i worry about what my job situation is going to be like. do you snore? steal the covers? roll around in your sleep? I STEAL THE FUCK OUT OF COVERS is the lion the best character in "the wizard of oz?"  i actually like the scarecrow. would you immediately look for someone right after you broke up with your bf/gf? no. it just doesn't seem... right. if you became a doctor, would you help your patients kill themselves? no. just. no. do you tell your best friend EVERYTHING? no. do you have someone who you can be your complete self around? only sara and connie. have you ever tried to learn another language? how did it go? i took four years of german, and i got to the point where i was pretty fluent. it's atrophied all to hell though. have you ever shared a house with a significant other? an apartment, yes. do you have a crush on anyone? tell me about them. i'm dating whom i have a crush on. have you ever had something signed by someone famous? what and who? no. i think. does your father have any facial hair? he has a van dyke beard/mustache. have you ever felt like you were making a mistake when dating someone? oh boy, have i. did you continue the relationship or end it when you realized? ended it. do you think you look similar to your siblings? we have some similarities. ex., we all have the same shade of brown hair naturally. have you ever played cards against humanity? did you like it? oh my actual god, one time when i was at colleen's, we did as a family. we all had a couple drinks, so it was funnier than it should've been. closest i have EVER been to peeing myself. however, it's not as funny with subsequent plays, because you know what cards to expect. do you know anyone who’s lived through a natural disaster? yeah, me and many family members and friends. hurricanes are a common occurrence in nc. how many brothers/sisters do you have? two immediate sisters, one half-brother, three half-sisters. are you lactose intolerant? no. would you describe yourself as more punk or pastel?  dude i am the weirdest mix of both lol. how do you feel about tattoos and piercings? explain. they are wonderful ways of expression. i just find some piercings aesthetically pleasing on certain people, while tattoos are how you can easily paint the picture of your life on yourself. list the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel. i've only been to one, and that was alice cooper. it was very fun, despite thunderstorming the whole time. have you ever been on drugs for anxiety, depression, mental illness? i have been since the 6th grade and i still am. do you like green apples?  only if they're crisp. have you ever had a guinea pig for a pet? yes. squeak, harry potter, snickers, and one other whose name i've forgotten... do you shop at hot topic? yes. have you ever studied any new age or occult religions such as wicca?  no, but they intrigue me, especially wicca. would you rather be a boy or girl?  a girl. do you prefer to be around introverted or extroverted people?  introverted. not trying to generalize here, but i find they tend to be more insightful. what do you think makes you a good girlfriend or boyfriend? i'm devoted and loyal as fuck, very loving, and will emotionally support a partner through thick and thin. what do you think makes you a bad girlfriend or boyfriend? one, my anxiety and insecurity. i've also never encountered this situation before, but i honestly feel that i'd get pretty jealous if he ever hung out with another girl platonically, because i'm immensely paranoid. like do not get me wrong, i wouldn't prevent him from doing it, i'd just be very worried. an issue i'm sure a lot of people would have with me is the fact i'm a pretty big prude. has anyone written a song or a piece of poetry about you? yeah. but i can virtually guarantee he used it on other girls. how many drinks does it take for you to become drunk?  i wouldn't know, considering i've never been drunk. i was relatively tipsy after four bottles of very mild alcohol, though. do you admire brutal honesty?  sometimes. other times it is completely unnecessary. what is your party trick? hiding out in the background somewhere, playing with your pet. <-- THIS haha <<< SAME if you had a mental disorder, what would it be? i'm diagnosed with chronic depression, general anxiety & social anxiety, ptsd (which i think i'm recovered from), and i've heard both bipolar ii and borderline personality disorder. do you think the "paranormal activity" movies were scary? no. i actually liked them. do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed? i'm honestly very passive, so aggressive. the last time you drank with someone else or more than one person who was in the worst shape? chelsea always is. she takes two bottles of light alcohol and she's vomiting lol. what would you say is the worst part of high school, period? you're going through it in arguably the biggest time of your life. you are constantly changing and developing and going through so much mentally. you're still figuring out who you want to be. not to mention, you're expected to make huge decisions, all the while still having to ask to go to the bathroom. you have so much responsibility just all of the sudden while your brain is morphing a lot. are you someone who actually likes to babysit children? no. too much responsibility. not to mention they try to get into everything; you can't turn away for two seconds. what is the worst name a friend has ever called you? do you remember? probably just "bitch" or something along the line. no friend has ever called me one to my face, but i can literally guarantee some have. ACTUALLY. to my face, i was called a martyr by my ex's friend after the break-up. and i'm certain he didn't mean it as in "you'd die for your beliefs," he meant it as in "hey you pretend it's the apocalypse to get sympathy."  which is entirely fucking untrue about me. that honestly hurt a lot and it still sticks with me. it honestly made me more uncomfortable to express my feelings. do you find any of your friends’ parents creepy or really mean? i can't stand colleen's mom because she's a grade-a bitch, and her dad makes me uncomfortable, but he's not creepy. what is your least favorite word? i literally abhor the word "cunt." hurts to even type. what turns you on? various, pretty normal stuff. what turns you off? the usual stuff - bad hygiene, bad manners, etc <–Yep. <<<< I agree. <<<<< same. have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist? i've had one since the 6th grade. have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? not a legitimate crush, no. who is your celebrity crush? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) who is your most loyal friend? i honestly feel like connie. we've literally never fought, and she's always been there.

