#meanwhile Dick loses his mind because his brother's virtue is at risk ffffffffffff

[002yb]

That one reddit post where the guy moves into a new apartment building but hasn't met his neighbors ft. sladejay.

The nice thing about having brothers is that they're obligated to help you move into your new apartment. Not so nice is having to listen to said brothers' opinions on the legitimacy of the building because it's clearly a front for something nefarious and not up to code and did Jason even vet the place before signing his lease?

"Desperate times, desperate measures." Jason says, using his elbow to hit the button for the lift. Suspect as it is, the start and stop ride gets the adrenaline pumping; it hasn't failed them yet, so the place isn't too bad.

"Because you were so hard pressed living comfortably at home with no expenses and no expectations." Tim quips back at him, deadpan. The sarcasm and sass is hardly appreciated, though Jason likes to imagine it's just Tim's way of lashing out at Jason for leaving him at the manor to fend for himself.

"It's called independence, Timothy." Jason says, raising his shoulder in a lackadaisical shrug as he teases, "You'll understand when you're older."

"Nothing says 'independence' like Bruce paying your rent." Tim intones, unbothered by the wicked read until Jason hip checks him in retaliation and he stumbles into a wall. When Tim threatens to drop Jason's shit, Jason dares him. Jason will drop him, the punkass.

If only because Dick would usually have intervened in their shenanigans by now, Jason looks over his shoulder at him. Tim follows suit and they both frown as Dick stares at the elevator, jaw set.

"You good, big bird?" Jason asks, wandering back to Dick's side. When Dick continues to space out, Jason knocks their shoulders and tilts his head to better catch Dick's gaze.

With Dick's attention on him, that quiet intensity from before softens some, but there's still trepidation. It makes Jason purse his lips, sulking, "Hey, you're the one that supported this."

Dick grimaces, caught out, "I do support you, just—does it have to be here?"

Jason's sulk devolves into a pout. He argues, "Your first apartment wasn't much better."

Before Tim can interject with commentary on how Dick didn't have daddy dearest paving the way for his independence, Jason turns on him with a warning scowl, trying and failing to not be endeared as Tim cackles under his breath. Jason flips him off, pointedly turning back to Dick who, frankly, looks antsy as fuck.

"Stay with me instead." Dick bargains. "You can take the spare room until another unit opens up."

"Hard pass."

On cue, the elevator chimes and the doors screech open jerkily. Only while Tim shuffles his way inside, Dick stays resolutely in place. He shoots Jason a look that's equal parts pained and pleading. "Then take my place. I'll stay here."

"For fuck's sake, it's not that bad." Jason groans, bumping the boxes he holds against the ones Dick has in hand and corralling him back into the elevator. "You're being dramatic."

Tim scoffs and Jason sneers at him, backing and squishing his brother into a corner and keeping him there with his bulk.

Bickering and bantering as they all are, they don't notice the hand that catches the door before the lift can close, only how it pushes the door open and how they all look up and oh. Hot damn.

The moment Jason's jaw drops, Dick smacks it back closed with an aggrieved and impatient huff. Like hell Dick's temperament could be of any consequence to Jason at the moment though because an actual beefcake terminator saunters onto the lift and fuck, Jason can't stop staring. If this is his neighbor, he definitely moved to the right place. Fuck what anyone else thinks.

Just as Jason is appreciating the man's imposing stature, he hears a gruff, "Sit down."

The order sends a trill up Jason's spine like a live wire and without thinking, like the fool he is, Jason sits.

It's only as he kneels on the floor, eyes still caught on broad shoulders and strong arms that he only wishes would throw him around, that he sees the dog at the man's heel. Because the man was talking to his dog. Not Jason.

Oh.

As the elevator starts moving up through the floors, jarring in its sudden fits of movement, Jason jerkily raises his head to make eye contact with his neighbor, a pretty blush burning hot across Jason's face.

His neighbor looks after him in turn, amused and appraising before he smirks and oh, it's sinful. A low chuckle escapes the man, drawing another shiver up Jason's spine. While he pats his dog's head, his eyes don't move from Jason when he says, "Good boy."

Fuck. That's—oh.

To be so humiliated and turned on—fuck this old man. And by that Jason means let the old man fuck him. Please and thanks.

Before Jason can make the suggestion, the man's gaze shifts to Dick and he teases, taunts, "He one of yours, Grayson?"

What.

Betrayal is Jason's first petulant thought, followed by a more reasonable sense of dread because this man isn't Dick's type, but Dick knows he's Jason's [type] and—

No, no no. This is why you never have brothers help you move into your new place; to be blue balled after Jason has had arguably the most cringe of meet-cutes, too!

But Jason can see from the set of Dick's shoulders and the tilt of his chin that this potential romance is dead in the water. For whatever reason, Dick is intent on that. Unfortunately for him, Jason has never been the best at minding him. In fact, Jason will throttle him for this, the killjoy.

"He's my brother." Dick says, terse. "Don't fuck with him, Slade."

Slade's gaze sweeps over Jason, a fleeting once over that leaves heat trailing in its wake. There's a sharp nudge to his lower back—Tim, reminding Jason that he's still sat on the floor like an idiot; so embarrassing.

"That's asking a lot of a man." Slade drawls. He looks to Dick with a crooked and biting grin, so charming that Jason might swoon a bit. "What would I get out of this?"

Dick's expression shifts into something so damn petulant that Slade laughs again, pleasantly low and husky. It's such a nice sound that Jason can't even be bothered by the fact that he's missing some sort of crucial detail to explain the tension going on.

Dick and Slade know each other, somehow. And Slade irritates Dick in a way that Jason never knew was possible, too.

When Slade tilts his head to the side, the large dog at his side springs forward, tail wagging happily as it jumps up to rest its large paws on the boxes Dick holds—licking at Dick's cheek like he's seeing an old friend again. It undermines Dick's authority considerably and Jason marvels the exchange.

The lift door opens and Slade turns back to Jason. Appraising him before he smirks, "Welcome to the building, boy."

=====

And then they all get out together and realize that Slade really is Jason's neighbor and reactions are mixed ahahaha.

#batfam #batbros #sladejay #whatever this au is—i like to think everyone assumes Slade and dick are old flames but in truth the only pursuit going on is Slade wanting #Dick to work for him because Dick's talents are wasted in the public sector lolol #Slade's in a good position with natural sub Jason and his relations to Dick #basically Slade will have his cake and eat it too because Jason is a treat who has a lot of pull on Dick because the brocon trope is #funny af idc but yes shenanigans #where Jason tries to seduce his neighbor but he's a maiden out of his depth so whenever Slade reciprocates Jason blue screens #meanwhile Dick loses his mind because his brother's virtue is at risk ffffffffffff #something something Slade and Dick having similar interests so Dick can only imagine the 'dangers' his brother is in #meanwhile Jason is 👀👀👀👀 #words