#nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh im want to tearing my fuckiggn hair out ive had ENOUGH

[hella1975]

i just think. andrew's possessive and mean and does horrible damage to people he ought to consider friends and he's physically violent to the point of literal GBH charges and he carries knives and you dont know his boundaries you just know if you cross them even accidentally he WILL gut you and. he's the most selfless person on the team and he willingly resigns himself to a hellish existence if it means his brother stays out of it his brother who he doesnt even know and hasnt met a single time in his life doesnt even know he EXISTED until suddenly he does and he puts his brother's livelihood over his simply because there's a chance he might drag him down and he isn't going to risk it and he kills his brother's abuser without question knowing full well he'll be hated for it and he doesn't mind it because in his head it was the only possible response he could have given and he gets his brother off drugs and again with his teammate who he owes nothing to and he doesn't know how to love and he's clumsy and far too sharp with it but. if he decides someone is his it's common knowledge to leave them the fuck alone because he just grabs onto the few people he can tolerate and he doesnt let go doesnt know how to let go holds on so tight he leaves claw marks his devotion is a violent, bloody thing with teeth and he doesnt know how to be gentle and he doesnt want to be gentle and. he likes sweet things and he tears his food up like a child and he's vicious in his teasing and he loves his eccentric therapist and he buys her little ornaments and he argues on apocalypse survival strategies with the teammate deemed too nice for him and. he has an eidetic memory and is wickedly observant to the point he predicts certain teammates better than even their closest friends can and he exists in the narrative as this indomitable boy of iron who is strong enough to carry neil's trauma and stand firm against it and he is he is he is but once he was seven. he was seven and he believed him. he said please enough to hate the word. no one was strong for him. no one saved him. they call him monster even now

#what if - and i mean this genuinely - i went to sleep and never woke up. what if i went gentle into that goodnight. what if i killed everyon #none of you bitches are even close to understanding andrew like i do im in his stupid fucking head i cant GET OUT #nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh im want to tearing my fuckiggn hair out ive had ENOUGH #andrew minyard #aftg #hella reads aftg