why are you happy, if you even are?

 because i've come so far in my recovery that i have no excuse to complain.

is there a secret you’ve never told your parents?

 yes.

what do you think of when you hear the name mark?

lol you know exactly who i think of.

kristin?

 no one.

zoe?

only the best character from "ssx tricky"

jamie?

 no one.

adam?

alex shepherd's dad from "silent hill: homecoming"

carmen?

the best dancer that was ever at the dance studio i used to go to

do you like fluffy yogurts?

NO. i CANNOT do the texture.

don’t you hate that you have to watch the baby being born in health class?

 i actually never did. but i physically wouldn't have been able to. i would've 100% shielded my eyes.

what’s the earliest memory you have?

walking out into the living room with my stuffed baby bunny and seeing ashley play "medievil" (i'm pretty sure that's how they spelled it). we all used to love that game. we only had the demo disc, though.

do you ever say “fail” when people mess up?

no, but i usually say "gg" lol

how important is it for a significant other to be good with kids?

not all that important considering i don't want any, but simultaneously, i certainly wouldn't tolerate them being mean to kids.

what was the last thing that hurt your feelings? was it warranted or do you think you just took it too personally?

i'd rather just not talk about it, but yeah, it was warranted.

what is your dad’s name?

kenneth, but everyone calls him ken.

does your mother have a sister? if so, what's her name?

 ... wait,

does

she? i don't think so, actually... maybe...

is your favorite color the same as when you were a kid?

 not exactly; my first favorite color was just normal red, now it's maroon.

who last grabbed your ass?

 chelsea lol

have you ever been called a slut/whore?

no, because i am literally the direct opposite. well correction, chelsea, colleen, and alex have playfully, but none of them have ever meant it. we all call each other shit names lol. all in love<3

who is your favorite foreign singer/musician?

 rammstein. they have amazing music and their lyrics are usually pretty cool.

do you ever get mad at people for not having the same opinion as you (ie abortion being wrong/right, meat-eating being wrong/right)?

no. i enjoy people having different opinions.  grow the fuck up and let people think differently.

do you edit any of your pictures? in what ways?

yes. i tend to do general things, like color correction and basic enhancement. sometimes i do more, particularly if it's legitimate photography of mine, in which case i tend to either bump up or desaturate the colors.

who do you know personally that has a nice singing voice?

 colleen

what months were you and your siblings born in?

as far as immediate siblings, april and june, and i was born in february.

do you prefer prince or michael jackson?

jackson. i was never into prince.

do you like spring rolls?

yeah. ruby tuesday's has the best.

when was the last time you painted something?

it's been about a year.

name one favorite thing to do with kids while babysitting.

if they're old enough, i love to teach them how to play games from my childhood. if not, idk. i just in general don't like watching kids.

what kind of things do you post on tumblr?

rhett&link + markiplier stuff, mostly. but i also reblog some funny stuff, plus meerkat pictures.

what band would you stand in line for 24 hours to see?

 none.

name the three biggest things that make up you.

passion, anxiety, dank memage. *finger guns*

what song is your ‘anthem’?

 the song "that's what you get" by paramore reminds me most of myself, particularly the line "i drowned out all my sense with the sound of its beating."

which movie villain do you find the most terrifying?

