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littlemisslipbalm · 2 years

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How the Kiszkas chose their Earth names

An 'A billion light years from here' installment!

If the Kiszkas were Aliens!AU -- Stories of family, friendship and fun

Enjoy background on how the alien kiszkas came to choose their names! Once more, inspiration was largely pulled from talking with @ofthecaravel so i am forever indebted to her <3 let me know what y'all think if you want and come chat w me about these alien guys bc i have a lot of thoughts about them

Word Count: 979 | Warnings: swearing, complicated alien timeline (don't worry about it), idk bros being bros! Danny appearance :)

When choosing their Earth names initially, Josh and Jake were sure they needed to pick ones that weren’t going to make them stick out. They were already worried about trying to fit in on Earth, behaviorally, they needed their names to be the least of their concerns.

One day, as the time was drawing near for the twins' departure to the new planet, they were seated around a table with their little brother. They had agreed that their little brother wouldn’t bother to pick an Earth name without them, so they had to do it all together.

“Thank you for convening. So I did some research on male names in the United States of America on Seven – I mean, Earth,” Josh starts, multiple pages of notes scribbled out before him. He already was trying to practice his English even if when they’d arrived their human bodies would be incapable of speech.

Jake crosses his arms over his chest and stares at his twin expectantly. Sam’s foot wiggles impatiently in the air in his cross legged position.

“And I think we should look into names from this book they call ‘The Bible’ – I believe it’s their retelling of the time when some alien species made itself known to them for a while, lots of alien tech mentioned they just don’t realize it. Anywho, it seems like a lot of the terrestrials in that region name their progeny after characters in it. Here’s a list.”

“I want to be Jacob,” Jake states immediately, eyes flickering over the page blankly, soaking up the information in one second. “It says he fucks.”

“That’s not what it says, brother,” Josh responds with a half-frown.

“Let me read that,” Sam says immediately, snatching the paper from his sibling’s hand. Glancing over it, his eyes not as fast, he hums as the information flows into him. “You said Jacob procreated at this God figure’s request, I’d say it’s fair to say ‘he fucks’.”

Josh wrinkles his nose and huffs out a sigh.

“I’d like to be Samuel,” Sam says after thinking about the list quietly. “He’s a judge –”

“And you’re judgey,” Jake finishes. “It makes sense, we get it. Brother, I think you should be Joshua. He hangs out on mountains a lot.”

“I do love a good mountain top,” Josh nods in agreement, scribbling down their three Earth names.

“Now middle names,” Josh continues, but the other two groan.

“I don’t care what my middle name is, just pick for me, Joshua,” Jake says before getting up to walk away, testing out the new name for his brother. Oddly, he found that he liked it a lot.

“Same here,” Sam pushes away from the table and waves his hand at Josh when he tries to protest.

Josh grumbles for a few minutes but then ducks his head and stares down at his extensive research list. After a minute, the frown on his face turns into a triumphant smile. He jots down the middle names that he wanted for himself and his brothers.

“You picked the lead archangel for your middle name but gave me the one that doubted their god?” Jake all but screeches at his brother when he sees the finalized names days before they leave for Earth.

Josh shrugs and attempts to keep the smirk off of his face, “You said and I quote ‘just pick for me’ and that’s what I did. Be grateful I didn’t choose Judas or something. Plus, Thomas was really into their god once he saw the marks in his hands. He was just a visual learner…kind of like you.”

Jake rolls his eyes and opens his mouth to continue to argue but an irate Sam cuts him off.

“Who the fuck is Francis? He’s not even in the Bible!”

“He’s in their Bible lore, though,” Josh reasons. “I didn’t see one that fit you in the actual book so I did some more research and Francis was their saint of animals and ecology.”

“Oh,” Sam says, surprisingly pleased. “Thanks, brother. That’s actually perfect. Samuel Francis, sounds like he fucks, for sure.”

