#my iasip fight club fic

[royjamierot]

no one can understand my vision. just imagine this: mac charlie and dennis are all so repressed. just think about the way the younger versions of themselves (and even dennis still) might have used violence as a means of expressing any emotion. think about the way mac is so repressed in his sexuality that he'd rather be violent with his friends than touch another man gently. think about the way charlie is so traumatized that the only touch he knows is violent and unwanted, and that's the only thing he knows how to give. think about the way dennis is so out of touch with his emotions besides anger that violence feels like the only outlet to show any strong feeling. think about the way these three men would let each other be gentle with one another under the guise of fighting. think about them wiping blood off of each other's faces, or holding one another up after a punch to the gut. think about how they grow out of this with time and just take care of each other but only after so long of hurting each other like everyone else in their lives hurt them. do you guys understand do you see what im trying to say.

#like ofc this doesn't fit into canon or whatever i just had an idea that ive been insane about these past three days #and i NEED people to care and understand the insanity i need people to understand my thoughts #charmacden #iasip #always sunny #mine #my iasip fight club fic

[royjamierot]

I couldn’t be more interested in ur fight club/sunny thoughts if u have any more please share

okay so in my original post i didn't exactly share a lot about the "club" aspect of it mainly because i mean this to be more of a thing between the three guys, but i think there is a way to incorporate the club part of it. i think that maybe they feel this sort of ritual between them is sacred, and when one of them (maybe dennis?) starts doing it with someone else it loses something, or feels different.

i think it feels akin to cheating for them,, like i genuinely think this is the closest thing any of them had had to a real relationship at this point (this takes place during s2 in my head). i think that they beat the shit out of each other just so they can feel each other's hands on one another without it being gay. that way at the end of it mac can cup charlies face and wipe blood off of it, or charlie can run his hands through dennis' hair and fix it so he looks presentable again. they are so deprived of touch and so desperate for one another that it comes out in the only way they know how: violence. they can allow themselves to be gentle after the fact, almost like it's aftercare, but it's not gay because they're just helping a friend out after a fight. even though their touch is so much more tender than friends would ever be in this situation. it's all light touches and shaky hands and bruises and blood, and it pulls them closer each week. this ritual they engage in makes them so vulnerable to each other, and it feels so freeing for them. they can let go of most of their repression while keeping the one thing that matters most to them at that point, the sanctity of their "straight" identity. i think it really drives home how bad their relationship with their emotions are, because they all are because they'd rather be hurt over and over again just to feel a little bit of gentle touch than admit that's something they want. i think there are blood stains on the bar basement floor and i think there are scars on their bodies and they're all from good memories because regardless how much they hurt each other each one of them knows separately that the person who gave them the scars loves them. the all know the fighting is more than just an excuse to get emotions out, but no one says anything for a while, because it might break the tentative security they've set up with each other, and it might ruin the nicest thing any of them have ever had.

(im aware that this is not really the metaphor in fight club but in my head fight club is a metaphor for gay sex)

#IM SO SICK ABOUT THIS IDEA #i genuinely cant tell if what im saying makes sense or in cohesive at all #BUT THANK YOU ANON I LOVE RAMBLING ABOUT THIS THOUGHT #i hope someone understands how compelling it is to me #mine #iasip #always sunny #charmacden #my iasip fight club fic #asks

[royjamierot]

the day i finally get my charmacden fic published it's over for yall

#literally no one will care or read it but IT'S OVER FOR Y'ALL #mine #my iasip fight club fic

[royjamierot]

Ok but when are you posting the iasip fight club fic cause I've seen you mention it before it hasn't left my head since

i have one chapter up here and im hoping to continue to work on it but it is... slow going (i haven't touched it since i uploaded the first chapter) but i promise i love this fic and i do wanna finish it eventually because I'm insane but... yeah.

#mine #fics #asks

[royjamierot]

shout out to my fight club inspired iasip fic i started writing before ted lasso took my life and eventually got steamrolled. i love that fic. i published one chapter and I still think about it all the time but if i ever finish it I'll be surprised...... even though i want to finish it I'll be surprised if it gets finished

#the thing is i just thrive on attention and there's less people reading charmacden fics yk #mine