hmmm. a number. i find christabella laroache from the "silent hill" moving frightening (no, i'm not being biased) because she's like the queen example that religion can drive people insane. the joker is also horrifying for the simple fact he's legitimately insane.

do you think frogs/toads look disgusting?

no, they're cute.

what happens when you strongly disagree with someone?

if i voice my opinion, i get very scared that they'll get angry with me. if i don't, nothing. i just accept their opinion.

have you ever been tested for drugs?

yes, while i was at the er for suicide attempts/being suicidal.

do you own any fish? if so, are the docile or aggressive?

no.

if your lover cheated on you and profusely apologized, would you accept them back into your life?

nope.

are you allergic to any insect bites?

no.

who is your favorite golden girl?

rose!!! (:

what is your favorite commercial of the moment?

it is legitimately always going to be the sexy mr. clean commercial lmao

do you have any famous relatives?

 not relatives, but ancestors. we're related to queen victoria and william clark.

favorite album?

"black rain" by ozzy osbourne. i literally love every song on the album and it was my first voyage into heavy metal.

if your son said he was gay, how would you react?

i would be really really proud of him for trusting me with such a thing!!

would you date someone who played video games all weekend long?

 so long he does his responsibilities, sure. let him do what he enjoys.

what are your top three video games of all time?

"silent hill 2," "amnesia: a machine for pigs," and then probably "silent hill 3."

what's your favorite care bear?

i remember i liked the one with a rainbow on its stomach.

state 8 facts about your body.

i'm 5'5''. just gonna say i'm bigger than i'm supposed to be. i have five piercings. my hair is naturally brown, but dyed red. my eyes are blue. the nail on both of my rings fingers is slightly deformed (my sisters' are, too). i have incredibly tiny toes. i wear glasses.

what was your kinkiest wet dream?

 not a kinky person over here.

what song, no matter where you are or what you are doing, immediately takes you back to high school?

 "all signs point to lauderdale" by a day to remember, DEFINITELY.

do you think you could join the army?

no way. i couldn't anyway because i'm mentally ill/have a suicidal history.

would you date someone who has cheated in their previous relationships?

nope.

do you have soft hands? do you like holding hands?

just about everyone who's ever touched my hands tells me they're soft. and yeah, so long they're not sweaty.

do you think having a sleepover with a guy is theoretically acceptable?

 to me, it really depends on where you're sleeping.

have you ever failed a class?

 only in college.

have you ever cried over a breakup?

 only for over a year.

are you planning on dying your hair any time soon?

hopefully.

do you feel as though you're good at understanding/communicating with animals?

people have called me dr. doolittle since i was a very young kid for a reason lol

where would you like to spend your honeymoon?  

i actually don't have big plans. i'd just love to spend a little while in the mountains of nc.

what's one thing you collected as a child:

stickers. my dresser at the time was legitimately covered.

what fictional animal do you wish was real?

oh my GOD, the fey dragons from wow. they are fucking adorable and so pure.

have you ever been told you’ve punched someone in your sleep?

lol yeah. sorry, jason.

have you ever written a song or poem for someone special?

 a few poems, yeah.

what is your favorite vampire book/movie/show?

 i remember i loved the book "bite me"

do you actually know anyone who is homophobic?

 yes.

did you ever read "the giver"? see the movie?

i read the book and loved it.

what was your first impression of your best friend?

i don't have a *best* friend, but i'll answer for the two closest to me. one, i don't really remember because we were super super young. the other, oh my god it was obvious we hated each other.

what is your profile pic a picture of?

i'mma just answer for like... all of them lol. main tumblr & youtube: link neal (but i'mma change yt to mark when i'm not being lazy); facebook&this blog: me; deviantart: an oc; km rp: mark fischbach; aaand i'm sure i'm forgetting some

have you ever been dumped really harshly?

very. he dumped me over facebook messenger like a coward, considering we'd been dating for 3 1/2 years.

has a tree ever fallen down on your house?

yes, during a hurricane. i was totally knocked out asleep so i didn't even hear it land directly above my head lol. then at our second house, a tree fell on our fuel tank, literally landing directly beside the cap, sooo we're lucky as fuck it didn't blow up.

would you ever get your hips pierced?

no. dermals sound really painful.

what if someone asked you to be in a relationship with them?

 i'm in a relationship right now and am happy that way.

what will your next piercing be?

my nose.

what do you regret doing at FAR too young?

i'd rather just not talk about it.