“You know when we arrive on earth we’ll be children and…incapable of fucking?” Josh tries, worried that his brothers weren’t fully prepared for living on Earth as humans.

“So you gave him a cool and fitting name but gave me Thomas and yourself Michael?…It just seems a little messed up to me,” Jake decides to speak up about his discontent again.

“Just. Pick. For. Me.” Josh repeats. “Next time stick around if you don’t want to be doubting Thomas.”

When Sam brought home Daniel, the brothers had all given themselves a pat on the back for choosing their Earth names from the Bible, seeing that Daniel’s name was also one found in that book.

“Hey, Daniel,” Josh called from across the room, curious, “What’s your middle name?”

“Robert.”

“That’s not in the Bible,” Jake says immediately.

“Huh?” Danny looks between the brothers who are all staring at him with wide eyes.

“Don’t worry about it, Daniel,” Sam says immediately, pushing Danny to continue their work on a lego pirate ship the six year olds were intent upon building.

Josh and Jake look at one another. Jake’s face is contorted into one of silent rage.

In their minds they communicate, Jake yelling at Josh ever so silently. “Middle names don’t have to be from the Bible, you stupid idiot.”

“Too late to change it now though, huh?”

“I’m never ever calling you Joshua Michael.”

“And I’m never calling you…your full name, Jake.” Josh refused to call Jake, ‘Jacob’ because of why Jake had chosen the name. He had been delighted to find out that all of their chosen names had nicknames attached to them. It made his life easier.

They grew into their Earth names, they became Jake, Josh and Sam.

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littlemisslipbalm · 2 years

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A billion light years from here

A Homesick Alien Josh Kiszka AU

A special thanks to @ofthecaravel without you none of this would have been possible. My brain couldn't have expanded upon Josh potentially being an alien without you lol. More installments to come, potentially. There's just so much evidence to suggest the Kiszkas are aliens...Also I'm so soft for homesick alien josh you guys !!!

gif credit to @edgeofgreta (not sure if shes still on here but I found this on pinterest and saw the bottom right and wanted to tag!)

Word Count: 3.1k | Warnings: swearing, brothers being brothers, idk alien stuff, sci-fi inaccuracies, mythology/constellation alien names, dw about it i think... no reader just bros vibing

Enjoy! and as always pls reblog and let me know what you think

Josh and his brothers had been on Earth for a long time now. Assimilating had been relatively easy for Sam and Jake. They loved this planet, especially compared to their home. Josh wasn’t sure he agreed with his brothers.

He missed the high mountains with crystals that swirled around their tops. He missed the beach with its silver water lapping at his toes. He missed the stars he could see so clearly from his home planet. Ones that didn’t even appear in the Earth’s night sky. He missed his cosmos and the vibrations of the matter on his planet. He missed its rings that were perfect for skating on top of. He missed being understood.

No terrestrial language could encompass some of his thoughts. He always attempted to be understood here but found that he ended up confusing more people. It’s why it stung when people said they couldn’t understand what he was saying in their songs. It was the closest he could get to explaining what it felt like when he was home.

On Earth, he’d often find himself sitting on beaches and tops of mountains, attempting to replicate the locations he found comfort in on his home planet. His toes resting in sand or tall grass. His eyes cast upon the night sky, searching in his mind the image of his home, a billion light years from here. He longed for the familiarity of his home, as welcoming as Earth had been.

He loved that his brothers had found solace on this planet. It had taken them a long time to settle on Earth. But Sam had been insistent and like the youngest sibling he was, he managed to win over his brothers.

Frankenmuth was chosen due to its easy accessibility with their spaceship. The woods were a great place to hide it. The weather in the Midwest also was the closest to their home planet’s climate. Cold. Certainly not as cold as the home planet, but they wanted to go where people were on the Earth. English had also been the easiest language for them to learn. Josh just always had trouble perfecting his midwestern accent, always sounding a little different than the rest. Sam’s was perfect. Jake had watched a few to many western cowboy movies in preparation making his voice raspier.

