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penny00dreadful · 4 months

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Okay, okay, okay listen.

Remember when we were all obsessed with Steddie Legally Blonde a while back? Yes, I’m still thinking about it, leave me alone. And I adore everything I’ve read. It’s all so fantastic.

But I had a thought because what if we switched it up a little? I’m going mainly off of the musical here, so bear with.

So what if instead of having Steddie as Elle and Emmett, we instead have them as Paulette and UPS Guy/Kyle??? Like??? It fits, right???

But then, but THEN who do we have as Elle/Emmett?

Buckingham.

No, but just think of it!

Or I guess you don’t really need to because I’ve thought of it enough for all of us and it goes like this:

(OMG you guys I blacked out and when I woke up this thing was 3.1k long written over a few hours. I haven't edited this at all so please be gentle about typos/tense changes etc. The fever just took me.)

Chrissy is your quintessential girly girl. She is Elle Woods. She’s blonde, pretty, cheerleader, very feminine and happy where she is in life, President of her Sorority with her besties by her side and her guy who is… well he’s as good as any guy could be, right?

Jason is handsome, rich, well connected, he treats her with affection and he humours her when she has some pretty wild, out there ideas.

But then it happens and they break up because apparently having a girly girl for a wife just wouldn’t look good if he’s gonna live his life the way he wants to. Lawyer, his own practice, running for office.

Apparently her blonde hair and boobs would hold him back which, what the fuck???

What does that have to do with anything?

They love each other, right? That surface stuff isn’t supposed to matter. At all! They’re supposed to be together no matter what because they… they love each other?

Well fuck that noise, no one tells Chrissy Cunningham she’s too fucking blonde to do anything which is a hypocritical ass thing to say because has Jason looked in the fucking mirror recently?

Different fucking rules, apaprently.

Well, no more.

She’s gonna fuck up law school right along side him and she’s gonna wear fucking pink while doing it too!

And like, everything is going fine.

Chrissy’s not stupid, she knows how she’s perceived by people before they get to know her.

Vapid, bimbo, perky, blonde.

Like that’s an insult.

It’s just harder now that she’s away from her girls, gays and theys back home. And everyone here seems to think that the best way to live their lives is to look boring as shit while doing it along with tearing each other down.

She fucking hates it, but she’s determined to see it through.

It helps that she seems to have found the one person on the whole of the fucking east coast who actually listens to what’s coming out of her mouth rather than just paying attention to the hair on her head or staring at her tits.

Robin is so strange.

She’s different in such a refreshing way, it’s like being able to breathe clean air for the first time in years.

And she’s fucking sharp. And sweet. And so, so comforting.

Chrissy would have never managed to survive the depression of those first few weeks without her.

And like, she’s not ignorant to the fact that Robin sometimes does look at her boobs but at the same time it just feels different coming from a woman than it does a man. It doesn’t feel so objectifying.

Instead of putting Chrissy on edge it makes her feel a little smug. A little proud of herself, it makes her feel attractive and desired in a way she hasn’t felt in a very long time.

Is that sexist? To prefer the attentions of a woman over a man when both do it just fine for her?

Chrissy’s not exactly sure, but she knows she enjoys it when it’s coming from Robin.

So maybe it’s a Robin thing.

Chrissy honestly thinks things are looking up for her.

Until Jason introduces Nicole.

His fucking fiancee???

It’s been, like, four months since they broke up.

Nicole hates her guts, she can tell. She thinks she’s some two braincelled idiot who got into Harvard on daddy’s dime and needs to be babied through the simplest of tasks while not understanding how condescending everyone’s been the whole time.

Chrissy fucking understands. She’s been through it all before, but back then she had people by her side. It’s all so fucking childish. The world already hates women enough, Chrissy desperately doesn’t want to be at another womans throat, over a man no less, but Nicole doesn’t seem to feel the same way.

She’s ambitious and cut-throat and dedicated and a little bit terrifying.