marvel or dc?

dc, maybe.

what are you most proud of?

how far i've come

what is your favorite otp?

that actually exists, mark&amy. hypothetically, rhett&link

who is your favorite disney villain?

scar, maybe? OH. maleficent, actually.

did you ever watch "phil of the future"?

 not really. i was never a big fan.

are sex and sexual activities something you enjoy?

sexual activities, sure. sex itself, i wouldn't know.

how old were you when you first became sexually active?

 again, mind you, i'm a virgin, but if you're talking about doing anything sexual, probably 16. maaaybe 17, but i'm pretty sure 16.

would you rather have a pet crocodile or a pet octopus?

 i legitimately wanted a caiman for a while because apparently that's legal lol

where is the last place you’d want to be on halloween night?

 not sure

describe your favorite comedy movie?

my favorite's "white chicks" omg

what, in your opinion, is the most disgusting part of the human body?

i've stated before i have some asexual traits, and part of that is found in the fact i find both genitalia legitimately disgusting.

what feelings come over you when you know you’re falling in love?

i smile a lot and get very shy around the person. looots of butterflies.

do you believe in ghosts, spirits, demons?

yes to all.

would you consider yourself creative and how wide would you say your imagination can stretch?

 i honestly believe i'm creative as fuck. it goes pretty damn far.

if you could go into any video game world, what would it be and why?

"world of warcraft." because. like. just take me to azeroth, pls.  god i am such a nerd.

hamburger or hot dog?

 cheeseburgers, usually.

what's something nerdy about you?

 i am legitimately made of nerdy shit

would you cheat on your significant other if it meant sleeping with your celebrity crush?

no, actually. probably surprising considered how obsessed i am with him lol

how old do you want to live to?

maybe like 75? 80? i don't want to get to the point of being old where i'm like pissing myself and need help with literally everything. that would be legitimate torture to me.

are you comfortable with your height?

 sure.

have you ever slept on a couch with someone else, with whom?

yeah, jason.

do you think the legal drinking age should be changed?

 not entirely. i do, however, believe 18-year-olds should be allowed to drink only if accompanied by an adult.

have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?

i have hit rock bottom before.

have you ever been bitten by a snake?

no.

do you like train’s music?

i was a big fan way before they become mainstream thanks to mom.

how’s your relationship between you and your grandparents?

dad's mom is dead, mom's dad is dead, i don't even remember the last time i talked to my dad's dad (but he's suuuuper nice and supportive), and i'm pretty damn sure mom's mom doesn't like me. she's bitched me out before and has said some very rude things to me. i'm not particularly fond of her either, but i try.

has the last person you had sex with ever had sex with someone besides you?

never had sex, but as for the only person i've ever been sex

ual

with, yes.

are both of your blood parents still in your life?

my parents are divorced so i don't really see my dad, but he's still a part of my life.

do you like your best friend’s boy/girlfriend?

colleen's husband is awesome and is quite a bit like myself, but sara's not in a relationship.

have your parents met the person you’re currently interested in?

 yeah.

when you’re interested in someone, do you let them know?

 no.

have you ever had a kinky dream about a celebrity?

 ha ha omg yeah

what are your parents’ middle names?

 marie & john

in your opinion, which is more attractive: nice biceps or washboard abs?

biceps.  really obnoxious abs aren't that appealing to me.

have you ever been hypnotized?

 no. i don't believe in that jazz.

do you have any lockets with pictures inside?

no.

what would you consider to be the worst television channel out there?

 mtv

do you have any siblings you absolutely despise? why?

no.

do you think age matters in friendship?

 no. i have a friend who's 30.

how old do you think you will be when you finally have kids?

i don't want kids. i'm fine with my nieces and nephews.

list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with.

heather (silent hill), tyler is legitimately me (markiplier crew), chase (rhett&link crew)

what’s a popular movie you’ve never seen?

the entirety of "harry potter." and "lord of the rings."

has anyone ever gotten in your face completely bitching you out?

my grandma, yes.

does it annoy you when people use too many emoticons when they’re typing?

it can.

would you ever consider yourself over dramatic?

i can be, honestly.

would you consider yourself more indie or mainstream?

 indie. essentially nothing about me is mainstream.

do you ever use cheats when you play video games?

 no.

has anyone, besides yourself, considered you as a failure?  

most likely.

did you go to pre-k?

 yeah.