In their terrestrial youth, Jake had quickly learned about the existence of the guitar and found it endlessly entertaining. He enjoyed making music so much that he preferred to occupy his time with playing rather than interacting with humans. Sam just liked the earthly pleasures, he liked that he could do whatever he pleased when he pleased. It also helped that he found humans so fun to play with, either judging them to be worthy of his time or finding them amusing for their stupidity.

When he had met Daniel, he had quickly brought him home and told his brothers that he had found a ‘human pet.’ The twins were quick to correct Sam and tell him that you were supposed to call them ‘best friends.’ Sam had nodded and Danny had smiled nervously before laughing hysterically when Sam explained that he had only been confused since they were all aliens and ‘best friend’ wasn’t a term in their native language. After years of trying to explain to Daniel that they were serious, the Kiszkas gave up and just laughed along with him when they mentioned alien matters.

When Jake decided to start the band, the rest of the brothers agreed to make him happy. Family was everything to them. When the band took off, Josh was happy he got to dress up because he could make his stage outfits resemble their home planet's clothes. Growing up on Earth had been confusing for Josh for a multitude of reasons, but he never really got a handle on their fashion and had trouble with dressing himself. Eventually he grew content to have his daily wardrobe consist of five articles of clothing with multiple replicas of them. He found most comfort in the white t-shirt, khakis and yellow jacket combination. The only time he felt truly like himself was on stage in the jumpsuits. His body swaddled like the planet’s clothes. Safe and secure and sparkly with stardust. Except Earth didn’t have stardust, just sequins and rhinestones. He made do.

With many of his clothes he also added the insignia of what essentially was their family crest from the home planet. The triangle with lines through it. It calmed him to be surrounded by the symbol, reminding him that he was a part of something greater than himself.

Still, the ways he attempted to mute his homesickness were not quite enough. He hadn’t been home in almost 27 Earth years. Sam was lucky, he thought, he had been too young to go first, making Jake and Josh journey there first and then have Sam be sent to them. It meant he had been at home more recently than his older brothers.

An Earth week before the anniversary of Jake and Josh’s arrival on the planet, Josh decided to ask his brothers for something he had been thinking about for a while. A way to placate his homesickness.

“You know, our arrival anniversary is coming up and I’ve been thinking,” Josh starts, quietly, nervously.

“Birthday, Josh,” Jake corrects, head facing the ceiling, body sprawled on the couch.

“Whatever, same thing,” He sighs. “I was thinking, you, me and Sammy could go on a road trip.”

Sam’s head turns to the conversation now that he’s heard his name.

“Oh,” Jake’s ears perk at the idea of an adventure. He loved to travel. “Where to?”

“Home.” Josh says, voice still soft, pleading.

“You want to road trip to Frankenmuth? That’s so boring, Josh,” Sam whines.

“Why not somewhere we’ve never been before?” Jake tries to reason.

“Not Frankenmuth,” Josh stops them from coming up with some fantastical earthly roadtrip. “Except to get the ship. I mean our real home.”

“Oh…” This gets Jake’s attention. “Josh. Are you sure?”

“We haven’t gone home in almost 27 Earth years, Jacob. That’s almost a million years at home. I miss it so fucking much it hurts.” Josh puts his hand over his chest, where his heart beats, where it aches.

Jake can feel it. They were alien identical twins after all, more connected than any Earth twins ever could be. There’s no more discussion because he understands.

“Alright,” Jake nods, looking his brother deeply in the eye. The very same eyes as the ones in his own head. “Roadtrip home coming right up.”

“But!” Sam begins to protest.

“Shut it, Sam.” Jake stands and shoots his younger brother a look. “It’s our arrival anniversary, our wish. You’re coming.”

Josh beams, feeling like he was already flying over the moon. Sam huffs and grumbles a little before stalking off, but deep down he knows he’d do anything for his brothers.