Apart from Robin, she’s on her fucking own out here.

And she needs something.

Something of home to bring some light back into her life.

So she gets in her car and just drives around the streets hoping something will catch her eye.

And it does.

Some tiny little hole in the wall salon with a pride flag out the front that she’s immediately drawn to because god damn it she misses her friends. The girls, the gays, the theys.

As soon as she pulls over she feels both simultaneously like she’s come home and she definitely won’t fit in here, but she’s so emotionally raw at this stage it all kinda ends up converging on her and now she’s standing in front of a mostly empty salon and there’s a guy looking at her and she’s just fucking crying.

Through her blurry vision she can see the guy approaching and she really fucking hopes this isn’t gonna turn into a thing because she just does not have any spoons left to deal with some creep right now.

But he seems to sense how he’s coming off because he becomes a little more effeminate from one step to the next.

“You okay, honey?” He asks, big brown eyes wide with concern and a hand covered in rings hovering over her shoulder, not touching. He has a cigarette in the other hand, held away to keep the smoke from reaching her, his arms covered in ink but Chrissy wants nothing more than a cigarette right now.

Or, that’s kind of a lie, but she’d love one in all honesty. She hasn’t smoked in so long.

The guy spots her eyeing it, sticking the cigarette back between his plush lips and needing to use both hands to pull his carton from his pants considering they’re so tight.

“Bad day?” He hands her one and Chrissy ends up breaking down all over again.

She tells him that it hasn’t just been a bad day, but a bad half a year, really. She tells him all about Harvard and Jason and her professors and Robin and by the end of her ranting they’re sitting back in the breakroom of the salon. They guy’s name is Eddie, she learns and despite his mean and scary exterior Chrissy thinks he might be the gentles person she’s met in this whole god forsaken city.

He holds her hands between his and listens to her. Actually hears her talk and pays attention and is concerned and attentive and she loves him for it.

He helps her find her confidence again, at least for the rest of the day. They commiserate about how they both stick out like sore thumbs in their communities and how people need to just kinda get over it.

He encourages her not to let the normies win, do go hang out with Robin, to go kick ass and she’s just wondering how on earth she can ever repay the favour when they hear

“Knock, knock.”

Coming from the front of the salon.

Eddie’s whole face drains of colour before immediately turning red and he bolts up from his chair, stumbling out of the staffroom and moving back behind the receptionists desk.

Chrissy gets to watch in real time as all of Eddie’s incredible confidence and easy lightheartedness disappears into a vat of nerves mostly hidden by cheeky flirtation as he twirls a lock of hair around his finger and bats his eyelashes at the Hot UPS Guy who looks equally as charmed.

When the guy, Steve, has to get back to his route, Eddie practically melts against the desk as soon as he’s out of sight.

“Looks like I’m not the only one who needs help.”

Eddie rolls his eyes at her but smiles anyway. “I had that handled just fine.”

Over the next few months, she and Eddie get closer, Eddie and Steve stay exactly where they were that first day and she and Robin are quickly approaching best friends level.

But Chrissy is starting to come to terms with the fact that maybe she wants a little more than to be best girly-girl friends with Robin and maybe she wants to stick her tongue down her throat about it.

The two of them are practically attached at the hip, spending all day at classes together, alternating between their respective rooms to study late into the night, ending up in the same bed together and waking up together in the morning.

Chrissy is almost, completely, entirely sure that this is all very not platonic but it’s so difficult to tell.

She’d be constantly sleeping over with her friends back home, hugging, kisses on cheeks, cuddling in bed or when watching movies, just girly things.

But this feels different. Is it different?? Or is this just how Robin is with all her female friends, the same way it’s always been how Chrissy was with her friends back home. How can she tell if it’s going from platonic to romantic??

And all of that needs to go on the backburner anyway because they’re being put on a real life, for realsies you guys case. And if they fuck up this case they could be at fault for someone spending the rest of their fucking life in prison for something they didn’t do??