have you ever stolen a friend's boyfriend?

not intentionally. then there's the fact we never actually dated.

do you regret it?

 i regret ever being flirty with him, yes.

are you sorry?

 it's only like my biggest regret, so.

who was your first celebrity crush?

probably jesse mccartney lol

would you smoke if it meant getting $30, or do you smoke anyways?

 no.

what school teams or clubs are/were you a part of?

 art honors society, honors society.

do you enjoy going through old pictures?

sometimes. other times, the nostalgia is too much.

is there a band you like with amazing music but a bad vocalist?

i honestly find dave mustaine of megadeth to be an awful singer, but somehow, i feel it adds to his charm??

do you tend to get clingy in relationships?

really, it depends on my mood and how comfortable i am with you. i legitimately demand space early in a relationship, and i romantically bond with people very slowly. once i actually feel attached to you, i can be sometimes. other times, i still need space.

have you ever dated outside of your race?

for less than a day, so you couldn't really call it "dating." he was hispanic.

when was the last time you received a massage?

never had one professionally, but jason and i would give each other a massage if we legitimately felt like we needed one.

would you rather have curvy legs or skinny legs?

not like really big, but curvy.

what do you usually put in your omelets?

cheese and ham. man... now i really want an omelet lol

do you like kiwis?

YAAAAAS

do you want any piercings?

my nose will be next, then more in my ears. i also would like a belly button ring one day, but i'd only get it once i'm much smaller. absolutely no offense intended, but i don't think they look good on bigger people like me.

have you ever flipped off your mother or father?

no, but i said "fuck you" to my mother only a few months ago. that went over well.

have you ever bowled a strike?

probably.

which is worse: stale chips or flat soda?

stale chips. flat soda doesn't bother me too much.

have you ever questioned your sexuality?

not seriously. when i had ocd, added onto my anxiety, i got into this totally random repetitive thought cycle that i secretly bisexual. i am in no way bisexual, but it was a random question and then my mind obsessed over the possibility i was lying to myself.

what did you usually pack for lunch at school?

sandwiches.

favorite nonliving musician?

probably freddie mercury. wonderfully talented man.

biggest learning experience of your life?  

holly hill

what’s your opinion on religion in schools?

i believe all of the more common religions should be electives. i know that's a bit unfair, but if we're being realistic, there's too many religions to fit and get instructors for all of them.

how do you decide whether to accept or not accept a friend request?

i have to know the person and like them to accept them.

do you have an unspeakable past regret?

unspeakable, no.

do you litter?

absolutely not.

do you feed your pets gourmet pet food?

no.

were you miserable in middle school?

 i wouldn't say "miserable," but it was definitely the worst school years. it's when my anxiety and depression started, so.

how many people do you know who identify as transgender?

one that i'm certain of. i have another friend that went through a transgender phase.

what is your preferred painkiller?

 advil

what color was your senior prom dress?

black

do you support transgenders being able to use the opposite restroom?

i promise, you don't want my opinion.

do you support the raising of the minimum wage?

yes. you can't live off of $7.25.

are you courageous?

not really, if i'm being honest.

could you ever forgive your best friend for sleeping with your boyfriend?

nope.

do you live with your biological parents?  

with my mom, yes.

do you have a snapchat?

no.

who is your hero?

mark <3

are you allergic to bees?

i wouldn't know. never been stung.

have you ever had stitches?

yes, in my chin.

did you graduate high school a virgin?

 yeah.

would you ever date out of your own race?

 yes.

can you describe your father in one word?

forgiving<3

what’s your favorite movie trilogy?

"shiloh," maybe

do you play any games on facebook?

 no.

do you have a dog?

 we have three.

do you have a step-parent?

 yes, but i don't call her "mom" or anything.

do you like grasshoppers?

they actually kinda scare me, especially big ones lol

do you like laffy taffy?

yeah!

at concerts, do you buy merch?

only been to one, but i did. i'd like to think i always would.

what color is your underwear?  

i don't wear underwear unless entirely necessary. increases your chances of a yeast infection and they're just uncomfortable.

what’s an interesting fact about the state in which you were born?

 it has an abandoned wizard of oz-themed park.

outside of school, have you ever used a thesaurus?

yes. i use it occasionally for writing.

do either of your parents have any tattoos or piercings?

my mom has her ears pierced.

would you ever stalk a celebrity?  

no. i have respect.