One week later, the three of them are trekking into the woods behind their Frankenmuth adolescent home. Josh is grinning at the sky as he walks ahead of his brothers, just one little backpack on his shoulders.

Jake is carrying a guitar case with his acoustic on his back and a duffel in his right hand. He couldn’t bring the Les Paul. The electrical currents on their home planet would blow out the strings if he even tried to strum it when it was plugged into an amp. He had also brought his harmonica in case something went wrong with the acoustic. On his head sat his favorite black hat, wide brimmed enough to cover his face from the harsh rays of the suns at home.

Sam was still the least happy about this journey to their home planet, dragging his feet as they walked. His backpack was packed to the brim with things he hoped would get him through this. Namely, enough edibles to keep him blissfully high throughout the trip. Another reason he loved Earth, recreational cannibus use. If only they could grow it on their home planet.

“Are we sure Daniel can’t come?” Sam asks for the hundredth time as they walk upon the clearing where the spaceship was stored.

“He wouldn’t be able to withstand the atmosphere there, Sam,” Jake sighs. “Do you want him to die?”

“No,” Sam grumbles and kicks a shoe at the ground, his sneaker kicking up some dirt. “I just feel bad that he thinks we didn’t invite him to go to the Caribbean with us.”

“We’ll be back before he knows it. Two weeks there is just a day here. The only reason we’re going to be gone for an Earth week is all the travel time,” Josh reasons, finishing uncovering the entire machine that had brought them here in the first place.

They walk up into the ship and begin to get settled. It looked the same as it did 26 years ago, completely maintained. Sometimes Josh would come out and visit it when they still lived in Michigan, sitting inside and pretending like he was flying home. He’s the one who kept it clean.

Jake climbs into the pilot’s seat and Josh sits beside him. Sam stays in the cabin, never allowed to go near the cockpit after his fifth arrival anniversary.

Jake fiddles with some switches after getting comfortable, making sure his hat was on just right and his braid was in place.

One last switch is flicked by his left hand, it turns a glowing red and the ship hums to life. He grins, the sound welcoming and familiar. Josh watches his twin, clearly pleased by his behavior.

“Captain Jacob Thomas Kiszka, reporting for duty,” Jake says into the intercom, the smile never leaving his face as he looks to his twin and hears Sam’s groan. “Let’s hope for smooth sailing.”

Josh fiddles with some switches on his side and the radio buzzes to life. Jake requests something and Josh shuts his eyes and concentrates. Soon enough the radio hums with static and then the song Jake wants is playing.

When the ship touches down on their home planet, Sam blinks the sleep from his bleary eyes and looks out the window. Seeing it for the first time in 24 years is a little shocking even for him. When he left, he felt no sorrow for what he was leaving behind. Certain that Earth was superior to this quiet planet, but seeing his first true home once more left him breathless. It was tranquil and vast. The landscape unlike any place on Earth, the colors more vibrant than any artificial color produced by those companies on Earth that were quickly ruining it. He found himself unexpectedly smiling, just a little bit. He still would choose Earth over here every day of his life.

Once Jake had parked them in the ship lot on the silver sea, Josh rushed out of the ship first. His eyes are as wide as could be and they sparkle in the fading light of the first sun of their planet. He turns around himself looking at everything and anything before beginning to ramble, immediately slipping back into their native language now that they are home.

Jake quirks a brow, almost instinctively going to stop Josh from speaking it, but realizing that it was fine. It’s actually calming to him to hear Josh speak in his native tongue, his thoughts more ordered than in English. Even if Jake usually knew what Josh meant in English, it was nice to hear his brother relaxed in his speech.

Sam heard it too and shook his head before swearing in English, “I’m not speaking that shit, even if we’re here. It’s not necessary, everyone here probably knows Earth English by now.”

Josh sighs, continuing in their native tongue, “You don’t know that. It’s just because you’re rusty, wee one.” Little shit wasn’t exactly a term in the language.

Sam rolls his eyes.