Unacceptable.

And after Chrissy finds out their client used to be on the same cheer team as her? It was all over. No way was she gonna let her go to prison just because everyone thinks a pretty young woman couldn’t possibly love someone a little older than her.

Not on Chrissy’s watch.

But first she has to deal with Robin’s wardrobe because they professor is insistent that all the women wear skirts and tights and Robin is not having it.

Neither is Chrissy to be fair, so she takes Robin out to the most lavish place she can, decks them both out in the fiercest looking pantsuits they can get their hands on, refusing to back down.

It comes as a surprise to both of them when Nicole stands with them in solidarity as well and now their professor is both outnumbered and losing his arguments with only Jason on his side about this and they fucking win.

It’s only a small win but it still feels fantastic.

Riding her high of winning that small fight, she bursts into the salon and informs Eddie that he is going to either kiss or ask out Steve the next time he sees him and when Eddie reacts like she just said she was going to shave all of his hair off she refuses to hear it.

Because the thing is Eddie is pretty, really pretty and she knows that Steve knows it, but she doesn’t think that Eddie himself is really aware of it. And despite his prettiness, he’s all awkward elbows and knees.

So she gives him some tips and shows him how to highlight certain things about himself, the long legs, the tattooed arms, the hip bones. Even his cute little bum. She teaches him how to subtly pull at his clothes in conversation so some skin is exposed or his tiny little waist is highlighted. She teaches him how to use his eyes to go in for the kill.

He doesn’t seem to think it’ll work but she is almost certain it will.

And it’s confirmed for her when she gets a call later that night from Eddie who sounds fucking over the moon and completely bewildered by the fact that Steve likes him back??? Has done for months?? And they had some incredible dirty nasty sex in the salon after it closed for the night and how they’re going to the movies tomorrow??

Eddie swears he’s gonna send her the biggest fuck off fruit basket he can find.

Everything is looking up for her, especially after she has such a major win in court, figuring out one of the prosecutors witnesses had perjured himself on the stand (without outing him to the whole damn court, thankfully).

Or at least everything was looking up for her until she found herself alone in a room with her professor and she felt the energy in the room shift before it happened.

His hands were on her before she could do anything about it and she cracked him across the face for it before she could even think about what this could do to her legal career going forward.

Because that was the reality of it, wasn’t it?

Either allow herself to get assaulted or destroy her career before it even started.

She didn’t know when her priority had shifted from getting Jason back to actually pursuing this as a future career. But she had found to her own surprise she loved it. She adored it actually.

And now…

Now it would all be gone.

Jason had seen, of course he had and he was less than kind about it because apparently it made more sense that she had fucked her way into Harvard than had actually been smart enough to get there on her own.

She couldn’t stomach anything Nicole could possibly have to say to her but if the way she was glaring at Jason with barely concealed rage after that comment was anything to go by, Chrissy didn’t need to worry too much about that.

She just wanted to go. To get out. She needed to get out. And she would have gotten away scott free if Robin hadn’t been hanging around waiting for her.

Robin’s face broke into a bright smile but that quickly slipped away when she saw the state Chrissy was in. She was all sweet concern and care and affection but Chrissy couldn’t fucking deal with it at that moment, she couldn’t face her.

She couldn’t face Robin who would find out what a fool of herself she’d made believing in Chrissy, when Chrissy had thrown all of their hard work away.

Because no one would ever fucking see her as a person. She was just a piece of ass.

So she ran.

She didn’t even realise where she was running to until she was standing outside the salon doors again.

It was late, they were closed, of course they were, why was she here?

She was standing outside the door crying again like she had been the first time and it was all just so fucking stupid-

“Chrissycakes?”

She was enveloped in Eddie’s arms before she could even blink, being ushered inside and steered back to the staffroom, same as that first time.

There were beer bottles and take out containers over the table and Steve sitting at the table and oh, she’d interrupted something hadn’t she?