do your parents use social media? if so, which ones?

mom has facebook.

do you believe that there’s good in everybody?

 nope.

person you used to have feelings for shows up at your house, you say:

"get the fuck away from my house" or something like that.

were your parents married when you were born?

yes.

have you ever thought about having sex?

 yeah?

are you available?

 no.

do you live in a big house?

 no.

have you ever flown in a plane?

twice, but the first i don't remember.

do you like mangoes?

 i've actually never had a real mango, but i think i'd like them. i love mango juice.

do you think you’re always right?

 absolutely not. it's a ridiculous thing to think.

what’s your favorite season?

autumn.

best disney song?  

dude let's be real, "be prepared" from tlk was fire

what’s the worst veggie?

 BEANS.

do you like the color yellow?

nooo. it's one of my least favorites.

do you have any old calendars in your room?

i have two meerkat calendars from years ago that are part of my collection.

is it important to you to make a good impression on a bf/gf’s parents?

of course.

are you one of the people who think obama will be assassinated?

well, he obviously wasn't. if anyone's going to get assassinated, it'll be trump.

are you more sympathetic towards animals or humans?

animals, because they have no voice and are never truly do things out of ill intent.

when did your parents stop enforcing curfew?

 i never really had a curfew.

how long does it take you in the shower?

not even 15 minutes. i've never understood how people can take such long showers. do your shit and get out.

ever kissed anyone with a nipple piercing? what about a lip piercing? nose piercing?

 lip piercings, yes.

ever made out in a pool?

maybe, but i don't think so.

are you a virgin?

depends on how you define "virgin." but by my definition, yes.

be honest. have you had any dirty thoughts today?

 well now that you mention it.

have you ever purchased a pregnancy test, for yourself or otherwise?

no.

do you have trouble reading small fonts?

 not usually. depends on what the font is.

are there any old [as in, no longer on television, not necessarily old in terms of years] television shows that you could happily sit through and re-watch the entire series?

"that '70s show"

of all the decisions you have thus far made in your life, which was the best and which was the worst?

best: going to holly hill. worst: letting jason be my everything.

if you were presented with a bowl of fruit with apples, oranges, bananas, and grapes in it - which fruit would you pick to eat?

grapes.

do you have any gay friends?

yes, and i love them.

are you gay yourself?

 no, but i don't discriminate against those who are.

how many brothers do you have?

 one half-brother.

do you like mexican food?

 noooo.

what’s your best friend’s pet’s name(s)?  

colleen: miracle, maxwell, maze. i couldn't even try to name all of sara's lol

do you need to shave?

 no.

do you see yourself married in the next five years?

nope.

are you responsible?

if i'm being honest, no.

ever had a pregnancy scare?

 no. well, because i have anxiety, i was once scared while i was with jason because i missed my period, despite the fact we never had actual sex. safe to say, i wasn't pregnant. it was my anxiety getting to me.

do you partake in gaming?

 if i can, i do. however, my consoles are broken and the psu or graphics card on my gaming laptop is fried, so i haven't in like... six, seven months. it's been torture lol

who has your heart?

 two internet celebrities that don't know i exist lmao

do you have an ex who still talks to you? do they want to be with you again?

 no. tyler tried to, but he finally got that i wanted nothing to do with him.

ever get mad at something that happened years ago?

yep.

don’t you hate when people assume you’re jealous of somebody just because you dislike them?

y e s

do your legs get really itchy after shaving them?

 YES. it's why i have a scar on my shin because i scratched the fuck out of it.

who was the last person you went out to eat with?

 dad, his wife, sisters, and my sister's in-laws.

honestly, if you wanted to get laid right now, could you?  

probably not. i wouldn't want to anyway, since i'm like 95% sure i want to save 'til marriage.

have you ever kissed someone with a tattoo?

 regrettably.

ever had a guy best friend?

yes.

how is your last ex doing?

 i don't know and i don't care.

ever given your ALL to someone?

yes, and it was the wrong fucking choice.

how do you know the majority of the people you know?

 school, the internet

have you ever had pink eye?

no, but my sister has.

do you really care how many friends you or anyone else has on myspace/facebook?

nope.

how many band shirts do you own? which?

including those that don't fit anymore but i have saved, two for ozzy osbourne, two for metallica, otep, disturbed, asking alexandria, hollywood undead, iwrestledabearonce (which i no longer like), marilyn manson, two for alice cooper, and i am 100% positive i've had more. i've had a loooot.