They arrive at the resort they decided to reside at during their two week long visit after going through intergalactic customs. It wasn’t very official but the ones who lived on this planet who had been to Earth before thought it was an interesting concept to have when traveling to different countries and had implemented one on their home. It was mostly just to make sure that travelers who arrived on the planet knew what they were doing and how to get around.

Sam got in a bit of trouble with the customs agent when he tried to refuse to speak one of the accepted languages, but Josh stepped in for him.

“He’s a part of our family. Forgive him, he’s rusty at the language. We’ve been on Seven for many moons.”

The agent understood and nodded before asking, “Names.”

“Jacob Thomas Kiszka.” Jake says confidently before frowning. “Oh. Forgive me. Pollux Geminorum Zaskkis.”

“Castores Geminorum Zaskkis,” Josh says easily before elbowing Sam to speak.

“Regulus Aries Zaskkis,” He huffs and rolls his eyes again, hip jutting out with his arms crossed as he stands beside his older brothers.

“It’s so classic that your names here would have a pretentious meaning on a planet one billion light years apart,” Sam says as they walk away.

“And yours doesn’t?” Jake quips.

“Things are connected very mysteriously, indeed, Sammy.” Josh replies.

Sam smiles at his brother still using his Earth name and for that he is grateful.

Josh was happy to go off on his own for the majority of their trip, visiting all of his favorite places. The crystal mountains, the rings, the forests, the ice caps, all of it just as beautiful as he remembered. Mid-week on the planet, he insisted that Jake and Sam come with him to the beach.

“You guys love the beach, come on! The water is silver,” Josh adds as if that is the biggest attraction of the beach.

Jake and Sam agreed, albeit begrudgingly, if only to placate their brother and have a chance to be shirtless once more. On the home planet they were required to wear jumpsuits. Josh loved the safety, but Jake and Sam were rather put off by them. Constricting as fuck, they both put it. Hence why they reveled in going shirtless on Earth so often. It also helped bring down their body temperatures on Earth, their blood running hotter than humans. Danny always mentioned it when standing beside the Kiszkas. Human furnaces, he’d say and the brothers would laugh.

At the beach, they were able to shed the uniforms which was relieving, but the pair still sat there unhappily watching as Josh hung out where the sand met the silver. He swore it was the best place to watch the star fights happening just beyond the small atmosphere of the planet.

Jake had his big black hat low on his head, half-moon glasses pushed against his face as well. On the beach it was hot, hotter than anywhere else on the planet. It made his already hot blood uncomfortably warm. His red shorts were hiked around his thighs attempting to allow himself to potentially tan.

At least they had margaritas to cool them off, he thought, as he watched Sam return from the beach bar. The drinks in his hands were in huge mugs with curly vibrant colored straws in them. Jake grimaced at them.

Sam sat beside his older brother after handing him his drink. They had matching red striped beach chairs, the one to Jake’s left was vacant with Josh off on his own. Sam slumps after a sip of his margarita.

“This doesn’t help,” He sighs after sucking down half of it. The straw hat that adorned his head sat hard on his head, pointy and prickly from disuse. He had to buy one at the tourist shop when he realized he forgot to pack a hat. Now who’s laughing at my hat, jackass, Jake had said when Sam had returned from the store. Deciding something, Sam sits back up and rummages in his tote bag he had brought before producing a soda can.

Upon further inspection one would realize that this was a drinkable Sam had brought from Earth. As he cracks the tab, a thought flashes in his mind about pressurization, but the thought is seconds too late. The drink is exploding from the small opening and Jake is cackling with laughter as it flies directly into Sam’s face.

Sam, ever the youngest sibling, opens his mouth and attempts to get as much of the liquid in his mouth as possible as the pressurized liquid continues to pound into his face.

Only five minutes later, Josh is returning to his brothers from the water, skin glistening silver from his swim. Droplets falling around his body as he shakes his head like a dog.