What a fucking way to officially meet one of her best friends new boyfriend right?

But they were so sweet.

They sat and listened while she spilled the whole thing, offering at different points to hunt down her professor for her or slash his tires or lose all of his mail or whatever and she was forced to giggle through the tears.

But she shook her head in the end. She was tired. She was sick of having to defend herself constantly.

She needed… she needed to go back to where she belonged.

And she was about to.

She was about to leave the salon, swear to keep in contact with Eddie because god damn it she loved him now and she was ready to run.

But then there was a hammering at the door and Chrissy poked her head out to see Nicole standing there looking like she was on a fucking crusade.

And… was that…?

Robin was standing behind her, looking like she was just trying not to get in Nicole’s way.

Eddie grumbled to himself about changing the damn salons opening hours if this was to continue but he unlocked the door anyway.

Nicole burst in all fire and determination, shoving her finger directly in Chrissy’s face.

“I hated you. But god fucking damn it if you didn’t prove to me that this is the career you belong in. And I refuse to stand by and see an admirable woman of your smarts and calibre get run over by some small dicked professor with a receding hairline. You’re so much more than that. So c’mon. We’re breaking through that fucking glass ceiling if it kills us.”

Holy shit.

Robin pulled her into a tight hug, warm and comforting and a little too long to be platonic, running a hand through her hair.

“We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with Chris, but… you deserve to be in that courtroom.” She muttered into her ear and Chrissy could do nothing but nod into Robin’s neck.

She heard Eddie sigh behind her. “Okay if we’re doing this then… I need to make a few calls.”

A few days later Chrissy made her triumphant return to the courtroom. Everyone was there to support her. Eddie, Steve, her besties from back home that Eddie had called, telling them it was a friend emergency and so of course they all came right away along with Robin and Nicole bracketing her on each side.

And while she could tell the court wasn’t taking her rants on hair care very seriously, when she finally came out with the verbal crackdown, proving the witness was actually the murderer, the gasps from the gallery were enough to feed her for years to come.

When all was said and done at the celebration later that night, she found herself being approached by Jason.

He told her it was a mistake to let her go, to discard her the way he had and she agreed that yes it was. But his mistakes weren’t her problem anymore. And from the look of it they weren’t Nicole’s problem either.

Jason surprisingly took it well enough, mentioning that he never really felt the same passion for law that she so clearly possessed.

She wished him luck with finding what he wanted to do.

But now.

Now she needed to find Robin.

Chrissy couldn’t take it anymore.

So weaving through the people around her, she grabbed at Robin’s hand, dragging her away from Steve who she had become inseparable with and pushing her into the hallway.

Robin didn’t even have a chance to ask what was happening before Chrissy was on her, pressing her into a wall, holding her close with her hands on either side of her face, kissing her with so much longing and elation and joy and happiness that when she pulled away Robin looked completely dazed.

Robin blinked slowly a few times before her face broke into a wide grin.

“Me too.”

#buckingham #robin buckley #chrissy cunningham #robin x chrissy #buckingham fic #legally blonde au #buckingham legally blonde au #chrissy x robin #steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #stranger things #penny00dreadful #i dont know what happened #it just appeared #wild huh?

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saphig-iawn · 5 months

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Day 7 of Turning me into Me

I've done it. My dear sweet girlies, my shes, gays, theys, and whatever-the-hays, I've done it. I have gone 7 whole days sticking to my plan. On November 12th I saw my face without a beard for the first time in 11 years and while my mask of masculinity was gone I still didn't like what I saw. I chose that day to be the worst I would ever feel about myself and made a decision to put the future me into production, rather than wait for HRT to do it all for me. I was inspired by a trans friend of mine who went through a similar journey to get surgery and she just told me so bluntly how easy it'd be. So I did.

