#like underneath all the insecurities and sadness and worry of being 26 almost 27

[itspileofgoodthings]

the thing is—-it doesn’t feel impossible. It feels increasingly plausible.

#meeting someone I mean #meeting my husband #part of me knows he’s out there #and that I’ll meet him when it’s right #God’s plan! #i can almost feel it though. not in terms of specifics or getting overly attached to some imaginary version #but I know and believe and trust that it could happen #(a confusingly worded sentence) #like underneath all the insecurities and sadness and worry of being 26 almost 27 #i know I am a lot of a woman (positive) #i know I am interesting and layered and complex and funny #and it’s just most men won’t want that #but it feels very likely that one WILL #that there is someone out there who will be delighted by my intensity and inability to shut up about myself #and impressed by my brain and protective of my heart #and in need of me and my love #the older I get the more likely it feels tbh #like. it’s a mark of reality #of course I don’t know the future and can’t predict it #it’s all in God’s hands and I am glad about that but I guess what I’m saying is that I trust that intuition and I see no reason to not #cynicism about romance is of course tempting but it’s also very stupid #and fundamentally contrary to how reality and love both work #the more specific I am. the more I live my life with my whole heart and try to do my best #my many failings and meltdowns aside #the closer I know I am to finding what is meant for me #which. i guess could NOT be a husband. but I feel like it is #it’s fine either way! because God knows what I need #but yeah #anyway I am glad replies are turned off #my musings about my (not real) romantic journeys always prompts a lot of discussion