“What the hell happened to you?” He asks the drenched version of his little brother sitting beside a still chuckling Jake.

Sam’s hair is wet and his straw hat is now limp, but his eyes are droopy and he has a bit of a content look on his face. Even if the pressurization was different on this planet, so was the way weed affected them. He was already unbelievably stoned.

“Space boys make do,” He grins lazily, his right hand making a finger gun at his oldest brother.

This time, Jake falls out of his beach chair in laughter, yelping slightly from the warm sand but still too caught up in Sam’s behavior.

“Drinkable,” Jake finally responds after clambering back into his chair.

Josh nods understandingly. “Just smoke joints Sammy, like an adult,” He says as he goes to sit beside his twin.

His hair is already drying, the curls scrunching up from the long form they had been in from the water. He looks over at Jake and the sleeping Sam beside him, the cosmos laid out just behind them on the beach. Other residents mingled around the beach but for the most part, Josh felt like he was alone on the planet with his brothers.

He breathes the fresh air deeply. “I love you both so much. Thank you for doing this with me. I am happy to have come back.”

Then he looks up at the sky directly above him. “I will be happy to go home, though.”

Jake smiles beneath his hat and then glances slightly at his brother, watching him contemplate the universes.

“This will always be home too, Josh. They both will be.”

They grin at one another for a careful moment before moving in tandem, telepathically deciding to play a prank on their little brat of a brother. The twins surround Sam’s chair and his sleeping figure, before tiptoeing with him to the shore. A big splash is heard and then in English, a roaring yell of “What the fuck?!”

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littlemisslipbalm · 2 years

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Why Sammy’s not allowed in the ship’s cockpit

Another 'A billion light years from here' installment!

If the Kiszkas were Aliens!AU and Danny as their human friend

Image Credit: @ofthecaravel ofc!

Heyyyy so I've been writing more about my favorite aliens and human daniel! I'll make a masterlist for this series of little stories so they can be collected in one place besides my master masterlist. The first installment is here if you want a little background but even that isn't extensive and I have wayyy more planned for this strange set of stories that I love so much. They focus largely on family and friendship and fun!!!

Once again, thanks to @ofthecaravel because Karou helps with so much of the inspiration and convos that occur in this. i love u bro <3

Enjoy and let me know what you think, give it a reblog perhaps!

Word Count: 1k | Warnings: baby Kiszkas and Daniel, alien!AU, some swearing, Jake having a potential captain kink? (as an adult ofc)

On Sam’s fifth arrival anniversary, he snuck out with his new human pet, Daniel, to the brothers’ spaceship.

Jake and Josh hadn’t noticed right away. Initially they had been happy to not have to deal with the rambunctious munchkin of a child Sam had chosen to become. They liked doing stuff on their own at this age. Their eight-year-old human bodies and minds only ever wanted to do stuff on their own or tease their little brother. But it was his arrival anniversary or as human’s called it, his birthday. They were told they weren’t supposed to be mean to him today.

But after 10 minutes passed with no interruption to the twin’s construction site in the backyard, Jake grew suspicious and Josh’s ears quickly perked to listen for his younger brother around the house at twin’s request. But he didn’t hear Sam’s breathing or heart beat even. He shut his eyes and focused his mind further out and then he heard him.

In his mind’s eye he saw an image of his baby brother, his body tiny, just the size of a five year old but the ambitions of a stubborn teenager. Sam was rattling around the spacehip, attempting to remember which switches were which. He was babbling to himself…no, not to himself.

“Shoot,” Josh mutters, eyes still closed as Jake watches him curiously. “Sammy’s in the ship.”

“He can’t fly it alone, it’s fine,” Jake shrugs, continuing to dig his hole deeper.

“He’s with Danny too,” Josh comments calmly, knowing Jake will spring to action at this addition.

“Oh, shoot. Shoot, indeed,” Jake’s on his feet, shovel forgotten on the ground as he begins marching towards the forest.