And here I am, a whole week of walking every day, a whole week of not eating when I'm bored, a whole week of no sugar drinks (sorry monster). I am the happiest I have ever been. My head is so full of the things I'd wear, the makeup I'd try, the ways I can enjoy my body (also tbh I am really excited about the clothes holy FUCK). It was as easy as my friend said, "just don't do it, lol" were literally the words out of her mouth. I even took my first selfie that I liked.

But these aren't the only reasons why I'm still going. It is everyone who has come by and seen me talking about my journey and have shown me support. I've had DMs, Asks, RBs all telling me how they found my writing at the right time, and also at the wrong time and giving them something to think about. The fact that little old me could be a single part of someone's journey into their true self is just.. it.. it makes this so much better and so much more worthwhile.

You see, I used to be in a big discord server that belonged to a streamer. Over time it became harder to remain there. I wasn't out at the time but had so many girlies who were and they fought so well when laddish bigotry and cishet male-ry would bubble up and ruin people's day. But then one particularly bad night would result in blatant transphobia being slung in the chat and despite so many girlies calling it out, it was normalised by the server owner. I was DMing the girlies about how it just fucking sucked and that I wanted to do something but I was so scared and so tired and they sympathised with me. But I had had enough and thus turned my coming out into a weapon. I wanted them to know that their words hurt so many more people than they think; the silent queers that sit and see bigotry become commonplace in a space that has been advertised as safe, the questioning girls-to-be and boys-to-be seeing people write off their feelings under Devil's Advocacy. I told them they weren't allies, there was no support, and I was coming out and they better fucking pack it in. But when the culture is entrenched, even something like that doesn't change much. But my coming out caused a ripple, and I did see the names of people I had never interacted with before show love, and I knew that it was enough for them. I hope that me, setting myself ablaze in that server and leaving from the ashes, was enough for those names I saw.

A big thank you to everyone who has said hello, got in touch, or even just liked. I have such a deep and unshakeable love for you.

#saphi's journey #transition timeline #trans pride #trans joy #transgender #transfem #trans #mtf trans #girlslikeus #transisbeautiful #mtf #coming out #lgbt #transfemme #gender journey #gender thoughts #gender euphoria

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boxwinebaddie · 8 months

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if u could assign yourself one of your ninaverse characters who would it be🤨

okay wait a minute, this was kind of difficult i had to break it down…BUT I THINK I CRACKED IT!!!!!

also sorry you do not have to read this, this is a nina character study but it was really interesting to me lmaooooo. i dropped some nina pic crews at the bottom and bolded the important bit. <3

tysm for asking btw! this was really fun omg

so i think i...Present the most like bebe? like i, unfortunately, am THAT annoying. all of her dialogue is only a slightly barbiefied exaggerated version of what i might say...and not by that much. i am a fashion y2k mall crawl slay olay swear on britney girlie!!! and i would hit u with my purse if u were moping around about a boy that didn't deserve u!!! i would hit that man with my car!!!! if i could drive!!! which i cant!!! well!! im for the girls gays and theys!

so i guess like on the more extroverted side of my personality i would be bebe but on the more introverted side...

i am very pep!stan. like bebes dialogue is the easiest for me to write, but all of stans introspection is the easiest for me to write because i just really...feel him in my bones. like i really kind of AM a lot of him in pep at this point bc i am also a very mentally ill, dramatic, crybaby chaotic bisexual, broken but tries to fix everyone human. i also never stopped doing egirl eyeliner/makeup...and i am also x 300 ( can i stop saying also pls ) asian and white but extremely white passing so...i would probably look the most like egirl pep!stan with bebe y2k accoutrements.

he’s special to me bc he’s a lot like me so if you're reading pep or even like rm stan ( i want to be him but i am not a sexy rockstar with ptsd unfortunately ) and something feels particularly strong to you…i probably lived it. like unfortunately, i was an alcohol coping mechanism girlie in hs and most of college :/ i gave him my bipolar, my cringey middle school emo phase, irl i won shot roulette, i do my best, i cry a lot, i am a lover girl, i also am short and cant drive...was in love with my best friend in hs lmaoooo

so i'm kind of a bebe sun...stan moon?