is nutella amazing?

 yaaaas queen

have you ever had anything pierced that you don’t have now?

yes. right side of my nose, left anti-tragus, right tragus, left cartilage. they all closed while i was in the hospital.

would you consider yourself “tough”?

emotionally.

do you have any twins/multiples in your family? are they identical or fraternal?

 i don't think so?

who is the youngest person in your family that you know of?

my nephew, i think.

is your mom a good mom?

she tries her best and does so much for me.

who was your first friend?

brianna. we drifted apart in middle school.

would you consider yourself a shy person?

 waaaay too shy.

are you on good terms with your last ex?

no.

would you rather be a toaster, or a calculator?

... lol wut

do you like beards, and if so, what is the ideal beard length?

no opinion.

did/do you play with barbies?

i did only when nicole wanted to.

what holidays do you decorate for?

halloween, christmas.

have you ever been high?

no. it just doesn't interest me. i don't like my mind being foggy. it's partially why i've never even been drunk.

do you believe in homosexuality?

yes?? it obviously exists, and there's nothing wrong with it??

do you believe in jesus?

yes. it's a historical fact that he existed, it's just a matter of if you believe in the stories of what he did or not.

who was the last person you kissed?

my boyfriend.

do you play minecraft?

i never have and i'm not interested in it.

do you like mozzarella sticks?

noooo. the only cheese i like is american.

do you listen to nickelback?

i have no shame in admitting that i like some of their songs.

do you watch pewdiepie?

i've been a fan since 2013, or maybe 2012. he's a funny guy. he's got a lot of drama around him, but i sincerely think he's entertaining. i've enjoyed watching him develop as a person and comedian.

do you like the water?

no. i literally never drink it unless i'm dehydrated.

do you like eating zebra cakes?

 sure. been a long, long time since i've had one, though.

are there any hobbies you have that you don’t perform in front of others?

 write, draw.

have you ever felt as though you were unrecognizable to yourself?

yep.

when was the last time you took a taxi somewhere?

 never.

what was the most embarrassing thing you’ve had to buy?

 nothing really embarrassing.

have you ever mistaken a person’s gender?

 yeah.

did you stay calm during the whole swine flu scare?

 yes.  i have the immune system of a god.

without the aid of mascara, do you have long eyelashes?

  yes.  my old english teacher literally stopped class once just to point out to the whole class that i had super long eyelashes lol.  i loved her.

is there a kind of music you listen to that helps you release your anger?

 yeah.  tends to be rammstein or metallica.

do any of your close friends have children?

 no.

were you ever rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room?

 no.

when was the last time you were at the hospital, and why?

 in february for a suicide attempt.

"the breakfast club," yay or nay?

 i couldn't get into it.

have you ever had a piercing get infected?

 yes.  second piercing in my right ear lobe.

do you get embarrassed easily?

 just about everything embarrasses me, so.

is anybody in your family a carpenter?

  no, but my dad was.

would you date someone 8 years older than you?

  yeah, but that's like my limit.  i'd have to

really

like someone who was nine years older, but i'm cool with eight.

would you rather date someone older than you or younger?  

older.  at my current age, i wouldn't date someone younger than me.

have you ever dated someone you met online?  

no.

what’s something you have a very strong opinion about?

  abortion, more than anything.  i'm getting more heavily adamant about gay rights.

what gets you emotional?

 recalling past struggles and people, seeing others suffer, people doing good in the world, etc.

do you often try to find common ground when in a political debate?

  ugh.  i just don't like political debates.

do you come across as cold and aloof at times?

 i'm sure.

do you think the last person you kissed is a player?

 no.

if an ex said they hated you, you say?

  good for you.

could you ever be friends with the person who hurt you most in life?

 no.

are you happy with yourself?

  in certain aspects.

would you change yourself for the person you love?

  to some degree.  it depends.

has a guy ever seriously punched you more than once?

 no one's ever punched me, thankfully.

do you think you were ever in love?

 i can say without the slightest doubt in my mind that i was.

have you ever dated your friend’s ex?

 no.

have you done bad things with your parents nearby?  

define "bad things."

have you started a horrible rumor about somebody?

  no, i'm not that low.

why do you believe/not believe in god?

  because it just seems most logical to me.  it just seems... highly, highly unlikely that the fucking stars aligned so perfectly as to make this all possible.  but i perfectly respect people that think the opposite, so long they don't stomp on religion.