The twins make quick work of the trek through the forest. The path is unforgettable to them. In a flash, Sam is being pulled from the pilot’s seat by Jake and Josh is ushering Danny out of the spaceship, the lock twisting effortlessly behind them.

An eight-year-old Jake holds his little brother by the collar of his shirt after placing Sam onto the forest floor. Sam immediately begins to wail, kicking his feet violently at his brother.

“You can’t bring Dan on the ship, Sammy,” Jake states sternly.

“It’s not fair! It’s my arrival anniversary, I wanna show Daniel the universe!” Sam whines between watery tears.

“You know a human can’t second a ship, Sam,” Jake attempts to reason, rolling his eyes at his younger brother who continues to swing at him, the tears doing anything but subsiding. “Plus, you didn’t even graduate with a pilot’s licence and your legs are way too short to reach the pedals. Now can you stop kicking me, jerk?!”

“It’s not fair! It’s not fair! It’s not fair!” Sam continues to repeat. Jake takes a deep breath and rides out the tantrum.

Josh has the arguably easier job of talking to Danny. After ushering him out of the spaceship, Josh walked him and the younger human off to the side of the clearing, keeping them close enough to Sam and Jake to be in human eyesight but far enough to slightly drown out Sam’s wailing.

“Hey, Dan,” Josh starts as they sit down on some small stones big enough for their small bodies. “That was a spaceship, right?”

“It’s a really cool gift you got for Sam, it looks super realistic.”

“That’s because it is real,” Josh says confidently, but Danny’s chuckle makes his prideful look turn to a frown.

“Can you tell me another story about the pretend aliens out there?”

Josh sighs a little exasperated breath, his eyes going up to the sky for a moment, imagining home for just a moment. “Well, okay, but for the last time, it’s not pretend! We really are aliens!”

Danny giggles and the smile on his face is one of pure joy and delight. “You’re so funny, Josh.”

Josh grins back at the little human beside him.

He was glad Sam had found someone to befriend on Earth. He had a feeling that Danny would become an important person in all their lives, but especially Sam’s. He always worried about his younger brother having someone who was like Jake for him or Josh for his twin, someone to complete him. He had a strong feeling Danny was going to be that for him. Ever since Sam brought Danny home after his first day in preschool the notion had been there, but it grew each year and each time Danny refused to be fazed by the alien thing. If only Josh knew the amount of joy he and his brothers would experience the day Danny finally believed them. But for the eight year old twins and the five year old menace named Sam, that moment was a far ways off.

A couple decades later, the twins are reminiscing on the story. They dubbed it: ‘The reason why Sam’s not allowed in the cockpit. Ever.’ By now, Danny has finally realized that his friends weren’t joking the entire time about their true alien identities and come to terms with it – a story for another time.

“Do you remember that, Dan?” Jake chuckles while Sam has the decency to be embarassed.

“His eyes were like two full moons after I coaxed him off the ship,” Josh cackles. “But he still refused to believe me that it was real.”

“Yeah, vaguely,” Danny agrees. “I mostly just remember Sam being so sure of himself that he could fly that thing and that made me think it couldn’t possibly be real.”

“Fuck you,” Sam bites back his smile and attempts to sound a little bitter. “It’s not my fault I didn’t want to be a pilot, Jake’s schooling seemed boring as fuck.”

“You wish you could’ve been a pilot,” Jake tosses back.

“You just get off on calling yourself Captain…hate to break it to ya’ Jakey but it’s not a pirate ship.” Sam is snide in his remark and Jake’s mouth is agape.

“Sam, don’t be mean to your brother when he’s the one who put up with your tantrums the most throughout the years.” Josh is quick to intercede before anything more is said. Jake looks smug so Josh decides to add. “But you’re right, it isn’t a pirate ship and only the girls in our universe find it cool when you call yourself ‘Captain’.”

Jake uses both his hands to flip off his two brothers at once.

“I love you, guys,” Danny chuckles, grinning with that same boyish delight.

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