which really should just make me kenny because kenny naturally is kind of the out of pocket-depression bridge between bebe/stan, and like i do b hitting on all my friends and actin up...but depending on how much i am vibing i am either a strong tequila ten kenny on the tabletop or i am kyle on his phone in the corner overstimulated.

but tbh i am probably a kyle rising...just bc of academic ravenclaw girl vibes. he also has all my cat girl energies, me being annoyed 24/7, the thrift store sweaters, pride and prejudice is also my favorite book, his need for praise, in general but mostly academically ( ok but stan being terrible at math is extremely me ) OK OK OK WAIT BEING IN LOVE WITH MY BFF IN HS IS ACTUALLY MORE KYLE THAN STAN FOR ME!!! if u feel that horrible pain in ur heart reading pep...like specifically watching kyle just be in love with stan...THAT WAS ME BABY THATS ALL REAL!! I WAS KYLE

i can also be a little marjorine bc i really like hello kitty and sometimes i am a soft gal but unfortunately my writer girl joker arc is winning rn.

IN CONCLUSION!!!!!!

i look and act the most like bebe, i think/feel the most like stan but i am the most like kyle?

like my outside is very pink y2k, my soul is very cringey, emo, sad, doing my best, finger guns and my brain is very like writer girl, riddles, school, mom friend, anxious neroutic.

i am like if you took stan ( specifically his nice sad heart but also his edgy boy depression ), dyed his hair manic pixie dream girl insane bitch blue, did his emo boy eyeliner to the max, put him in a pink juicy couture rm!bebe tracksuit, basically gave him all of bebe's y2k princess girlbossery and gave him kyles crazy insane boy anxiety overload, perpetual exhaustion, dark academia brain capacity…also made him a tired boxwine drinking dying college student like rm!kyle….THATS ME BABY!

ahdslksahdldas HELP

ok idk if this helps i am sad that i am worried about my digital footprint otherwise i would post pictures!!! most of you remember what i look like tho haha! rip but here are weird piccrews i did idk if this is gonna help even...

also my hair is usually much more blue rn it is faded i need to redye her it’s like dark blue on the top and light blue near the ends! my favorite color is green but i wear a lot of pink, also that is my cat lily!

LAST ALSO OMG I DO NOT HAVE FRECKLES IM A LIAR BUT I DO DRAW THEM ON EVERYDAY LIKE A DIRTY LYING FAKEY FAKER!

thank u for coming to my red talk!

-uncle nina, bebe sun stan moon kyle rising

#like i really am all three kinda blended into a little box wine beverage #i am also a kyle swiftie and a stan maccaferty girl im the joker ik #really if u put a gun to my head…id be stan but Pink #but also if i was less depressed and more annoyed id be pink kyle #so i really am either stan or kyle dressed up like bebe #i am particularly drawn to writing like mad as hell academic tired secretly cares neurotic character #and is wonderful and kind and so sad golden retriever lover boy characters #bc both are so me #this was insane thank u for reading this #nina ceo of mean smart gay boys and sad nice bisexual boys hq

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sunflowerharrington · 2 years

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Hey babe <3

Soft Kai headcanons? No rush

Love you

firstly, i love you too babes!! <3

wc - around 740 i think

notes - sorry not sorry xoxo

warning(s) - tw mention of murder, and also kai anderson obviously, one mention of lingerie

here he is, the main man of this post himself. mr kool kid with a k 😎

girlies, gays and theys, welcome to my unhinged headcanons about (blue-haired) kai anderson that are true because i said so and what i say in this post goes :)

~ and also because i’m having a moment of absolute “what the fuck-ery” right now for no reason. i’m taking absolutely no criticisms here, thank you :) ~

— still can't tie his fucking shoelaces

— manchild

— has posters of himself all over his bedroom, because what absolute madlad doesn’t?