do you have any recurring dreams? what are they?

  no.

what is your favorite baked good?

  muffins, maybe.

do you have an addiction to anything?

  i have an addictive personality, so, a number of things.  nothing unhealthy, though.

during thunderstorms, how does your pet react?

 teddy and bentley don't care, cali gets so terrified that she quakes and hides behind the couch.

are you addicted to any energy drinks?

  no.  energy drinks taste like poison to me.

do you like croutons in your salad?  

noooo

when did you meet the last male you texted?

  when i was born.  he's my dad.

have you ever talked to a boyfriend about a previous ex-boyfriend?

 yes.  i was having a ptsd breakdown and needed to know if i could confide in him about some things.

can two living souls become one?  

no.

has a stranger ever yelled at you for your language?

 no, but someone probably should lol.  i recently realized that i say "fuck" waaay too much.  jason's family defiled me.  they swear like sailors and like everyone i know noticed my profanity got worse after dating jason for a while because i was with his family a lot and it rubbed off.

why aren’t you in love with your ex anymore?  

because you don't love the person that almost caused you to kill yourself.

if your best friend “came out”, how would you feel?

 colleen: i would go into legitimate shock since she's for traditional marriage and whatnot.  sara: she's demisexual, so.

ever kissed someone you weren’t in a relationship with?

  no.

have you ever been given a lapdance by an actual stripper?

 ew, no.

what was the last song you listened to?

 "cake and sodomy" by marilyn manson

have you ever been on a ferris wheel that had swinging cages/gondolas? were you in the swinging cage/gondola or too chicken to go on it?

 yeah.  it was at a little festival so it was sketchy as fuck too lol.  i went with jason, who's afraid of heights, so that was interesting.

do you want a small or big wedding?

  small.

are your parents going to buy you a car?

  probably not.  i don't drive, anyway.

who’s your favorite rapper? and your favorite song by this rapper?

 the only rapper i genuinely like is eminem, and i really like "space bound"

how about your favorite band? and your favorite song by this band?

  oh brother...  ozzy osbourne: "trap door," metallica: "whiskey in the jar," otep: uhhh "special pets" or "apex predator," a day to remember: "i'm made of wax, larry, what are you made of?," marilyn manson: "heart-shaped glasses," rammstein: "nebel" or "donaukinder," cradle of filth: probably their cover of "mr. crowley," korn: "here to stay"

do you hate your last name? do you want to get married so you can change it?

 i don't like my last name, but i don't want to get married just so it'll change.

who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend? why did you break up?

 if you're talking about the first guy who ever had the title of "boyfriend," aaron.  we were in the 7th grade and i just didn't like him like that.

do you drink coffee?

  no, it's bitter as fuck and just overall gross.

what outfit makes you feel the most attractive?

  you assume any outfit makes me attractive.

what do you think of people who always wear make-up?

  whatever.

has anyone of the same sex ever hit on you?

  i think so.

are you open to a same-sex relationship and why or why not?

  no, i'm straight.

have you ever wanted to vlog?

 no.  too awkward for that shit.

who was the last person you held hands with?

  ugh.

have you ever told someone to their face that they were ugly?

 what the fuck, no.

have you ever seen a live bat?

  yeah.  they're so cute.

would you ever let your child drop out of high school?

 depends on the reason.

do you pronounce “aunt” like “want” or “ant”?

 "ant"

would you ever let a girl/boy put you through hell and back?

  never again.

have you watched porn alone before?

 i don't watch porn to begin with.

what do you think about weed?

 i think it smells fucking awful more than anything.

recommend a book:

 i recommend "johnny got his gun" by dalton trumbo more than any book on the face of the planet.  the writing style is very unique and a bit hard to understand sometimes, but the meaning behind it.  it increased my pacifism by a mile.

do you like to cook? or do you always prefer take out?

  i can't cook.  i literally burned a hot dog to where it split in half in the microwave.

are pets allowed to be on the furniture in your house?

  yes.  they live here.

declawing cats: for or against?

 against

what theory (serious or not) has always intrigued you?

  if the moon landing was fake or not.  i believe it was real, but there is some seriously compelling evidence that it was a studio trick.  i'd highly recommend reading about it.

do you consider yourself a perfectionist?

  about some things.

#survey #quiz #questions #asks #answered