— puts on a fucking performance in the shower. i’m talking christina aguilera here. i’m talking beyoncé and rihanna. not their songs but he goes above and beyond singing in the shower, and you’d find that so cute if you caught him

— …but it’s ONLY when he’s alone, or so he thinks sometimes

— is a pro at the google dinosaur run game that comes up when there’s no internet available

— would low-key do this when alone, like completely completely alone; vibing to doja cat while he’s working out at the gym. and wrecking ball by miley cyrus.

“…call him ed sheeran he’s in love with my body, they say i just got a buck yeah get into it, yuh. pop out with a truck— WHAT THE FUCK HARRISON? NO, I'M NOT LISTENING TO THAT SHIT. IT’S A SONG ABOUT WORLD DOMINATION!! NOO, IT'S NOT BY A GIRL! bitches can’t sing, my child.”

— […britney spears…👀]

— can almost instantly hack into somebody’s phone, laptop, tablet or any other sort of technology HAHA NERD

— small dick energy but has a fucking sledgehammer

— “…don’t listen to rap music!” listens to it. probably kanye west, because who doesn’t love yeezus? i mean kai thinks he’s god, kanye thinks he’s jesus… i’m trying to make a point here but it’s not working help 😭🫠

— also looks on facebook for hot single moms to fuck. preferably milfs

— “he’s cooooraliiine!” 🎶

— (totally bought some of belle delphine’s bathwater when that was a thing 🤭)

— had a bowl cut when he was a lickle baba and, like everyone in the world ever except jeff pfister and mutt nutter, absolutely hated bowl cuts

— “lost his virginity” to a pillow. not really, but that’s what i think

— is a pro at mario kart and can beat anyone at it, except me. i’m a champion at that game, i swear it babes

— commitment issues

— *whispers* daddy issues…

OKAYY I'M DONE WITH THE UNHINGED ONES, here’s some soft!kai headcanons for my love, meg :)

— brushes your hair sometimes, and braids it

— you’re sitting on the floor on a cushion between his legs as his fingers dance through your hair, braiding away the strands of hair from around your face…

— throws temper tantrums but sometimes if he’s feeling like a human he’ll let you run your hands through his hair to calm him down

— thinks your massages are fucking deadly when you do them (deadly means good. it’s just the kind of slang i use)

— takes you out on dates every so often and steals some of your fries if you get fries, but you think it’s cute because it’s so obvious he’s doing it

— he will fall in love with you if you like mountain dew and cheetos, absolutely no hesitation. he’d never admit it though

— and if you have the same views as him, god, you’re his for life

— likes to have you sitting on his lap during cult meetings sometimes to show the other men and women that you’re his number one, though he does preach about equality

— also will not hesitate to murder anyone who tries to hurt you (except winter. if winter ever hurt you [which imo i don’t think she would on purpose] then kai would say it’s your fault, but other than that…)

— if he’s feeling extra nice he might buy you a gift or something; and by that i mean either some lingerie or something that could be put on you to make you appear even more sexy in his mind. he buys it for you but really it’s for him. but it’s the thought that counts!

— and might even call you mrs anderson during a cult meeting to see how you’d react, though he’d never want to marry anybody, he still considers the thought of it

— nicknames for you include; his angel, his little lamb, his princess, his goddess (if he’s feeling a lil spicy). always has to have ‘his’ in front of it, though. you are his, after all

— matching tattoos? matching tattoos. maybe one on y’all’s pinky fingers to signify a deeper, more emotional connection— according to kai

okayy, i’m done for now but i might come back and add more tomorrow it’s currently like almost 3AM and i am KNACKERED, babes

@xxlangdon @sympathyforher @unlivingdreams @quickiesgirl @langdon-cumslut my lovelies

#american horror story #ahs #kai anderson #ahs cult #ahs fanfic #ahs fandom #ahs headcanon #kai anderson headcanons #chaotic evil coraline : kai anderson

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